InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ MST: Love Witch ❯ Prologue

(We don't own Inuyasha. We wish we did, though. Sera found one VERY nice picture of Sesshoumaru without his shirt... *Both drool puddles on the floor*)

Crimson eyes glinted as the demon leaned closer over the keyboard. This... Internet? Yes, that was the word. This Internet was a very fascinating thing. He grinned as the clicked the Rodent. The "transmitter" was perfect for his plans. And Kagura and Kanna should be back soon, leading the victims. This was going to be very interesting. Besides, there were some interesting things on this "e-bay" place. (A/N: Naraku at ebay... scary thought...)

Naraku smirked as he set up the spell to transport his soon to be victims to the satellite. He was gonna have some fun with Inuyasha and his group. Finding that well and what it could do was one of the best things that ever happened to him. And discovering the Internet hadn't hurt, either.

The tendrils of magic and energy finished slipping from his fingers, and settled into place. Everything was set except for the transmitter to talk to them. Food was well stocked on the most advanced satellite in existence (it had only taken a LITTLE persuasion to get the country leaders to give it to him. He had only had to destroy a few small countries.)

He blinked as a "truck" arrived. A box thumped in front of the door, and the truck screeched off. "That was fast." He opened the door, grabbed the box, and dragged it inside. "How do humans CARRY these things? It weighs a couple tons, at LEAST!!" (Sorry Naraku, it's just the law of Things in Boxes. They're always heavier than you can comfortably carry. No matter how strong you are.)

Naraku sighed in relief as he finally got it in what he had dubbed "The Control Room". This house really was nice for his purposes. And killing off that weak, rich human hadn't taken a lot of energy.

Once the box was open, the battle between Male and Appliance continued. This is familiar to most human females that have a husband or father too stubborn to call an electrician or plumber.

Bangs, clangs, and other loud noises were punctuated with loud curses, and the occasional sizzle of magic.

Finally, Naraku did something that no male had ever done... he looked at the directions. Of course, everyone already knows that he's not right in the head.

Ten minutes later, a completed transmitter stood against one wall of the room. Naraku stood to the side, panting, bruised, and covered in grease. A quick clean-up spell took care of it.

A few crashes alerted the powerful demon to the fact that his creations had returned. Hopefully, they had managed to lure Inuyasha and his group back.

Naraku smirked as Kagura and Kanna dashed in, his victims hot on their heels. They had gone one better. That annoying demon lord Sesshoumaru and his cronies were with them, as well as the required people to torture.

Kagura and Kanna ran right through the spell, and it left them alone.

Inuyasha was next, carrying that annoying miko wench and kitsune kit. Right behind him was that fire-cat, degrading herself by carrying two humans. And Sesshoumaru was behind her, carrying that little human girl and seriously annoying toad.

The spell took hold, and all nine froze in place. The demons struggled hard to free themselves, even after the humans had given it up. Finally, after a weird humming, they disappeared.

A collective yell came from everyone's mouth but Sesshoumaru's when they appeared a couple feet above a metal floor in a strange place. Again, everyone but Sesshoumaru landed painfully with a large WHUMP!

Kagome was one of the first to peel herself off of the ground. "Whe... where are we?" They were in a largely circular room, with nearly half of the wall taken up by control boards, above which were windows. Outside she could see the darkness and small pinpoints of light that made up space.

About a quarter of the wall of the other half of the room was made up of a giant screen. The rest of the wall had a few passage-ways leading to parts of the place other than this.

By this time, the rest of the group were slowly picking themselves up, and Sesshoumaru had put his passengers down. The screen flickered to life, making every person in the room except Kagome back away and wonder what strange, evil magic this was. A larger version of Naraku's face and shoulders appeared, bringing a growl from most of the throats present.

"What the hell did you do to us? Where are we!?" Inuyasha demanded, blunt as always.

A smirk greeted them. "You are on what I believe is called a 'Satellite'. After coming to this time, I acquired it and set up a very special torture for all of you that I believe only a few of the most evil villains have done. Consider it payback for all the times you've brought me grief."

Kagome was starting to have a very bad feeling about this. She had read her share of fanfics before. "Don't tell me you're gonna make us MST bad stories written about ourselves for your own sick, twisted amusement."

"Damn. You guessed." Kagome groaned and sank to the floor, her face buried in her hands.

"I can't believe that even YOU are evil enough to put us through that."

"I do not see what is so bad, Kagome-sama. It can't be as horrible as you make it out to be." Miroku said objectively.

"You wouldn't believe how bad some people can write."

Naraku's eyes glittered. "I believe that three of the group will not be very suitable for my torture sessions, so they shall assume other jobs on the satellite. Kirara..." A giant book thicker than the now small-size fire-cat appeared in front of her. "You shall be the pilot of the ship. Read the manual to figure it out." A giant sweatdrop appeared on the fire-cat.

"As for the little girl, I'm not mean enough to make her read the fics..." Rin muttered something about not being able to read at all, "So she shall be the cook." Sesshoumaru and Jaken blanched.

"Kami-sama help us all..." Sesshoumaru said, a fearful look on his face.

"We're all gonna die." Jaken put it much more bluntly.

"And, last of all, toad-boy, you're clean-up duty. Just cause I don't like you." A bucket and mop appeared in front of the stunned toad-youkai.

"The rest of you, find rooms and make yourselves comfortable. I'll send you your first assignment in an hour or so." The image disappeared.

"..." Was the response of everyone in the room.

"Kagome-sama, I have a question. Exactly what is this 'MSTing' that Naraku talked about?" Miroku asked, not really sure if he wanted to know the answer.

Kagome sighed, and proceeded to explain all about their new torture (I'll assume the readers already know what MSTing is, so I'll skip that).

"Tha... that's horrible!" Inuyasha spluttered.

"The most cruel torture I've ever heard of!" Sango added.

"How low can a youkai get?" Shippou put in his two cents.

Kagome sighed. "And we're stuck with it. Come on, guys. Let's go pick out our rooms."

The disgruntled group separated, a few people going down each hallway.

***

By the time everything had been sorted out, the room arrangements were thus: Inuyasha had his own room, Shippou roomed with Kagome, Sango roomed with Kirara, Miroku had his own room, Sesshoumaru roomed with Rin, and Jaken had his own room (come on, would YOU want to share a room with him? I thought so). They had also explored the rest of the satellite, and found out that it contained a kitchen (*shudders at the thought of Rin's cooking*), a living room, an entertainment area, with a tv, games, etc., the theater, and, surprisingly, a large garden. The demon members of the group breathed a sigh of relief at this. At least this place didn't smell of cold and metal. At least, not as much. There were even a few trees. Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru promptly fought over who would get the biggest tree, which was large enough for a demon to relax in comfortably. The fight ended with a few well placed "SIT"s, and it was declared a draw.

Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru were about to have a verbal battle, when a wailing siren went off. Everyone covered their ears, and Sesshoumaru and Inuyasha let loose with doggy howls. Shippou added in some yips, Kirara meowed loudly, and Jaken just complained with the humans.

"What IS that????" Sango yelled above the noise.

"Just follow me!" Kagome shouted back and led the way back to the control room. Naraku was back on the control screen, and once they entered the room, the siren stopped, much to the relief of everyone's ears.

"I have picked your first story to MST. It is called Love Witch, by Gloria Stone. Oh, and the kitsune brat sits this one out." Naraku sure didn't want to wait to begin to torture them, did he?

"Why do I have to stay?" Shippou complained.

"It's a lemon." Kagome, being the only one in the room who knew what "lemon" meant, blanched.

"What does fruit have to do with me staying here?" Shippou demanded.

