InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Palm of Your Hand ❯ I Won't Be Found ( Chapter 1 )

[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]

Disclaimer: InuYasha is the property of Rumiko Takahashi, not me. I'm just having fun and making no money doing it.

I Won't Be Found

She must have tried the well a hundred times that first day. That was back when she still had hope.

She thought she would die if she didn't hold onto hope. Eventually she realized that holding on to hope when there was none was what would ultimately kill her. Still, for over two years she held on. At first trying the well every single day. She prayed and she wished. She meditated, and tried to open the portal using her spiritual powers, but it wasn't meant to be. While her powers were still strong, not even the tiniest spark of magic could be found in the time portal itself.

She was completely devastated, and there was no one she could talk to that would understand. She spent most of her time in her own mind. Daydreaming about her adventures in the Sengoku Jidai; about things that were, things that could have been, and things that would never be. Did her friends miss her? Did he miss her? Did he move on with his life or was he stuck, like her, holding onto hope?

As much as she wanted to believe that what she had felt was real, she eventually resigned herself to the idea that maybe her fifteen year-old mind had romanticized her experiences and her feelings for him. This prospect seemed more and more likely with each passing day. She had put him on a pedestal that no man, unlikely even he himself, could live up to. If she met him today would she even feel the same way she had felt back then, or would the reality of him pale in comparison to the graven image in her memory? It didn't matter. He was long dead now, and even if he wasn't, he wouldn't recognize the person she now was.

Her eighteenth birthday was the day she had finally let go. That day she made a conscious decision to stop dreaming and start living. She lowered herself into the well one last time, and with her feet firmly planted in the undeniable truth, she closed the door on the most painful chapter of her life. That night she packed her suitcase, said goodbye to her family, and took a cab to the airport with no specific destination in mind.

She needed a fresh start, and what better way to wipe her slate clean than to begin a whole new life from the ground up. She had faced many terrifying things in her short life, but she had never been more afraid than she was in that moment.

<<>>

"Kagome, what are you wearing?" Ru said with a look of disgust as Kagome came in the door.

"Hey! I'll have you know that I get a lot of compliments on these over-alls." she argued. "You know, a lot of people happen to think they're cute!"

"Yeah, horny old guys with 'farmer's daughter' fantasies." he joked.

Kagome rolled her eyes as she plopped down next to him on the sofa. "You're gross."

"I'm not the one wearing those heinous over-alls." he shot back.

"Well, it's my new uniform so you are just going to have to get used to it. I think they're going for an apple orchard theme or something…" she said, looking down at her blue and white striped over-alls and red and black gingham shirt.

"Well, you look like a scarecrow."

Kagome worked the early shift at a local bakery and coffee shop. The owner liked to change themes with the seasons, and even though she worked mostly in the kitchen before the store opened, she was still required to wear the uniform. It was just a part-time gig. She also worked waitressing at the bar across the street at night. After closing at the bar she would head straight to the bakery, where she spent the early morning hours making breakfast pastries.

"Kagome, you've got to protest this atrocity. What if 'Mr. Right' comes along and sees you wearing these?" he said as he hooked a finger under one of her gallouses. "You're gonna end up an old hag for sure…"

Ru paused for a moment, before adding, "Oh, who am I kidding. 'Mr. Right' probably already came along and you never called him back. As much as I love living with you, I'd be remiss if I didn't say something. Those ovaries aren't gonna last forever."

"I'm twenty-six years old, Ru. Don't you think you're being a little dramatic?"

"I'm always a little dramatic, Kagome." he said with a smirk. "You should be used to me by now."

She loved Ru, she really did, and she knew he only wanted her happiness, but he'd been beating this dead horse for far too long. She had found that there was no winning with him. Of all the stubborn ass people on planet earth, she had managed to find the only one person more stubborn than herself. It was best not to engage him at all when he was going on one of his rants, which seemed to be triggered by just about anything as of late.

"Well at least I won't have to worry about you keeping me awake at night, 'cause there's no way in hell you are ever getting laid again as long as you're wearing those." he chuckled.

Kagome let out an exasperated sigh. "Are you done?" she said somewhat agitatedly.

Several seconds of silent stand-off later, and Ru conceded. "For now." he said, still having to get the last word.

"So, any plans today?" he asked, changing the subject.

"Well, I'm going to sleep now, then probably eat after that, then I'm going to work again." she said in a smart alecky tone. "What about you? Got a hot date or something?" she inquired facetiously.

"As a matter of fact, I have a date with the hottest person I've ever seen." he responded.

"You're talking about yourself, aren't you." she said flatly.

Ru let out a snort of laughter. "Why, Kagome, I had no idea you felt that way about me."

She rolled her eyes.

"Actually," he continued. "I'm supposed to have two pieces done for two different shows by next week and I haven't finished either. I just can't seem to get inspired." he sighed. "And one's for a fucking charity show too, so I won't get anything but a damn write-off."

Kagome chuckled. "Wow, that's very altruistic of you." she said sarcastically.

"You're one to talk. I don't see you sharing your muffins with the less fortunate." he chided jokingly.

"I can already see where this conversation is heading and I refuse to engage you." she said as she stood from the sofa.

"You know me too well." Ru laughed, shaking his head.

"Well, I'm going to bed. Don't wake me up unless my life is in danger." she said before heading to her bedroom.

