InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ The Bane of My Existence ❯ Lost and Found ( Chapter 7 )
[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]
By: Shaeya Sedjet Namir 
Lemony Goodness!!!
Anime/Manga: InuYasha Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Romance / Hentai / Drama | Type: Alternate Universe | Uploaded On: 06.18.2007 | Updated On: 06.21.2007 | Pages: 6 | Words: 5.8K | Visits: 1.5K | Status: Work In Progress
Lemony Goodness!!!
Anime/Manga: InuYasha Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Romance / Hentai / Drama | Type: Alternate Universe | Uploaded On: 06.18.2007 | Updated On: 06.21.2007 | Pages: 6 | Words: 5.8K | Visits: 1.5K | Status: Work In Progress
A Note From Sedjet: Well, I know it's kinda crazy that I'm being so un-flakey with my posts lately. I'm just in the mood to write. I always seem to write better when I'm not in a relationship or when I'm having relationship issues as has been the case lately. My man decided to be douche bag and it's breathed life back into my muse. Things are better now, but my muse is still alive and kicking. Let's just hope things stay that way. I hope you enjoy the most recent installment of Bane.
Thanks to bloody knives and Steviedee for the reviews!
Disclaimer: I still don't own Inuyasha or any of his friends...except Hikari. She's completely a fabrication of my mind. Oh, and then there's Caleb. Everyone else belongs to Takahashi-san.
The Bane of My Existence
Chapter Seven:
Lost and Found
The ride to the hospital was the longest of my life. There was the feeling of impending dread. We knew what was coming. There was no escaping it. Inuyasha's mother was dying. I struggled to keep myself together. I had to keep it together for him. He needed me to be strong. I certainly didn't want to wallow in my own misery when he was the one losing his mother.
Inuyasha's hands were white as he gripped the steering wheel and the gearshift. He was scared. He was angry. What I wanted most in the world was to make it ok for him. I wanted to take it all away. Foolishly, I wished that I had the power of healing so I could give him back his mother. Stupid, I know, but when you love someone, you want to take away anything that might hurt them. I looked at his pained profile and placed my hand over his on the gearshift knob. He squeezed my hand. In that moment, there was no need for words. I knew he was thanking me for being there.
After what seemed like an eternity, we pulled into the parking garage at the hospital. He got out of the car and was at my door before I could even reach for the handle. He pulled me out of the Stingray and pressed me against the passenger side of the car. He wrapped his arms around me and buried his face in the crook of my neck. My arms came up and snaked up his back. He pulled back, looking into my eyes. He sank his fingers into my hair and kissed me. In that moment, I knew that I loved him. I knew that I would do anything to protect him. My hands came up and cupped his face, our tears mingling mixing together as we kissed. In that kiss, I tried to tell him that I loved him, that I would be there for him through every moment of this tragedy.
He pulled away reluctantly and swiped his thumb over my lips. “I guess we'd better get in there.” He leaned his forehead against mine and closed his eyes. “I don't want to, Kagome.”
“Yes you do, Inuyasha.”
He nodded and sighed. “Yeah, I do.”
I took his hand in mine. “I'll be with you.”
He kissed me briefly and wrapped me in a fierce hug. “I don't know what I'd do without you here.”
“You would be strong.”
He took a deep breath and pushed away from the car. “Ok. I think I can do this.” He held his hand out to me, and I took it. Together, we entered the hospital's Oncology unit.
We stood outside Izayoi's room while Inuyasha prepared himself. I stroked his hair helplessly.
“Inuyasha, every moment we stand out here is another moment you lose with your mom.”
He pulled me to him, kissing me fiercely, “You're a-fucking-mazing, do you know that?”
I blushed. “No, I'm just trying to be supportive.”
He shook his head, “You're amazing.”
I gave him a gentle shove toward the room and followed him in. We were greeted by the steady beeping of the lifesupport machines and Izayoi's rasping breaths. Her head turned as we entered and her eyes filled with tears of joy.
“My koInu,” she smiled. Her gaze moved to me, and her smile widened. “Kagome, thank you for being here for my son.”
“That's nonsense, Izayoi.” I went to her side and clasped her hand gently in mine. “I wouldn't miss this. Since mom's been gone, you've been a mother to me.” I bent to kiss her cheek.
Izayoi shook her head, “I've been waiting for you two to be together for years, Kagome.”
I blushed. “Izzy!”
“You are a good girl, Kagome. You are so good for my Inuyasha.”
Inuyasha moved to his mother's bedside, his arm going around my waist. Izayoi's smile widened. “Look at you two. So young and in love.” She looked over at Uncle Tai, her gaze going soft with nostalgia. “They remind me of us when we were their age, Tai.” Her gaze returned to me, and she squeezed my hand. “Please take care of my baby, Kagome. I have never seen him as happy as he's been since he has been with you.”
I nodded. “I'll do my best, Izzy.”
“I know you will, sweetie.” she murmured softly. She was tiring herself out.
Tai reached over and cover her hand with one his large hands. “You should rest, Izzy.”
“Fluffy isn't here yet,” she said in a breathy voice. Izayoi was the only person who could get away with calling Sesshoumaru “Fluffy”. It was her petname for the prissy, silver haired man and he would tolerate it only from her.
“He is on his way, Izzy.” Tai soothed.
“Can't rest until Fluffy is here.”
Not a moment later, Sesshoumaru burst through the door, his little wife Rin and their six month old Hikari in tow. The normally arrogant man knelt shamelessly by Izayoi's bedside, clutching at her hand.
“Mother,” he whispered. In all reality, Izayoi was not Sesshoumaru's mother. However, she was the closest thing he had since the death of his own mother. It was true that he had resented his stepmother and his half-brother for sometime, but he grew to love and care for them both. It was impossible not to fall in love with Izzy. Her capacity for love made her shine like a beacon and her presence soothed and healed all who were lucky enough to be loved by her.
Izayoi's face lit up. “Fluffy.”
He raised her hand to his lips, gently kissing the delicate appendage. “I'm sorry I couldn't get here sooner, Mother.”
She shook her head weakly. “You are here, that is all that matters.” She looked to Inuyasha. “Both of my boys are so grown up.” She looked at each of them with a meaningful gaze. “Take care of each other, my darlings. You only have one family.” She looked at Rin, standing shyly behind Sesshoumaru. “Rin, dear, bring me that beautiful baby girl. I would lake to hold her one last time.”
