InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Guilty Hero ❯ Facade ( Chapter 44 )

[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]

Greetings, one and all.   As usual, I begin the update with an apology for its tardiness.  Unfortunately, working one job in food service and one job in retail during the holidays did not leave my brain much energy to focus on writing.  That's really the only good excuse I have for it. :D
A special thanks go out to Karaumea and horseygurl89 for their fine job in editing the chapter.  They did such lovely jobs. :)
All right, on with the chapter!
Guilty Hero
Chapter 43: Fa?ade

“Sango?” Miroku asked calmly, breaking the uneasy silence that had permeated their office for the past several hours.  “I'm almost finished with the expense reports.  How are you doing on those case summaries?”
“I'm done, thank you,” she replied, her voice equally calm.  “I was merely organizing them into cases to accept and cases to turn down.”
“That's good.  Does that mean you are almost ready to leave for the day?”
“Yes, I am.”
As Sango finished shuffling the last few papers on her desk into a pile, Miroku turned around in his chair to acknowledge the woman standing behind him.  “Kanna, Sango and I have finished our work for the day.  May we go home?”  His tone was far from rude, but there was a stiffness to it that was unnatural.  To anyone who knew him, the lack of warmth in his voice was a dead giveaway of his dislike for the woman.
However, it was doubtful she noticed.  Kanna was utterly devoid of any emotion as she stared at him.  Her pale eyes were so eerie that Miroku could not repress a shudder under her gaze.  Nodding slightly in answer to his question, she silently went to stand by the door and waited for the pair to gather their things.
Miroku fidgeted with the collar of his coat as he and Sango trudged downstairs.  Part of his restlessness was due to the awkward silence, and part was because of Kanna’s unwelcome presence behind them.  Speaking outside of work was frowned upon by the numerous demonic guards and watchdogs Mayor Muso had placed on the building.  In order to enforce this, the workers at the Order were hardly ever alone.  There was always one of Muso’s men, or in Kanna’s case, women two or three steps behind.  Thus, in order to keep their plans secret, Sango and Miroku simply refused to talk about anything but business within the walls of the headquarters.  This led to many uncomfortable moments of silence throughout their day; trips on the elevator were particularly difficult, which was the main reason the pair opted for using the stairs instead.
It’s like being a prisoner in your own home… Miroku thought sadly, glancing at the familiar walls as they passed by.  It wasn’t as though he and Sango were held captive, completely helpless to plan a proper defense and counterattack for the city.  This was simply the first time they had conducted the protection of the city outside of the Order’s headquarters.  HQ had always been their stronghold, their center of operation.  From the battle against Naraku, to the daily trials and tribulations concerning demonic activity, Sango and Miroku had organized it all from their headquarters.  With the building taken away from them, it felt like they had lost their footing.
Miroku sighed as they made their way into the lobby.  Sango glanced at him, her brows pinched together in concern, but he shook his head.  Now was not the time.
They passed the front desk, Miroku trying not to start in surprise.  After seeing Rin there for so long, the sight of a hideous centipede demon clacking its dripping mandibles at them shocked him every time.  Since Rin was the primary information receiver for the Order, Muso was quick to replace her with one of his people.  She was instead given the job of organizing old records held in a dusty storage room.  It was a pointless task, one very unfitting for a young woman as talented as Rin.
“Halt.”  Miroku was jerked out of his thoughts when a gnarled hand the size of a dinner plate smacked him in the chest.   The gruesome face of an ogre peered down at him.  “One at a time.”
He sighed again.  This was yet another way Muso had tightened his grip over the Order.  Members were not allowed to leave in groups.  One at a time was the new rule, with at least two minutes in between.  Muso’s excuse was that leaving alone prevented theft of the valuable artifacts in the Order’s care.  Everyone knew this was a farce, but at the sight of their hulking doorman, few were willing to argue the point.  Yet, he added in his head.
“Well, my dear, I do believe it is ladies first.”  He nodded politely to Sango and took a step back.
“Thank you,” she replied, her tone and posture just as stiff as his.  Casting a slight glare over her shoulder at Kanna, who was watching them silently from the base of the stairs, she stalked past the ogre and out of the building.
Miroku rocked slowly on the balls of his feet and tucked his hands deeper into his pockets.  Much to his chagrin, he was beginning to feel nervous.  Being watched by a silent albino woman, an ogre twice his size, and a monstrous centipede whose gender he could not tell and did not find polite to ask, was not what he called a ‘comfortable situation’.
