InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Male Migraines ❯ Llama Drama ( Chapter 10 )

[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]

Birthday's now passed and it feels good to be eighteen! Actually, that's a lie. I feel no different now than when I was seventeen. And I only collected $22, twenty of it coming from my mom! But it was nice having people even stick their heads out of their cars to yell happy birthday to me! Anyways, this is irrelevant. Read it, like it, love it!

"Look honey, isn't it magnificent?" Izayoi said in a breathless whisper. Inutaisho joined her at her side and scoffed. You mean to tell me you drove me all the way out here to see this? We flew on a cramped ass plane for seventy-two hours, I was detained in customs because they figured that my average-sized deoderant was too big and could have been a bomb, I was humiliated when my electric razor was some how turned on and they said it was a dildo, we then drove for another eight hours on roads in the middle of nowhere (and I swear I saw Wile E. Coyote chasing Roadrunner), the car broke down on the way so we had to catch a ride with a bunch of hippies singing Vietnam songs like "Sweet Home Alabama" with the inside of the van being so vibrant I couldn't sleep, when we finally did get here, I couldn't ride a horse like you, nooo, they just happened to be out, but they had a llama in store. A fucking llama! What the fuck is a llama?! The damn thing was more cantankerous than an old woman and spat at me!!! So of course you know I don't play like that so I spat at the thing back! And do you know that damn llama hawked a loogey on me!!!"

Lord Inutaisho was now huffing in his rant. But he continued. "And as if that wasn't bad enough, the stupid beast was walking too close to the edge of the trail! This thing winds up for hundreds of feet meaning one wrong step and that's your life. Literally, that's your life, not mine. But still! So for another hour, I have to endure this nasty, rude-ass creature in the blazing sun all to reach the sumit and look down upon this! The Grand Canyon is nothing more than a huge fucking ditch! If I wanted to see that, I could've used Dragon Twister with Sounga and stayed at home!"

A/N: I never really explain Sounga in my stories since I figure that people have already seen the third movie, but it's just a very demonic sword that Inutaisho had possesed. Dragon Twister was its main move and when used, could cut out huge chunks of land. Just figured I'd clarify!

Izayoi stared at him with a hurt expression. "But I thought you wanted to come here." "You said that we were going to Vegas. I don't remember anything about coming to see the Grand Canyon." "So I took a little detour, big deal. Did it kill you to see a little nature?" "Just about!" Inutaisho huffed in an Inuyasha-like way. He glanced over his shoulder to look behind him and locked eyes with his llama. It spat again in his face. "That's it! I'm about to find out what a llama steak tastes like!" He lunged for the animal, but the tour guide stopped him.

"Don't! Llama's are an endangered species!" Inutaisho paused and slowly turned to him. "What?! Llama's?! Like anyone would ever want to to hunt them! I mean, what the fuck does a llama have to offer? Spit?" "They're very valuable for their hair. In Europe, they're becoming very known as a car interior." Inutaisho held up a hand and shook his head in disbelief. "Wait a minute. I've heard of people having chinchilla, but llama? Who the fuck would want to sit on llama?" "Evidently Europeans," the guide said. "Now that's just sick," Inutaisho said, walking away before he made good on his threat to the llama.

"Come on, Izayoi. We're leaving." Slot machines and strippers danced before his eyes. He didn't hear any footsteps behind him. Izayoi wasn't following. "We just got here!" She cried. "God, Izayoi. What the fuck is so interesting about this? Perhaps it's because you humans never get the satisfaction of feeling bigger than life and this stupid ditch gives you that sensation. Well, kudos to you!" She glared at him. "I thought we were going to spend some time together. Now I see that this whole vacation was all about you! It's always about what the fuck Inutaisho wants, just forget about his wife and mate of six hundred years!"

Inutaisho rolled his eyes. "Please don't start that now, Izayoi. Besides, you wanted to go to Vegas as much as I did. Like you don't want to watch the chippendale dancers." She looked at him with a shocked expression. "Why would I want to look at them? I have you." Here Inutaisho gave her a look that read clearly: bullshit. "Uh-huh. But you nearly all but kiss the TV screen when that commerical with that guy stripping with those other dancers comes on. You even made up a name for him...what was it? Mark? Steve? Either way, you can't deny you don't want that." "Well, I..." Izayoi stuttered. "Do I strip for you?" "Do I for you?" Izayoi countered him. "No, which is just why we need to go. The sooner we get there, the sooner we'll both get what we want. We're not cheating on each other, so what's there to be ashamed about?"

Izayoi seemed reassured by this. She handed the reins of her horse to the guide, waiting for Inutaisho to do the same. He looked over to where the llama was looking for some grass to chew on. "Look at it. Just abiding its time before another attack. Well take this!" He ran over to it and shoved it over the edge. It's bleated cry followed by an awkward thud resounded off the canyon walls. Grabbing Izayoi, Inutaisho warped into a sphere of light akin to Sesshomaru's and disappeared before anyone could stop them, heading off to sin city.


Been a moment, but hey it's out! Perhaps not as funny as what I'm used to writng, but people wanted to know about Inutaisho and Izayoi and here they are, getting spat on by llama's and killing them in the same day! But I'm really an animal lover and would never condone in such an act of violence! Anyways, please review and tell me what you thought of the chapter!