InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Revelation, Realization & Redemption ❯ chapter 11 ( Chapter 11 )

 

Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha or any of its characters they are the property of Rumiko Takahashi. This story was written for the purposes of entertainment and I by no means will profit from the story other than the satisfaction of exercising my imagination and writing abilities.

 

Chapter 11: Answers: More Questions

 

 

Sesshomaru watched the young miko's face as she slept. It was the first time in days that she seemed to be at peace. The last few nights had left him wondering what was troubling the young woman. Many times he had found himself on the verge of waking her to make her tell him what troubled her sleep. He doubted that she would tell him. Besides, the taiyoukai didn't want Kagome to know that he checked in on her each night. The miko might think that he held some sort of affection for her. He didn't himself care to think about what it might mean as well. There was no need to complicate matters with emotions. Inuyasha had done enough of that already. Sesshomaru was certain that baka had a hand in whatever it was that had been troubling the young miko.

 

Tomorrow would be his opportunity to assess her progress and her true state of mind. Hopefully whatever emotional upheaval she had been feeling was not affecting her progress. Kagome was strong spiritually. This fact he did not doubt. As if to reaffirm his thoughts he closed his eyes to feel the power radiating from her as she slept. The feel of her power brought to his mind memories of the battle he witnessed the previous day.

 

The familiar energy of the shards had led Sesshomaru to the demon. He arrived in time to see Kagome erect a spirit barrier around the demon's original targets, Rin and Shippo. The youngsters were playing in a field oblivious to the danger that was coming towards them. The others had come running as soon as they felt its presence. Inuyasha arrived seconds after Kagome had erected the barrier. The demon switched it's attention to the hanyou who now stood between him and his prize. The foolish beast thought the hapless hanyou was the real threat. Before either of them could move, Kagome had conjured the shards from the demon, effectively reducing its energy levels. Before the monk could raise his staff Kagome had sent a tiny amount of energy with the flick of her index finger straight at the demon. The beast screamed as it was blasted into oblivion. Inuyasha, Sango and Miroku had been amazed at how quickly it was over. The children continued to play, never realizing what mortal danger they had been in.

 

The young woman's reaction to his brother after the battle did not escape his notice either. The hanyou truly had the ability to bring out the best and the worst in this particular human. Leaving her here in his care had been a risky venture. Sesshomaru had known this when he left her. Hopefully the decision to leave her in the care of her friends had been the right one. The taiyoukai was counting on her feelings for them to give her powers strength. During the battle she had seemed focused enough, tomorrow he would know for sure. He hoped what he had witnessed afterwards wouldn't have any adverse effect on her progress. They were running out of time.

 

Sesshomaru knew he had much to accomplish in the coming days. There was much to be done if they were to succeed. He sighed, tomorrow would be the last time he could see the young girl for a while. The taiyoukai chose to ignore the niggling feeling in his heart that this thought had caused.

 

Mentally chastising himself for allowing his focus to wander he thought of what still had to be done. There was much to do and little time, he would deal with these feelings later. They needed to finish this before he even thought about the miko in any way other than how to help her develop her powers. Her time here was short anyways. She was from a different world, a different time. Her future and her destiny lay elsewhere. The souls she possessed had been reincarnated in a future time for a reason. The battle may be here, but he had lived long enough to realize that everything happened for a reason. Her time of birth had been no accident. That was something that he had to accept and take care not to forget.

 

When Kagome woke up that morning she was surprised at how calm she felt. The nervous anxiety she had felt the past week was gone. It never failed to amaze her that the anticipation of something was far worse than the event itself. She had spoken to Inuyasha last night, and had finally come to terms with something that had bothered her for so long. Today there was no residual aftermath of the emotions that had plagued her.

 

She had slept in and she noticed that the others were already eating. Besides, it had been too good of a dream to leave. For the first time there was no guilt, just a certainty of where her true feelings lay. Oddly enough she knew that she owed some of this clarity to Sesshomaru's advice. Kagome knew that he had been right in his assertion that she was only here temporarily. That fact had been so easy to forget as the weeks turned into months, and the months turned into years. It had been only too easy to lose sight of that fact.

 

If the gods had wanted her in this time then she would have been born here, or it would have been easy for her to give up the responsibilities she had. It wasn't as if the thought hadn't crossed her mind. Miroku had asked her about it on occasion and she couldn't give him an answer. Now she knew her heart held her there. Her future was there, that is where she belonged. She couldn't help but feel that is where her true destiny lay. When this was over, she would be different, stronger, and she would need it for what lay ahead, in her time.