After what seemed like an eternity of waiting, he finally could not take the silence.  Grinning feebly up at the ogre, he asked, “So… read any good books lately?”
The ogre’s heavy eyebrow rose as he focused his attention on the man standing at his elbow.  However, the stopwatch in his hand beeped, signaling the end of Miroku’s wait.  “Go,” he grunted, stepping aside.
Letting out a gusty breath of relief, Miroku quickly brushed past.  “Until tomorrow, my monosyllabic friend.”
Stepping outside into the brisk winter winds, he made no attempt to catch up with Sango, and neither had she waited for him.  They had learned soon after the Order’s take over that they would be followed home, and any communication between them would be disrupted.  It was useless to try and speak.  When he glanced over his shoulder, he sighed when he spotted a rather ugly cat following after him.  This was to be his watch tonight.
“Hmph.”  Shoving his hands in his pockets, he did his best to ignore the chill in the air and his unwanted companion, and pressed forward.  The sooner he reached their apartment, the sooner he could enjoy Sango’s company.
Able to at last shake the cat when he walked through the doors of the apartment building, he wasted little time getting up to their apartment.  He was pleased to see the light on; it was a sign that Sango had made it home safely.  Not that he would ever tell her from fear of wounding her pride, but he worried for her safety during the walk home every night.  He had tried to get her to drive the car to and from work, but someone had damaged it—the work of a demon, he suspected.
“Sango?  I’m home.”  He hung his coat on a hook by the door next to hers, and then strode down the hallway.
“I’m in the kitchen, Miroku.”
He followed the sound of her voice and smiled at the sight of her preparing drinks for them by the stove.
“I thought we might have hot chocolate tonight,” she said lightly, nodding at the table.  “It’s so cold out that cocoa sounded really good.”
The lightness in her tone was betrayed by her expression.  Miroku followed her gaze to the kitchen table, where a pad of paper and a pen sat.  Slipping into a chair and pulling the notebook toward him, he replied, “Quite right, my dear.”  
Written in Sango’s neat cursive was the message: This has to end.  Nothing is going to get done concerning the city’s protection if we can’t openly work together.  Running around in secret is doing very little.
He shook his head in frustration.  This was their only means of proper communication nowadays, writing notes back and forth like schoolchildren.  Their apartment was watched night and day by a rather powerful demon, one that they knew they could not engage.  And somehow, though they still could not understand how, their conversations were being monitored.  Anything related to the Order was recorded and typed up for Kanna to go over with them the next day.  They learned quickly not to discuss business at home, but they had to find some way to make plans.
And how do you suggest we find a safe place?  We can’t go to the Higurashi shrine.  We’ll be followed and found out in minutes.  He pushed the notebook back to her end of the table.  “Is it almost ready?   I'm chilled to the bone.”  Keeping up a normal conversation couldn’t hurt, were they being recorded.
But we cannot plan the city’s salvation on notebook paper.  We need a place of operation, a place where we cannot be taken over.  “Just about.  The water isn’t ready quite yet.”  Sango handed him the notebook.
You mean, like the Order’s headquarters?  That place is a little occupied right now, if you hadn’t noticed.  Miroku gave her a look as he passed the paper back.
Frowning, Sango scribbled another message.  No, we can’t work at the Order yet.  We can’t afford a hostile takeover until we find out exactly what we are up against.
Ah,so you are planning one?   Miroku raised an eyebrow at her, a smirk hovering near his lips.
Rolling her eyes, she nodded in exasperation.  Of course I am.  When the time comes, we will need to take back the Order.  But for now, we just need information.  And we need a place to take in, report and organize said information.  I suggest here.
The shrill squeal of the tea kettle made the pair jump in their seats.  Sango quickly poured the water into their cups as Miroku scrawled his reply and set a mug in front of him when she returned to the table.  “Here, mix it yourself.  But, be careful; it's hot.”
Miroku smiled at her brusque manner.  “'I won't do everything for you, but be careful'?  Is that what you're saying?”
With a frown at him, she snatched the notebook from his hands and read his reply.
What about our little watchdog, waiting patiently right outside the window?  He won't respond kindly to our little secret meetings.  He didn't care much for my sutras if you recall.
Thoughtfully stirring her cocoa, Sango flicked her brown eyes up at Miroku, and he smiled in curiosity.  He could tell she had come up with an idea, and he sincerely hoped it was a good one.  “Shall we go watch a movie?” she suggested innocently, continuing their perfectly normal conversation as she wrote quickly in the notebook.  “It might be fun.”
