InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Remember Forever ❯ Chapter 1

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

Remember Forever
Summary: Letting go is always hard, but no one ever thought it was this hard.
Monologue Kagome's POV
Lyrics : Remember Forever by Me.
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<Cry for me a river of gold
And remember, you promised to tell me
the tales of old { do you remember?)>

I walked through the calming night sky in feudal Japan.
It was always so beautiful at night. The stars shone so bright that I almost regret what I am about to do.
So I continue walking trying to put my mind at ease, but to no avail. My mind wanders back to days so long ago.

I remember all the wonderous adventures we had.
But, like I said before, those were back in the good ol' days. The days when InuYasha loved me and not Kikyo. The days when Miroku was a pervert and Sango constantly smacked him with the Hiraikotsu. I miss those days. But on a better note, Sango and Miroku admitted their feelings and have allready gotten married and had their first child. A young boy they, of course, named Kohaku- after her brother. I wonder if they'll miss me when I leave. I wonder if they've missed me now that I haven't been there for a few weeks. I some-what doubt it.

<remember me.
And when I'm dead and gone>

I'm walking through InuYasha's forest right now.
So many memories flood my mind. I can still see InuYasha pinned to the tree. He was so kawaii. Maybe I should have left him there.....NO I mentally slap myself for that.
Hmmmm I wonder how Shippoe-chan is.
Shippoe went off with Lord Sesshomaru so he could be with Rin. Jaken was killed a few years ago trying to protect Rin. Tensaiga couldn't retreive his soul. Rin was shattered saying it was all her fault. It really wasn't.
And once again my mind floods back to InuYasha. I remember when he would hold me in his arms when neither of us could sleep and we would watch the sun rise.

<Remember me
at the break of dawn (Please remember)>

I clasp the Shikon No Tama in my fist.
This tiny pink orb was the reason for all our heartaches.
Mine, Sango's, Miroku's, Shippoe's and especially InuYasha's. InuYasha.....I wonder how he will react when I tell him the news. He probably won't mind as much.
'One less nuisance' he'll say. I guarantee it.
Gods why do I have to love him.
I remember when I told him I loved him...

<All our laughs
all our cries
And I could see everything.
But only in your eyes
Could I remember
Forever.>
*************Flash Back*******************
Spring time in the past was amazing.
Roses and Daffodils everywhere. I could never have been happier. Neither could InuYasha. For once he was smiling. A true smile. One that held happiness, laughter and many other joyful emotions. I was happy that he was happy. Today. I decided to tell him today that I loved him and no matter how much it cost me, I would do anything to make sure he was happy.
That may just be my death but I love him that much.
But I'm going to wait until nighttime to tell him.
So now we just continue walking. I can't say all of us because Sango and Miroku have left. They traveled to Sango's village to fix the graves and the Hiraikotsu. Or so that was their story. I believe they just wanted some alone time considering they began dating some time around last year. I was so thrilled for them. That left Shippoe, who stayed with Keada to cure ailing villagers.
Now it was just me and InuYasha. He was alot more open when it was just us. I loved it. I mean ,of course, I enjoyed when the others were around, but I adored it when we were alone. Expecially tonight when I would tell him I love him.

<Tell me, do you believe
in another world?
Where there is fantasy? ( do you believe?)>

Luckily night came sooner then I thought.
I asked him to accompany me into the forest to lay under the stars as we always had.
He agreed and we walked into the forest.
We stopped when we reached our destinantion.
It was by the lake. The stars filled the neverending night sky. The wind was humming a soft melody as the crickets played along in perfect harmony. There was only one word to describe the scenery, Perfect. Perfect, just like InuYasha. The world might see him as a lowly mongrel, but not me. I see him as 'my knight in shinning armor' though the armor is a fire red haori and hamaka, and the knight has long silvery hair and golden eyes. But all the same, I still could simply melt whenever he looks at me.
"So, what was it you wanted to talk about Kagome?"
I sighed. It's now or never.
"InuYasha I just wanted to tell you......" I couldn't even begin to tell him...... I freaked. I begin panicking by taking to many deep breaths.
"Uhhh...... Kagome... are you ok?"
"Huh..... yea..... Gomen nasai, I just was trying to tell you I loved you and I had a melt down." and then it hit me.... I had just told him, and by accident, that I loved him....
Omigosh I'm freaking out again. My face is flushed beyond all comprehension and my breathing is rigged.
InuYasha is just looking at me like I'm repulsive... or an idiot.
More along the lines of both. He did the one thing I never expected. He began laughing. Not cracking up but full on laughing to the point where he couldn't breathe.
I stand in shock.... and frankly I'm pissed.
"Grrr..... InuYasha what's so funny!!!???"
"I'm sorry..... you just ..... look so .....cute and stupid......"
He complimented and insulted me all in one. I rolled my eyes as he finally calmed down and pulled me into a loving embrace.
"I love you too, Kagome" he whispered huskily into my ear.
It sent shivers up and down my spine.

