InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ inuyasha's crew members journal ❯ day 1-100 ( Chapter 1 )

[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]
Inuyasha's crew member's journal

diablodude: just read it, its very funny.
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day 1 : I joined kagome's crew today, she is HOT, but not as hot as my fresh pizza or as cold hearted as my cold keg of beer.

day 3 :i was attacked by a flock of demented seagulls today.i've never been so white.

day 6 : the beer dissapeared mysteriously today. i fear for the worse.

day 8 : miroku declared all shall be pantsless and none agreed.

day 9 : i figured where all of the beer had gone........

day 11 :food is running low,kagome has sent the rest of the crew to go sawdust hunting. out of twenty men, only eleven returned alive. i continue to chew mindlessly on my stale pizza

day 14 : i realize now that i'm alone. the crew spends most of their time below deck, licking sawdust off of rats. my pizza somehow remains perfectly preserved through some insane act of nature.

day 17 : i found a secret storage room in the hull that contains lots of lemons. i should use these to prevent scurvy.

day 19 : i'm sick of lemons.

day 20 : it started snowing today,the crew is almost entirely still, i think its to preserve heat.my feet are cold.

day 24 : i've been working on a snowman army to keep my sanity.its not working.

day 26 : i had a arguement with the snow general. he declared war on me.

day 29 :i fashioned a blade out of my pizza , i call it tetsuiga, i fought with it valiantly and lost an arm, but their forces are starting to overpower me.

day 32 : i formed a alliance with the sun today. my sanity is still in question.

day 35 : the snowman army is beginning to slow, it may have something to do with my alliance with the sun.

day 37 : the war is over. i have defeated them.

day 40:i built a new arm out of rat skeletons,lemon peels and dead crew members. their death was not completely pointless.

day 46 : we passed a island today filled with naked chicks having sex on the shore line. i tried to stop but the wheel was frozen. i will always remember the day that i almost made it to heaven...... why is kagome looking so mad at me?

day 49 : the hull of the ship is frozen solid. the crew still isn't moving except for kagome.

day 53 : i saw a island in the distance. if it's anything like where we passed, i hope we crash into it.

day 57 : the island was actually a iceberg with no naked people. this voyage sucks.

day 60 : my feet tried to attack my new arm in warfare. my other arm contains my "peacekeeper 3000"

day 63 : my feet attempted to sleep with my new arms girlfriend.thanks to my trusty "peacekeeper 3000" i no longer have feet.

day 68 : the wheel defrosted, but because of a recent argument with my "peacekeeper 3000" arm, i no longer have the capacity to steer.

day 71 : i snuck up on my "peacekeeper 3000" arm and stabbed it. my skin is now a strange red color.

day 74 : note to self : recently deceased crew members make a great source of vitamins.

day 79 : sesshomaru got up today and asked me to help him escape the hull, which is a shame because i planned on eating him.

day 85 : i used my trusty pizza sword to free sesshomaru and freed several other members,twenty-one in all, but after i was through with them twenty remained.

day 88 : i see another land in the distance, i hope it's not another iceberg, because it looks difficult to avoid.

day 92 : i freed the lemons. they thanked me gratefully. i realize my sanity is no more.

day 94 : i gave my sword a burial under the hull.

day 96 : the ship is sinking, i wonder why......

day 98 :i chewed on my dismembered limbs today. my feet are soaked.

day 100 : we reached asia. although deprived of naked chicks, i think it may have been worthwhile. i said goodbye to the lemons and we hugged and then i walked into the mental institute. home at last.

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diablodude:th at was funny, plz review.