 

She shook herself from her thoughts and began to pack up her things. This afternoon she would be heading back home. Her mother's birthday was the day after tomorrow, homework to hand in and most importantly her 6th week evaluation tests to take for her study credit. Thank Kami for Independent Study programs, and for Souta's finding out about it.

 

Sesshomaru arrived at their camp, alone. Jaken had been sent as a messenger to Lord Hikari Mamaru in the north. Lord Hikari was an Ice Demon who Sesshomaru trusted implicitly. His help would be essential in bringing the other taiyoukai to the battle when the time came. Secrecy at this time was of the utmost importance. There was no room for error at this stage of the game, and Jaken was the only one of his servants he trusted with this task. The imp may have had faults of character but loyalty and discretion were not among those faults.

 

“Sesshomaru!!!” Rin's happy voice called out as the little girl launched herself into him throwing her arms around his knees. He could not help but feel the warmth of her welcome. Without thinking the great demon lord stooped down and picked her up in a fatherly hug. Rin squealed in delight at the novel attention, and Sesshomaru's heart filled with some emotion at holding the young girl in his arms. It wasn't until she had wrapped her arms around his legs that he realized how much he missed her. He also knew that this was out of character for him to act in such a way.

 

Sesshomaru had witnessed the care and affection the girl had received from both the miko and the taijiya. Humans needed that affection to survive to grow. He had treated the young human as he would have a demon pup. This had given the young girl discipline that many humans lacked, but he knew she needed more than that. Sesshomaru knew he was unable and unwilling to provide that much needed affection. Staying with these humans would be the best for her. The miko would lay down her life to protect the young ones. There could be no greater sign of love than that.

 

Kagome had heard the young girl cry out his name and she looked up to see Sesshomaru holding the little girl in his arms. To say she was surprised to see him show such open affection would be an understatement. Instinctively she knew the taiyoukai wouldn't want her watching their reunion so she turned her back on them and continued her packing. She was also certain that if he had thought anyone else could have seen he never would have picked the girl up. He and Inuyasha definitely had some emotional hang-ups and were more alike in some respects than either of them would care to admit.

 

“Are you ready to show me what you've done all week?” his voice startled her from her thoughts. She had thought he would still be with Rin. The young girl had been asking a lot about him of late and she was not quite sure when he would show up again. She glanced around quickly and saw that Rin was already off with Shippo pulling Sango off in the direction of the hot spring.

 

“Sure.” Was the only reply he received. Suddenly he was struck by the difference in her greeting and Rin's. Something inside of him wondered if there would ever be a day when she missed him as Rin did. If she would ever welcome him back as did the young girl. He was startled by these thoughts so he put them from his mind.

 

Sesshomaru was impressed with the progress that Kagome had made during the week. Her concealing sutra had worked well, as did the other charms she had learned. He was even surprised that she had learned some defensive moves from the taijiya. In short the human had progressed further than even he had hoped possible. Satisfied that his decision to leave her with her friends was correct he went into the lessons of the day, teaching her how to shield her thoughts and emotions from detection. He was even able to teach her some new meditation techniques that would help her strengthen her ability to focus. This would give her better control of her powers. Eventually the young woman wouldn't even have to think about summoning her powers, they would come to her naturally just like breathing. If a demon similar to the one that attacked the other day were to challenge her she would have already dispatched it by the time the others even sensed its being there. That is if they were able to sense it at all.

 

 

“Well done miko.” Was all the taiyoukai said when they were finished for the day.

 

Sesshomaru moved to leave her. He had been careful to keep his feelings to himself. Unwilling to let the miko know how far along she truly was. He didn't want to run the risk of her becoming overly confident. Her skills had improved significantly over the past week. But she was nowhere near ready to face a demon of Naraku's caliber, let alone the demon himself. There were demons just as strong as and stronger than he, but what made him dangerous was he lived only to succeed. The hanyou knew nothing of honor or did he respect the warrior's code, as he used any means necessary to win. That alone made him a formidable opponent. He could not allow her to think herself ready to face him.

 

“Sesshomaru, please, will you stay. I have some questions.” Kagome ventured her voice calm; devoid of the anxiety she had felt.

