InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ The Bane of My Existence ❯ Testing the Waters ( Chapter 4 )
[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]
By: Shaeya Sedjet Namir 
Anime/Manga: InuYasha Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Romance / Hentai / Drama | Type: Alternate Universe | Uploaded On: 06.18.2007 | Updated On: 06.21.2007 | Pages: 2 | Words: 2.5K | Visits: 1.0K | Status: Work In Progress
Anime/Manga: InuYasha Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Romance / Hentai / Drama | Type: Alternate Universe | Uploaded On: 06.18.2007 | Updated On: 06.21.2007 | Pages: 2 | Words: 2.5K | Visits: 1.0K | Status: Work In Progress
Dislaimer: The characters of Inuyasha belong to Takahashi Rumiko. I just like to use them for my own nefarious purposes. Caleb, unfortunately is all mine.
The Bane of My Existence:
Chapter Four:
Testing the Waters (Revised 6-9-07)
That day in the workshop changed everything between Inuyasha and me. We had gone from enemies to tentative friends to courting in a matter of weeks. It was so bizarre. I didn’t get as much hell from Miroku as I thought I would get. He was really cool about it—totally supportive. I couldn’t believe it. I thought he would be ridiculing me for years to come about dating his best friend. I guess sometimes older brothers really do know what's best for you.
By the time all this happened, we had the carriage of the Carmen assembled. Hooray! Aside from that, the engine had been assembled and was ready to be dropped in. We were only lacking the body and that, we could do in no time. Well, relatively. Ok, so it took forever! But I got to spend quality time with a wonderful young man that I found myself entirely enchanted by. Such a wonderful feeling, that.
Wednesday night, after we had finished for the evening, we took turns in the shower and then settled in to watch The Simple Life. Stupid, I know, but it was oh so entertaining to make fun of the two very daft individuals. I just couldn’t resist. Not to mention, it gave me the opportunity to snuggle Inuyasha. We curled up on the couch with a bag of Bugles and cups of tea, and he rested his cheek against the top of my head. I still remember what it felt like to be so close to him in those first months. I felt safe and protected. I felt invincible, like nothing could harm me as long as I was there, snuggled comfortably in his arms.
It still surprises me that Inuyasha was such a gentleman. Not once did he try to take advantage of me. In fact, I was the initiator of the majority of our more intimate moments, until I became more comfortable with him. He was so patient with me. I still love him for that. I never would have thought that I would become what I became with him. The term ‘wanton’ is aptly applicable. I felt for him the way I had never (and still have not) felt for any other man.
Do you know what it is like to be with a person who makes you feel giddy with anticipation? You both try to ignore it, but the anticipatory tension is there just the same. Soon you find yourself holding your breath, waiting for the person to make the move. That’s how it was that night. Neither of us was concentrating on Paris or Nicole. We were attuned solely to each other. We were even breathing in sync.
The air was buzzing with tension, and I finally raised my head from his shoulder to study him. We sat like that for what seemed like an eternity. My eyes traced every detail of his face, committing each feature to memory. My gaze lingered on his lips, and all I could think about was how much I wanted to feel his lips pressed against mine. I settled for reaching out and tracing those lips with the tips of my fingers. They were petal- soft. I had never thought about a man's lips being soft before. It was a feature I attributed only to women. After all, when was the last time you read a romance novel in which the author lingered on "his soft, sensual lips"? Inuyasha's gaze softened and he smiled against my fingertips, kissing them softly. I could feel myself smile back, and a part of me wanted to roll my eyes.
I've never been the girl that gets all squishy and stupid inside about guys! And here was this beautiful man turning my world completely upside down. I squashed the little voice that was raging and stamping and howling in my head about the oppression of women by men. I told it to shut up. I liked this man. If that militant feminist part of me could have glared, she would have. That train of thought derailed completely as Inuyasha nibbled my fingertips.
I had never known my fingertips to be super sensitive, but when he scraped his teeth gently over the pad of my index finger, I lost my mind. Fire pooled in my belly and I was sure my brain had just liquefied and dribbled out of my ear. All I could think was, I didn't know fingertips were an erogenous zone...
I must have made quite the picture, staring at him with gaping mouth and glazed eyes. He murmured something against my fingertips, but his meaning was lost on me. All I could manage was a pathetic whimper. He took pity on me and stopped his sweet torture. I moved my hands to his brow, tracing my sensitized fingers over the slightly coarse hair there. I wanted to memorize every bit of him. I wanted to remember this moment with him for the rest of my life. I wanted to be able to take it out and snuggle it on a lonely night in the darkness and solace of my room. This was a memory I would cherish forever.
