InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Heart's Landfill ❯ A Cynic's Truth ( Chapter 26 )

A/N: As always all characters will be walking that fine line called OOCness. I would like to begin by saying thank you to the four people that voted for this fic. Of course it didn't win, but it was nice being nominated. Good news… Good news!! I finally have my new laptop and I love it! I don't care for the `vista effect', but what can I say; I don't really have a choice now do I? Anyway, first, I want to thank my readers-especially the ones that review religiously, and second I want to thank my wonderful awe-inspiring betas, Neko and the Akiko the Kitchen Elf!! Now on to the chapter!! Oh, and I made this one long, since I took so long to update. FYI: School is kicking my natural born ass!!

 

Disclaimer: I do not claim ownership to anyone with the exception of Nya, Dr. Aikio, and Malcolm. All others belong to the wonderful Rumiko Takahashi.

 

Chapter 26

 

A Cynic's Truth

 

How long had he been standing out in her hallway telling himself that he should just turn around and leave? How many times had he hit the button for the elevator, only to have it come and leave without him getting in? How many times had he attempted to knock on her door only to chicken out?

 

`I should just leave,' he told himself. `This… Me coming here is not a good idea.'

 

Turning away from her door, he walked back towards the elevator only to stop again. `She's not like other women. I couldn't… I can't just…' Shaking his head, he tried not to get ahead of himself.

 

She hadn't promised him sex. She hadn't told him anything of the sort, just simply, “If you want to talk, you can come over.” That's it, no more, no less.

 

But he knew, didn't he? He knew that there was possibly more between them than either of them was willing to admit. He knew that all it would take was a touch, a look, a simplistic smile and this friendship-if you could call it that-would take on a life of its own.

 

Knowing all that, the hanyou still couldn't bring himself to turn around and leave the same way he'd come.

 

`What the hell am I doing here? Why can't I treat her like all the rest? Why do I even care?'

 

Turning so that his back was against the wall of her unit, he could hear her talking with someone as she meandered around the condo. Of course, if he had wanted to, he could've easily heard everything she said. However, instead, he directed his attention away from her voice and towards her mesmerizing scent that filtered into the hallway through the cracks below her door, like the fingers of ethereal spirit beckoning him to his doom.

 

It pulled him off the elevator; it told him that, where she was concerned, nothing was as simple as he would've liked to make it, and it was the one…the only thing that forced him to finally knock.

 

His knuckles rapped three times against her door.

 

Inuyasha could hear her easily, so he knew she heard it, but she didn't answer. Instead it seemed that she was trying to hang up with someone, so he waited patiently while the voice-the one he hated-whispered in the back of his mind, telling him to leave…telling him that he'd done his part.

 

`It's just a friendly visit, that's all. Just a friendly visit,' he coaxed himself as he knocked once more.

 

He felt her aura draw nearer to the door and his heart began to pound within his chest. He inhaled heavily, and then exhaled slowly while telling himself, `She's just Kagome, the quirky, bitchy, and brilliant woman that almost killed me! I can do this! I can be her friend without anything happening between us. This…this is just… a friendly visit, and nothing more.'

 

Closing his eyes, he placed his palm flat against her door and willed himself to disappear or wake up; he didn't care which happened, he just wanted one of them to happen.

 

Opening his eyes, he thought childishly, `Shit, I'm still here!' Sighing slightly, he slowly raised his hand and prepared to knock again for the last time, but paused when he heard her sweet voice call out, “Who is it?”

 

Simonkal of Inuy

 

“Why did I call you again?” Kagome huffed into her cordless phone as she lit a vanilla scented candle that was sitting on her kitchen countertop.

 

“Because you're a wimp,” Sango replied with a giggle.

 

“I am not!”

 

“Well, instead of getting sexy for Adonis, you're on the phone with me talking about absolute nonsense. So, I'd say that that means that you are a wimp!”

 

“Gods, I hate you sometimes! I only called you to let you know that he was coming over just in case something happened,” Kagome tried to explain as she picked up the remote control for her stereo and hit the power button.