 

Sesshomaru stopped then and turned to face her. His schooled features gave away none of his feelings. He had hoped to delay this until later. The demon knew he would answer her questions. It was her destiny to fight for the shards. When this started he had vowed to answer whatever she asked of him, she had a right to know what he knew. But he would answer only what she asked and no more. “What would you like to know?” his voice was detached and cool as he faced the young woman

 

“You said I possessed another miko's soul. I was wondering if you could tell me whose.” Kagome figured the best way to get any answers from him was to be straightforward. Experience had shown her that Sesshomaru was honest and direct when confronted. His pride and ethics prevented him from being anything but truthful.

 

“In addition to the priestess Kikyo's soul you possess the soul of the priestess Midoriko.” He stated simply. He doubted she would recognize the significance of this information. Few demons knew the true origins of the shard, and he suspected that even fewer humans, if any did.

 

He was too stunned to hide his expression of surprise when she said aloud, “I thought that her soul was sealed within the jewel. How is this possible…unless…” she looked at him then as if for confirmation of her suspicions. For once the seemingly omniscient demon was at a loss as to what her thoughts may be. It was evident he could tell she had stumbled upon something that was very significant, an epiphany of sorts. But what surprised her is that it appeared that Sesshomaru actually looked surprised. His amber eyes were full of eager interest and he had arched an elegant silver brow in question silently urging her to continue.

 

Kagome took the hint and continued with her train of thought. “Somehow, when the jewel was part of my body, part of her soul was able to merge with Kikyo's. Maybe the energy, the new energy you feel from me was because of their bonding. That would explain everything.”

 

Sesshomaru looked at her, stunned. The Shikon No Tama had been inside this girl. How had he missed that piece of information? Of course, he remembered it now. He had heard that the jewel was burned with Kikyo's body. He wondered if that had been the catalyst. No. He was certain it wasn't. There was something more to this. Something simple he was overlooking, but he was still at a loss.

 

“You didn't know that did you?” Kagome stated more than asked. The look on Sesshomaru's face had told her everything. It was the first time he had truly let his mask slip. She was certain there wasn't much that this demon didn't know. So she told him the story of how she had come to this world, and what had happened with Madam Centipede. When she finished she remembered something, “Sesshomaru, you thought Inuyasha possessed Midoriko's soul, why?”

 

“I knew he had been in contact with the jewel. I thought that maybe when Kikyo sealed him to with the arrow, she may have used the jewel in the process. That would have accounted for it only being a part of the soul that was allowed to escape.”

 

“Many people have come into contact with the jewel other than Inuyasha and me. If anything Kikyo's soul would have bonded with Midoriko's sooner. Wouldn't that have been more likely than Inuyasha's soul bonding with it?”

 

 

“No.” he stated simply. The human was too clever. She looked at him expectantly those midnight eyes of hers filled with curiosity. Sesshomaru knew she waited for him to continue. She knew there was more to this than he was saying. “In fact I really can't explain why you, other than the unknown power you possess. That is one thing I have yet to identify.”

 

“You can explain why you thought Inuyasha's soul could though.” Kagome said patiently.

 

“Midoriko's soul, in a situation as it is in should only be able to bond to a blood relative.” he replied careful to keep his astonishment in check as he replied to her. He need not have worried. Kagome was far from suspecting how much of an impression she was truly making on the demon lord. It was a rare demon that he could hold an intelligent conversation with. Let alone one who could connect facts and catch on to what he was trying to avoid saying and have the audacity to question him about it. Never would he have suspected the intuition that this young woman held. Nor would he have thought how much he would truly enjoy talking to her.

 

“Inuyasha's related to Midoriko? Why didn't he say anything when we were at the cave?” Kagome's brow knitted in confusion. This was said more to herself than to him as she tried to place more pieces of this puzzle together.

 

“He doesn't know. He believes Katsume was his mother. I guess in many ways she was. In truth Katsume was Inuyasha's aunt, but we led everyone to believe she was Inuyasha's mother.” His voice was still calm and emotionless then, but she felt something from him. Distaste? Was that it? Something inside her just knew that he did not like deception. Though he may not be above using it, she knew with a certainty he preferred honesty.

 

“You didn't agree with your father about that.” Kagome stated the fact as if she had known all along.

 

“No I didn't.” Sesshomaru conceded. “Father thought it best. Inuyasha's life was already endangered. Our father was a great demon. Many were loyal to him, and just as many were jealous and would do whatever they could to hurt him. It could not be known that my father had sired a son with Midoriko. Too many demons despised her. There would have been treason and chaos in our midst.

