InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Soul Exchange ❯ The Getaway ( Chapter 26 )
[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]
By: RozeFire 
Anime/Manga: InuYasha Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Romance / Drama / Comedy / Angst / Action | Type: Alternate Universe | Uploaded On: 07.25.2003 | Pages: 6 | Words: 4.6K | Visits: 1.7K | Status: Completed
Anime/Manga: InuYasha Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Romance / Drama / Comedy / Angst / Action | Type: Alternate Universe | Uploaded On: 07.25.2003 | Pages: 6 | Words: 4.6K | Visits: 1.7K | Status: Completed
AN: As much as I would love to write twenty odd more chapters for this fic - I really can't! There comes a point when you drag a story out too far and the plot becomes contrived and repetitive.
If you think about it, there are 26 chapters to this story, each of a length of twelve pages (some seventeen pages long), roughly (in Microsoft Word). So over the past 2 months I've written what could be considered a decent sized novel! (just over 300 pages long) I'd love to continue the story and make it last longer... but I seriously can't. Well, all good things come to an end eventually. I'll just have to get to work thinking up an even better story ^_^
(Wish I was Ookami-chan... then I could make a story last so much longer...)
Anyway, some of you may or may not like the outcome of this chapter... but don't worry, I have an epilogue in mind.
Soul Exchange
The Getaway
"This is unbelievable..." Lady Inu shook her head at the mess in the throne room and planted her fists on her hips. "Absolutely ridiculous..."
"Oh look - found a piece of Naraku!" Miroku picked up a severed hand from the rubble around his feet.
"Ew - Miroku - put that down!" Sango freaked out.
Miroku shrugged and dropped it back onto the remains of dust and shredded Baboon pelt. He then moved to pick up the cuffs Inuyasha had dropped.
"Don't touch those!" Lady Inu suddenly jumped. "Pick those up and you become the new King!"
Miroku hesitated, though he still looked like he was about to pick them up. Sango rolled her eyes. "You want to have a mental break down like Inuyasha as well."
"Mm..." Was all Miroku said to that as he straightened and started sifting through the clutter for other objects that might still be in tact.
"Ok... here's what we do." Lady Inu took charge at once. "Sango - you go down to the dungeons and release Urami - make sure she leaves this palace. By the end of the day I want NO spies in this palace whatsoever. Miroku - you go get that sage woman from the village three miles down the south east road. She'll be able to help flush out the spies as well. Kouga?"
"Yeah?" Kouga turned grumpily to Lady Inu.
"You can go now, we don't need your service any more thank you." She told him primly. "And I'm sure you're aware now that Kagome has no intention of going home with you. She shall remain here."
Kouga scoffed slightly. "You're willing to keep her here? She's not even a noble lady! She lied to you!"
"Wow... you seem to have a high opinion of her..." Sango muttered darkly.
"A white lie I am sure." Lady Inu said sharply. "Please leave at once."
Kouga shrugged. "Whatever, I was gonna leave anyway. There's nothing much here now that I see it. No point conquering it."
"And Kagome - you go convince Inuyasha to stay." Lady Inu turned. "Hang on... where did she go?"
"She's five steps ahead of you, Lady Inu." Sango told Lady Inu as she hefted Fushi against her shoulder and headed off with Miroku to go and carry out her orders.
^_^
"Inuy asha - Inuyasha!" Kagome yelled as she ran down the steps of the palace, picking up her skirts so she didn't trip over. She spotted Inuyasha at once in the stables, leading a bay horse out of the sheltered pen to start readying it for riding. "Inuyasha - wait!"
"Piss of Kagome!" he yelled back without looking in her direction.
Kagome decided to ignore the warning in his voice and ran after him, towards the stables. She arrived behind him and waited for him to turn and acknowledge her.
He didn't do anything of the sort. He simply carried on gearing up the horse and attaching a halter and reins. Kagome had to move out of his way as he moved backwards and forwards to do the job. After a moment, she realised if she did nothing he would simply mount the horse and leave.
"Inuyasha... please stay and listen - you're being irrational!" she tried, following him as he moved back and forth. He wouldn't keep still and she couldn't block his path, he would just push her out the way. "You have to listen to me!"
"You've had a month to have me listen to you. You've had all the time in the world to explain to me. But you've just chosen to lie to me and betray me again and again." Inuyasha told her curtly as he grabbed a saddle from a post and carried it across to the horse. "You've had your chance, I'm not listening anymore to your pathetic little lies to get yourself out of trouble."
"Inuyasha... please..." Kagome was struggling to breathe properly. "Don't do this - don't just leave us all in the dust because of me!"
"Why does it always have to be about you?!" Inuyasha snapped. "I'm leaving for reasons other than you, ya know! My world doesn't revolve around you - believe it or not you don't matter THAT much!"
"Ow!" Kagome stared at him in shock. "That's a little harsh."
"Oh, of course. How could I have been so inconsiderate?" Inuyasha replied sarcastically.
"You may hate me - but I love you! You know that right?!" Kagome tried to block his way so he couldn't gear the horse, trying to make eye contact with him. "My answer is yes! I want to marry you... anything... I want to be with you... please..."
He paused a moment, though his expression didn't change and he refused to look at her, instead staring at the saddle in his hand. "That's too bad. I'm not asking anymore."
"But you said all those things - how can you take them back?!"
"Surprisingly easily, actually." He forcibly pushed her out of the way, but even Kagome noted the way he was hesitant to touch her. "It was a momentary lapse of reason. Nothing more."
"Fine... be that way." Kagome folded her arms as she watched him work. "I don't care if you hate me right now - but I want you to know the truth."
