InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ It's All Over Now ❯ Chapter 1 ( Chapter 1 )

Well, it's all over now

We're through somehow

Too bad, I couldn't solve your riddle in time

It's all over now

 

 

 

The chill in the breeze was unnaturally bitter that night.

 

`Or maybe it's not the cold that's bitter…'

 

Kagome stood at the entrance to her modest home, leaning against the doorframe with her head resting on the wood's unforgiving edges. She was alone, completely, and utterly alone tonight. The hut was secluded in the forest, near the ancient well. The once welcoming privacy of the forest's depths now seemed oppressing. Even the hums of the night's creatures were dulled. Kagome gripped her thin robe closer to her fragile body. How could it be so cold in the middle of the summer?

 

Her teeth chattered, the pinching sound of enamel hitting enamel echoing in the front room. Her tired eyes closed as she breathed deep, taking in the pine and soil rich scents of the feudal era. With a sigh, the young miko from the future released the bamboo mat covering of the door and slipped back inside. The air was stale with misuse.

 

`I've never wanted anything other than his happiness…'

 

Her dull eyes stared helplessly at the chest in the corner of the one bedroom wooden home. The brown depths of her listless orbs sparkled slightly as she opened the lid. Inside were her most precious belongings. The white wedding robes Sango so painstakingly sewed for her, Shippou's drawings, and pictures of her family. Kagome fingered the cool silken cloth of the white robes. The corners of her mouth tweaked up in a sad smile.

 

`I was so happy that day…so…unbelievably happy.'

 

Digging to the dusty bottom Kagome pulled out her old and horribly tattered yellow backpack. The memories it held were precious, forever ingrained in every tear and every stain. She took the worn bag and carefully began gathering what was most dear to her, what belonged to her and her alone. Kagome wrapped the pictures of her smiling family in the midst of her day yukatas. She never did see them again, after falling through for the final time two years ago. After a painful three year separation, her family understood. It seemed so worth it then, to give up everything in the future to live out her life in the past. She should have known. The past, as it were, was meant to remain the past. She should have learned to let go.

 

`Maybe then I wouldn't be in such a mess…'

 

Her bitter thoughts quickly ran out of steam. She never could hold a grudge.

 

`No. I wouldn't change what happened for the world. Only maybe, if it had been possible to hold onto this feeling a little bit longer…'

 

Kagome slowly folded the rest of her clothing, all timeless like her. She long ago gave up her futuristic apparel. The miko looked like she belonged in this era all along. Carefully slipping Shippou's drawings in the side pocket, she gathered up the remaining blunts of his crayons. Only an inch of blue and a few stubs of red and yellow were left. A few pieces of jewellery were tossed inside, her comb and the last block of soap she owned. She stuffed the extra silk blanket they owned on the top to cushion everything precious within. Slowly, Kagome closed the chest, leaving Sango's handiwork behind.

 

`It would be too painful…I'm sorry Sango…I know you worked so hard on it…'

 

Lastly, with barely constrained tears glistening and threatening to spill over her lashes, the few small articles of clothing she had begun to sew were tucked safely inside. Kagome buckled the bag, its zipper long since broken. With a final round through the house, her fingers touching the splintered wood of the east wall, the thin paper of the shoji windows they'd painstakingly sewn together, and the cool metal of their belongings, Kagome whispered her silent goodbyes. Her foot brushed against the heavy comfort of their futon. She bit her lip to hold in the whimper.

 

It felt like leaving a part of her behind. Truthfully she didn't know exactly what she was going to do. Where she was going to go in the end. But she knew she had to leave. Sango and Miroku would no doubt take her in. Until she managed to get back on her feet, she knew she had a place in their home. Desperate was her need to seek refuge there. In the comforting arms of her family.

 

 

***

 

In the cover of darkness Kagome planned her escape. She wanted to be as subtle as possible, and make the transition as gentle as she could. It was well past two in the morning, and everything was still within in the night. She picked up the heavy bag with a grimace and cradled it against her side. Carefully slipping on her wooden sandals, Kagome parted the bamboo covering and slipped outside. She gasped, and dropped her bag.

 

“Inu…yasha…” she whispered faintly.

 

His eyes snapped to attention. The eerie golden glow fiercely processing the scene before him. Why was Kagome up so late? Why was…was that her bag? A gripping sense of foreboding flushed through his body. Adrenaline kicked into high gear as his fear all but rippled through him.

 

“Kagome?... What the fuck do you think you're doing out here so late!” his harsh growl broke the silence of the forest.

 

He took a step forward, and Kagome stepped back, clutching her rounded belly protectively. Her eyes, wise beyond her years, took in his appearance. His dishevelled hair, messy clothing, and kiss swollen lips. The panicked look of guilt condemned him.

