InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Kindergarten Flirting ❯ The Storm, II ( Chapter 43 )

Kindergarten Flirting

Back in kindergarten, your mother would tell you that if a boy pulls your pigtails he likes you, and if he dips them in paint he loves you. That goes for the rest of your life too. Moreover, when you're an adult and work for the Hottest Man of the Year.

.xx.

Miroku pulled his hat down further when he heard Naraku instruct him to not reveal who he was to Sango, as of yet. Putting his hand on the small of Kikyo's back, he guided her to the bar where, immediately, he saw Sango leaning in close to Morimoto. If he wasn't on a mission, he'd punch the sleaze across the jaw and whisk Sango away. And then do things to her… fun things.

Bringing Kikyo to a barstool close enough to Morimoto, he leaned in close to her. "So," he drawled, "I didn't get your name."

Kikyo giggled. "It's Kikyo…"

He felt stiffening behind him; he knew that caught Morimoto's attention. Miroku leaned closer; "Well, that's a gorgeous name."

Kikyo batted her lashes. "I know…"

"Kikyo!" Sango hissed so that her earring could hear her. She heard shuffling and knew that her friends on the other end were making sense of the situation. And who was that man dressed in all white with her? Sango bit her lower lip.

"Sango," Kagome's voice buzzed to live in Sango's ear. "Listen carefully to what I'm saying and do. not. react."

Sango remained silent, but that was her signal to Kagome for her to keep talking. She saw Morimoto try to glance over his shoulder without seeming obvious, but it was rather obvious. Sango sipped her iced tea, her eyes locked onto Kikyo's disgustingly fake laugh.

"The man in white? He's our accomplice," Kagome quickly stated. "We told him to bring Kikyo by to the table. Pretend like you don't know him, but he will act like he knows you. Go along with it."

"Hmm…"

"Edge Kikyo on. Get her to reveal that she's preggo; if you gotta go for the low blow, then sink down to the floor."

Sango attempted not to snort. Inuyasha had burst into laughter upon hearing his girlfriend speak to her best friend. He couldn't help it; what she said sounded very comical to him, and he was a humorous person by nature.

"Push Morimoto's buttons. Get Kikyo to snap. Mention Chiisu."

"Hmm," Sango murmured once more and heard the line sizzle out. She saw the man in white straightened up slightly and, somehow, Sango knew that her friends were in contact with him now.

"'Roku," Kagome said urgently. "Sango knows you're one of us, but doesn't know who you are. Act buddy buddy with Kaoru, edge Kikyo on, and play along with Sango. If she acts like you need to be pissed at her, be pissed. If she wants you to act like you're the love of her life, act it as well. Sango's undercover name is Kitty."

"So, Kikyo," Miroku immediately began as Kagome's voice disappeared from his ear. "What can I get you?"

"Just a water." Kikyo smiled which caused Miroku to raise an eyebrow.

"Water? Why not some beer… or vodka… or vodka and beer?"

Kikyo shook her head. "No, just water please."

Because your slutty ass is pregnant! Miroku accused mentally. Winking at her, he turned around to, 'lo and behold, see Morimoto and Sango. His hat was tilted low, so his face was not as visible- that coupled with the low lighting, he was sure Sango wouldn't be able to recognize him. "Oh hey! Kitty, is that you?" Miroku strolled forward and gently hugged Sango who seemed confused.

"Sorry, you are?"

"Kiwi; gosh, honey, I'd think you'd remember me!"

.xx.

Inuyasha was howling in laughter and had lost the ability to breathe. "KI-FUCKING-WI? SERI-FUCKING-OUSLY?"

"Stop-fucking-swearing," Kagome snorted. "So what if Miroku lacks imagination? This is why he works for Human Resources and not with the graphics design team… or any other team that requires a very active and properly nurtured imagination."

"But Inuyasha has a point," Naraku snickered, "Kiwi?"

Inuyasha was still dying. "Kiwi. Oh man, KI-WI! He will NOT live this down! Kagome, make sure there's a bowl of kiwis on his desk tomorrow morning. HA! Kiwi… I love it…"

.xx.

Sango wanted to twitch till she wasn't sure if she was twitching or not. Kiwi? Who the hell is this guy… Plastering on the best realistic-fake smile she could muster up, she threw her arms around Kiwi again, also taking note of how familiar he felt and smelt.

