InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Impossible Dreams ❯ Chapter Six ( Chapter 6 )
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Author's Notes: I know I haven't posted anything for SIATB yet, but I had this chapter already written up, so I decided to post it rather then wait, since I left you all with a cliff hanger last time. Now you all get to see if Kagome gets rescued, and by who (although I'm sure none of you will be surprised). Thanks for your reviews, as always, and as for SIATB, please just be patient, okay? I'm having a hard time functioning right now and dealing with the death of my coach. These chapters just happened to have already been written, that's why I've posted them. Thanks for your support, and now on with chapter six. Enjoy!
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Title: Impossible Dreams
Author: dolphingirl0113
Chapter: Six
Rating: PG-13 (rated for language, violence, and implied sexual situations)
Disclaimer: I don't own Inuyasha.
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It had been two days since he and Kouga had listened in on the conversation regarding a possible revolt, and Inuyasha was starting to become anxious. There had been no sign of further meetings, and no indication of them choosing to move ahead with their plans of attack, but unlike the wolf, that only made Inuyasha more nervous then ever. When it came to rebellion, as he had learned from experience, once men got it into their heads that they wanted their freedom, they didn't stop until they got what they wanted, and that meant that they were probably still meeting, but now the hanyou didn't know where or when, which resulted in his not knowing a thing about what they planned to do.
He hadn't come across Kagome yet, but then that was not a surprise since the rains had only stopped that afternoon, and until then she had been staying in the mansion while he was still in the slave quarters. But then, it wasn't like he really had a plan if he did see her either. He couldn't exactly just tell her to watch out for her safety because the slaves were planning a revolt that involved her father's death, and possibly hers as well. After all, Inuyasha didn't want to hinder the chances of escape.
"Damn," he cursed out loud for at least the hundredth time since the meeting. His emotions were tied up in knots he couldn't undo, and that not only made him confused, it made him irritable, as Kouga, Shippou, Sango, and Miroku had quickly discovered. Miroku was, of course, used to the hanyou's mood swings and as such didn't care, but the other three would be of the habit of snapping back because they would get offended, and that only made matters worse. In fact, that is why he was currently outside walking around, trying to cool off…he'd had another run in with his `roommates', and figured either he was going to kill someone, or was going to be killed, if he didn't leave for a while.
Memories of the conversation he'd heard replayed in his mind again as he tried to discern any secret meanings in their words, but Inuyasha simply couldn't find anything that could have a double meaning. They had said they would meet the next day, and that had been that, and no matter how much snooping, spying, or asking he did, Inuyasha hadn't found any trace or hint of when or where that next meeting had taken place.
The clouds were starting to roll back in, and Inuyasha glanced up at the sky in disgust, smelling the chance of rain. Clearly, the weather wasn't done completely soaking the area yet, and with a last sigh he decided it would be wise if he turned around and headed back for the hut so that he wouldn't have to spend the next several days drying off his clothes.
Everyone was still sitting as he had left them a little while ago, with Shippou at Kouga's side on the wolf-man's cot, and Sango sitting next to Miroku, the two deep in conversation about something. Inuyasha had noticed the humans were becoming closer, and he could smell, even with his dulled senses, the nervous anticipation on the woman that indicated she was attracted to Miroku. But he didn't really care, so he just shrugged and moved to sit down on his cot.
"So you decided to come back," Shippou commented lazily, rolling over and curling up into a little ball, his sign that he was going to take a nap.
"Keh, of course I did, idiot. It's going to rain again, and I'm not stupid enough to stand outside and get wet."
"Really?" It was Kouga who spoke, with a tremendous amount of sarcasm in his voice, and it was all the hanyou could do to not start another fight. But he wasn't in the mood to get kicked out again, so he just didn't respond at all, lying down on the cot and turning his back to the group, listening to what they were saying while pretending to be asleep.
"Has anything new happened up at the house, Sango?" It was Miroku who asked.
"No, just the usual boring routine whenever it rains. Master Higurashi is playing house for his guests, while Kagome stays up in her room and I bring her meals to her. She just doesn't like socializing with people much any more…it's almost like she's losing the fight within herself, and losing the will to live."
"What do you mean?" Kouga asked, and Sango looked away with a sigh.
"She's sad. She misses her mother more then ever, and frequently she tells me how lonely she is, and that she'd give anything to be a slave, if only for the companionship it would give her."