 

“What do you think is going to happen, huh? Do you think he's going the ravage your body without your permission? Or maybe…just maybe that's what you want him to do.”

 

“You're sick, you know that? And I'm sorry I even call you my friend!”

 

Sango laughed heartily into the phone and then offered, “Honestly, I'm proud of you. This is a major step in the right direction. Although, I must admit, I didn't mean for you to invite him over when I talked to you earlier.”

 

“Trust me; it comes as a surprise to me as well. When I called him earlier, I was only calling to say hi. The rest just kind of happened, believe it or not,” Kagome admitted as she tuned the stereo to a station that played nothing but smooth jazz and lowered the volume so that it was only background music.

 

“Regardless of how it happened, I'm glad it did. What are you wearing? Hopefully something showing a lot of skin?” Sango inquired evenly.

 

“Please. I have on a tank top and a pair of gauchos. I wanted to be comfortable, you know? Every other time that he's seen me, I'm always dressed for work or a date,” she finished and then mumbled, “Except in Hawaii.”

 

“You're absolutely no fun! Anyway, how's your hair?”

 

Rolling her eyes, Kagome answered quickly, “I have it up in a ponytail, okay? I already told you, I'm going for comfort tonight.”

 

“It sounds more like you're going for homely to me.”

 

“Go to hell,” Kagome bit out petulantly.

 

“You keep telling me that and I keep telling you right after you tell me how the weather is there.”

 

A soft knock on the door cut off Kagome's response. `He's here! Shit, he's here,' she thought excitedly. Turning her attention back to her friend on the phone, she stated quickly, “Alright, I have to go! He's here!”

 

“Okay, but let me give you the rules first; there are none. Do you understand? Don't be yourself, because you'll push him away, be the person you once were or shit…” Sango continued with a chuckle, “…be me and fuck his brains out!”

 

“For heavens' sake Sango, have you no class,” Kagome observed, turning quickly to the mirror that was mounted on the wall beside her entertainment center. Running her hand over her hair and down her long thick ponytail, she finished, “You're unbelievable!”

 

There was another light knock and Kagome grimaced. Part of her wanted to run to the door to greet him, but the other part-the scary, wimpy part-wanted to run into her room and hide under the sheets until he stopped knocking and left.

 

“Seriously Kagome, have fun, okay? And you better tell me everything tomorrow understand?”

 

“Yeah, yeah whatever,” the frazzled young woman replied as she stared at the door. Shutting the phone off, she stepped slowly towards the door, her heart ramming within her chest with every step she took.

 

Her stomach felt like it was filled with butterflies, her hands were sweaty, her mouth was dry, and she could feel little goose bumps begin to rise up over every inch of bare skin.

 

`Relax, Kagome, it's just Inuyasha. It's just…It's just the one man that makes your knees weak!' She stepped back, tried to regain her composure. `He's just a man. He's nobody special. He's just…he's just waiting on the other side of the door for me to open it!'

 

Shaking herself as if she could shed the nervousness, Kagome stepped forward slowly until she was a breath away from the door. Placing one palm flat against the door, she gripped the knob with the other and asked, “Who is it?”

 

Simonkal of Inuy

 

“Took you long enough,” Inuyasha quipped as he quickly gave her the once over.

 

He immediately noticed the way the black tank top she wore hugged her full breasts and wrapped snuggly around her flat stomach, showing him just the right amount of cleavage and a small sensual sliver of her inviting midriff.

 

After briefly allowing his eyes to travel down over her hips to her thighs, he forced himself to drag his attention back up to her beautiful, make-up free face, which he was sure was staring at him, watching him, watch her.

 

Feeling more than a little self-conscious because of the way that he was staring at her, Kagome stepped back opening the door a little wider, so that he could pass through.

“Sorry about that. I was on the phone with a friend that wouldn't stop talking.”

 

As he passed her, she couldn't stop her eyes from roaming down his broad, t-shirt clad back, to his jean clad rear end that looked too perfect to be real. Shaking her head as she forced her eyes back up to an area of his body that didn't make her feel like she was undressing him, she thought, `Behave Kagome. You seriously don't want to step into those muddy waters with him,' as she slowly closed the door behind him.