"KIWI? The Kiwi?"

Kaoru snarled and shoved Miroku. "Who the fuck is named after a vegetable? And how the hell did you get into my party?"

"A kiwi is a fruit, smart one." Miroku muttered. "And I had an invitation, as did everybody else."

Morimoto's eyes narrowed. "I'd remember if I invited somebody named after a vegetable."

"Fruit." Sango and Miroku said simultaneously. Kikyo had gotten off of her bar stool and walked over to the three bantering buffoons. She had seen the man dressed in white talking to Kaoru and a very slutty looking character, so she took it unto herself to claim what was hers: Kaoru and the man dressed in white.

The girl in leather had nothing on her.

"Darling," Kikyo shrilled, appearing beside Miroku and wrapping her arms around his torso. Glancing over her shoulder, she smiled at Morimoto. "Love, have you met our guest here? He was kind enough to get me some water."

Morimoto snarled. "The guy named after a fucking vegetable?"

"Are you so ill educated that you cannot distinguish between that what is a fruit, and a vegetable?" Miroku stated, rather eloquently. Sango raised an eyebrow at him.

How does a guy who gives himself the undercover name of Kiwi be so good with words?

Sango's ear piece buzzed to life. "Ask him about your ex," she heard Kagome instruct. "Ask him if Inuyasha ran off with his secretary. Kiwi will play along."

As soon as Kagome's voice disappeared, Sango turned her attention to the man in white. "Kiwi," she tugged his sleeve, "have you heard the recent gossip of Inuyasha?'

Kikyo and Morimoto's attention were caught. Sango turned in her barstool so that she was leaning closer to Morimoto, hoping to keep him unguarded. Kikyo was seething red, seeing this little bitch so close to her man was irksome. To retaliate, she made herself comfortable on Morimoto's lap. Immediately, Sango shoved her.

"You fucking slut," Sango snarled, "was it bad enough that Inuyasha cheated on me with you?"

Kikyo spluttered. "ME? How the hell could he have cheated on me with you when we were engaged?"

"You tell ME!" Sango got to her feet and, to her glee, Kikyo got up as well. Maybe I can punch the lights out of her now. From the corner of her eye, she saw Kiwi ready to grab one of the ladies should they throw a punch, and Morimoto remained on his barstool, scowling like a dirty pig.

"You were the dirty little slut that he fucked and impregnated!"

There was a deadly silence that enveloped the four and, at that moment, Miroku stood up and managed to wedge himself between Sango and Kikyo. His one arm was resting on Sango's shoulder and the other was directly in front of Kikyo, should she move to attack. Morimoto, still, remained stunned and speechless.

"Cat got your tongue?" Sango sneered. "Come on, admit it, that good for nothing hanyou left you with a half-breed that's waiting to be born. And while he was fucking you, he was fucking me and that bitch he calls his secretary."

.xx.

"I am highly offended," Inuyasha muttered, "she makes it seem like I sleep around for a living." He glanced at Naraku and snarled before Naraku could even make a comment, "Shut up, Onigumo."

Naraku cackled. "She's a good actress. You said she modelled, Kagome?" He looked over his shoulder to see Kagome fiddling with a loose thread on her shirt. Breaking her attention away from her object of OCD, she looked up at Naraku.

"Yeah. She was a top drama student in high school as well. All around amazing person."

Naraku looked back at his computer screen. "She's good," he murmured. "Utsukushii, come in to the bar area; the situation is beginning to heat up."

There was a spur of static before a response came. "Yes, boss."

"Can we please go in?" Kagome tugged her boyfriend's ear. Inuyasha growled at her.

"Wench, Morimoto knows what we look like. Fuck, I wouldn't be surprised if he knew what we looked like naked. We're not risking our asses going in there, capiche?"

Kagome blinked. "… he's seen me naked?"

Naraku howled in laughter and Inuyasha twitched. "No, it's a figure of speech."

"Your figures of speech suck, Inuyasha." Kagome threw a facial tissue box at his head. "Stick to running a business, you're better at it anyway."

"Right," Narkau muttered, "when you're doing all the work for him."

"Shut up, Narkau!" Inuyasha spluttered, throwing the box Kagome just threw at him at Naraku.

