InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ The Demons Within Us ❯ Just a Sex Thing ( Chapter 7 )

Kagome shut her eyes and steadied her breath. She wasn't ready to go in there. From outside the doors she could hear her band mates tune their instruments and talk inside the warehouse. More specifically she could hear him ordering them around. The very man she couldn't stop thinking about and didn't want to stop thinking about, especially after that night.

 

She sighed.

 

It was only three days until the War of the Bands first competition, and six days from when InuYasha had kissed her.

 

She pressed her fingers unconsciously to her lips. She could almost taste the tangy spice of his mouth and the warm softness of his tongue. It was the most sensual experience she had ever had. He was slow, gentle and so needing of her. She could almost feel him pleading for her body and soul to envelop him in that kiss, and it terrified her to know she would have given them. That is until he broke away and laughed at her. It just about tore her apart. She couldn't understand what he was playing or why. But she knew it was a dangerous game, and she wasn't about to be the pawn.

 

She mentally shook her head. No, she could not let that kiss manipulate her. Whatever it may have been, or what she thought it was, it could not be what either of them wanted. She couldn't let one kiss govern her resolve. Whatever the kiss was, it was in the past. Yes, it was just a matter of moving on and letting what was be, and making sure it never happened again.

 

If only it were that easy, Kagome's shoulders slumped.

 

Because it wasn't the only time he tried to kiss her.

 

***Flashback

 

After the concert at E.Z. they had begun to pack up the van. As Kagome was heading back to the stage, her hand was roughly grabbed and she was pulled against a hard chest. Looking up, she was startled to see InuYasha's eyes looking so hungrily down at her. She tried to pull away, but he tugged her further back behind the stage curtain, and away from prying eyes.

 

“Keh. You didn't fuck up tonight. I just might keep you around.” His breath was warm as it caressed her face.

 

She just nodded and again tried to pull away, but his arms wrapped firmly around her back, and closer to his warm body. She shivered slightly at his touch and couldn't help but breath him in. He smelled tangy and so inviting. It took all she had to not close her eyes and lean into him.

 

“I was giving you a compliment.” He growled huskily. “Aren't you going to thank me?” His mouth descended to hers but she quickly looked away, making his lips fall to her flushed cheek.

 

“Thank you, InuYasha. I'm glad I made you happy.” She smiled up at him; thankful her voice didn't betray her emotions. She again pulled away, this time able to get away from his grasp.

 

His eyes darkened slightly as he let her go. He smirked. “Doesn't mean you can avoid practice. The first competition is next Friday, I'll be working you harder than ever.”

 

Kagome just nodded and walked away, oblivious to the demonic smile on his face as he watched her go.

 

***End

 

Her brow furrowed as she tried to shake off the memory. He held true to his word. InuYasha was as adamant as ever getting them ready. And just as adamant to try to kiss her whenever they were alone. He didn't seem fazed at her evasions. He would just laugh and walk away as she avoided his advances, or watch her with an unreadable expression in his eyes before she walked away from him. Fortunately he got the hint and seemed to stop trying after a few nights ago.

 

She shuddered at the memory of the other night. She was so close to letting him kiss her that her lips still tingled at the thought. She rubbed her face as she cast the image from her mind. She couldn't bring herself to remember it. It didn't matter anyways. They didn't kiss, and it was better off they don't.

 

She knew he had hidden demons that he was fighting, and she knew she couldn't become lost in him while he did so, no matter how much she wanted to. Oh God how she wanted to. She could sense he was a danger to her, yet somehow her very being called for him, ached for him and trusted him, though she didn't know why.

 

She was attracted to him, she'd admit, but there was more to it. It was if his very soul beckoned hers, and she needed him. She needed to bring him back out of the depths that he had fallen. His eyes looked so lost and so helpless at times when he didn't think she was looking. And he seemed so pained whenever he put up an angry front against her and those around him. She wished she could wash away whatever torment he carried and lift him from his burdens, but he wasn't ready. And she couldn't let herself fall too deeply into him. It wouldn't do either of them any good. The best thing she could be was his friend, and wait for the inevitable, no matter how much he tempted her. No matter how much she wanted to be tempted.