Inuyasha grunted in response, wondering how stupid the woman must be if she wanted to be a slave. But at the same time, a very small part of his heart tightened in sympathy at the statement that she missed her mother. He missed his too, so maybe that was one thing they had in common.
"Poor Kagome," Shippou's young voice commented, trying to sound wiser then it actually was, and the other's nodded in agreement.
"Sometimes I think we're better off then she is, you know that?" Kouga commented. "I mean, while we don't live in a beautiful mansion, or sleep in soft beds, we do have each other, and we have something to do with our lives. I mean, don't get me wrong, I hate thinking I belong to someone else, but at the same time I can't imagine how she must feel every day, all alone as she watches her father practice something she hates."
"It is true," Miroku added, "She clearly hates slavery. I mean, I've only been here for a little over a month, and I can see that. She does so much to try and help us, despite the warnings of her father, and unlike many of my former mistresses, she doesn't flaunt her wealth and rank by wearing expensive clothing or jewelry. In fact, I don't think I've ever seen her in jewelry."
Sango shook her head. "She doesn't have any. At least, none that belonged to her in the first place. She has a few jewels that belonged to her mother, but whenever I ask her to wear them, just for fun, she refuses. She treasures anything that belonged to her mother, and guards the possessions with her very life."
There was a long silence, and Inuyasha began to wonder if all of them had actually fallen asleep. It certainly would have been easy to do. The fire caused their wet bodies to steam and create a very warm environment, making even the hanyou drowsy. Perhaps sleep wouldn't be such a bad thing…at least for a little while.
Unfortunately, just as he made up his mind and closed his eyes, he heard a large crash and the sound of shattering glass, followed by a piercing scream. Throwing himself off of the cot, he was instantly wide awake, along with Kouga and the others.
"What the hell was that?" Kouga snapped, looking slightly panicked, and as a group all five of them ran outside, where the rain clouds were getting darker, to find that the lower level of the mansion was starting to smoke, and that several of the windows were smashed.
"Oh my god," Miroku whispered, just as another scream filled the air, and as though someone had flipped on a switch, all hell broke loose as slaves ran from their huts to see what was going on, finding the mansion burning. Several people put two and two together and realized it was a revolt in progress, and decided to help, running up to the giant house and running inside through the broken windows and now wide open door. Inuyasha and the others joined them, but rather then wanting to help, they all had only one thing on their minds.
Kagome.
I guess I've got my answer as far as what the men decided to do, Inuyasha thought ruefully before putting all his energy into locating the human woman.
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The pounding had gotten louder, and Kagome's eyes were fixed on her door as she waited for the moment when someone would break it down and come running at her with a knife or a torch blazing with fire. Her heart was in her throat, and panic was quickly overcoming her sense of logic as she looked back at the window and down at the ground, which now seemed so far away, before glancing back at the door again as another loud bang filled the air.
"It's happening," she whispered frantically, knowing this was the revolt that had been coming to her father for years, ever since he started housing slaves. Unfortunately, that didn't make things any easier for her young heart to handle, and Kagome felt her whole body start to shake in fear.
She quickly moved to the other window of her room, only to find that it too was high above the ground, too high for her to jump and still hope to be alive. So what was she to do? What could she do?
"Mama…help me," she whispered, reaching up and putting a hand over her heart to reassure her mind that she was still alive and breathing as she felt the muscle frantically beating in time with her racing pulse.
Another scream reached her ears, and Kagome wanted nothing more then to curl up into a ball of despair on her bed and wait for the end to come. After all, isn't that what she deserved? She should have tried to free the slaves years ago, but had not, because her father wouldn't allow it, instead simply helping them in small ways, like giving them food and blankets and medical attention. Maybe now, she realized, they had only ever seen that as mockery for their station in life, and had never seen her as an ally at all, but just a snobbish daughter of their master.
The thought caused bile to rise in her throat, and before Kagome knew what was happening, she was leaning over and retching all over the floor, her empty stomach still managing to heave something. Ironically, the first thing she thought when she was done was not that she was doomed, but that someone needed to clean up the mess. Focusing on something simple like that helped to calm her panic, and so Kagome went about searching for a rag, while all the while people continued to bang on her bolted door, as well as the rooms around her.
