InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ In the Heat of Passion ❯ Chapter 8: I can't give up ( Chapter 8 )

A/N: Okay guys! Hit me! Bash me! Do whatever you must to hate me, but I sincerely do apologize for not updating recently. I found out that a guy I was kind of dating had been shot in Iraq so I have been spending a lot of my spare time with him when he came home. Also, I have finally come to the realization that this is my damn story and I feel like writing it….lol! I have to admit that I did get rather discouraged for a while. I didn't know if you wanted me to continue or not, but I now realize that this is more of a hobby for me so I will continue to write it despite negative feedback. I do however thank you for your criticism…just could you please try to keep it to constructive rather than destructive? You may be reading this on a computer, but a machine didn't write it. I do, however, appreciate any type of suggestions you may have. Sometimes you guys can come up with some really great ideas and I just have to use them. So please continue to read and review…because I am going to continue to write! I have no excuse now…so I will do everything within my power to update more often. THIS AND FURTHER CHAPTERS WILL BE FOR ALL OF YOU FANS WHO STUCK WITH ME! LOVE YOU GUYS! I WILL CONTINUE TO UPDATE FOR YOU!

Chapter 8

That night, the group slept uneasily next to a dimming fire. A wolf could be heard howling in the distance, and a hooting owl added a somewhat eerie feeling to the clouded night sky. A thunderstorm could be heard in the distance and a swift breeze would sweep through their blankets ever so often. Though the night had a chilling effect, it could not compare to the chills that ran through the veins of two young teens. Kagome had literally passed out to fall asleep and now tossed and turned in her blanket. Her emotions had finally taken over her body, releasing a defense mechanism that forced her to pass out so she wouldn't have to hurt any more. Sleep wasn't an option for the young dog demon that sat in a tree not far from the camp. He dare not close his eyes, nor did they want to close. His mind raced at the speed of a thousand wild horses, and nothing could console the constant anguish and regret found in his heart. To say he was confused would be an understatement. To say Kagome was hurt would be a lie. The poor girl was devastated…so devastated she had passed out on more than one occasion. Inuyasha understood perfectly who was hurt in the situation, but that was what made him hurt even more. His life meant nothing compared to hers. That is why he had risked it for her on so many occasions, and now he had hurt the one thing he held precious in the twisted world in which he lived. The night called to him, begging him to fly into the night sky and be lost forever, never to be hurt again…but that would mean leaving Kagome. It was something he could not bare to do. He would die one day. He knew that much, but he would not allow himself to die without Kagome understanding his emotions, his feelings…his feelings for her. Kagome would realize that it was all a huge accident, one big mistake. He would see to it that she would at least comprehend the fact that he had no idea what he was doing when the terrible event took place. An image of Kagome's terrified countenance after Inuyasha had snapped back to reality flashed through his head. He shook his head trying to remove the image, but he still saw her…the hurt, the dread, the sadness, her feeling of betrayal. He could feel her emotions. A tear slid down his cheek.

`I didn't mean to, Kagome!' Inuyasha thought. `It…it wasn't even really me! I would never hurt you! You know that! I would give my life for you!' He sighed and looked down to his sleeping companions. Sango lay next to Kagome with Shippo and Kirara curled in between the two. Miroku was asleep sitting upright against a nearby tree with Myouga asleep on his knee. Suddenly, something yellow caught his attention. He looked over to find Kirara staring at him from in between Kagome and Sango.

`How does she see me?' he thought, but then turned away to look into the sky. Not even a minute later, he heard something below him. He looked down.

"Meow!" Kirara said as she began climbing the tree up to Inuyasha. Inuyasha stared at the demon cat in confusion.

"Meow!" she said again when she finally reached him. Inuyasha grabbed the cat by the fur on her neck and sat her in his lap.

"What's with you?" he asked. Kirara tilted her head, then rubbed her head on Inuyasha's hand. Her ears drooped as she looked up at him and purred in an effort to express her feelings of pity for her demon friend.

"Oh," Inuyasha said sadly. "Don't worry, Kirara. I am not going anywhere any time soon. I'm okay. I will watch over you guys from afar, but just in case I can't get there quick enough, take extra special care of Kagome for me okay." Tears filled the hanyou's eyes. Kirara took a step towards the hanyou and meowed again. Her ears drooped even lower. Inuyasha dried up his face and patted the little cat on her head.

"I never thanked you by the way," Inuyasha said. "If you hadn't helped get Sango and Miroku there to stop me…I could have…" Inuyasha's voice trailed off. He didn't want to think about what would have happened. Kirara growled, interrupting Inuyasha's thoughts, telling him not to think about it. Inuyasha smiled the best he could considering his mood. He rubbed Kirara's head.

"It's okay, girl. Everything is going to be okay. Myouga told me some things that could help correct things. Let's just cross our fingers," Inuyasha said winking and crossing his fingers. Kirara tilted her head to the side in confusion. "Oh, sorry. I meant let's cross our claws." Kirara's ears perked up and her tail wagged happily from side to side as she placed her paw on Inuyasha's crossed fingers then jumped down from the tree. Inuyasha watched as the little demon cat scampered back to her original place of rest, looked at Inuyasha one last time, then curled up, and went to sleep. Inuyasha had to smile to himself a little though his face never showed it. He knew he wouldn't be smiling for quite some time, but he did have to admit that his friend were being pretty understanding about the whole situation.