“Of course, my dear.  I'll go set it up.”  Offering to do so gave Sango the chance to finish writing.  By the time they were both settled on the couch with the movie flickering on the screen, she was able to hand the paper off to Miroku.
I have heard from Kaede that Kagome is growing more powerful with each training session,  the note read.  Do you think it would be possible to test her strength on our watchdog?  With the guard distracted, you would be able to raise a shield around the building.  We could have our safe house, and we could see how Kagome has progressed.
It might be risky,  Miroku replied, relieved that the movie was an excuse to quit their inane spoken conversation.  Don't we need to keep Kagome a secret?  She is our ace-in-the-hole, after all.  If we let the enemy know of her power too soon, before she is ready...  I would hate to see what might become of her then.
Sango frowned and rubbed her forehead before she wrote down a response.  That may be a risk we have to take.  We are getting very little done puttering around at the Order every day.  Koga may be working with the police force and Myoga may be keeping in contact with all the members, but that won't be enough.  We need to be ready when the time comes.
Once Miroku skimmed the page, he leaned back in the couch and ran his fingers through his hair.  He hated the thought of putting Kagome into the fray before she was completely prepared.  However, Sango was right.  They had very few options.
Slowly scratching in a reply, Miroku passed the notebook back to her and gave her a sad smile.
I'll contact Kaede tomorrow and set up the date.
Gripping his hand, Sango nodded.  Then, after setting the notebook on the coffee table, she pulled her legs up onto the couch and leaned into Miroku.  It was a rare sign of affection, and he welcomed it.  
He placed his arm around her shoulders and kissed her hair.  It was quite calming, focusing on the woman he loved, rather than the fate of the city.  He continued to trail soft kisses down her neck and he slowly wrapped his other arm around her.  He had been waiting for this for a while.  Work had kept them busy, so busy that they came home in complete exhaustion and warped with stress.  This was just the release he had been looking for for days.  But before he got much farther, he felt a tap on the back.
“Miroku?”
Glancing up, he smiled charmingly at her, praying he hadn't sparked her temper.  “Yes, my dear?”
She nodded at the notebook.  “We need to...”
“Ah, yes.”  With a sigh, he disentangled himself from Sango and stood up.  “Business before pleasure.”  Ripping the used pages out, he carried them into the kitchen and grabbed the matchbox.  He held the paper over the sink and then set the corners on fire.  Watching as the blackened pieces dropped into the metal basin, he shook his head in dismay.
“Everything is so difficult.”  He couldn't work in peace anymore.  He couldn't walk home without being followed.  He couldn't have a spoken conversation with his companion.  He couldn't even show her some affection without having to worry about their safety first.
Glancing back into the living room where Sango was patiently watching the movie, he frowned deeply and shoved his hands in his pockets.  As he trudged out of the kitchen, he couldn't help but mutter, “This damn war has totally killed the mood!”

“All right, child,” Kaede sighed, picking up the empty dishes from Kagome's lunch.  “I think you have rested long enough.  Are you able to continue?”
Brushing the crumbs off her shirt, Kagome quickly got to her feet.  “Yes, I'm ready.”  Pausing for lunch was always the most refreshing break during her arduous training sessions.  It was necessary in order for her to continue letting loose such powerful blasts of energy in constant repetition.  Her training rarely changed; it was always an effort of releasing more and more powerful blows.  Kaede still insisted that she had yet to tap into her true power, and Kagome simply couldn't understand what was holding her back.  Try as she might, she could rarely create a blast strong enough to satisfy Kaede's wishes.
Locking a bolt in place, she leveled her crossbow at the sutra Kaede had placed on the head of a jizo statue.  It was several paces away and required a powerful blast to destroy the sutra.  It was a special make of Kaede's—the sutra absorbed holy power up to an extent.  When it was overwhelmed with power, it would explode.  Kagome was required to make the sutra explode with each bolt fired, and she had yet to accomplish this task.
“You may fire when ready,” Kaede called out, standing back at a safe distance.  “Continue until the sutra is destroyed.”
Nodding, Kagome narrowed her eyes, concentrated her power into the sharp little bolt and let it fly.  A sizable beam exploded from her crossbow, but the sutra swallowed the entire blast.  A small stream of smoke drifted from the jizo's head, but that was the only mark left from her attack.
With a soft sigh, she loaded another crossbow and tried again.  It was growing rather difficult to take an interest in her work.  She was utterly bored.  It was the same thing, day after day, and she felt as though she had nothing to show for it.  Her blasts never got stronger, but the exercises never changed.  And with her boredom, came the unfortunate habit of daydreaming.