They managed to break into the room that had once belonged to her mother and father, she could hear it because it was next to hers, and they were now pounding on the walls. The angry shouts of men and women filled her ears, and the trembling returned as Kagome turned and started pulling frantically at her large desk, trying to pull it across the floor and finally, after much exhaustion, managing to get it secured in front of her door, hoping that when they failed to break into her room they would give up and go somewhere else.
Unfortunately, Kagome didn't stop to consider the possibility that they would just use other tactics to get to her, because the next thing she knew someone threw a burning torch through one of her windows, and while it shattered the glass, it also instantly caught fire on her curtains. Now the scream that filled the air was her own as she frantically backed away from the far wall, feeling trapped in a way she had never thought possible.
The screams had stopped coming from down below, and Kagome could only imagine in her nightmares why that might be, in her heart knowing that everyone was probably already dead, and that she was the only one left. The thought terrified her, and she hugged her arms around her waist frantically, looking for some way out.
Her curtains, usually so beautiful, were now proving to be her doom as they finally fell off their hangings onto the hardwood floor, spreading the fire as they went, and Kagome could only watch as the hot flames moved across her floor and to her bed, which easily caught on and became like a large mountain of fire, black smoke billowing up toward the ceiling and causing her throat to burn.
Glancing at the door, still braced with the desk, she knew that she was doomed, and felt tears come to her eyes. This wasn't how she had ever imagined herself dying. She had hoped to find someone who loved her, and die with him at her side, comforting her. But not like this. Not all alone, knowing she was hated.
The sounds of voices shouting reached her ears, and Kagome walked as close as she dared to the door, even though the flames were quickly spreading, to try and make out what was going on, coughing slightly as smoke entered her lungs. There was a lot of anger in every voice, as well as a mixture of panic and triumph, but it was one voice in particular that caught her attention, even though she had only heard it a few times in her life.
"Bastards, what have you done to her?" It screamed, and she felt a small glimmer of hope in her breast.
"Inuyasha…" She whispered, sounding completely shocked that he was looking for her. Was it possible? Could he save her?
"If you've killed her, it is your life that will pay the price," another male voice commented, and Kagome felt even more relief in her heart as she recognized Kouga. Her two saviors had come to her aid. Perhaps she wouldn't die yet.
Thinking quickly, she began to bang on a part of the wall that wasn't on fire, hoping someone would hear her as she screamed at the top of her lungs, all the while feeling her head becoming light from the exposure to the smoke, her eyes and nose burning, her throat feeling like the very skin was on fire.
"Help me!" She screamed for all she was worth. "Please…somebody help me!"
Unfortunately, because she was opening her mouth and taking deep breaths of toxic air to shout, Kagome was now also racked with coughing, and her eyes, still burning painfully, began to water, her skin turning hot at the close proximity of the flames now working their way in her direction. She became more frantic then ever. "Help me please!"
Her voice, to her horror, was slowly disappearing, and she feared it would be gone before someone heard her. Her throat hurt, and her lungs felt like they now contained hot coals thanks to the smoke she was inhaling at a frantic pace. But she didn't care. She had to get out of there. She had to live.
"Inuyasha!" She shouted. "Kouga! Help me please! I'm in here! Help me! Inuyasha!"
It was like fate guided her words, because just as she began to feel faint, she watched as a strong pair of arms punched through the wall, followed by a familiar flash of silver and red as Inuyasha leapt into the room, looking frantic. He saw her, and she managed a small smile before her knees buckled, both in relief and exhaustion, and felt her body land against his firmly.
"Kagome," she heard him whisper in concern, but before she could reply, there was a sound that was more frightening then anything else she had heard so far. The sound of wood cracking and giving way, and then the sickening plunge as the floor collapsed and the pair fell.
Screaming, though her voice was fast dwindling to a whisper, Kagome did the only thing she knew, and wrapped her arms frantically around the hanyou's neck, feeling him shift her over against his stomach so that when they landed he took the brunt of the fall on his back, accented by a loud groan of pain that escaped his lips. But he continued to think fast, because once they had fallen, he rolled over and placed Kagome underneath him, spreading his large red coat over them both as parts of the roof and the walls continued to fall on them like flaming rain.
