InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Illumination ❯ There Will Always Be Darkness ( Chapter 5 )
[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]
Chapter 5: There Will Always Be Darkness
Throughout the rest of that day, Kagome watched Sesshoumaru, stunned by his behavior. He was completely different than she'd ever have thought him to be. Now that all the fighting and business of the jewel and Naraku was done, she actually had the time to pay attention to things... and what she was seeing went beyond anything she'd ever have thought to see from the – normally – cold lord.
Or is this his normal behavior when alone with those he cares for, and his ice and disdain, his rage, only for those he doesn't care for? The only way she could really answer that without directly asking, was by watching Jaken – and that answered her question quite nicely, as the toad was just as stunned by this new Sesshoumaru as she was.
Apparently, he had changed – and quite quickly, too.
The most telling behavior came in his treatment of Inuyasha.
While he did not appear to pay too much attention to him, or at least, not any more than he did to any of the children, there was no rage, no disdain, no hatred... no negativity of any kind towards the child. When he did speak to the boy, there was a simple quiet command in his voice like there was with everyone else.
He treated him the same as he treated Rin, and Shippo.
Oh, it was more than apparent that Sesshoumaru was still just as dangerous as he had ever been. Any threat to what was his was treated with the same deadly response, as they found mid-way through the day when an oni attacked. But he was warmer with those under his protection, than he had ever been before. Just the word protection, in reference to Sesshoumaru, was strange. He had always before denied protecting anything.
Now he did not – and just that one fact was a major spectrum shift within the soul of the daiyoukai.
It was becoming apparent that her light did more than just 'illuminate' a youkai's dark soul.
Things, as her mother had often said, always looked different in the light of day, but Kagome had always just shrugged that saying off, taking it as just that – a saying. But as that day wore on, and more just like it, as well, she began to see that the idea behind the saying – that things, once illuminated, changed – was true.
Her light was changing Sesshoumaru, slowly but surely. But how much would he actually change?
She couldn't help but wonder what he would be once he had finished changing... if there was such a thing as 'finishing'.
Still, it was apparent that Sesshoumaru wasn't the only one changing, as Shippo began to act a bit more like his new role-model, becoming a bit more reserved, and a little more serious as time went on, and days turned into weeks, then into months. Inuyasha did as well; though he didn't interact directly with his brother very often, obviously still very distrustful of anyone – other than Kagome – he did begin to emulate the adult inu a bit as time passed, and she couldn't help but find it cute.
This is how it should have been the first time around, she thought. But at least... at least now, it is. That's better than nothing.
Kagome herself seemed to be having the most trouble adjusting to all the changes. After all, though she'd been dealing with this era for some time, it had been on a part time basis. She had always had the option of going home – but now she did not. It made a huge difference, she was finding. Add to that, Sesshoumaru's wandering nature, dealing with three children on a constant basis, and the lack of anyplace to truly call home, and Kagome was an uncomfortable young woman.
That fact was not missed by her powerful mate.
Sesshoumaru had never before considered the need for a place to call home. He had wandered all of his adult life, seeking the Tessaiga and supreme conquest with equal facility. A home had been nothing he'd needed – then. Now, however, he considered as he sat back against a boulder in their latest camp, it was something he would have to look into. His priorities were different, now, and with that, came new and different responsibilities.
Inwardly, he could not help but growl lightly at what he was becoming. He knew, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that once he finally did pass on, the first being he would see on the other side would be his sire – who would then spend the rest of eternity gloating. It was not something he looked forward to...
But the reason his father would have to gloat was so very worth it, and he would never give her up now, even if he could have. He had never known what it was to be content with what he had – before, he had always striven to be more, to do more, to prove himself the pinnacle of youkai potential. But because of that, he had never known the simple concept of peace.
Once upon a time, he would have scoffed at anyone bringing that lack to his attention. He was the killing perfection, the aristocratic assassin, the destruction of the circle of life. What need had he for peace, a concept which his very name denied?
Looking back, he had been a fool, and he could admit that – at least, within the sanctity of his own mind. It would never be something he said aloud, of course.
Still, all of that to say that he needed to provide what his little mate required, and that was a home.
Now, he could have found an easy out by simply taking up residence in one of the many caves that dotted the landscape of the Western Lands. But he was well aware of the fact that his wife was used to the luxuries that her advanced time gave her, though he didn't know specifics, of course, and making her live in a dank cave would have made him no better than Koga, who also lived in a cave.
Primitive, and not up to his standards as a Lord, and, more importantly, a very wealthy Lord. So that would obviously not do. Especially as even the highest of luxuries of his time would likely seem somewhat primitive to Kagome.
No... it was time to build himself a home. And it would be a home fitting for the wife of the Western Lord, of that he was determined – nothing but the best would do. His glance fell on Rin, and he almost smiled inwardly – these accommodations would also have to have extensive gardens, or the girl would be sneaking off to find fields of flowers every time they turned around. And a dojo... for training the kitsune, Inuyasha, and any children he did conceive with his little miko mate.
That thought, as it always did, made his loins tighten uncomfortably, and he wryly thought about the fact that this new home would definitely need an extensive nursery – and family wing. His need for his mate had not subsided, nor had it even lessened slightly in all the months that he'd had her – he still wanted her with an intensity that had, at first, surprised him.
It also, he'd noticed, surprised her.
Despite the things he'd told her of inu, and inu nature, she still seemed to be waiting for the day he decided he no longer wanted her. In fact, the kitsune had let slip one day that he'd overheard her worrying to herself – apparently, she thought that someday, he would tire of her, and would take another female on the side... and for some reason, she thought that Kagura would be that female.
The thought made him look over at his mate; deciding that now was a good time, he crooked his finger at her, beckoning her to his side, then stood and, without a word of explanation, led her from the camp with only a threat to Jaken to watch over what he considered precious.
Once far enough out of camp for their discussion to remain private, he turned and faced her, watching her silently for a few moments as he took in her natural beauty. With the breeze lifting her ebon locks around her, and the questioning light in gorgeous azure eyes that were lit from within, as always, by her brilliant soul, he wondered why she would worry over such a foolish thing.
“Why would this one ever leave his mate to take Kagura as a concubine? She could never bring him the pleasure that you do,” he said bluntly, knowing she would be shocked at his conversational gambit.
She was, her eyes widening impossibly. “H-how did you k-know?” she stuttered out, her aura swirling around her in consternation.
He reached up to his shoulder with one hand, loosening the ties holding his armor on and stepping around it as it crashed to the ground. Easily, naturally, he pulled her into his arms, resting her head on his chest as he ran his hand soothingly through her midnight hair, he crooned wordlessly to her for a small time to calm her shock. Once she had calmed down enough, he pulled back just enough to see her face and cupped her chin in one hand, tilting her blushing visage to meet his eyes.
“I pay attention, Kagome. Do you think I have not noticed Kagura's occasional presence? You fear needlessly, however. I have absolutely no attraction to her – nor indeed any other, save you.” He eyed her for a moment, and then sighed, leaning down to kiss her tenderly. “Do you question my honor, or just my seeming lack of what you call emotion?” he asked after pulling back to let her breathe, inwardly pleased at the dazed look in her eyes. They sharpened very quickly on hearing his question, however.
“No! I know you have honor, Sesshoumaru,” she said, vehemently. “But... I want you to be happy, and what happens if later you meet someone and fall in love? Then you'll be stuck with me... and I don't want that. It would make me very unhappy to be the cause of your misery,” she admitted shyly, looking away with a blush as she realized what she was giving away with her words.
She couldn't help it. It had been months since he'd claimed her in that cave, and slowly, but surely, she'd fallen in love with the quiet, controlled, but – in her opinion – perfect male. He was honorable, protective, caring, and not least of all, absolutely gorgeous – how could she not fall in love with him? He treated her as though she were the most precious thing that had ever been created, and she hadn't realized how starved for that kind of caring she really was.
And now she was afraid to lose it.
Kagura hadn't ever hidden how she felt about the daiyoukai, and at least in Kagome's eyes, she was much the better match for someone of Sesshoumaru's power. She was, at least, a full youkai, something Kagome was not, and never would be.
The female youkai came near on a frequent basis, probably hoping that which Kagome feared would actually come to pass – even if he couldn't actually mate her because Kagome was already his mate, apparently Kagura was willing for him to take her as a concubine if that was all he could offer.
She was stunned to hear him beckon to Kagura as he let her go to step back from him awkwardly as the kaze youkai drifted into the little glade on her feather cautiously.
He held his mates gaze, however, watching her face closely as Kagura approached. After studying her for several long moments, he finally looked over at Kagura and held her longing gaze.
“You remain nearby wherever we travel after I told you after Naraku's death to leave. Why?”
Kagura held his gaze proudly. “I wait for you to come to your senses and realize what I could be to you. I know she is your mate, and that cannot be changed, but I can be your concubine, and love you as you should be loved. I can also give you a proper heir – one with no trace of human blood,” she replied, not even looking at Kagome.
“You wait in vain,” he told her bluntly. “I will never take another to my bed, nor will I ever pup one who is not my mate.”
Kagura snarled at that. “Perhaps, then, the miko will meet with an accident, and then she will no longer be your mate!”
Kagome tensed at the kaze's words, but Sesshoumaru stood before her protectively, making it quite clear that no harm would be allowed to be visited upon her.
“I sometimes forget that you are a created youkai,” he finally said, his eyes narrowed as he considered the kaze. “She is my mate – that does not end at death. Were she to die, still, she would remain my mate, and I would never take another. I could not, even if I wanted to, which I would not. What I said before still stands, Kagura – go, take your freedom, and find a life for yourself. Whatever life you choose will never include this one, so do not let me catch your presence anywhere near myself or my mate again. If I do, I will consider it an act of aggression, and will kill you without further warning.”
With that said, he waited, blatantly expecting her to leave. With a pale, angry, yet hurt expression, she glared at Kagome, and then left in a swirl of wind and autumn leaves as Kagome watched her sadly.