“Of course, Izayoi.” the young woman smiled through her tears.
Sesshoumaru lifted himself gracefully from the floor by his stepmother's bedside and stepped back to allow Rin access to the bed. His wife handed the tiny bundle to the proud grandmother and smiled down at her mother-in-law.
Izayoi looked up and around at her family. “I have the most wonderful family any woman could ever wish for,” she smiled. “I'll be looking down on you all.”
“Mom, don't talk like that,” Inuyasha pleaded almost desperately.
Izayoi made a tsking sound. “KoInu, I know this is difficult for you, but we must acknowledge the truth of the matter.”
Sesshoumaru placed a awkwardly comforting hand on his younger brother's shoulder.
“Fluffy, that is a sight that makes a mother proud.” She nuzzled the white fluff of Hikari's hair as she gazed lovingly up at her boys. They had never been able to show their affection for each other, so Sesshoumaru's attempt at comfort was a huge step in the right direction.
Suddenly, Izayoi's face became a mask of pain. “Rin, come take this baby girl.” Rin nodded, scooping up tiny bundle of cute and cuddling her to her chest.
Izayoi Sato looked at her soulmate. “It is time, Tai.”
Tai looked down at his wife and stroked her raven hair, smiling down into her violet eyes. He gripped her hand in his.
She looked at me and smiled sadly. “I will send your love to Michi, Souta and Kano.”
Tears pricked the corners of my eyes and I nodded. “I love you, Auntie Izzy.”
“Oh, Kagome, I love you too, sweetie!” she whispered.
Tai Sato looked up at his sons. “Boys, could you give a few moments.” His eyes said what his mouth could not. Those golden eyes pleaded with them to let him say goodbye to his love alone. He wanted to spare them the pain of watching their mother take her last breath.
Sesshoumaru nodded reluctantly and ushered Rin out ahead of him. He paused in the doorway. “Come, Inuyasha. Give them a moment.”
Inuyasha took a deep breath and knelt at his mother's bedside. “I love you, Mom,” he whispered and kissed her cheek.
“I know, my KoInu. I have never doubted it for a moment.” Her gaze slid to me and back to her son. “Take care of our Kagome. I think you have finally met your match.” She smiled, cupping his face with her free hand. “I love you, my baby. I'll be watching over you.”
“I hope I can make you proud, Mom.”
“Baby, you already have!” She smiled brightly, brushing away his tears. “No tears, KoInu. Death is a part of life. Be strong for your father. He is too proud to ask, but he will need your support.”
Inuyasha nodded wordlessly, “Goodbye, Mom.”
“It's not goodbye, KoInu.” She touched his chest with her pale, delicate hand. “I will always be right here.”
He nodded. “Hai, always.”
He stood and turned to me, offering his hand. I took it and together we walked out of the room. I closed the door behind us to give the couple a bit of privacy as they said their goodbyes. As soon as the door was closed, Inuyasha grabbed me and crushed me to him. He buried his face in the crook of my neck and inhaled deeply. I was helpless to do anything but ride the wave of his grief, so I curved an arm up to rest a hand on his shoulder blade while my other hand caressed his silken ebony hair.
I don't know how long we stood like that, but eventually he released his hold on me and moved back to look into my eyes. He cupped my face in his hand and lowered his head for a chaste kiss.
“Thank you,” he murmured softly.
“Kagome,” it was Sesshoumaru's soft, commanding voice that brought me out of my reverie.
“Sesshy,” I smiled, as he pulled me into a hug.
“I was unaware that you were dating my baka otoutou.” He teased as he let me go.
I self consciously rubbed my left shoulder, “Well, we're not really dating. We're just--”
“Friends?” Sesshoumaru raised an eyebrow, his gaze sliding to his brother. I wanted desperately to change the subject, so I turned to Rin, smiling. “It's good to see you again, Rin. I wish it was under better circumstances.”
She smiled shyly, nodding. “It's good to see you, too, Kagome. We should have you over for dinner sometime.”
I smiled, wanting the chance to get to know this shy little creature who had captured Sesshoumaru's heart. “I would love that, Rin.” I turned my attention to the six month-old child in her arms. “Hikari is growing so fast!” I reached for the child. “May I?”
“Of course, Kagome.”
I plucked the child out of her mother's arms and cradled her. “Hi, there, beautiful!” I cooed. I'd never really been big on children, but Hikari was different. She stared at me with her large, dark eyes, studying me intently.
Inuyasha wrapped an arm around my waist and peered down at the tiny girl. “Hey, Hikari.” he soothed softly. The child's eyes lit up as she recognized her uncle. Somehow, she understood that this man was a part of her family, and when he stroked her cheek with a finger, she grabbed it and held on. I looked over at him and he turned to look at me. In that moment, I knew that we would be standing like this one day holding a child of our own. I felt it with a certainty I could not explain, and I saw the same knowledge in amethyst eyes.
Sesshourmaru wrapped an arm around Rin's waist, nestling her into his side. I smiled, thinking they were a matching set. The gods had made them to go together. They were an unlikely couple, but hell! Haven't they always said that opposites attract? The were content to simply stand and watch Inuyasha and I as we entertained a very amused Hikari. Inuyasha was doing that stupid baby-talk voice that we all do when we are around babies and I found myself marveling at how tiny she was. I lifted her perfect little fingers to my mouth and nibbled at them, causing her to shriek with laughter. Inuyasha pressed a kiss against my temple and Rin and Sesshoumaru smiled at our antics. And for a short time, we were able to forget the tragedy that had brought us all together.
Moments later, Tai opened the door to Izayoi's room and reality came crashing back in on us. He lifted his eyes to meet his sons' gazes. “Her suffering has passed,” he murmured softly.
The boys went to their father, hugging him simultaneously. Tai Sato kissed both of his sons on the crown of the head, tears slipping from his toffee-gold eyes. I felt tears prick my eyes and buried my face against Hikari's pale, downy soft hair. I felt Rin's tiny hand at my hip as she hugged me, resting her chin against my shoulder. “It is ok for you to grieve, Kagome.”
I shook my head. “Not when they have lost a mother and a wife.”