 

Glancing around the partially lit living room, one hand shoved deep in his pocket, the hanyou turned to face her. “Nice place. Do you always light candles and play soft music when you have friends coming over?”

 

Her eyes seemed to have a mind of their own as they began to slowly drift down and over his well muscled chest, his flat, probably chiseled stomach, and then down to his crotch.

 

Swallowing hard, Kagome turned quickly away from him and pretended to check the locks on the door as she tried to regain her composure.

 

`Gods, what's wrong me? Why am I acting like Sango?'

 

After a few long, quiet seconds, she finally turned back to face him, but couldn't make herself look directly at him as she quickly stepped forward and around him; the nervousness that she was feeling was a palpable thing.

 

“Well… Well, yeah,” she lied. “I know you don't think that I did this for you,” she finished as she stepped into the kitchen that sat just off of the living room.

 

Inuyasha chuckled as he quickly stepped out of his shoes and set them by the door. “Aw, I actually thought that maybe I was special to you.” His only goal was to quell the nervousness that he could feel coming off her lithe body in waves; it was also that same nervousness that made him forget that just moments ago he was feeling the same way-if not more so.

 

“In your dreams, Dog-boy,” Kagome quipped without thinking about it.

 

The hanyou was a little taken aback by that, but quickly shook it off. Chuckling lightly, he replied, his tone filled with sarcasm, “Candle light, soft music, and pet names? Wow, you really know how to make a man feel unwanted.”

 

“Well, I figured that since your were having such a horrendous day, I could at least pretend to care.” Taking down two glasses from the cabinet, she finished with just a hint of mockery, “I don't have any beer. So, do you want dish water or wine?”

 

Shuffling into the living room, Inuyasha couldn't help but grin. Had anyone else offered him dish water, he probably would've told her where she could go and what she could do once she got there. But this was Kagome, for some reason and for many reasons he didn't care to think about, he just couldn't treat her like all the rest.

 

Stepping up to the large picturesque window that overlooked the city, he retorted, “I'll take the dish water on ice if it's not too much trouble.”

 

Staring down at the city below and the red and white lights of what seemed like a million cars zipping by; the hanyou couldn't stop his mind from wandering back to his earlier argument with his sister-in-law.

 

What could she have been thinking? What would've led her to believe that it was okay for her to try to set him up with that woman? Of all the people that he confided in, she should've known better than anyone else that he wasn't ready!

 

Sure, it probably seemed as if he was jumping the gun, but think about it. That woman, Shaarione or Sorrieohna-whatever her name was-was not someone that he could've had a one night stand with and then dismiss carelessly. He couldn't have pretended to be interested in her because as soon as he showed his true colors, she'd be running to Rin crying and wailing her green eyes out about how he'd wronged her, and how would he have explained that?

 

`Rin will probably be upset with me for a few days, but I did the right thing regardless of how I did it,' he told himself. `She'll understand eventually and if she doesn't, I'll make her.'

 

“Do you always ignore your hostess?” Kagome questioned, stepping up behind him, one hand outstretched with a glass of wine for him to take.

 

“Huh?” the hanyou responded turning to face her. Truth be told, he hadn't heard a thing she said. Staring down at the glass of wine, he stated, a scowl on his face, “Didn't I ask for dish water? Besides, I thought I told you when we was in Hawaii that wine was a bitch's drink.”

 

“You said a lot of things in Hawaii. I'm still trying to figure out what was bullshit and what wasn't.” Smirking at her company as he stared at her with a dumbfounded look on his face, Kagome stepped up next to him and stared down at the street below.

 

“This is a view that I never get tired of,” she whispered more to herself than to him.

 

Turning his attention away from her and back down at the street below, the hanyou admitted, “It certainly makes it easy for you to lose yourself in it.”

 

Taking a sip from her glass, the newly relaxed young woman turned away from the window and took a seat on the couch.

 

“I'd like to say that I bought this place because of that view, but I can't. My firm bought it for me, so I guess you could say that I have them to thank for it.”