 

She opened her eyes and sighed, steadying her nerves as she walked into the warehouse.

 

“Keh, about time you showed, wench.” InuYasha glanced up at her before fiddling with the amps.

 

Kagome just smiled. “Well, as my mother used to say, `better to say Kagome's late than the late Kagome'.”

 

Sango chuckled as she came out of her bedroom. “I like that, think I'll use it next time I'm late.”

 

“Pfft. You never go anywhere to be late for.” InuYasha snickered.

 

Sango eyed him in jest. “I can be if you ease up and let us live a little.”

 

InuYasha just shrugged.

 

Kagome smiled as she tossed her bag to the floor by the drum set and pulled out some sticks. When she stood, she noticed that InuYasha was watching her from over his shoulder before turning back to the amps. Biting her lip, she moved over to the drums in an attempt to ignore the heat she saw from those depths.

 

“Kagome?”

 

Startled, she looked up and grinned. “Hey, Kouga.”

 

The bass player cast a hard glare over at InuYasha, who was watching them intently, before he moved to stand closer to her. “Can you give this to Ayame? I promised to drop it off, but I haven't had time.” He murmured.

 

Kagome looked down to see him hand her a CD. Looking at the cover, she smiled. `Underoath.' Looking up at him, she giggled. “Well, seeing how it's mine, consider it done.”

 

Kouga rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. “Um, sorry?”

 

Kagome shook her head. “Don't be. Whatever I have I'd gladly share with you… and Ayame apparently.” She gave the CD a wry look. She was going to have a small chat with her friend when she got home.

 

“You're an angel.” Kouga grinned and headed back to his guitar. He gave a quick wink to InuYasha who was internally fuming.

 

InuYasha's eyes narrowed on the girl as she sat and adjusted the drums. He couldn't figure her out. He was certain the kiss they had shared would have made her want to avoid him or hate him, especially since he threw the kiss bitterly back into her face. Instead she came in every evening as she always had. She always smiled and laughed and obeyed. Never once did she mention the kiss.

 

He had tried to kiss her again. Fuck, how he tried. He had come close after the concert but damn if she didn't move and make the kiss into a fucking chaste peck on the cheek.

 

He growled. Every chance he got he would pull her away to ravish her whenever she did something endearing or innocently naïve. Yet each time she would just smile at him, ask him how he was doing, or just turn away. At first he laughed it off, thinking it was her way of getting back at him. She was just acting better than him and shoving her superior nose up at him. But soon he learned she was just being herself, soft-spoken, soft hearted, soft bodied…. She seemed to be totally indifferent to the kiss, as if it never happened at all. It aggravated him to no end. It then got to a point where he wanted to kiss her, to taste her mouth again, if anything to make sure it was real. But she always eluded him. She was still so high above him, and he needed her. He needed her to fall.

 

Yet as much as he wanted her, he had stopped trying to kiss her after his last advance. He grimaced at the thought of just a few nights ago.

 

***Flashback

 

Kagome stepped out of the bathroom, her face flushed and her hair was dripping wet. It was a long practice session, and the nights were getting hotter. She had gone in to the bathroom to douse herself to cool her body down after the session. He knew she wanted nothing more than to put on her cotton tank top and baggy shorts, but she knew better to get changed into her loose clothing when he was around.

 

She sighed and smiled at Sango. “It isn't enough that leather makes us look hot, it has to make us feel hot, too.”

 

Sango just laughed. “Yeah, I can't believe you're still wearing the pants and tank. I have an extra skirt and bra you can wear.”

 

Kagome fervently shook her head. “Oh no, that's okay.”

 

“If you're worried about fucking modesty, you ain't got it with what you're wearing.” InuYasha leered at her as he crouched down to unplug the instruments.

 

Kagome flushed. She was wearing the ripped leather pants again that he loved so much on her, and her top was a vinyl vest, laced in the front, and showing massive amounts of cleavage. She constantly fidgeted with the leather tie that held the vest in place as she tried to keep her modesty. Even now her slender fingers tugged on the stings. InuYasha had to shut his mouth quickly or he was certain he would have licked his lips in want.