She knew all too well what it was like to be rejected for another.
Silence fell for a few minutes as Kagome took in what had happened, and Sesshoumaru allowed her to.
Then... “Do you still fear I will take another to my bed, mate?”
Taking a deep breath of the crisp, clear air of fall, Kagome held it, and then expelled it deeply, wondering how to explain herself. It wasn't as easy as he made it sound, to dismiss her fears...
“I... believe that you are being honest about how you see things... but no one knows the future, Sesshoumaru,” she finally stated quietly. “If not Kagura, then there could be someone else... someone that you meet, and suddenly, you want nothing more than to spend forever with them, and fear them being taken away from you with everything you are.” She ran her hands down her hakama covered thighs, nervousness making her hands damp as she waited for him to speak.
He watched her for a few moments, admittedly a bit perturbed at her severe disbelief in herself – he was fully aware that she wasn't questioning him – it was herself she didn't have faith in.
“And have you never considered that I have already found that person in you? Do you think I would have chosen to mate you if I did not already wish to spend forever with you? After all, that is just what a mating ensures, does it not? Literally forever, as we will remain together even in death,” he said, noting her surprised expression. “And would I bother to protect you if I did not fear you being taken from me?”
It was obvious that she had never considered that, her expression completely stunned as she stared at him. But it was also obvious that his words were sinking in; he could see the thoughts he had inspired through her expressive eyes.
After a few minutes of watching her, he once more pulled her into his arms, stroking her hair as he nuzzled into the fragrant locks, his eyes closing at the familiar, and quite beloved, scent. “You fear that I do not feel emotion as you do – and in some ways, you are correct. Most humans seem to feel emotions fleetingly, as I believe I have pointed out before. Youkai are not the same. Any emotion we do feel is deeply held, and lasts for eternity. That is how I can assure you that I will never take another. You are the one I have chosen to bind myself to, in life and in death. Is that not the ultimate definition of the emotion you call love?” he asked softly, feeling her stiffen in shock as her breathing hitched.
She pulled back to look at him, and he allowed it, dropping his usual mask, he let her see what she needed in his eyes, everything she inspired in him echoing loudly there for her to see.
Tears filled her eyes as she held his; she'd never seen such an intense look from anyone before, and it completely overwhelmed her. It was all there, everything she'd ever wanted to see, and it was all for her.
It literally left her breathless.
He seemed to understand, instead of speaking, he simply bent to softly lick her tears from her cheeks, and with a barely-there sigh, her eyes closed as she submitted to his ministrations. After a few minutes of that, she managed to get her emotions under control enough; eyes flickering open once more, she locked her gaze with his, her own now showing the same intensity his had as she said, “I love you, too, Sesshoumaru,” her voice so low it was almost a whisper.
His eyes flared with triumph as he heard her words – he'd been almost positive the depths of his own feelings had been returned, but not completely certain, by any means. Now, though, he was.
Considering her almost longingly, he smiled slightly as he began to disrobe, leaving her in no uncertainty of his desires as she flushed most becomingly.
“I believe it is time to pup my mate, now instead of in a year or two,” he said slowly, eyeing her sweet form with passionate need clouding his expression. “I have waited long enough.”
Kagome blinked, startled. “W-what?” she asked. “You mean, you've been deliberately waiting?” She seemed quite surprised.
Down to his hakama, which were riding dangerously low on his hips, he smiled predatorially at her as he stepped forward to begin assisting her out of her own clothes. “Of course. It is the male who determines when conception of a pup is desired. You had much to deal with after I claimed you, not the least of which was learning to deal with the several pups we already have. I did not wish to overburden you with another.” He caressed each part of her as it was uncovered, and Kagome quickly lost her thoughts to passion.
“But I think you are ready, little mate,” he whispered as he lowered her to his pelt, enjoying the visual of her spread out before him and welcoming his attentions. “And the timing is certainly appropriate, as you are just coming in to your fertile period.”
“Oh,” she whispered back, unable to speak any louder as his need pressed heatedly into her thigh. “So you want us to have a... baby... now?”
“I wish to see my female swell with my seed, to watch as your body grows to accommodate the life we create together. I want to see the pup we create, what he will look like, how his personality will develop.” He nuzzled into her neck as his breath brushed hotly over her flesh; Kagome's whole body shivered at that, and at his words. She could feel her body preparing itself for his possession just from them alone. “I desire to make a pup with you, it is not a desire for a child that drives me, but a desire to create a life from both of us, little mate.”
He trailed kisses down her neck and across her collarbone as he spoke, biting down gently along the bone and drawing another shiver from her and a soft moan as he moved. “A precious life born of my passion for my mate; is there anything more beautiful than that?” he asked. She shook her head as his lips circled a nipple, gasping as his words and actions inflamed her body beyond anything she'd ever known.
“S-sesshoumaru,” she whimpered, her mind a blank as his heated caresses stole her thoughts. “Please,” she begged, tilting her hips into his – she didn't need foreplay, she was more ready than she'd ever been for him, her body welcoming his every touch, every soft caress as desire weakened her knees – it was a good thing they were already lying down.
“Shhh, little one. Let me love you as I wish to,” he said, exhaling over her now wet nipple, satisfaction surging inside him as she arched into him and choked out her submission to his desires. “You are so beautiful, Kagome – there is not another like you in all of creation.” Sweet moans and whimpers followed his words and his path down her heated body as she writhed beneath him, every part of her engaged by him in this encounter - heart, body, and soul.
Sesshoumaru was not proof against her little exclamations of need and love, every word she managed to utter fired his desire until he was literally in pain from the tightness of his flesh against her. In some ways, he wished that there was a way that she could see inside his mind, and actually feel his emotions when it came to her – it would dispel a great deal of her unnecessary fears.
He was not like his father at all... no, he loved only one, and he mated only one. He would never dishonor her or himself in seeking another, she was all he could ever want, the beginning and end of his desires and emotions.
She had illuminated them, finding them buried in the darkness of his soul, bringing them to vivid life, and were she to disappear from his life, she would also be the end of them – without her, his heart had no desire to continue living, and would wither and die in painful misery.
He did his best to show her that through his loving, just as he would through the way he cared for her in everyday life. He wanted her to know what she meant to him without doubt, though he was not one to speak of his emotions, nor name them. That didn't mean that they weren't there, however, not by a long shot.
Yes, it was most certainly time to pup his little mate, and begin to build a full family with her – not just an adopted one.
She was ready now, and so was he.
~oOo~
As with most things that Sesshoumaru put his mind to, it wasn't long before it was obvious to him that his wife was, indeed, expecting their first pup, and with that, his drive to have an acceptable home built before the birth of the pup became a top priority.
Gathering the best and most skilled builders in the west, and making sure that only the finest materials were used in the dwelling he was creating, Sesshoumaru became almost a slave driver, making certain that the house went up quickly, but thoroughly.
Kagome, of course, had no idea; he wanted to surprise her when the time came, and also with news of her pregnancy.
In the meantime, they had stopped moving around quite so much, staying in one general area, Sesshoumaru not wanting to strain his now pregnant female with too much traveling. The chance to settle down, even if it was outside in the great wide open, seemed to perk her up, and he felt a small bit of guilt that he had not noticed sooner that his wife was wanting a place to call home.
Before the place was completed, however, he wanted to check in at the village, and let his mate get a chance to see her friends before winter set in. Once her pregnancy advanced, he would not be letting her out to traipse the countryside until she'd whelped, so he knew it would be at least late next spring before he'd be willing to let his wife and firstborn out of the palace to visit again.
The visit went well, things going smoothly in the village with the protection of a monk, miko, and two taijiya against plundering youkai, not to mention the same against any human bandits. It also helped that the village was known to be under his eye, so most with any brains stayed away.
The palace, for so it could indeed be called, was finally finished just before winter truly set in, and calling together those loyal servants of his father's who still lived, he soon had the place staffed, and then it was time to take his wife to their new home for the first time. He could hardly wait to see her reaction.
Kagome was, in a word, stunned.
Sure, she knew Sesshoumaru was a Lord, and she also knew he was wealthy. But... a palace? She should have expected it, really. But what caught her attention the most was that he'd done it for her – because he'd noticed that she really wanted a home, someplace to go back to when the journeys got tiring.
“You did this because you knew I missed having a home, didn't you?” she asked later that night when they were finally alone in their new quarters, a soft, melting look in her eyes, though she was a bit nervous that it was a palace.
“That was one reason, but there was another, more personal reason,” he said slowly, moving towards her and tilting her chin up to look into her face. “You are pregnant, mate, and I'd not have you whelping our pup out in the wilds,” he finished, almost smiling at her shocked expression.
“P-pregnant?” she stumbled, almost as though the word didn't want to come out right. She'd known her period hadn't appeared, of course, but she'd always been irregular, so that didn't really tell her anything.
At that, he did chuckle, just slightly. “Yes. Was that not what I told you I wanted? I usually get what I desire. You are approximately three months along, and will whelp in another four,” he said. “If you noticed, I made the family wing quite large - there will be more where this one comes from.” He put a tender hand to her belly, looking down to watch himself caress the place their child lay curled safely within her womb.
Softly flushed, Kagome stared down at his hand on her belly in wonder; it was so hard to imagine herself as pregnant! She was about to be someone's mother... and not just by adoption. It was a very scary realization...
“But what if I'm not a good mother?” she asked, suddenly panicking. “I mean, its different than just taking care of Rin, Shippo, and Inuyasha! I'm still so young, what if I mess this up?”
He put a finger to her lips, looking down at her with an indulgent expression on his face. “Kagome,” he said, “calm down. You have more than proven yourself as a parent with the three we already care for. Do you think your instincts will be any weaker with one that is truly yours? You will be fine – if I did not believe you capable of it, I would never have gifted you with my fertile seed.”
Her blush deepened to scalding at his provocative words, but looking up into his eyes, she couldn't bring herself to argue. He wouldn't have gotten her pregnant if he didn't believe she could handle it, and she knew that. If he was so certain of her, then she should just calm down and not worry about it, because Sesshoumaru was rarely wrong about anything.