 

Following her, the hanyou sat one cushion down from her on the same couch, and commented as he glanced around the living room and into the kitchen, “I didn't know Law Firms did that, but I suppose when you find brilliance you do what you must to keep it.”

 

Staring at him, a gloating leer on her face, she queried, “Dog-boy, did you just give me a compliment?”

 

Looking as if he was replaying his previous words in his head, Inuyasha quipped, “No, I don't think that I did and stop calling me-“

 

“You can't take it back now, you already said it,” she interrupted, her tone melodious.

 

Chuckling lightly, Inuyasha set his glass down on the coffee table and sat back as he watched her take a sip from her glass and then shift so that she was sitting with one leg bent beneath her, the other one resting comfortably off the side of the couch.

 

`Higurashi Kagome, you really are something else,' he thought as he watched her put her drink down and brush her hands lightly over and down her ponytail.

 

Yes, there was something special about her. And every minute he spent with her seemed to drive that point home even more. That being said, knowing the frame of mind that he was in and had he had any kind of rational common sense, he would've been trying to distance himself from her instead of taking every chance that was given to him to see her…talk to her…be near her.

 

“Why were you so upset with Rin earlier?” Kagome asked, unknowingly interrupting his thoughts.

 

Sighing heavily, Inuyasha looked away from her. He didn't want to talk to her about this. He didn't want to rehash something that really had absolutely nothing to do with her, but everything to do with the reason why he was invited into her humble abode.

 

Running his hand down his face in an exasperated manner, he leaned back, allowing his head to relax against the plush cushions.

 

No, he wasn't ready to open up to her about his personal affairs, but how could he dissuade her without her feeling shut out or toyed with?

 

The hanyou blinked and stared up at the ceiling as a familiar, yet unwelcome feeling crept slowly up his spine.

 

`When did I start caring about her feelings?'

 

“You know, I really don't like being ignored,” Kagome declared as she poked him with the big toe of the foot that was previously dangling off the side of the couch.

 

She was by no means trying to flirt with him; this was simply her way of getting him to pay her a little more attention.

 

Glancing quickly at her and then back up at the ceiling, Inuyasha said softly, “I'm not ignoring you, woman. I'm just wondering if you got that nosey gene from your mother or your father.”

 

Poking him again with her toe, she countered with a light giggle, “I got it from my father. Now stop evading the question.”

 

Grabbing her bare foot before she could poke him again, Inuyasha held on to it as he replied without looking at her. “I don't know… I…I guess now that I think about it, it was pretty stupid. Or I could've at least handled it a little better.”

 

Staring at his hand that was grasping her foot gently, the befuddled young woman couldn't stop the blush that crept over her face as he lifted it and placed it in his lap.

 

`What is he doing? Does he know what he doing? Should I pull my foot back? Will he care if I pull it back?' she thought frantically as she watched him close his eyes once more. `Oh my god, he's rubbing my foot! Takahashi Inuyasha is rubbing my foot!' her thought finished as she felt the claws of his hand dig lightly into the tender flesh of the underside of her foot, causing her to inhale deeply.

 

Trying fruitlessly to block out the way his hand trailed slowly up and down the side of her flesh, the flabbergasted young woman, swallowed hard and stuttered, “How… How did you handle it? Wha…What did you do that was so stupid?” On reflex, her leg jerked slightly as he lightly grazed over her instep, which caused her to bite down on her lower lip as her eyes closed partially and her toes curled in his hand.

 

Lost in his own mind and oblivious to the fact that he was massaging her foot, Inuyasha began slowly, after realizing that he really didn't have a choice but to tell her what had happened, “I sort of yelled at her and stormed out.” Scratching his head with his free hand, he continued, feeling as if he needed to explain a little more, “I normally go over to Rin and Sesshomaru's house on Sundays for dinner and to spar with my brother. Anyway, today I didn't really feel like it, but I went anyway.”

 

Kagome was doing her best to listen, but his ministrations were making it a very hard thing to accomplish.