 

Kagome just smiled softly, oblivious to his attraction. “No, that's okay, thank you.”

 

He shook his head in annoyance. Shame the bitch would have to change out of that tight outfit, but he couldn't have her be uncomfortable, no matter how much he said otherwise. “Put on the damn bra and skirt thing.”

 

She backed up slightly as if in fear. “I'm fine.”

 

“What's the matter with you, wench?” He frowned. “Put the damn outfit on. It's not like anyone here wants to fuck you. I highly doubt the outfit will do anything to make you remotely attractive.”

 

The girl cast her gaze to the far wall and was silent. If he had thought for a moment that he hurt her feelings, he was sadly mistaken. She just sighed and shrugged.

 

“There isn't any reason to change now. Practice is over.” She smiled softly. “Since we're keeping the equipment here, I'm going to take off now. I've got a long day tomorrow.”

 

Sango eyed her quietly. “You okay there, Kags?”

 

Kagome cast her eyes at her friend and smiled. “Always. I'm just so hot. I can't wait to get home, shower and sleep.”

 

Sango nodded slightly but frowned when Kagome turned to gather her gear. Her dark eyes shot daggers over at InuYasha who was watching Kagome on the sly.

 

Kagome casually grabbed her bag and hoisted it over her shoulder. “Well, see you all tomorrow. Have a great night, be safe.” She smiled at them before she ducked out of the warehouse and headed towards her car.

 

InuYasha scowled as he watched her leave. He quickly stood and brushed off his dark jeans. “Well, this shit is fine here as is. I'm going to jet, too.”

 

Everyone just nodded their heads towards him in farewell, too hot and tired to say anything else. He grabbed his helmet and headed out, ignoring the hard stare Sango gave him.

 

Out in the parking lot he could just see Kagome fiddle her key in the lock of her car. He grinned slyly and jogged over to her.

 

“Hey!”

 

Kagome looked up bewildered, then smiled. “Hey, InuYasha, are you going now?”

 

“What the fuck was that about?” He growled, ignoring her question.

 

Kagome ducked her head, knowing what he was talking about. “I'm sorry. I just don't feel comfortable in those type of clothes.”

 

InuYasha snorted and tugged on the lace of her vest, feeling a sharp jolt hit his loins as his finger accidentally touched her hot soft skin. “That's comfortable?” He asked, his voice unusually deep and gruff.

 

Kagome blushed and grinned shyly at his bold move. She subtly stepped back from him and rubbed her shoulder, unconsciously hiding her cleavage, much to his disappointment.

 

“More so than a bra and skirt.”

 

“Keh, these pants show more than a skirt will. Fuck, wench, don't want you to keel over from heat exhaustion. Wear the damn things.” He grouched.

 

Her eyes looked heavenward before she grimaced sheepishly. “I can't.”

 

Frowning, he pulled her face down to look into his eyes. “Give me a damn good reason before I force you to wear them.” `Besides, I'd like a good excuse to see more of that body.'

 

Her eyes widened slightly in innocent embarrassment and he had to keep his body in check to keep from bruising those delicious lips.

 

“Because.” She fumbled, trying to avoid looking in his eyes. “I… I can't keep my legs together when I drum and someone would see my….” She blushed harder and whispered as her eyes met his. “Panties.”

 

InuYasha felt his hand drop from her face in stunned realization. Visions of her wide spread legs and the treasure she hid being bared to the world both angered and aroused him. Okay, so that was a good excuse. There was no way in hell she was going to wear a skirt.

 

He mentally shook himself. “Fine. But the top?”

 

She averted her eyes away from him, as she blushed more. “It won't give me the support I need when I play. It will be a distraction for me.”

 

InuYasha looked confused at first, but then imagined her round tits bouncing as she played. Hell, she wouldn't be the only one distracted.

 

He tore his gaze away from her face as he fought off the growing erection he had at the thought. “Keh, whatever, wear jeans and a tank if you bloody well have to, as long as it ain't some girly angel shit.” He turned to go.

 

“InuYasha?”

 

He looked back into her soft blue eyes and smirked. “Don't want to get rid of me?”

 

She smiled. “I just wanted to thank you.”

 

“Thank me?” He turned to her in uncertainty.

