InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ The Nature of Change ❯ Tuesday (Evening) ( Chapter 6 )

[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]

A/n: Thank you to the lovely reviews on Mediaminer.org. I appreciate the comments!

Lady Minokee: Thank you, dear.
VenusLegacy:Long review! Wow, thank you! I particularly love Sess/Kag, they might be my favorite pairing unfortunately, as much as I love inu/kag. I go through spurts of liking both pairings at different times. Thank you again.
The Almighty Aya-Sama: Well, I LOVE YOUR REVIEW. Thank you :).
Tsukue Kounami: Thanks ^^.  I try to really make the characters realistic. Happy you find a way to relate.


Kagome practically jumped out of her chair and fell over when the doorbell rang. The shock of him being as timely as he was really was expected, but still shocking nonetheless. Kagome smoothed out her worn down jean skirt, though she did not know why. Swallowing hard, she said a quiet prayer to the Kamis that the night would go smoothly, and she grabbed her jean jacket that had been thrown over the back of her couch as she pulled open the door.

There Sesshomaru was, glancing at her expectantly wearing a full on suit and tie combination. Kagome gaped and blushed as he blinked at her awkwardly. She could tell he was trying to think of something to say about her attire while sounding polite, and she was shocked he was so dressed up. After a moment or two of silence, he merely smiled and shrugged out of his blazer as he began to undo his tie. Kagome was puzzled, and began opening and closing her mouth without a thing to say, except to ask intelligently, “What're ya doin?”

Smirking at her, he laid his things down on her couch where her jean jacket had been previously and arched a single black eyebrow at her, “Getting comfortable, as it seems we were on different pages as to what was going to happen for the evening. By the way, you look beautiful.” Kagome felt the blush explode on her face as she covered it with her hands, “I'm sorry, I had nothing to wear!”

Sesshomaru laughed, putting a single hand on her shoulder reassuringly, “You're not being serious. I'm sick of the stuffy dates most people expect. It just means we'll have to... change our schedule up, which is really a pleasant turn of events.” Kagome smiled, unable to resist flicking the bangs that carelessly fell in front of his eyes... The eyes she used to find hauntingly familiar, and now only found them unique and enticing.

He appeared to freeze a bit at her forwardness, as if processing it only for a moment, and then gave her a genuine smile. He unbuttoned the top two buttons of his shirt, and rolled his cuffs a bit, then offered her his arm. She blushed gently, and grinned.

“Still proper, are we? I thought we were gonna go easy tonight now,” she teased him lightly, grinning. He looked out the front door as if considering something beyond her knowing, and looked down at her, “Well, for the most part, you are still a lady.”

Kagome felt her eyebrow twitch in annoyance and parroted his statement, “Mostly a lady?” He shrugged nonchalantly, and looked down at the trash bags near her front door curiously. He blinked at them monotonously, his attention suddenly shifting from her.

“Haven't made a trip out to the trash receptacle in quite some time, I see,” he commented deadpan, as if merely making an observation without giving away his true thoughts. Kagome groaned, wishing she had thought better of where to place her old stuff.

“They're donation clothes... I decided to tidy up a bit,” she commented awkwardly, not wanting to talk about her impromptu clean up not two hours before he arrived. She felt his arm tighten a bit around hers, strangely, and he commented, “Oh? That appears to be quite a bit of 'tidying'.”

Kagome nodded, tugging on him expectantly as if to hurry him from her abode and distract him from asking uncomfortable questions, “Yea, they just don't fit right anymore. I figured it was time to get rid of them.”

She felt Sesshomaru gazing at her, and his resistance to her tugging. She had averted her gaze instinctively, but something in his stillness compelled her to look at him. Slowly, she lifted her azure orbs uncertainly to his and stared into those sunlit irises of his. They searched hers in quiet contemplation, his face unreadable, and she was struck with nostalgia.

There are some things about him that haven't changed at all. That look is just the same...

His mouth was a thin line, and taunt, as if he understood the words beneath her words completely. Somehow, she knew he did. Nodding quietly, strands of inky black hair fell into his face again at the movement and he offered her his signature smile.

“Of course, sometimes it is necessary for us to clean out the old. It's the only way we can bring in something new, Kagome. It's nice to see you've started,” he stated to her simply, but Kagome hated his cryptic messages. They had more than one meaning, and Kagome automatically knew what he was referring to.

Or, she thought she did at least.

