InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ That's My Girl! ❯ Little Sesshoumaru and the Fake Divorce Lawyer ( Chapter 5 )

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Disclaimer:  I do not own the characters of Inuyasha.

~oOo~

It had been about a week since Sesshoumaru had kissed his Kagome and made her his wife.  In that time, he'd been quite thankful to Ayame for the idea, and had been trying to decide on a suitable gift.  In order to do the job properly, as Sesshoumaru always did everything, however, he decided that he needed to get to know the little wolf princess better, since just giving her some random gift wouldn't be a true measure of his gratitude for the excellent job she'd done in helping him cement his hold on his female – and get rid of the scent of smelly wolf pelt on her.

In an effort to do just that, he'd begun spending more time with her – but without thinking about it, he'd been letting Kagome spend that same time with her friend little Sango, and without him.  

It hadn't occurred to him that this might cause problems...

Now, little Kouga might be annoying, but he wasn't stupid, and this situation looked like a promising circumstance in his quest to steal Kagome from Sesshoumaru.  On top of that, he'd hooked up with a new kid, a devious little hanyou named Naraku, who had not hit it off with the haughty Sesshoumaru at all, and wanted to throw a wrench into the spoiled little Western Heir's life.  On their side, also, was little Kagura, and little Kanna, who wanted to break up the perfect couple of little Sesshoumaru and little Kagome – for obvious reasons.

Little Naraku, whose father was a very wealthy divorce lawyer, had listened to the tale of the 'wedding' with scarce hidden interest – and then eyed the silver-haired Sesshoumaru as he wandered around with little Ayame, paying almost no attention to little Kagome.  It didn't take him long to come up with a plan, and taking his newfound friend into a quiet corner of the playground, he whispered his plan to him.  Little Kouga was, needless to say, ecstatic at what the red-eyed boy was telling him, and nodded, his blue eyes lighting up.

Both boys wandered back out onto the playground looking as inconspicuous as possible, and little Kouga quietly and slowly inched his way close to the object of his affections, hoping and praying that little Sesshoumaru was too busy kissing up to little Ayame, the object of his nightmares, to notice.

This time, luck was with him, and he finally was able to bask in little Kagome's presence...

But he had a role to play, and it was time to get to it, so with a light scowl on his face, he looked at little Kagome and asked,  “Did Sesshoumaru decide he didn't want you anymore or something?  Because now all the time he's always all over Ayame.  That's called cheating, and it's not nice.”

Little Kagome's eyes opened wide, and then she looked at little Sesshoumaru across the playground listening intently to something the little red-headed wolf was saying, before looking back at little Kouga.  “W-what do you mean?  What's cheating?”

“Cheating is what he's doing!”  he exclaimed.  “He said you were his woman, right?”  At her nod, he continued.  “But now he's ignoring you and chasing her.  He doesn't want you anymore, he wants her, and that's wrong and mean.  It's like two-timing!”

Eyes suddenly tearing up, little Kagome's lower lip wobbled, and then she started to cry.  “But... but we're married!  He kissed me!  Now what do I do if he doesn't want me?”

Little Sango, who'd listened with dawning horror to what little Kouga was saying, patted her friend's back and glared across the playground at an oblivious little Sesshoumaru, not sure what to say.  She looked at little Kouga with hope.  “Do you know what she should do?”  she asked.  He seemed to know all about this cheating thing, so maybe he'd know what to do about it.

That was what little Kouga had been waiting for.  He nodded.  “Yes.  You have to get a d-divorce.  That means that you aren't married to him anymore,”  he said, trying his darndest to keep from grinning.  Little Naraku had been right – it was working!

“How do I do this divorce t-thing, then?”  little Kagome whimpered, very, very hurt.  

Kouga tugged on her arm and began to lead her to little Naraku.  “Little Naraku can help you.  His dad's a... a law-yer, he said, and he knows how to do those divorces.  He'll take care of you, and then you can forget all about this cheating thing.”

Trailed quietly by little Sango, little Kagome and little Kouga made it back across the playground to little Naraku, who had been watching the progress of his little scheme with avid eyes.  He waited for little Kouga to introduce him, and then finish his part by telling him of little Sesshoumaru's supposed 'cheating'.  