 

She nodded softly. “For having faith.”

 

“Faith?” His eyes narrowed as he towered above her. It took everything he had to keep his temper in check.

 

Kagome didn't seem to notice as she cast her eyes down shyly and she nodded. “Thank you for believing in us, InuYasha. I know without you, and all the hard work you've put in, Perdition would never have made it in. So thank you in having faith in us.”

 

His anger vanished within the heartbeat that flipped suddenly in his chest. He lifted her face to look up at him and his eyes searched hers deeply. He wanted to say something, but nothing would come out. Instead, his eyes drifted down to linger on her soft pink lips.

 

He hesitated at first, knowing this was the best opportunity to finally kiss her again, but somehow, the reason wasn't the same. The thought of hurting her never entered his mind. He only had the thought of kissing her once again and worshipping the taste of her that he had been denied for much too long. Ignoring the warning signs his senses were flashing, he dipped his head down, stopped only by her soft voice.

 

“Sango.”

 

InuYasha blinked in confusion at Kagome before noticing the direction her eyes were looking. He turned to see Sango leaning against the warehouse, glaring at them.

 

InuYasha internally groaned and looked back down at Kagome. He dropped his hand from her face and growled down at her. “Keh. Get going, wench. You're boring me.”

 

He left her there at her car while he stalked over to his red Harley. He shoved his helmet on hard as he revved up the engine and tore out of the parking lot without a second glance. It was hard trying to hide his agitation at being interrupted, but what nagged him most was why he felt aggravated. Was it because Sango kept him from claiming the young girl, or the fact he never felt the need to kiss someone so bad in his life?

 

***End

 

InuYasha shook his head slightly to rid the memory as he stood up to adjust his mike. It was two nights ago, and the kiss they almost shared plagued his thoughts more and more. Hell, he forgot most fucks right after they happened, yet the thought of kissing Kagome turned him on more than any fuck he ever had.

 

He sighed. This girl was becoming more of a distraction than he first realized. He had thought a month ago that she would be easy to break, easy to fuck and easy to leave. But he hadn't been able to accomplish any of those things.

 

He ran his fingers through his hair, scratching his scalp as he fought the crawling sensation in his skin. He was feeling more and more agitated the closer the first competition came. Fuck, he needed something to take the edge off, and this shit with Kagome wasn't making it any easier. What he'd give for a quick high right now.

 

He hadn't taken a hit since before the concert at E.Z., and for good reason. The last shit he bought cleaned his account. He couldn't even afford to get a joint off that acid queen, Kikyo, until after the first competition. That is if they win.

 

They were told each band that made it to the next round got a bonus check and local publicity to promote their music. Perdition was good; he just hoped they were good enough to get past the first competition.

 

Fuck, he needed that check. It was bad road if you took a loan off of Naraku for his stuff, since you owed two hundred percent interest if you did. And he needed that shit now more than ever.

 

InuYasha watched the girl at the drums from the corner of his eye. She wore black hip hugger jeans today and a black sheer shirt with a neon green snake entwined around a broken apple. Her legs were spread wide as she sat at the drums, and he could almost imagine the smell of her cunt from here. The fucking wench was driving him crazy. She was the reason why his nerves were on edge. He wouldn't need a hit so bad if she would just fucking get him off like a good little bitch.

 

But the other night offset him. InuYasha recoiled his lips in disgust. When did he fall this deep? When did one kiss become more than a game? She wasn't even aware what she was doing to him. She probably wouldn't fucking care. Hell, if she could act like that kiss never happened, how would she react knowing about all the other things he wanted to do to her?

 

Probably look at him in disgust. She'd hate him and pull away from him. Fuck, if she could read his thoughts right now she'd probably run for the hills. Or worse, not care at all and act like his thoughts and actions didn't matter.

 

He tossed her a hateful glare but she didn't notice it. Typical. He clenched his jaw tight. Enough was enough. His kiss had backfired on him. Instead of making her fall, she rose, while he got swallowed in her shadow. She ignored all of his advances, but he wasn't about to be cast off so easy. Fuck, any woman would give their first born to be with him.