He didn't say anything, he just ignored her. Kagome found the opportunity easy to go on. "I didn't seek out Naraku to make that deal. I didn't realise what I'd let myself into when I agreed to let him revive Kouga. I thought I was doing a decent thing! Besides - no one was at risk of getting hurt - only myself."
"Am I supposed to think you as selfless now?" Inuyasha asked scathingly.
"No... it was a selfish thing to do. I didn't want to be alone so I made a compromise so that Kouga could keep me company. You had no idea what it's like... my family had disowned me, they hated me as much as you hate me now and then Kouga abandoned me to come fight you - of which I knew nothing of!"
Inuyasha rolled his eyes as he moved around to the other side of the horse to secure the saddle on that side. Kagome followed him. "When I discovered my soul was in danger I set about searching for the Shikon no Tama so I could hide from Naraku - I was following Kikyo's trail in order to find it. Then I heard a rumour that an Inu lord had the Shikon jewel in his possession... and then Naraku came to me and told me to go and kill you in order to get my soul back. I put two and two together and assumed YOU were the one with the Shikon no Tama... I came here to find you... but I only came for the Shikon, I didn't come for you."
"Is that supposed to make it all better?" he snapped. "You still betrayed me!"
"I lied - I had to! All I had heard about you were nasty rumours! That you were just as evil and mean as Sesshomaru - I thought if I told you then you'd kill me!"
"Of course I would have killed you!"
"So sorry for keeping quiet about it!" Kagome argued. "I'm not dumb enough to tell you about my deal - I barely knew you! But when I arrived I bumped into Sesshomaru and he poisoned me - he said to get the cure I had to-"
"I know that part." Inuyasha interrupted abruptly.
"Well... I didn't know you yet and I thought maybe I could do that for Sesshomaru. I had no intention of harming you... but when I got to know you, I decided I couldn't betray you like that, that I wouldn't tell Sesshomaru about the new moon."
"So you told him anyway!"
"I didn't! The spy approached me and I told him it was the full moon!" Kagome argued. "I'm sorry - all I wanted was a cure to save my life, but I didn't want to compromise you! I thought that was the best thing to do!"
"If that's true then how come he attacked on the new moon?!"
"Because he thought you were out of the country!" Kagome yelled back. "That's why he attacked! And if you hadn't left he would have waited until the next full moon in order to attack!"
"You spin lies as well as Naraku." Inuyasha told her quietly and turned away from her to continue gearing the horse.
"Stop saying things like that!" Kagome grabbed his ear and pulled him back around. "And don't turn your back on me!"
"Good point - you may just stab it!" He slapped her hand away angrily and continued his work.
"Look at me!" Kagome slipped in between him and the horse, taking Inuyasha by surprise, and for the first time since their talk in the closet, he looked her dead in the eyes.
And now she knew why he didn't want to look her in the eyes... and it made her heart break. It wasn't fair how women always seemed to talk about having heart break worse than men... Inuyasha was suffering just as badly. She could see the pain clearly in his expression now that he looked at her. He couldn't hide it as well as they all thought... Remorse and guilt pricked Kagome's conscious. "Oh... Inuyasha..."
He snapped his eyes to the side, away from her gaze and pushed her out of his way to continue. Kagome staggered slightly, but refused to leave. "You're hurting... I'm sorry..."
"I'm not hurting." He snapped. "I'm not weak."
"I promise... what I've told you is the truth and nothing but the truth and there's nothing more I can tell you that can convince you that I did what I thought was right!" Kagome wanted to slap herself for making this painful for him... but it was in no way her fault. "I made ONE mistake in believing Naraku when he told me I'd be in control of my soul - but everything after that was out of my control! I didn't ask to be poisoned! I didn't ask it for you to be the one with the Shikon! I didn't ask to fall in love with you! I can't turn my emotions off like you think you can do! I just had to go with the flow and hope it turned out all right... It's lucky I didn't get anyone killed."
"You got Naraku killed." Inuyasha pointed out.
"Yeah... but you killed him." Kagome said quietly. "You saved my life... and my soul... I can't repay you for that."
She thought about that for a moment.
"But maybe I could... if you'd let me I'd try and make you the happiest man on this land."
He snorted. "The only way you can make me happy is by staying away from me! I killed him to pay respect for Kikyo's death!"
"So it had nothing to do with the fact he was strangling me?!"
"I wouldn't have cared any more or less!"
Kagome knew that wasn't true. She'd seen it in his eyes that he was hurt because of her new 'betrayal'. She had to make him see that he could trust her... "I swear Inuyasha... I have nothing to lie about or hide from you now... it's over... please... just let it go."
"It's not that easy." He snapped. "I can't just forgive and forget like before."
"Why not?!" Kagome burst out.
He turned to her with a serious look, raising his fist slightly to her eye level. "If I hit you would you forgive me?"
Kagome blinked at him, suddenly very worried. "Maybe..."
"And if I hit you twice would you forgive me again?"
Kagome saw what he meant. In effect, it was like she'd hit HIM twice with her betrayal. She quickly nodded. "Yes, I'd forgive you. Completely!"
"You're smarter than that. If I hit you twice you would NEVER forgive me. You wouldn't stick around to see if I'd do it a third time."
"Maybe I would if I loved you."
"No you wouldn't."
He was right actually... one of Kagome's sisters had once got involved with a woman beater. He'd hit her once... apologised, done it again, apologised... and then beaten her up... and still Kagome's sister had forgiven him because she said she'd been in love.