She smiled shyly against his finger and kissed it; he moved his finger and replaced it with his lips, instead, and she moaned low in her throat at the tender caress. As far as she was concerned, he could kiss her anytime he wanted, he was soo damn good at it. There was nothing like his touch...
He responded to her moan with a soft growl, the vibrations passing from his lips to hers and making her press to him more fully to feel him better. One hand went to the nape of her neck to tilt her head, the other going to cup her chin as he deepened the kiss even more, moving slowly and exploring every inch of her mouth as though he'd never kissed her before.
It was always like this; every time he touched her was just like the first time, the intensity, the heat, the feeling of it. When he was with her like this, she knew without a doubt that she was the only thing on his mind – he gave all of his attention to the task of making love to her, and she responded to that by opening all of herself to him.
Most times, now, she could barely remember that she'd ever been in love with anyone else, and looking back, she knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that she really hadn't been. What she'd felt for Inuyasha had been puppy love, the love of a still immature girl for an equally immature boy.
This was nothing like that.
This was the love of a woman for a man, an adult love, a complete love, and she would never now be able to look back on the things that had happened with regret – she was too happy. Even the well closing – while it had hurt, and she missed her family, she was actually thankful now that Naraku had done whatever it was that he had done to close it, because she couldn't imagine living without the magnificent male that had taken her as his own... and meant it.
She wasn't a replacement for someone else, wasn't needed to find shards of a sacred jewel for him. He simply wanted her, as she was, and with everything she'd been through, she certainly needed that kind of caring.
He'd given it, too, without question. Not once since they'd been together had he ever actually said the words, but his actions told her every day that he felt that way, even if he never said it.
But... she'd only said it once, herself, and she felt that perhaps it was time to do so again. After all, she wasn't him. It wasn't really in Sesshoumaru's personality to speak of such personal things as emotions, but, she, Kagome, was different. She was the type to speak of such things, at least to the other person involved, and she shouldn't let the fact that he had never said the words hold her back from saying them herself, and frequently.
So it was that as Sesshoumaru pulled back from the kiss to let her breathe finally, his gaze taking in the long dark lashes laying smudged against her cheeks, she opened her eyes and met his with a smile, and said, “I love you, Sesshoumaru.”
Simply said, merely four words, but to the daiyoukai listening, they were the sweetest ones the language contained. He hadn't forgotten he and his mates discussion about inuyoukai and how mates were treated, and her definition of love, nor the one and only other time she'd said it.
With a hoarse groan, he swooped down to take her mouth again, trying to show his intense feelings for her in the sweet contact between their lips by pouring every bit of his passion into the kiss.
For endless minutes he kissed her, his mouth sweetly greedy as he attempted to take all of her sweetness for himself, and she answered him back with as much passion as he invested into the kiss, returning it all to him with interest.
Finally, breaking away from her and breathing heavily, he drew his mouth across her cheek and down the curve of her jaw to her neck, nibbling, licking, and suckling at her tender flesh as she dropped her head back, submitting quite happily to the touch of her lover as she moaned, groaned, whimpered and even whined in reaction to his ministrations.
Gods, he thought almost dazedly, does she have any idea what those sounds are doing to me? Probably not... he decided that maybe he should tell her.
Still nuzzling into the flesh of her neck, he murmured, “Do you know what the sounds you make do to me, woman? When I touch you... just like this,” he cupped a breast, his touch deft, sensuous, “and you moan, just like that?”
He shivered, and she felt it, a smile crossing her plump, swollen lips. “It's only fair,” she gasped out after a moment, as he nipped at her, “since you do the same things to me when you make those sounds of enjoyment, you know.”
“Hn,” he sighed, still nuzzling her. He'd worked his way around to the nape of her neck, so soft, so fragrant, brushing her raven tresses over her shoulder in the process. His eyes fell closed in enjoyment as she trembled and gasped. She just smelled so good.
She shivered as large hands wrapped around her upper arms and held her in place as he nipped her neck – she had developed a rather extensive fixation with his fangs, and loved it when he used them on her just the way he was doing now. He seemed to know it, too, and took every advantage he could.
Nudging the collar of her yukata down with his nose, he reached down and untied the small belt holding it closed, then slid the garment off of her, enjoying the puff of her scent the small breeze it caused as it fell sent towards him.
Now naked, Kagome let her head fall forward as he continued his attentions to her nape and shoulders, just enjoying his touch. Somehow, and she had no idea how he did it, his touch was both soothing and arousing, and the combination of feelings made her knees go weak.
Sesshoumaru growled low in his chest as her knees went out from under her, swinging her up into his arms and carrying her to the bed, where he placed her gently down, and then began to divest himself of his own garments, watching her watch him all the while.
He enjoyed the blush on her cheeks – even all these months later she still got so sweetly embarrassed when he stripped, though it didn't stop her from looking. And enjoying. Her scent always spiked so deliciously as he dropped his clothes. He loved it – and of course, his nudity didn't bother him a bit – he knew his body was perfection, and so saw no need to be embarrassed. She really shouldn't be, either, especially about her own body, though he knew she was still shy about being totally nude around him, too.
She just hid it a little better than she did her reaction to his nudity.
Wasting no time in crawling up the bed after her once his clothes were gone, he pulled her down beneath him as he positioned himself over her, and noting by scent that she needed no real foreplay, he simply thrust forward, taking her willing body over from the inside out as she gasped, shocked, yet overwhelmingly aroused.
He immediately set up a strong rhythm, such a passionate fire in his blood for her that he could not hold himself back. Every part of her, from her hazy blue eyes that were drooping, to the flushed cheeks contrasting so beautifully with the dark smudges of her lashes laying against them, to the swollen lips he loved so much, her perfect breasts and shapely figure – all of it just strangled his control and destroyed it, leaving him aching for her.
There was no reason to deny himself, either, and so he did not, taking her hard and fast to the very heights of passion and poising her there as she cried out, arching into him and begging for her release. He gave it to her... he could never deny her this, would never want to, and as she tumbled over the edge into chaotic pleasure, he followed, once again forced over the edge quickly in their first round of bed-play. He'd been quite correct in thinking that if he wanted a long round, it would have to be as a secondary encounter, because the first time he was always too impassioned to hold back.
That hadn't changed at all, no matter how many times he'd taken her, and he had by now realized that it never would. He just wanted her too much to ever resist.
As they both came back down, he rolled onto his side so as not to put too much weight on her, slowly allowing his body to cool and his breathing to calm, just as hers did. After a little while of silence, he looked over at her, thinking about initiating that second encounter, only to chuckle slightly at the sight of her, completely asleep and peaceful at it.
With a sigh, he pulled her to him, settling her comfortably against his body, and allowed himself to also drift off to the relaxing sound of her breathing.
Apparently, he would have to wait 'til later to have her again...
But that was acceptable. After all, she now carried their pup, and would undoubtedly tire more easily. The loss of multiple encounters a night was worth it, as far as he was concerned.
They could certainly be made up for at another time.
~oOo~
Kagome frowned uneasily, placing a protective hand over her now swollen abdomen as she came to a stop; she'd been getting odd feelings in the last week – feelings of hatred that were very directed at her, Inuyasha and Rin, specifically. There was no hostility aimed at Shippo, however, and that gave the truth away to the little miko – someone here in the palace hated her and Rin's humanity, and Inuyasha's, as well.
She didn't, however, know how to bring it up to Sesshoumaru. After all, every person here had been loyal to his father at one point, and he had hand-picked them himself to serve in their new home just a few months ago. She didn't want to upset him by making him think she didn't trust his judgment.
Looking back over her shoulder, her feelings of uneasiness increased, and she started moving again, hurrying back towards the family's wing. She couldn't see anyone, but she could certainly feel that she was being watched with hostile intentions, and wanted to get out of the very empty corridor as soon as possible.
By the time she reached the main gathering room in the family wing where the children were, she was almost out of breath from running as fast as she could, and she slid the door open and raced inside before sliding it closed behind her – whoever was out there was not stopping this time, and for some reason, no servants were to be seen anywhere.
That fact frightened her – it could mean nothing good.
She backed away from the doors, her eyes peeled to them as a shadow made itself known against them, and with the children rushing up to her in a panic, she pushed them behind her as the door slid slowly open.
“Stay behind me, Inuyasha, Rin. Shippo,” she whispered urgently, “go find Sesshoumaru, now!” She whipped around hurriedly and pushed him towards the doors into the garden, along with Inuyasha and the now-terrified Rin, then turned back to face their stalker as the children burst through the doors into the garden and scattered.
When the door opened fully and revealed who it was, Kagome's heart broke for her beloved husband – he would be very angry when he found out who was responsible for the attack she could tell was about to come. The only thing she could do was run into the garden herself, gather Rin and Inuyasha, and put up a barrier, which she could hopefully hold until her mate arrived.
Unfortunately, the pup growing within her was wearing her down, and she had not had much energy lately; she knew she wouldn't be able to hold it through more than a few blows.
Running outside, she ignored the older inu male's snarl, determined to reach the children before anything could harm them. She found them quickly, their fear giving them away, and drawing her energy up around herself, watched as Yori, Sesshoumaru's most trusted servant, stalked her into the gardens with a look of hatred and revulsion on his face.
She shook her head, tears running down her cheeks as she watched him move towards her barrier. Hurry, Shippo! “Why, Yori? Why are you doing this?” she asked despairingly, clutching the frightened children to her as her own heart pounded with fear for them and her unborn child.
The male snarled at her, red bleeding into his silver eyes. “Because you are a filthy human, wench! I watched my Lord Inu no Taisho fall from his position of respect, power, and honor into an ignoble death because of a miserable human female, and that weak bratling clutching at your legs,” he gestured with disdain at Inuyasha, who growled at him, baring his little fangs, “and I will not watch the same happen to my Lord Sesshoumaru. I will destroy the weakness you three bring to this house!” He attacked her barrier, then, and Kagome slipped to her knees as it shuddered under his blows, her energy weakening. She hugged the two children to her for a moment and then pushed them away. “Get behind me, both of you,” she managed to get out, “and when the barrier falls, run!”