Another bolt was absorbed by the sutra as her thoughts began to drift.
I wonder how Inu-Yasha is doing today.   He was so exhausted yesterday when he got home.  Something had changed in the half-demon; that was for certain.  She was unsure of what happened, but he had developed a strange sense of determination seemingly overnight.  She had the haunting suspicion that something had happened during his training session with Koga, but had never found a good time to ask.    With Inu-Yasha's new-found desire to quit smoking, his temperament had grown rather volatile, and she hated to become an irritation to him.
Thwack!   The next bolt clattered to the ground, every drop of energy inhaled by the sutra.
I'm proud of him for training at the gym every day but I wish I knew why he is suddenly doing this.  It's unusual for him to show this kind of dedication.   He had indeed visited the gym to train each day since his session with Koga, and returned home irritable, exhausted, and panting for breath.  However, for the past two weeks, he had doggedly pursued his work despite the apparent lack of progress.  I wish I knew what was driving him.  I would love to help if I could.  A small smile worked its way onto her face.  I really am proud of him for working so hard, though.  The only other thing he has been so diligent at is his drinking program.
Thwack!   The blast fired was so weak that the bolt wavered off course and singed the arm of the jizo.
He's so cute when he's determined,  she couldn't help but think as a slight giggle escaped her.  I love how brash he gets when he defends his actions now.  It's such a far cry from the half-demon I first met.
Thwack!   A faint blue mist barely eked out of the bolt when it clattered to the gravel a couple feet in front of the jizo.
“Kagome, concentrate!” Kaede said loudly, displeasure seeping into her tone.  “You must focus if you are to create a stronger blast!  An attack like that will take out no enemy!”
Nodding to show she was listening, Kagome took a deep breath and focused on the target.  All right, girl.  Don't get distracted by Inu-Yasha.  Judging from the way he looks when he gets home, he doesn't get distracted by you while he's training!
Frowning in concentration, a crackling white-blue energy blossomed around the point of the bolt from her efforts.  If he can work so hard, then so can I!  If he is trying so hard to break free from his own barriers, then I can too!  I am his example!  I need to prove to him that boundaries can be broken!  Her intensity that stemmed from her desire to care for the half-demon proved formidable.  The bolt was quaking in the shaft of the crossbow, quivering in anticipation.
At last, she pressed the trigger and released the bolt.  It exploded from the crossbow like a firecracker and shot across the lot, gouging out and tossing aside great heaps of gravel along the way.  The instant the weapon hit the sutra, a fireball went up and a resounding boom echoed around the grounds.
Both Kaede and Kagome stood and stared as smoke billowed out and gravel and chunks of concrete rained down.  When the smoke finally settled, they saw nothing left of the poor jizo but a rubble-filled crater.
“Goodness...” Kagome breathed at last, mildly shocked that she was capable of producing such a blast.  
“Hm.”  Kaede slowly nodded.  “Much better, child.  Much better.”  She shuffled closer to stand next to Kagome.  “That is the closest you've come to making your holy energy powerful enough to defeat this new threat to the city.  Tell me, what is it you did differently?”
Kagome paused to think.  What had she done differently?  Her technique was the same: focus your energy in the bolt, and fire.  It was quite simple.  So why had the last attack been so different from the others?  I was just thinking about Inu-Yasha, that's all.  I don't really see why that would change anything... Right?
“I... I don't know,” she honestly replied, looking down at Kaede in confusion.  “I just did it.”
“Hm,” Kaede said again, narrowing her eyes as she studied the girl.  “Well.  I believe I have seen enough progress now.  I have some news for you.”
Kagome cocked her head in curiosity.  “Yes?”
Kaede slowly led Kagome over to the bench and sat down, gesturing for Kagome to do the same.  “I received contact from Sango and Miroku yesterday,” she began once Kagome was settled.
“Contact?” Kagome repeated in surprise.  Since Kaede had been practically banned from the Order's headquarters by Muso's cronies, contact between her and the two leaders was very difficult to achieve.  For Sango and Miroku to attempt reaching her, it meant that the situation was growing more dire.
“Yes.  It was difficult, but the message I received was important.  So, with the work I have seen you do today, I am convinced that you are ready.”
Kagome's brow furrowed.  “Ready for what?”
Kaede gave her a grim smile.  “For your first assignment.”