“But Izayoi was like a mother to you, Kagome. You have just as much right no grieve as they do.”
“I have to be strong for Inuyasha,” I whispered.
Rin tucked a lock of hair behind my ear in her maternal way. “You can be strong and still grieve, Kagome. It's ok.”
I sniffled a bit, gazing at Rin for a very long moment. “I've often wondered how it was that you were ever a match for Sesshoumaru, and now I know. Your temperance and patience are just what he needs. Kami knows there is no one else with patience enough to put up with him!”
She laughed softly, knowing exactly what I meant. “Thank you, Kagome,” she murmured with a secret smile.
Hikari began to doze and I handed her back to her mother. She considered me for a moment. “You have a way with children, Kagome.” I shook my head, “Just that one. She incredibly well behaved and she's just so cute I can't resist her.”
Rin shook her head, “You don't give yourself enough credit, Kagome. Inuyasha is lucky to have you.”
I shrugged. “It's not like we're serious or anything.”
Her eyes twinkled, “Oh, really?”
I shook my head, “We don't even get along three quarters of the time.”
Rin smiled, “That's part and parcel of dealing with the Sato men. The can be very stubborn and bullheaded. Just be patient with him, Kagome. He cares for you or you wouldn't be here to see him at his most vulnerable time.”
With that, she went to comfort her grieving husband. I looked up right into the eyes of Inuyasha. He wore his pain for the world to see, and it drew me to him. I wanted so badly to take it away and make him smile again. As I approached, he held out an arm and I allowed him to sink into my embrace. I felt an intense gaze and looked up to meet Tai's golden gaze. He smiled sadly and mouthed a thank you to me. I couldn't fathom what all the fuss was about. This was you did when you loved someone. These people had practically been family to me my entire life. How could I not be here for them in there time of need? Didn't they know thanks was completely unnecessary?
~*~
It was not until we were at home in the sanctuary of my room that I finally let my own tears go. We held each other as we mourned for Izayoi. I knew in my heart of hearts that there would be one less star in the heavens that night. I wept for Inuyasha and his loss. I wept for Tai who had to go through the rest of his life without his soulmate. I wept for Sesshoumaru who had lost his second mother. I wept for Hikari who would never know how amazing her grandmother was.
“I'm so sorry, Inuyasha,” I whispered brokenly and he silenced me with a desperate kiss.
“I love you,” he whispered frantically against my lips as he tore at his overshirt.
“Inuyasha--”
“No talking,” he commanded as he tugged my shirt up over my head. “I need to feel you.”
I put my hand on his chest, pushing gently. He stared at me with half-crazed eyes. “Please,” he whispered.
“Inuyasha, I don't want you to regret this tomorrow.”
He shook his head, “Never.” His head swooped back down to claim my lips again, kissing me feverishly. His hands were everywhere at once and there was a heat building between us that I feared would burn me alive.
“Inuyasha, are you sure?” I panted against his neck. I wanted to be absolutely certain that he was not to regret anything we did tonight. I didn't want to be a mindless fuck for him. After all I had been through, that was not something I could handle.
He lowered his head to nip at my collarbone. “Talk too much,” he mumbled as he kissed path down my sternum to the front clasp of my bra. He undid the clasp with his teeth and peeled the bra away from my breasts. “Gods, Kagome,” he breathed, his eyes darting up to my face. He lowered his head to lick the valley between my breasts and I bit my lip. His hands came up to cup the heavy weight of my breasts and I moaned. His touch was so gentle. I'd never experienced anything like it. He took a nipple between the thumb and forefinger of each hand and applied a gentle pressure as he twisted carefully. My head went back and I arched into him, my mouth opening on a sharp cry. The sensation was like nothing I had ever felt and it sent a jolt of sensation directly from my nipples to my sex.
He looked up at me and his voice brought me back to him. “I want you to watch me, Kagome,” he commanded. How could I refuse him when he was touching me like that and looking at me as if he were laying claim to me. There was something so erotic about seeing his dark head lowered to my breast as his mouth closed over one dark nipple. The ache between my legs was growing unbearable and I writhed beneath him, trying find release. I sank my fingers into his hair as I watched him nip and suck at my nipple and I felt him smile against my breast. His hand closed over my neglected left breast and his fingers gently pinched and twisted the nipple until hardened, puckering at his touch. His teeth tore a squeal from lips as he gently pulled my nipple between them, scraping along the sensitized flesh. Once he was satisfied with his work, he paid reverence to my left breast in the same manner, his left hand gently squeezing my right breast.
He rolled his eyes up to meet mine, his possessive gaze sending a shiver down my spine. Smirking against my breast, he sucked hard on my nipple, tugging slightly with his lips. His actions caused my spine to bow further and left me panting helplessly.
I could feel the moisture between my legs and began to whimper as the ache became nearly unbearable. Inuyasha crawled back up my body, his black hair creating a curtain around us. “I know it aches, baby, but I can make you feel so good.” He lowered his head to kiss me and I clung to him helplessly.
He raised up and I began to weep at the loss of him. His hands deftly rid me of my jeans and he sucked in a breath. “You are beautiful, Kagome.” His eyes met mine, shining with pride and love. He returned his attention back to the task at hand, hooking his fingers into my lacy, black boyshorts and peeling them off of my body. He sat back on his heels, just staring at me. I began to feel self conscious and tried to cover myself with my arms, but he wouldn't let me.
“You have nothing to be ashamed of, Kagome. You are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen.”
“I'm not ashamed!” I retorted crossly. “You just keep staring at me and it's making me nervous!” That made him laugh and he bent to kiss my lips.
“I love you, Kagome,” he said as he pulled away to look into my eyes. I felt tears once again pricking at the corners of my eyes. “I love you, too, KoInu.”
Inuyasha growled possessively at the term of endearment and kissed me fiercely. He trailed a path of kisses from my lips, down my neck, over my breasts to my belly. He paused to dip his tongue into my naval and tongue the kitty barbel that nestle within. His gaze moved to my face to make sure I was watching as he spread my legs. My breath caught in my throat as his tongue darted out to taste my sex. He closed his eyes for a moment, inhaling and when he opened them, his eyes were clouded with passion. He parted me gently with his fingers and his tongue found my clit. It was already highly sensitive from the rest of our foreplay and the gentle caress his tongue was almost enough to send me over the edge. It caused me to cry out, thrusting my hips into his face.
