InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ It's my Life ❯ Inuyasha's heart ( Chapter 1 )

[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]

Disclaimer: Ok, now obviously I don’t own this, any original characters that pop up, yeah those are mine. But everyone else, those are all owned by Rumiko Takahashi. Which in case you didn’t know, isn’t me. I make no money off of this.

Pairings: Well this will be a yaoi, but….I haven’t quite made up my mind.

By the way this fic was partly inspired by Snagglaugh’s “Uke” and partly by my own annoyance by the way Inuyasha is treated, both in the official story, and fan-fiction. Hope you enjoy.




It was times like these that Inuyasha truly had to wonder why he even bothered to wake up in the morning. Times meaning situation, situation being driven so hard into the earth that it left craters.

“SIT! SIT! SIT!” Kagome shouted, and with every single utterance of that accursed word, Inuyasha was crushed deeper and deeper into the earth, as if some massive titan was stomping on him. Face buried in raw earth, Inuyasha pushed back with all his strength, arms shaking with effort. His back felt like it was breaking, the pressure was ungodly. But to make matters worse, he couldn’t breathe, and if he was being brutally honest with himself, that was probably the worst part. The inability to breathe, the burning feeling in his lungs, and the blind panic that rose within him, he couldn’t help but wonder if one of these times his so called -friend- Kagome wouldn’t over do it and suffocate him. Then as quick as it came, the pressure released, and Inuyasha forced his head out of the dirt, breathe coming in, in deep raged breaths.

“God….damn it.” He choked out, for several seconds he did nothing, nothing but lay there and breathe. Then slowly, painfully he crawled up and out of the hole. Taking a look around Inuyasha took in the sight of his pack, his supposed friends. Shippo was laughing his ass off at Inuyasha’s latest -sitting- all the while sucking on….oh what did Kagome call it? Candy? Miroku and Sango were sitting together on a log, Miroku rubbing the bridge of his nose muttering something about “the pigheadedness of Inuyasha” while the slayer agreed with him.


And then there was Kagome, the bratty little human had her arms crossed, and a pissed off expression on her face as she mumbled something about him being an “insensitive Jerk” and oh look, who’s that looking down on him with a smug grin? Why it’s the wolf prince himself Koga. Yes it wasn’t just enough that Kagome constantly defied him as alpha male and pack leader, wasn’t enough that she constantly forced him to do acts of charity, helping other human’s who wouldn’t even piss on him if he was on fire, wasn’t enough that she had to try and force her will upon him again and again, to mold him into what she thought he should be, and it even wasn’t enough that she had to publicly embarrass him in front of everyone, other people, the wolves, and even his own brother. No she also had to side with other people against him. He wasn’t allowed to defend himself against others, wasn’t allowed to get angry as the wolf tossed insult after insult at him. No he wasn’t allowed to do that, he had to just sit there and take it. Because if he tried to do something about it. Boom, sit.

Slowly he pulled himself to his feet, bones aching in protest. Sure he healed fast enough; sure he could take one hell of a beating and keep going. But did she ever think of his well being? Nope, the pain and damage to his body with each sit? Nope, the feeling that his lungs would burst due to lack of air? Hell no.

“That was a good luck for you mutt-face, down in the dirt were dogs belong.” Koga quipped. Inuyasha couldn’t help but growl.

“Now Koga, that’s not nice.” Kagome said, all the while throwing Inuyasha a dirty look.

“One of these days Koga…..one of these days.” Inuyasha muttered under his breath, to softly for anyone else to hear. Tucking his hands into his sleeves Inuyasha made his way over to a tree, before easing himself down to sit against it. To think he had once seriously considered mating that girl, to think that he had been falling in love all over again. Only to have all those good feelings beat out of him time and time again. Inuyasha couldn’t quite pinpoint when his feelings for Kagome turned from loving to contempt.

Maybe it was after Koga kidnapped her, He of course had rushed off to her aid, plowing through the wolves, and he had even single handedly took out the disgusting birds Koga’s tribe had fought, with a single stroke of his Tessaiga. But when he had attempted to finish off the wolf, the same wolf that had kidnapped Kagome and put her in harms way. What did he get? “Sit boy.”

Or maybe it was the many, many sits he got for trying to discipline Shippo, his supposed adopted child. Inuyasha snorted, yeah he was supposed to be the runt’s father, but if he tried to teach the child something, Kagome interfered. Try to get the brat to show him the proper respect, Kagome interfered. Inuyasha chuckled darkly to himself. Yeah the kit was pitiful, couldn’t fight, could barely track, and couldn’t even hardly use his own Youki powers. Basically the kit was going to grow up weak, and probably die if someone wasn’t around to protect him. But honestly Inuyasha couldn’t bring himself to care anymore.

Lets not forget then monk and slayer, sure they seemed nice enough, but Inuyasha couldn’t recall a time where they had stuck up for him, defended him against Kagome, nope no one time. They weren’t as blatantly malicious as the girl from the future, but honestly, the whole Its-all-your-fault-Inuyasha attitude was starting to leave a bad taste in his mouth.

To top it all off, he was expected to protect them, make sure they had places to sleep, got the rest they needed, had food to eat. He was expected to track Naraku, to follow the scents, to take down the biggest foes.

Sure he was alpha, but he didn’t decide where they slept, when they rested, when they went out in search of the shards, when they returned back to the village, when they ate, or how much. Kagome did, and if he dare to open his mouth, dare to assert his dominance. Well all the girl had to do was open her mouth and say ONE FUCKING WORD. He couldn’t dare refuse the girl anything either, he had to eat what she put in front of him, had to remove his clothes to have his injuries tended to, despite the fact he never needed it, and if he refused? Tried to show some modesty? SIT! Boom. That always struck him as incredibly stupid, here she was trying to tend his wounds so what does she do? Slam him into the ground, what kind of fucked up shit was that?

Inuyasha fingered the beads around his neck. More and more lately he was beginning to feel like a dog on a leash, that’s all he was to them, a dog, a slave. Do this, do that, don’t do this, don’t do that. He couldn’t even eat as much food as he needed, he was bigger, he was stronger, his body simply needed more, but don’t dare ask because if he did he was a -pig- and if he gave into his demon nature and just took it? SIT! Boom. Then the one time he had gone out hunting to fill his needy belly, he had brought down a big buck, but could he eat in peace? Nope, Kagome had caught up with him, and when she saw him eating the deer, raw at that, she had sat him half-way to the center of the earth. That was another thing, they all said they didn’t mind him being a hanyo, didn’t mind his demon heritage. But if did something his demon side told him to do, he was punished. No he had to act like a human. It was his life, but he couldn’t do what he wanted.


His father would be ashamed of him, he was sure of it. He had to ignore his mighty demon blood time and time again, and to make matters worse something was happening inside of him, he could feel it. He didn’t know what it was but….it was happening. He wanted to ask Myoga, but the damn flea was never around when he needed him. Some retainer he turned out to be. Inuyasha couldn’t help but sigh, it wasn’t like he could ask Sesshomaru either. No that was just asking for verbal abuse…and maybe more.

Well one thing was for sure, Inuyasha was sick of this and one way or another.