With a soft moan, Inu-Yasha dragged his aching body up the last step to his apartment.  He had really pushed himself at the gym today and was now paying dearly for it.  Not only were his muscles crying out in pain from the workout they were unused to, but his chest throbbed from the torture of trying to breathe.  He had once again ended the session flat on his back and gasping for air.  It was painful, humiliating and infuriating.  But, he was determined to break past this block.  
Already gnawing on a piece of nicotine gum, he rested a shaky hand on the doorknob and let himself in.  He was greeted by the sound of the television, the sight of light pouring into the room and the scent of dinner simmering on the stove as Kagome pattered about the kitchen.  Despite how dreadful he felt, he couldn't help but allow a small grin to tug at his lips.  He had very much grown to look forward to this particular time of day.
Shuffling stiffly inside, his body groaned with every movement.  He dropped his coat and hat on the armchair and sank onto the couch with a sigh.  Much as he would have liked to join Kagome in the kitchen, his battered bones desired the comfort of a sofa cushion, not the hard wood of a kitchen chair.  
However, it mattered little.  As soon as she heard him sit down, she went to greet him with a cheerful smile.  “Inu-Yasha!  I was wondering when you'd get here.  You were a little later than usual today.”
“Hey, Kagome,” he mumbled, resting his head against the back of the couch and shutting his eyes.  He really wasn't feeling well.  His training sessions were arduous enough.  But to make matters worse, he now had to deal with withdrawal from both nicotine and alcohol.  By the end of the day, the effects were a formidable opponent to fight.
Opening his eyes into slits, he peered up at her.  Concerned at how tired she looked, he resolved to keep his own mouth shut about his aches and pains.  He knew her training was far more draining than his own.  How she was able to come home and still be able to wear a smile and cook dinner was far beyond his knowledge.
“Are you all right?” was her next inevitable question, her voice full of concern.  He was probably a horrible sight.
“Just great,” he grunted in reply.  It wasn't the truth, of course, but she needn't know that.  “What about you?”  He fixed her with his piercing gaze.
“Exhausted,” she admitted, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear that had come loose while she was cooking.  “Mind if I join you?  Dinner just needs to simmer for a while.”
Resisting the urge to roll his eyes, for the answer to that question was quite obvious, he pulled his legs in so she could get around and climb onto the cushions next to him.  He welcomed her company.  She was soothing and an excellent distraction from the less healthy desires trying to claim his attention.  Speaking of which...
“Kagome, what time is it?”
She blinked at him, a little surprised.  She had been expecting a more interesting conversation-starter than a request for the time.  “Time?  Well, dinner will be ready in about twenty minutes.  If you're hungry now, I can get you something--”
“No, no,” he interrupted, irritation evident in his tone.  “What's the damn time?”
“Oh!”  Quickly realizing what he wanted, she glanced at her watch.  “It's a quarter after five.”
He let out a soft growl and leaned his head back on the couch.  That was not what he wanted to hear.  Ever since his rigorous sessions at the gym began, waiting until six o'clock was no longer as easy as it had once been.  He gave himself quite a beating in his training, both physically and mentally.  His pride was not allowing him to accept his defeat to Koga.  He needed to prove that he had not fallen as far as everyone seemed to believe.  But with his lungs locked in a cage of tar and his flesh still struggling against its dependence on liquor, his body could not fulfill the requirements he set for himself.  Utter weakness was the result at the end of the day.  He had little power left to fight desire.
Taking a deep breath to soothe his frayed nerves, he turned his head to glance at Kagome.  She was studying him with concern written all over her face.
He gave her a weak grin.  “I'm fine,” he told her in the most assuring tone he could muster.  “I'm just... uh... cold.”
“Cold?” she repeated, raising an eyebrow.  It was obvious she didn't believe a word.
“Yes,” he replied stubbornly.  “And I just need...”  He reached over her head and pulled his favorite red afghan off the back of the couch.  “...a blanket.”  Draping it over their legs, he grunted, “See?  I'm fine now.  Quit worryin'.”
Leaning forward so he could properly cover their feet with the blanket, he stopped dead when he came eye-level with the coffee table.  Sitting directly in front of him was a pack of cigarettes and a lighter.  He stared at the small box for several seconds, unblinking.  It was amazing how rapidly the desire for a smoke swept over him, blocking out all his other senses.  The piece of gum in his mouth was nothing against the sight of those little white sticks.  Perhaps he could have just one.  Surely it wouldn't hurt.
“Inu-Yasha?”  Kagome's voice brought him crashing back to reality.  “Are you okay?”