“Patience, koishii,” he murmured against my sex, and he licked it from bottom to top. The action tore his name from my lips and he began to feast with lips, teeth and tongue on my sex. He paid diligent attention to the tiny bundle of nerves that was my source of pleasure and pain. I sank my hands into his hair as his tongue delivered sweet torture. As the intensity built, I began to chant his name as a mantra. My entire body tensed and I was thrown over a great precipice into a world of blinding white pleasure. I cried out his name as the explosion hit and I felt him crawl back up my body as I started to drift back to earth.
I began to weep at the beauty of what had just occurred. It was my first orgasm and it was beautiful! Inuyasha wrapped me in his arms and tucked me tightly to hide, stroking my hair. He was very tense and very silent for a very long time. When he finally spoke to me, it was with a quiet fury.
“You've never had an orgasm.” It was a statement, not a question.
I shook my head, avoiding his gaze. Sex had never been anything but pain and humiliation for me.
He held me tightly, breathing erratically. “Gods, Kagome! How could he have you and not worship you?” He tilted my chin up and kissed me tenderly. He rolled me onto my back, his gaze searching my face. “I'll never do that to you, Kagome. I love you.” I considered my options. My first orgasm had been incredible. If he could make intercourse feel anything like that, I would be a more than willing pupil. My hands flew to his belt and I clawed frantically at it, trying to remove the last few barriers between us.
His expression was one of pleasant surprise, and his hands covered mine, stilling their progress. “Are you ready?”
I rolled my eyes, “If I weren't ready, would I be reaching for your belt buckle?”
He laughed, ripping the belt out of his beltloops and tossing it over his shoulder. He rose from his kneeling position and shucked off his jeans and boxers. I could only stare. I knew his body was glorious. I'd seen him without his shirt enough times to know that much. Somehow, seeing the complete package really hit it home for me. I was dating a sex god! My eyes trailed down his body and stopped at his ginormous manhood. Granted, my experience with the male anatomy was limited to Caleb and changing Souta's diapers, but Inuyasha put Caleb to shame. My only thought was, “Gods, how is that going to fit?!” I didn't realize I'd said it out loud until Inuyasha chuckled and sank back down to the bed and murmured in my ear. “Oh, it will fit, Kagome.”
I blushed and my entire body went red. I shut my eyes, beyond embarrassed. I wanted to crawl under a rock and die. But Inuyasha wasn't going to let that happen. He cupped my face in his hands, causing my eyes to go wide with curiosity. He looked me straight in the eye, “And here I was worried I couldn't compete.” Hi violet eyes twinkled with mischief and I pulled him down for a kiss.
I reached between us and grasped his cock in my hand and he tore away from my mouth to look into my eyes. I was determined not to be scared. I wanted him, and I was not about to deny myself the first man I had ever felt true passion for. I stroked my hand up his shaft and his head fell back, my name uttered from his lips like a prayer. He let his head fall forward as I continued my curious stroking.
“Woman, you'll be the death of me!” he groaned, his hips gently thrusting into my stroking hand. His hand went to my wrist to still his movements. “I'm not going to come in your hand like a prepubescent boy.”
Something in his voice made me shiver and I felt the familiar heat pool between my legs. He reached between us, stroking me until I was slick and wet and panting. He positioned himself at my entrance, his gaze never leaving mine. As he pushed into me, my back arched. This was completely different than anything I had experienced with Caleb. The movements weren't forced and painful. I thought I would die from the sensation of being filled with him.
“Are you alright, Koi?” he asked softly.
I nodded, licking my lips and moving my hips experimentally. He groaned, his head falling back as he pulled back and slid back into me. I watched him with wide eyes as he undulated his hips. This time, he rubbed a place inside me that forced a cry from lips. His eyes shot open and his gaze flew to my face.
“Was that an ok sound?”
I smiled lazily. “That was a very ok sound.” My voice sounded sultry even to my ears, and Inuyasha's eyes widened a fraction before his features settled into a lazy smirk.
“You liked that, didn't you?” I bit my lip and nodded as he repeated the movement. I rolled my hips up to meet his thrusts, and he growled appreciatively. He began to thrust with more force and my eyes rolled back into my skull. He lowered himself to his elbows, cupping my face in his hands. “Don't leave me,” he murmured with a smirk as he pumped into me just a bit harder.
I opened my eyes to meet his gaze and had to fight closing my eyes and his slammed into me to the hilt. His name came out on a long, ragged moan and he kissed me, our tongues mimicking the actions of our bodies. As we kissed, his speed and the force of his thrusts increased. He reached between us with one hand to rub my swollen, sensitive clit while supporting his weight with his opposite arm.
“Come with me, baby,” he groaned, his thumb making firm, deliberate circles on my clit. That and the force at which he pounded into me was enough to send me screaming over the edge. My walls contracted around him and his eyes found mine. Together, we crashed over the edge, reaching for supreme ecstasy. He shouted his release in the form of my name and I felt him release himself inside me. He collapsed on top of me, panting heavily.
“Gods, Kagome! That was incredible,” he murmured breathlessly.
I stroked his hair and nodded dazedly. “I didn't know it could feel like that.”
Inuyasha raised his head and his eyes were angry. “That motherfucker,” he growled. “We should have fucking killed him.”
I shook my head. “He's not worth the effort. I'm just glad he doesn't remember who I am.”
“I'll never treat you like that, Kagome.” He kissed me softly. “I promise I'll take care of you.”
I frowned, “I don't need to be taken care of, Inuyasha.”
“Now is not the time to get defensive and pissy, Kagome.”
“Why not?”
“Because fighting with you makes me really horny and I don't have the energy to do this again.”
That caught me off guard and I laughed out loud. Inuyasha groaned, clenching his eyes shut, and I thought something was wrong. “Inu, what's wrong.”
He chuckled. “When you laughed, your pussy was squeezing my cock.” He bit his lip, looking at me like I was the cream and he was the cat. “Maybe I do have the energy to do it again.”
I felt him harden inside of me and I knew I was going to be lucky if I could walk the next day.