Now Kagome's sister was dead and Kagome had taught herself to beware of the men who beat their wives. If Inuyasha hit her she'd be out the door so fast he'd still be finishing throwing that same punch when she slammed it close.
Inuyasha wasn't stupid either... he wasn't going to stick around to wait for her to try and betray him a third time.
"No... I wouldn't forgive you..." Kagome answered truthfully, in a small voice.
"Then you understand why I have to leave." He dropped his fist and began to mount his horse.
~_~
Sango dropped a sleeping Fushi off in her rooms before heading down to the dungeons to fetch Urami out of her cell. She waved at the guard as she went down the stone steps to let her pass. She went right to the cell door and slipped back the iron bolt to open the door.
"Nice to see you've stopped crying - you're free to go~OH MY GOD!" Sango screamed and threw herself out of the cell and against the wall opposite. The guards instantly ran to aid her.
"What is it?!" they demanded.
"She's - uh - not got a head anymore..." Sango cringed. "Oh god... that's... urgh... god..."
The guards went in to examine what was left of Urami. One nodded to the other in confirmation. "Northern blade's work."
"Dead spies tell no tales." The other agreed.
Sango peered after them. "She's dead right?"
^_^
"Wait !" Kagome grabbed Inuyasha's jacket to keep him from getting on. "You can't go yet!"
"And why not?" he growled.
"Because... uh..." Kagome searched for a new excuse. "Do you plan to look like a king for the rest of your life? Those clothes aren't really fitting considering you're not King anymore."
He glared at her for a moment before shrugging out of his jacket and dumping it on the floor beside her. He also unsnapped his money pouch from his waist sash and tossed it to her. "Déjà vu?"
"Yeah..." she weighed the money in her hand, feeling slightly sick. "Inuyasha... please don't leave them... don't leave me. But the others - your friends - they did nothing to deserve this! Don't abandon them!"
"I'm not abandoning them!" he pulled himself up onto his horse. "They have each other!"
"Well I don't have anyone - are you just going to abandon me?!"
"That's the plan!"
"You're just being spiteful and petty and doing this in a fit of anger!" she snapped, starting to walk alongside the horse that he'd set into motion. "You're running away like a coward! Things get tough for you and you freak out and make a getaway! Well I have news for you - things got tough for me back there and I stuck with it and tried to do the right thing! I didn't abandon my obligation!"
"Did you even have one?!" he shouted down at her.
"To protect you! I could have killed you or let someone kill you in oh so many different ways but I made sure that you were safe!"
"Yeah right!"
"I respect you Inuyasha... but if you runaway now I'll lose that respect!" she told him firmly. "You'll just prove you're more coward than me!"
"No one could be more coward than you!"
Kagome growled in frustration and moved to block the horse he was riding before he could leave the stable grounds. But this wasn't the gelding like last time, and the horse didn't stop for her. It just walked straight into her and knocked her to the side, out of it's way.
Kagome staggered and fell onto the soft grass beneath her. Inuyasha paused a moment, looking slightly worried. "You ok?"
"Stupid question." She stood up and retaliated angrily. Quite simply, she jerked the strap under the horses flank to loosen the saddle. Inuyasha's weight was a little too much to hold on an unstable saddle and he promptly slipped off the horse sideways with a curse.
"You ok?" Kagome asked sarcastically.
"Bitch! You did that deliberately!"
"What made you think that?" Kagome walked around the horse to help him up. "Now will you please stop a moment and listen?"
"No."
"Stay Inuyasha. Stay and I will show you that you can trust me - I promise!" she told him, but he ignored her offered hand and stood up on his own.
"I don't want to stay with you. I want to go and I want it to be the end of the matter." He said jerkily.
"But why won't you give me a second chance?!" she demanded.
"Because you'll do a Kikyo on me!" he snapped back, locking heated gazes with her again. "All women are the same - they all have ulterior motives and secret plans! They never really say what they mean and they always betray you in the end!"
"I won't do that! And what the hell is a Kikyo?"
"You'll sacrifice me for your own ideals and beliefs." He feigned sudden surprise. "Oh wait - you've already done that!"
"No - I never did that!" She snapped. "And not all women are treacherous snakes like you'd believe!"
"Oh yes they are!"
"No they're not!"
"They have to be!"
"Why?!"
"Because if I'm wrong then girls don't betray all men they just betray me!" he yelled, voicing his own fear that he'd been keeping to himself for a long time.
Kagome felt her argument leave her voice and she fell quiet. After a moment Inuyasha turned away and picked up the saddle to sit it back on top of horse.
Seeing that she was having absolutely no effect on his decision she began to panic and get desperate. She lurched forward and grabbed his shoulder to keep him from placing the saddle back on the horse. "No - don't do this - don't go!"
"Let me go, Kagome!" he tried to shrug her off and get on with the task.
Kagome refused to obey and tugged harder, even getting him to half turn towards her. "Why do you have to leave? It should be me! I'm the one who's caused all this mess - I should be the one made to leave!"
"It's my choice!" he snapped, turning to grab her wrists in an effort to keep her from tugging at him. "Just let me leave!"
"No - I caused this - I should go!"
"You didn't do anything Kagome, it was Naraku, Kouga and Sesshomaru. You're an innocent."
Kagome's struggling ceased and she gazed at him in amazement. "Does... does this mean you believe me...?"
Inuyasha jerked back suddenly, realising that the longer he stayed the softer he was going to get until he would soon be unable to leave. He had to go. Now.
"This means nothing." He threw back at her and let go of her wrists in favour of getting the saddle back on. He hadn't moved much further when Kagome grabbed his shirt and pulled him back around to face her.