So, she merely acknowledged what he said with a nod of the head and a grunt of agreement. Sniffing audibly, he turned his body with her and led them both out the door, and Kagome closed and locked up her apartment contemplatively. He always made her think in more than one way, and she was beginning to wonder if he had more involvement in her recent changes than she was realizing.

Instead, when she was done she turned to him and he gave her another of his smiles. She loved them, and knew they were truthful and never forced. If there was one thing she knew about Sesshomaru, it was that he was truthful, and would never fake anything for anyone. That was one of the more admirable traits she enjoyed about him thoroughly, and  felt her heart stutter every time he gave that to her.

“Ready, Kagome?”

She wondered if he again meant more than she knew, and she could only wonder if she really was ready.

Ready for what? Ready for something more than I know?

But all she could do was be ready, because she could never determine anything beyond the moment she currently lived in. Kagome knew that then. She knew just as she could not change her past, she couldn't change her future anymore than trying to make the best of her moments. Moments so precious they slipped past faster than she had time to appreciate them for.  

It was why, she knew, she was always taking the present for granted. Because it was always there, always available, and she was always expecting something to change for her rather than making the change herself.

If only I felt this way years ago, I could have saved myself so much heartache.

It was then she noticed him watching her. His eyes were reflective, considering. He was as still as a statue, silent as the world around him and she found herself envious of his supernatural abilities. She returned the favor of staring for but a few moments, her thoughts churning in her head. What is he thinking? What does he see?

The urge to ask him was itching her tongue, but she couldn't bring herself to voice it. As much as she wanted to find out what he thought of her, on the flip side of the coin she was scared he would expose her weakness and vulnerability. It was one thing to have the intimate knowledge he knew her scars, and it was another to expose them into the air like a dead weight-- a land mine waiting to be stepped on and blow up in both their faces.

Breathing deeply, she closed her eyes momentarily against her thoughts—shards of glass that would cut her with her insecurities if she allowed it--and opened them with a bright smile. Her brightness accompanied her answer, “Yes. I am.” She had said it with a conviction in her voice she hadn't known she felt, and something changed in his eyes... Shifting, darkening in the light of the hallway. Somehow she knew, though he was pleased, he felt something beyond just the pleasure at her agreement.

And what that was, she could not recognize.

“Good. Shall we, then?” and without waiting for her say so, he began to lead them down the stairs. Kagome kept peaking at him out of the corner of her vision, trying to be indiscreet with her curiosity. She didn't understand him. She wasn't sure if she would ever fully understand him. Yet, some part of her was strangely okay with that. He had centuries behind him to learn, thousands of little instances composed of smells and colors and sounds and names and faces and she knew... Somehow, she would never have enough time in her entire short, human existence to learn about them. And that was assuming, a very bold assumption at that, that he would be continuing to be in her life for good. But since she had decided that the moments that really, truly mattered were the ones happening at that very moment... She and Sesshomaru could just start then by making new ones, new memories, and that would be how she would come to understand him.

Exiting her apartment building they came out to his inconspicuous four door sedan, and Kagome blinked. She gawked at his car in mild shock. It was an off-gold color, and very... professional looking, she supposed?

Sesshomaru seemed affronted with her genuine bafflement, looking somewhat taken aback by her reaction, “What did you expect? A sports car? Do you find me so youthful?”

Kagome rubbed her chin quietly, biting on a single fingernail secretly. Honestly, she had been expecting a more... masculine car. Fully, definitely a sports car. But this very everyday, normal car suited a white collared worker or a middle aged mother more than Sesshomaru.

I guess that's really part of who he is now.

Still, she merely shrugged while clearing her throat and attempting to find something sufficient to say. “It's nice,” she offered politely, “Definitely better than my car.”

He sighed, clicking the button on his keyring to unlock the car and went to open her door for her, while she maneuvered awkwardly around him in response. She knew he was polite, but to be treated so formally was something she definitely was not used to. She heard his soft sigh repeated as he closed the door once she sat down, and she ogled his ass as he walked around the car to his own door and let himself in.

Dare I say, his ass is nicer than mine. That makes me sad. Sniffing indignantly at the thought, it was annoying to say the very least that Sesshomaru's androgynous qualities put her own attractiveness to shame. Scoffing under her breath, she crossed her arms irritably and tried to let the thought go to the wayside.

She wasn't about to be moody at him over something he was born with.

He's still a bastard.