 

She just didn't know what she was missing. But could he blame her? The tight virgin in front of him didn't know how good it could feel. She didn't know how great it would be to have her body slick against his as she rode him to oblivion. Or how hot she would look with her head tossed back as she screamed his name while he came all over her. She didn't know, but she would.

 

The soul be damned, it was the body that couldn't be denied. And she has denied him long enough. If he could just have her once, get it out of his system, then she wouldn't tempt him so much. And possibly she would see being human was good. He'd be doing her a favor actually. He'd show her a side of humanity that shouldn't be feared or repulsed by, but embraced and milked for all it was worth. The girl could believe whatever the hell she wanted, but she was still human, and by hell he'd be the one to make her realize it. He wanted to make her crave him, adore him, worship him, and he would be her slave in bed. It was only a matter of temptation, and he knew just how to tempt a woman.

 

“You guys fucking ready or what?” InuYasha barked, glaring at them all.

 

Everyone looked at him stunned for a moment before readying their instruments.

 

“Yup.” Miroku eyed the singer uncertainly.

 

“Fine.” InuYasha growled over his shoulder. “Sex Type Thing.”

 

Kagome looked at him in shock.

 

“Got a problem, mouse?” He didn't bother to look at her. He knew how she'd react to his choice of song.

 

Kagome didn't respond, instead she crashed her sticks down to the drums and began the song. Everyone followed suit in rapid succession. InuYasha cocked a dark grin and cast a gaze towards Kagome over his shoulder.

 

I am, I am, I am
I said I wanna get next to you
I said I gonna get close to you
You wouldn't want me have to hurt you too, hurt you too?

 

InuYasha turned and walked slowly over to Kagome, his eyes never wavering from her tight body as she hit the drums with a force he'd never seen in her before.

 

Her blue eyes darted up to meet his. They narrowed subtly with an unrecognizable emotion and her mouth opened slightly from exertion. She looked undeniably undefiable. InuYasha could feel the familiar tightening in his chest at her blatant insolence, and relished in the need to swallow it whole once he defiled her.

I ain't, I ain't, I ain't
A buyin' into your apathy
I'm gonna learn ya my philosophy
You wanna know about atrocity, atrocity?

He fisted his hair at his scalp and glared at her, challenging her to look away as he rounded his hips, his hard bulge at her eye level.

 

 

I know you want what's on my mind
I know you like what's on my mind
I know it eats you up inside
I know, you know, you know, you know

He dropped his hand from his hair towards his cock and flicked two fingers, looking as if he was beckoning her to him, or fingering her lusciously, either way it gave him his desired result. Her eyes widened as she watched him intently. `That's it, baby, give in to it.'

 

I am a man, a man
I'll give ya somethin' that ya won't forget
I said ya shouldn't have worn that dress
I said ya shouldn't have worn that dress, worn that dress

 

He smirked when her eyes fell to the drums, a pink flush was climbing up her chest and neck. The idea was planted, now just to nurture it for her desire to grow. He turned his back to her as a disgusted need coursed through him at the sight of her. The last thing he needed to do now was become overeager. He walked casually back to the mike stand.

 

I know you want what's on my mind
I know you like what's on my mind
I know it eats you up inside
I know, you know, you know, you know

He turned his head to glare at her over his shoulder and a sadistic smirk graced his lips. He thrusted his hips slightly against the mike stand and his voice grew husky and deep.

 

 

Here I come, I come, I come, I come

Here I come, I come, I come

He turned and faced her once again, grinning when she refused to look up at him. He internally chuckled at her defiance, as if he'd give her the choice to deny him.

 

 

I am, I am, I am
I said I wanna get next to you
I said I gonna get close to you
You wouldn't want me have to hurt you too, hurt you too?

He walked like an assassin towards her, slow and calculated. His eyes became dark as his irises grew in hunger. He stood in front of her and waited for her to acknowledge him, but she held her ground and refused to give him the satisfaction.

 

I know you want what's on my mind
I know you like what's on my mind
I know it eats you up inside
I know, you know, you know, you know
I know you want what's on my mind
I know you like what's on my mind
I know it eats you up inside
I know, you know, you know, you know

`You think you can hide from it? Think you can fight the need you feel?' He crouched in front of the drums and stared at her, ignoring the scowls from his band mates.