"Trust me, Shippou. You better stay." The warning look that his adoptive mother sent to the little kit made him, reluctantly, agree.

"Fine. I'll just try to figure out what that 'Play Stay-shun' thing does." The kit, deep down relieved that his torture was postponed, left.

"Kagome, just what is a lemon?" Inuyasha asked as the rest of the MSTers made their way to the torture room... uh... I mean, theater.

The group didn't understand why Kagome suddenly turned a bright shade of red and started coughing. "Uh... I'll just let you find out on your own."

They entered, grabbed some seats near the middle of the small theater, and sat down in this order: Inuyasha, Kagome, Sango, Miroku, and Sesshoumaru. There were a couple of seats between the monk and the demon lord, though. And another seat between the monk and the demon exterminator, for obvious reasons.

Naraku's voice boomed out from an intercom. "Oh, by the way. Just to let you know, this IS a Kagome / Inuyasha lemon."

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!" was Kagome's sentiment as the fic started.

(The characters will talk in script format. It's easier to MST that way)

Kagome sat back on her butt, a furious and dangerous look set in her eyes.

Inuyasha: What else is new? *Gets sat by a still fuming Kagome*

"This is all your Fault Inuyasha!"

Everyone but Inuyasha: As usual.

Inuyasha: *From his place on the floor* HEY!!!!

The demon dog

Sesshoumaru: HALF dog demon. He doesn't deserve the title of a full youkai.

Inuyasha: *Has to be sat a few more times to prevent him from tearing his brother apart*

stopped trying to break out of their prison

Miroku: Who has them imprisoned this time?

Inuyasha and Kagome: WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY "THIS TIME"????

Miroku: Uh... never mind...

long enough to look at her surprised.

"My fault? How in the hell do you figure that?"

Kagome: Cause it usually is.

Inuyasha: Why is everyone picking on me today?

Kagome was intimidated one bit by his badass demon routine.

Everyone but Kagome: She was??

Kagome: I think that was a typo.

Sango: What's a typo?

Kagome: When the author makes a mistake in the document. Trust me, we'll probably see a lot of them.

Jerked her head to the side sharply, he nose high in the air.

Sesshoumaru: Let me guess. More typos?

Kagome: Yep.

"If you hadn't run in here like a one man army.

All 'cept Inuyasha: Yep. That's Inuyasha.

Inuyasha: *Pouts, until he's promised a lot of ramen by Kagome*

Then that Evil Witch wouldn't have captured us!"

"Well she had a jewel shard!"

Sango: What's with the evil witches wanting shards anyways? They're not even youkai, they can't really get more powerful by using one.

Sesshoumaru: It's an evil creature thing.

Others: Oh.

Kagome frowned at him her brown eyes flashing.

Inuyasha: *Puzzled* But Kagome's eyes are blue-gray.

Miroku: So you've actually looked?

Inuyasha: Uh... but... what I mean is... OH JUST SHUT UP!!!!!

"You don't just go running into danger without knowing what your up against.

Sango, Miroku, and Kagome: Inuyasha does.

Inuyasha: WHY THE HELL ARE YOU PICKING ON ME TODAY???

I swear Inuyasha I sometimes wonder how you've survived living this long!"

Sesshoumaru: I wonder, too. After all, he's such a weakling, compared to the perfect beauty that is me... (No offense anyone. I like Sesshoumaru, too.)

Inuyasha: WHY I OUGHTA!!!

Kagome: SIT!

Inuyasha: *sits*

Inuyasha was going to answer her with his normal curses and name-calling

Sango: I've never seen an occasion when he would reply otherwise.

when an evil crackle echoed though their prison.

Kagome: And what's with the evil cackles, too? Are they taught in some school for evil people?

Sesshoumaru: Actually, yes. Evil Cackling, 101, at the Anything Goes School of Evil Youkai, Hanyou, Oni, and Witches.

They both stiffened as their captor appeared. She was an old old witch.

Sango: Aren't they always?

Sesshoumaru: It's a requirement. Witches have to be old.

Sango: Ahh...

With weathered white hair, half of it fallen out. Missing teeth, withered skin and an evil gleam in her fiery eyes.

Miroku: Hmm... you know, that could describe Sesshoumaru and Inuyasha when they get old. *Gets pounded into a pulp by both brothers*

A jewel shard glowed in her left cheek.

Inuyasha: JEWEL SHARD!!!

Kagome: Calm down, Inuyasha. It's just a story.

Inuyasha: Damn. *Pouts* But I wanted a jewel shard...

"Welcome young ones. How nice of you to stay."

Miroku: Thank you for having us.

Sango: Houshi-sama, if I'm not mistaken, we're not there.

Miroku: Oh. *Grins* Then does that mean...

Sango: No, Miroku, I seriously doubt in this story that we are.

Miroku: Damn.

"Let us out you old HAG!"

Sesshoumaru: My brother's social skills leave something to be desired...

Inuyasha: At least I'm not like you.

Sesshoumaru: Something that we are all thankful for.

The witch's eye focused on Inuyasha, her face betrayed her fury.

Sango: Kagome's right. These people DO write bad.

Kagome: *Shrugs* I've seen worse.

All: There's WORSE???

Kagome: Oh yeah.

"Old am I. Hanyou, I won't be old for long. With the power of this jewel…and this lovely young girl's virgin blood. I shall regain my youth."

"My blood?"

Kagome: What is it with people wanting to use my blood or soul or whatever in rituals? It gets annoying after a while.

Inuyasha: It gets annoying for you? I'M the one stuck rescuing you.

Kagome looked white, her eyes wide.

"Yes yes of course. I am sorry my dear.

Kagome: If she were sorry, SHE WOULDN'T BE TRYING TO KILL ME!!!!

But as they say youth is always wasted on the young. But not for long."

"BITCH!"

Inuyasha attacked the old woman…only to have his claws pass right though her. He swiped again…the image of the witch fell apart like a cloud of smoke. Her laughter crackling though the air.

Inuyasha: That's not me. I'm smarter than to try that. Right guys?

Others: *All suddenly find the walls, ceiling, and floor to be very interesting*

Inuyasha: -_-' Thanks... nice to know I can always count on you.

"Don't worry Hanyou, I shall let you go as soon as I'm done. I have no use for you."

Miroku: (Witch) Except as my love slave! *Gets whacked again*

Inuyasha and Kagome had just made themselves comfortable so they could sulk (and to think of a way out) when the witch appeared again suddenly.

"I forgot to ask. You are a virgin right?"

Kagome: WHAT???? OF COURSE I AM!!!!

Kagome turned bright red.

"OF COURSE I AM."

All: *Stare at Kagome*

The witch smiled.

"Just making sure."

Kagome: *Fuming, which makes Inuyasha and Sango DISCREETLY scoot away from her a bit*

And she disappeared.

Kagome still blushing refused to meet the eyes of Inuyasha. His ears twitched…

Inuyasha: *Ears twitch*

"I wonder why it's so important that you be a virgin?"

Kagome: SIT!

Inuyasha: *Sits* HEY!!! WHAT WAS THAT FOR!!!!

Kagome: Sorry. Reflex.

Kagome choked…how dare he talk about that! She replied hotly…as she seriously considered a good fat sit right then.

Inuyasha: *Whimpers* Please don't...

"She did say the potion needed a virgins blood. I guess it won't work unless her victim is a virgin!"

Miroku: *Trademark lecherous grin* Of course, I could always help you change that, Kagome... *Gets whacked by Sango's boomerang, which magically appears out of sub-space*

"Feh…to bad your ain't one."

"WHAT!"

Inuyasha: *Cowers*

Kagome: *Giving him dangerous looks*

Inuyasha blinked at Kagome's outraged shout.