 

“Inuyasha…” she whispered painfully. Her eyes watered, tears trickling down her pale cheeks. She knew. She knew as soon as he left her side that night. But the evidence of it all was too hard to bear.

 

“Look, Kagome-” he reached a clawed hand forward, desperate for her to understand. Kagome shrunk back. The frightened look searing him to the core.

 

“I don't want to know.” she said plainly, words squeezed painfully through her parched throat.

 

“It didn't mean anything!” he cried with wide, disbelieving eyes. Acidic guilt clawed at his insides. He relished in the pain.

 

“When you brought her back with the jewel…I thought it was over between us.” her eyes were downcast as she slowly bent to pick up the straps of her bag. “But then, you chose me, and made me the happiest person in the world Inuyasha.” He gritted his teeth as he fought the urge to pounce and grab her in his embrace. “Two years…” she mumbled, “we've been married two years, did you know?”

 

“Of course I fucking know!” he spat. The dirty regret manifesting into his anger. He was enraged with himself. But Kagome always got the brunt of it.

 

“I would have done anything for you. Anything Inuyasha.”

 

“Then stay!” he cried. Inuyasha fell to his knees and inched forward. Kagome watched him warily through her bangs. His trembling hands slowly cupped the protruding belly of his mate. “I swear Kagome, it didn't mean a fucking thing. It just happened once! And it'll never happen again, I swear it!”

 

A gentle hand soothed his messy hair.

 

“The only thing I can't do for you, not anymore, is let you walk freely between me and her. You can't hold me in the day and crawl to her in the dark of night Inuyasha!” Kagome's deadly whisper ripped his heart apart. He knew it was a fucking stupid thing to do. But he wasn't thinking. It had just seemed so natural at the time. The urge, the need.

 

“No, I swear, Kagome, I swear. I'll never so much as look in the same direction as her again. Just stay, please, just stay!” his whine splintered her resolve the tiniest bit. His cheek rested painfully tender upon her belly, his ears twitching to catch a sound of the life held within.

 

“It's fate.” she stated calmly, gently prying his hands from her. “We've toyed with it as long as we could. You were meant to be with her Inuyasha. I know you tried, and that's enough for me.”

 

“No! You stupid wench! Listen to me! I never wanted her! Just you! O-only you! Tonight…” he growled as she backed away, his head falling in remorse, “it was, a mistake! A stupid fuck up!”

 

Kagome shook her head sadly. Her small smile pained him. He could handle anger, rejection, anything vile she could throw at him. He wanted her to blame him for his depraved infidelity. But the gentle understanding in her eyes froze his blood. He couldn't live without her, he just couldn't.

 

“You'll never be able to resist her pull for long Inuyasha. I can't bare the thought of having to turn the other way every year, two years, ten? It doesn't matter. I can't love you as much as I do,” her sob made his stomach drop, “…and willingly let you lie in another woman's embrace.”

 

“Kagome…” he whined. With a deep breath, Kagome bundled the bag on her side again. She swiped her face with the back of her hands and cleared her throat.

 

“You can-” she faltered slightly, “see the baby whenever you want.” the quiet whisper turned his world upside down. “All that I ask is that you love him or her. They were conceived with love, and it shouldn't know anything else, no matter what happens between us.” Inuyasha looked up, hurt flashing across his features in a palpable throb.

 

“I'm not letting you go!” he roared suddenly, shaking the leaves on the branches of the trees.

 

“Inuyasha…” with her free hand she caressed his flushed cheek tenderly, her thumb smoothing over the swollen lips he used to kiss another, “be happy.”

 

The muscles in his jaw spasmed. He clenched his teeth tightly together to keep the cry of utter despair from echoing forth. The unwelcome burn behind his eyes felt dry and scratchy.

 

“I'm sorry, I'm so fucking sorry Kagome!” his last desperate plead tightened her throat.

 

“Me too.”

 

 

***

 

 

Generally, I'm a happy-ending kind of person. But something about this blistering cold and mountainous pile of homework (stopping to write this fic didn't help in the least, haha) set me on edge. Hopefully it wasn't too terrible. I've taken a long break from fiction writing.

 

I purposely left it allusive so you could come up with your own reasons for his betrayal. But if you're like me, no matter how creative I get, I still like a solid answer from the author. Basically, it takes place five years after the journey is completed. Kagome stayed her three in the future, and Inuyasha waited. The deviation from the manga starts then. I'm going with the idea that Inuyasha kept the jewel (that became a physical object again) and wished Kikyou back to life, kind of a way for him to repent his sins. But he waited for Kagome faithfully, and stayed true until this night. His reasons for the infidelity? I think he tries as hard as he can, and truly loves Kagome, but Kikyou has some sort of power over him that he'll never be able to push away.

 

Oh and I totally forgot. I in no way own Inuyasha.

 

It's All Over Now, by The Perishers