InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Love Remains ❯ Ch. 1: Bittersweet Memories ( Chapter 2 )

[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]

DISCLAIMER: Nope, don't own it. Nope, can't sue.

~*A/N: Konnichi wa, minna! Kibo, the violet-haired vixen here! Another chapter done! Yay! I know, I'm surprisingly chipper for the authoress of such a depressing and angsty fic, but I can't help it! I'm downright giddy... now I'm scared of myself... okay, I'll stop rambling now. On with the story!*~

Japanese Translations:
Oneesan: older sister
Obaasan: grandmother
Imoutosan: younger sister
Oya: parents

Chapter One: Bittersweet Memories

It had been months. Inu-Yasha had attended Kikyo's funeral a week and a half after Miroku's disturbing phone call. He had switched shifts with a co-worker to attend, and Miroku had driven him, supported him, and let him cry on his shoulder. Somehow, Inu-Yasha had survived the heart-breaking evening, surrounded by old friends he hadn't seen in years, all sharing the same grief. She had been cremated, so the altar had held a large framed picture of her, smiling. The service was short and simple, just the way she would've wanted it. He remembered seeing her imoutosan, Kaede, surrounded by her friends. The teenager he saw looked so different than the little girl he remembered following her oneesan around.

That had been in mid-November. Now, in late January, he was finally sleeping again, finally eating again, and could actually smile. Well, it was more of a smirk, and wasn't completely genuine, but it was progress. Memories of her still haunted him at every turn. Just when he managed to not think of her, someone would say something or do something to remind him of her. He couldn't listen to the radio anymore; it seemed the dj's were out to get him. He lay in bed, having just read a book. It had been about two soulmates, destined to be together. They each recalled past lives, and their deaths. When they met in the present and were face to face, everything came back. One had always died, and the other had followed the one, so that they could be reincarnated together and possibly meet again. The ending made him think of Kikyo, and he burst into tears. Would it be too late for him to follow her?

Not that he hadn't considered it before. Many times. But everytime, he would shy away, just like Hamlet had said in Shakespeare's words, "But that dread of something after death, The undiscover'd country from whose bourn No traveller returns, puzzles the will, And makes us rather bear those ills we have Than fly to others that we know not of?" At Kikyo's funeral, he also had seen what it does to those left behind. He couldn't do that to them, to the people he cared about, no matter how much he loved and missed Kikyo.

The streetlight outside his window bathed his room in orange light. Inu-Yasha watched the ceiling fan spin around lazily, casting shadows over the room. His mind went back to the night he had first met her. It was mid-July. He had turned 15 at the end of May. He and his then-best friend, Naraku, had walked into the downtown area of the small city they lived in. They came to a fast food restaurant, and bought sodas. They walked out to find Kagura, one of Inu-Yasha's close friends, in the parking lot with a group of girl and boys. Some he recognized from school, some he didn't. He and Naraku joined the group, and walked down the "main drag".

Kikyo had approached him, confident and cocky. He had fallen in love with her at first site. She was beautiful, physically and emotionally. They talked as they walked, lost to the rest of the group. They stopped at a laundromat, smoking and sipping sodas. A white pick-up truck pulled into the parking lot, and a boy he vaguely recognized got out. They all ended up piling into the flatbed of the truck, and driving to a park. A few people jumped into the lake, swimming in thier clothes. Inu-Yasha, Naraku, and Kikyo just stood and watched, laughing. Naraku had glanced at his watch, and told Inu-Yasha they had to go. Everyone had piled back into the truck and dropped the two off at home. Inu-Yasha had gone home smiling that night.

The next night, sitting at home, his phone rang. It had been Kikyo. She denied that Kagura had given her his number, and refused to tell him how she had gotten it. For weeks they talked nightly, for hours on end, until Inu-Yasha's okaasan got on the phone and told him to go to bed. He learned much of the girl in that time. Her birthday was only two days after his, she had grown up in the town just as he had, she was living with her obaasan, her okaasan and imoutosan lived in a town 30 miles away. She had lived with them for two years, attending middle school in another district, but missing her friends, wishing to return to their school district. So her obaasan agreed to let her live there, in her basement.

One late night, they talked about marriage. They promised each other that "someday" they would marry each other. After about a month of talks like this, they had started seriously dating. That had lasted only a week, but they had stayed good friends. They were there for each other, even when Kikyo's okaasan had told her the most disturbing news of her life. The man she believed to be her otousan, who had raised her since she could remember, wasn't her biological otousan. He had divorced from her okaasan a few years ago, and moved 4 hours away. She still visited him regularly. Apparently her okaasan had been married before this, but had left him shortly after Kikyo's birth. When she remarried, she changed Kikyo's middle and last names to hide her from her violent otousan. Inu-Yasha was confused when she legally changed her name back after receiving this information. Her explanation had been, "It's who I really am. I can't deny that."

That brought back the night she had first cried in front of him. They were watching Rain Man, cuddled together on her couch. She suddenly went stiff in his arms, and rolled over to bury her face in his chest. He remembered her being embarrassed, and him telling her not to be. She explained that the movie was reminding her of her family, of how she wished they were closer. He hugged her closer, comforting her. She had looked up at him, smiling through her tears, and kissed him. They had then vacated the couch, opting for her bed. That night they made sweet love, him letting her know that she wasn't alone.

Later that night, she had begged him to stay, to hold her while she slept. He would've, but it was late, and his oya would've flipped had he not come home. Especially if they found out that he had spent the night at her apartment and not bothered to call and let them know. If he had called, they would have been ok with it, but it was two in the morning, and he hadn't wanted to wake them. So he left, her pleas tearing at his heart the whole time.

'That was the last time we made love,' he thought, sorrowfully. 'How I wish it hadn't been. If I could've just swallowed my damn pride, let her know how much I loved her, maybe she'd be here with me today. I wouldn't feel this aching inside, this emptiness.'

Since they met, Kikyo had drifted in and out of his life. She moved around a lot, and had gone to live with her "otousan"- the man who had raised her - to finish high school. After that, she kept drifting around, the tide occasionally carrying her back into town. Wherever she was, she never hesitated to call him to say "Happy birthday," when that time of year rolled around. Knowing that he wouldn't receive that call this May tore at his already fragile heart. They would have tuned 21 together, and had always said they would party together. He eventually cried himself softly to sleep.

~*A/N: Sorry for another depressing chappy, but it's necessary to set up the history between them. I promise it will get happy! And he will meet Kagome! So keep reading! Ja ne, minna!*~