InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Realization ❯ Realization ( Chapter 1 )

[ P - Pre-Teen ]

Realization
 
 
Standing under this tree of mine, you're the only thought in my mind. Why did you have to leave? Leave me alone again. I was alone for too long. Such an unwanted familiar feeling. Alone
 
But you won't come back this time, not this time. Gazing at your battered, broken, bleeding body on the blood stained earth. Seeing you tremble in pain. Eyes shut tight in agony. Your blood searing my nose and covering ground around you. I sat there on the ground; fearful to move you, yet wanting more than anything to hold you close. I wanted to help you, to save you. There was no time for help. No way for help. None
 
Your wounds too deep and numerous to be cured. You were strong, but not strong enough. If I had been there just seconds before, I would have taken the blow. You would have been safe. That was my duty. To keep you safe. I failed.
 
I dig my claws into the ancient wood of the goshinboku. Head resting against the great trunk. I let a tear escape my eye. Not caring any more. I would have cared so long ago. To show my weakness and feelings. But you taught me different, and now you're gone. Forever.
 
I remember your last painful words in my arms. Face contorted in pain. "InuYasha, I'm glad your okay." Don't leave me I whimpered, not now. It was too short, the time shared between us. I wanted to be together much longer, I was planning to ask you to be my mate. To have pups of our own. But now you're gone.
 
I look up to the dark night sky. As dark as your hair. My tears falling freely now. My heart clenched in pain. I hope your looking down on me. But I wish you were here with me. I sit with my back to the tree. Remembering you. Your innocent face, your calming voice. You.
 
You depended on me for protection. For a friend. When in danger, my name was the first thing you called. I would come running, ready to slay what ever dared put you in danger. Fueled by your dependence on me, the smell of your fear. Your scent.
 
As I held you in my arms, hoping you would stand and smile saying you were fine and we should get going to find more jewel shards. But you didn't. Trembling in pain. I wanted to take it all away. "Inu Yasha, take the jewel and continue with our journey" she said. No, you'll be with me for the rest of the journey Kagome I whispered. She managed a painful grin. "Inu Yasha I…" and you fell into silence. Your hand limp in mine. Body relaxing. Tears flowing down my cheeks. No you cant. Die
 
Straining my ears for your heartbeat, your breath. But your body was still, blood still flowing from the wound on your chest. You never saw it coming towards you. Naraku's barbed appendage. Passing clean through your chest, leaving poisonous barbs in its place. He fled, grinning "Now I have taken both your women Inu Yasha, Is this more pain than you can endure?" I didn't hear him as I watched you fall to your knees. Eyes wide with shock as you whispered my name. I was too late. Our friends stood aside, in silence as I ran to you. Seeing the damage. Seeing the Blood. Your blood.
 
I will live with that on my conscience forever. I never got to tell you. I love you Kagome. Did you love me? I'll never know, and neither will you.
I stayed with you, long after you slipped into silence, into stillness. I didn't notice our friends had gone back to the village to tell the others. Your body had gone cool and stiff. We never shared a kiss. It was too late for us. I'll miss you. Forever.
 
I carried you back to the village. Our friends prepared you for a burial. I couldn't stand it, couldn't stay. Please don't think me a coward for not helping. I stayed by your grave for days. Crying and praying that you were happy which I will never be. The gods have taken two women from me now. They gave you to me and then took you away. Am I meant to walk this earth alone forever? Is this. Punishment?
 
Now I sit here against the old tree where we first met so long ago. You thought I hated you from the beginning. But from the moment I saw you pressed against me when I was still pinned to here, you took hold of my heart. I never got to show you my true emotions for you. Will you ever give me my heart back? Release me from this pain. Please
 
I whisper your name as I stare into the darkness of the forest. The wind blows my hair across my face. I speak your name louder. Then you step out from the darkness. "Inu Yasha, why are you crying? I'm fine, don't worry" you smile. I blink in disbelief, but as I open my eyes, you're gone.
Kagome! I shout. She came back to tell me that, I thought. Thank you, I whisper to the wind. My heart somewhat lighter for the first time since you lay in my arms, dying. My heart is longing to join you in Nirvana. I contemplate to kill myself, but first I must continue with our journey, you're last dying wish. To me.
 
I lay my head against the ancient wood. Remembering all the things about you. The things we did together. My heart beats faster as I remember the first time spying on you as you bathed in the river. The gentle curves of your bare body. You knew I was there, watching from the branches. Yet sometimes you said nothing, watching from the corner of your eye. A gentle smile tugging at the corner of your mouth.
The way you blushed. How you took time to explain things to me, sometimes I pretended to not understand just to see the frustration on your face and sometimes paying for it with a "sit". I loved to tease you, if only to see the expressions of your face.
But I'll miss you. The rhythm of your heartbeat I'll never again hear, the scent of your feelings I'll never smell again, you're innocent face I'll never see again. More tears spill from my eyes, down my face. I drift into sleep, dreams filled about you only. Only you.
 
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Inu Yasha awoke in his tree, awoken by a warm tear sliding down his cheek. He looked down at all his friends' spread around the fire sleeping beneath him. As quiet as he could, he jumped down and walked over to Kagome lying on her back. He laid down beside her, put one arm over her chest and just listened to her heartbeat, and breathed in her scent.
 
Kagome cracked an eye open just a bit. Some near by movement had awoken her. It hadn't come from the sleeping kitsune who had rolled an arm's length away in his sleep. Then she noticed pressure on her chest that wasn't from her own arms. She opened both her eyes and rolled away from the fire onto her side to come face-to-face with Inu Yasha.
 
He moved closer placing a passionate kiss on her lips. He heard her heartbeat break into a gallop at his sudden action. And was pleased when she relaxed into the kiss. He drew her in against his body.
 
They broke apart, just staring at each other; eye's glazed with passion. "Inu Yasha" Kagome whispered. "Kagome, I love you" he whispered back. Kagome was wondering if this was another one of her dreams, but figured it was a little too real to be a dream. Inu Yasha was actually confessing his love for her. She wondered what had brought him to do so, especially in the middle of the night.
 
"Kagome? Do you mind if I stay here tonight?" She snapped out of her stupor at his words. She could only nod yes. She slid over on her sleeping bag, being to warm a night to sleep inside, to give Inu Yasha more room next to her. He lay on his back as Kagome nuzzled into his shoulder, his arm wrapped under her. He slept hard that night, completely content with Kagome. Wishing the night would never end. He would protect her forever.
 
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Well? Tada! This is started off as one of my dark fanfics, due to a very bad day at school. But I made it a happy ending the next day. And sorry it's so short, its my second shortest. I have many ongoing fics that are like at least 10 times longer if you add up all the chapters.
 
TTYL,
Gothic hanyou