Sango: All of us would do more than just blink. We would run for our lives.

"Well…"

He started…he saw the look in her eyes and hurried to explain. He really wasn't in the mood for a sit.

Inuyasha: I never am, moron.

"Witches aren't known for their cruelty.

Sesshoumaru: Yes they are.

They don't bother others unless they need something from them.

Sesshoumaru: Yes they do.

If you weren't a virgin then she might let you go."

Inuyasha: Kagome... I think I've just figured out what a lemon is. It's a story about... you know... mating... right?

Miroku: Now look who's being the perverted one.

Kagome: *Is very, very red* Actually... Inuyasha's right...

Sango: And Naraku said that this is a Kagome / Inuyasha story, so that means...

*The other four take a few seconds to contemplate this*

All except Kagome: OH MY GOD!!!!!!!

Inuyasha: NARAKU YOU (^(*^)*&^(*&^)*^)*&%*^)*&^)(^)*&!!!!!!!!!

Sesshoumaru: PLEASE DON'T TELL ME I HAVE TO READ ABOUT MY LITTLE BROTHER DOING THAT!!!

Sango: LET ME OUT OF HERE RIGHT NOW!!!!

Miroku: Can I have some popcorn? *Gets whacked many, many times*

Kagome blinked her cheeks blushing even redder. He wasn't suggesting what she thought he was suggesting was he?

"Don't you dare even think about it!"

Inuyasha: (to fic Inuyasha) YEAH!!! DON'T THINK ABOUT IT!!!

Know Inuyasha was really confused.

"What?"

"You were going to suggest we have sex so that witch would let me go! Weren't you!"

Miroku: Hmm... I really should try that next time Sango and I are imprisoned by a witch. *Has a few more bumps added to his head*

Inuyasha jaw dropped…his face turned as red as his outfit.

Kagome: *Sings* Inuyasha the red-faced Hanyou... *Gets strange looks* What?

Others: ... Nevermind...

"I WAS NOT!"

"WAS TO!"

"I WAS NOT! I was just speaking in theory.

Sesshoumaru: Yeah. In THEORY...

Inuyasha: COME ON!!!! LIKE I WOULD EVER DO THAT!!!

Miroku: Inuyasha's right. He wouldn't do that...

Inuyasha: Thank you.

Miroku: ... he doesn't have the guts.

Inuyasha: URK!!! *Whacks Miroku upside the head*

Kagome turned away…and shivered as she felt his stunned gaze on her back.

"Can't you get us out of here?"

Inuyasha grunted and folded his arms across his chest.

"If I could we would be long gone.

Inuyasha: Feh. Like I would ever run away from a fight.

That damn witch is to powerful with that jewel shard."

Inuyasha: SEE!!!! THAT'S NOT ME!!! I WOULD NEVER SAY SOMETHING LIKE THAT!!

Sango: You gotta admit, he's right. Inuyasha would never admit to being weaker than anything.

A soft sound made Inuyasha look toward Kagome again. He blinked and moved closer to her. Was Kagome crying?

Inuyasha: Not exactly hard to tell. She smells saltier and sadder, and it ain't that hard to hear her.

Kagome: ... I don't know how to take that...

Miroku: Kinda pathetic that he knows so easily what you're like when you cry.

Inuyasha: HEY!!!

"Kagome?"

Suddenly she turned her eyes filled with tears.

"I don't want to die like this Inuyasha."

Inuyasha: Then how do you want to die?

Kagome: I don't want to die, period.

Inuyasha: ... Can't argue with that logic.

She launched herself into his arms. Inuyasha blinked as Kagome made a hanky out of his komodo.

Sesshoumaru: Eww... snot...

Inuyasha: Now look who's being immature.

Sesshoumaru: I'm entitled to a few moments. What's your excuse?

Inuyasha: *Has to be sat again to keep from tearing his brother in half*

"Er…Kagome."

Inuyasha gulped. How in the nine hells was he supposed to do know?

Miroku: Seven.

Sango: Huh?

Miroku: There are seven hells.

Sango: Oh...

He didn't know anything about women.

Miroku, Kagome, and Sango: Got that right.

Inuyasha: Hey!

Kagome: Well, you don't...

Inuyasha: But you don't have to rub it in...

Even less about how to comfort them.

Sesshoumaru: If he knows nothing about women, and less about how to comfort them, then doesn't that mean that he knows less than nothing on the subject?

Sango: Hey... that should be impossible...

Sesshoumaru: This is Inuyasha we're talking about.

Miroku: True. That makes it possible.

Inuyasha: ... I don't have to take this.

Kagome: Yes you do... it's impossible to get out of here until the fic is over.

Inuyasha: Damn.

Normally if Kagome was in danger he just went in and kicked ass.

Inuyasha: Hey, if it works... *Shrugs*

But the witch had already proved…more than once (grumble grumble) that she had too much power. He couldn't even touch the old woman.

Inuyasha: Hah! No one is that strong!

Naraku: *Voice blares in* *Smugly* Except me.

Inuyasha: RUB IT IN, WHY DONCHA???

Nervously he placed his clawed hand on the back of Kagome's head. She didn't seem to notice.

Kagome: I think I would notice something like that... those claws are sharp.

Inuyasha: Duh. They gotta be, to use in a fight.

They were in real trouble this time. Well Kagome was at least.

Kagome: No kidding... SO RESCUE ME ALREADY!!!

The witch had said she was going to let him go.

But how could he just leave when Kagome was sure to die, just so that old hag could have her youth again.

Kagome: *Turns to Inuyasha* Would you really feel that way?

Inuyasha: Uh... um... *Points quickly* LOOK, NARAKU IN A BIKINI!!

Kagome: Come on, I'm not falling for that.

Naraku: *Leads a conga line past, consisting of him, Kagura, Kanna, Kikyo, and Kouga, with all of them wearing skimpy bikinis*

Kagome: ... Never mind...

There was absolutely nothing he could do…except.

Kagome: SIT!

Inuyasha: *Sits yet again* NOT ME, THE INUYASHA IN THE STORY!!!

Kagome: Sorry... reflex again.

Inuyasha eyes widened as he remembered what Kagome had shouted out in anger.

What she said was true…if he had…(gulp) sex with her. Then she wouldn't be a virgin anymore. The witch might let her go.

Sesshoumaru: And maybe not. She might just keep her and kill her out of spite.

This was ridiculous to even think about.

Sango: Yes it is. Like Kagome would ever go for that. Right?

Kagome: Well, if it was a choice between that and dying... nope, would still take the dying.

Kagome wouldn't go for that.

Kagome: Got that right.

She hated him…

Kagome: No I don't.

Inuyasha: At least there's that...

well maybe not hate but she sure in hell didn't like him that way.

Inuyasha: *Waits for Kagome to affirm that* ... Kagome?

Kagome: Uh... *Points* Look!! Kagura and Kouga are making out!

Others: Huh? *Turn and are scarred for life at the sight*

Sesshoumaru: *Covers his eyes* AHH!!! IT BURNS!!!

Although…Inuyasha thought, I wouldn't mind all that much.

Miroku: Nice to know that you're male.

Inuyasha: Just because I don't grope everything female that moves doesn't mean that I'm not male.

Kagome is very beautiful.

Kagome: Really Inuyasha?

Inuyasha: Uh... can I call a friend?

Kagome: ... No more game shows for you...

Inuyasha gave himself a mental slap. How could he even think about that?

He was being as perverted as Miroku.

Sango: That may be pushing it... Miroku can get pretty perverted.

Miroku: Thank you.

Sango: That wasn't a compliment.

Miroku: I know.

But…a part of his mind persisted…it might be the only way.