Inuyasha leaned over me and murmured into my ear, “The first time was about loving you. This time, it's gonna be straight up fucking.”
His words made me hot, and I looked up at him, meeting the challenge. “What are you waiting for, KoInu,” I purred and claimed my lips with a bruising kiss, rocking his hips against mine.
“I love you,” he whispered against my lips.
“I love you, too, Inuyasha.”
TBC...
Author's Note: Wow. I think I got a little carried away there. Yay! for my longest chapter ever! I hope I made you proud, minna!
A special thanks to Cwillia, Genie_666 and Amarylis Embers for notifying me about the formatting issue!
Thanks to bloody knives and Steviedee for the reviews!
Disclaimer: I still don't own Inuyasha or any of his friends...except Hikari. She's completely a fabrication of my mind. Oh, and then there's Caleb. Everyone else belongs to Takahashi-san.
The Bane of My Existence
Chapter Seven:
Lost and Found
The ride to the hospital was the longest of my life. There was the feeling of impending dread. We knew what was coming. There was no escaping it. Inuyasha's mother was dying. I struggled to keep myself together. I had to keep it together for him. He needed me to be strong. I certainly didn't want to wallow in my own misery when he was the one losing his mother.
Inuyasha's hands were white as he gripped the steering wheel and the gearshift. He was scared. He was angry. What I wanted most in the world was to make it ok for him. I wanted to take it all away. Foolishly, I wished that I had the power of healing so I could give him back his mother. Stupid, I know, but when you love someone, you want to take away anything that might hurt them. I looked at his pained profile and placed my hand over his on the gearshift knob. He squeezed my hand. In that moment, there was no need for words. I knew he was thanking me for being there.
After what seemed like an eternity, we pulled into the parking garage at the hospital. He got out of the car and was at my door before I could even reach for the handle. He pulled me out of the Stingray and pressed me against the passenger side of the car. He wrapped his arms around me and buried his face in the crook of my neck. My arms came up and snaked up his back. He pulled back, looking into my eyes. He sank his fingers into my hair and kissed me. In that moment, I knew that I loved him. I knew that I would do anything to protect him. My hands came up and cupped his face, our tears mingling mixing together as we kissed. In that kiss, I tried to tell him that I loved him, that I would be there for him through every moment of this tragedy.
He pulled away reluctantly and swiped his thumb over my lips. “I guess we'd better get in there.” He leaned his forehead against mine and closed his eyes. “I don't want to, Kagome.”
“Yes you do, Inuyasha.”
He nodded and sighed. “Yeah, I do.”
I took his hand in mine. “I'll be with you.”
He kissed me briefly and wrapped me in a fierce hug. “I don't know what I'd do without you here.”
“You would be strong.”
He took a deep breath and pushed away from the car. “Ok. I think I can do this.” He held his hand out to me, and I took it. Together, we entered the hospital's Oncology unit.
We stood outside Izayoi's room while Inuyasha prepared himself. I stroked his hair helplessly.
“Inuyasha, every moment we stand out here is another moment you lose with your mom.”
He pulled me to him, kissing me fiercely, “You're a-fucking-mazing, do you know that?”
I blushed. “No, I'm just trying to be supportive.”
He shook his head, “You're amazing.”
I gave him a gentle shove toward the room and followed him in. We were greeted by the steady beeping of the lifesupport machines and Izayoi's rasping breaths. Her head turned as we entered and her eyes filled with tears of joy.
“My koInu,” she smiled. Her gaze moved to me, and her smile widened. “Kagome, thank you for being here for my son.”
“That's nonsense, Izayoi.” I went to her side and clasped her hand gently in mine. “I wouldn't miss this. Since mom's been gone, you've been a mother to me.” I bent to kiss her cheek.
Izayoi shook her head, “I've been waiting for you two to be together for years, Kagome.”
I blushed. “Izzy!”
“You are a good girl, Kagome. You are so good for my Inuyasha.”
Inuyasha moved to his mother's bedside, his arm going around my waist. Izayoi's smile widened. “Look at you two. So young and in love.” She looked over at Uncle Tai, her gaze going soft with nostalgia. “They remind me of us when we were their age, Tai.” Her gaze returned to me, and she squeezed my hand. “Please take care of my baby, Kagome. I have never seen him as happy as he's been since he has been with you.”
I nodded. “I'll do my best, Izzy.”
“I know you will, sweetie.” she murmured softly. She was tiring herself out.
Tai reached over and cover her hand with one his large hands. “You should rest, Izzy.”
“Fluffy isn't here yet,” she said in a breathy voice. Izayoi was the only person who could get away with calling Sesshoumaru “Fluffy”. It was her petname for the prissy, silver haired man and he would tolerate it only from her.
“He is on his way, Izzy.” Tai soothed.
“Can't rest until Fluffy is here.”
Not a moment later, Sesshoumaru burst through the door, his little wife Rin and their six month old Hikari in tow. The normally arrogant man knelt shamelessly by Izayoi's bedside, clutching at her hand.
“Mother,” he whispered. In all reality, Izayoi was not Sesshoumaru's mother. However, she was the closest thing he had since the death of his own mother. It was true that he had resented his stepmother and his half-brother for sometime, but he grew to love and care for them both. It was impossible not to fall in love with Izzy. Her capacity for love made her shine like a beacon and her presence soothed and healed all who were lucky enough to be loved by her.
Izayoi's face lit up. “Fluffy.”
He raised her hand to his lips, gently kissing the delicate appendage. “I'm sorry I couldn't get here sooner, Mother.”
She shook her head weakly. “You are here, that is all that matters.” She looked to Inuyasha. “Both of my boys are so grown up.” She looked at each of them with a meaningful gaze. “Take care of each other, my darlings. You only have one family.” She looked at Rin, standing shyly behind Sesshoumaru. “Rin, dear, bring me that beautiful baby girl. I would lake to hold her one last time.”
“Of course, Izayoi.” the young woman smiled through her tears.
Sesshoumaru lifted himself gracefully from the floor by his stepmother's bedside and stepped back to allow Rin access to the bed. His wife handed the tiny bundle to the proud grandmother and smiled down at her mother-in-law.
Izayoi looked up and around at her family. “I have the most wonderful family any woman could ever wish for,” she smiled. “I'll be looking down on you all.”