 

`I wonder how this would feel if he was truly paying attention. Better yet, what if it was my back, my thighs, or my…assssss,' she thought as the muscles in her thighs and private areas constricted sensually of their own accord, setting off light orgasmic bombs within her body. Shaking her head, she tried to force away her wanton thoughts and focus in on the man before her.

 

“When I got there…” he faltered, tried to find a way to reword what he was going to say, but fell short, so he continued, “When I got there, she had some chick she wanted me to meet.”

 

That got the seemingly entranced woman's attention. “She had someone for you to meet?”

 

“Yeah. Thinking about it now, it seems stupid, but back then I felt justified, you know?”

 

Leaning back, Kagome couldn't help but to go back to all of the blind dates that Sango had set her up on. She knew that all of the dates were set up because of the bet that they made, but that didn't stop her from feeling cheap or rather pimped out. It didn't stop her from feeling helpless and used, did it? However, this was not something that she was willing to bring up with him, at least not just yet.

 

“It's not like I can't meet women on my own. Shit, they practically throw themselves at me on a daily basis. I mean, fuck… When I go over there, it's to be with my family not to hook up with some fucking trick!” the hanyou finished, not really realizing just how much he'd actually said.

 

Staring at him, Kagome couldn't get her mind to move past the portion of his sentence about women throwing themselves at him. `I knew he was probably a man whore. I mean really! Look at him! Who wouldn't want him? Who wouldn't want just to be in his presence?'

 

Glancing at her for the first time in more than a few minutes, the hanyou added, “It's not only her, it's my secretary, Nya, too. Up and until a few weeks ago, every weekend she had some tramp she wanted me to meet.” Sitting forward, he picked up his glass of wine and took a quick sip, then finished, “I guess I never really expected Rin to do something like that; that's why I got so upset with her.”

 

Realizing that he had let her foot go, Kagome slowly pulled it back towards her. Shifting so that she was sitting on it, she queried, “Well, if you have women throwing themselves at you, why do they feel as if you need to be set up? It doesn't make sense. And why do they have to be tricks and tramps?”

 

She wasn't quite sure why she asked him that, but it was definitely too late to take it back now.

 

Setting his glass back down, the hanyou shifted uncomfortably as he answered, “Well, first, I suppose it's because I don't really take up any of those women on their offers. It just seems like such a waste of time, you know? And second, I haven't met a woman yet that hasn't turned out to be a trick or a tramp.”

 

Hearing those words fall from his lips, he knew how it probably sounded to her, and maybe it was a good thing. Maybe if she knew how he really felt about the female population, she would help him put a little more distance between them.

 

“All of them have been tricks or tramps? What kind of women have you been with?” she questioned out of curiosity.

 

“Doesn't really matter, does it? Eventually the truth always comes out.”

 

“And because of that, you don't take any of those women up on their offers to keep your bed warm?”

 

Nodding in agreement, the hanyou replied, “For the most part, yes.”

 

Sitting back, a condescending sneer on her face, Kagome avowed, “I find it hard to believe that you don't take any of those women up on their offer.”

 

“I said for the most part,” he clarified. Staring at her out the corner of his eye, he thought about what he'd just said. `What the fuck is she trying to get at?'

 

“I know men and men don't pass up free pussy.”

 

Inuyasha scowled at her, a little taken aback by her vulgar comment.

 

“Yeah, well I really don't care what you believe because the truth is the truth,” he affirmed bluntly.

 

Staring at him in disbelief, Kagome stood to her feet. “So, you expect me to believe that if I stripped down to my bare essentials you wouldn't want to get a little friendlier with me?”

 

Sitting forward, his elbows balanced on his knees, the hanyou responded mildly as he stared her, “That would be entrapment, wouldn't you say?”

 

“Regardless of what it is, would you want to get friendly with me?”

 

Staring at her, her hands grasping her hips lightly, Inuyasha lied, “No, I actually wouldn't. Do you want to test your theory?” he finished with a mischievous grin.

 

Rolling her eyes, Kagome sauntered off towards the kitchen, ignoring his comment all together. “Well, still, I find that hard to believe. I've seen men like you one too many times in my lifetime.”