Inuyasha: NO, MIND!!! FIND ANOTHER WAY!!!

Kagome: Yeah! What he said!!

Sesshoumaru: PLEASE FIND ANOTHER WAY!!!

Inuyasha gulped. He just knew he was going to get sitted a thousands time for this.

Kagome: Naw. More like 100. After that my throat would probably be too sore to talk.

"Kagome?"

She lifted her head a little to know she was listening.

"Please don't get mad…or think I'm pervert. But…"

Kagome: You know, when you say that, I'm naturally gonna think you ARE one.

He trailed off.

He felt her stiffen against him. She then lifted her head her eyes blazing.

He held their gaze steadily. He had to make her understand this was the only way.

All except Miroku: PLEASE LET THERE BE ANOTHER WAY!!!

Miroku: *Has settled back to enjoy the show with some popcorn... where he got it, I don't think we want to know...*

The fury slowly disappeared as she continued to stare at him.

Inuyasha: It's not polite to stare.

Kagome: Since when have you been concerned with polite?

Inuyasha: Good point.

His eyes reflected his thoughts as if he had spoken them aloud for the world to hear.

Miroku: (Inuyasha) HEY, WORLD, I'M GONNA GET KAGOME PREGNANT WITH MY KIDS NOW!!! COME ON AND WATCH!!! *Gets whacked*

"Kagome…I don't want you to die."

Kagome: I don't want me to die, either, BUT FOR THE LOVE OF KAMI-SAMA, PLEASE, FIND ANOTHER WAY!!!

"But Inuyasha…I…"

Inuyasha leaned down before she could finish her sentence and softly kissed her.

Sango: Aww...

Kagome and Inuyasha: O_O *Edge away from each other*

He closed his eyes as he savored the kiss. Her lips were like silk.

Miroku: Hmm... care to test to see if it's true, Kagome-sama? *Gets whacked YET AGAIN*

After a moment he lifted his head up and saw the stunned look in her eyes.

"This is the only way. I…"

Sesshoumaru: NO!!! THERE HAS GOT TO BE ANOTHER WAY!!! PLEASE DON'T MAKE ME SIT THROUGH THIS!!!

He blushed slightly.

Inuyasha: Only slightly? I would think I would be redder than the sunset by then.

"I'm your friend…and I know you don't feel that way toward me. But hmm I would be honored if you would let me save you."

Kagome: THEN BREAK DOWN THE BARRIER AND GET ME THE HELL OUT OF THERE!!!

Kagome continued to stare at Inuyasha in shock.

The thing was it wasn't because he was asking if he could…(blush)…it was because of how gentle he sounded.

Inuyasha: Me?

Kagome: Gentle?

Sango: The author's kidding, right?

Miroku: I should hope so.

And how the kiss, her first kiss had literally been everything she had always dreamed about.

Inuyasha: Have you really never been kissed before.

Kagome: *Blushes and looks down before nodding slightly*

Sango: Then how would you know if Inuyasha were a good kisser or not?

Kagome: ... Good question.

Kagome blinked and looked away from his eyes before she got lost in them. Her cheeks felt like they were on fire.

Miroku: Anyone know a water spell?

Kagome: Miroku... that's just a metaphor...

Miroku: Oh... what's a metaphor?

Kagome: *Slaps her forehead* Never mind...

But that was nothing compared to the slow heat that was starting to tingle in the pit of her belly.

Kagome: Oh Kami-sama... I'm too young to be reading this!!! Much less experiencing it!!

Inuyasha: ... Just kill me now...

Sesshoumaru: I would, but then who would kill me to put me out of MY misery? If I have to suffer, you have to suffer, too.

Inuyasha: Damn.

She had always thought Inuyasha to be brave and handsome.

Inuyasha: Really?

Kagome: If you require me to answer that, I swear, I will use the "s" word.

But his gruff guy attitude always turned her away;

Inuyasha: That's kinda the point. People that get close to me tend to... die.

Kagome: Aww... poor puppy... *Hugs Inuyasha*

Inuyasha: *Turns an interesting shade of red*

she never dreamed that he might find her attractive as well.

Kagome: *Strangely quiet*

Inuyasha: ... I'm not even gonna ask on that one.

Or did he…he didn't really say that. He just said that he would be honored.

Kagome: Hey... that's right!!!

Inuyasha: Uh... no speaky language?

Kagome: ...

Suddenly without reason she had to know. Did he find her attractive?

Miroku: Actually, that's just being a female. And just don't say anything, Inuyasha. That way she can't get mad at you.

Inuyasha: What makes you think she would get mad at me.

Miroku: It's you.

Inuyasha: ... You just have to be right, don't you?

"Inuyasha…do you…I mean…do you think I'm pretty?"

Sesshoumaru: (Inuyasha) No. I think you're the ugliest thing on earth. *Gets whacked*

Inuyasha smiled, and Kagome heart literally melted in her chest.

Kagome: (heart) I'm melting! Melting!

"The truth? I think you're beautiful…except when you're sitting me."

All: *Burst out laughing*

Kagome: That would have been sweet, but he just had to add the S-I-T part.

Sango: *Nods in agreement*

Kagome blushed. He did find her attractive, and she was attracted to him.

She had a choice. Do what they had to…or die.

Kagome: I already told you. Die.

She didn't want to die…but she really didn't want to give up her innocence.

She had always promised herself she would wait until marriage.

But…if she didn't, then she never would get married.

Kagome: Like I said. DIE!!!

Kagome sighed…she really didn't have a choice.

Kagome: Yes I do.

Taking a deep breath Kagome looked back up at Inuyasha. Gathering her courage she nodded.

All except Miroku: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!

Miroku: *Grins* This will be interesting...

Suddenly her eyes flashed at his smug look.

Kagome: SIT!!

Inuyasha: *sits* WILL YOU QUIT THAT!!!

"However if you tell anyone about this Inuyasha I'll sit you so hard your grandchildren will be born with grass stains!"

Kagome: *Starts pondering if it would be possible* Hmm...

Inuyasha: Please don't...

He chuckled and lowered his head again. His lips met hers…nervously Kagome wrapped her hands around his neck

Sesshoumaru: Hopefully to strangle him.

Inuyasha: No such luck.

as he sought to deepen the kiss.

The warmth in her belly was turning into a fire.

Kagome: If there's a fire in my stomach, why am I not running around with smoke coming out of my nose screaming in pain?

Miroku: I believe that's another metaphor.

Kagome: I know. I was being sarcastic.

Kagome almost yelped as she felt his tongue slip across her lips, begging for entrance.

Inuyasha: Oh lord... this is where the actual... "lemon"... starts, right?

Kagome: Unfortunately, looks like it.

Miroku: This is gonna be fuuuuuuuuuun... *Gets whacked AGAIN*

Shyly she opened her mouth more him.

Kagome: ... I'm not even gonna touch that one.

Others: Huh?

Kagome: ... Don't ask... just... don't.

Instantly she found herself having a battle of the tongues.

Sesshoumaru: (tongue 1) En guard!

Miroku: (tongue 2) Thrust! Parry!

Sesshoumaru: (tongue 1) Touche!

Inuyasha, Kagome, and Sango: *Look at each other, and silently agree that Miroku and Sesshoumaru have gone crazy.*

They wrestled and fought for dominance.

Sesshoumaru: (Tongue 1) 1! 2! 3! Ding ding ding! I win!

Miroku: (Tongue 2) Hey! No fair! I was the one paid to win!

Kagome moaned as the fire spread.

Kagome: BAD FIRE!!! WHAT HAVE I TOLD YOU ABOUT SPREADING!!!

Inuyasha: (fire) I'm sorry! Please don't sit me!