Little Naraku nodded thoughtfully at the tale, his face arranged in the same solemn manner as he always saw his father's as he would leave in the morning to go to work, and when Kouga finished his explanations, he said,  “So you want to divorce him?”  When little Kagome hesitantly nodded, he returned it.  “Then I can take care of that.  I will speak to him as your law-yer, and tell him that you're not his woman anymore.”

Still crying, little Kagome gulped out a sad little “Okay,” and without further ado, a smirking little Naraku made his way across the playground to little Sesshoumaru and cleared his throat importantly.  When the silver-headed boy looked over at him disdainfully, Naraku said,  “I am rep-present-ting miss Kagome as her law-yer.  You have been caught cheating on her, and she is divorcing you.  That means that she is not your woman anymore.”  

With that, little Naraku turned and made his self-important way back to the little group that was standing across the grounds, little Sango still trying to comfort a teary blue-eyed miko, his evil plans complete – the couple were now divorced, and he'd thrown that wrench he'd wanted to right into little Sesshoumaru's perfect little life.

Now, divorce wasn't a word that little Sesshoumaru had ever heard before, his father managing to keep his son from learning it in his own divorce from his son's mother, but he wasn't a brilliantly smart boy for nothing, and he'd caught what little Naraku had said about her not being his wife anymore – it was just like his mother wasn't his father's wife anymore.  What confused him was the whole 'cheating' thing.  What was he cheating at?

Determined to find out exactly what was going on, and take back his little Kagome, who he now noticed was crying, little Sesshoumaru stomped across the yard, and confronted the group standing there and demanded to know just what he was cheating at – and why his woman was 'divorcing' him for it.

Little Naraku sniffed haughtily.  “You have spent several days with some other girl, leaving miss Kagome alone.  That's cheating, and that means that you don't want her anymore, so that's why she divorced you.  So now you can go away, cheater.”

Snarling, little Sesshoumaru started to say something to little Kagome, but the others all surrounded her and pushed him away, and with a smirk, little Naraku stuck out his tongue at little Sesshoumaru and whispered,  “That's what you get, baka.  You should have been nice to me.”

While little Kagome and little Sango didn't hear it, little Sesshoumaru certainly did, and suddenly, he got a calculating look on his face, and turned away to go talk to the one person that could help him out of this mess – his father.  It was clear to him that this was a nasty game that stupid hanyou was playing, trying to get him back for what he'd said to him about how he smelled when he'd met him.  But the hanyou had made the mistake of messing with the one thing guaranteed to make him angrier than anything else, and that was the female he'd chosen as his.

It was time to one-up that little bastard and take his Kagome back.  (Though he would never actually say such a word, of course, since it was beneath him, that didn't stop him from thinking it.)

It didn't take him long to apprise his sire of what was going on, and he was suitably pleased with the seriousness with which his father greeted his news.  And it wasn't long before the two had cooked up a nice little scheme to get not only Naraku back for his nasty game, but take his Kagome back, as well.  

Walking calmly back over to the group of huddling kids, he cleared his own throat, and then loudly said,  “This is just to inform you that you, Naraku, and you, Kouga, are both being sued.  As the heir to the Western Lord, such lies as you have both leveled against me are considered very slanderous, and are taken with the utmost seriousness by myself and my father.  Your parents will be contacted by my father's team of lawyers very shortly.”

Kouga had never heard the word 'sued' before – but he understood what lies were quite well – and the fact that his parents were about to find out what he'd been up to.  Not only would they be furious that he was caught out telling lies about the Western Heir, but that he'd done it because he liked Kagome, when he knew very well that they had betrothed him to Ayame when he was born, would really land him in hot water, and he cringed, his little tail beginning to lash in agitation as he began to realize that he'd really done it this time.

