InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Purity ❯ Pearls of Wisdom ( Chapter 25 )

[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]

InuYasha fell into step next to Kagome. She was smiling at nothing—or maybe it was everything—as he took her hand in his. It occurred to him again, as it had so many times before, that being with her, beside her, felt like being at home.

The companionable silence reigned as they walked. Kagome wore one of his dress shirts with a pair of his shorts. The entire ensemble was ridiculously large on her yet somehow, it looked perfect. Her clothes were folded and draped over her arm. They were so wrinkled from the dryer, though, that he had told her to wear something of his.

Movement caught the corner of his gaze as he took a bite of the roll he'd snatched before stepping out of the house, and InuYasha stopped, turning his head to look in the direction of the disturbance. In the shadows of the trees, a large white dog peered out at him. He discerned from her scent that she was a female, and as he stared at her, she bowed her head. Her coat was dull and dirty, and InuYasha could tell that it had been a long time since she had had a decent meal.

"Aww, the poor thing!" Kagome murmured as she knelt down on the ground. She made soothing noises to coax out the animal. The dog shied away. "It's so skinny."

InuYasha could sense the animal's reluctance to come out of hiding. He held the roll out toward the dog. Slowly, she crept forward but stopped after a few steps. He could tell that she desperately wanted the offered food. Without really thinking, he growled low in his throat. Kagome didn't react as though she'd heard the noise, but the dog crept a little closer. InuYasha tossed out the roll, making eye contact with the creature as he did so. The dog bowed her head slightly, in deference to InuYasha's gesture, grabbed the roll, and ran off into the trees again.

Kagome turned her head and grinned up at him. He caught the look and scowled. "What?"

She shrugged as she stood up and her smile widened. "That was really sweet of you."

"Keh."

"Not `keh'!" she argued, leaning into him just a little. The contact shot straight though him. It nearly knocked him over. He moaned softly. She kept talking and didn't hear the sound. "It was sweet! Poor dog looked like it hadn't had a bite to eat in days."

"She'll be fine," he maintained stubbornly as sudden, irrational anger shot to the fore. He had always hated it when Kagome made a fuss over his more unguarded moments. It made him feel weak, as though he was somehow lacking.

"She?" Kagome echoed.

"The dog is female," he explained as bitterness edged aside the anger, and he had to swallow the urge to lash out. He made a face. He shouldn't have to explain any of this to her. She'd spent most all of the last couple of years with him, and no matter how often he reminded himself of late that she wasn't to blame for her memory loss, he also couldn't quite help but feel a little frustrated with her for it. `It wasn't her doing,' his mind whispered. He shoved that thought aside. Her doing or not, couldn't she see that it was going to kill him?

"How do you know?"

InuYasha stopped, hands on hips, as he glared over at the tree line and the white dog cowering in the shadows. "Because," he said, careful to keep his tone even, "I'm half inu-youkai, remember?" He started forward again but halted when Kagome's small hand reached out to stay him.

"Why are you angry?" she asked softly, her eyes probing his for answers.

As quickly as it had come, the anger drained out of him. Staring at her, he reminded himself for the millionth time that, for whatever reason, she really didn't remember, and she wasn't trying to hurt him at all. He reached out and brushed his knuckles against her cheek, relishing the way her eyes drifted closed as he touched her. "I'm not," he assured her.

Kagome opened her eyes and smiled. "Come on. Mama's going to freak if we don't hurry."

He let her take his hand and drag him forward, a slight frown furrowing his brow. The memory of Kagome, catching his tear and making her wish unsettled him . . .

If she only knew . . .


InuY asha grimaced and reigned in the desire to chuck the video game controller across the room. Souta giggled mercilessly, and InuYasha sighed. The youngster was handing him his ass on a platter.