<And true love go untouched
by the cruelness of reality.
Do you believe? (Oh please tell me)>
**************End Flash Back********************

Ever since then we were inseparable.
I loved every minute of it. Even with all the pain I have now, I wouldn't trade those memories for the world.
Yet now that I think about it, the words I once doubted worked for everything, actual work in anything.
For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction.
That law is absolute, in everything. For every moment of happiness there is a moment of pain. For every love, there is heart ache. And everytime I cry, Kikyo laughs. This must mean she laughs a whole lot more now. (I can't even imagine her giggling or smiling, much less laughing.)
But though I do not regret falling in love, I regret letting my heart get the best of me. And that is just what it did.
But no matter how many times I tell myself it didn't happen ,it doesn't change the fact that it did.
I resent them both for that. I resent Kikyo for tempting, and InuYasha for giving in. I loved him and he goes and screws everything up. Sadly I can remember that day very, very clearly. I wish I couldn't. But then again, that doesn't mean anything. I wished every night ,from that day on, that I wouldn't wake in the morning, that I would simply die or cease to exist. I even wished, that though the world would continue turning, mine would stop.
But since you don't know what happend I'll explain.
************************Flash Back***********************

<Promise me,
You'll stay forever by my side
And you'll never leave.
And when I'm dead and gone,
(Remember me)
And all the nights we stayed up till dawn
(Remember Please)>

InuYasha had asked me to meet him in the forest next to the lake. The same place we began our relationship.
I was thrilled. But I apparently didn't understand what he meant by 'We have something important to discuss'.
He said it so coldly, that I was almost frightend.
Frightend by his cold tone, frightend by the disgusting resentment in his eyes, and frightend that ,when I reached the lake and saw him and Kikyo, I wanted to die.
I had never wanted to die before, never to the point of suicide. I saw him, holding her, the way he had held me.
I saw him kissing her, the very way he'd kissed me.
And I saw him promising her forever, the same promise he'd made to me. I almost broke down. Tears flowed to the point where I couldn't see. InuYasha knew I was there.
He had noticed my presence well before he kissed that welp. Though I tried to block everything out, I still heard them talking.
"InuYasha, rid us of that welp please" she said in her traditional monotone voice.
"InuYasha....how could you??" I cried as I ran to the well.
*****************End Flash Back******************************

<When this battle ends
And when our time runs out
Promise me, you won't forget
What this was all about.>

I reach the hut and walk in. Kikyo is sitting in there, in InuYasha's arms. Neither budged. I knew InuYasha didn't care if I had found out.
"Sango, Miroku and Kohaku just left, Kagome. You can probably catch them if you wish"
"Arigotu Keada. But I have un-finished business with InuYasha" I say as cheerfully as possible.
"Allright child" she says before exiting the small hut.
After a moment of silence, InuYasha spoke
"So, what was it you wanted to talk about Kagome?"
He used the same voice and question...... I was somewhat shocked.
"Ummm can Kikyo leave" I say pointing to her and then to the door.
"InuYasha ...." she says.
"Go"
"What??"
"You heard me.... Go" he snapped.
Kikyo left.... thank goodness.
"Here." I say simply.
"What.... why are you giving me the Shikon jewel?"
"I don't need it"
"So you're staying here?" he looked almost hopeful.
"No" I made sure my face showed no emotion.
"You're staying in your era."
"No"
"What???"
"I'm not 'staying' anywhere. The jewel in yours so take it.
I have no more business with you."
"Where are you going?"
"Doesn't matter"
"To me it does. I want you safe."
"You obviously didn't care that much when you were with Kikyo"
"Kagome....." he was shocked.
"No InuYasha. It's over. Done. There is nothing you can do about that. Now, take the jewel and let well enough be."
InuYasha looked shocked and upset.
"Kagome, what's wrong with you?"
"Reality" I said cruely ,but rightfully, as I left the hut.
0o0o0

I reached the cliff. The solace calm of the moonless night made everything perfect.
The reason, you ask? Simple. The moonless night for the fact that no one will actually notice I wasn't there like many never noticed the new moon. The calm of night for the thought that I had finally given up all hope and my mind was somewhat at ease.
But at the cliff, I always found myself sitting at the edge. Well atleast I did recently. I would sit here for hours at a time.... or until InuYasha decided to come 'rescue' me. How idiotic could one person be?
But some how, I know he isn't coming this time.
So I sit by the cliff, dangling my legs over the edge, and wait. I have no clue what I'm waiting for, but I'm waiting.
Wonderful. This reminds me of the times we would sneak away from camp and come out and lie under the stars.
I remember one night imparticular when you promised me forever. You told me you would never leave me and you would always love me. So tell me this, what happend? Forever sure seemed short, didn't it?
Tears are now pouring down my cheeks like a flood from the sky. I don't bother to wipe them away, it won't matter in a few minutes any way.

<Promise me you'll remember,
How the stars shone bright in our neverending night.
And how in your arms, everything was just right.
Promise me you'll never forget that night.>

I contemplate how things could have been, but only to realize, this situation was inevitable. I know what I have to do and I start to have second thoughts. But I can't let that hold me back. I have to finish it. I stand up and realize I am so close to the edge that I could simply fall over.
Fall..... thats all I have to do, fall over the edge.
I keep leading myself to believe that he is going to magically appear and tell me it was stupid and not to do it. But I'm wrong, this is no fairy tale, and this certainly is no dream come true. So I do the one thing I know I'm supposed to I jump. I feel the cold November air engulf my body as I fall into the black abyss of night. The sensation is that of flying, as if nothing could harm you.
But the harm will come soon as I hit the cold ground.
And I did hit the ground, hard. Some how I was hoping InuYasha would pop out of nowhere and save me, but he didn't. I felt my body slam agaisnt the frozen ground.
My blood surrounded me. I was shocked I didn't die immediately, but fate wanted me to suffer one last time.
My body went numb, and I felt myself slowly slip away.
My thoughts go to InuYasha one last time. Maybe he would forget about me, maybe they would one day go walking and stumble upon my decayed form.
Maybe he won't look for me, not like he cared.
I just hope he remembers the forever he promised.

<Promise me
you'll remember.
Remember Forever.>