This time, Kagome was the one dying of laughter.

.xx.

"Shut up," Kikyo shrieked, jumping off of Morimoto. Sango's eyes darkened, standing up even though Kiwi's hand was firmly on her shoulder

"Why? Truth hurts? Didn't fucking bug you when you barged into his office telling him you were pregnant with his brat? How tactful, huh, Ki-ky-ohhh." Sango broke down her name into distinct syllabus. "Too bad he doesn't wanna be with you."

"Well he didn't exactly want to be with you, either!" Kikyo made an attempt to jump at Sango but Miroku stopped her before she could. And, just like he had been for the past ten minutes, Morimoto sat in his stool. His jaw was tightening and he looked like he was about to say something, but nothing yet.

Kagome's voice came to life in Sango's ear. "Good. Now say something about how Kaoru would be a lot more faithful and wouldn't run out on a baby."

"Yeah? I bet if the baby daddy would be Kaoru," Sango fiercely pointed at Morimoto, "he would gladly take ownership of the child. But too bad you had a little boy father your baby. I'm glad that I got out of it before I fell victim."

"Kitty," Miroku finally spoke, "calm down."

"I will not, Kiwi!" Sango shrilled. "I said it once, that if I ever saw her, I'd bash her fucking face in. Here she is sitting on Koaru's fucking lap when a few weeks ago, she was fucking my then boyfriend."

"I have not slept with Inuyasha in over a year!" Kikyo shrilled.

.xx.

"Gotcha," Kagome grinned, leaning forward in her seat. Inuyasha passed her some peanuts he was munching on while watching the scene unfold. He had to admit, it was a lot more interesting than the soap operas that his mother and sister-in-law watched.

"She's good," Naraku nodded. "Really good. If she's ever out of the teaching business, there's a job lined up for her as a detective."

Kagome giggled. "Well, it was thanks to my idea."

"I have two jobs lined up," Naraku amended. "If you ever end up quitting the fatass's company that is."

"I'm not fat," Inuyasha, as soon as the words left his mouth, belched loudly. Naraku shook his head.

"I rest my case."

.xx.

"Really?" Sango's voice seemed painted with disbelief. "In a year? Then when did he make you pregnant? Dog demon pregnancies last six months, from what I know… and you're not even showing yet. That's hard to believe. Only demons that aren't related to any animals in particular have pregnancies that last a trimester."

Miroku played along. "Kitty has a point… how many months are you in? Three, four?"

"Five," Morimoto stated impatiently, "she's five months in."

"You're due soon then," Sango looked vicious. "And you aren't even showing that much yet. How is that possible? You should look like a woman who's in her final trimester of a regular human or non-animalistic demon pregnancy."

"That's because Inuyasha isn't the father," Morimoto growled. "I am. I ain't human, but I sure as hell am not an animal demon. And I do claim when a child is mine."

"Then why did she go to Inuyasha's office and declare that he was the father?" Sango roared. "I threw a vase at his head for that!"

Miroku bit back his laughter. Oh how he loved the woman beside him, even when she was being spastic. But, she literally had gained the evidence required to fuck Morimoto in court—good job, Sango!

"Because Inuyasha deserves to wallow," Morimoto hissed, "you should know what kind of asshole he is, cheating on you with his secretary and Kikyo. Wouldn't you say he deserves some kind of pain?"

"I agree he does," Sango nodded, "but this whole baby thing is a bit extreme. You could've spread bad news about his company and made his stocks crash… that would've been a hit below the belt for him."

Miroku twitched. If our stocks crash, I blame Sango for giving out the idea…

"What better pain is there for him to think that his firstborn child won't actually be his," Morimoto cackled, "what more pain is there for an asshole to believe that the one man he hates the most in the world is going to be daddy for the child he fathered."

Sango's blood was boiling. She wanted to kick Morimoto in his jewels so that he'd never sire children, other than fucking Chiisu. Dammit, the woman before her was carrying his son's child too. The family was more twisted than she could ever imagine. Ever.

"This is way twisted," Sango stood up abruptly. "Here I thought the asshole cheated on me and got you pregnant, but turns out that isn't the case. Perhaps I owe him an apology. Maybe."

Morimoto rolled his eyes. "Kitty, he's a bastard anyway. Why waste your breath on him?"