Sango: *Decides that she's the only sane one left in the room. She's probably right*

She felt faint, as if she would fall had Inuyasha not been holding her.

Miroku: (Inuyasha) Oops. I slipped.

Sesshoumaru: (Kagome) WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU LET GO!!!! SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT!!

Inuyasha: ... Glad to see SOMEONE'S enjoying themselves.

Getting a little bolder Kagome ran her tongue against his.

Kagome: *Face getting redder* Oh Kami... *Sinks down in her seat*

Inuyasha: And it's just going to get worse?

Kagome: Oh yeah...

Inuyasha: *Whimpers pitifully*

Sesshoumaru and Miroku: *Laughing*

Naraku: *Voice comes over the intercom* I wouldn't laugh. I'm looking for lemons featuring you, too.

Both: *Start choking*

Inuyasha: *Satisfied smirk*

His was slightly surprised at how rough it was.

Sango: Does that mean that his tongue was surprised?

Kagome: Typo.

Sango: Oh.

It reminded her of Buyo's tongue when he licked her hand.

Inuyasha: THE CAT'S TRYING TO MAKE A CLAIM ON KAGOME??? I'LL RIP HIM TO SHREDS!!! *Sees the other four looking at him funny* Uh... don't mind me...

She suppressed a giggle…or reminder her more of a dogs tongue.

Kagome: Question... how would I know what a dog's tongue feels like in a french kiss?

Others: *Think about it, and get disgusted looks* Ugh...

She explored his mouth fully running her tongue up and down his sharp fangs.

Inuyasha: *Gleefully bares his fangs* Heh.

She shuddered in delight. She had always loved his teeth. She found the fang look very exciting.

Inuyasha: You do?

Kagome: Uh... look! Kouga streaking while holding a sign proclaiming that he's Kagura's love slave!

Others: Huh???

Kouga: *Streaks past, only wearing a sign that says "I'm Kagura's love slave, and proud of it!"*

Inuyasha: I could have done without seeing that...

Miroku and Sesshoumaru: *Nod in agreement*

Sango: Oh, I dunno... after all, that armor covered a pretty nice body...

Kagome: *Nods*

Finally they had to pull apart for air.

Sango: *Deciding that if you can't beat them, join them* (air) Okay, time! All right, 6 minutes! A new record!

Inuyasha looked down at her with lust and something else in his eyes.

Sesshoumaru: (eye 1) AHH!!! I'VE GOT SOMETHING IN ME!!

Miroku: (eye 2) GET IT OUT, GET IT OUT!!!

Kagome smiled shyly at him. She trusted him that was all that mattered.

Inuyasha: *Thinking* Kagome, you really do trust me, right?

Kagome: Yeah.

Inuyasha: Does that mean I can have the jewel when it's complete?

Kagome: We'll talk.

Suddenly Inuyasha lifted her into his arms. Kagome gasped but let him take her where he willed. Which was to a corner filled with straw, it had served as their bed the last two days.

Miroku: They were sharing a bed for two days, and they're only NOW getting around to it? *Gets whacked again*

Kagome blushed as he laid her down.

Smiling toothily Inuyasha bent down and started to nuzzle Kagome's neck.

Sango: Aww... How sweet...

Kagome: Uh... yeah...

She gasped as she felt his rough tongue boldly dart out and caress her flesh.

Miroku: (tongue) Wow, what nice flesh! I think I'll caress it!

Sango: Come on, couldn't you come up with something better?

Miroku: Hey, I'm new at this. Cut me some slack.

She stiffened as she felt as clawed hand slip up her shirt.

Kagome: SIT!!

Inuyasha: IT WASN'T ME!!

Miroku: I wish it was me, though. *Gets whacked... again...*

Inuyasha instantly stilled his hand and instead started to kiss her again.

Sesshoumaru: *Frowns* Why is he taking so long? Just get rid of the clothes, take her, and get it over with.

Kagome: *Bops him upside the head* SOME people like to go slow.

Sesshoumaru: *Too stunned at her actually hitting him upside the head to retaliate*

As he kissed her his hand moved again. Until it rested up against the swell of her breasts.

Miroku: *Glazed look, and is drooling*

Sango: We've lost him.

Kagome: *Face buried in her hands* *Groans* Why me?

Kagome gasped as his hand groped her.

Inuyasha: Now I've figured it out! That's not me, it's Miroku dressed like me! *Gets a lot of funny looks* Okay, so it's really far-fetched, but hey, it could happen!

She never though anything could feel like this.

She felt her nipples, which were suddenly extremely sensitive harden as his thumb brushed over them.

Miroku: *Opens his mouth, but is whacked by Sango's giant boomerang before he can say anything*

It happened so fast she didn't even realize that Inuyasha had somehow gotten her shirt off.

Kagome: Sit!

Inuyasha: *Sits* Maybe I should just stay down here... hey, gum!

Kagome blushed again as his kissed started to go lower. His tongue lapped gentle against eh beginning of the swell of her breast.

Suddenly he growled.

"How the hell do you get this thing off?"

Kagome: *Takes a moment to think about it, and suddenly bursts out laughing*

Others: *Unanimously decide that she's lost it*

Kagome giggled as she realized he had been trying to get her bra off.

Kagome: He wouldn't succeed, anyways. Males seem to find it impossible to deal with them.

Inuyasha: Kagome, what's a bra?

Kagome: Sit!

Inuyasha: What did you do that for, bitch?? I just asked you what a bra is!

Sitting up Kagome reached behind her and undid the clasped. She gave him a timid look before removing her bra.

Kagome: Why am I going through that willingly! I already said, I would rather die!

Inuyasha: *Gives her a hurt look* So you're saying that you hate me that much?

Kagome: No. Just that I would rather not be forced to do that just to get out of a trap.

Inuyasha: Oh. Okay.

Instantly he moved in. Kagome gasped as she felt his hot mouth incase one of her nipples. She moaned as he started to suckle like a puppy again, his teeth now showed her knew heights of pleasure as they gently nipped her.

Inuyasha: *Thinking about the puppy comment* Hey, what if that did result in a pup?

Kagome: Then I would be sitting you until you were in America while pregnant and in labor. And I would make sure you were over sharp, jagged rocks beforehand, in hopes that you would never be able to father a puppy again.

Inuyasha: *Whimpers and crosses his legs*

Sesshoumaru and Miroku: *Do the same*

Miroku: That's just cruel...

Kagome: That's the point.

All 3 guys: *Edge away from her fearfully*

He then suddenly switched and tortured the other breast as he had the first.

"Kagome…"

Kagome: Sorry, I'm not here right now, I'm trying to FIGURE OUT A WAY TO GET OUT OF THERE WITHOUT SCREWING EACH OTHER SENSELESS!!!

Kagome groaned at the sound of his husky voice.

Inuyasha: Just kill me... cause I know I'll be sat, even if that's not me in the story...

Sango: Sorry. We suffer, you suffer, too.

He then stopped his torture long enough to remove…all…of his clothing.

Kagome blushed as she stared at his thin but hard toned body.

Miroku: Why is it that the author wrote you in with a nice body?

Inuyasha: Maybe because I DO have a nice body. You don't fight demons and fend for yourself your whole life without SOME benefits.

Her gaze slowly made its way south

Miroku: (gaze) Now, which way is south? Dangit, I lost the compass. Oh well. I'll just walk around in circles.

until she saw it.

Sesshoumaru: (it) EEK! DON'T LOOK AT ME!

She blinked as a tiny bit of fright fluttered in her heart.

Kami he's huge.

Miroku: Would that be one of the "benefits"?

