InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Test ❯ Test ( Chapter 1 )

Youko Kurama reflected as he watched his mate. It had been exceedingly tough for her. She as a human miko, and she was mated to a silver kitsune; the most sensual and strong race of the fox themselves. He had to put her through tests, and she understood that part, after he'd sat down with her and explained that his inner youkai was demanding he test her according to youkai law.

Kurama shivered. It had been an okay courting, until the youkai in him had made itself known. He needed to test her loyalty, he needed to test her strength, he needed to test her instincts, he needed to test her psyche, and he needed to test her love.

It had been very hard on her.

They had been having a nice human courtship, with the flowers and the sweet nothings and the promises. Then his youkai had woken up. He'd hit her, yell at her, sneer at her, and scare her. And she still stayed. She had proved her loyalty.

Even when her friends had tried to take her away she had stayed, she had proved her devotion and her inner strength. She hadn't known what he was doing then, and he had frightened her, perhaps that was the reason she hadn't left for fear of him going after her. But no, he remembered one night.

`Kurama doushite? Please I'm sorry, what did I do? I didn't mean it I swear!' She had apologized even as she never knew what to apologize for. He'd felt ashamed. His more human understanding and instincts knew that there was no test for love, that loyalty and devotion and strength could fail at any time and there were no true tests for any. And he knew that the psyche could turn on oneself, trapping one in the mind so they could relive a horror and mistake or shelter themselves for the rest of their lives.

But Youko had understood they needed to do this…and it was only when the youkai had gone too far that Youko himself became enraged.

The youkai in him had taken over his body, instincts driving it to test his soon to be mate once again. Despite the adamant refusal and the calm but threatening emotion of Youko, the inner beast had taken over their body to test her mind. He had forced himself upon her.

He remembered her cries, her tears, and her screams. But they weren't the type they had wanted. They had been of fear and pain and shame. She had been hurt, they had hurt her. Her struggles had only incensed their youkai, causing him to be rougher, harsher, and more violent. And she got hurt even more.

 

Now he watched her in their bed, her hands were lightly holding the slight bulge in her stomach, and he was shamed. Yes, that was his child in her womb; yes, he had a strong mate; yes, she loved him unconditionally…but sometimes.

Sometimes at night, while she was sleeping none the less, her body would cringe away from his.