"You stink at this, Inu-no-nii-chan," the boy commented, using the normal form of address to which InuYasha had grown accustomed during their search for the Shikon no Kakera.  When InuYasha had told Souta to drop the 'Izayoi-sensei' thing awhile back, it had felt like the most natural thing in the world, and when he'd heard the words come out of the boy's mouth, it had bolstered his resolve, too.  Now, however, Souta's commentary only served to darken InuYasha's already dangerous glower. He restarted the match, and InuYasha rolled his eyes. His pride couldn't take much more of this, he thought wryly. `If the fighters on the game were real, I could take `em . . .'

After having his rear kicked soundly again, InuYasha set the controller aside and got up to stomp out of the living room. Souta's laughter followed him. Heading for the kitchen with the intent to grab a bottle of water, InuYasha stopped short at the sounds of Kagome and her mother's voices coming from inside. He was about to turn around and walk away when he heard his name. Instead, he stopped to listen.

"How do you feel about InuYasha?" Mrs. Higurashi asked.

Kagome giggled. "He's cute—adorable, in fact."

"Looks are a plus," her mother agreed. "But surely there's more to him than that?"

"There is," Kagome granted then sighed. "I wasn't talking about his looks, though. I mean, he is cute. He fed a stray dog this morning but hated it when I pointed out the sweetness of it."

"Some men are uncomfortable, showing their softer sides."

"Maybe," Kagome agreed slowly. "He really is gentle, though. Sure, he likes to act tough. But I wonder . . . I don't think he's had a very easy life."

"What do you mean?" Mrs. Higurashi asked as she lifted a mug of coffee to her lips. InuYasha could smell the strong drink where he stood and wrinkled his nose.

"Just some things he's said," Kagome remarked. "He's good enough at checkers, though." He grinned at the disgusted tone in her voice. "But he let me win, too."

"He let you win?"

Kagome nodded then shook her head. Her mother looked duly confused. "He moved the checkers so I could win."

"He did, did he?"

Kagome drew a deep breath, her tone nonchalant. InuYasha could tell that it was forced. "Mama . . . have you ever felt like you knew someone, even though you really couldn't? Sometimes I think that I know him better than I know myself, and the weird part is, I think he knows me like that, too."

"What does that mean to you, Kagome?" Mrs. Higurashi asked gently.

Kagome sighed. "I've only known him for two months but it feels like so much longer. I feel like I've known him my whole life. Do you know what I mean?"

Mrs. Higurashi's chuckle was gentle, soothing. The sound of it reminded InuYasha of something vague, something he'd heard a lifetime ago. He frowned in concentration as he tried to remember.

"I know exactly what you mean, dear. It's the same way I felt about your father." She laughed again when her daughter gasped softly. Without seeing her face, InuYasha knew that Kagome was blushing.

The warmth behind Mrs. Higurashi's laughter reminded InuYasha of his mother's soft chuckles. She died when he was so young that he had trouble remembering a lot about her. But her laughter . . . this he remembered. Izayoi hadn't done it often. Still, it was a sound that he would never truly forget.

InuYasha heard a chair scrape against the floor, and he smelled Kagome's scent shift as she stood up. She seemed to engulf his senses leaving his mind reeling. `Get a hold on yourself,' his mind chided. `You're a hanyou. Act like one. Surely a human can't bewitch you so easily.' He sighed. Apparently, this human could.

"I need a bath, Mama, if we're done?"

Mrs. Higurashi caught InuYasha lingering in the doorway and smiled at him. "Certainly, dear. Can I get you something to drink, InuYasha?"

He nodded and stepped back as Kagome brushed past him. She shot him a quick smile before she headed off to gather her things for her bath. He watched her go with a bemused grin. Mrs. Higurashi cleared her throat behind him. He offered her a sheepish smile as he turned to face her once more.

"Come, sit down, InuYasha," Mrs. Higurashi coaxed, setting a bottle of water down on the table in the space Kagome had just vacated. "We should talk."

