InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Lucky Charms ❯ Lucky Charms ( Chapter 1 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

Title: Lucky Charms
Author: Alexandrine of Ravynstone Abbey (The Annex)
Fandom: InuYasha
Genre: Humor, Parody, Crack!Fic
Rating: T for potty humor, language, Inu's mouth.
Characters: Jaken and the cast of InuYasha, living and dead.
Notes: For inuhanyounikkie, from a comment thread from a while back. Jaken is chased for his um charms by the cast. Abuse of little green men as well as parodying the Lucky Charms commercials. Also written for St. Patrick's Day. Rife with fandom clichés. And also featuring a stripping Jaken. No really he strips. I had such trouble ending this and had a bolt out of the blue.
Words: 491



Jaken's harsh breathing punctuated the air as he scrambled up the steep, rocky hill, sending stones tumbling after him. He spotted a large rock outcropping and sped up as fast as his short legs would go to reach the safety of the rock. Clambering up, he sent a shower of pebbles rolling down the hill, causing his pursuers to curse and dodge the missiles. He turned to face the gathering crowd with the old man head at the ready, then yelled down, "Why are you chasing me? I have done nothing to you!"

"I'm chasing you for your lucky charms, Jaken. I don't know why all these others are following me." InuYasha looked back over the crowd of humans and demons, some of them mere ghosts.

"I don't have any lucky charms you foolish half-breed. Why, Lord Sesshoumaru will punish you for your impertinence, boy!"

"Hate to be the bearer of bad news, but Sesshoumaru was one of your chasers." InuYasha flashed a fangy smirk.

"I beg to differ, little brother, but I was chasing you for chasing my most loyal servant." Sesshoumaru glided up, leading Ah-Un with Rin and Kohaku on its back.

"I wasn't the only one chasing him, everybody here was chasing him!" protested a irate hanyou, waving his hands in the air."

"So the mutt is in trouble with his big brother. Priceless." Kouga interjected, walking up to the group bunched under the outcropping.

"Shut up, ya mangy wolf!" InuYasha snapped, folding his arms.

Jaken glared at the impertinent half-breed. "I'll show YOU lucky charms, you insolent brat!" He fiddled with the ties to his hakama which promptly dropped to the ground. Jaken kicked free of the puddle of fabric and watched it as it flew through the air to land on Miroku's head. His hands moved to the fastenings on his haori, then tossed the offending garment, this time landing on Rin. Standing in his loincloth on the rocky outcropping, he cut an impressive figure, or so he thought. With one tug, he was free in the breeze. Jaken tossed the white cloth, this time aiming for InuYasha, who quickly dodged, leaving the cloth to flutter to the ground. "Here's some lucky charms for you!" Jaken yelled, doing a pelvis thrust and then shaking his scrawny hips.

Pandemonium erupted as the crowd almost as one recoiled in horror then attempted to exit the area as quickly as possible, most trying to claw their eyes out to rid themselves of the sight of Jaken hanging free in the breeze. Almost as soon as it began, it was over, leaving a now shivering Jaken gingerly making his way down the rocks in search of his clothing, the ever stoic Sesshoumaru, and a traumatized Inu-tachi.

"Kagome, in those commercials, did they every catch the little green man?" Inuyasha spoke, hands covering his eyes.

"I don't think they ever did."

"I think I know why they never did catch him."