Inuyasha reached up and grasped my wrist gently in his hand. He removed it from his face and my small sound of protest was turned to a strangled squeak when he brushed his lips against the inside of my wrist. He snorted with soft laughter, but his eyes were like jewels alight with a brilliant fire that spoke more than laughter. There was dark promise in those amethyst eyes and he held my gaze as he leaned in to me.
Our lips met in the sweetest of kisses. It still gives me chills to think about it. The gentle suction of his lips, the pressure of his teeth scraping my bottom lip. I was on fire. Every nerve ending in my body sang with desire. This was entirely foreign to me. Caleb had certainly never managed to make me feel like that! I thought I would spontaneously combust, leaving nothing but a pile of ashes. He made love to my mouth, nipping at my lips, our tongues entwining in a sensuous tango. I sank my fingers through his thick, silken hair and tugged, feeling the need to have him closer to me. He complied with a very male chuckle that made me all quivery inside. I wanted nothing more than to just melt into him, become a part of him. I dragged my nails firmly down either side of his neck, forcing a low, deep growl from his throat. At that sound, I felt things tighten low in my belly—things I didn’t know were there until that very moment.
I could have stayed that way with him forever, but he broke the kiss gently. “Maybe we should slow down,” he suggested. I wanted to cry. He made me feel so…alive, and now that feeling was fading, leaving only a strange tingling in its wake. I ached at my very core at the loss of his touch. It scared me. The man was as addictive as chocolate. I was scared of how quickly and how hard I was falling for this guy. But at the same time, I knew I needed him just as the rose needs the sun thrive.
He was holding me against his chest, and he could tell that something was wrong. He craned his neck to look at me. “Hey…you ok?”
I nodded, “Yeah, I’m just…I didn’t want to stop,” I murmured softly and felt myself blushing fiercely. Me! Blushing! What a ridiculous concept! Nevertheless, it was happening, and I couldn’t hide it.
He chuckled, stroking my hair. “I think it's for the best…for now. We can work up to the bigger stuff later. I just don’t want to move too fast with you." He stroked my hair.
I knew I would be thankful for it later, but now, his caution made me weep. I sniffled and he stilled. With Caleb it had been take, take, take with no consideration for my feelings. I was at a loss. How was I supposed to respond to his concern? I wanted to hit him for pulling away; I wanted to feel every inch of him pressed against every inch of me; but most of all I wanted to believe in him. I wanted him to cure me. I began to sob harder as the conflicting emotions warred within me. And just like that, everything I had accomplished in my therapy sessions, everything I had learned in my Psych classes flew right out the window.
"Why don't you want to kiss me anymore!" I wailed, my breath hitching on every word. Great I was hyperventilating.
My breath caught in my throat as he jerked chin my up, forcing me to meet his gaze. His eyes were angry, and it confused me. "This is why we need to take it slowly, Kagome," he said firmly. "What if we were to have sex right here on this couch? You aren't ready for a step that big. You don't even know what sex is supposed to be like." His gaze softened. "I know it feels good and you want more, but I don't want to do anything you are going to regret later. I want you to be ready to make that step when we get there. I don't want it to be just an impulse that you need to satisfy. You would hate me for it, and I couldn't stand that.” He considered my for a moment, before cupping my face between his strong hands. “Kagome, please don't cry. Seeing girls cry makes me squeamy."
I laughed out loud at that and leaned my forehead against his. "Thank you." I murmured.
"No problem." His voice was serious. I looked up and he was staring down at me, "I don't want to mess this up, Kagome. I want to do this right. You deserve that."
I could feel tears pricking at the corners of my eyes. Happy tears. Perhaps this relationship wasn't doomed after all. I nodded. “Yeah, I do.”
He chuckled and kissed the tip of my nose. “Feel better?”
I nodded, snuggling against him once more, “Yeah, actually.”
He tucked me under his arm and turned his attention back to The Simple Life.
I looked up at him, “You know, you're the first guy I've been with since...”
He nodded. “I know. Miroku had the 'the talk' with me.”
I grinned. “The 'You hurt my sister and I'll break you' talk?”
Inuyasha nodded. “I would have lost a small amount of respect for him if he hadn't. I mean, any self-respecting older brother has to look out for his kid sister. And you have special circumstances. Don't worry. I'm well aware of my boundaries, but I didn't need Miroku to tell me what they were. I would have been careful with you, anyway.”
I sighed. “I'm not going to break, you know.”