“Mom, don't talk like that,” Inuyasha pleaded almost desperately.
Izayoi made a tsking sound. “KoInu, I know this is difficult for you, but we must acknowledge the truth of the matter.”
Sesshoumaru placed a awkwardly comforting hand on his younger brother's shoulder.
“Fluffy, that is a sight that makes a mother proud.” She nuzzled the white fluff of Hikari's hair as she gazed lovingly up at her boys. They had never been able to show their affection for each other, so Sesshoumaru's attempt at comfort was a huge step in the right direction.
Suddenly, Izayoi's face became a mask of pain. “Rin, come take this baby girl.” Rin nodded, scooping up tiny bundle of cute and cuddling her to her chest.
Izayoi Sato looked at her soulmate. “It is time, Tai.”
Tai looked down at his wife and stroked her raven hair, smiling down into her violet eyes. He gripped her hand in his.
She looked at me and smiled sadly. “I will send your love to Michi, Souta and Kano.”
Tears pricked the corners of my eyes and I nodded. “I love you, Auntie Izzy.”
“Oh, Kagome, I love you too, sweetie!” she whispered.
Tai Sato looked up at his sons. “Boys, could you give a few moments.” His eyes said what his mouth could not. Those golden eyes pleaded with them to let him say goodbye to his love alone. He wanted to spare them the pain of watching their mother take her last breath.
Sesshoumaru nodded reluctantly and ushered Rin out ahead of him. He paused in the doorway. “Come, Inuyasha. Give them a moment.”
Inuyasha took a deep breath and knelt at his mother's bedside. “I love you, Mom,” he whispered and kissed her cheek.
“I know, my KoInu. I have never doubted it for a moment.” Her gaze slid to me and back to her son. “Take care of our Kagome. I think you have finally met your match.” She smiled, cupping his face with her free hand. “I love you, my baby. I'll be watching over you.”
“I hope I can make you proud, Mom.”
“Baby, you already have!” She smiled brightly, brushing away his tears. “No tears, KoInu. Death is a part of life. Be strong for your father. He is too proud to ask, but he will need your support.”
Inuyasha nodded wordlessly, “Goodbye, Mom.”
“It's not goodbye, KoInu.” She touched his chest with her pale, delicate hand. “I will always be right here.”
He nodded. “Hai, always.”
He stood and turned to me, offering his hand. I took it and together we walked out of the room. I closed the door behind us to give the couple a bit of privacy as they said their goodbyes. As soon as the door was closed, Inuyasha grabbed me and crushed me to him. He buried his face in the crook of my neck and inhaled deeply. I was helpless to do anything but ride the wave of his grief, so I curved an arm up to rest a hand on his shoulder blade while my other hand caressed his silken ebony hair.
I don't know how long we stood like that, but eventually he released his hold on me and moved back to look into my eyes. He cupped my face in his hand and lowered his head for a chaste kiss.
“Thank you,” he murmured softly.
“Kagome,” it was Sesshoumaru's soft, commanding voice that brought me out of my reverie.
“Sesshy,” I smiled, as he pulled me into a hug.
“I was unaware that you were dating my baka otoutou.” He teased as he let me go.
I self consciously rubbed my left shoulder, “Well, we're not really dating. We're just--”
“Friends?” Sesshoumaru raised an eyebrow, his gaze sliding to his brother. I wanted desperately to change the subject, so I turned to Rin, smiling. “It's good to see you again, Rin. I wish it was under better circumstances.”
She smiled shyly, nodding. “It's good to see you, too, Kagome. We should have you over for dinner sometime.”
I smiled, wanting the chance to get to know this shy little creature who had captured Sesshoumaru's heart. “I would love that, Rin.” I turned my attention to the six month-old child in her arms. “Hikari is growing so fast!” I reached for the child. “May I?”
“Of course, Kagome.”
I plucked the child out of her mother's arms and cradled her. “Hi, there, beautiful!” I cooed. I'd never really been big on children, but Hikari was different. She stared at me with her large, dark eyes, studying me intently.
Inuyasha wrapped an arm around my waist and peered down at the tiny girl. “Hey, Hikari.” he soothed softly. The child's eyes lit up as she recognized her uncle. Somehow, she understood that this man was a part of her family, and when he stroked her cheek with a finger, she grabbed it and held on. I looked over at him and he turned to look at me. In that moment, I knew that we would be standing like this one day holding a child of our own. I felt it with a certainty I could not explain, and I saw the same knowledge in amethyst eyes.
Sesshourmaru wrapped an arm around Rin's waist, nestling her into his side. I smiled, thinking they were a matching set. The gods had made them to go together. They were an unlikely couple, but hell! Haven't they always said that opposites attract? The were content to simply stand and watch Inuyasha and I as we entertained a very amused Hikari. Inuyasha was doing that stupid baby-talk voice that we all do when we are around babies and I found myself marveling at how tiny she was. I lifted her perfect little fingers to my mouth and nibbled at them, causing her to shriek with laughter. Inuyasha pressed a kiss against my temple and Rin and Sesshoumaru smiled at our antics. And for a short time, we were able to forget the tragedy that had brought us all together.
Moments later, Tai opened the door to Izayoi's room and reality came crashing back in on us. He lifted his eyes to meet his sons' gazes. “Her suffering has passed,” he murmured softly.
The boys went to their father, hugging him simultaneously. Tai Sato kissed both of his sons on the crown of the head, tears slipping from his toffee-gold eyes. I felt tears prick my eyes and buried my face against Hikari's pale, downy soft hair. I felt Rin's tiny hand at my hip as she hugged me, resting her chin against my shoulder. “It is ok for you to grieve, Kagome.”
I shook my head. “Not when they have lost a mother and a wife.”
“But Izayoi was like a mother to you, Kagome. You have just as much right no grieve as they do.”
“I have to be strong for Inuyasha,” I whispered.
Rin tucked a lock of hair behind my ear in her maternal way. “You can be strong and still grieve, Kagome. It's ok.”
I sniffled a bit, gazing at Rin for a very long moment. “I've often wondered how it was that you were ever a match for Sesshoumaru, and now I know. Your temperance and patience are just what he needs. Kami knows there is no one else with patience enough to put up with him!”
