InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Love Is a Battle Field ❯ Chapter 1 ( Chapter 1 )

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Love Is A Battle Field

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We are young, heartache to heartache we stand

No promises, no demands

Love is a battlefield

Just thinking about her makes my skin flinch. I'm always thinking about her. Kikyou. Why do I lust for you so much? Why? You had betrayed me but then I found out that Naraku had tricked us both . . . but . . I still have hate for you but also lust. You push me away . . because you want to drag me with you down to hell. The others always tell me to go. Go and leave her alone. Leave you alone, forever. Never to see you again.

We are strong, no one can tell us we're wrong

Searchin' our hearts for so long, both of us knowing

Love is a battlefield

But I can't go. Why can't I go? You have me chained to you. My life is chained to you, my dear Kikyou. I am chained to your words. And I cannot break what I say to you. I cannot leave you. Even though you tell me to get away from you. To just stay away forever. But I cannot, dear Kikyou. Others think I'm being selfish but . . if they go in my body and mind-they would struggle. They would all struggle.

You're beggin' me to go, you're makin' me stay

Why do you hurt me so bad?

It would help me to know

It's night and everyone is asleep. I look up towards the night sky and think about her. Kagome. How come I had always thought you two look alike? You two are nothing alike. Kagome . . she is much more immature and seems like a child. She forgives so easily and doesn't see me for a useless Hanyou. How could I think you two are alike? Not to sound mean at all. Kikyou . . you wanted me to change into a human because you are pure and I am a Hanyou. I could not be with you. So, you would change me into a human because I am a Hanyou. But Kagome sees me as her friend?

Do I stand in your way, or am I the best thing you've had?

Believe me, believe me, I can't tell you why

But I'm trapped by your love, and I'm chained to your side

That's what I see from you two. Kikyou . . I love you so much. So much that I used to think it was nothing. Just nothing but an empty emotion. But things change Kikyou. I changed. You changed. Everyone has changed. I have found out that Naraku . . had lusted after you. When you were taking care of Onigumo . . he gave up his own soul and body for demons to eat him. And then become Naraku. Just for you. I would have done the same, for you Kikyou.

We are young, heartache to heartache we stand

No promises, no demands

Love is a battlefield

And I've found out so many things with you gone. You've left me for about 6 months. Almost a year. I'm getting along without you but I still lust for you. Almost every time I think about you. I sigh out loud. I've found out that . . I had fallen out of love with you. Yes, not loving you anymore. I figured that we could never be together. You are nothing but soil and clay-while I am living and well. And also-Sango and Miroku had feelings for each other. They are now awaiting their newborn baby.

We are strong, no one can tell us we're wrong

Searchin' our hearts for so long, both of us knowing

Love is a battlefield

I can't tell you how much I had regretted falling in love with you, my Kikyou. I do regret it. Because I had found out that Kagome . . had feelings for me. She told me and . . I had broken her heart.

Flashback

"An-Ano Inuyasha, matte." Kagome said looking down. "What is it now?" I ask.

She looks down just concentrating on something. I guess she is thinking hard.

"I've decided to make a decision . . I've been thinking really hard about it." She says. Silence. "I've decided to stay in my time . . for good." She says. "W-What?!" I ask. Why would she do that?! "But . . there is an exception for me to stay here with you." She says blushing. She looks up to me and she grabs my hands. What is she trying to say? "I-Inuyasha . . A-AiShiteiru." She says leaning up to me.

She presses her lips softly against mine and my eyes bulge. Oh no. Kagome . . . I'm so sorry. I softly push her away and she stares up at me with rejection in her eyes. K-Kagome I don't mean to reject you or make you cry. But I love Kikyou. I cough and clear my throat.

"K-Kagome . . I-I'm sorry. I don't love you . . I-I"-"I-I already know Inuyasha . . you love Kikyou. I guess I could never be a love in your heart, Kikyou took all of it. I understand Inuyasha . . first loves always come first." Kagome said rushing off. "K-KAGOME!" I yell.

Oh. Damn.

End of Flashback

I haven't seen Kagome for about . . . 6 months too. When Kikyou disappeared so did Kagome. Jeez, why did I have to break her heart?! I thought I loved Kikyou then but I didn't. And now I know that I love Kagome.

We're losing control

Will you turn me away or touch me deep inside?

And before this gets old, will it still feel the same?

I drop down from the Goshinboku and walk away. I go to the direction of the well and sit on the rim of it. I tried to get into the well about a week ago but Kagome sealed it off. She doesn't want to see me again. Just like Kikyou. I block out those thoughts and just stare down into the darkness of the well. It seems like it goes on forever but it doesn't. Just like my love for Kagome can go on forever but eventually I probably will fall out of love with her. Damn these emotions.

There's no way this will die

But if we get much closer, I could lose control

And if your heart surrenders, you'll need me to hold

I look away from the well and get up. Walking towards the trees I turn around one last time before rushing into the forest. I don't know where I'm going. Or who I will bump into-I don't give. I just close my eyes and get the pain out of my mind-that's all I care for. I stop and I kneel on the ground. I put my hands to keep me from falling flat onto the ground. Why am I feeling so low? Why?!

We are young, heartache to heartache we stand

No promises, no demands

Love is a battlefield

But I have to stay strong if I want to survive. Yes, stay strong. Maybe Kagome will come back someday. My life can go on forever. Unless I die I will live. And I shall not die until I see Kagome again. Kikyou? Who cares. I have decided Kagome is who I love-not Kikyou. Kikyou can go to hell by herself. I look up and a sweat trickled down my face and onto my clawed hand. Heh. I get up and I look up to the moon. Full moon. It burns bright because its using the suns light. Like I am becoming stronger because I am using Kagome. Her love is keeping me going. More like my love for her is keeping me going. Yes, my love for her.

We are strong, no one can tell us we're wrong

Searchin' our hearts for so long, both of us knowing

Love is a battlefield

Who ever said that nobody would get hurt in life? Love is the most. Who said love was safe? Wherever you look you'll see nothing is safe from your heart. So, why should you be so low and think about it? Be strong and live your life-don't throw it away. I rush to the well and look down. Here it goes. I jump into the well and hit the floor hard. It still won't let me in! Damn it all to hell! I will get in, I swear. I pound the ground and pound it will my fists. Just break off the seal. Please Kagome.

We are young, heartache to heartache we stand

No promises, no demands

Love is a battlefield

Suddenly the purple light comes and I smirk. Yes, it's working. I jump out of the well and open the doors. It's almost night. Perfect. I sniff the air and I pick up her scent. She's coming up the stairs of the shrine. But . . her scent has changed for some time. It doesn't matter! Just go see her Inuyasha! I nod to my human side mind and was about to rush over there when I stop. Dammit. She's with some man. His scent is stinking all over her. Huh? What is that in their arms? A-A pup? Sh-She already found a mate?! How long has she been gone? It seems more than 6 months now that I look at it. She's older and more beautiful that I see. Kagome. She's found another love.

We are strong, no one can tell us we're wrong

Searchin' our hearts for so long, both of us knowing

Love is a battlefield

But whoever said things would go great. Who said that everybody would get what they wanted? Nobody. So, I guess what Kaede said was right. You must fight for your love and if you don't watch out, you'll regret it because . . . . Love Is A Battle Field.