Inuyasha: *Cheeks turn red*

Try Kagome had seen Inuyasha naked before…

Inuyasha: *Looks at Kagome* You have?

Kagome: Uh... um... no comment?

Inuyasha: *Glares at her, and decides he'll get the answer from her later*

but never when he was excited like he was. He was truly something to behold.

Miroku: Behold! A naked inu hanyou, for your viewing pleasure! *Gets whacked many times by Inuyasha*

Kagome turned her head and blushed.

Kagome: *Cheeks are red* Just why did this have to be our first assignment?

Naraku: *Voice comes over the intercom* Because I'm evil. Oh, and Kagura wants to know if you've seen Kouga.

All: *Point to where the wolf youkai is now running around on the ceiling proclaiming at the top of his lungs that he loves being a love slave... then he starts singing the "I'm too Sexy" song... badly...*

Inuyasha: Please get him out of here, before we're all permanently scarred for life.

Kouga: *Disappears*

Inuyasha laid down beside her. Gently kissing and touching until her fright of him disappeared.

Kagome smiled against Inuyasha lips as a plan formed in her mind.

Sesshoumaru: (Plan) *Forms* Ah! I'm inside a mind!

She wasn't quite as innocent as everyone thought.

Sango, Sesshoumaru, Miroku, and Inuyasha: *Look at Kagome warily*

Kagome: YES I AM!!!

Not in that way, but another. She was an avid reader of romance novels…very steamy romance novels.

Kagome: No I'm not. *Thinking* How did the author find that out?

She knew a thing or two.

Kagome: No I don't. At least on that account.

Suddenly to Inuyasha's surprise Kagome pushed against him so that he fell over onto his back.

Everyone: *Burst out laughing*

Inuyasha: As if Kagome would be strong enough to do that!

He blinked in surprise as she smiled down at him.

"My turn Inuyasha."

Kagome: Please don't tell me that's what's going to happen, please don't tell me that's what's going to happen...

Sango: I get the feeling that this is gonna be bad...

Kagome: *Keeps repeating the above stuff*

She then kissed his lips. As her hands ran across his chest…she really did like his body.

Inuyasha: You do?

Kagome: *Looks down and mutters something, which Inuyasha catches*

Inuyasha: *Leans back with a satisfied smirk.*

It was almost to perfect to be real.

Sesshoumaru: The author must be exaggerating. No hanyou has a body that good. Myself, on the other hand...

Inuyasha: Prove it.

Sesshoumaru: Fine. *Stands up and takes off the upper part of whatever that thing's called that he wears* (P.S. To Fluffy's fangirls: You're welcome.)

Sango and Kagome: *Puddles of drool form on the floor*

Inuyasha: Hey! Mine is better! *Takes off the top part of his outfit* (To Inuyasha's fangirls: You're welcome, too.)

Kagome and Sango: *Go into bishie overload* *Stare ahead blankly with the puddles of drool slowly grow larger*

Taking him again by surprise her kisses started to get lower.

Kagome: *Snaps out of it* Oh no... *Starts hitting her head against the seat in front of her* Damn, damn, damn...

Inuyasha: What? What's so bad?

Kagome: You don't want to know... but you'll find out eventually.

Inuyasha: ... Should I be afraid?

Kagome: Yes. Be afraid. Be very afraid.

She flicked her tongue over a hard male nipple, thus making him moan.

Miroku: Hmm... care to try sometime, Sango, to see if that really happens? *Gets a few new bumps added to his head*

Inuyasha closed his eyes as Kagome started to kiss him all over.

Miroku: Does that mean she kissed his...

Sango: *Whacks Miroku hard* Hentai.

What was she doing? Was it something she learned from the future?

Miroku: If so, then I really need to spend more time in Kagome's time. *Gets whacked... again...* (we've lost count on how many times he's been whacked in this MST alone)

Well he didn't care as long as she didn't stop. He knew that in her time, these things were more openly discussed, so he assumed it was possible she knew things a normal virgin in his time wouldn't. How much did she know though?

Kagome: You would be surprised.

Inuyasha: Oh yeah? Like what?

Kagome: *Whispers something in his cute doggy ear*

Inuyasha: WHA??? THAT'S EVEN POSSIBLE???

Kagome: You have to be very flexible for it, but it's possible.

Inuyasha: *Starts pondering it* I still can't imagine how it's possible...

Kagome: It helps if you have a chair, a length of yarn, a pile of feathers, and strawberry jelly.

Inuyasha: Ah! Now I get it!

Inuyasha's eyes snapped open like a trap when suddenly he felt…OH KAMI…he tensed as he almost lost it. Only by sheer stubbornness did he get himself under control.

Sango: ... I don't get it.

Sesshoumaru: Me neither.

Miroku: I'm lost.

Inuyasha. Me too.

Kagome: *Is really red* Uh... I'll put it this way... mouth plus.. *Points at Inuyasha groin* that...

Sango: *Starts choking*

Guys: O_O

Miroku: Girls in your time do that?

Kagome: *Barely manages a nod*

Miroku: I REALLY gotta spend more time in Kagome's time...

Sango: *Too stunned to whack him*

He leaned up a little so he could watch her.

Did people in her time do this?

Miroku: Apparently, yes, and I gotta find a girl willing to do that with me... *Gets whacked again*

He leaned his head back as the pleasure coursed though his body.

Her mouth…her sweet sexy mouth was down there.

Kagome: Why me... *Looks up* WHY ME????

Inuyasha: I agree. *Looks up, too.* WHY ME????????

His hips jerked all by themselves as she startled to suckle slightly. Her tongue played pure hell on the tip of him.

Guys: O_O

Miroku: Inuyasha, you lucky dog.

Sesshoumaru: You know, I really must agree.

Inuyasha: WHY ME?????

Inuyasha dug his claws into the hay as he felt himself losing it.

Inuyasha: Wait. Does that mean...

Miroku: That he would...

Sesshoumaru: In her MOUTH??

He didn't want her to stop. Just the thought of exploding in her mouth was so exciting that he even became harder than he was.

Inuyasha: *Starts coughing and hyperventilating*

Miroku: *Stunned speechless*

Sesshoumaru: Tell me why I'm being tortured like this again?

But he wasn't sure if she would like that.

Kagome: Sit!

Inuyasha: I guess not...

But if she didn't stop right now it would happen!

Miroku: And then Inuyasha would be sat many, many times.

Inuyasha: Why isn't this thing over yet? The object is to save Kagome's life. THIS IS NOT SAVING HER LIFE!!!!

Kagome: I KNOW!!! PUT US OUT OF OUR MISERY!!!!

"Kagome! I can't…(huff)

Miroku: He can't huff? Yes he can, I've seen him do it a lot when he's sulking. Which is a lot of the time.

Inuyasha: I don't sulk.

Miroku, Sango, and Kagome: Yes you do.

Inuyasha: *Sulks*

He watched as she looked up at him, her eyes were sparkling in mischief.

Sesshoumaru: (eyes) EEK! WE'RE SPARKLING IN MISCHIEF!!

Sango: Just when we thought he had regained his sanity...

She softly nipped the tip with her teeth and sucked harder.

Kagome: Oh Kami-sama...

Inuyasha: *Whines* Why did we have to be the first victims?

That was all he needed.

Inuyasha stiffened as he lost it. His body jerked and bucked against her soft mouth as his seed spilled from him.

He watched as she swallowed it all, which surprisingly once again made him harder.

Sango, Miroku, Inuyasha, and Sesshoumaru: SHE SWALLOWED IT????

Sango and Kagome: *Faintly sick look*

There was just something so incredible sexy about that…he didn't know why but it was.