She laughed softly, knowing exactly what I meant. “Thank you, Kagome,” she murmured with a secret smile.
Hikari began to doze and I handed her back to her mother. She considered me for a moment. “You have a way with children, Kagome.” I shook my head, “Just that one. She incredibly well behaved and she's just so cute I can't resist her.”
Rin shook her head, “You don't give yourself enough credit, Kagome. Inuyasha is lucky to have you.”
I shrugged. “It's not like we're serious or anything.”
Her eyes twinkled, “Oh, really?”
I shook my head, “We don't even get along three quarters of the time.”
Rin smiled, “That's part and parcel of dealing with the Sato men. The can be very stubborn and bullheaded. Just be patient with him, Kagome. He cares for you or you wouldn't be here to see him at his most vulnerable time.”
With that, she went to comfort her grieving husband. I looked up right into the eyes of Inuyasha. He wore his pain for the world to see, and it drew me to him. I wanted so badly to take it away and make him smile again. As I approached, he held out an arm and I allowed him to sink into my embrace. I felt an intense gaze and looked up to meet Tai's golden gaze. He smiled sadly and mouthed a thank you to me. I couldn't fathom what all the fuss was about. This was you did when you loved someone. These people had practically been family to me my entire life. How could I not be here for them in there time of need? Didn't they know thanks was completely unnecessary?
~*~
It was not until we were at home in the sanctuary of my room that I finally let my own tears go. We held each other as we mourned for Izayoi. I knew in my heart of hearts that there would be one less star in the heavens that night. I wept for Inuyasha and his loss. I wept for Tai who had to go through the rest of his life without his soulmate. I wept for Sesshoumaru who had lost his second mother. I wept for Hikari who would never know how amazing her grandmother was.
“I'm so sorry, Inuyasha,” I whispered brokenly and he silenced me with a desperate kiss.
“I love you,” he whispered frantically against my lips as he tore at his overshirt.
“Inuyasha--”
“No talking,” he commanded as he tugged my shirt up over my head. “I need to feel you.”
I put my hand on his chest, pushing gently. He stared at me with half-crazed eyes. “Please,” he whispered.
“Inuyasha, I don't want you to regret this tomorrow.”
He shook his head, “Never.” His head swooped back down to claim my lips again, kissing me feverishly. His hands were everywhere at once and there was a heat building between us that I feared would burn me alive.
“Inuyasha, are you sure?” I panted against his neck. I wanted to be absolutely certain that he was not to regret anything we did tonight. I didn't want to be a mindless fuck for him. After all I had been through, that was not something I could handle.
He lowered his head to nip at my collarbone. “Talk too much,” he mumbled as he kissed path down my sternum to the front clasp of my bra. He undid the clasp with his teeth and peeled the bra away from my breasts. “Gods, Kagome,” he breathed, his eyes darting up to my face. He lowered his head to lick the valley between my breasts and I bit my lip. His hands came up to cup the heavy weight of my breasts and I moaned. His touch was so gentle. I'd never experienced anything like it. He took a nipple between the thumb and forefinger of each hand and applied a gentle pressure as he twisted carefully. My head went back and I arched into him, my mouth opening on a sharp cry. The sensation was like nothing I had ever felt and it sent a jolt of sensation directly from my nipples to my sex.
He looked up at me and his voice brought me back to him. “I want you to watch me, Kagome,” he commanded. How could I refuse him when he was touching me like that and looking at me as if he were laying claim to me. There was something so erotic about seeing his dark head lowered to my breast as his mouth closed over one dark nipple. The ache between my legs was growing unbearable and I writhed beneath him, trying find release. I sank my fingers into his hair as I watched him nip and suck at my nipple and I felt him smile against my breast. His hand closed over my neglected left breast and his fingers gently pinched and twisted the nipple until hardened, puckering at his touch. His teeth tore a squeal from lips as he gently pulled my nipple between them, scraping along the sensitized flesh. Once he was satisfied with his work, he paid reverence to my left breast in the same manner, his left hand gently squeezing my right breast.
He rolled his eyes up to meet mine, his possessive gaze sending a shiver down my spine. Smirking against my breast, he sucked hard on my nipple, tugging slightly with his lips. His actions caused my spine to bow further and left me panting helplessly.
I could feel the moisture between my legs and began to whimper as the ache became nearly unbearable. Inuyasha crawled back up my body, his black hair creating a curtain around us. “I know it aches, baby, but I can make you feel so good.” He lowered his head to kiss me and I clung to him helplessly.
He raised up and I began to weep at the loss of him. His hands deftly rid me of my jeans and he sucked in a breath. “You are beautiful, Kagome.” His eyes met mine, shining with pride and love. He returned his attention back to the task at hand, hooking his fingers into my lacy, black boyshorts and peeling them off of my body. He sat back on his heels, just staring at me. I began to feel self conscious and tried to cover myself with my arms, but he wouldn't let me.
“You have nothing to be ashamed of, Kagome. You are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen.”
“I'm not ashamed!” I retorted crossly. “You just keep staring at me and it's making me nervous!” That made him laugh and he bent to kiss my lips.
“I love you, Kagome,” he said as he pulled away to look into my eyes. I felt tears once again pricking at the corners of my eyes. “I love you, too, KoInu.”
Inuyasha growled possessively at the term of endearment and kissed me fiercely. He trailed a path of kisses from my lips, down my neck, over my breasts to my belly. He paused to dip his tongue into my naval and tongue the kitty barbel that nestle within. His gaze moved to my face to make sure I was watching as he spread my legs. My breath caught in my throat as his tongue darted out to taste my sex. He closed his eyes for a moment, inhaling and when he opened them, his eyes were clouded with passion. He parted me gently with his fingers and his tongue found my clit. It was already highly sensitive from the rest of our foreplay and the gentle caress his tongue was almost enough to send me over the edge. It caused me to cry out, thrusting my hips into his face.
“Patience, koishii,” he murmured against my sex, and he licked it from bottom to top. The action tore his name from my lips and he began to feast with lips, teeth and tongue on my sex. He paid diligent attention to the tiny bundle of nerves that was my source of pleasure and pain. I sank my hands into his hair as his tongue delivered sweet torture. As the intensity built, I began to chant his name as a mantra. My entire body tensed and I was thrown over a great precipice into a world of blinding white pleasure. I cried out his name as the explosion hit and I felt him crawl back up my body as I started to drift back to earth.