Finally, after a long time, when Kagome thought it was all over for them both, everything stopped, and somewhere in the distance she heard the sound of thunder which would prelude a great storm. It was dark underneath Inuyasha's coat, and Kagome couldn't see or smell anything but him.
"I…Inuyasha?" She whispered nervously, her voice cracking and her lips parched, afraid that he wouldn't answer, and that she would be forced to watch someone else die on top of her, just like her mother had. But that fear was instantly squelched when she heard him groan in discomfort and shift slightly on top of her. She tried again. "Inuyasha…are you alright?"
Her voice was raspy, and not above a whisper as she spoke, but at least she still had a voice, and was relieved when he responded with a grunt. "Keh, of course I'm alright, wench. It takes more then that to kill me."
Slowly he rolled off of her, and a small amount of light illuminated their situation, which was far from ideal. They had not only fallen through the second floor, but through the first as well, and were now down in the basement, covered by debris from the house, with no way out.
Great, she thought inwardly, I'm trapped again.
But all thought fled, because as the panic of falling wore off, an incredible nausea, caused by a mixture of her adrenaline rush and her exposure to the smoke, overtook her senses, causing Kagome to retch for the second time. There was a loud yell of protest, and it didn't take a genius to figure out she had nailed Inuyasha.
"Hey wench, you didn't have to puke all over me," he snapped furiously, and Kagome heard, more then saw, him move to shake himself off, removing his jacket, which had taken the brunt of her stomach assault.
"I…I'm sorry…" she managed before feeling her stomach heave again, her voice raspy and her throat raw. The bile caused her raw throat to burn like flames were inside her very body, and she felt tears come to her eyes in pain.
I must look so horrible right now, a part of her commented, but then she didn't really care, so long as she was alive.
Once she finished and her stomach settled down, she fell over onto her side, curling up into a tiny, exhausted ball, wondering what they could do now. How were they going to get out of there? They had to be covered by at least half the house at that point, all precariously balanced above their heads.
"What do we do now?" She finally whispered aloud, her voice cracking, and as she licked her lips, she felt that they were cracked and parched, the smoke and fire having removed all the moisture from her skin. When she touched her face, she felt clammy, and Kagome, having seen victims of fire and smoke before, knew she must look almost gray at the moment.
"Well we can't just stay here," Inuyasha replied, not really answering her question. But for some reason that didn't matter. It was enough to just hear his voice and know that she wasn't alone.
"I know that," she replied, trying to sound annoyed, but in the end failing as her body was wracked with a coughing fit. Inuyasha put a hand on her back to steady her shaking body, and for some reason the touch soothed her.
"Just stop talking, wench," he commented, sounding annoyed, but also sounding concerned, and so she nodded her head and obeyed, waiting for him to speak again, which he did after several minutes. "I don't know what we're going to do, but there has to be a way to break out of here. If only…" he trailed off, and Kagome turned her head, still lying on the ground, to look at his shadowed form.
"What?"
"It's nothing…"
"Tell me, please…"
He sighed and she saw his head bow as he looked down at his chest, at the black diamond shard around his neck. She could feel its dark energy pulsing from it like waves. "If only I didn't have this damn thing holding me back I could get us out of here in a few seconds."
Kagome nodded and remained silent for several minutes, her eyes trained on the shard, as though it meant to bewitch her. Finally, after several seconds, she reached out and touched it, surprising both herself and Inuyasha. But more then that, the shard began to change, the black fading into a pink color, and Kagome opened her eyes wide in surprise as a tingling sensation ran down her fingers into her hand and arm. Quickly, she withdrew her hand like one who had touched a hot stove.
When she looked up she found Inuyasha staring at her, his eyes wide with awe and amazement. She blushed slightly, and looked away. "I'm sorry…I shouldn't have done that…I mean…touch you without your permission."
But instead of getting mad, like she expected him to, Inuyasha just continued to stare at her in amazement, his hand reaching down to touch the diamond shard, which was slowly returning to its normal black color.
"Kagome," he finally whispered, "How did you do that?"
She gave him a strange look. "Do what?"
"You don't know what you just did?"
"No…" She was beginning to feel very uncomfortable under his shocked expression, his eyes never leaving her as she looked away. "What's the big deal?"
"You have the power to purify the shard," he commented. "I knew it! I knew it after that day when you touched it for just a second. You can free me, Kagome! You can free me!"