As he started the car, Kagome was grateful her second of appreciating the eye candy he offered went unnoticed. Instead, he smirked and replied to her earlier comment, “Such a bland statement meant yes, you were in fact expecting differently. As it goes, this is by far a very economical car as  gas efficiency is concerned. It is a wiser choice in Tokyo traffic to use a car that is less costly in mileage than a car that is loud and costs double the gas weekly.”

Kagome blanched momentarily, and then sputtered out in delighted, unexpected giggles. Sesshomaru slowly blinked at her, and turned his head to stare behind them as he backed out of the parking space, “What do you find so humorous, if I may inquire?”

Kagome waved a single hand to brush his curiosity off, but answered his question nonetheless, “Oh, just that you're as sensible as ever.”

Sesshomaru frowned in confusion, and answered, “I thought sensibility was something one desired in another?”

Kagome shrugged and pushed a stray lock of hair behind her ear, “It's just that... it's so expected of you. Of course you would do the most sensible thing. I wonder why I thought you'd do something different than that. Even when it is expected of you, I guess you're still able to surprise someone.” She lifted her eyes to look at the side of his face in silent contemplation, and it seemed he could feel her gaze, for he returned the stare the minute she started.

“I suppose I'll take that as a compliment, then, though it doesn't make complete sense.”

Kagome snickered, “It was a compliment. You haven't lost it.”

“Haven't lost what, exactly?” he ventured to ask hesitantly, as he engaged the car into drive.

“Your game,” was all Kagome offered up to him.

Sesshomaru simply snorted incredulously at her response and 'hn'ed, saying nothing more on the drive there. But Kagome was too content that she had bemused Sesshomaru into silence than to care about where they were going.

They rode in comfortable silence most the way, and Kagome unfocused herself in the sight of the lights streaking by as they rode past them. Night was always something Kagome felt she could envelope herself in, to wrap around so no one would see who she was. It was under the cover of night that she felt safest to unearth those damaged and precious feelings, examine them like broken diamonds, and put them away for the next day.

Kagome felt herself slightly jerk forward as they came to a stop, and she noticed they had parked in a parking lot. When she turned her eyes forward to check out where he had brought them to, Kagome nearly fainted in shock.

Secretly, Kagome pinched herself on the forearm to make sure she wasn't dreaming.

Ouch! Nope, I'm awake. I think I'd rather this be a dream.

But when all was said and done, it wasn't a dream.

Sesshomaru, former Lord of the West, Royal Pain in the Ass, King of Grammatically Correct and Elaborate Sentences....

….had brought her to a bar and dive. Literally.

It was called Dive & Bar.

She was so stunned by the obviousness of it all, she nearly wet her pants from shock.

Did he bring me here so people wouldn't know when he dripped green acid into my drink from all the times I've annoyed the pants off of him?... would annoying him that bad really get his pants off him?... NO WAIT, BAD. Okay, so, acid, painful demise, alcohol,  cheap bar food and a possibility to get him in his boxers.

...This might not go so badly.

He said nothing and was strangely silent as he parked the car and removed himself from inside of its interior. Kagome gaped at him on his way to retrieve her from her seat,  and she felt as if she were floating. She felt as if she were having an out-of-body experience as he gripped her hand and partially lifted her from the car of his own accord. She was too dazed to care about being manhandled, and she stuttered an awkward 'thank you'.

She would be genuinely hanging out with Sesshomaru. No skirting around formalities, no  long and strange dance of getting to know one another. He decided to share the most in-your-face, highest level of normalcy with her he could possibly think of by bringing her to his favorite bar and in someway she was flattered...

And nervous.

He felt that comfortable with her?

She lifted her head up to gaze into his face and study him. His hand was still placed innocently on her own hand, wrapped around it comfortingly. She watched his irises reflect the dusk light of the setting sun unnaturally, much like a cat, and for a moment she thought his pupils contracted into the slits she was used to seeing from years ago. His face was a mask, bare of any thoughts he might have been thinking about the moment, but he allowed her to attempt to figure him out at her own leisure. Yet there was a wall there, something that kept her from coming fully inside.

Not yet. Someday, but not yet.

She could almost hear the soft timbre of his voice caressing the insides of her mind with that knowledge, his silent promise to her; that he was trying to let her in as she had allow him to see her softest and darkest secrets.

Again, she wondered if she was over-analyzing. But a part of her felt assured with the belief that it was true.