The barrier shuddered once more and then went down as she slipped further to the ground before the half-feral inuyoukai, and the children ran, Rin dragging Inuyasha behind her as the boy tried to stay back and protect Kagome. With no energy left to fight the male, she could do little more than curl up protectively around her abdomen as she was lifted and flung against the walls of the garden, everything going dark as she impacted against it and pain flashed through her mind.
Sesshoumaru was in the main audience hall speaking to the servants; his most trusted retainer besides Jaken had come to him that morning and informed him that there was a threat to his wife from someone in the palace, and he immediately pulled all the servants into the great room to speak to them and find out who it was that would dare to threaten what was his.
But he was left with an uneasy frown when not one of the servants in the room were found to be carrying any hint of malice towards his mate. If they had been, with his questions, their scent would have given them away immediately. “Jaken.”
The little toad scrambled to bow before his master. “Hai, Sesshoumaru-sama?”
“Where is Yori?” he asked slowly, as he suddenly realized that he could not feel the male's youki anywhere in the palace.
“I am not certain, my Lord, but I will go look for him!” the gami announced, and as Sesshoumaru nodded at him, he scrambled out of the room as the servants all looked on in confusion, not understanding what was going on.
Just moments after Jaken disappeared, however, the daiyouikai felt Shippo's youki racing towards him full of terror and worry, and he turned on his heel to face the door as the little kitsune burst into the room in a full-blown panic.
“Sesshoumaru!” he cried out, too panicked to worry about honorifics; the daiyoukai certainly didn't care in that moment, knowing his worst fears were about to be realized.
“Where?” he snapped, his whole body tensing.
“The family gardens! You have to help her!” Shippo screamed; Sesshoumaru didn't even wait for him to finish - he was out of the room and gone before the first words died away.
The scene he arrived to find would forever be burned into his memory; his beautiful wife flying through the air only to impact against the privacy wall around the garden with a loud thud, then fall to the ground limply. She didn't move again.
With a roar of sheer rage, he turned to the one who had attacked her, and hatred bled into his eyes as he realized the extent of the betrayal.
“Yori,” he spat, landing between his wife's body and the crying children and the inu he'd trusted. “You will die here today – I care not for your reasons. Prepare yourself for the death given to those who betray their Lords,” he bit out. His eyes never leaving the inu now crouched across from him, he ordered the servants who had followed him to take his mate to their chambers and call for the healers, and to get the children out of the garden, as well.
As soon as his wife and the children were out of the way, he moved, not sparing another word to the traitor; he simply attacked, planning to kill him in the most painful way possible – and the slowest.
The battle lasted mere moments, the other was a simple servant, not a warrior, and with the entrance of Sesshoumaru's poison into his body, he became unable to move quite quickly as the poisons began to eat at him slowly from the inside out.
Sesshoumaru stood above the fallen inu, hands still clawed as blood dripped from the sharp tips, his markings jagged and eyes feral. He lifted one hand, and not breaking the other male's pained gaze, licked the blood from his claws with every evidence of enjoyment. The great daiyoukai might have softened towards his wife and the children somewhat, but the fierce, dark warrior was still there underneath – and he'd just proved it.
When the inu lay, stiff and still on the ground, Sesshoumaru ordered the two servants still outside with him to stand guard as the male's insides slowly rotted away, the aura of agonizing pain from him impossible to ignore, and then rushed to his chambers to see to his mate. His blood was heated, hatred for the one who had harmed his wife running high within him, and he needed to see her, to be with her, to make sure she was going to be alright.
Because if she wasn't... if he had to use Tenseiga to bring her back to him, he would revive Yori, and then throw him in the dungeon and torture him to death even more slowly the second time around.
Sweeping into his chambers, his eyes went immediately to the bed where she'd been laid, then to the healers working feverishly with her. He turned to the youngest of them that was standing back from the bed as the elder two worked. “Kagome, and the pup?” he demanded, his voice guttural and eyes hazed crimson – he could smell blood.
Frightened, the youngest female bowed. “She has gone into labor, my Lord, the impact was too great for her body to withstand. The pup... was not due for another month – we do not know what will happen, if he will survive or not,” she said quietly. “Kagome-sama... she hasn't awoken yet...”
Stricken, unable to move for a moment, he simply stared at her tiny form in the large bed, eyes wide for several long seconds as he pondered the possibility of losing his mate and firstborn – and all due to the treachery of a trusted servant. He could feel the darkness inside himself rising up with the fear of losing her, because though he had Tenseiga, there was no guarantee the sword would cooperate if it did end up being needed.
“Take every care of her you can,” he growled, rage thick in his voice. “If she dies...” he didn't finish - he didn't need to, then turned and disappeared out of the room, heading back towards the gardens.
He arrived just as Yori died; red eyes glaring at the two servants who'd remained with him, he snapped, “One of you go prepare a place for him in the holding cells beneath the palace.” Staring down at the inuyoukai sprawled on the ground before him, he drew Tenseiga, then destroyed the pallbearers that hovered over the traitor, sheathing the sword once it was clear it had cooperated with him. The moment that the inu drew breath once again, Sesshoumaru grabbed him and restrained him, the darkness threatening to once more take over his mind as he fought for control.
Illumination.
All this time, Kagome had been there, illuminating the darkness within him and allowing the light trapped deep within to glow brighter; if she died, all that would be gone, and the darkness would deepen and swallow every bit of light he held leaving him frozen in a black, cold night once more.
After a few moments of fighting to regain his control, he dragged the still weak body of Yori down to the holding cell he'd demanded be readied, throwing him inside before locking him in and leaving orders that he was to be left completely isolated. No one was allowed near the traitor but him.
Barely holding on to his composure, Sesshoumaru headed back towards his rooms, too worried to stay away; normally prohibited or not, he would be in the room with his wife as she birthed their pup. He would not be able to stay away.
The servants made no demur; knowing that his instincts were being strafed by his mate's injuries and fears for her and their pup, they knew better than to argue with any of his demands, and simply continued on with assisting the laboring but still unconscious female as he watched, red-eyed and enraged at her suffering.
As the day wore on and the labor got more intense, though Kagome had yet to wake, Sesshoumaru found himself lost in his anger at himself for not having caught on before it was too late. For three months they'd lived in their new home, with Yori constantly around his wife and the children, and not once had he noticed anything off.
Even now, though he could, of course, guess the reasons for the betrayal, he did not know the servant's reasons for certain, not having even allowed the older male to speak before attacking him. But looking back over their time here, he could not see any behavior from the traitor that would have given him away – the male had been most excellent at hiding his true feelings and intentions away.
If he had done it, Sesshoumaru was suddenly quite worried; who else could be hiding such hatreds behind friendly masks? It occurred to him rather belatedly to wonder if his wife had noticed Yori's true feelings, and if she had, why hadn't she spoken up about it?
He would have to ask her later – provided she survived. That thought made him snarl in fear; for the first time in his life, he was facing that emotion, one he'd never dealt with before, and he didn't like it now. The thought of losing his beloved wife, and/or their pup was just too much; his volatile temper came close to exploding at that, and that wasn't helped by the low moan of pain that came from the bed just then.
Instantly, he was beside her; completely ignoring the healers that were still hovering over her, he knelt at her side and took her hand into one of his, the cold feel of it causing his eyes to deepen to crimson again. “Kagome,” he growled, his voice deep and barely understandable. It was enough, though, the sound of her name coming from him gaining her attention as she groaned once more and her eyes began to open.
“It hurts,” she whimpered, her eyes glazed; it was obvious she wasn't completely aware of her surroundings yet.
“Be still,” he rumbled, trying desperately to regain his control so as not to frighten her. “You must remain still, wife.”
“What h-happened?” she mumbled, blinking as she tried to focus her oddly uncooperative eyes. “What's going on?”
“You were attacked, little mate, and are now in labor. But you must stay calm, for the sake of our pup,” he soothed as she frowned, a hand going to her head with the pain and confusion.
“No... Sesshoumaru,” she moaned, becoming more aware as his words kicked in, “it isn't time for the pup to come – is it okay?”
Before he could say anything else, one of the healers spoke. “Do not fear, Kagome-sama, the pup is still living. We can all feel his aura, and it is strong. I believe that you are in more distress than he is, and that is why you must listen to Sesshoumaru-sama, and remain calm.”
A contraction hit her just then, and she cried out in pain, just beginning to really realize that her whole body hurt – it wasn't just the contractions. She could feel that one of her arms was broken, and something was wrong with the leg on that side, as well, since both limbs were wrapped – that must have been the side she was hit on. She had no memory of the attack, but she did remember the details of what had happened up until her barrier fell, and eyes widening, she looked up at her husband with tears sparkling in them.
“It was Yori,” she whispered, her gaze pained as she looked at him. “He hated what had happened to your father, and was determined that a human woman wouldn't be your downfall.”
Sesshoumaru barely bit back the snarl that wanted to rip from his chest at that name. “I do not care what his excuse was, Kagome,” he said, his voice icy with hatred, “he will suffer for what he has done.” His tone was adamant, and Kagome knew there was little point in arguing; Yori's fate was sealed, he had bought suffering and death the moment he had laid hands upon her, and despite the changes to her husband's character since he'd taken her as his, the lightening of his darkness, he was still youkai.
There would always be darkness in him, it was just part of being youkai.
But at least he was not like Naraku; his darkness was reserved for those that had earned it, and Yori certainly had.
So she merely nodded at him, her eyes sliding closed as the motion made her head pound, and then cried out as another contraction moved through her, gratefully clasping Sesshoumaru's hand as she fought through the pain of birthing their pup.
And all he could do was sit there and hold onto her hand and pray to every kami he knew the name of that his wife and son would survive...