InuYasha did as she requested, idly twisting the bottle in his hands as he wondered just what it was that Mrs. Higurashi had on her mind. She stared past him at the small white television mounted under the cabinet. The news was on. Talking about the latest in the rash of serial muggings, Mrs. Higurashi's expression grew apprehensive as she shook her head and sighed. But she finally picked up the remote and flicked off the set before turning her attention back on InuYasha. "These muggings worry me," she commented in a neutral tone.

InuYasha nodded in agreement, wondering why the woman didn't just say what was really on her mind. Surely the muggings weren't the real reason she wanted to talk to him. He had a feeling it had something to do with where Kagome had spent the prior night that was on Mrs. Higurashi's mind. "They worry me, too," he agreed, careful to keep his tone as neutral as hers was.

Mrs. Higurashi sighed. "And you know that isn't really why I wanted to talk to you, don't you?"

He shot her a quick glance. To his amazement, she reached over and tweaked his ear. His eyes widened. "You . . . you know."

Mrs. Higurashi glanced around and leaned closer, a mischievous smile adding a youthful sparkle to her dark eyes. "I never forgot, InuYasha."

Shaking his head slowly, InuYasha stared down at his unopened water bottle in confusion. "If you remember, then why doesn't Kagome? What happened?"

His question brought on a heavy sigh. "I don't really know why Kagome's forgotten. But there's more to it than her simply forgetting. Somehow things have been changed. Not only does my daughter not remember the adventure you two shared, it seems as though it never has happened. His gaze shot up to meet Mrs. Higurashi's but he remained silent, waiting for her to continue. "Because of this, Kagome will finish school in a few weeks. She'll finish early. She's always been bright. Because of her birthday, she's always been almost two years ahead of most kids her age. I thought maybe she would need this since I knew . . ." Mrs. Higurashi trailed off and suddenly stood up. She held her hand out to him, and when he hesitantly took hold of it, she tugged till he stood, too. "Why don't you and I go for a walk? There are a few things that I should tell you."

Obediently, he followed Mrs. Higurashi through the house and out the back door. She stopped long enough to tell Souta where they were going. Then she led the way through the shrine courtyard and out the back gate that led into the heart of his forest.

"When I was pregnant with Kagome, her father and I used to take long walks through this forest," Mrs. Higurashi said softly as they ambled through the trees. "Often, when he was at work, I'd walk here for hours, too. I could hear her better out here. I think the trees blocked out the noises of the city."

"Hear who?"

She shook her head and chuckled softly. The sound of it lent InuYasha courage though he didn't understand why it would be so. "I never rightfully knew. At the time, I thought maybe it was Kagome speaking to me, but now I'm not so sure." InuYasha intercepted the meaningful glance Mrs. Higurashi sent him. "I didn't hear her voice right away, you see. I don't think it was until the first time I felt Kagome move that I heard that voice with any sort of clarity, but she told me this story. She asked me to remember it. It was the story of a hanyou named InuYasha, a miko named Kikyou . . . and my daughter."

InuYasha stopped mid-stride and turned to stare at Mrs. Higurashi. "That's impossible."

"Of course it is possible, InuYasha. Your story happened over five hundred years ago. Understand that all of it was already done long before Kagome was born, but she still had a part to play. It was my responsibility to make sure that she was prepared for the task. So you see, I knew you would protect her. I knew you would keep my daughter safe. I knew that you would prevail against Naraku. I knew that Kagome would restore the jewel. It was hers, after all, and I knew . . . I knew how my daughter would feel about you. What I didn't know was what would happen to the two of you after you both fulfilled your destinies."

"Destinies?" he echoed as he sank down on a boulder. He shook his head slowly. "Destiny is something you don't have a choice in, something you can't choose to do. You can't achieve destiny until you die."

Mrs. Higurashi tweaked his ear again. "Your destiny was to protect my daughter, and her destiny was to help you defeat Naraku. You've both done that. The thing is, this voice that spoke to me couldn't tell me what would happen after the quest was over. Kagome came home, and I have no idea what took place that made her forget you or the things you'd accomplished together."