 

Here I come, I come, I come, I come
Here I come, I come, I come, I come

Kagome shut her eyes for a moment before she flashed them open to meet his gaze. She wasn't about to back down to his actions and suggestions. But the way his body hummed with raw energy as he watched her though molten gold made her heart thunder in her chest in fear and yearning. She watched as he leaned forward onto his knees, bucking slightly as he ground out the rest of the lyrics, his eyes shutting as if in painful pleasure. Her mouth went dry and her body pulsed in wetness. She wanted to taste him so bad and it shocked her to the core. What was he doing to her?

 

 

Here I come, I come, I come, I come

Here I come, I come, I come, I come

Here I come, I come, I come, I come
Here I come, I come, I come, I come….

 

 

Kagome was panting heavily after the song had ended. She kept her eyes locked on to him, testing her strength, but her body failed her. InuYasha was panting heavily as well and he opened his golden orbs to watch her with lustful fury. She cast her head down and shivered. Why was he doing this? And why did she want it? She shut her eyes. `God, please give me strength, or I will fail us both.'

 

InuYasha swallowed hard and stood. He avoided the angered glances from his friends as he turned from the drummer. He made his point. And soon he would act on it.

 

-+-

 

 

Kagome stepped out of the bathroom after practice was over. She was about to head over to her bag before Sango stopped her.

 

“Kagome?”

 

The girl looked up to see Sango looking agitated though she was trying to hide it.

 

“Sango?”

 

Sango flicked her eyes over at the group before smiling at Kagome. “Mind staying a bit longer tonight? I made a few outfits I want you to try on.”

 

Kagome smiled and nodded, oblivious to the glare InuYasha and Sango shared.

 

After everyone had left, Sango led Kagome to the makeshift bedroom and flopped heavily down on her bed. She sighed.

 

“I didn't bring you here to try on shit.” She frowned, not sure how to approach the subject.

 

Kagome flicked her eyes up and down the girl and small trace of a smile graced her lips. “Then what is it you want to talk about?”

 

Sango seemed slightly taken aback at the girl's demeanor. Especially after the escapade that InuYasha pulled during practice. Kagome looked as innocent and unfazed as ever. Sango eyed her seriously and bit the bullet.

 

“What's going on between you and InuYasha?”

 

Kagome blanched slightly and looked down. At first it looked like she wasn't going to answer until she let out a heavy breath. “To be honest, I'm not sure.”

 

“Not sure?”

 

Kagome leaned up against the dresser and looked over at the wall, crossing her arms in the process. She seemed deep in thought for a moment.

 

“Ever wonder about fate, Sango?”

 

Sango frowned and looked away. “Can't say I have.”

 

Kagome sighed. “I do, all the time.” She looked over at the girl on the bed in contemplation. “I sometimes wonder if things really happen for a reason. If whether every decision we make is connected to something more than what we realize.”

 

Sango shook her head, feeling uncomfortable where the conversation was going. “We just live, Kagome. There is nothing out there to say whether it's good or bad, wrong or right. We just are.”

 

Kagome just smiled. “I'm not talking about good and evil, Sango.” She eyed the girl gently. “I know your opinion of me because of what you think I believe. I know how everyone avoids the subject when I'm around.”

 

Sango flashed her eyes up at her. “Kagome….” Sango drifted her eyes down to the floor. “It's not like that….”

 

Kagome softened her smile. “I'm not ashamed of what I think and feel, Sango. Yes, I do believe in a higher power, but not as you think.”

 

Sango looked up at her curiously.

 

Kagome looked down at her hands as she fidgeted with her fingertips. “I grew up in a Shrine. Did I tell you that?”

 

Sango shook her head, confused. Kagome talked about her real family on occasion, but never really gave specifics. She knew she had a family, knew she loved them and lost them, but she had never gone into detail.