All: *Look green*

Sesshoumaru: *Uses the sick bag*

Miroku: Who would have thought that Sesshoumaru would be the first to loose whatever it is he ate last? Hey, what IS that? *Points to the even more disgusting than usual former contents of Fluffy's stomach*

Sesshoumaru: *Looks it over* Rin's cooking.

Others: *Terrified looks*

Sesshoumaru: Naraku is looking to torture us on all fronts...

Others: *Nod in agreement* *Don't trust themselves to speak*

Kagome wiped the side of her mouth as she looked down at him. She was on her knees…Suddenly he was up as well. He kissed her hard and fast.

Miroku: Someone is eager to get to the main event. *Gets whacked by Inuyasha and Kagome. Sango is tired out from whacking him a lot.*

His hands found her breasts again.

Inuyasha: *Looks very red*

He played with them as he slowly made his way behind her.

Kagome: *Starts coughing* Doggie style?

Inuyasha: What's wrong with that?

Sesshoumaru: We are DOG demons, you know. Or at least part.

Kagome: Oh yeah. Never mind.

He could tell she was suddenly very nervous.

Kagome: No kidding... I'M ABOUT TO GET IT DOGGIE STYLE FROM MY BEST FRIEND, CAUSE IT'S EITHER THAT OR GET KILLED BY A WITCH FOR A YOUTH POTION!!! OF COURSE I'M GONNA BE A LITTLE NERVOUS!!!

Others: *Edge away*

He kissed the back of her neck.

Sesshoumaru: What? No mating grip?

Others: Huh?

Sesshoumaru: When a dog demon is about to mate, he will grip the back of his mate's neck in his teeth. To reassure her.

Kagome: Could it also be to keep her from escaping?

Sesshoumaru: Yes, it has that function, too.

Kagome: Thought so. *Her and Sango whack Fluffy-sama.*

"Don't worry Kagome."

Kagome: I'm worried.

She nodded and let him push her upper body forward. So that she was on her hands and knees.

Miroku: Wow. Twice in five minutes. I'm impressed.

Sesshoumaru: Demons, especially dog demons, have much more stamina than a human.

Miroku: Lucky...

Sesshoumaru: I know.

Inuyasha took a deep breath to steady himself. He wanted this so bad that he was afraid he might lose it.

Kagome: SIT SIT SIT!!!

Inuyasha: FOR THE LAST TIME, THAT'S NOT ME!!!!

But he had to go slow…she was a virgin.

Miroku: Good job, Inuyasha. Going slow and being gentle for her first time.

Inuyasha: *While whacking Miroku* THAT'S NOT ME!!!!

She was his friend. He would never hurt her.

Kagome: You know... that was kinda... sweet...

Inuyasha: So you won't sit me anymore for the rest of the MST?

Kagome: Not THAT sweet.

Kagome shifted nervously. She should have known he would want it 'doggy style'.

Kagome: *Hits her head* Of course... Why would an inu hanyou want it any other way...

Inuyasha: There are other ways?

Kagome: *Doesn't wanna answer that, so just says the "s" word*

Kagome would had giggled, except for the fact she was so nervous she could hardly breathe.

Sesshoumaru: And she passed out, and died. The End, let's leave.

Kagome: I wish it were that simple...

The fire was the only thing that kept her going.

Sesshoumaru: (fire) And, hup-two-three-four! Double time! Keep moving!

The fire had spread throughout her body consuming her.

Miroku: (Kagome's body) Ahh! I'm on fire! Put it out, put it out!

She wanted more, she wanted him.

Miroku: Will she take a monk instead? *Gets whacked by everyone, even Fluffy*

She stiffened as she felt him rub up against her.

Kagome: Kami-sama... just end my misery now...

Inuyasha: I'll never be able to live this down...

She could feel him throbbing.

Kagome: *Makes a funny noise in the back of her throat while with a look of horror on her face*

Inuyasha: *Curled into a fetal ball, rocking back and forth* This is not happening, this is not happening...

"Kagome…"

She took a deep breath as he started to push forward. He did so with one quick and almost violent thrust…he broke through her maidenhead and buried himself to the hilt.

Kagome and Sango: *Wince and cross their legs*

Sesshoumaru: What's with you two?

Sango: Imagine getting kicked in the crotch by a very pissed off Inuyasha...

Guys: *Cross their legs*

The pain was sharp and made her suddenly gasp. Tears sprung into her eyes as Inuyasha forced himself into her.

Kagome: SIT!

Inuyasha: What was that for, wench???

Kagome: You're supposed to be GENTLE with a girl her first time! I've heard that it really hurts, for crying out loud!

Inuyasha: IT'S NOT ME!!!!!!!

She wanted to scream,

Sesshoumaru: (Kagome) *Screams*

she wanted to cry

Miroku: (Kagome) *Fake cries*

…she wanted him.

Sango: Even after all that?

Kagome: Geez.

She shook as a different burning seared her flesh down there.

Sesshoumaru: Inuyasha, did you set your crotch on fire again?

Miroku: Huh?

Sesshoumaru: When we were puppies, I dared Inuyasha to jump over a small bonfire...

Inuyasha: *Winces at the memories*

She had no idea it hurt so much.

Kagome: Yes I do.

Suddenly she felt his hair against her back, and his breath in her ear.

Miroku: *Sits back and enjoys the mental imagery his hentai mind is able to provide*

"Shh…its all right Kagome. Don't cry."

Kagome: You're right, Inuyasha. It's not you. You would never be able to be that gentle and stuff.

Inuyasha: Finally, you listen to me. *Thinks about that last comment* HEY!

His voice was so soft and caring.

Sango: Kagome's right. It's just someone dressed up to look like Inuyasha.

He then started to move within her. At first it was unpleasant and painful.

Girls: *Wince and cross their legs again*

But as her body began to get use to him something else started.

Sesshoumaru: (something else) Hey, look at me, I started! ... now I just gotta figure out what it is that I started...

Inuyasha: ... Kagome, I'm scared...

Kagome: So am I, Inuyasha... so am I...

It was a tension that she never felt before.

Kagome: I should HOPE so!

The fire raged and was gaining heat each time he thrust into her.

Kagome and Inuyasha: *Have identical shades of red on their faces*

"Inuyasha…"

She gasped his name as he started to go faster.

Kagome: Please let this be over soon...

Inuyasha: *Is back in the fetal position again, sucking his thumb*

Kagome closed her eyes as little lights started to flash in front of her eyes.

Kagome: Okay, where did the photographers come from?

Others: Photographers?

Kagome: *Quickly gives them a condensed version of what that means*

She couldn't stand this…the pressure. Something was happening, it was…coming.

Kagome: ... That's it, Naraku dies, once I get my hands on him...

Inuyasha: You'll have to wait. I'm first in line.

Suddenly the damn broke…

Inuyasha: The damn what?

Sesshoumaru: Huh?

Inuyasha: It says the damn broke, I'm wondering what damn thing broke.

Kagome: *Sighs* Typo...

Both: Ohhhh...

pleasure intense that it was painful shot through her body like lighting. Her body jerked and muscles contracted around Inuyasha.

Inuyasha: *Crosses his legs* Hey! That's something vital!

A moment later he joined her high in the clouds.

Miroku: How did they get out of the prison?

Kagome: *Sighs* Just an expression...

He screamed her name as he pumped wildly. No longer in control of his own body. He couldn't stop himself as he slammed into her soft round ass.

Sango: Couldn't the author be a little less...

Others: Crude? *Sango nods*

Kagome: Unfortunately, this is relatively mild for an author. A lot are much worse.

Others: *Wince*

Couldn't stop…even if he wanted to, and he didn't, as his seed spilled into her.