As for little Naraku, he had a pretty good idea what 'sued' meant, since his father had talked about that kind of thing before.  It usually meant that someone was going to lose a LOT of money... and suddenly, he was re-thinking what he'd just done.  Because one thing his father always took most seriously was money, and especially the loss of it.  The lying he could care less about, since lawyers spent most of their time lying, anyway.  His father had told him more than once that in the world of law, the best liars made the most money – but he'd just proved that he wasn't quite up to his father's standards for lying, and it was going to cost his sire a lot of money.  That meant that it was going to cost him a lot of toys.

Christmas this year was going to suck.

Both little boys began to sputter, but before they could really begin to spit out any excuses, or more lies, little Kagome, who'd been listening to all of it with wide eyes, spoke up, her sweet voice soft and uncertain.  

“They were lying?”  she asked, wide eyes meeting Sesshoumaru's solemn golden ones hopefully.

He inclined his head, a serious expression on his face.  “Yes.  I was not doing that 'cheating' thing, I was merely trying to get an idea of what little Ayame would like as a gift for her part in helping us get married.  That is not 'cheating'.  I would not decide that I no longer wanted you.  We are still courting, remember?  Getting married does not change that.”

Little Kagome started to smile at him, her tears drying up, but then he caught a familiar expression on her little face as she turned on the two boys that were still trying to get out excuses, and cut loose.

“How could you, Kouga!  I thought you were nicer than that, but that was just mean!  And you, too, Naraku.  I'm never going to believe anything you guys say ever again!”  she stormed, watching with satisfaction as little Sango, followed by little Ayame, who was irate at Kouga for trying to sneak Kagome away from Sesshoumaru when he knew he was betrothed to her, began to chase them with her boomerang.  That thing hurt, as little Miroku could attest to – he'd gotten banged with it yesterday by accident, and that was why he wasn't at playgroup today; he had a big headache and a lump on his head because of it.

Sesshoumaru also watched with a satisfied air as the two boys ran for their lives from the angry little Sango and little Ayame.  As far as he was concerned, they deserved it.  He wiped his hands together and said,  “And that should take care of them.  It is to be hoped that they have learned not to mess with this Sesshoumaru again, because I will always win.”

Little Kagome turned at the sound of his voice, and started to tear up again as she realized that even though the two boys had lied about him cheating, she had still agreed to their 'divorce'.  “B-but... 'Shoumaru, now we're divorced,”  she wailed.  “What are we gonna do?”

He reached out and tugged her hand, pulling her into a hug with a satisfied smirk.  “Do not worry, my Kagome.  We are not divorced.  I asked father, and he said that little Naraku isn't a lawyer, his father is, so whatever he said doesn't count.  Everything is alright,”  he soothed the little girl as his proud, though flabbergasted father watched on.

Touga couldn't believe this days work.  When his son had come to him and told him what had happened, he'd had a hard time not falling to the ground with laughter.  It was so difficult to keep in the hysterical laughter that wanted to come out, along with the fact that the two could hardly be divorced by the son of a lawyer, when their 'marriage', performed by the son of a monk, wasn't even valid in the first place!  

He knew better than to say such a thing to his son, however, because that would just cause all sorts of havoc.  No... it was just better to pretend that this 'marriage' was the real deal, and help his son sort out the two obnoxious little boys that had started this whole episode.  The lawsuit bit had just been too good to pass up, and he'd hoped that little Naraku knew that word – which it appeared he did, from his reaction.  And even little Kouga – though not knowing that particular word, he understood 'lying' and 'parents' well enough.  

But by the gods... he was going to keep every bit of this summer in his memories, and when his uptight little son grew up, he was going to haul it out and use it to torment him anytime he started getting out of hand.  Yes... this summer was providing absolute gold in terms of blackmail...

Perhaps he should bring his camcorder to playgroup?  It would certainly be much better to have video footage rather than just memories...

And much more damaging.

He chuckled.  He could hardly wait for Sesshoumaru to grow up...

~oOo~

A/N:  Well, this one took a while, didn't it?  I just couldn't come up with any good ideas, until I was re-reading Little Sesshoumaru's First Kiss earlier, and the ridiculous idea of a devious little Naraku and divorce lawyers came into my head.  Hope everyone gets a laugh out of the insanity...

Amber