 

“Yeah, my grandfather was an old priest who ran the Sunset Shrine. Our family followed the Shinto faith.” Kagome grinned. “My family was very traditional. They believed that everyone was born good, and lived good. Never was anyone bad, unless a demon caused it to happen.” She turned her head slightly to look at Sango. “Grandpa told me we have to fight these demons that taunt us everyday, in order to try to live a good life, but sometimes, the demon takes control when we are weak, and darkness follows. You wouldn't believe how many demon wards we had up in our shrine. He even gave me a kappa hand for my fifteenth birthday, whatever the heck that was I still don't know.”

 

Sango just smirked slightly. “What does this have to do with anything?”

 

Kagome laughed softly. “Nothing, really, because we are who we are. We decide how we live and how we want to be. But my grandfather was right in some way. We do fight our own inner demons that we face everyday. All of us.”

 

Sango looked up at her in shock. Kagome had demons? Her cinnamon eyes searched the girl's face, but she found nothing that would suggest the girl ever even had a hangnail, let alone a hidden demon within her. “Kagome?”

 

The girl shook her head. “No one is an innocent, Sango. I saw the war, too.” Her eyes looked distant for a moment before she smiled softly down at her. “I see what it's done to the people. I've seen what it's done to the children I take care of. I know what happens when desperation hits and people have lost hope. At times it can be so easy for me to give up. And it would be so easy for me to let everyone around me give in. But I can't. Because I know there is a greater good that can be found in each of us if we only believe.”

 

Sango was silent as she contemplated her words. “How can you be so sure there is a greater good?”

 

Kagome tilted her head as she looked up, as if seeing something that Sango could not. “Because I decided to live it.”

 

Sango stared up at her and blinked, before shaking her head. “Live the greater good? If only it were that easy, Kagome. There is no greater good to believe in. There is no God to believe in.”

 

“Things are only hard if you make them hard. It all depends on how you want to live.” Kagome frowned as she tried to explain. “God isn't some being that curses unbelievers and sends them to hell as people tend to think. God is in fact many things to many people. God is what you desire, it is the thing you create to make you stronger. People find strength in many things, and in turn make these things into a greater power. If you worship money or power then that is your God. If you want drugs and guns then that is your God. God is what you rely on to make you live and continue on. It is what you pray for, it is what you work for and what you strive for. So it is easy to blame these things, blame God, for the mistakes we make. And it is easy to say there is no greater power because of the horrors our actions have made. It is easy to blame what we created, instead of blaming ourselves. So I guess in that sense God can curse us to hell, but it is the hell we created.

 

“But there is hope. Because to some, God is love and life, and the greater power they desire is the betterment for humanity. That is what they work for. And to me, that is as simple as wanting nothing more than what I have been given.”

 

Sango grinned hollowly and avoided looking at Kagome. “I didn't think an orphanage director had so much.”

 

Kagome busted out laughing. “Well, I must admit a plasma t.v. and new car would be great, but it's just material. They will just break down or cause me more aggravation in the long run.”

 

Sango just shrugged. “Then what is it you have that makes it worth living the way you do? It's great you believe in love and life or whatever, but let's face it, Kagome, not much of that going around to believe in.”

 

Blue eyes stared down into brown. “That's why I have faith.”

 

“Faith?” Sango quirked her brow.

 

Kagome nodded and looked away. “It's mine and mine alone. No one can take it from me, only I can decide what I will do with it. And I decided to share it, by living the greater good, living the way God would live, living the way He would want us to live.”

 

Sango bit her lower lip. “I guess I can see that. But what makes you so sure there even is a God in that sense? You even said God is what you make of it.”

 

Kagome shook her head. “I can't answer that, no one can answer that really. It's just a feeling, an instinct in you that craves that connection.” Kagome shrugged. “It's not something that can be easily explained or easily understood. It's like when someone asks why you love someone. Sometimes there is just no rhyme or reason to it, you just do. You feel it deep within you, and there is no way you could possibly explain or show why it's there. But it doesn't mean it's not.” She heaved out a steady breath. “I guess the best way to describe it is by saying God is what you truly feel He is to you.”

 

Sango looked surprised at Kagome's response. She half expected a sermon explaining the ways of the Bible and shit. Instead she was given the most honest answer she had heard so far. “Then what is God to you?”