InuYasha swallowed hard, willing himself to tell Mrs. Higurashi what he knew. It was difficult. He cleared his throat a couple of times before he could trust himself to speak. "Kagome wished Kikyou back to life. Kagome purified the jewel by bringing Kikyou back."

A look of complete understanding crossed Mrs. Higurashi's features, and she nodded slowly. "Because she believed this was what you wanted? That makes sense. I don't think there's a thing in this world that Kagome wouldn't have done to make you happy. Something tells me just from you being here that it wasn't something you wanted, after all."

InuYasha shook his head and sighed. "Keh. Fat lot she knows about what I want."

"What do you want?"

He could feel the immediate flush break over his features, and InuYasha stubbornly looked away. "I want Kagome to remember me."

Mrs. Higurashi nodded, and he had a feeling that she understood exactly what he meant. She forced a smile. "I must confess, I was rather shocked that you somehow became a teacher."

He made a face. "That wasn't by choice. That was all cooked up by Shippou, Sesshoumaru, and Kagura before I ever got here."

"Having known you as long as I have, it is hard for me to remember sometimes that you are still very young, InuYasha."

He recognized her teasing for what it was and offered her a half-smile. "Keh."

Mrs. Higurashi laughed again. "How old are you?"

He frowned as he considered her question. The fifty years pinned to the tree didn't count. "Twenty." He made a face. "Almost."

"According the Kagome's friends, you're one of the most popular teachers at the school."

He shifted uncomfortably. He had noticed some discomfiting looks from some of the students in his various physical education classes. He'd ignored them. "I'm just a substitute. I don't think I'm teacher material. Still . . . it ain't so bad."

Mrs. Higurashi considered that. "What is it that you'd like to do then, if not teach?"

InuYasha couldn't answer that. He hadn't really considered it. He'd never thought he'd end up spending the rest of his life on this side of the well, and while they had been searching the jewel shards and hunting Naraku, he hadn't had time to consider such a thing as a future after it was all said and done. "I don't know," he confessed. The only thing he did know was that whatever it was he chose to do, he wanted to do it with Kagome by his side.

Mrs. Higurashi nodded. "Let me know if I can help you with anything at all. I'll be more than happy to, if I can."

InuYasha looked away, embarrassed at Mrs. Higurashi's offer of assistance.

They fell into silence for a few minutes, each of them lost in thoughts of their own. InuYasha, for the most part, tried to imagine doing something with his life in this time that he was still trying to adapt to. Maybe he would ask Kagome what she thought . . .

Mrs. Higurashi's soft voice interrupted his musings. "InuYasha . . . the fact that you're here proves to me how much you love my daughter, but I must ask you to promise me something."

His eyes shifted to the side to lock with Mrs. Higurashi's. The woman looked deathly serious despite the wan smile on her face. "What's that?"

Mrs. Higurashi drew a deep breath and let it out slowly. "I'd like your word that you won't push Kagome into anything that she isn't ready for. If and when she remembers you will be time enough for that."

"You want me to keep my hands off of her, is that it?"

Mrs. Higurashi flinched and blushed but nodded. "Until she remembers you and can make a decision like that based on all the facts, yes, that's exactly what I'm asking."

InuYasha felt the skin on his face grow even warmer. He jerked his head once in a nod. Did Mrs. Higurashi honestly think that he had set out to lure Kagome into his bed?

A warm, fuzzy white head nudged under his hand. InuYasha glanced down at the stray white dog who now sat beside him, staring up at him with a sad expression in the depths of her eyes.

He flinched inwardly as the memory washed over him of waking up this morning with Kagome held securely in his arms. Yet as sweet as that had been, the truth of it all was that, if he was completely honest with himself, he desperately wanted Kagome, but he needed her to remember him even more.

It seemed like a vicious circle, didn't it?  Each thing hinged on the other.  In the end, what would happen if she never remembered?

His ears flattened.  The idea that she may never remember him . . . It tore him apart inside.

A cold, wet nose nudged his hand.  InuYasha scratched the animal's head as the dog beside him whined softly.