Not releasing the grasp on her hand, he turned away slowly, the old mask sliding away and the new mask-- which one was true?-- sliding easily into place; his countenance eased within the space of a heartbeat, his tense shoulders relaxing as he led her into the dwelling.

“I do come here every now and then when I find the need to unwind after work. More often than not it is with the company of my male coworkers, but I do not drink,” he stated  genially, and Kagome was floored by his immediate 180 in personality. Every so often, she caught a glimpse of his old self-- the frozen persona with eyes like ice though they melted anyone who saw into them, whether by fear or by respect.

...In some cases, love.

It was his younger self she did not understand, did not see how Rin could care for him so deeply and so loyally. But she realized, children often see things adults do not. And if there was one thing that Sesshomaru had always been, and still remained, it was an honorable man. And she could see how that would win over a child's unending devotion.

When they arrived inside the dive, it was actually much more comfortable than the run down appearance it had on the outside. Red leather stools, a deep mahogany bar that was polished to a clean shine, and intimate booths in the darkened corners of the dive meant for groups of people or couples. She had to say she was mildly impressed-- besides the cigarette smoke, she rather found herself liking the image.

“Yamamoto-san! How's it hanging, bro?” a bartender called out from behind the bar, shouting out over the small murmur of the modest crowd gathered closest to the drinks. Kagome nearly choked on the very air she breathed because of the very familiar terminology the bartender had used with Sesshomaru.

She snorted in disbelief, giving him an incredulous look herself, while he pointedly remained looking ahead.

“Bro”?

Sesshomaru ushered the both Kagome and himself forward, extending his hand out western style to greet the bartender, “I am doing well. And yourself, Yuji-san?”

Yuji slapped his hand against Sesshomaru's with a very audible smack. Covering the handshake warmly with his free hand, Yuji enthusiastically shook Sesshomaru's hand in a hello as if he were greeting a Governor. Sesshomaru allowed Yuji the small pleasure of being so familiar with his person, much to Kagome's surprise, and then redirected Yuji's attention to her.

“I would like you to meet a very close friend of mine, and my date for this evening. This is Higurashi Kagome, Yuji,” Sesshomaru pressed his hand on the small of Kagome's back and pushed her forward gently, and Kagome sputtered and tilted her head downward in respect.

“ Good evening, Yuji-san. It's a pleasure to meet you,” she tried to allow herself good manners. All in all, she was around Sesshomaru. After a moment of awkward silence, she blinked and lifted her head upright only to find Yuji staring at her in shocked silence. He was opening and closing his mouth like a fish, and Kagome wanted to slap her hand under his chin to keep it shut.

Looking back and forth from Sesshomaru to Kagome, he lifting a single finger and pointed in-between them both, “You... and...and her?”

Sesshomaru arched a single eyebrow and confirmed Yuji's strange comment with a simple, “Yes.”

“The  Higurashi Kagome?” Yuji looked near hyperventilating, so Kagome decided to chime in with her own interjection despite her confusion.

“There's not many Kagomes running around so yes, that's me. What's the big deal? I'm nothing special,” Kagome waved her hand dismissively, trying to calm the strange reaction Yuji had to her being.

“Nothing special ? The guardian of the Shikon jewel, renowned time-travelling Miko is nothing special?!” Yuji exclaimed, not bothering to keep his voice down until Sesshomaru released a hiss of breath in warning.

“Quiet, imbecile. We're in public!” Sesshomaru muttered angrily, snatching Kagome by the arm who had gone stock still in mortification, and leading her away from the thoroughly embarrassed bartender. Sesshomaru moved them into an isolated, darkened corner of the bar where a booth would provide both comfort and privacy, and he knew he'd need both for the questions he was sure would come spilling from Kagome's mouth undeterred.

Kagome on the other hand didn't care how red Yuji was, didn't care about how angry Sesshomaru was because of Yuji's outburst; she merely was instantly reminded why she had decided to become a hermit in the first place.

Her breaths became deep and labored as anxiety filled her, her head swirling and crashing down on her in disturbance. But one thought rang louder than the others, beneath the hurried whispers of her mind that left her upended.

How did he know?

Sesshomaru instantly sensed her distress, and pressed a hand against the outside of her white tank top on her lower back, rubbing small circles there; trying to relieve the tension that was gathering in the small woman seated next to him.

“Shh. It is nothing to be bothered by, Kagome. Most youkai that live know your story. It is an imbedded part of our history,” Sesshomaru offered her the consolation, though it did nothing to ease Kagome's restlessness.