“I know that, Kagome. But what kind of person would I be not to take what has happened to you into consideration. I know you've been through counseling, but it's not that easy. There are triggers I need to be aware of. The last thing I want to do is trigger some sort of flashback that is going to set our relationship back ten steps. I'm just trying to do this the right way.”
I beamed at him. Someone had paid attention to his Intro to Psych course. “I know. Thank you, Inuyasha.”
TBC...
The Bane of My Existence:
Chapter Four:
Testing the Waters (Revised 6-9-07)
That day in the workshop changed everything between Inuyasha and me. We had gone from enemies to tentative friends to courting in a matter of weeks. It was so bizarre. I didn’t get as much hell from Miroku as I thought I would get. He was really cool about it—totally supportive. I couldn’t believe it. I thought he would be ridiculing me for years to come about dating his best friend. I guess sometimes older brothers really do know what's best for you.
By the time all this happened, we had the carriage of the Carmen assembled. Hooray! Aside from that, the engine had been assembled and was ready to be dropped in. We were only lacking the body and that, we could do in no time. Well, relatively. Ok, so it took forever! But I got to spend quality time with a wonderful young man that I found myself entirely enchanted by. Such a wonderful feeling, that.
Wednesday night, after we had finished for the evening, we took turns in the shower and then settled in to watch The Simple Life. Stupid, I know, but it was oh so entertaining to make fun of the two very daft individuals. I just couldn’t resist. Not to mention, it gave me the opportunity to snuggle Inuyasha. We curled up on the couch with a bag of Bugles and cups of tea, and he rested his cheek against the top of my head. I still remember what it felt like to be so close to him in those first months. I felt safe and protected. I felt invincible, like nothing could harm me as long as I was there, snuggled comfortably in his arms.
It still surprises me that Inuyasha was such a gentleman. Not once did he try to take advantage of me. In fact, I was the initiator of the majority of our more intimate moments, until I became more comfortable with him. He was so patient with me. I still love him for that. I never would have thought that I would become what I became with him. The term ‘wanton’ is aptly applicable. I felt for him the way I had never (and still have not) felt for any other man.
Do you know what it is like to be with a person who makes you feel giddy with anticipation? You both try to ignore it, but the anticipatory tension is there just the same. Soon you find yourself holding your breath, waiting for the person to make the move. That’s how it was that night. Neither of us was concentrating on Paris or Nicole. We were attuned solely to each other. We were even breathing in sync.
The air was buzzing with tension, and I finally raised my head from his shoulder to study him. We sat like that for what seemed like an eternity. My eyes traced every detail of his face, committing each feature to memory. My gaze lingered on his lips, and all I could think about was how much I wanted to feel his lips pressed against mine. I settled for reaching out and tracing those lips with the tips of my fingers. They were petal- soft. I had never thought about a man's lips being soft before. It was a feature I attributed only to women. After all, when was the last time you read a romance novel in which the author lingered on "his soft, sensual lips"? Inuyasha's gaze softened and he smiled against my fingertips, kissing them softly. I could feel myself smile back, and a part of me wanted to roll my eyes.
I've never been the girl that gets all squishy and stupid inside about guys! And here was this beautiful man turning my world completely upside down. I squashed the little voice that was raging and stamping and howling in my head about the oppression of women by men. I told it to shut up. I liked this man. If that militant feminist part of me could have glared, she would have. That train of thought derailed completely as Inuyasha nibbled my fingertips.
I had never known my fingertips to be super sensitive, but when he scraped his teeth gently over the pad of my index finger, I lost my mind. Fire pooled in my belly and I was sure my brain had just liquefied and dribbled out of my ear. All I could think was, I didn't know fingertips were an erogenous zone...
I must have made quite the picture, staring at him with gaping mouth and glazed eyes. He murmured something against my fingertips, but his meaning was lost on me. All I could manage was a pathetic whimper. He took pity on me and stopped his sweet torture. I moved my hands to his brow, tracing my sensitized fingers over the slightly coarse hair there. I wanted to memorize every bit of him. I wanted to remember this moment with him for the rest of my life. I wanted to be able to take it out and snuggle it on a lonely night in the darkness and solace of my room. This was a memory I would cherish forever.
Inuyasha reached up and grasped my wrist gently in his hand. He removed it from his face and my small sound of protest was turned to a strangled squeak when he brushed his lips against the inside of my wrist. He snorted with soft laughter, but his eyes were like jewels alight with a brilliant fire that spoke more than laughter. There was dark promise in those amethyst eyes and he held my gaze as he leaned in to me.