Inuyasha flinched slightly at how close she was standing to him, wanting to step back, but the horse blocked his escape. Kagome was looking at him with an odd express again as she gripped his shirt tighter and leaned up on tiptoe so she was almost nose to nose with him.
She was getting bad ideas... and Inuyasha didn't like that. He tried to step back after all and backed into the horse, which didn't budge. Kagome frowned at his action and looked slightly hurt, but then more determined than ever. "Why do you have to runaway from me?"
Inuyasha was about to answer when Kagome's hands touched his cheeks and he was forcibly pulled down to meet her lips. Inuyasha froze... and Kagome wasn't sure if that was a good sign or not. Well, at least he wasn't pushing her away. She knew he would push her away if he wanted to... he was strong enough to do so after all.
For a moment all they did was stand there, touching lips, until Kagome was about to pull away. Although, seconds before she did just that, the saddle slipped from Inuyasha's weak grip and hit the ground with a thud. She felt his hesitant hand touch her shoulder slightly and he lifted his chin slightly to move his lips more fully against hers.
Kagome almost sighed with relief. This was the complete opposite of pushing her away... maybe now he was going to forgive her?
He held her lips like that for a while until they both eventually, if not slowly, parted. Inuyasha blinked rapidly as if he'd only just woken up while Kagome watched him intensely for a new reaction. She waited for a smile.
But it never came.
"Nice try." He said shortly before turning away to pick up the saddle again.
Kagome gasped in outrage. That had been the sweetest most honest kiss that she'd given anyone! How dare he just shrug it off?!
"That's it! I've had it with your attitude!" she grabbed the saddle. "Gimme that!"
"Get off, bitch!"
"YOU get off!" she threw back and struggled with a tug of war over the equipment, while the horse edged away from the struggle slightly. "I am not letting you throw away your family and your friends and your heritage just because of this little tiff!"
"This is not a little tiff!" he shouted back. "I'll never forgive you!".
Kagome sharply let go of the saddle and watched him evenly as he suddenly fell over backwards due to the momentum. "Oops." She said, rather insincerely.
"Bitch!" he threw the saddle off his chest.
"Call me that one more time, Inuyasha, and I will make you eat worms again!"
"As if!" he snorted and began to get up. "A bitch like you couldn't-"
He didn't get a chance to finish that sentence as Kagome suddenly launched herself on top of him and pushed his head back against the ground. She scraped a fist full of grass and dirt from beside his head and smudged it over his cheek and stuffed the grass in his mouth.
He spluttered angrily as he spat out the grass and quickly turned the tables on her, flipping them over with his superior strength. Kagome was getting a strange feeling of déjà vu again...
"Let's see how you like it!" he grabbed a fist of dirt and smeared it over her face in retaliation.
Kagome tried to knee him in the family jewels like last time, but he seemed to have remembered that trick and pinned her legs down with his own.
"Get off me you big bully!" she yelled. "I swear I'll scream rape!"
"Just you try it!" he wrestled to keep her hands from pulling his hair.
"RAPE!" Kagome screamed at the top of her lungs. Inuyasha quickly covered her mouth with his hand, looking slightly surprised. Kagome took the opportunity to flick his ears hard and tug his hair in quick succession. She laughed as he quickly moved his hands back to her wrists to keep her from pulling his hair again, but this only freed her mouth again. "Wrong move! RA-"
Inuyasha was out of appendages to shut her up with and so had to swallow the rest of her scream with his mouth. The surprise alone was enough to quiet her down. He knew he shouldn't be doing this... the closer he got to her the more reluctant he became to leave. But in a way he couldn't help it, he wanted to kiss Kagome...
He couldn't help but feel it was about damn time...
Kagome began to shake beneath him and he felt warm moisture dampen her cheeks. He pulled back at once when he realised she was beginning to cry... uh... he hadn't meant to do that. "Kagome..."
"You won't change you're mind... will you?" she said in a strained voice, thick with tears.
He shook his head slightly.
She closed her eyes as in despair, starting to sit up, forcing Inuyasha to get off her. "I knew it... I knew I'd gone too far... you'll go and I'll miss you so much... I'll go crazy with loneliness..."
He watched her as she continued to cry, a little more hysterically than before. "You saved my life - no - my soul!... There's no way to repay that..."
"Well now we're even." Inuyasha said flatly. "If it had been anyone else in your place... if Naraku had chosen some other girl... I know I would be dead by now..."
Kagome's sobs subdued slightly and she swiped away her tears to see him properly. "That's really nice of you considering..."
"I'm still leaving though." He started to stand but Kagome quickly stood with him and grabbed his sleeve.
"I promise I'll try to be better..." she told him, feeling like a child telling her mother she'd be good from then on.
"I don't feel I know you anymore. What I think of you... it's all based on a lie isn't it?" he watched her carefully.
"No! I never had to pretend about my feelings or who I was! What you see is what I am! I love you - I always did..."
"How do I know you aren't lying right now?" he pointed out.
"Why would I?" Kagome frowned at him. "I've nothing left to hide from you... you know who I am... what I did... you MUST know how sorry I am... for what I did..." she was rambling... but she was desperate, and she just couldn't find the words to express how she felt. "I don't know how to convince you that I'm telling the truth... I just am... you'll have to trust me on that."
Inuyasha paused for a long time before speaking. "I can't Kagome..."
There was only a certain amount of times a heart could break... and it had broken twice for Kagome already. He didn't want to break it a third time... he didn't think he could summon enough strength to love her again.
But inside he knew he did... he'd never lost the love for her...
