InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Race of The Heart ❯ Homecoming Part Two: Memories of the Past ( Chapter 5 )

Homecoming Part 2: Memories of The Past

She sparkled. The light catching the glitter strands of her dress, making her shimmer and shine as she moved. The teenagers in the gym whispered as the couple danced. Kagome heard none of this and she didn't see the pairs of eyes that followed her every move. All she saw was the one who held her in his arms.

I didn't know he could dance.

As Sesshoumaru led her gracefully across the dance floor Kagome looked into his eyes, the golden orbs that fascinated her.

What happened to him? She absently wondered, his eyes were blank and unfocused, as if he was recalling something, replaying a scene from his past in his mind. Something had happened to him, she knew that. Something had made him cold; something had made him unable to laugh, unable to smile.

His hand moved, unconsciously bringing her closer, pressing itself more firmly on the bare skin of her back. Heat radiated from his hand, his fingertips idly caressed her skin, sending pulsing waves of warmth throughout her body. She resisted the urge to close her eyes with the weight of the desire, she resisted the urge to press her body closer to his, she wanted him. But right now, as she looked up to his face once again noticing the faraway look he still held, right now he didn't see her.

Then suddenly the music stopped, she nearly sighed out loud. Dancing with him had been wonderful; it had been beautiful, she was sad to see it end. As she turned to walk away, prepared to enter reality once more, she was stopped as his hand refused to let go of hers.

She brought her startled gaze to his, watching as he snapped back into awareness and focused on her. He looked down at the hand that still held her as if it were foreign to him. Abruptly he let her go and walked away without a word.

Normally she would have stormed after him in anger, yelling at him for being so rude. But in the moment before he turned from her she saw something. A fleeting flash in his eyes, a subtle change in the golden hue, for a second she had seen what he hid so well.

Sorrow and pain.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Sesshoumaru didn't mind the harsh bite of the cold wind. In fact, he preferred it. It helped clear his mind, helped chase away the ghosts that had come back to haunt him.

Stuffing his hands in his pockets, he turned around to take in his surroundings. The track. The only place he felt at home. He had not meant to come here; his feet seemingly had a mind of their own and had brought him here, to the place where everything was so right, the goal so clear, to win.

He hadn't thought about the past in a long time, she had brought it all back, she had made him remember. She had looked beautiful tonight. Dressed in a midnight blue dress that had made her eyes come alive. Gone was the girl in the tank top and shorts sweating from a workout. She had been replaced by a woman of ethereal beauty who moved with a quiet grace.

But sometime in the middle of the dance he shared with Kagome he had drifted off, sometime after looking into the face of the girl who greatly resembled another the past had overtaken him.

That day three years ago had been explosive and painful; the climax to a story that had been building his whole life. That woman of Inu Yasha's…she had merely been the catalyst, she had merely ignited the fire of hate that had been simmering beneath the surface for so long.

He had always been suspicious of the death of his mother; Inu Yasha's furious outburst only confirmed what he had been reluctant to accept. Now there was no doubt, his mother had taken her own life, and left him behind. In a way the lie his father had told him was true, she had died of an incurable illness, an illness that plagued her heart. His mother had lost the love of her life to another woman and that woman had borne a child, Inu Yasha.

Sesshoumaru didn't hate his half-brother personally so much as he hated what he represented. Inu Yasha had been borne from an affair that had killed his mother. How was he supposed to get past that? He couldn't, and he never had.

His mother had been so beautiful, so happy, and so loving. It was no wonder that his ability to love had died with her death. He had seen what love did to people; he had seen what it did to his mother. It brought her torment and pain, it had broken her.

Love was for fairytales and daydreams. It wasn't logical or rational; it had no place in the real world.

He didn't believe in love. It was merely a whimsical fantasy that was always out of reach.

But for a moment, as he recalled his body's reluctance to let go of Kagome at the end of their dance, for moment he wondered if he was wrong.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Kagome stood at the gate, unsure of whether or not she should walk onto the track. He was completely oblivious to his surroundings; he was lost in his own world.

For once he was unguarded, for once he was vulnerable. The raw emotion on his face broke her heart, although she did not know why. Something about the way he stood there, quiet, unmoving, and alone spoke to her and told her that beneath the frozen surface lay a heart that felt, a heart that was bleeding.

Kagome fisted her hands at her side in determination. She would not leave him to face his demons alone as she was sure everyone else did. She walked across the dirt lanes and stepped onto the center field, ignoring the wetness of the grass that froze her feet.

She tentatively reached out to touch him. But in a sudden movement he turned around, as if he finally sensed that he was not alone, and grabbed her wrist before she could touch him.

Surprise flashed briefly in his eyes before his stoic mask fell back into place.