“How ?!” she seethed, trying to wrap her head around the notion. She had been lost to human history, but not in the world of youkai. It baffled her. Shouldn't youkai have detested her for her failure? Shouldn't she be a symbol of loss, not... not whatever it was, however Yuji reacted. But how he had reacted definitely wasn't a reaction of hatred.

“Think about that for a second. What loud mouthed halfbreed did you travel with?” Sesshomaru grumbled the fact irritably, waving a hand over at Yuji in a gesture that indicated he wanted a drink for the both of them.

Kagome sputtered, her eyes widening at the blaring fact. Of course Inuyasha would have shared all their adventures. Of course he would have gone around telling the tale. Anything to boost his male ego over victory.

 Before she knew it, she found herself face-planting against the tabletop, groaning out loud at how obvious it all was. She felt Sesshomaru flinch next to her in surprise, his intake of breath at her sudden movement. She was too emotionally exhausted to be amused by it.

At least, almost too exhausted. She did find herself chuckling inwardly to herself, even as Sesshomaru leaned over to place an order for the both of them, without asking her what she desired. Her thoughts returned to the thought of her old lover.

She had assumed they had defeated Naraku, merely because the world remained intact. Yet, how? What had happened to the jewel after Midoriko had expelled her from it, in an effort to save the young girl she had been? What had happened to...Inuyasha?

Had...had he found love after her?

Sesshomaru seemed to sense her thoughts because he sighed irritably, obviously put off by the subject of his brother, but he indulged her silent questions nonetheless.

“Inuyasha did in fact talk of your triumphs. Never once did he speak of the failure you shared with me. He never shared the wish you made with a single soul, though the jewel was destroyed in the process... That is why you are seen as one revered in our history. Yet, as time passed, everytime you were mentioned, his eyes would go blank and he would say nothing more. I was curious, but never asked the reason. I can only assume it was because he knew the truth, but he never once blamed you, Kagome,” Sesshomaru continued talking,  pausing only to take his drinks from Yuji who silently offered them, before he resumed after Yuji left them.

Kagome's heart was pounding as she kept her face laid against the top of the table, though she was listening. Her hair curtained her face, keeping the sight of the tears that leaked from her eyes from Sesshomaru. He knew she was crying, but was silently proud of her for not running away from the truth for once.

“He began to wander some years later, and began caring for lepers. I found it strange, but it was what it was. He fell in love with a young Miko named Sayuko, a Miko that cared for those sick with the disease,” Sesshomaru stopped his tale only as Kagome snorted.  Kagome couldn't help the bitter mutter that she spoke, “Figures. He always had a thing for Mikos...”

She was silently grateful he ignored her remark as he sipped his drink and continued, “They never conceived a child. Inuyasha mated her, and unfortunately, she was killed in a war when she was healing the wounded ronin that came to her. A ronin wished for her attentions, she declined as a married woman, and he stabbed her through the heart in a jealous rage. That happened....hn, about one hundred and seventy eight years after you left. Inuyasha died instantly, as mated pairs have intertwined lives when one of youkai heritage mates a human. Something to do with the differing energies, I suppose is the theory, though no youkai has figured out the true reason,” Sesshomaru closed his tale with another sip of his drink, and Kagome found herself wince at the telling clink of the ice in his glass shifting with a deafening finality.

Her shoulders were shaking. She was sure her mascara was an undignified mess. Yet Sesshomaru said nothing as she quietly mourned the future she had been denied as Inuyasha's mate, her selfish anger at his ability to move on and conflicting happiness that he had found someone to love beyond her. Her silent tears were telling, even as her companion lounged against the back of the booth with one leg strewn carelessly over the other and a single arm laying against the top of the leather seat. His eyes were thoughtfully closed, and as Kagome peered through the mass of hair that hid her tormented face, again she wondered his thoughts of her.

How often had he seen or heard her cry? How often had they come to this place of her wounded heart, bleeding before him? Squeezing her eyes shut against the torrential agony that beat against the confines of her soul, she crossed her arms on the table top and rested her pounding head against the top of them. She buried her face deep into the confines of her arms, as if it could shut out the world.

Then, Sesshomaru surprised her.

He never failed to surprise her.

He would act with cold indifference one moment that cut her, and the next he was running his long fingers through her hair patiently. She stiffened, and he either did not notice or did not care. He merely continued stroking her wavy locks.