He suddenly stepped forward and pulled her into a tight embrace, one which she reciprocated instantly with silent tears that wracked her small frame. "I can't trust you..." he repeated, stroking her hair idly before closing his eyes and tightening his grip.
"But I'll stay and learn to..."
AN: That's the end? Hm... not quite, I still have an epilogue in mind but that may take some time to write. Anyway, for now, that'll be the end ^_^
If you think about it, there are 26 chapters to this story, each of a length of twelve pages (some seventeen pages long), roughly (in Microsoft Word). So over the past 2 months I've written what could be considered a decent sized novel! (just over 300 pages long) I'd love to continue the story and make it last longer... but I seriously can't. Well, all good things come to an end eventually. I'll just have to get to work thinking up an even better story ^_^
(Wish I was Ookami-chan... then I could make a story last so much longer...)
Anyway, some of you may or may not like the outcome of this chapter... but don't worry, I have an epilogue in mind.
Soul Exchange
The Getaway
"This is unbelievable..." Lady Inu shook her head at the mess in the throne room and planted her fists on her hips. "Absolutely ridiculous..."
"Oh look - found a piece of Naraku!" Miroku picked up a severed hand from the rubble around his feet.
"Ew - Miroku - put that down!" Sango freaked out.
Miroku shrugged and dropped it back onto the remains of dust and shredded Baboon pelt. He then moved to pick up the cuffs Inuyasha had dropped.
"Don't touch those!" Lady Inu suddenly jumped. "Pick those up and you become the new King!"
Miroku hesitated, though he still looked like he was about to pick them up. Sango rolled her eyes. "You want to have a mental break down like Inuyasha as well."
"Mm..." Was all Miroku said to that as he straightened and started sifting through the clutter for other objects that might still be in tact.
"Ok... here's what we do." Lady Inu took charge at once. "Sango - you go down to the dungeons and release Urami - make sure she leaves this palace. By the end of the day I want NO spies in this palace whatsoever. Miroku - you go get that sage woman from the village three miles down the south east road. She'll be able to help flush out the spies as well. Kouga?"
"Yeah?" Kouga turned grumpily to Lady Inu.
"You can go now, we don't need your service any more thank you." She told him primly. "And I'm sure you're aware now that Kagome has no intention of going home with you. She shall remain here."
Kouga scoffed slightly. "You're willing to keep her here? She's not even a noble lady! She lied to you!"
"Wow... you seem to have a high opinion of her..." Sango muttered darkly.
"A white lie I am sure." Lady Inu said sharply. "Please leave at once."
Kouga shrugged. "Whatever, I was gonna leave anyway. There's nothing much here now that I see it. No point conquering it."
"And Kagome - you go convince Inuyasha to stay." Lady Inu turned. "Hang on... where did she go?"
"She's five steps ahead of you, Lady Inu." Sango told Lady Inu as she hefted Fushi against her shoulder and headed off with Miroku to go and carry out her orders.
^_^
"Inuy asha - Inuyasha!" Kagome yelled as she ran down the steps of the palace, picking up her skirts so she didn't trip over. She spotted Inuyasha at once in the stables, leading a bay horse out of the sheltered pen to start readying it for riding. "Inuyasha - wait!"
"Piss of Kagome!" he yelled back without looking in her direction.
Kagome decided to ignore the warning in his voice and ran after him, towards the stables. She arrived behind him and waited for him to turn and acknowledge her.
He didn't do anything of the sort. He simply carried on gearing up the horse and attaching a halter and reins. Kagome had to move out of his way as he moved backwards and forwards to do the job. After a moment, she realised if she did nothing he would simply mount the horse and leave.
"Inuyasha... please stay and listen - you're being irrational!" she tried, following him as he moved back and forth. He wouldn't keep still and she couldn't block his path, he would just push her out the way. "You have to listen to me!"
"You've had a month to have me listen to you. You've had all the time in the world to explain to me. But you've just chosen to lie to me and betray me again and again." Inuyasha told her curtly as he grabbed a saddle from a post and carried it across to the horse. "You've had your chance, I'm not listening anymore to your pathetic little lies to get yourself out of trouble."
"Inuyasha... please..." Kagome was struggling to breathe properly. "Don't do this - don't just leave us all in the dust because of me!"
"Why does it always have to be about you?!" Inuyasha snapped. "I'm leaving for reasons other than you, ya know! My world doesn't revolve around you - believe it or not you don't matter THAT much!"
"Ow!" Kagome stared at him in shock. "That's a little harsh."
"Oh, of course. How could I have been so inconsiderate?" Inuyasha replied sarcastically.
"You may hate me - but I love you! You know that right?!" Kagome tried to block his way so he couldn't gear the horse, trying to make eye contact with him. "My answer is yes! I want to marry you... anything... I want to be with you... please..."
He paused a moment, though his expression didn't change and he refused to look at her, instead staring at the saddle in his hand. "That's too bad. I'm not asking anymore."
"But you said all those things - how can you take them back?!"
"Surprisingly easily, actually." He forcibly pushed her out of the way, but even Kagome noted the way he was hesitant to touch her. "It was a momentary lapse of reason. Nothing more."
"Fine... be that way." Kagome folded her arms as she watched him work. "I don't care if you hate me right now - but I want you to know the truth."
He didn't say anything, he just ignored her. Kagome found the opportunity easy to go on. "I didn't seek out Naraku to make that deal. I didn't realise what I'd let myself into when I agreed to let him revive Kouga. I thought I was doing a decent thing! Besides - no one was at risk of getting hurt - only myself."
"Am I supposed to think you as selfless now?" Inuyasha asked scathingly.