I began to weep at the beauty of what had just occurred. It was my first orgasm and it was beautiful! Inuyasha wrapped me in his arms and tucked me tightly to hide, stroking my hair. He was very tense and very silent for a very long time. When he finally spoke to me, it was with a quiet fury.
“You've never had an orgasm.” It was a statement, not a question.
I shook my head, avoiding his gaze. Sex had never been anything but pain and humiliation for me.
He held me tightly, breathing erratically. “Gods, Kagome! How could he have you and not worship you?” He tilted my chin up and kissed me tenderly. He rolled me onto my back, his gaze searching my face. “I'll never do that to you, Kagome. I love you.” I considered my options. My first orgasm had been incredible. If he could make intercourse feel anything like that, I would be a more than willing pupil. My hands flew to his belt and I clawed frantically at it, trying to remove the last few barriers between us.
His expression was one of pleasant surprise, and his hands covered mine, stilling their progress. “Are you ready?”
I rolled my eyes, “If I weren't ready, would I be reaching for your belt buckle?”
He laughed, ripping the belt out of his beltloops and tossing it over his shoulder. He rose from his kneeling position and shucked off his jeans and boxers. I could only stare. I knew his body was glorious. I'd seen him without his shirt enough times to know that much. Somehow, seeing the complete package really hit it home for me. I was dating a sex god! My eyes trailed down his body and stopped at his ginormous manhood. Granted, my experience with the male anatomy was limited to Caleb and changing Souta's diapers, but Inuyasha put Caleb to shame. My only thought was, “Gods, how is that going to fit?!” I didn't realize I'd said it out loud until Inuyasha chuckled and sank back down to the bed and murmured in my ear. “Oh, it will fit, Kagome.”
I blushed and my entire body went red. I shut my eyes, beyond embarrassed. I wanted to crawl under a rock and die. But Inuyasha wasn't going to let that happen. He cupped my face in his hands, causing my eyes to go wide with curiosity. He looked me straight in the eye, “And here I was worried I couldn't compete.” Hi violet eyes twinkled with mischief and I pulled him down for a kiss.
I reached between us and grasped his cock in my hand and he tore away from my mouth to look into my eyes. I was determined not to be scared. I wanted him, and I was not about to deny myself the first man I had ever felt true passion for. I stroked my hand up his shaft and his head fell back, my name uttered from his lips like a prayer. He let his head fall forward as I continued my curious stroking.
“Woman, you'll be the death of me!” he groaned, his hips gently thrusting into my stroking hand. His hand went to my wrist to still his movements. “I'm not going to come in your hand like a prepubescent boy.”
Something in his voice made me shiver and I felt the familiar heat pool between my legs. He reached between us, stroking me until I was slick and wet and panting. He positioned himself at my entrance, his gaze never leaving mine. As he pushed into me, my back arched. This was completely different than anything I had experienced with Caleb. The movements weren't forced and painful. I thought I would die from the sensation of being filled with him.
“Are you alright, Koi?” he asked softly.
I nodded, licking my lips and moving my hips experimentally. He groaned, his head falling back as he pulled back and slid back into me. I watched him with wide eyes as he undulated his hips. This time, he rubbed a place inside me that forced a cry from lips. His eyes shot open and his gaze flew to my face.
“Was that an ok sound?”
I smiled lazily. “That was a very ok sound.” My voice sounded sultry even to my ears, and Inuyasha's eyes widened a fraction before his features settled into a lazy smirk.
“You liked that, didn't you?” I bit my lip and nodded as he repeated the movement. I rolled my hips up to meet his thrusts, and he growled appreciatively. He began to thrust with more force and my eyes rolled back into my skull. He lowered himself to his elbows, cupping my face in his hands. “Don't leave me,” he murmured with a smirk as he pumped into me just a bit harder.
I opened my eyes to meet his gaze and had to fight closing my eyes and his slammed into me to the hilt. His name came out on a long, ragged moan and he kissed me, our tongues mimicking the actions of our bodies. As we kissed, his speed and the force of his thrusts increased. He reached between us with one hand to rub my swollen, sensitive clit while supporting his weight with his opposite arm.
“Come with me, baby,” he groaned, his thumb making firm, deliberate circles on my clit. That and the force at which he pounded into me was enough to send me screaming over the edge. My walls contracted around him and his eyes found mine. Together, we crashed over the edge, reaching for supreme ecstasy. He shouted his release in the form of my name and I felt him release himself inside me. He collapsed on top of me, panting heavily.
“Gods, Kagome! That was incredible,” he murmured breathlessly.
I stroked his hair and nodded dazedly. “I didn't know it could feel like that.”
Inuyasha raised his head and his eyes were angry. “That motherfucker,” he growled. “We should have fucking killed him.”
I shook my head. “He's not worth the effort. I'm just glad he doesn't remember who I am.”
“I'll never treat you like that, Kagome.” He kissed me softly. “I promise I'll take care of you.”
I frowned, “I don't need to be taken care of, Inuyasha.”
“Now is not the time to get defensive and pissy, Kagome.”
“Why not?”
“Because fighting with you makes me really horny and I don't have the energy to do this again.”
That caught me off guard and I laughed out loud. Inuyasha groaned, clenching his eyes shut, and I thought something was wrong. “Inu, what's wrong.”
He chuckled. “When you laughed, your pussy was squeezing my cock.” He bit his lip, looking at me like I was the cream and he was the cat. “Maybe I do have the energy to do it again.”
I felt him harden inside of me and I knew I was going to be lucky if I could walk the next day.
Inuyasha leaned over me and murmured into my ear, “The first time was about loving you. This time, it's gonna be straight up fucking.”
His words made me hot, and I looked up at him, meeting the challenge. “What are you waiting for, KoInu,” I purred and claimed my lips with a bruising kiss, rocking his hips against mine.
“I love you,” he whispered against my lips.
“I love you, too, Inuyasha.”
TBC...
Author's Note: Wow. I think I got a little carried away there. Yay! for my longest chapter ever! I hope I made you proud, minna!
A special thanks to Cwillia, Genie_666 and Amarylis Embers for notifying me about the formatting issue!