“What has been lost is gone to us, Kagome. We are here now,” Sesshomaru offered as his only condolence to her personal suffering. Kagome snorted, giving a single shuddering breath and grabbed a napkin off the top of the table to blow her nose loudly. Sesshomaru waited calmly, removing his hand from her hair as he watched her make herself presentable.

“Yea, we are,” she said miserably, sniffing once as she wiped a new napkin underneath her eyes to clean away the evidence of her tears. Sesshomaru removed his hand with with nod of approval, scooting her drink closer to her. Most of the ice had melted, providing her a watery drink yet she didn't care. She merely downed it all in one gulp and Sesshomaru watched her do so.

“You will make yourself sick with such actions. I do not recommend you do such a thing,” Sesshomaru told her, yet did not stop her went she grabbed his drink and polished that off as well.

“I thought you didn't drink,” she commented, referring to his earlier comment before they had entered the dive. Sesshomaru smirked at her, waving a single hand at Yuji to prepare them another round of mixed drinks.

“Normally, I do not. I figured they would question my high tolerance. Yet, given the company I am in, I find that there would not be much question. Though, hopefully Yuj-san will provide me with something a bit... stronger,” Sesshomaru muttered, tilting his head back toward said bartender with a telling glance. Kagome snorted, staring with watery eyes into her empty glass.

Clink.

“Sesshomaru,” she stated his name, without gracing him with a glance. He merely hummed in acknowledgment to let her know he was indeed listening.

“How do you deal?” she had wanted to ask him that question from the get go. She heard him sigh, as he took the drinks from Yuji once again and nodded his head in thanks. Yuji offered a soft, 'you're welcome' in return, as to not disturb the obviously emotionally distraught girl.

Kagome mentally scoffed, yet returned her attention to Sesshomaru as he started speaking.

“I have had centuries to teach myself. It did not always come so quickly to me. Loosing a daughter and son before I myself had reached nirvana was one of the ways I learned. You have to continue with life because life does not stop even when you do,” Sesshomaru commented dryly, as he sipped the drink that had been made stronger. Kagome gasped, and quickly all her self-pity had been forgotten.

“What?! Oh my God, Sesshomaru, I am so sorry...” Kagome began weakly and shamefully. How could she compare her pain in face of such a terrible loss? Still, he cut her off with a shake of the head in the negative.


“Do not be. It has been nearly seventy years since I lost my daughter. Minako and I were never close, and my son Ryouichi died centuries ago. I also lost Rin, and the children I had adopted when she died prematurely. There are mistakes I have made, and there are things we have both lost. But as it stands, I am here, as are you, and we have come together again for a reason. We mustn't allow our pain to divert us from our current reality, or be overcome with what could have been when what is now is before you as we speak,” Sesshomaru spoke with such a rigid voice... It was flat and matter-of-fact. Yet Kagome tilted her head, staring at him thoughtfully because of the last comment he had made.

...we can't be overcome with what could have been, when what is happening now is right in front of me.

Her eyes widened slowly, and Sesshomaru smirked as realization entered her face. She watched in a daze as his hand slowly lifted to brush the hair from her face, and he cupped her cheek.

“I have watched you grow. I saw you as a child, and here you are as a woman. I have known you and of you, but not really you. And now I do,” he was speaking softly, and Kagome had to lean in to hear his quiet words.

She never saw it coming, though.

He closed the gap between them, pressing his lips hungrily against hers in such a way that left her in a daze. Her toes curled automatically as electric tingles raced from her head down to her feet and back again; her heat beating wildly as a frighten caged bird, trapped in the spell that was him. She clutched onto his shirt desperately, uncaring of the taste of alcohol and spice on his tongue. She opened her mouth automatically to allow him entrance and he enthusiastically responded.

His tongue swept into the entrance of her mouth, tasting her delicately, passionately as he wrapped his arms around her back and pulled her to him.

And Kagome knew, what he meant then.

He had been there for longer than I knew, watching me from afar, knowing what would happen. And he is here now, and neither of us know why, but we know not to question it.

And she wouldn't.

Instead she would drown herself in the reality that was Sesshomaru and Sesshomaru alone. And still...

She was strangely okay with that.

Because she knew, whatever the outcome, there was no use worrying about tomorrow. Because today was the only day that should matter, and since tomorrow hadn't happened as of yet...

She would live in the moment and hope Sesshomaru wouldn't break her heart.