Sitting up straight, he closed his eyes and turned away.  “Get those damn things away from me,” he snapped, refusing to face the table.  “Take 'em, hide 'em, trash 'em, I don't care.  Just get them out of my sight.”
Hearing the urgency in his voice, she didn't bother asking questions.  Without a word, she was off the couch and out of the room with the pack in her hand.
Once she was gone, Inu-Yasha sighed and collapsed against the back of the sofa.  Already a headache had begun to rage behind his skull, brought on from the mere sight of the precious commodity.  During the day he was usually able to distract himself, and the headache was kept at bay.  But with his focus suddenly returned to his cigarettes, his resistance crumbled.  Wiping his forehead, for he had begun to sweat, he cursed himself for being a fool.  
 Since Kagome had remained unusually quiet about his commitment to quit smoking, he was forced to come up with his own regimen.  Quitting cold turkey was not an option, as he recalled his dreadful attempt to cut out booze in that way, so he instead opted for an easier plan.  He chose to allow himself a few cigarettes in the morning while Kagome was away and thus not bothered by the smoke.  He then relied on gum for the rest of the day.  However, apparently that morning he had been foolish enough to leave his smokes sitting out in the open when he left for training.  That was a mistake he now knew not to make again.  Dammit, why does this have to be so hard?
Kagome returned fairly quickly to the room. He abruptly sat up and kept his eyes focused on his lap as she claimed her seat next to him on the couch.
“All right, Inu-Yasha,” she said calmly, shifting on the cushion so she was facing him.  “This time, you can't cover it up.  You're not doing so well, are you?”
His mouth turned into a pinched frown as he stared down at his hands resting on his lap.  They were trembling uncontrollably on the soft yarn; it was a sensation that had become so familiar that he barely noticed anymore.  However, now that it was brought to his attention, he quickly gripped his hands to still their movement.  He glanced guiltily over at Kagome, but she could tell his mouth was going to remain clamped shut.  He would never admit it.
This caused her to give him a gentle smile.  He was as stubborn as ever, and she was glad for it.  He was going to need that tenacity to break free from his troubles.
“I'm just a little curious...” she began slowly, drawing out her words as she thought of the best way to approach the topic.  “What made you decide to quit smoking?  I thought you were going to wait until you were sober.”  As his nurse, she had felt that was the best course of action for him.  But she needed to know the reasoning behind his actions before rebuking them or not.
His ears twitched in her direction when she posed the question, though his gaze remained fixed on his lap.  Judging from the strange display of emotions dancing across his face, this decision to quit smoking was a little more complicated than she had thought.  Since she knew it often took him longer than others to voice his feelings, she patiently stayed quiet and calmly waited for his response.
Watching him as his lips tugged back into a tiny snarl and his fists twitched restlessly on his lap due to his frustration, an errant thought drifted into Kagome's head.  He is so cute when he's trying to work through a problem like this.  She sat up and blinked in surprise.  That was the second time today such a thought had crossed her mind.  Although more than a bit confused by this, she quickly shook her head to clear it.  Now was the time to focus on Inu-Yasha.
“It's that damn wolf's...”  Inu-Yasha started to speak, but he trailed off and growled.  His frustration was evident as he  started over.  
Taking a deep breath, he tried again.  “My second training session with Koga,” he stated, twisting his fingers involuntarily as he held his temper back.  “It started out all right.  Just some low-level stretches.  Even you could have done 'em.”
Kagome raised an eyebrow at the insult he had unwittingly thrown her way, but she brushed it off.  He clearly hadn't meant it.
“Then that...wolf,” he choked out the word as though it pained him not to add a more biting remark, “raised the bar a bit.  Had me doing some more difficult exercises.  By the third round, I was already out of breath.”  He glanced at her to make sure she was following him, and she nodded in response.  She remembered well how quickly his breath was taken from him during his first training bout.  And from the look of his scowl and furrowed brow, he was just as angered this second time as he had been the first time.
“The last exercise was punching,” he went on.  “Koga wore boxing mitts, and I had to punch 'em as hard as I could.  And I did, Kagome, I hit those damn things with everything I had.”  The intensity in his tone was rising.  His fangs were bared at his lap.
“He took every blow like it was nothing.  He didn't even step back.  He even started to get angry at me because of it.  I could tell...”  Two fistfuls of the afghan were gathered up in his hands as he growled.  “He purposefully pissed me off.  He kept goading me, mocking me, daring me to do better.”
His ears twitched in ill-concealed anger.  “I took the bait.  I hit that damn wolf in the face with the hardest punch I could muster.”