Inuyasha: Question... has anyone ever thought of the possibility of a puppy from that? *Points to the screen*

Kagome: Author probably didn't.

As quickly as it had come it was over. Gasping for breath Inuyasha slipped out of Kagome's warm passage and fell to the side.

Sesshoumaru: *Raises an eyebrow* Come on, even my pathetic brother wouldn't be THAT weak after just a couple of rounds.

Inuyasha: Uh... thanks... I think...

She fell over as well, snuggling close to him for warmth.

Kagome and Inuyasha: *Have traumatized looks on their faces*

Kagome: Well... at least it's over...

After a moment Inuyasha realized she was crying.

Inuyasha: He's gonna screw up and say something stupid that will make her sit him a bunch of times. I know from personal experience.

Others: *Surprised that it's Inuyasha, of all people, that said that*

"Kagome?"

She didn't answer him.

Miroku: *Whacks Inuyasha*

Inuyasha: HEY!! WHAT WAS THAT FOR???

Miroku: For killing Kagome.

Inuyasha: I DID NOT KILL KAGOME!!

"I'm sorry for getting you into this. For making you do this."

Kagome: *Laughs* Trust me, I doubt Inuyasha could make me do THAT. I would s-i-t him a couple hundred times.

Inuyasha: True, not like I would try.

Kagome: Are you saying I'm not attractive?

Inuyasha: No... you see... what I meant was...

Kagome: SIT!

Inuyasha: *Sits* When am I gonna learn to keep my mouth shut?

He suddenly felt like the scum of the earth.

Sesshoumaru: As a hanyou, he is.

Kagome: Don't make me put a rosary on YOU.

Sesshoumaru: *Cowers* I'll be good...

Now that the passion was spent Kagome was crying over her lost innocence.

Inuyasha: What innocence? By the standards of my time, she's nowhere near innocent.

Kagome: SIT SIT SIT!!

Inuyasha: *Groans in pain from the Inuyasha shaped crater on the floor*

Naraku: *Voice comes over intercom* Hey, be careful. I paid good money for this thing.

"Inuyasha…it's not that."

Miroku: (Kagome) It's just that you never asked me to bear you puppy, so what am I supposed to do now?

Curious but not convince Inuyasha titled his head so that she would go on.

Kagome: Hmm... Inuyasha, tilt your head.

Inuyasha: Why?

Kagome: JUST DO IT!

Inuyasha: *Whimpers as he does so*

Kagome: *Takes a good look at him* KAWAII!! *Rubs his ears*

Inuyasha: -_-'

"Its just that…Inuyasha…"

She looked up her brown eyes so deep he was afraid he might get lost in them.

Sesshoumaru: (Inuyasha) Help, I'm lost in someone's eyes!

Inuyasha: That wasn't funny... that was just... weird.

"I think I've fallen in love with you.

Kagome: Yeah, sure, the love admission after the sex. So cliche.

Inuyasha: *Staring at Kagome* You do?

Kagome: Allow me to quote you, Inuyasha... *clears her throat* THAT'S NOT ME!!!

I'm sorry Inuyasha."

Miroku: (Kagome) I forgot to tell you that I'm bearing Miroku's child. *Gets whacked*

Inuyasha blinked…

Inuyasha: *Blinks*

Kagome: Riiiiiiiiiight...

Kagome in love with him? Him the half demon dog jerk…

Miroku: Got the jerk part right. *Gets whacked by Inuyasha*

the one that she always yelled at, the one that always got her into trouble?

Inuyasha: Excuse me. WHO gets WHO in trouble?

Kagome: Shut up.

The thought pierced his heart as easily as one of her arrows might.

Inuyasha: More easily, probably. I could catch any arrow shot at me now.

She loved him…

Kagome: Don't say a word.

Inuyasha: *Closes his mouth and sulks*

Something feeling…a strange feeling started to surface.

Sesshoumaru: That sentence made little sense.

At first he couldn't place it. He had never felt this way before.

Miroku: Yeah. He had never felt like running around in one of Kagome's outfits singing a children's song. *Gets whacked... again... (if you've managed to keep count, then it's probably over 25 now)*

Then it hit him…of kami…he moaned.

Miroku: As he turned into a ghost.

"Kagome…damnit…"

Sango: (Inuyasha) You took the last Ramen! *Laughs and high-fives with Miroku and Fluffy, as Kagome and Inuyasha look at the youkai exterminator like she's lost it... which she probably has*

He grabbed her chin to force him to look at her.

"I love you to."

Sango: Aww...

Kagome: That would be sweet, if it weren't so cliche.

The then stopped and thought about it.

"Except when you say sit."

All: *Burst out laughing*

Kagome blinked in surprise then smiled and snuggled closer.

In no time at all they fell asleep.

Inuyasha: Definitely not me. Come on, I'm smart enough to not fall asleep at a time like that! Anything could attack while we're vulnerable!

Unknown to them while they slept the magic spell that kept them trapped

Miroku: Did a cute little dance while singing Barney songs. *Notices the weird looks everyone else is giving him* What?

Others: *Look away, whistling*

Kagome: *Wonders what the number of the insane asylum is*

disappeared.

Kagome: Yay! We're free!

And a witch smiled happily and she walked out into the morning sunshine…

Miroku: A witch smiling...

Sango: *Shudders* Scary...

"Who says this old witch still hasn't got it…I'm still the matchmaker of the century."

All: Huh?

As she walked happily down the road secure in the knowledge that she had lead two people together yet again…

Kagome: YOU MEAN THAT ALL THAT WASN'T EVEN NECESSARY?

Inuyasha: THEY WENT THROUGH ALL THAT, AND KAGOME'S LIFE WASN'T REALLY IN DANGER???

Other three: *Edge away slowly*

she came upon another couple.

The witch laughed as the male got a sharp slap in the face for his advances.

Sango: That sounds familiar. *Glares at Miroku*

Miroku: Hey! I've behaved the whole MST! Give me a little credit!

Sango: I wouldn't call making hentai comments every chance you get "behaving".

"Hmmm…I can see those two need help as well. Well no one said being a love witch was going to be easy."

Kagome: Let us all bow our heads for a moment of silence for her new victims.

All: *Do so.*

And thus…Sango and Miroku found out the hard way, it's not nice to cross a witch :)

Sango: *Starts coughing* WHAT???

Miroku: YES!!! *Gets whacked by all four of the others*

The end.

Kagome: YAY!

Inuyasha: FINALLY!

They all filed out of the theater. Inuyasha and Kagome looked deeply disturbed, Sesshoumaru looked traumatized, and Sango kept whacking Miroku with her boomerang.

As soon as they walked into the control room, Kirara glomped Sango, Rin and Jaken latched onto Fluffy, and Shippou tackled Kagome.

"You're back! You're finished! How was the story?"

"Terrible" Kagome said with a sigh.

"Awful" Inuyasha added.

"Traumatizing" Sesshoumaru gasped out from the death grip of Rin and Jaken.

"Naraku is EVIL" Sango put in.

"I liked it." Miroku said cheerfully.

The screen came on, showing Naraku. "I'm glad you did. I'm trying to find a Sango/Miroku for your next assignment. (Yes! ~ Miroku) I'll give you a while to recover. Ciao."

Kagome raised an eyebrow. "Naraku shouldn't speak french. It's more disturbing than that lemon."

"Kagome, what's a lemon?" Shippou asked innocently. At her look of horror, he added "What?"

To be continued...

Yes, we know that they were out of character, but come on. If you were kidnaped, put on a satellite, and made to MST bad fanfics, would you be acting like yourself, too?

And sorry this MST is so bad. It's been a while since Sera has MSTed anything, and SSJ has never done one.

This is Sera saying, over and out.