 

The girl looked shy all of a sudden before she cast her blue eyes on Sango. “God is a feeling more than anything, but just as real as having someone in the room with me. I have no other word to call it except God, though even then it doesn't feel it does it justice. Instead… well… the only way I can describe it is that it's like waking up and realizing it's the first day of summer vacation, or Christmas morning and you know there is a big present waiting for you. Or the feeling you get when you're alone and you sense there is a great adventure waiting for you just around the corner. It's that thrill of excitement of a life that can't wait to be lived. And all you want to do is laugh and explore and bring as many as you can with you, because the feeling is too great to not want to share it.

 

“It's also the feeling that you aren't alone when you cry or hurt or feel angry. And it's the knowledge that things will get better even when times are the most dark. It's hope. It's love. It's living. God is the life breath and the love in all of us that we share, wanting us to live good and be good to each other.

 

“To me, God is the greater good within us, waiting for us to live it. And I feel closer to whatever's out there, closer to everyone, when I live this greater good.” Her eyes seemed to dance and sparkle as she thought of it, her face looking so peaceful and elated.

 

Sango looked at her stunned before casting her eyes around the room. All she had wanted to know was what Kagome had going on with InuYasha. Instead she had gotten a closer look into Kagome than any person she had ever known. It was alarming to say the least, but it gave her a new perspective on the girl. She wasn't a bible believer as she mistook her for. She was girl that had dreams and ideas far too good for this world. Yet, in some small way, it made Sango feel good, that this world had someone like Kagome to care so much for it, to have hope that things would get brighter.

 

“Live the greater good.” Sango smiled softly and looked down sadly. “Sounds kind of nice.”

 

Kagome smiled gently and she looked up at the ceiling. “I think we all have the greater good within us. It's a connection we all share when we feel it, like we are apart of something bigger than life. Amazing how things would turn out if we decided to live it.” She looked at Sango with a hint of a smile on her face. “Heaven on earth, don't you think?”

 

Sango smiled delicately and grabbed her pillow to place on her lap as she fiddled with the corners. “You make it seem so easy, Kagome, living as if there can be no evil in humanity.”

 

Kagome sighed and smiled slightly, deciding to not answer. “It's getting late, I should jet.” She turned to go.

 

“Kagome?”

 

The drummer looked over her shoulder. “Yeah?”

 

Sango grinned devilishly. “So what does faith have to do with InuYasha?”

 

Kagome turned her face away. She was quiet for a long while and Sango was about to repeat the question before Kagome's soft voice filtered out the silence.

 

“It's a matter of faith, a matter of believing, that makes you live the way you do. But sometimes it's not a matter of believing in something, but just a matter of believing in someone that makes us live the way we do.” She turned her head back and smiled. “Goodnight, Sango.”

 

Sango sat stunned as Kagome left the warehouse. The girl made a lot of sense now that she opened up to it. She looked down at her hands that twiddled with her pillow. Could it be as easy as that? Wake up tomorrow and say, I want to live a good life? Sango looked up at her ceiling before shaking her head.

 

Kagome was an amazing woman, but how could she live like that everyday? Especially with the knowledge of how people treat her because of her faith? More so, how could she live with how InuYasha treated her?

 

`Sometimes it's not a matter of believing in something, but just a matter of believing in someone….'

 

Sango frowned at her statement. Up until tonight she secretly ostracized Kagome for her beliefs, but they were totally unfounded. Yet InuYasha took it to a whole new level. She knew he had a personal vendetta against the girl because of what he thought she believed; yet he seemed to viciously flirt with her too. Sango couldn't understand what his motive was, but by hell she would find out, and stop it.

 

 

A/N: Sex Type Thing is performed by Stone Temple Pilots. Wicked ass band. Sorry for the breaks in this chapter for flashback. I normally like to italicize memories, but MM has a glitch where all of the chapter will be italicized. If anyone knows how to remedy this I'd love to know.

 

I also want to thank all those that have reviewed so far. You are keeping me motivated to continue writing. I was beginning to feel bummed out because not many do review my stories and I was thinking they weren't very good. But I am glad a few of you like it and I will continue on for those who like my story and wish to see the end. As a small hint, if you do like it, even in some small way, could you let me know? Thanks, and god bless. WDW