Kagome had to resist the urge to rebuke him.  That was exactly what she had been hoping Koga would avoid at their next encounter, and it seemed he had not tried very hard.
Her attention was quickly regained when Inu-Yasha whipped his head up to stare at her, his gaze burning with fury.  “He hit right back,” he snarled at her.
“I still don't see why you're quite so angry over all this,” she said gently, attempting to calm him down.  “You've been in fights with Koga before.  From what I've heard from Sango and Miroku, you two have quite the battle record.”
“That's just it!”  Inu-Yasha's voice rose with each sentence.  “We've been fighting for years, and every time, I win!  The only reason we keep fighting is because he just won't take the hint that I'm the better fighter!  So that last punch I threw?  It should have knocked him out cold and it didn't!  He kept fighting back!”
He surged to his feet, tossing his afghan aside and pointing a trembling claw at Kagome.  “And you know what the worst part was?!  When I was flat on my back, trying to take a damn breath, he looked down at me and he...”  He trailed off, his jaw clenching shut.  Judging from the angered flush painting his cheeks, Kagome could tell that this was the most embarrassing moment of the session.  
“He pitied me.  That bastard pitied me.”
Ah.   The light bulb clicked on in Kagome's head.  Now she understood everything.  The drive to quit smoking.  His diligent, daily training.  All were a result of a desire to prove himself worthy again.
“I'm better than that, Kagome,” he hissed, jabbing a finger into his chest to prove his point.  “I don't need some damn wimpy wolf feeling sorry for me because he thinks I can't fight anymore!  I am way too good for that!  I could beat his ass a thousand times over!”  He paused in his tirade, his eyes widening in anger as he looked at her.  “Why the hell are you laughing at me?!”
Kagome was indeed grinning ear to ear at him, completely unafraid of his temper.  “I'm not laughing at you, Inu-Yasha,” she assured him, leaning back in the couch when he took a step toward her.  “It's just that this seems to me to be a simple matter of wounded pride!”
“Yes!” he shouted in exasperation, towering over her on the couch.  “So why the hell are you laughing at me?!  It's not funny!”
Kagome got to her feet as well, forcing Inu-Yasha to step back.  Placing her hands on her hips, she smiled at him like a proud parent.  “Inu-Yasha, when was the last time you felt any kind of pride in yourself at all?”
He stopped short and stared at her with a strange blend of anger and confusion.  “What?” he snapped.
“It's quite simple.  If you have wounded pride, then you have to have some pride in the first place, right?  Listen to yourself!  'I'm better than that,' or, 'I'm way too good for that!'  See what I mean?”
He was still upset, but she had effectively distracted him from blowing his top.  Now he was more puzzled than infuriated.  “Huh?”
She stepped forward and poked a finger into his chest, making him look down in surprise.  “This is a big step for you, Inu-Yasha.  This means you are gaining confidence.  This means you are putting more faith  in your abilities.  This...” She gestured at him as a whole.  “...is a far cry from the man I first met on that hospital bed.”
As he stared dumbly at her, she turned and reclaimed her seat on the couch.  Grinning up at him, she said, “I'm proud of you, Inu-Yasha.  This is good news.  It doesn't matter how upset you are about this, it is still good news.”  That being said in a tone of finality, she snagged the remote off the coffee table and flipped to a different channel.  He was left standing alone, feeling a bit foolish and still quite angry.
With a scowl, he slowly eased himself back on the couch.  That may be, Kagome, he thought bitterly, casting a sidelong glance at her.  But it doesn't solve my problems.  I'm still too weak in a fight.  I still need to beat Koga again.  Hell, I still can't even breathe!  Hmph.  And she wants me to be happy about all this?  He crossed his arms and glared at the television set in full-on sulk mode.
However, it took only a minute for him to look over at Kagome again.  She was thrilled, he could tell.  It was almost like she could hardly sit still; she was so excited over what had happened.  He supposed, looking at things from her point of view, she might have reason to be happy.  He knew that he was a particularly stubborn patient to look after.  In Kagome's opinion, any sort of breakthrough was probably nothing short of a miracle.  He snorted at the thought.
Fine, Kagome.  He sighed inwardly.  If you say it's good news, then I suppose it is.  Finally accepting the fact that his anger was perhaps a bit overzealous, he visibly relaxed.  Tension eased out of his shoulders, and he let out a soft sigh as he sank back into the cushions.  Having precious little energy to waste, it was foolish to hold on to anger.  Six o' clock was still several minutes away, as he was acutely aware.