 

As it was there was much talk about Katsume, and there were many attempts on her life. Many demons died trying to bring her and Inuyasha to an end. Eventually my father sent them away, hoping to hide them amongst the humans. Eventually the villagers found out about Inuyasha's heritage. He and Katsume were shunned and despised. Katsume was killed one night while trying to protect Inuyasha from a demon attack. Father was able to reach them in time before Inuyasha was killed.

 

Father needn't have bothered, because even at a young age Inuyasha's powers were great. Before he came of age Midoriko's miko blood ensured his safety. He would have been immune to the attacks of lesser demons. It would take a great taiyoukai such as my father or I to harm him. If they had just told the truth things may have been different.”

 

There was something like sadness hidden in the calm tones of his voice. She felt it in her soul just as she had the distaste earlier. She realized something then. He wanted Inuyasha to live. How many opportunities did he have to kill Inuyasha? Her mind boggled at the thought. It would have been so easy after his father's death. He had the power but yet he allowed Inuyasha to get the tetsusiaga. Funny Inuyasha hadn't even known about the tetsusiaga until Sesshomaru had shown up looking for it. In that instant she realized something, something important and couldn't help herself.

 

“You led Inuyasha to tetsusiaga didn't you? He would never have found it on his own. You knew he needed it or his youkai blood would get out of control. You knew that the miko powers in his blood could only keep him alive for so long before he would need the sword's protection.” She said suddenly.

 

He was stunned. Emotionless amber eyes looked at her then as if he was just seeing her for the first time. How she had realized the truth he could only guess. Rarely had he been taken by surprise. And now he had been twice in a matter of moments by a human. And he wasn't quite sure what he thought of it. So he decided to concede the point.

 

“Yes. I did not quite like the lengths that I had to go through to get him to take the sword in the first place. My brother always was very stubborn. I had thought that the fact that I was searching for it would have been enough to pique his interest. Unfortunately he needed greater persuasion. Jaken actually came up with most of that plan. I was just thankful that it worked, though I would have rather forgone it entirely. My father wouldn't have wanted Inuyasha to have been hurt.”

 

“It's more than that.” Kagome said as she eyed him closely. She had seen the glimmer of something in his amber eyes. If she wasn't mistaken she was sure that he cared very deeply about his younger brother.

 

“This is enough for one day. I expect you to speak of Inuyasha's true parentage to no one. My father did not want it known.” He said crisply. Concerned that he had revealed too much Sesshomaru needed to put an end to this conversation. He didn't need the miko looking into his motives or prying into past history about his brother. Inuyasha was already a constant reminder of how he had failed. Then as he remembered himself the mask was back on. His voice was once again cool and uninflected as he said “I'm impressed miko. You have gleaned more information from me in the course of a single conversation than any spy could in week of torturing me. I think it is only fair that you tell me something that I wish to know.”

 

“Anything” Kagome replied. Her midnight eyes bright with a feeling of pride, Sesshomaru had given her what she was sure for him was a compliment. His voice may not have carried any emotion, but the fact that he had said it was enough. As long as she had known him Sesshomaru had never said something that he did not mean. Kagome could not help but feel a small victory. She knew she had made an impression on this demon lord who made every effort to avoid feeling and she could only wonder at his control.

 

“What did my brother do to make you cry?” Amber met midnight then and was glad to see the surprise held in them. The tables had been turned.

 

“Who told you that he made me cry?” she asked curious. How could he possibly have known that something had happened? She had hoped to have had this escape his knowledge. She was certain if he knew what happened he wouldn't allow her to stay with her friends. Even with her powers increasing with strength and training Kagome very much doubted that she would be much of a match for the formidable demon before her.

 

“No one told me. I smelt the salt of your tears earlier. From what I've seen of your past interactions with Inuyasha I deduced that they were for him.” His voice was calm and even as he looked into her midnight eyes to ascertain her feelings.

 

“He apologized. It's over.” Was the only answer he received from the miko, and her eyes still showed surprise, but a little annoyance at being questioned. He smiled inwardly. He was getting into her soul just as she was trying to get into his. That was the only fair thing to do.

 

He raised a silver brow in disbelief but that was the only emotion he allowed to show outwardly. “You are no longer in love with him then.”