Or that, at the very least, Tenseiga would not choose their deaths as the time to go against his will.
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Throughout the rest of that day, Kagome watched Sesshoumaru, stunned by his behavior. He was completely different than she'd ever have thought him to be. Now that all the fighting and business of the jewel and Naraku was done, she actually had the time to pay attention to things... and what she was seeing went beyond anything she'd ever have thought to see from the – normally – cold lord.
Or is this his normal behavior when alone with those he cares for, and his ice and disdain, his rage, only for those he doesn't care for? The only way she could really answer that without directly asking, was by watching Jaken – and that answered her question quite nicely, as the toad was just as stunned by this new Sesshoumaru as she was.
Apparently, he had changed – and quite quickly, too.
The most telling behavior came in his treatment of Inuyasha.
While he did not appear to pay too much attention to him, or at least, not any more than he did to any of the children, there was no rage, no disdain, no hatred... no negativity of any kind towards the child. When he did speak to the boy, there was a simple quiet command in his voice like there was with everyone else.
He treated him the same as he treated Rin, and Shippo.
Oh, it was more than apparent that Sesshoumaru was still just as dangerous as he had ever been. Any threat to what was his was treated with the same deadly response, as they found mid-way through the day when an oni attacked. But he was warmer with those under his protection, than he had ever been before. Just the word protection, in reference to Sesshoumaru, was strange. He had always before denied protecting anything.
Now he did not – and just that one fact was a major spectrum shift within the soul of the daiyoukai.
It was becoming apparent that her light did more than just 'illuminate' a youkai's dark soul.
Things, as her mother had often said, always looked different in the light of day, but Kagome had always just shrugged that saying off, taking it as just that – a saying. But as that day wore on, and more just like it, as well, she began to see that the idea behind the saying – that things, once illuminated, changed – was true.
Her light was changing Sesshoumaru, slowly but surely. But how much would he actually change?
She couldn't help but wonder what he would be once he had finished changing... if there was such a thing as 'finishing'.
Still, it was apparent that Sesshoumaru wasn't the only one changing, as Shippo began to act a bit more like his new role-model, becoming a bit more reserved, and a little more serious as time went on, and days turned into weeks, then into months. Inuyasha did as well; though he didn't interact directly with his brother very often, obviously still very distrustful of anyone – other than Kagome – he did begin to emulate the adult inu a bit as time passed, and she couldn't help but find it cute.
This is how it should have been the first time around, she thought. But at least... at least now, it is. That's better than nothing.
Kagome herself seemed to be having the most trouble adjusting to all the changes. After all, though she'd been dealing with this era for some time, it had been on a part time basis. She had always had the option of going home – but now she did not. It made a huge difference, she was finding. Add to that, Sesshoumaru's wandering nature, dealing with three children on a constant basis, and the lack of anyplace to truly call home, and Kagome was an uncomfortable young woman.
That fact was not missed by her powerful mate.
Sesshoumaru had never before considered the need for a place to call home. He had wandered all of his adult life, seeking the Tessaiga and supreme conquest with equal facility. A home had been nothing he'd needed – then. Now, however, he considered as he sat back against a boulder in their latest camp, it was something he would have to look into. His priorities were different, now, and with that, came new and different responsibilities.
Inwardly, he could not help but growl lightly at what he was becoming. He knew, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that once he finally did pass on, the first being he would see on the other side would be his sire – who would then spend the rest of eternity gloating. It was not something he looked forward to...
But the reason his father would have to gloat was so very worth it, and he would never give her up now, even if he could have. He had never known what it was to be content with what he had – before, he had always striven to be more, to do more, to prove himself the pinnacle of youkai potential. But because of that, he had never known the simple concept of peace.
Once upon a time, he would have scoffed at anyone bringing that lack to his attention. He was the killing perfection, the aristocratic assassin, the destruction of the circle of life. What need had he for peace, a concept which his very name denied?
Looking back, he had been a fool, and he could admit that – at least, within the sanctity of his own mind. It would never be something he said aloud, of course.
Still, all of that to say that he needed to provide what his little mate required, and that was a home.
Now, he could have found an easy out by simply taking up residence in one of the many caves that dotted the landscape of the Western Lands. But he was well aware of the fact that his wife was used to the luxuries that her advanced time gave her, though he didn't know specifics, of course, and making her live in a dank cave would have made him no better than Koga, who also lived in a cave.
Primitive, and not up to his standards as a Lord, and, more importantly, a very wealthy Lord. So that would obviously not do. Especially as even the highest of luxuries of his time would likely seem somewhat primitive to Kagome.
No... it was time to build himself a home. And it would be a home fitting for the wife of the Western Lord, of that he was determined – nothing but the best would do. His glance fell on Rin, and he almost smiled inwardly – these accommodations would also have to have extensive gardens, or the girl would be sneaking off to find fields of flowers every time they turned around. And a dojo... for training the kitsune, Inuyasha, and any children he did conceive with his little miko mate.
That thought, as it always did, made his loins tighten uncomfortably, and he wryly thought about the fact that this new home would definitely need an extensive nursery – and family wing. His need for his mate had not subsided, nor had it even lessened slightly in all the months that he'd had her – he still wanted her with an intensity that had, at first, surprised him.
It also, he'd noticed, surprised her.
Despite the things he'd told her of inu, and inu nature, she still seemed to be waiting for the day he decided he no longer wanted her. In fact, the kitsune had let slip one day that he'd overheard her worrying to herself – apparently, she thought that someday, he would tire of her, and would take another female on the side... and for some reason, she thought that Kagura would be that female.
The thought made him look over at his mate; deciding that now was a good time, he crooked his finger at her, beckoning her to his side, then stood and, without a word of explanation, led her from the camp with only a threat to Jaken to watch over what he considered precious.
Once far enough out of camp for their discussion to remain private, he turned and faced her, watching her silently for a few moments as he took in her natural beauty. With the breeze lifting her ebon locks around her, and the questioning light in gorgeous azure eyes that were lit from within, as always, by her brilliant soul, he wondered why she would worry over such a foolish thing.
“Why would this one ever leave his mate to take Kagura as a concubine? She could never bring him the pleasure that you do,” he said bluntly, knowing she would be shocked at his conversational gambit.
She was, her eyes widening impossibly. “H-how did you k-know?” she stuttered out, her aura swirling around her in consternation.
He reached up to his shoulder with one hand, loosening the ties holding his armor on and stepping around it as it crashed to the ground. Easily, naturally, he pulled her into his arms, resting her head on his chest as he ran his hand soothingly through her midnight hair, he crooned wordlessly to her for a small time to calm her shock. Once she had calmed down enough, he pulled back just enough to see her face and cupped her chin in one hand, tilting her blushing visage to meet his eyes.
“I pay attention, Kagome. Do you think I have not noticed Kagura's occasional presence? You fear needlessly, however. I have absolutely no attraction to her – nor indeed any other, save you.” He eyed her for a moment, and then sighed, leaning down to kiss her tenderly. “Do you question my honor, or just my seeming lack of what you call emotion?” he asked after pulling back to let her breathe, inwardly pleased at the dazed look in her eyes. They sharpened very quickly on hearing his question, however.
“No! I know you have honor, Sesshoumaru,” she said, vehemently. “But... I want you to be happy, and what happens if later you meet someone and fall in love? Then you'll be stuck with me... and I don't want that. It would make me very unhappy to be the cause of your misery,” she admitted shyly, looking away with a blush as she realized what she was giving away with her words.
She couldn't help it. It had been months since he'd claimed her in that cave, and slowly, but surely, she'd fallen in love with the quiet, controlled, but – in her opinion – perfect male. He was honorable, protective, caring, and not least of all, absolutely gorgeous – how could she not fall in love with him? He treated her as though she were the most precious thing that had ever been created, and she hadn't realized how starved for that kind of caring she really was.
And now she was afraid to lose it.
Kagura hadn't ever hidden how she felt about the daiyoukai, and at least in Kagome's eyes, she was much the better match for someone of Sesshoumaru's power. She was, at least, a full youkai, something Kagome was not, and never would be.
The female youkai came near on a frequent basis, probably hoping that which Kagome feared would actually come to pass – even if he couldn't actually mate her because Kagome was already his mate, apparently Kagura was willing for him to take her as a concubine if that was all he could offer.
She was stunned to hear him beckon to Kagura as he let her go to step back from him awkwardly as the kaze youkai drifted into the little glade on her feather cautiously.
He held his mates gaze, however, watching her face closely as Kagura approached. After studying her for several long moments, he finally looked over at Kagura and held her longing gaze.
“You remain nearby wherever we travel after I told you after Naraku's death to leave. Why?”
Kagura held his gaze proudly. “I wait for you to come to your senses and realize what I could be to you. I know she is your mate, and that cannot be changed, but I can be your concubine, and love you as you should be loved. I can also give you a proper heir – one with no trace of human blood,” she replied, not even looking at Kagome.
“You wait in vain,” he told her bluntly. “I will never take another to my bed, nor will I ever pup one who is not my mate.”
Kagura snarled at that. “Perhaps, then, the miko will meet with an accident, and then she will no longer be your mate!”
Kagome tensed at the kaze's words, but Sesshoumaru stood before her protectively, making it quite clear that no harm would be allowed to be visited upon her.
“I sometimes forget that you are a created youkai,” he finally said, his eyes narrowed as he considered the kaze. “She is my mate – that does not end at death. Were she to die, still, she would remain my mate, and I would never take another. I could not, even if I wanted to, which I would not. What I said before still stands, Kagura – go, take your freedom, and find a life for yourself. Whatever life you choose will never include this one, so do not let me catch your presence anywhere near myself or my mate again. If I do, I will consider it an act of aggression, and will kill you without further warning.”
With that said, he waited, blatantly expecting her to leave. With a pale, angry, yet hurt expression, she glared at Kagome, and then left in a swirl of wind and autumn leaves as Kagome watched her sadly.
She knew all too well what it was like to be rejected for another.
