InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ I Am A Jelly Donut ❯ I Am A Jelly Donut ( Chapter 1 )
Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha, nor do I own the game they are playing.
One shot, here it goes:
(Warning: This story is complete nonsense. Anyone with a weak constitution please leave this page immediately. Oops to late, on with the story.)
Kagome hopped out of the well. She was carrying several slips of paper with her. Grandfather had told her about a game that was brought over by America. She hoped that it would lighten the mood. You see, during lunch break, she seemed to run out of her juice boxes that she would always serve with the ramen. Kagome didn't really feel like going back to her own time, at the moment, so she decided that it was the perfect opportunity to introduce her companions to her "coffee." Unfortunately, she didn't think the calculations through thoroughly.
Demons + Caffeine =
run in headfirst with the wall, and waking up to a serious hangover.
Now, Inuyasha AND Shippo were bitching about the tiniest things.
The "s" word was becoming extremely popular lately.
I mean, just after Shippo woke up, he started begging for candy. When Kagome told him she had none, he accused her of keeping it for herself, and said that she was getting fat because of it.
After turning as red as a tomato for a good half an hour, she remembered, it's just the caffeine.
It was Kagome's fault they were acting like this, so now she was going to fix it. She just knew the game would help, if only there were enough players.
Somehow, Sesshomaru, Kikyo, Koga, and Naraku all magically appear in front of her.
Wow, what a coincidence.
[ Sesshomaru: What the hell am I doing here? I was just getting a perm, and now I'm stuck with that crazed brother of mine and his wench.
Kouga: Hey! Don't call my woman a wench!
Kagome: Uhhh...in case you haven't noticed, I'm right here.
Sesshomaru: So...? ]
Anyhow, Kagome pulls out the slips of paper, and hands them to various "cast members."
"All right, the ones who have slips of paper are spies, states Kagome. You have been captured by the FBI over there."
"What the hell! I am not going to be captured by anyone!" ( In case you haven't guessed yet, that's Inuyasha)
"Sit! As I was saying, the FBI has captured you; it's like a law force. You have to make sure that no one guesses what your mission is. However, you do have to give clues to your mission. The FBI over there can ask you a question, and you have to respond with something related to your paper. For instance, if your mission were to say something stupid, you'd do just that. You can accuse someone of their mission at anytime, and you can ask any contestant a question."
[ Okay, so who's who?
Sesshomaru = spy
Naraku = spy (what did you expect)
Koga = spy
Miroku = spy
Kikyo = FBI
Shippo = FBI
Inuyasha = FBI
Sango = FBI
Kagome = Hostess ( where's the cream filling ) ]
"Well, let's get on with the game. Would you like to have the honor of starting the questions, Kikyo?" asks Kagome.
"Why I would love to. Okay, Sesshomaru-sama, how are you feeling today?" she asks.
"Ich bin ein Berliner." (I feel like a jelly donut)
"What the hell kind of answer was that?!"
"Sorry sweetie, one question at a time."
"I'm surprised no one guessed that, murmured Kagome. All right Shippo, your turn!"
"Just to tick him off, I think I'm going to ask Sesshomaru a question, again. So FLUFFY, what kind of demon are you exactly?" questioned Shippo.
"I am a demon of the highest rank. I come from the land of the sugar plum fairies."
*sweat drop*
"Oooookkkkkayyy," I'm never asking him a question again, muttered Shippo.
"Oh, oh I know!" Inuyasha is waving his hand frantically in the air. Sesshomaru is a pastry!"
"Close enough," Kagome pulls a lever beside her. Sesshomaru drops down through the unlatched door. The proper answer though is that Sesshomaru had to mention some type of food with each answer, I was just too eager to get rid of Sesshomaru. He was giving me the creeps. Oh yeah, Inuyasha, it's your turn to ask a question to one of our now three contestants."
"I thought they were spies."
"Yeah, I guess they are."
( Coming up next, who will Inuyasha ask a question to. What happened to the caffeine problem? When the hell will this game end? Continue on to find out! )
Commercial Break:
Announcer: Is it that time of the month again?
Inuyasha: Yep.
Announcer: Are you sick of feeling weaker during that time?
Inuyasha: Hell yeah!
Announcer: Disgusted for making a mess of yourself?
Inuyasha: Uhhhhhhhhh.
Announcer: Well no more of that!
Inuyasha: Yay!
Announcer: Introducing New Moon tampons, guaranteed to make your life stronger!
Inuyasha: What the fuck's a tampon?!
( Now back to our previous show )
"Hey wolf breath, I'll ask you a question. What the hell is with you and Ayame?" asks Inuyasha.
"That my friend is one I am not willing to answer," replies Koga while scratching the back of his head with his foot.
"You have fleas or something Koga," cries Shippo.
"No stupid, my mission is to scratch my self while answer……..shoot."
"Thank you Koga, starts Kagome, but I am afraid that now that you have given yourself away, you are disqualified."
Kagome pulls the lever, and down goes Koga.
"Sango, it is now your turn, choose the next victim MWAHAHAHA!"
"Kagome, your starting to scare me," Shippo whines in the corner of the room.
Sango glares at Miroku.
"Pervert, why do you always grope me?"
"Why would you ask me such a question my dear Sango?"
"Just answer the damn question houshi."
"But Sango, I did."
"That's it!"
*Sango starts pummeling Miroku into the ground*
"Miroku, I'm sooooooo going to kill you!" can be heard echoing throughout the village.
"Sango, I swear, I was just doing as the paper told me to. Must obey the paper!"
( Okay, guess this calls for another commercial break )
Commercial Break:
Announcer: Are you tired of always having to reapply your makeup in the morning?
Sesshomaru: I guess, sometimes I find it quite enjoya…
Announcer: Well now no more of that!
Sesshomaru: Am I supposed to be rejoicing?
Announcer: Come down to Joe's tattoo parlor and have it permanently put on!
Sesshomaru: And I care because?
Announcer: A free perm will also be given to the first ten customers!
Sesshomaru: Now that's what I'm talking about! *runs out the door in a rush*
Announcer: Oh almost forgot, caution: tattooing may permanently damage face. Symptoms include: burnt face, skin removal, and facial skin stretching
( Back to the show, I guess )
Now that Sango has had her needs fulfilled, and Miroku has left the building due to a concussion, we can continue on with our last victim.
"Kikyo, it is now your turn again to ask the question."
"Yo Naraku, what's up?" calls Kikyo.
"Not much ya'll, just feel like being nice to people for a change."
Inuyasha waves his hand frantically once again.
"I do believe I know the mission for this one," says Inuyasha…seriously?
"Due to the fact that Naraku has done so many evil things in the past, he can't possibly be telling the truth. I mean think about it, why all of a sudden, after killing so many people, would he decide to be nice to someone? Therefore in conclusion, Naraku's mission is to be lying am I correct?"
"Folks, I do believe we have a winner, yells Kagome. Not only have the FBI agents gotten rid of all the spies, but it also seems that Inuyasha has received smarts in the process!"
Kagome pulls the lever, once again, and Naraku vanishes.
Announcer:
"Well that's all viewers, please keep on the lookout for the next episode of , "I Am A Jelly Donut!"
AN: So watcha all think? If I get plenty of reviews, I just might make another episode of "I Am A Jelly Donut."
( I hope all of those who had a weak constitution left, otherwise, you're probably writhing on the floor like worms by now. Oh well! )