InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Kiyou Nitsuite Amedare: Ten, Tentou, ken Touhou ❯ Hachiban Bundan ( Chapter 8 )

[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]

A/n: Sorry it has been so long since I updated this story… but I seriously thought not many people enjoyed this… not too many reviews, so it kind of went to the back burner. But more than anything, this fic was for me, so I'll continue to update no matter what, even if it takes a long time. ^_^;. If anyone really, really likes this story and wishes me to hurry it along, review and tell me so. Otherwise, this will be done at leisure.

Hachiban Bundan

I'm sure you can easily imagine how terrified I was at the idea of my next turning of year. Indeed, I scampered around as a timid mouse might, awaiting the day the cat pounced upon it. The largest fear of all was that I did not know what awaited for me on the day I `escorted' Ken Yoromura. I hoped day after passing day that what occurred then did not resemble the training I had been given in any way, shape, or form. I shuddered to think about it, and if this was really what my life was to become.

I kept myself busy, which wasn't a terribly hard thing to come by… the months rolled by easily, one day as insignificant as the next… each holding only one idea. The idea that I'd become a day older, and the idea that that was one day closer to what I was afraid of. The fear consumed me, and it increased my bitterness…

Thoughts of running away came quickly to me those days. I was too scared to try though, because the repercussions of my actions then wouldn't be worth it.

I didn't even know what city I was in… where would I go? What would I do?

They'd find me.

I belonged to a gaijin. And they took that more seriously than if the okiya itself actually owned me. It was a superstition that gaijin had a worse temper than any normal man… why else would we call him the `white devil'?

I remember on one of those days, I was patching up a shoji door… Yura had come home drunk early that morning, and had tripped and ripped through the rice paper and broke some of the wood that held together the frame. So I was to care for it… I resented the fact I had to care for her mistake.

But again, I was reminded how the girls were what put food on the table. So I was to suffer in indignant silence as I did what I was told.

As I was working quietly, keeping to myself… as oft I did in those days… Shiori and Kaede had come up behind me to watch me. I wasn't quite aware of them-I was too deep in thought. But Shiori's voice came drifting to me like light that burst through the cloud that fogged my mind and brought me back to reality.

“What do you suppose Kikyou-chan is doing, hm, Kaede?” she spoke quietly, whispering as if that would keep me from noticing her… yet she spoke loud enough that I was sure she was trying to get my attention.

“I'm not sure… I suppose fixing whatever mess Yura has created yet again.”

I would like to point out something… while Kaede's voice did not have the low, seductive quality of Shiori's, hers did contain a tenderness and a kindness no other girls in the house possessed. I had always felt some sort of distant affection for her, though rarely did she take it upon herself to notice me. She didn't make as much money as the other girls, but somehow was more popular… she did not charge as much, but her attentions were often sought after. Yet she made enough for Obaa-san and Nigou-san never to complain…

“How quaint. It seems she is always fixing up other people's mistakes, isn't she?” Shiori stated simply. I had not bothered to look behind me, though she spoke as if I were not there. It was rude not to acknowledge them, but it would have been even ruder to appear as if I were eavesdropping, though it was absolutely impossible not to.

“Yes, well, I suppose that is just something admiral about our Kikyou-chan, isn't it? She's always doing things for us, and never complaining,” Kaede said simply. It seemed as if she were trying to redeem my unworthiness, the unworthiness Shiori was obviously hinting at through subtle means. Kaede would rather appear ignorant than put another person down.

It was then I felt my affection for her increase. She had such a kind heart, and a wise mind. She did not contain the devious nature the other three girls of the house possessed. And for that, I was grateful.

“Yes, yes I suppose it is,” Shiori commented dryly. “Yet it also seems to me that it is rather absurd to have her doing anything by wiping the floor beneath other's feet, wouldn't you agree? I mean, it seems to be all she's good at.”

At her words, my hands stilled at what they were doing. I winced… I knew not to speak back. This woman clothed me, and fed me, and gave me a roof over my head. I mustn't seem ungrateful…

Kaede replied, “No, I can't say I agree. In fact, I feel grateful to Kikyou-chan that she would be so generous as to put her time and effort into making sure we're comfortable.”

Shiori remained silent at this.

“Now, if you'll excuse me, Shiori-san, I must get ready for an appointment,” Kaede bowed to her, and I heard her footfalls against the wood in the hall, signaling her departure.

Shiori still stood behind me, and I felt my shoulders tense up… I tried to make my hands work, but they were shaking…

There were times in the house that the girls would try and get me in trouble… they found in amusing that I would get beat by Obaa-san.

Particularly Ayame and Yura found pleasure in this.

There was a rumor that Ayame was jealous of my eyes… that she wanted them for herself, wished she could have eyes the color of rain.

I didn't understand why she might want my eyes… they were what marked me as different… and as I came to know by then, inferior.

But still, she gave me every sort of reprimand for my difference that she could, taking out her envy on me.

And Yura loathed everybody.

Anyone who was prey was good enough for her, and it was quite easy to prey on me. I was a favorite, since Obaa-san hated me just as much.

Shiori… I never really knew her reasoning. For some reason, she just held some sort of dislike for me.

Perhaps because she found me weak…

“Listen to me, little Kikyou…” Shiori began. I dropped my hands, lowering my head in defeat. In was my sign to her that I was in fact listening.

“You are nothing. You were born as nothing, and will die as nothing. You will live in a jorou-ya as a common prostitute. As a whore. And I want you to know that you will sell your body to eat, and that you will be only dirt beneath my feet.”

She struck me in the back of my head, and I fell to the ground.

I did not bother to rise.

“Remember that. Remember that good and well, Kikyou, because I will be sure to visit you when you are to remind you of it.”

And she left me, lying on the ground. Long after she left, I still hadn't bothered to rise.

Even as I felt something foreign and wet trail down my cheeks, and cascade its way to the floor.

I just couldn't find the will in me to do so.

And that day, I came to understand something… after being so long in the dark. What my future truly held. Me using my body to survive… And what that meant for me.

Geisha… are not common prostitutes. Geisha were renowned. They were held in high esteem, and their company was well sought after. They were entertainers, and that was what they were known for. Dancers, singers, conversationalists. They were there to provide men distraction, and their beauty did it well.

I was not to be any of those things, or be talented in any of those ways.

I was to lie on my back and give a man pleasure in only one way.

And I think that was one day another part of me truly died in a way I could never recover.

What else was I to do?

I was trapped there, and there was no way to change it.

And it was then I decided, perhaps it was better to try and do something than live in a world I could never change once I reached that hellish place.