Silence fell for a few minutes as Kagome took in what had happened, and Sesshoumaru allowed her to.
Then... “Do you still fear I will take another to my bed, mate?”
Taking a deep breath of the crisp, clear air of fall, Kagome held it, and then expelled it deeply, wondering how to explain herself. It wasn't as easy as he made it sound, to dismiss her fears...
“I... believe that you are being honest about how you see things... but no one knows the future, Sesshoumaru,” she finally stated quietly. “If not Kagura, then there could be someone else... someone that you meet, and suddenly, you want nothing more than to spend forever with them, and fear them being taken away from you with everything you are.” She ran her hands down her hakama covered thighs, nervousness making her hands damp as she waited for him to speak.
He watched her for a few moments, admittedly a bit perturbed at her severe disbelief in herself – he was fully aware that she wasn't questioning him – it was herself she didn't have faith in.
“And have you never considered that I have already found that person in you? Do you think I would have chosen to mate you if I did not already wish to spend forever with you? After all, that is just what a mating ensures, does it not? Literally forever, as we will remain together even in death,” he said, noting her surprised expression. “And would I bother to protect you if I did not fear you being taken from me?”
It was obvious that she had never considered that, her expression completely stunned as she stared at him. But it was also obvious that his words were sinking in; he could see the thoughts he had inspired through her expressive eyes.
After a few minutes of watching her, he once more pulled her into his arms, stroking her hair as he nuzzled into the fragrant locks, his eyes closing at the familiar, and quite beloved, scent. “You fear that I do not feel emotion as you do – and in some ways, you are correct. Most humans seem to feel emotions fleetingly, as I believe I have pointed out before. Youkai are not the same. Any emotion we do feel is deeply held, and lasts for eternity. That is how I can assure you that I will never take another. You are the one I have chosen to bind myself to, in life and in death. Is that not the ultimate definition of the emotion you call love?” he asked softly, feeling her stiffen in shock as her breathing hitched.
She pulled back to look at him, and he allowed it, dropping his usual mask, he let her see what she needed in his eyes, everything she inspired in him echoing loudly there for her to see.
Tears filled her eyes as she held his; she'd never seen such an intense look from anyone before, and it completely overwhelmed her. It was all there, everything she'd ever wanted to see, and it was all for her.
It literally left her breathless.
He seemed to understand, instead of speaking, he simply bent to softly lick her tears from her cheeks, and with a barely-there sigh, her eyes closed as she submitted to his ministrations. After a few minutes of that, she managed to get her emotions under control enough; eyes flickering open once more, she locked her gaze with his, her own now showing the same intensity his had as she said, “I love you, too, Sesshoumaru,” her voice so low it was almost a whisper.
His eyes flared with triumph as he heard her words – he'd been almost positive the depths of his own feelings had been returned, but not completely certain, by any means. Now, though, he was.
Considering her almost longingly, he smiled slightly as he began to disrobe, leaving her in no uncertainty of his desires as she flushed most becomingly.
“I believe it is time to pup my mate, now instead of in a year or two,” he said slowly, eyeing her sweet form with passionate need clouding his expression. “I have waited long enough.”
Kagome blinked, startled. “W-what?” she asked. “You mean, you've been deliberately waiting?” She seemed quite surprised.
Down to his hakama, which were riding dangerously low on his hips, he smiled predatorially at her as he stepped forward to begin assisting her out of her own clothes. “Of course. It is the male who determines when conception of a pup is desired. You had much to deal with after I claimed you, not the least of which was learning to deal with the several pups we already have. I did not wish to overburden you with another.” He caressed each part of her as it was uncovered, and Kagome quickly lost her thoughts to passion.
“But I think you are ready, little mate,” he whispered as he lowered her to his pelt, enjoying the visual of her spread out before him and welcoming his attentions. “And the timing is certainly appropriate, as you are just coming in to your fertile period.”
“Oh,” she whispered back, unable to speak any louder as his need pressed heatedly into her thigh. “So you want us to have a... baby... now?”
“I wish to see my female swell with my seed, to watch as your body grows to accommodate the life we create together. I want to see the pup we create, what he will look like, how his personality will develop.” He nuzzled into her neck as his breath brushed hotly over her flesh; Kagome's whole body shivered at that, and at his words. She could feel her body preparing itself for his possession just from them alone. “I desire to make a pup with you, it is not a desire for a child that drives me, but a desire to create a life from both of us, little mate.”
He trailed kisses down her neck and across her collarbone as he spoke, biting down gently along the bone and drawing another shiver from her and a soft moan as he moved. “A precious life born of my passion for my mate; is there anything more beautiful than that?” he asked. She shook her head as his lips circled a nipple, gasping as his words and actions inflamed her body beyond anything she'd ever known.
“S-sesshoumaru,” she whimpered, her mind a blank as his heated caresses stole her thoughts. “Please,” she begged, tilting her hips into his – she didn't need foreplay, she was more ready than she'd ever been for him, her body welcoming his every touch, every soft caress as desire weakened her knees – it was a good thing they were already lying down.
“Shhh, little one. Let me love you as I wish to,” he said, exhaling over her now wet nipple, satisfaction surging inside him as she arched into him and choked out her submission to his desires. “You are so beautiful, Kagome – there is not another like you in all of creation.” Sweet moans and whimpers followed his words and his path down her heated body as she writhed beneath him, every part of her engaged by him in this encounter - heart, body, and soul.
Sesshoumaru was not proof against her little exclamations of need and love, every word she managed to utter fired his desire until he was literally in pain from the tightness of his flesh against her. In some ways, he wished that there was a way that she could see inside his mind, and actually feel his emotions when it came to her – it would dispel a great deal of her unnecessary fears.
He was not like his father at all... no, he loved only one, and he mated only one. He would never dishonor her or himself in seeking another, she was all he could ever want, the beginning and end of his desires and emotions.
She had illuminated them, finding them buried in the darkness of his soul, bringing them to vivid life, and were she to disappear from his life, she would also be the end of them – without her, his heart had no desire to continue living, and would wither and die in painful misery.
He did his best to show her that through his loving, just as he would through the way he cared for her in everyday life. He wanted her to know what she meant to him without doubt, though he was not one to speak of his emotions, nor name them. That didn't mean that they weren't there, however, not by a long shot.
Yes, it was most certainly time to pup his little mate, and begin to build a full family with her – not just an adopted one.
She was ready now, and so was he.
~oOo~
As with most things that Sesshoumaru put his mind to, it wasn't long before it was obvious to him that his wife was, indeed, expecting their first pup, and with that, his drive to have an acceptable home built before the birth of the pup became a top priority.
Gathering the best and most skilled builders in the west, and making sure that only the finest materials were used in the dwelling he was creating, Sesshoumaru became almost a slave driver, making certain that the house went up quickly, but thoroughly.
Kagome, of course, had no idea; he wanted to surprise her when the time came, and also with news of her pregnancy.
In the meantime, they had stopped moving around quite so much, staying in one general area, Sesshoumaru not wanting to strain his now pregnant female with too much traveling. The chance to settle down, even if it was outside in the great wide open, seemed to perk her up, and he felt a small bit of guilt that he had not noticed sooner that his wife was wanting a place to call home.
Before the place was completed, however, he wanted to check in at the village, and let his mate get a chance to see her friends before winter set in. Once her pregnancy advanced, he would not be letting her out to traipse the countryside until she'd whelped, so he knew it would be at least late next spring before he'd be willing to let his wife and firstborn out of the palace to visit again.
The visit went well, things going smoothly in the village with the protection of a monk, miko, and two taijiya against plundering youkai, not to mention the same against any human bandits. It also helped that the village was known to be under his eye, so most with any brains stayed away.
The palace, for so it could indeed be called, was finally finished just before winter truly set in, and calling together those loyal servants of his father's who still lived, he soon had the place staffed, and then it was time to take his wife to their new home for the first time. He could hardly wait to see her reaction.
Kagome was, in a word, stunned.
Sure, she knew Sesshoumaru was a Lord, and she also knew he was wealthy. But... a palace? She should have expected it, really. But what caught her attention the most was that he'd done it for her – because he'd noticed that she really wanted a home, someplace to go back to when the journeys got tiring.
“You did this because you knew I missed having a home, didn't you?” she asked later that night when they were finally alone in their new quarters, a soft, melting look in her eyes, though she was a bit nervous that it was a palace.
“That was one reason, but there was another, more personal reason,” he said slowly, moving towards her and tilting her chin up to look into her face. “You are pregnant, mate, and I'd not have you whelping our pup out in the wilds,” he finished, almost smiling at her shocked expression.
“P-pregnant?” she stumbled, almost as though the word didn't want to come out right. She'd known her period hadn't appeared, of course, but she'd always been irregular, so that didn't really tell her anything.
At that, he did chuckle, just slightly. “Yes. Was that not what I told you I wanted? I usually get what I desire. You are approximately three months along, and will whelp in another four,” he said. “If you noticed, I made the family wing quite large - there will be more where this one comes from.” He put a tender hand to her belly, looking down to watch himself caress the place their child lay curled safely within her womb.
Softly flushed, Kagome stared down at his hand on her belly in wonder; it was so hard to imagine herself as pregnant! She was about to be someone's mother... and not just by adoption. It was a very scary realization...
“But what if I'm not a good mother?” she asked, suddenly panicking. “I mean, its different than just taking care of Rin, Shippo, and Inuyasha! I'm still so young, what if I mess this up?”
He put a finger to her lips, looking down at her with an indulgent expression on his face. “Kagome,” he said, “calm down. You have more than proven yourself as a parent with the three we already care for. Do you think your instincts will be any weaker with one that is truly yours? You will be fine – if I did not believe you capable of it, I would never have gifted you with my fertile seed.”
Her blush deepened to scalding at his provocative words, but looking up into his eyes, she couldn't bring herself to argue. He wouldn't have gotten her pregnant if he didn't believe she could handle it, and she knew that. If he was so certain of her, then she should just calm down and not worry about it, because Sesshoumaru was rarely wrong about anything.
