InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Maybe... ❯ One-Shot

Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha… I share…^_^

~*~ MAYBE~*~

There I was…waiting for a chance

Hoping that you'd understand the things I want to say….

It hurts…a lot. Not that I didn't expect it to be that way, but still…it makes me want to wish that things were different. This was something that I never hoped for, wished for or imagined would happen when I fell in love. But looking at my hanyou, I know that I would never have it any differently.

As my love went stronger than before

I want to see you more and more

But you closed your door…

I went home, pretending to be mad at you, just so I could help making you feel better. If I had known what would await me when I came back, I never would have gone…

There you were, under the Goshinboku, with the last person that I would ever want you to be.

Kikyou…

You were playing out a scene that I knew would break my heart to bits and tiny pieces as soon as I saw it…or heard your words. You were vowing to protect her from Naraku, from everyone. You said that you loved her and you think about her with each day that passes. You told her that her life was yours, just as your life is hers. And with each promise, each utterance, I feel myself retreating to an empty shell.

He has chosen…

Oh, I never saw another god-awful kiss, just like I did before. It was just you embracing her with a passion while declaring your undying love for her, and her resisting you at first and then slowly softening under your touch…how I wished that that could have been me. But that wasn't even when I knew that you have chosen her over me…

It was when it was all over, and I revealed myself. You knew that I saw it and heard everything that you said. And still, you didn't look away… You always did after meeting with her, just so that I couldn't see the guilt written all over your face. But now, you looked at me straight in the eye with an expression of total melancholy on your face. And then you said my name. I could only look back, heartbroken, and then I ran…

Why can't you try to open up your heart?

I won't take so much of your time…

I went home, pretending to be happy and pretending to be the same old me. But inside, I was dejected by the thought of finally losing you…over to someone I could never defeat. She had your heart first, and now she has your promises…even after she's dead. I despair as I think of how cruel Fate can be. She's dead, but she still has you. I'm here, alive, and you don't want me… I know that I have no right to reason with your heart and I'm probably being ridiculous by thinking that you care about me. It's just that ever since I met you, you have become a constant in my life. Something that now, I could never imagine living without.

It was then that I was hit by the realization of how very much I love you… the way your arrogant grin spreads upon your face, how you make those outrageous remarks of yours, your so-familiar smirk and the ever-present "Keh!"-if you could call it a word-are just a few of the things that I came to love about you. And I do know, in my heart, that you care for me too in your own twisted kind of way. The concern you have for me when you know I'm sick or I'm in trouble, the jealous bouts and the endless arguments we had because of Kouga-kun, the panic in your voice when you think that I'm going to die and there's nothing you can do to stop it…but I know better. You will always be there to save the day, and me, `coz you're my own personal hero-my Superman.

Maybe it's wrong to say please love me too, `coz I know you'll never do…

Somebody else is waiting there inside for you…

I know that there's no competition between her and me…you have chosen already. And I guess I can never really change your mind. You told me once that own so few in this life: one of those is your honor and integrity. And as long as you draw breath, you will always, and I mean always, see to it that your word is your bond. As you've given her your vows…She will hold you to it.

Maybe it's wrong to love you more each day `coz I know she's there to stay

But I know to whom you should belong…

I never even thought it possible for love you feel as great as this-and still continue to grow even though it pains me so much. Not even the certainty that I can never have you and you can't love me back could dissuade me from loving you. Nor diminish the spark that's in my heart…beating just for you. I love you with a soul-rending, gut-wrenching, heart-stopping clarity-body, heart, and soul-- as humanly possible. I long to be the one in your arms--those strong limbs of yours holding me tight as though to never let go; your hands entwined with mine; your beautiful lips against mine with a searing passion, those eyes of yours-those amber orbs looking at me with so much love as our bodies merge into that age old rhythm of love. I long for all of those…and more. How I dream of running my hands through your silver mane, to touch your cute fuzzy ears and have you moan in pleasure, to stroke and caress you all over…to have you completely-as though to absorb you into my own essence-a part of me forever. I want you with a ferocity and fervor that it scares me so…

I believed what you said to me

We should set each other free,

That's how you want it to be…

The moment your eyes met mine and I saw that "something" flash in your gaze, I knew with a sinking finality that my time with you was over… You did not need me anymore, not even as a shard detector. I tried to return the Shikon shards to you, but I was afraid… because it will be the last time I'm ever going to see you and after that, we can never be together again…

But my love went stronger than before

I want to see you more and more

But you closed your doors…

Why can't you try to open up your heart?

I won't take so much of your time…

Finally, I gathered up my courage to face you and to tell you that I want to be with you…for always. I realized that you were going to tell me goodbye. I saw it in your eyes and the way you spoke to me. But I could not, would not, allow it! I need you-in my life, beside me, anyway that I can have you. Though you're not mine completely, I want to show you the love I feel for you. I would simply wither up and die if I'm not near you…

Maybe it's wrong to say please love me too,

`Coz I know you'll never do

Somebody else is waiting there inside for you…

I know it's wrong to love you more each day

`Coz I know she's there to stay…

I tried to forget you, but I couldn't. For the short time we've been apart, I missed you terribly-it felt like I was tearing up inside and no one could heal me but you. So I came to the unshakeable decision that I would accept everything-your choices, your feelings, your past, and your would-be future without me-with no questions asked. All I want in return is the chance to prove my love for you, and to stay beside you for as long as you want me to-for as long as you need me to.

People would probably say that I'm crazy, foolish, stupid-all the things that I've called myself over and over again for falling in love with you-but I don't care anymore. I just know that that I'm happy whenever I'm with you and feel like I'm losing my mind with each moment spent apart from you. I'm contented with being yours for at least a time before you return to her… I don't really know what I'll be able to give you, do for you or be to you, but I can assure you that I would never ever leave you, that I would trust and believe in you, and that I would love you for the person you are completely…for all time…

But my love is strong; I don't know if this is wrong

But I know to whom you should belong…

~02262004~

~*~ I noticed that there's a lot of fanfics out there relating Inuyasha's POV, and rarely of Kagome's, so I decided to try and make one. ^_^ This is actually a song fic, the song is entitled "Maybe" by the Neocolours, a Filipino band. It's actually one of my fave songs and I think it captures Kagome's emotions perfectly. This is my first fanfic and it's kinda long, so I hope that you'll bear with me and that you liked it at least. I'm thinking of writing another one, this one with Inuyasha's POV in it. And I probably will when I have the time away from work to think on it. If you guys have the time then please, please review! Thanx and happy reading! ~*~