Five twenty-three,  he thought after a quick peek at the clock.  Thirty-seven minutes to wait.  Slowly taking a deep breath, he attempted to focus his attention on the television, a task made more difficult with a headache pounding out a rhythm on his brain.  A distraction would be more than welcome.
“Well...”  Kagome suddenly piped up in a conversational tone, jarring his focus away from the screen.  “Speaking of good news, I have a bit of good news myself.  Would you like to hear?”
“O' course,” he grunted, giving her a tired glance.  It was quite obvious she was excited about this.  “Something good happen during your training today?”
She smiled at him, pride shining through her expression.  “You could say so.  I guess I have done well with my training, because Kaede informed me...”  She paused for effect, waiting for Inu-Yasha to prompt her on.
Resisting the urge to roll his eyes, for he had little patience for games, he still tried to humor her.  “Kaede said what?  You were the best damn priestess in the whole outfit?”
Kagome slapped him lightly on the leg.  “Of course not, silly.  I'm the only priestess in the outfit.  Well, except for Kaede herself, I suppose.”
“All right, all right.  So what did she say?”
Shifting on the couch so she could face him properly, Kagome said, “Kaede informed me that since I was doing so well, it was time to give me my first assignment!”
Inu-Yasha stared blankly at her.  Judging from her tone and ecstatic expression, this was the good news she had been itching to tell him.  However, he was having a hard time finding the 'good' in it.
“Your first... training assignment?  Like, is Kaede going with you?”
“No, this is my first solo assignment!  All on my own!  Isn't it wonderful?  At last, a chance for me to feel useful to the Order!  Ever since the Order has been taken over, I have been absolutely useless.  All I did was take up Kaede's time.  But not anymore!”  She held up a fist in Inu-Yasha's face.  “It's time for me to be a strong arm for this operation!”
Grinning weakly and holding up his shaky hands in mock-defense, he uttered a pathetic, “Whoa, girl.  I'm not the one you need to be beating up.”
She merely laughed and backed off.  He lowered his hands as she continued to prattle on, mostly about how her training sessions had gone that had led up to this point.  It was mindless drivel, really, but he was aware that she was in a playful mood.  Clearly, this was a huge deal for her, and the joy she felt with success filled her with energy that he simply could not keep up with.
While Kagome was elated and her optimism buoyed by this opportunity, his heart sank at the thought.  Kagome, his Kagome, going out to battle demons on her own.  And what was worse, he could not join her.  Being banned from all operations at the Order, there really was no hope of him tagging along.  He was decidedly unsettled as images of hulking, grotesque ogres swooping down on Kagome ran rampant through his head.  Yes, she had been training, but would it really be enough for her to protect herself?  These were no ordinary demons.  The city was preparing for a war, not simple games.
Studying Kagome carefully as she continued to chat, the false smile slid off his face.  She would be out there, alone.  And, he could not protect her.  His stomach nearly did a flip flop at the idea.  And, even worse, even if he was allowed to accompany her, his body would fail him if he ever had to protect her.  His endless training sessions at the gym told him that.
He chewed anxiously on his lip at the thought.  Damn it all...  This couldn't have come at a worse time.
“Inu-Yasha?”  Her voice quickly snagged his attention.  
He looked up at her, blinking in surprise.  “Yeah, what?”
“Are you all right?  I mean...  Well, you don't seem very happy about this.  Is something wrong?”
Swallowing hard, he shook his head.  “N-no, no.  I'm happy for you, Kagome.  This is... uh, this is a big step for you.  Congratulations.”  He tried weakly to put on a cheerful facade for her.  He didn't need to spoil her good mood with his concerns.
Luckily, his pitiful attempts fooled her.  She smiled brightly at him.  “Thank you, Inu-Yasha.  This is such an important thing for me.  You know, maybe you could give me some pointers on fighting demons.  I'm not sure about the specifics for the assignment, but any tips would be helpful.  Especially from a seasoned veteran like you.”
Before he could even get out a halfhearted reply, she was suddenly on her feet.  “Whoops!  I need to give dinner a stir.  Hang on just a moment.”  And then, she was off to the kitchen.
With her rather energetic presence gone from the room, Inu-Yasha laid his head back in exhaustion.  In a stark opposite to Kagome's chipper mood, he felt terribly beaten down.  Just thinking of all the bad news of the day made him groan in frustration.
Six o' clock couldn't come soon enough.

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Well, that's it for now.  Things are finally starting to get rolling with Kagome and the Order.  Thanks so much for reading.  Please leave a review and let me know your thoughts!


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