She smiled shyly against his finger and kissed it; he moved his finger and replaced it with his lips, instead, and she moaned low in her throat at the tender caress. As far as she was concerned, he could kiss her anytime he wanted, he was soo damn good at it. There was nothing like his touch...
He responded to her moan with a soft growl, the vibrations passing from his lips to hers and making her press to him more fully to feel him better. One hand went to the nape of her neck to tilt her head, the other going to cup her chin as he deepened the kiss even more, moving slowly and exploring every inch of her mouth as though he'd never kissed her before.
It was always like this; every time he touched her was just like the first time, the intensity, the heat, the feeling of it. When he was with her like this, she knew without a doubt that she was the only thing on his mind – he gave all of his attention to the task of making love to her, and she responded to that by opening all of herself to him.
Most times, now, she could barely remember that she'd ever been in love with anyone else, and looking back, she knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that she really hadn't been. What she'd felt for Inuyasha had been puppy love, the love of a still immature girl for an equally immature boy.
This was nothing like that.
This was the love of a woman for a man, an adult love, a complete love, and she would never now be able to look back on the things that had happened with regret – she was too happy. Even the well closing – while it had hurt, and she missed her family, she was actually thankful now that Naraku had done whatever it was that he had done to close it, because she couldn't imagine living without the magnificent male that had taken her as his own... and meant it.
She wasn't a replacement for someone else, wasn't needed to find shards of a sacred jewel for him. He simply wanted her, as she was, and with everything she'd been through, she certainly needed that kind of caring.
He'd given it, too, without question. Not once since they'd been together had he ever actually said the words, but his actions told her every day that he felt that way, even if he never said it.
But... she'd only said it once, herself, and she felt that perhaps it was time to do so again. After all, she wasn't him. It wasn't really in Sesshoumaru's personality to speak of such personal things as emotions, but, she, Kagome, was different. She was the type to speak of such things, at least to the other person involved, and she shouldn't let the fact that he had never said the words hold her back from saying them herself, and frequently.
So it was that as Sesshoumaru pulled back from the kiss to let her breathe finally, his gaze taking in the long dark lashes laying smudged against her cheeks, she opened her eyes and met his with a smile, and said, “I love you, Sesshoumaru.”
Simply said, merely four words, but to the daiyoukai listening, they were the sweetest ones the language contained. He hadn't forgotten he and his mates discussion about inuyoukai and how mates were treated, and her definition of love, nor the one and only other time she'd said it.
With a hoarse groan, he swooped down to take her mouth again, trying to show his intense feelings for her in the sweet contact between their lips by pouring every bit of his passion into the kiss.
For endless minutes he kissed her, his mouth sweetly greedy as he attempted to take all of her sweetness for himself, and she answered him back with as much passion as he invested into the kiss, returning it all to him with interest.
Finally, breaking away from her and breathing heavily, he drew his mouth across her cheek and down the curve of her jaw to her neck, nibbling, licking, and suckling at her tender flesh as she dropped her head back, submitting quite happily to the touch of her lover as she moaned, groaned, whimpered and even whined in reaction to his ministrations.
Gods, he thought almost dazedly, does she have any idea what those sounds are doing to me? Probably not... he decided that maybe he should tell her.
Still nuzzling into the flesh of her neck, he murmured, “Do you know what the sounds you make do to me, woman? When I touch you... just like this,” he cupped a breast, his touch deft, sensuous, “and you moan, just like that?”
He shivered, and she felt it, a smile crossing her plump, swollen lips. “It's only fair,” she gasped out after a moment, as he nipped at her, “since you do the same things to me when you make those sounds of enjoyment, you know.”
“Hn,” he sighed, still nuzzling her. He'd worked his way around to the nape of her neck, so soft, so fragrant, brushing her raven tresses over her shoulder in the process. His eyes fell closed in enjoyment as she trembled and gasped. She just smelled so good.
She shivered as large hands wrapped around her upper arms and held her in place as he nipped her neck – she had developed a rather extensive fixation with his fangs, and loved it when he used them on her just the way he was doing now. He seemed to know it, too, and took every advantage he could.
Nudging the collar of her yukata down with his nose, he reached down and untied the small belt holding it closed, then slid the garment off of her, enjoying the puff of her scent the small breeze it caused as it fell sent towards him.
Now naked, Kagome let her head fall forward as he continued his attentions to her nape and shoulders, just enjoying his touch. Somehow, and she had no idea how he did it, his touch was both soothing and arousing, and the combination of feelings made her knees go weak.
Sesshoumaru growled low in his chest as her knees went out from under her, swinging her up into his arms and carrying her to the bed, where he placed her gently down, and then began to divest himself of his own garments, watching her watch him all the while.
He enjoyed the blush on her cheeks – even all these months later she still got so sweetly embarrassed when he stripped, though it didn't stop her from looking. And enjoying. Her scent always spiked so deliciously as he dropped his clothes. He loved it – and of course, his nudity didn't bother him a bit – he knew his body was perfection, and so saw no need to be embarrassed. She really shouldn't be, either, especially about her own body, though he knew she was still shy about being totally nude around him, too.
She just hid it a little better than she did her reaction to his nudity.
Wasting no time in crawling up the bed after her once his clothes were gone, he pulled her down beneath him as he positioned himself over her, and noting by scent that she needed no real foreplay, he simply thrust forward, taking her willing body over from the inside out as she gasped, shocked, yet overwhelmingly aroused.
He immediately set up a strong rhythm, such a passionate fire in his blood for her that he could not hold himself back. Every part of her, from her hazy blue eyes that were drooping, to the flushed cheeks contrasting so beautifully with the dark smudges of her lashes laying against them, to the swollen lips he loved so much, her perfect breasts and shapely figure – all of it just strangled his control and destroyed it, leaving him aching for her.
There was no reason to deny himself, either, and so he did not, taking her hard and fast to the very heights of passion and poising her there as she cried out, arching into him and begging for her release. He gave it to her... he could never deny her this, would never want to, and as she tumbled over the edge into chaotic pleasure, he followed, once again forced over the edge quickly in their first round of bed-play. He'd been quite correct in thinking that if he wanted a long round, it would have to be as a secondary encounter, because the first time he was always too impassioned to hold back.
That hadn't changed at all, no matter how many times he'd taken her, and he had by now realized that it never would. He just wanted her too much to ever resist.
As they both came back down, he rolled onto his side so as not to put too much weight on her, slowly allowing his body to cool and his breathing to calm, just as hers did. After a little while of silence, he looked over at her, thinking about initiating that second encounter, only to chuckle slightly at the sight of her, completely asleep and peaceful at it.
With a sigh, he pulled her to him, settling her comfortably against his body, and allowed himself to also drift off to the relaxing sound of her breathing.
Apparently, he would have to wait 'til later to have her again...
But that was acceptable. After all, she now carried their pup, and would undoubtedly tire more easily. The loss of multiple encounters a night was worth it, as far as he was concerned.
They could certainly be made up for at another time.
~oOo~
Kagome frowned uneasily, placing a protective hand over her now swollen abdomen as she came to a stop; she'd been getting odd feelings in the last week – feelings of hatred that were very directed at her, Inuyasha and Rin, specifically. There was no hostility aimed at Shippo, however, and that gave the truth away to the little miko – someone here in the palace hated her and Rin's humanity, and Inuyasha's, as well.
She didn't, however, know how to bring it up to Sesshoumaru. After all, every person here had been loyal to his father at one point, and he had hand-picked them himself to serve in their new home just a few months ago. She didn't want to upset him by making him think she didn't trust his judgment.
Looking back over her shoulder, her feelings of uneasiness increased, and she started moving again, hurrying back towards the family's wing. She couldn't see anyone, but she could certainly feel that she was being watched with hostile intentions, and wanted to get out of the very empty corridor as soon as possible.
By the time she reached the main gathering room in the family wing where the children were, she was almost out of breath from running as fast as she could, and she slid the door open and raced inside before sliding it closed behind her – whoever was out there was not stopping this time, and for some reason, no servants were to be seen anywhere.
That fact frightened her – it could mean nothing good.
She backed away from the doors, her eyes peeled to them as a shadow made itself known against them, and with the children rushing up to her in a panic, she pushed them behind her as the door slid slowly open.
“Stay behind me, Inuyasha, Rin. Shippo,” she whispered urgently, “go find Sesshoumaru, now!” She whipped around hurriedly and pushed him towards the doors into the garden, along with Inuyasha and the now-terrified Rin, then turned back to face their stalker as the children burst through the doors into the garden and scattered.
When the door opened fully and revealed who it was, Kagome's heart broke for her beloved husband – he would be very angry when he found out who was responsible for the attack she could tell was about to come. The only thing she could do was run into the garden herself, gather Rin and Inuyasha, and put up a barrier, which she could hopefully hold until her mate arrived.
Unfortunately, the pup growing within her was wearing her down, and she had not had much energy lately; she knew she wouldn't be able to hold it through more than a few blows.
Running outside, she ignored the older inu male's snarl, determined to reach the children before anything could harm them. She found them quickly, their fear giving them away, and drawing her energy up around herself, watched as Yori, Sesshoumaru's most trusted servant, stalked her into the gardens with a look of hatred and revulsion on his face.
She shook her head, tears running down her cheeks as she watched him move towards her barrier. Hurry, Shippo! “Why, Yori? Why are you doing this?” she asked despairingly, clutching the frightened children to her as her own heart pounded with fear for them and her unborn child.
The male snarled at her, red bleeding into his silver eyes. “Because you are a filthy human, wench! I watched my Lord Inu no Taisho fall from his position of respect, power, and honor into an ignoble death because of a miserable human female, and that weak bratling clutching at your legs,” he gestured with disdain at Inuyasha, who growled at him, baring his little fangs, “and I will not watch the same happen to my Lord Sesshoumaru. I will destroy the weakness you three bring to this house!” He attacked her barrier, then, and Kagome slipped to her knees as it shuddered under his blows, her energy weakening. She hugged the two children to her for a moment and then pushed them away. “Get behind me, both of you,” she managed to get out, “and when the barrier falls, run!”