<<>>

Being a single girl moving to a foreign country had been terrifying. Kagome had stayed in a hotel for almost two weeks before finding a room for rent in the classifieds, sharing an apartment with three art students. She couldn't really relate to her roommates, not being an artist or a student herself; but she never felt like she was imposing and she was happy to have people with whom she could share the rent. That is where she lived for the first few months of her new life. It was during that time that she met her current roommate, Ru.

On the insistence of her roommates, Kagome started going to various art exhibits at the local university. They said it was to 'give her some culture', but Kagome couldn't help but think they were really just trying to get her laid. She couldn't blame them. She had no life outside of work and it wouldn't kill her to get out and meet some new people. It was at one of these art shows that she saw what she thought might just be the most beautiful guy she had ever seen in her life. He was very tall, and had thick, glossy, shoulder-length black hair. His features were like chiseled marble and when he smiled, matching dimples appeared in the center of either cheek and she had to fight the urge to reach out and stick her fingers in them. Not only was he the best looking guy in the room, but he was the best dressed guy in the room as well. Something that Kagome would later learn was a reasonable indicator that a guy either had a girlfriend, or was gay. In Ru's case, it turned out to be the latter. Much to her disappointment at the time.

It was completely uncharacteristic of Kagome to just approach a guy. In fact, it was uncharacteristic of Kagome to be interested in a guy at all, but there was just something about Ru that drew her to him. Maybe it was the fact that they were the only two Japanese people in the room, at least in their age range. She wasn't quite sure, but looking back she prefered to think that they were destined to meet, despite the fact that she had been thoroughly fucked over by destiny in the past. She nonchalantly wedged her way into the crowd of fancy old snobs cooing over the paintings like they were looking through the glass in a maternity ward. As she approached him she couldn't help but notice his artwork. It seemed to be rather abstract. She couldn't tell what the hell it was supposed to be. 'Spaghetti and meatballs? Meatballs with faces...no, that doesn't seem right.' She wasn't great at initiating conversation with strangers, and fortunately she didn't have to. A smooth baritone voice pulled her out of her musings.

"Flatterers."

She turned her head. "What's that?" Kagome asked.

"Flatterers." he repeated, nodding towards the painting. "I was reading 'Dante's Inferno' when I did this piece. The flatterers in the eighth circle of hell were submerged to their necks in a ditch filled with human excrement." he said casually.

'What the fuck?' Kagome gulped loudly. "Oh," she said, somewhat disturbed. "Right….umm…" Looking into his eyes, she was finding it hard to gather her thoughts. 'What do I say. What do I say'.

"I thought it might be spaghetti and meatballs." she blurted out.

She instantly regretted opening her mouth. Awkward silence. 'Damn!' She mentally cursed herself. 'I really shouldn't be allowed out in public.'

Ru let out a sudden burst of laughter, and that set her mind at ease somewhat.

"I am so sorry!" Her face was on fire. "I don't even know why I said that. I think I'm just a little nervous." She was suddenly finding it very hard to look him in the eyes.

"No offense taken. That's the beauty of art. Different eyes see different things." he said. "And you have no reason to be nervous around me." Then he smiled, and of course, his teeth were perfect too.

"I'm Kagome Higurashi, by the way."

"Nice to meet you, Kagome." he said, extending his hand "Subaru Takahashi, but you can call me Ru. Everyone does. And don't bother with the car jokes, I've already heard them all." he said smiling.

She held her hand out to meet his, and instead of shaking it he brought it up to his lips and softly kissed her knuckles. Kagome just giggle and blushed.

Seeing her obvious discomfort, Ru, being a professional flirt if there ever was one, decided to lighten the mood with a little innocent teasing.

"So, is this just your first art show, or your first time out of the convent?" he said with a mischievous smile.

"Hey! What's what supposed to mean?!" she said, feining indignation. Her attempt at flirting felt more like flailing.

"Oh, I'm sorry, judging by your reactions, I was just assuming that I was the first man you'd ever seen." he laughed.

"Okay, yeah." she said. "I'm really not good at this."

"And by 'this' you mean…" he said questioningly.

"Hitting on someone." She cringed at her own words. Those damned words that continued to spring from her mouth against her will.

"Well, I should probably go ahead and tell you now, you aren't really my type…" Ru said hesitantly.

'Damn! DAMN! As if this situation could get any worse.' Kagome thought to herself.

"Oh." she said somewhat dejectedly. "Uh, yeah...it's...that's fine, I uh…".

"I'm gay." he cut in abruptly.

"Oh, I see." she said, a genuine smile forming on her face that covered her slight disappointment. "Well…" 'Damn.' " it really was nice meeting you…"

"The pleasure was all mine. And when I tell this story to my friends, I promise not to use your name, I'll just call you 'spaghetti and meatballs'." Ru joked.

Kagome continued to blush furiously. "Well, maybe I'll see you around."

And she did see him around. After running into him a couple more times at other art galleries, they struck up a fast friendship. It wasn't long before they decided to become roommates. Ru offered her his guest room for the same rent she was currently paying with three roommates. It was an offer she couldn't refuse, not that she had wanted to. His apartment was amazing. It was a large two bedroom loft in a building that had originally been a tire factory. The building was old, but it had underwent a complete overhaul no more than a decade ago. She had no idea how much Ru paid in rent each month, but she knew it couldn't be cheap. She just paid her dues and hoped she wasn't taking too much advantage of his generosity.

That was almost seven years ago, and in those seven years Kagome and Ru had grown inseparable. She would say they were best friends, or that he was 'like a brother' to her, but in truth neither of those accurately described the relationship between she and Ru. It was more like they had found in one another what they had lost in themselves.