"No... it was a selfish thing to do. I didn't want to be alone so I made a compromise so that Kouga could keep me company. You had no idea what it's like... my family had disowned me, they hated me as much as you hate me now and then Kouga abandoned me to come fight you - of which I knew nothing of!"
Inuyasha rolled his eyes as he moved around to the other side of the horse to secure the saddle on that side. Kagome followed him. "When I discovered my soul was in danger I set about searching for the Shikon no Tama so I could hide from Naraku - I was following Kikyo's trail in order to find it. Then I heard a rumour that an Inu lord had the Shikon jewel in his possession... and then Naraku came to me and told me to go and kill you in order to get my soul back. I put two and two together and assumed YOU were the one with the Shikon no Tama... I came here to find you... but I only came for the Shikon, I didn't come for you."
"Is that supposed to make it all better?" he snapped. "You still betrayed me!"
"I lied - I had to! All I had heard about you were nasty rumours! That you were just as evil and mean as Sesshomaru - I thought if I told you then you'd kill me!"
"Of course I would have killed you!"
"So sorry for keeping quiet about it!" Kagome argued. "I'm not dumb enough to tell you about my deal - I barely knew you! But when I arrived I bumped into Sesshomaru and he poisoned me - he said to get the cure I had to-"
"I know that part." Inuyasha interrupted abruptly.
"Well... I didn't know you yet and I thought maybe I could do that for Sesshomaru. I had no intention of harming you... but when I got to know you, I decided I couldn't betray you like that, that I wouldn't tell Sesshomaru about the new moon."
"So you told him anyway!"
"I didn't! The spy approached me and I told him it was the full moon!" Kagome argued. "I'm sorry - all I wanted was a cure to save my life, but I didn't want to compromise you! I thought that was the best thing to do!"
"If that's true then how come he attacked on the new moon?!"
"Because he thought you were out of the country!" Kagome yelled back. "That's why he attacked! And if you hadn't left he would have waited until the next full moon in order to attack!"
"You spin lies as well as Naraku." Inuyasha told her quietly and turned away from her to continue gearing the horse.
"Stop saying things like that!" Kagome grabbed his ear and pulled him back around. "And don't turn your back on me!"
"Good point - you may just stab it!" He slapped her hand away angrily and continued his work.
"Look at me!" Kagome slipped in between him and the horse, taking Inuyasha by surprise, and for the first time since their talk in the closet, he looked her dead in the eyes.
And now she knew why he didn't want to look her in the eyes... and it made her heart break. It wasn't fair how women always seemed to talk about having heart break worse than men... Inuyasha was suffering just as badly. She could see the pain clearly in his expression now that he looked at her. He couldn't hide it as well as they all thought... Remorse and guilt pricked Kagome's conscious. "Oh... Inuyasha..."
He snapped his eyes to the side, away from her gaze and pushed her out of his way to continue. Kagome staggered slightly, but refused to leave. "You're hurting... I'm sorry..."
"I'm not hurting." He snapped. "I'm not weak."
"I promise... what I've told you is the truth and nothing but the truth and there's nothing more I can tell you that can convince you that I did what I thought was right!" Kagome wanted to slap herself for making this painful for him... but it was in no way her fault. "I made ONE mistake in believing Naraku when he told me I'd be in control of my soul - but everything after that was out of my control! I didn't ask to be poisoned! I didn't ask it for you to be the one with the Shikon! I didn't ask to fall in love with you! I can't turn my emotions off like you think you can do! I just had to go with the flow and hope it turned out all right... It's lucky I didn't get anyone killed."
"You got Naraku killed." Inuyasha pointed out.
"Yeah... but you killed him." Kagome said quietly. "You saved my life... and my soul... I can't repay you for that."
She thought about that for a moment.
"But maybe I could... if you'd let me I'd try and make you the happiest man on this land."
He snorted. "The only way you can make me happy is by staying away from me! I killed him to pay respect for Kikyo's death!"
"So it had nothing to do with the fact he was strangling me?!"
"I wouldn't have cared any more or less!"
Kagome knew that wasn't true. She'd seen it in his eyes that he was hurt because of her new 'betrayal'. She had to make him see that he could trust her... "I swear Inuyasha... I have nothing to lie about or hide from you now... it's over... please... just let it go."
"It's not that easy." He snapped. "I can't just forgive and forget like before."
"Why not?!" Kagome burst out.
He turned to her with a serious look, raising his fist slightly to her eye level. "If I hit you would you forgive me?"
Kagome blinked at him, suddenly very worried. "Maybe..."
"And if I hit you twice would you forgive me again?"
Kagome saw what he meant. In effect, it was like she'd hit HIM twice with her betrayal. She quickly nodded. "Yes, I'd forgive you. Completely!"
"You're smarter than that. If I hit you twice you would NEVER forgive me. You wouldn't stick around to see if I'd do it a third time."
"Maybe I would if I loved you."
"No you wouldn't."
He was right actually... one of Kagome's sisters had once got involved with a woman beater. He'd hit her once... apologised, done it again, apologised... and then beaten her up... and still Kagome's sister had forgiven him because she said she'd been in love.
Now Kagome's sister was dead and Kagome had taught herself to beware of the men who beat their wives. If Inuyasha hit her she'd be out the door so fast he'd still be finishing throwing that same punch when she slammed it close.
Inuyasha wasn't stupid either... he wasn't going to stick around to wait for her to try and betray him a third time.
"No... I wouldn't forgive you..." Kagome answered truthfully, in a small voice.