The barrier shuddered once more and then went down as she slipped further to the ground before the half-feral inuyoukai, and the children ran, Rin dragging Inuyasha behind her as the boy tried to stay back and protect Kagome. With no energy left to fight the male, she could do little more than curl up protectively around her abdomen as she was lifted and flung against the walls of the garden, everything going dark as she impacted against it and pain flashed through her mind.
Sesshoumaru was in the main audience hall speaking to the servants; his most trusted retainer besides Jaken had come to him that morning and informed him that there was a threat to his wife from someone in the palace, and he immediately pulled all the servants into the great room to speak to them and find out who it was that would dare to threaten what was his.
But he was left with an uneasy frown when not one of the servants in the room were found to be carrying any hint of malice towards his mate. If they had been, with his questions, their scent would have given them away immediately. “Jaken.”
The little toad scrambled to bow before his master. “Hai, Sesshoumaru-sama?”
“Where is Yori?” he asked slowly, as he suddenly realized that he could not feel the male's youki anywhere in the palace.
“I am not certain, my Lord, but I will go look for him!” the gami announced, and as Sesshoumaru nodded at him, he scrambled out of the room as the servants all looked on in confusion, not understanding what was going on.
Just moments after Jaken disappeared, however, the daiyouikai felt Shippo's youki racing towards him full of terror and worry, and he turned on his heel to face the door as the little kitsune burst into the room in a full-blown panic.
“Sesshoumaru!” he cried out, too panicked to worry about honorifics; the daiyoukai certainly didn't care in that moment, knowing his worst fears were about to be realized.
“Where?” he snapped, his whole body tensing.
“The family gardens! You have to help her!” Shippo screamed; Sesshoumaru didn't even wait for him to finish - he was out of the room and gone before the first words died away.
The scene he arrived to find would forever be burned into his memory; his beautiful wife flying through the air only to impact against the privacy wall around the garden with a loud thud, then fall to the ground limply. She didn't move again.
With a roar of sheer rage, he turned to the one who had attacked her, and hatred bled into his eyes as he realized the extent of the betrayal.
“Yori,” he spat, landing between his wife's body and the crying children and the inu he'd trusted. “You will die here today – I care not for your reasons. Prepare yourself for the death given to those who betray their Lords,” he bit out. His eyes never leaving the inu now crouched across from him, he ordered the servants who had followed him to take his mate to their chambers and call for the healers, and to get the children out of the garden, as well.
As soon as his wife and the children were out of the way, he moved, not sparing another word to the traitor; he simply attacked, planning to kill him in the most painful way possible – and the slowest.
The battle lasted mere moments, the other was a simple servant, not a warrior, and with the entrance of Sesshoumaru's poison into his body, he became unable to move quite quickly as the poisons began to eat at him slowly from the inside out.
Sesshoumaru stood above the fallen inu, hands still clawed as blood dripped from the sharp tips, his markings jagged and eyes feral. He lifted one hand, and not breaking the other male's pained gaze, licked the blood from his claws with every evidence of enjoyment. The great daiyoukai might have softened towards his wife and the children somewhat, but the fierce, dark warrior was still there underneath – and he'd just proved it.
When the inu lay, stiff and still on the ground, Sesshoumaru ordered the two servants still outside with him to stand guard as the male's insides slowly rotted away, the aura of agonizing pain from him impossible to ignore, and then rushed to his chambers to see to his mate. His blood was heated, hatred for the one who had harmed his wife running high within him, and he needed to see her, to be with her, to make sure she was going to be alright.
Because if she wasn't... if he had to use Tenseiga to bring her back to him, he would revive Yori, and then throw him in the dungeon and torture him to death even more slowly the second time around.
Sweeping into his chambers, his eyes went immediately to the bed where she'd been laid, then to the healers working feverishly with her. He turned to the youngest of them that was standing back from the bed as the elder two worked. “Kagome, and the pup?” he demanded, his voice guttural and eyes hazed crimson – he could smell blood.
Frightened, the youngest female bowed. “She has gone into labor, my Lord, the impact was too great for her body to withstand. The pup... was not due for another month – we do not know what will happen, if he will survive or not,” she said quietly. “Kagome-sama... she hasn't awoken yet...”
Stricken, unable to move for a moment, he simply stared at her tiny form in the large bed, eyes wide for several long seconds as he pondered the possibility of losing his mate and firstborn – and all due to the treachery of a trusted servant. He could feel the darkness inside himself rising up with the fear of losing her, because though he had Tenseiga, there was no guarantee the sword would cooperate if it did end up being needed.
“Take every care of her you can,” he growled, rage thick in his voice. “If she dies...” he didn't finish - he didn't need to, then turned and disappeared out of the room, heading back towards the gardens.
He arrived just as Yori died; red eyes glaring at the two servants who'd remained with him, he snapped, “One of you go prepare a place for him in the holding cells beneath the palace.” Staring down at the inuyoukai sprawled on the ground before him, he drew Tenseiga, then destroyed the pallbearers that hovered over the traitor, sheathing the sword once it was clear it had cooperated with him. The moment that the inu drew breath once again, Sesshoumaru grabbed him and restrained him, the darkness threatening to once more take over his mind as he fought for control.
Illumination.
All this time, Kagome had been there, illuminating the darkness within him and allowing the light trapped deep within to glow brighter; if she died, all that would be gone, and the darkness would deepen and swallow every bit of light he held leaving him frozen in a black, cold night once more.
After a few moments of fighting to regain his control, he dragged the still weak body of Yori down to the holding cell he'd demanded be readied, throwing him inside before locking him in and leaving orders that he was to be left completely isolated. No one was allowed near the traitor but him.
Barely holding on to his composure, Sesshoumaru headed back towards his rooms, too worried to stay away; normally prohibited or not, he would be in the room with his wife as she birthed their pup. He would not be able to stay away.
The servants made no demur; knowing that his instincts were being strafed by his mate's injuries and fears for her and their pup, they knew better than to argue with any of his demands, and simply continued on with assisting the laboring but still unconscious female as he watched, red-eyed and enraged at her suffering.
As the day wore on and the labor got more intense, though Kagome had yet to wake, Sesshoumaru found himself lost in his anger at himself for not having caught on before it was too late. For three months they'd lived in their new home, with Yori constantly around his wife and the children, and not once had he noticed anything off.
Even now, though he could, of course, guess the reasons for the betrayal, he did not know the servant's reasons for certain, not having even allowed the older male to speak before attacking him. But looking back over their time here, he could not see any behavior from the traitor that would have given him away – the male had been most excellent at hiding his true feelings and intentions away.
If he had done it, Sesshoumaru was suddenly quite worried; who else could be hiding such hatreds behind friendly masks? It occurred to him rather belatedly to wonder if his wife had noticed Yori's true feelings, and if she had, why hadn't she spoken up about it?
He would have to ask her later – provided she survived. That thought made him snarl in fear; for the first time in his life, he was facing that emotion, one he'd never dealt with before, and he didn't like it now. The thought of losing his beloved wife, and/or their pup was just too much; his volatile temper came close to exploding at that, and that wasn't helped by the low moan of pain that came from the bed just then.
Instantly, he was beside her; completely ignoring the healers that were still hovering over her, he knelt at her side and took her hand into one of his, the cold feel of it causing his eyes to deepen to crimson again. “Kagome,” he growled, his voice deep and barely understandable. It was enough, though, the sound of her name coming from him gaining her attention as she groaned once more and her eyes began to open.
“It hurts,” she whimpered, her eyes glazed; it was obvious she wasn't completely aware of her surroundings yet.
“Be still,” he rumbled, trying desperately to regain his control so as not to frighten her. “You must remain still, wife.”
“What h-happened?” she mumbled, blinking as she tried to focus her oddly uncooperative eyes. “What's going on?”
“You were attacked, little mate, and are now in labor. But you must stay calm, for the sake of our pup,” he soothed as she frowned, a hand going to her head with the pain and confusion.
“No... Sesshoumaru,” she moaned, becoming more aware as his words kicked in, “it isn't time for the pup to come – is it okay?”
Before he could say anything else, one of the healers spoke. “Do not fear, Kagome-sama, the pup is still living. We can all feel his aura, and it is strong. I believe that you are in more distress than he is, and that is why you must listen to Sesshoumaru-sama, and remain calm.”
A contraction hit her just then, and she cried out in pain, just beginning to really realize that her whole body hurt – it wasn't just the contractions. She could feel that one of her arms was broken, and something was wrong with the leg on that side, as well, since both limbs were wrapped – that must have been the side she was hit on. She had no memory of the attack, but she did remember the details of what had happened up until her barrier fell, and eyes widening, she looked up at her husband with tears sparkling in them.
“It was Yori,” she whispered, her gaze pained as she looked at him. “He hated what had happened to your father, and was determined that a human woman wouldn't be your downfall.”
Sesshoumaru barely bit back the snarl that wanted to rip from his chest at that name. “I do not care what his excuse was, Kagome,” he said, his voice icy with hatred, “he will suffer for what he has done.” His tone was adamant, and Kagome knew there was little point in arguing; Yori's fate was sealed, he had bought suffering and death the moment he had laid hands upon her, and despite the changes to her husband's character since he'd taken her as his, the lightening of his darkness, he was still youkai.
There would always be darkness in him, it was just part of being youkai.
But at least he was not like Naraku; his darkness was reserved for those that had earned it, and Yori certainly had.
So she merely nodded at him, her eyes sliding closed as the motion made her head pound, and then cried out as another contraction moved through her, gratefully clasping Sesshoumaru's hand as she fought through the pain of birthing their pup.
And all he could do was sit there and hold onto her hand and pray to every kami he knew the name of that his wife and son would survive...
Or that, at the very least, Tenseiga would not choose their deaths as the time to go against his will.
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