Sango's eyes narrowed. "I own up to the mistakes I make, Koaru. Kiwi," she turned to the man dressed in white, "wanna go out for a smoke?"

Kaoru's eyes widened. "But… weren't we gonna dance?"

"Right," Sango rolled her eyes, "after the fact I find out you're the father of the kid I thought my ex fathered? Not on your life."

"But…"

"Don't but me." Sango hissed. "There's fucked up, and then there's fucked up. You," she pointed at Kikyo and Kaoru, "are fucked up." She grabbed Miroku – Kiwi's—arm and dragged him out of the shindig. Kaoru and Kikyo gaped in their wake.

"Think they'd…"

"Nah," Kikyo shook her head, "she seemed like she hated Inuyasha way too much. Besides, would he believe her?"

Kaoru smirked. "I guess not."

.xx.

Sango and Kiwi ran out of the banquet hall and spotted the plumbing truck and the white Benz. Immediately spotting Inuyasha's striking silver hair, they ran to the Benz and crawled into the backseat. Before the door was even shut, Inuyasha pulled out and sped into the night horizon. It was then that Miroku took off his hat.

"MIROKU?" Sango screamed. "THAT. WAS. YOU?"

"That was Kiwi," Inuyasha snickered, "not Miroku."

"YOU DIDN'T TELL ME!"

"I wasn't allowed to!" Miroku whined. "I had to protect you!"

Kagome groaned in annoyance and stopped the argument before it could proceed further. "Can you kill him later? We have to figure out what else is gonna happen now that we have verbal proof that Inuyasha isn't the father."

"We didn't get him to admit that he killed Inuyasha's dad, though," Naraku muttered. Kagome rolled her eyes.

"Naraku, you're the best lawyer in all of Asia, I know you'll figure something out when we go to court about this."

Inuyasha nodded, making a swift left. "She has a point. You have everything saved?"

"Saved and already emailed to Ryuukotsusei." Naraku nodded. "We're gonna confront Morimoto first, before we decide if we're taking this to actual court or not." He looked over at Sango. "Excelling acting, my dear. If you ever quit being a teacher, come see me."

Sango grinned. "Thanks. It was fun," and then she shot Miroku a dirty look.

"I love you!" Miroku whined.

"Yeah, yeah. Can you drop us off to my apartment? I have to give him a good yelling." Sango asked Inuyasha who immediately took the turn necessary to drop them off. There was idle chit chat in the car, and eventually Inuyasha had dropped the three passengers off. Kagome went to the passenger seat when Naraku left and buckled in as Inuyasha sped back to his mansion.

"That wasn't as hard as I thought it'd be." Kagome commented. Inuyasha nodded.

"When you hit a guy below the belt, everything becomes easy. Men sing when their ego is in question."

Kagome laughed. "Trust me, I know."

"Shut up, wench." He winked at her. "By the way, I wasn't joking about the kiwis on Miroku's desk tomorrow."

Kagome snorted. "You're so lame. Oh, on Sunday a bunch of us are going to the manufactures to do an inspection on the new cribs. Debut is fast approaching."

"Right," Inuyasha nodded, "wear black on the day of the party."

Kagome snorted. "You need to get over this complex of telling me what to wear. You know what? Let's wear yellow."

"Black!"

"Yellow!"

"Black!"

"Yellow!"

"Bumblebee," Inuyasha winked at her and Kagome snorted.

"Lame." She retaliated. They pulled into his massive driveway and exited the car, Inuyasha handing his keys to the valet. Entering the house, they were greeted by the doorman and subsequently, Shippo. Rin, Sesshomaru and Izayoi said greeted them as well and the two were informed that dinner would be served shortly. Retiring to his bedroom, all Kagome wanted to do was cuddle and take a nap.

But there was one question that was nagging her… It had been nagging her since she found out that Morimoto had been the one that had killed Inuyasha's father.

"Inuyasha?" She murmured, looking up at him as they both lay in bed. Her hand was played out over his chest and he was propped up on a few pillows, watching T.V.

"Hmm?"

She sat up. "I… well… I don't… can I ask you a personal question?"

He looked at her. "What's up?"

Kagome inhaled deeply. "How… how exactly did Inutaisho die?"

.xx.

I realized I never actually explained how Inutaisho died, haha…