 

“I will always love your brother.” Kagome admitted. What could it hurt to confide in him? After all it had been his advice that had helped her to begin to realize the truth about her feelings. The fact that he was asking her about it spoke of his concern even if he did try to hide behind a wall of indifference. Her midnight eyes shone with wisdom as she continued, “But it's not like you think. There are so many types of love. I'm not quite sure which one I feel for him. But I do know for certain that it's not the type of love I would feel for the man that I'm going to marry. I love him. I trust him with my life. Just as he trusts me with his own. There's so much we've been through, and I've lost count of the number of times he has saved my life. I can't turn my back on that, not now, not ever. We argue and fight, that's true, but there's a bond between us. I know it's as deep and binding as any love could be, as anyone could ever hope for. I know he loves Kikyo and he always will, but that doesn't mean there's no place for me. He's proven that time and again. I know that no matter what I'll always be a part of him as well.”

 

“The warriors bond” Sesshomaru stated simply. Amber eyes showed no sign of the interest he was beginning to feel for this woman who now appeared to be wise beyond her years. “I have seen it before.”

 

“I hadn't realized it had a name. I guess I hadn't seen much, I had confused it for a different kind of love. Last night we finally cleared the air between us, and I was able to realize what my feelings for your brother really are. I didn't realize how much of a relief it would be to finally do so.” Sesshomaru ignored the feeling of relief he felt at these words. He told himself it was because the hanyou couldn't harm her if she didn't love him.

 

“So Kikyo had nothing to do with this, my brother is showing some signs of intelligence then.” Sesshomaru stated to himself more than to Kagome.

 

“She did.” The miko however did not realize his distraction and thought the question was meant for her to answer. Amber eyes still held midnight ones captive, looking deep into her very soul. Kagome felt impelled to confirm his suspicion. Something in her told her to tell him everything. That it would be important to establish trust with him. And not telling him would undermine that. Now was the time to lay everything open, if she had learned anything last night she had learned the importance of facing her fears. Her embarrassment at having to admit something so personal made her break eye contact.

 

“I overheard Inuyasha and Kikyo talking that first night I put up the shield. I figured that since we each have a part of the soul that's how she got through without noticing that it was up. I heard him tell her that he only cared for me because I reminded him of her. That's what truly started all this. Then I wanted to prove that I wasn't a weak human. To show everyone that I could put my emotions to the side and do what I was supposed to. I just wanted everyone to know I'm me, I'm more than just the reincarnation of someone else.”

 

`Inuyasha truly is a baka.' Sesshomaru thought to himself as he looked at the girl before him, eyes lowered in what he could only attribute to embarrassment at having to say it aloud. His cool appearance did not give any indication of the anger he felt towards his younger brother or the sympathy he felt for the woman before him at the moment. Knowing that Kagome had forgiven his brother was the only thing that kept his emotions in check. The miko's heart was at ease, the tone of her voice told him that. That was all that mattered. To react in anyway would be a waste of time and too much time had been lost already.

 

Midnight eyes locked with amber once more, and he saw in their blue depths what she did not want him to see, what she had been so careful not to let into the tones of her voice. The vulnerability that still lingered within her heart and the self doubt that she still had about her true identity was there for him to see. Something lurched inside of him compelling him to push those thoughts from her once and for all. He had to say something to make her understand.

 

Amber softened then to liquid gold softening the lines of the hardened youkai's face. When he spoke, his voice was foreign to even his ears. The usual calm tones came out in little more than a husky growl, the words whispered in a voice that possessed a tender intensity that surely could not be his. “Miko, Kagome, I have been alive longer than I could care to know. I have yet to meet anyone like you, human or demon. Do not believe that you are nothing but a reincarnation. You are so much more than that. If you are to survive this you must believe me.”

 

The moment was gone just as instantly as it came. His face once again devoid of any of the feeling she had barely glimpsed. Kagome was sure she had imagined it. That voice, its tone the way it touched her soul and made her pulse race. She cast a sideways glance at him again just to see. He was still the Sesshomaru she had known so well, stoic and emotionless. She forced it from her mind. It must have been her imagination. Maybe she was a little more disturbed than she had originally thought last night. Pushing the thoughts from her head she walked back to where the others were waiting. She should be heading back home anyways. It would be safer to think about this from a distance. And what could be more distant than 500 years in the future.

 

Revised, edited, and reposted 9/07/04

Author's Notes: Currently I am in the process of revising, editing and reposting this fic.  If you find any errors (ie. spelling, word misuse, plot gaps, etc.) please let me know either by email (which can be found in my bio) or by leaving a review.  All comments and help are greatly appreciated.  Special thanks to thebigW for pointing many of these out to me.