Kagome was watching his eyes as they lit up with excitement, and thought that it was the first time she had ever seen his expression that happy before. She swallowed, wincing again at the pain in her throat. "Free you?"
He stopped his celebrations and looked at her. "Yes…free me…unless…" He stopped. "Unless you don't want to free me."
Kagome felt a jolt run through her body. How could he think that? How could he honestly believe that after saving her life she would not free him if she could?
He seemed to read the answer in her eyes, and nodded, his face once more relaxing. He didn't smile, but at the same time his voice was gentle as he spoke. "So you will free me?"
She met his gaze, and felt something inside her shift at the hope in his eyes. It was a hope that was no less innocent then the kind she saw in Shippou's eyes…the innocence of a child. And Kagome couldn't help but feel amazed that a man like him was able to still look like that even after everything he had been through and seen in his life.
"If I can," she finally replied, her voice cracking, "I will free you. But…don't get your hopes up; I'm not exactly sure how to do what you want."
He shook his head. "Just touch the jewel."
"That's all?"
"Yes, and it will become pure, and the hold it has on my abilities will be broken."
Kagome nodded and swallowed, sitting up slightly to reach for his jewel shard, but at the last second she felt his hand on her wrist, the contact sending a shock through her arm, and she glanced up to see his eyes now full of questions. "What is it now? Am I doing something wrong?" She asked, and he blinked.
"No, it's just that, well…you would free me without question? Without even asking first what my intentions are once I am free?"
"Should I ask you that?" She replied, feeling almost irritated. The man had convinced her to free him, but was now telling her she shouldn't? What was the deal?
"I don't know…I mean…as far as you know, I might want to kill you the minute I have my strength back."
Kagome felt her gaze turn soft, realizing he was just confused as to why she trusted him so completely with her safety. It was probably because he had never been trusted by anyone in the whole time he had been a slave. "Inuyasha, if you had wanted to kill me, you wouldn't have saved my life when I was trapped in my room, or again when we fell through the floor."
She thought she saw his cheeks turn a slight pink at the obvious answer, and he looked away, nodding as his mouth formed a silent `o'. She smiled slightly and began to reach for the diamond shard again, feeling its negative energy surround her as she drew closer. How could Inuyasha live with that every day? It was enough to make her sick in the few seconds she was near it.
Without pause, her hand closed over the shard, and Kagome felt the tingling sensation return, this time stronger, and for an instant it was so silent in the room you could have heard a pin drop, but then suddenly Inuyasha let out a loud sigh, and as Kagome removed her hand she saw that the shard was now glowing a bright pink. Shocked by what she had done, Kagome could only stare, but Inuyasha quickly moved to rip the chord from around his neck, handing the shard to her.
"What are you doing?" She asked, staring at the shard in his open palm.
"I want you to take it. That way I have no risk of it capturing me again." Kagome was confused, but nodded and took it, tying it around her wrist, as she did so noticing that the shard glowed even brighter.
Inuyasha took a deep breath through his nose, relishing in the fact that he could once again, for the first time in seven years, smell everything around him. He could smell the rain outside, and the burned wood, and more then that, he could smell Kagome. He could smell vanilla, even though she also reeked of smoke and singed flesh, and he smiled inwardly as he watched her study the shard now hanging from her wrist.
"You smell nice," he commented, and it was only when she turned and gaped at him that he realized he had spoken out loud. He looked away and grunted, trying to end the uncomfortable moment, but was saved when his sharp ears, once more able to hear everything around him, caught the sound of a struggle outside. He also heard Kouga's voice calling for him and Kagome.
Turning to Kagome, who was still staring at him in shock over his comment about her smell, he motioned for her to climb onto his back. "Let's go, they're looking for us."
He could tell she wanted to ask how he knew that, but instead hid her curiosity and obeyed, climbing onto his back and giving him a questioning look as he put his hands under her legs in a piggyback style while she wrapped her arms around his neck. He nodded in approval as she buried her face in his back, clearly understanding that things were going to get rough, and turned to look at one particular spot in the piles of debris where he could smell the rain the strongest, knowing that was the surest way out.
"Hold on, Kagome," he warned, and then pushed off the ground with such speed and strength that Kagome let out a gasp of surprise against his back at the sensation that she was flying. They crashed through the debris and out into the air, and even though her head hurt slightly from where it had been hit rather hard by a piece of wood, she was nonetheless grateful to taste fresh air, her lungs, still burning, seeming to sigh in relief as the rain and sweet smell of wet grass soothed her worn out body.