"Then you understand why I have to leave." He dropped his fist and began to mount his horse.
~_~
Sango dropped a sleeping Fushi off in her rooms before heading down to the dungeons to fetch Urami out of her cell. She waved at the guard as she went down the stone steps to let her pass. She went right to the cell door and slipped back the iron bolt to open the door.
"Nice to see you've stopped crying - you're free to go~OH MY GOD!" Sango screamed and threw herself out of the cell and against the wall opposite. The guards instantly ran to aid her.
"What is it?!" they demanded.
"She's - uh - not got a head anymore..." Sango cringed. "Oh god... that's... urgh... god..."
The guards went in to examine what was left of Urami. One nodded to the other in confirmation. "Northern blade's work."
"Dead spies tell no tales." The other agreed.
Sango peered after them. "She's dead right?"
^_^
"Wait !" Kagome grabbed Inuyasha's jacket to keep him from getting on. "You can't go yet!"
"And why not?" he growled.
"Because... uh..." Kagome searched for a new excuse. "Do you plan to look like a king for the rest of your life? Those clothes aren't really fitting considering you're not King anymore."
He glared at her for a moment before shrugging out of his jacket and dumping it on the floor beside her. He also unsnapped his money pouch from his waist sash and tossed it to her. "Déjà vu?"
"Yeah..." she weighed the money in her hand, feeling slightly sick. "Inuyasha... please don't leave them... don't leave me. But the others - your friends - they did nothing to deserve this! Don't abandon them!"
"I'm not abandoning them!" he pulled himself up onto his horse. "They have each other!"
"Well I don't have anyone - are you just going to abandon me?!"
"That's the plan!"
"You're just being spiteful and petty and doing this in a fit of anger!" she snapped, starting to walk alongside the horse that he'd set into motion. "You're running away like a coward! Things get tough for you and you freak out and make a getaway! Well I have news for you - things got tough for me back there and I stuck with it and tried to do the right thing! I didn't abandon my obligation!"
"Did you even have one?!" he shouted down at her.
"To protect you! I could have killed you or let someone kill you in oh so many different ways but I made sure that you were safe!"
"Yeah right!"
"I respect you Inuyasha... but if you runaway now I'll lose that respect!" she told him firmly. "You'll just prove you're more coward than me!"
"No one could be more coward than you!"
Kagome growled in frustration and moved to block the horse he was riding before he could leave the stable grounds. But this wasn't the gelding like last time, and the horse didn't stop for her. It just walked straight into her and knocked her to the side, out of it's way.
Kagome staggered and fell onto the soft grass beneath her. Inuyasha paused a moment, looking slightly worried. "You ok?"
"Stupid question." She stood up and retaliated angrily. Quite simply, she jerked the strap under the horses flank to loosen the saddle. Inuyasha's weight was a little too much to hold on an unstable saddle and he promptly slipped off the horse sideways with a curse.
"You ok?" Kagome asked sarcastically.
"Bitch! You did that deliberately!"
"What made you think that?" Kagome walked around the horse to help him up. "Now will you please stop a moment and listen?"
"No."
"Stay Inuyasha. Stay and I will show you that you can trust me - I promise!" she told him, but he ignored her offered hand and stood up on his own.
"I don't want to stay with you. I want to go and I want it to be the end of the matter." He said jerkily.
"But why won't you give me a second chance?!" she demanded.
"Because you'll do a Kikyo on me!" he snapped back, locking heated gazes with her again. "All women are the same - they all have ulterior motives and secret plans! They never really say what they mean and they always betray you in the end!"
"I won't do that! And what the hell is a Kikyo?"
"You'll sacrifice me for your own ideals and beliefs." He feigned sudden surprise. "Oh wait - you've already done that!"
"No - I never did that!" She snapped. "And not all women are treacherous snakes like you'd believe!"
"Oh yes they are!"
"No they're not!"
"They have to be!"
"Why?!"
"Because if I'm wrong then girls don't betray all men they just betray me!" he yelled, voicing his own fear that he'd been keeping to himself for a long time.
Kagome felt her argument leave her voice and she fell quiet. After a moment Inuyasha turned away and picked up the saddle to sit it back on top of horse.
Seeing that she was having absolutely no effect on his decision she began to panic and get desperate. She lurched forward and grabbed his shoulder to keep him from placing the saddle back on the horse. "No - don't do this - don't go!"
"Let me go, Kagome!" he tried to shrug her off and get on with the task.
Kagome refused to obey and tugged harder, even getting him to half turn towards her. "Why do you have to leave? It should be me! I'm the one who's caused all this mess - I should be the one made to leave!"
"It's my choice!" he snapped, turning to grab her wrists in an effort to keep her from tugging at him. "Just let me leave!"
"No - I caused this - I should go!"
"You didn't do anything Kagome, it was Naraku, Kouga and Sesshomaru. You're an innocent."
Kagome's struggling ceased and she gazed at him in amazement. "Does... does this mean you believe me...?"
Inuyasha jerked back suddenly, realising that the longer he stayed the softer he was going to get until he would soon be unable to leave. He had to go. Now.
"This means nothing." He threw back at her and let go of her wrists in favour of getting the saddle back on. He hadn't moved much further when Kagome grabbed his shirt and pulled him back around to face her.
Inuyasha flinched slightly at how close she was standing to him, wanting to step back, but the horse blocked his escape. Kagome was looking at him with an odd express again as she gripped his shirt tighter and leaned up on tiptoe so she was almost nose to nose with him.
She was getting bad ideas... and Inuyasha didn't like that. He tried to step back after all and backed into the horse, which didn't budge. Kagome frowned at his action and looked slightly hurt, but then more determined than ever. "Why do you have to runaway from me?"
