InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ It's All Over Now ❯ Chapter 2 ( Chapter 2 )

Inuyasha looked on with sombre eyes. Kagome gave a gentle smile as Shippou squeaked with excitement.

 

“I can feel it!” the kit's distant cry pierced his heart.

 

A weight had settled on his shoulders since that night. He tried to rationalize it, deny it, anything to settle that nauseating feeling. But no matter what he did that gnawing guilt ate at him from the inside out. He fucked up and he knew it.

 

 

***

 

 

“Inuyasha...”

 

“Listen, you keep it.” The word wench nearly rolled off his tongue before he could contain it. The pained look in her eyes made him realize she missed it too. “I-it's yours. I built it for you.”

 

With a sob Kagome covered her eyes and gleaming cheeks with her voluminous sleeves. She hadn't wanted to cry, but the emotions were overwhelming her. Whatever tiny shred of hope Inuyasha held sparked viciously to life. She hurt too...maybe there was still hope? He desperately wanted to reach out and console her, to calm her acidic tears and make all her pain disappear. But how could he when he was the very source?

 

“Where-” her muffled plea began.

 

“I'll figure it out. I always do.”

 

Kagome looked up with teary eyes. Inuyasha swore internally. How could he have done this to her? How could he have caused her so much anguish? He was supposed to protect her dammit! The demon inside him thrashed and howled. It hurt for him, hurt for his mate. Dim golden eyes looked longingly at the woman who cradled his heart in her gentle hands. What had she ever done but sacrifice for him?

 

A silent moment passed between the two as the each evaluated how far they'd fallen. She wanted to ask him why. Why he went to her, why she wasn't enough for him. The questions were desperately clawing their way to the surface but she forced them down. She knew he hurt too.

 

 

***

 

 

Kagome giggled as Shippou's swishy tail twitched back and forth. Inuyasha felt his stomach drop at the sound. It had been a month since he heard that near musical laugh. Hidden behind the lush, late summer brush Inuyasha silently watched as the mother of his child entertained the other inhabitant of her home.

 

“What's happening?” Shippou asked excitedly.

 

“The baby has hiccups, the poor thing.” Her gentle, maternal murmur made it hard for Inuyasha to breathe. He should be there to soothe his own pup. `Fuck...'

 

“How much longer Kagome?” Shippou asked with wide, hopeful eyes. The young mother to be bit her lip to contain her silly smile and kissed the top of Shippou's head.

 

“Kaede-bachan says it won't be more than a couple weeks now.” Shippou grinned and climbed onto her lap, his small hand possessively covering her swollen belly.

 

“I'll be the best big brother ever Kagome.” His serious tone and childish conviction made warmth blossom in her heart.

 

“You'll protect him or her right?”

 

“Of course,” he admonished, “especially since Inuyasha's gone now.”

 

 

***

 

 

Inuyasha held his breath to prevent the whimper from escaping. He fell against the rough bark of the tree behind him and slid to the ground. Claws gripping the dirt beneath him, Inuyasha swore inwardly. He could smell the sharp spike in Kagome's scent. Her features remained passive but her scent gave away her true feelings.

 

 

***

 

 

He remained hidden for the remainder of the day, sitting limply at the bottom of the giant oak and listening to the bustle inside the house. On some level, he believed Kagome knew he was close. She always had an uncanny knack for sensing his presence. They never acknowledged one another and he oddly preferred that. He wasn't ready yet. He had exhausted every possible excuse within his own battles. Nothing was a good enough reason for her. He simply fucked up.

 

It happened gradually, the affair. Inuyasha snorted to himself. He doubted it even counted as an affair. They started talking, about mundane things really. Never in secrecy, never truly alone. He didn't hide it, and Kagome knew they had started a more friendly relationship than the distant one they maintained before. Kagome was supportive, naturally, and saw it as progress. `It's okay Inuyasha, don't be silly. I don't mind!'

 

Then one day Kikyou brought up the what-ifs. It made his head spin, reopened old wounds. He lashed out at first, repulsed by the very thought of another life. He hadn't spoken to her for nearly a week after that incident. But once he saw her weary eyes gazing at him in apology, he slinked back and they starting talking once more. This time, at least in the beginning, he wasn't as eager to divulge the rekindled friendship to Kagome.

 

They remained proper, never touched and never veered into inappropriate territory. Their weekly conversations soon became daily. He didn't think much of it. It never affected the time he spent with his wife so it didn't warrant any real cause for concern in his view.

 

Then when Kagome was nearly seven months along Kaede forbade Kagome and him to lie with one another. It made him edgy at first, but Kagome took it with humour. He thought she was insufferable. She thought he was insatiable.

 

 

***

 

 

“Inuyasha!” her feminine giggle didn't help matters any. “Stop! You know what Kaede said! It's bad for the baby.”

 

“I'm not doing anything.” He murmured from the crook of her neck.

 

“You are too! Quit it before you get yourself all worked up!” Inuyasha crawled up her body, nudging her nose with his.

 

“Too late.” He grinned.

 

His lips grazed her cheekbone before settling to suckle the tender flesh of her neck. Kagome hummed beneath him, gripped his bare shoulders to anchor herself.

 

“I-Inuyasha...” her breathy sigh ignited a fierce desire within him. “W-we can't...”

 

“I know wench, just shut up,” his knuckle grazed her folds, “I just wanna take care of you.” Her deep moan stiffened him.

 

“Fuck woman...”

 

 

***

 

 

Kagome did the best she could to sate her husband. But fate played in a cruel way. The rounder she got, the less she was allowed to do. But as her belly grew, Inuyasha found her irresistible. He craved her, was desperate for her touch.

 

 

***

 

 

That night had been like every other. He lay beside his wife and held her as she snoozed. But as he inspected her in the pale moonlight his skin grew feverish. He had kissed her temple, that much he remembered. Then left the hut with the intention of just getting some air.

 

What happened next was a series of coincidences. But that wasn't a good enough excuse was it? He wasn't thinking when he stumbled across her at the river. Why the fuck was she there so late anyways? He felt drugged by his desires and the urge had felt so natural. She looked like her. The irony of the situation was devastating.

 

The what-ifs, coupled with his blind need, still made a pathetic excuse. But it happened and she knew before he even made it home. He didn't know if he planned on hiding it. Didn't know which was crueller - telling his pregnant wife of his indiscretions, or lying to keep her happy. But Kagome was always perceptive. And that night, his heart shattered along with hers.

 

 

***

 

 

“Inuyasha.” A quiet voice whispered. Said hanyou rubbed his scratchy eyes and sat up straight.

 

“Wha-“ he murmured incoherently.

 

“Kagome's already asleep. You should probably leave now.”

 

Blurry golden eyes inspected the sombre kit before him. Shippou didn't even bother to pester him anymore. For some reason, that hurt the hanyou. Inuyasha cleared his throat and scratched the back of his neck uncomfortably. The two stared at one another for a few moments, simply soaking in the familiarity. With a nearly inaudible sigh Shippou turned towards the direction of the hut. After a few paces he paused. Without turning he whispered,

 

“I know you didn't mean to hurt her Inuyasha.” The hanyou remained silent. “It sucks to grow up without a dad.” Without further explanation or direction, Shippou left Inuyasha to ponder his own fate.

 

 

***

 

 

I came across this story completely randomly. I felt the need to expand on Inuyasha's pain and to tell his side of the story. Hopefully you enjoyed it.