`I guess they just realize that this entire thing is just a really bad situation,' Inuyasha thought. `But they don't really even have to do that. They had every excuse in the world to cast me away forever, but they didn't. I guess I have better friends in them than I thought. I just hope Kagome can one day see it their way, too. I just hope she can some how find it in her heart to forgive me…if that's even possible. That girl has the biggest heart I have ever known to be in a person. That's the only reason I have hope. If it were anyone else, I would give up.' Inuyasha looked down at Kagome. She had finally managed to settle down. `How could I have hurt such a precious creature? Why couldn't my mind overcome it? I don't even remember what happened. Myouga better be right about all of this…for his sake.'

* * *

Morning came quickly for the traveling companions. No one slept well the night before and they all were now in a state of confusion as to what to do next. Kirara had traveled down to the river earlier and had yet to return. Shippo moaned next to Kagome's still slumbering form as Sango and Miroku began to clean up camp.

"What do you think we should do?" Sango asked Miroku. "Should we continue on with the shard hunt or should we go back to the village for a few days?" Miroku pondered Sango's question for moment then shrugged his shoulders.

"I haven't a clue," he said. "It would be rather awkward to continue the shard hunt without Inuyasha, but I don't want Kagome to think we are returning to the village because of all of this. I'm afraid it would make her feel worse, as if she were holding us back." Sango nodded.

"I know," she said. "I don't know what to do. Should we ask her what she would like to do? I mean, she has to know that we cannot continue the shard hunt without Inuyasha." Miroku nodded.

"That's right," he said. "Lady Kaede said that she and Inuyasha have to work together in order to get the shards back. I understand why now. Kagome can sense the shards. So without Kagome, Inuyasha would never find the shards. But without Inuyasha, Kagome would never be capable of fighting for the shards. She'd die trying."

"So then I guess continuing the hunt for the shards is useless, huh?" Sango said. Miroku nodded his head.

"Yeah," Miroku said. "I mean I guess you and I could always try to take on the demons, and Inuyasha said that he wouldn't be far away. Nevertheless, I still think that it's best that we wait to continue the shard hunt." Sango nodded.

"I agree," she said. "But what now? Back to the village? Stay here?"

"That we can ask Kagome when she wakes up," Miroku said. "We will let her decide that. She may prefer to go back to the village since it is closer to the well…Oh God!"

"What is it, Miroku?" Sango asked somewhat startled by his sudden outburst.

"The well!" Miroku said. "Kagome could try to go back through to her time!"

"I hadn't thought about that!" Sango said also alarmed. "I mean…I guess I wouldn't blame her for wanting to go back. She would probably be more at ease in her own time." Miroku nodded.

"Well, we should just quit guessing and let her decide," Miroku said. Sango nodded.

"I agree," Sango said.

"Agree about what?"

Sango and Miroku looked up to see Kagome sitting up in her sleeping bag rubbing her eyes. Shippo had also awakened, now sitting in Kagome's lap. Kagome yawned and looked at them, waiting for their answer.

"Well, Kagome," Miroku began, "we were just wondering what you would like to do now. Would you like to continue the hunt for the shards or would like to stay here or return to the village?" Kagome looked at him as if the question had caught her off guard. Kagome more or less just followed the group most of the time. She rarely led the group anywhere unless she sensed a jewel shard nearby.

"Uh…I really hadn't thought about it," she said. "I still feel terrible. I can't really think straight yet." Sango walked over to her companion and rested a comforting hand on her shoulder.

"That's only to be expected," Sango said. "Would you like to stay here or return to the village for a few days?" Kagome's eyes lit up when Sango mentioned the village.

"Yes! The village would be great! I haven't seen Kaede in a while and it would be nice to use some of her herbs to make tea," Kagome said with a weak smile.

"Great!" Miroku said walking over to the two girls. "We will leave shortly then."

"Meow!" the three heard Kirara shout. They looked up to find Kirara running towards them excitedly.

"What is it, Kirara?" Sango asked with a smile. She then noticed that Kirara was carrying something.

"Meow!" Kirara said excitedly again. Sango looked closer and realized that a long string of fish had been tied around Kirara's neck. Kirara proudly sat down and displayed the fish to everyone.

"Wow, Kirara!" Shippo exclaimed. "That's a lot!"

"Yeah it is," Sango said with a smile. "But how…" Sango thought for a minute about how Kirara could have possibly caught so many fish in such a short amount of time and have the capability of tying the string around her neck. Miroku smiled as he walked passed Sango. He bent down next to Kirara and lifted a long silver strand of hair from Kirara's fur.

"I think Kirara had a little help," Miroku said with a smile. Sango gasped and Kagome just stared. Kagome looked up into the treetops of the forest in search of the hiding dog demon.

`Inuyasha?' she thought. When she finally looked back to the others, Sango and Miroku were already rebuilding the fire to cook the fish. Shippo jumped off of Kagome's lap and scurried over to help.

"Come on, Kagome," Shippo said stopping half way to Sango and Miroku. Kagome smiled weakly.

"No, thanks," she said. "I am not hungry." Sango, Miroku, Kirara, and Shippo looked at Kagome. She sighed and stood. She brushed herself off, then solemnly began to walk away from camp.

"Are you sure, Kagome?" Sango pleaded. "You need to eat something to keep your strength up."

"Thanks, Sango," Kagome said. "But I am not in any mood to eat or keep my strength up." With that, she walked away towards the river.

"Kagome!" Miroku called out to her, but it was too late. He sighed and continued working with the fire.

"Do you think someone should go with her?" Sango asked as she watched her friend walk away.

"Don't worry," he said. "She's not alone."

A/N: Tada! Okay, well I will try to get the next chapter up by Monday or Tuesday….I am going out of town. Read and review! Tell me what you think I should write next! Tell me how you think the story should go! See ya!