Our lips met in the sweetest of kisses. It still gives me chills to think about it. The gentle suction of his lips, the pressure of his teeth scraping my bottom lip. I was on fire. Every nerve ending in my body sang with desire. This was entirely foreign to me. Caleb had certainly never managed to make me feel like that! I thought I would spontaneously combust, leaving nothing but a pile of ashes. He made love to my mouth, nipping at my lips, our tongues entwining in a sensuous tango. I sank my fingers through his thick, silken hair and tugged, feeling the need to have him closer to me. He complied with a very male chuckle that made me all quivery inside. I wanted nothing more than to just melt into him, become a part of him. I dragged my nails firmly down either side of his neck, forcing a low, deep growl from his throat. At that sound, I felt things tighten low in my belly—things I didn’t know were there until that very moment.
I could have stayed that way with him forever, but he broke the kiss gently. “Maybe we should slow down,” he suggested. I wanted to cry. He made me feel so…alive, and now that feeling was fading, leaving only a strange tingling in its wake. I ached at my very core at the loss of his touch. It scared me. The man was as addictive as chocolate. I was scared of how quickly and how hard I was falling for this guy. But at the same time, I knew I needed him just as the rose needs the sun thrive.
He was holding me against his chest, and he could tell that something was wrong. He craned his neck to look at me. “Hey…you ok?”
I nodded, “Yeah, I’m just…I didn’t want to stop,” I murmured softly and felt myself blushing fiercely. Me! Blushing! What a ridiculous concept! Nevertheless, it was happening, and I couldn’t hide it.
He chuckled, stroking my hair. “I think it's for the best…for now. We can work up to the bigger stuff later. I just don’t want to move too fast with you." He stroked my hair.
I knew I would be thankful for it later, but now, his caution made me weep. I sniffled and he stilled. With Caleb it had been take, take, take with no consideration for my feelings. I was at a loss. How was I supposed to respond to his concern? I wanted to hit him for pulling away; I wanted to feel every inch of him pressed against every inch of me; but most of all I wanted to believe in him. I wanted him to cure me. I began to sob harder as the conflicting emotions warred within me. And just like that, everything I had accomplished in my therapy sessions, everything I had learned in my Psych classes flew right out the window.
"Why don't you want to kiss me anymore!" I wailed, my breath hitching on every word. Great I was hyperventilating.
My breath caught in my throat as he jerked chin my up, forcing me to meet his gaze. His eyes were angry, and it confused me. "This is why we need to take it slowly, Kagome," he said firmly. "What if we were to have sex right here on this couch? You aren't ready for a step that big. You don't even know what sex is supposed to be like." His gaze softened. "I know it feels good and you want more, but I don't want to do anything you are going to regret later. I want you to be ready to make that step when we get there. I don't want it to be just an impulse that you need to satisfy. You would hate me for it, and I couldn't stand that.” He considered my for a moment, before cupping my face between his strong hands. “Kagome, please don't cry. Seeing girls cry makes me squeamy."
I laughed out loud at that and leaned my forehead against his. "Thank you." I murmured.
"No problem." His voice was serious. I looked up and he was staring down at me, "I don't want to mess this up, Kagome. I want to do this right. You deserve that."
I could feel tears pricking at the corners of my eyes. Happy tears. Perhaps this relationship wasn't doomed after all. I nodded. “Yeah, I do.”
He chuckled and kissed the tip of my nose. “Feel better?”
I nodded, snuggling against him once more, “Yeah, actually.”
He tucked me under his arm and turned his attention back to The Simple Life.
I looked up at him, “You know, you're the first guy I've been with since...”
He nodded. “I know. Miroku had the 'the talk' with me.”
I grinned. “The 'You hurt my sister and I'll break you' talk?”
Inuyasha nodded. “I would have lost a small amount of respect for him if he hadn't. I mean, any self-respecting older brother has to look out for his kid sister. And you have special circumstances. Don't worry. I'm well aware of my boundaries, but I didn't need Miroku to tell me what they were. I would have been careful with you, anyway.”
I sighed. “I'm not going to break, you know.”
“I know that, Kagome. But what kind of person would I be not to take what has happened to you into consideration. I know you've been through counseling, but it's not that easy. There are triggers I need to be aware of. The last thing I want to do is trigger some sort of flashback that is going to set our relationship back ten steps. I'm just trying to do this the right way.”
I beamed at him. Someone had paid attention to his Intro to Psych course. “I know. Thank you, Inuyasha.”
TBC...