 

Staring at her as she moved about her kitchen, the hanyou asked evenly, “Men like me? Didn't I already tell you that you've never-“

 

“Whatever,” she snapped, cutting him off.

 

If someone asked her outright why she was upset with him, Kagome wouldn't have been able to give them a direct answer. All she knew is that she felt like she needed to say something or do something so that he would know that she wasn't about to be fooled by his smooth, lying tongue.

 

Standing to his feet, Inuyasha questioned as he stepped towards the counter, “Do you have a problem with me? Because it damn sure seems like you do, Higurashi.”

 

Opening the cabinet above her stove, she pulled out two plastic wrapped bags then reached around and pulled down two bowls from another cabinet. “No, I actually don't have a problem with you, per se. I just have a serious problem with men thinking they can tell a woman what they want to hear just to get what they want from them.”

 

The hanyou thought that over. `What the hell is she talking about? What did I…' Chuckling lightly, he leaned across the counter and stared at her. “You think I just said what I said for your benefit?” Scoffing, he finished, “Talk about egotistical… What the hell do you think I want from you?”

 

“Well, from what you've stated in the past, you don't want anything from me, right?” she hissed as she filled her tea kettle with water and set it on the stove to boil.

 

“Damn right! Besides, if I wanted anything from you, I could've gotten it in Hawaii. You were damn near drunk the majority of the time!”

 

Kagome looked as if he'd just slapped her. “How dare you! I was not! Besides, wasn't it you who was all up on me?”

 

“You're delusional! You were the one that jumped in my bed with just your panties and a t-shirt on?”

 

“You know why I did that! You were taking pictures of me and for all I know, you still have them!”

 

Kissing his teeth, the hanyou turned away in order to hide the tell tale smirk on his face because he definitely did have a few of the more promiscuous pictures saved in his phone.

 

“I don't know what you're talking about,” he lied, the guilt in his voice not an easy thing to hide.

 

“Sure you don't,” Kagome bit out as she reached into one of the drawers in front of her and pulled out two sets of chop sticks. “And my name is Booboo the fool.”

 

Leaning forward, one hand outstretched for her to shake, Inuyasha retorted seriously, “Nice to meet you, Booboo.”

 

Smacking his hand away, she narrowed her eyes at him, and growled, “Gods, you're such an ass.”

 

“And you're such a bitch, but it doesn't change anything, now does it?”

 

The two adversaries stared at each other in silence as if they were challenging the other to a stare down.

 

`I can't believe he actually expects me to believe that line of bull crap!'

 

`Damn she looks sexy when she's mad.'

 

`He doesn't have to lie about it. It's not like we're in some kind of relationship or something. If he wants to take some woman home, then fuck, take her home, but don't fucking lie to me about it!'

 

`She has no fucking idea how fucking sexy she is, does she? She doesn't know that if she played her game right she could have me wrapped around her fucking finger…regardless of whether I wanted to be or not.'

 

Blinking, the hanyou shook off his thoughts and stated, “Seriously, why the hell are you mad at me? You asked me a question and I answered it and then you jump down my throat as if I did you wrong or something.”

 

It was Kagome's turn to kiss her teeth. “Yeah, I asked you a question, but you didn't tell me the truth. And lies, Inuyasha, are just one thing I don't have much of a tolerance for.”

 

“So, you assume that I'm lying because I don't claim to fuck any and everything with a wet hole?”

 

“You're a man. Of course you fuck any and everything with a wet or dry hole.”

 

“Really? So, if I stood here and told you that I fuck something different seven nights a week, you'd believe that because I'm a man?”

 

Crossing her arms beneath her perky breasts, her face set in a deep scowl, Kagome pursed her lips and waited for him to finish because she just knew that whatever he was about to say would be total trash.

 

“So then if I say that because you're a woman, you're also a conniving, two timing, two faced, gold digging, money hungry whore…that would be right too, right?”

 

Grasping her hips, she growled, “How dare you?”

 

“How dare you?” Inuyasha shot back. “You can't just assume shit about me and not expect me to do same to you!”

 

“But you don't know me!”

 

“And you don't know me! So stop trying to act like you fucking do!”