"What are you doing here" he demanded, his hand tightening on her wrist, clearly he did not appreciate her intrusion.

"I followed you out here" Kagome started "you seemed preoccupied when you left the gym; I just wanted to make sure everything was fine." She finished, wondering how he would react to knowing that she was worried about him. Just as the thought ran through her mind Sesshoumaru said

"I am not the one you need to worry about, at least I had enough sense to come out here with a coat."

Kagome looked down at herself and nearly laughed. He was right, she had been too worried about where he was going to grab her coat from the gym, and she was paying for that little oversight. She was shivering and she had to forcefully clench her jaw together to keep her teeth from chattering.

Why did I not notice how cold it was?

Sesshoumaru merely raised an eyebrow at her newest act of stupidity. He let go of her hand and, in one fluid movement, had his jacket off and on her shoulders. It seemed Sesshoumaru was quite the gentleman.

The warmth of his body still heated the jacket and instantly warmed her. It smelled of him, that smoky scent of autumn. She lifted her head, ready to thank him, but he turned away form her and resumed his quiet vigil. Staring off into the distance. So she stood with him, silently letting him know that he was not alone.

They stood that way, neither speaking, neither moving until his soft voice broke the stillness of the night.

"Let's go" was all he said as walked away, leaving her to run after him. She didn't know where they were going until they reached his car and he motioned for her to get in. She climbed in and he drove off in the direction of her house. The silence of the track carried into the car, it was obvious he did not want to talk. Once they reached her house she got out of the car, watching as he sped away the instant her door had closed.

Her gaze lingered until the lights of his car faded and disappeared.

He hadn't told her why he seemed so upset, there was no big confession. But she really hadn't expected it, that wasn't his style. But she knew there was something there, and she was determined to find it.

Kagome stood just outside the door to her house; the cold wind not affecting her, she suddenly realized why she was so warm.

Pulling the lapels of the fabric more tightly around her Kagome smiled into the darkness of the night, she still wore his jacket.

~*~*~*~*~*~*

Inu Yasha watched Sesshoumaru walk into the house from his window, minus his jacket.

Kagome had been with him, he knew that. He had watched her follow him out of the gym after their dance. Losing to his brother had stung his pride, but watching him hold the girl he had asked to the dance had been too much.

She had said no to him. Granted he had not really asked her but still, he was Inu Yasha, every girl wanted him. Every girl it seemed except for Kagome. Pushing himself away from the window, Inu Yasha sat on the bed, his head in hands. Deep down he knew he only wanted Kagome for one reason; he wanted her because of who she resembled.

Her name had been Kikyou. She was beautiful, smart, and everything he dreamed of. But she had betrayed him. He had come home one day to find the love of his life in the arms of his brother.

He hadn't meant to reveal the secret he had discovered in his youth, the secret he had not been meant to know. His anger had blinded him, but it didn't matter. Now they both suffered, they both lived with the unbearable misery.

It had always been a competition between the two brothers, who was better, stronger, and smarter. And it always seemed that Sesshoumaru came out the victor. He had won Kikyou and now it looked as if Kagome would become the next thing Inu Yasha would lose to his brother.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Sesshoumaru threw himself down wearily on the bed. His little trip to the past had been exhausting. Although at the moment that wasn't what he was thinking about.

Kagome. She had been worried about him, the concern in her eyes had been genuine and it had been strong. He couldn't even remember the last time someone had been concerned of his welfare.

She was an enigma, a mystery wrapped in a deceptively innocent and naïve package. She hadn't bombarded him with questions, she hadn't demanded an explanation. She had merely stood there in silence with him, offering comfort in the only way he would accept it.

Her presence had a calming affect on him. Her undemanding nature, her unbearably pleasant scent, flowers and rain, that wafted his way with the shift of the wind, she soothed him.

He had felt a sudden and powerful urge to tell her everything, to lighten the burden he had carried for so long…alone.

But then he had remembered, people don't stay, eventually they would leave, it was inevitable. So he sped away from her as fast as could before the longing of his heart betrayed him.

But his heart was persistent, that night a pair of azure eyes haunted his dreams.

Review Responses:

Sukera: I'm just glad you were able to read it! Thank you!

Sesshyangel: Actually….I think I planned on making it a Ses/Kag fic from the beginning…and yes Sess would make a GREAT runner!

Nankinmai: I know I know…angst is horrible…but I couldn't help it! LOL…seriously the rest of your review is just plain funny!

o7: THANK YOU!!!!

wayfarer-redemption: No need to bow…lol….here's the next chapter!

Divine Discontent: THANK YOU!

drea-chan: I thought the plot needed some thickening…

Sesshoumarus-girl: Well thank you! I truly appreciate it!