Inuyasha was about to answer when Kagome's hands touched his cheeks and he was forcibly pulled down to meet her lips. Inuyasha froze... and Kagome wasn't sure if that was a good sign or not. Well, at least he wasn't pushing her away. She knew he would push her away if he wanted to... he was strong enough to do so after all.
For a moment all they did was stand there, touching lips, until Kagome was about to pull away. Although, seconds before she did just that, the saddle slipped from Inuyasha's weak grip and hit the ground with a thud. She felt his hesitant hand touch her shoulder slightly and he lifted his chin slightly to move his lips more fully against hers.
Kagome almost sighed with relief. This was the complete opposite of pushing her away... maybe now he was going to forgive her?
He held her lips like that for a while until they both eventually, if not slowly, parted. Inuyasha blinked rapidly as if he'd only just woken up while Kagome watched him intensely for a new reaction. She waited for a smile.
But it never came.
"Nice try." He said shortly before turning away to pick up the saddle again.
Kagome gasped in outrage. That had been the sweetest most honest kiss that she'd given anyone! How dare he just shrug it off?!
"That's it! I've had it with your attitude!" she grabbed the saddle. "Gimme that!"
"Get off, bitch!"
"YOU get off!" she threw back and struggled with a tug of war over the equipment, while the horse edged away from the struggle slightly. "I am not letting you throw away your family and your friends and your heritage just because of this little tiff!"
"This is not a little tiff!" he shouted back. "I'll never forgive you!".
Kagome sharply let go of the saddle and watched him evenly as he suddenly fell over backwards due to the momentum. "Oops." She said, rather insincerely.
"Bitch!" he threw the saddle off his chest.
"Call me that one more time, Inuyasha, and I will make you eat worms again!"
"As if!" he snorted and began to get up. "A bitch like you couldn't-"
He didn't get a chance to finish that sentence as Kagome suddenly launched herself on top of him and pushed his head back against the ground. She scraped a fist full of grass and dirt from beside his head and smudged it over his cheek and stuffed the grass in his mouth.
He spluttered angrily as he spat out the grass and quickly turned the tables on her, flipping them over with his superior strength. Kagome was getting a strange feeling of déjà vu again...
"Let's see how you like it!" he grabbed a fist of dirt and smeared it over her face in retaliation.
Kagome tried to knee him in the family jewels like last time, but he seemed to have remembered that trick and pinned her legs down with his own.
"Get off me you big bully!" she yelled. "I swear I'll scream rape!"
"Just you try it!" he wrestled to keep her hands from pulling his hair.
"RAPE!" Kagome screamed at the top of her lungs. Inuyasha quickly covered her mouth with his hand, looking slightly surprised. Kagome took the opportunity to flick his ears hard and tug his hair in quick succession. She laughed as he quickly moved his hands back to her wrists to keep her from pulling his hair again, but this only freed her mouth again. "Wrong move! RA-"
Inuyasha was out of appendages to shut her up with and so had to swallow the rest of her scream with his mouth. The surprise alone was enough to quiet her down. He knew he shouldn't be doing this... the closer he got to her the more reluctant he became to leave. But in a way he couldn't help it, he wanted to kiss Kagome...
He couldn't help but feel it was about damn time...
Kagome began to shake beneath him and he felt warm moisture dampen her cheeks. He pulled back at once when he realised she was beginning to cry... uh... he hadn't meant to do that. "Kagome..."
"You won't change you're mind... will you?" she said in a strained voice, thick with tears.
He shook his head slightly.
She closed her eyes as in despair, starting to sit up, forcing Inuyasha to get off her. "I knew it... I knew I'd gone too far... you'll go and I'll miss you so much... I'll go crazy with loneliness..."
He watched her as she continued to cry, a little more hysterically than before. "You saved my life - no - my soul!... There's no way to repay that..."
"Well now we're even." Inuyasha said flatly. "If it had been anyone else in your place... if Naraku had chosen some other girl... I know I would be dead by now..."
Kagome's sobs subdued slightly and she swiped away her tears to see him properly. "That's really nice of you considering..."
"I'm still leaving though." He started to stand but Kagome quickly stood with him and grabbed his sleeve.
"I promise I'll try to be better..." she told him, feeling like a child telling her mother she'd be good from then on.
"I don't feel I know you anymore. What I think of you... it's all based on a lie isn't it?" he watched her carefully.
"No! I never had to pretend about my feelings or who I was! What you see is what I am! I love you - I always did..."
"How do I know you aren't lying right now?" he pointed out.
"Why would I?" Kagome frowned at him. "I've nothing left to hide from you... you know who I am... what I did... you MUST know how sorry I am... for what I did..." she was rambling... but she was desperate, and she just couldn't find the words to express how she felt. "I don't know how to convince you that I'm telling the truth... I just am... you'll have to trust me on that."
Inuyasha paused for a long time before speaking. "I can't Kagome..."
There was only a certain amount of times a heart could break... and it had broken twice for Kagome already. He didn't want to break it a third time... he didn't think he could summon enough strength to love her again.
But inside he knew he did... he'd never lost the love for her...
He suddenly stepped forward and pulled her into a tight embrace, one which she reciprocated instantly with silent tears that wracked her small frame. "I can't trust you..." he repeated, stroking her hair idly before closing his eyes and tightening his grip.
"But I'll stay and learn to..."
AN: That's the end? Hm... not quite, I still have an epilogue in mind but that may take some time to write. Anyway, for now, that'll be the end ^_^