 

Stepping back away from him as the squeal of her tea kettle cut through the tension, Kagome tried to calm her frazzled nerves.

 

What did she think she was accomplishing by attacking him like that? They were friends and nothing more. If he said he didn't sleep with ten thousand women or even if he did, did it really matter…should it really matter? He owed her nothing…absolutely nothing!

 

`Sango is so right. I ruin everything with my cynicism. I can't believe I just attacked him like that. He's right… He's right; if I judge him then he has every right to judge me.' She knew she needed to apologize, but she had no clue how to begin; apologies just weren't her thing.

 

Removing the tea kettle from the stove, Kagome mumbled without looking at him, “I'm a serious baka aren't I?”

 

Realizing that she understood the point he was trying to make, Inuyasha stepped around the kitchen counter and stood closer to her as she quickly tore open the two plastic wrappers and dumped the contents into the bowls. “Yes ma'am, you are.”

 

Poking him with her elbow, she smiled, but still couldn't look at him. “It doesn't matter what you do in your free time, because we're friends right? We're just…friends.”

 

Staring at her, the hanyou swallowed hard as her words…her question swam through his mind. `We're just friends.' Allowing his eyes to trail slowly over her face and down her slim body, his thoughts continued, `Those lips, I'll never kiss. Those hips, I'll never caress. Those breasts, I'll never taste. Her warmth, I'll never embrace.'

 

He didn't have a clue as to why he did what he did next, but all he knew is that the urge to touch her…be closer to her was not something that we was able to fight at the moment.

 

Running the outside of one of his fingers down the side of her cheek, he stared at her, taking in every groove of her face, the almond shape of her eyes, the fullness of her lips, and the reluctant, yet wanton manner in which she leaned into his touch.

 

`Friends? I can't be your friend, Kagome,' he admitted truthfully to himself for the first time since he met her.

 

There was just something about her that dug deep into the crevices of his bones, his mind, and his thoughts. It threatened to devour him, to change him from the person he had become. It threatened to remake him…remold him in the image of what she wanted him to be.

 

Allowing the claw of his thumb to run gently over her cheek bone and down to her chin, he watched as her hands stilled over the pasta that she was preparing and her eyes closed on reflex.

 

`But I can't offer you anything other than that.'

 

Tracing the ball of his thumb over her perfectly arched eyebrows, his thought continued, `In another lifetime perhaps, we could've been so much more.'

 

Leaning in so that his nose was mere inches from her hair, he inhaled her scent and allowed it to find its place in his memories.

 

As he stepped back away from her, he realized that she had opened her eyes and she was staring at him with an expression that he'd never seen her wear before.

 

It called out to him. It pleaded with him to come a little closer. It told him that regardless of the words that fell from her lips, she needed him more than she'd ever needed anything or anyone in her life.

 

Smiling softly as he allowed his hand to drop away from her face, the hanyou stared back at her, begging her to read between the lines because he just wasn't strong enough to say the words that he needed to say.

 

As they stared at each other, neither flinching nor blinking in the quiet of her home as the music played softly about them, all animosity of the moments before were forgotten, all thoughts of jilted hearts and broken dreams were dismissed, leaving only Kagome and Inuyasha, human and hanyou, cynic and cynic, man and woman.

 

Like so many times before, he wanted to say no, they couldn't be friends, and like so many times before he failed.

 

“Whatever you want, Kagome, is fine with me,” he finally replied as he felt the first nail slip tightly into what he was sure was his coffin.

 

Until Next Time… (Your .02 cents are greatly appreciated!!)

 

Next Chapter: (Has not been written yet)

 

Acknowledgments

 

~Serenity Rose ~ tora92 ~ inuyashalover913 ~ 0xpeach_bear ~ olddog333 ~ Ro0tin4Kagome ~ silverwolfhalfbeast ~ cwillia ~ magedelbene ~ hopelessromantic 16 ~ InuyashaBaby Bre ~ szyszka ~ wbk ~ Tueske ~ InuGoddess715 ~ ScifiAmy ~ angel-up-above-heaven ~ mynera ~ loulou4729 ~ 1love1 ~