But what she saw was far from peaceful, and almost as soon as they were out Inuyasha set her down to go and help Kouga as he fought against a mob of men who Kagome recognized as some of the other slaves from her home. But why were they fighting with Kouga? Weren't they all on the same side?
As she turned, Kagome saw several men and women helping each other out of the debris that had once been her house, now smoking and steaming as the fires died under the pelting rain, and tears came to her eyes. Her father was clearly dead, as were Hojo and his parents, and while she had not loved any of them like she had loved her mother, she wept for their lost souls anyway.
Shouts rang out, and she watched as people realized they had succeeded in destroying the home, meaning they were now free. A small part of her felt happy for them, even as her own life lay in ruins, smoldering like the mess that had been her home, but she still couldn't manage a smile on her face, instead just watching as the now former slaves jumped up, danced, hugged, and kissed one another in joy.
Unfortunately, fate would not let her rest, because just as she fell to her knees to say a prayer for her lost family and friends, one of the slaves, a man, noticed her and frowned, moving to speak to someone else, until several of them were looking at her, clearly unsure of what to do about the fact that she was still alive. Finally, seeming to make a decision, they moved in her direction, and Kagome heard their footsteps approaching, turning her head to see a mob of about fifteen men giving her hard stares.
There was no mercy in their eyes, and Kagome felt her body shiver. What were they going to do? Surely they wouldn't kill her, not after all she had been through? Fate wouldn't be that cruel to her, would it? To have trapped her amid smoke and flames, terrified her beyond her mind, thrown her down into the basement of her home as the rest of the mansion came crashing down around her ears, and then freed her, only to have her killed? Fate would not do that to her. She just had to believe that.
And yet, the looks in their eyes, the eyes of men who had killed already and suddenly had no qualms about doing it again, caused her to realize that, if she valued her life, she would run. And so, rising to her feet, Kagome began to fearfully back away.
"Please…please don't hurt me…" She begged, walking backward but nearly falling as she tripped over a large stone. They continued to advance, but she noticed her pleas were affecting them slightly as sympathy crossed the faces of some of the older men. "I…I won't force you into slavery any more…I promise…I'm happy you're free…just don't hurt me, please."
Her body gave way, and she collapsed onto the ground, telling Kagome that even if she wanted to run she could not have, not with her lungs still burning with smoke, her nose filled with the stench of burning wood and her legs sore from being battered by falling debris. And so, instead, she turned and sat on her knees, letting the rain fall on her body, and waited, her life in the hands of a mob of angry men.
Inuyasha saw none of it as he helped Kouga fight off several men. The wolf-man, thinking Kagome and Inuyasha had died when the second floor of the house collapsed, had immediately gone after the men responsible for setting her room on fire in the first place, successfully killing one and wounding many more. But the shard around his neck prevented him from doing too much serious damage, and Inuyasha, with his returning strength, managed to stop him.
"She's alive, Kouga," he snapped, "So stop fighting. There's no need, Kagome's alright."
The wolf-man finally stopped and turned to look at Inuyasha, his eyes full of relief, but also clouded with warning. "If you lie to me, dog-face, you'll pay…"
"I'm not lying to you, wolf, so get over your paranoia. Kagome's alive, I saved her." He hit his chest proudly. "And she freed me."
Kouga opened his eyes wide in surprise, staring at the chest that had once been restrained by the black diamond shard. "Your shard…how?"
"Kagome freed me, like I said, baka." Inuaysha recalled the way she had done so without hesitation, and felt a small amount of warmth in his chest. But he pushed it aside.
"Where is Kagome?"
"Right over here…" Inuyasha turned around, but suddenly felt his whole being filled with dread as he noticed a large circle of men where he had left Kagome a few minutes ago. Running over, he pushed his way into the circle to find…nothing. No Kagome, no body, nothing. So where was she?
"Where is Kagome?" He asked heatedly, and the men turned blank eyes to him that told Inuyasha more then he needed to know. He glanced down and saw little footprints in the mud, already washing away thanks to the rain, and felt himself growl in annoyance, but also in a certain amount of unfamiliar fear.
Kagome was gone…