InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ The New Student and Kagome's Secret ❯ Chapter 36: Tetsusaiga and the Demon Inuyasha's Connection ( Chapter 36 )

A/N: Okay so something really weird happened with my computer when I tried to read the reviews. I only got to read the first page of people and I don't want to address a few without addressing them all so I will give one big response for everyone.

Q: Will Naraku, Sesshomaru, or Kikyo will be in the future of this story?

A: If I told you that, I would ruin the story! I will tell you this though. By now all of you know that there is going to be some villain waiting for them so I can't tell you anything about Naraku or Sesshomaru yet because that would give the whole thing away. As far as Kikyo is concerned. Inuyasha will face a challenge in the end involving the same Kikyo/Inuyasha/Kagome triangle. BUT THAT'S ALL I AM GOING TO SAY! *swats away angry readers*

Q: Is there going to be a lemon between Inuyasha and Kagome and is there going to be a more serious intimate lemon between Sango and Miroku?

A: YES!!!!!

Q: How much longer is this story going to be?

A: Just a few more chapters.

Q: Will you write a sequel?

A: Hmm…that all depends. If I get a good response from this story's ending and you all vote for one then sure, why not!

Thanks to all those who reviewed telling me how great you think my story is! You all make this worth while! I mean that! Without further adieu!

Chapter 36

Inuyasha stared into the night sky. He sighed. He had found a small grassy hill just out of sight of his companions and was now sitting Indian-style with his wrists resting on his knees. A light breeze blew through his long silver hair, relaxing and comforting him. He remained deep in thought. He was both hurt and confused. He couldn't understand why Kagome had taken up for Kouga…his enemy! Kouga was trying to steal her from him! Didn't she know that?

`Wait a minute!' Inuyasha thought. `Kagome didn't know that. To her, Kouga was just passing through. Well, that explains a lot. I guess there are some things that are good to let Kagome in on.'

Inuyasha clenched his fists and growled angrily as he remembered how Kouga had embraced her.

`That stupid wolf!' Inuyasha thought. `If Kagome hadn't stopped me, I would have killed the bastard! How dare he touch her like that!'

`What are you talking about?' his mind argued. `She's not yours, remember?'

Inuyasha expression softened as he looked back into the sky.

`That's right,' he thought. `She's not.'

"Hello, Master Inuyasha," Inuyasha suddenly heard someone say. Inuyasha whirled around, startled by sudden sound of a voice.

"Hello, Myouga," Inuyasha said. "You startled me."

"Me? Startle you?" Myouga said with a laugh as he took a seat next to Inuyasha. "Your senses better be keener than that when we get to the castle. You said yourself there is no telling what awaits us there."

Inuyasha nodded and stared back into the sky. He sighed. Myouga looked at his master curiously. It was unlike Inuyasha to be sighing like that.

"Is there something bothering you sir, if you don't mind me asking?" Myouga asked as leaned forward in an effort to make eye contact with the hanyou.

"Huh?" Inuyasha said, snapping out of his trance and looking at Myouga. "Oh, it's nothing."

Inuyasha stared at the ground. Myouga smiled slightly. He knew his Lord better than that. There was definitely something bothering Inuyasha. He decided not to push the matter, however. He knew Inuyasha was very secretive about what was on his mind, and would become very defensive if anyone tried to push the matter. Besides, there was something else that was bothering Myouga.

"You know," Myouga said looking into the sky. "There is something that I have been wanting to talk to you about."

"Huh?" Inuyasha asked looking at Myouga suspiciously. "And what would that be?"

"Master Inuyasha," Myouga said. "There is something that has been troubling me and I thought I needed to tell you." Myouga took a deep breath. "How did you feel when you transformed today?"

The question caught Inuyasha a little off guard. He looked at the ground as he thought back to the events that had taken place earlier.

"I…I…just wanted to kill," he said as if he didn't believe his own words. "It was like I was a completely different person. Everything happened so fast and it was all blurred, kind of the way a dream would be. I remember...I remember wanting to kill Kouga and it didn't matter who or what got in my way."

"That's what I was worried about," Myouga replied solemnly.

"What?" Inuyasha asked quickly. "What is it?"

"Inuyasha, there is something I needed to tell you that I didn't feel needed to be discussed in front of everyone else," Myouga began. Inuyasha listened attentively. "Your father bestowed the tetsusaiga upon you to protect you, not to make you powerful. You see, you are a half demon. Your demon nature makes you want to survive even if it means slaughtering everything in your path for your survival. It's the animal instinct of survival. If you are severely injured in battle, your demon nature naturally surfaces in an effort to make you survive. However, tetsusaiga acts as a restraint against your demon side. It suppresses your demon side. If you are ever separated from tetsusaiga during a desperate time, your demonic side will surface." Inuyasha stared at tetsusaiga.

"Okay, now tell me why this is a bad thing," Inuyasha said.

"Remember when you were describing to me how it felt when you were transformed? You said that you wanted to kill Kouga no matter what got in your way," Myouga said receiving a nod from Inuyasha. "When you transform, you turn into an irrepressible killing machine with a disregard for who is friend or foe. You will kill and kill until someone finally kills you. Your demon powers take over your entire body, controlling you completely. With repeated transformations, you will lose your mind, staying that way permanently, and you will kill anything in your path. You will even go after Kagome and the others."

"What?" Inuyasha replied in utter shock. "I could never go after Kagome!"

"You're right," Myouga said. "YOU couldn't, but you have to understand that when you are permanently transformed, you will not be YOU any longer. But that is why your father left you with this sword. Tetsusaiga acts as a guardian sword. It will keep your demon side under control. Therefore, when at all possible, you should never separate tetsusaiga from you, especially during battles or desperate times."

Inuyasha pondered what Myouga had told him for a minute. He never knew the real reason his father had given him tetsusaiga. He always looked at it as a generous gift from his father. He never knew that it protected him and kept him from turning into a killing machine. He thought about what could happen to Kagome and the others if he were not to keep his demon side at bay.

"If that is true, then why did I transform today?" Inuyasha asked. "And why didn't I attack Kagome and the others today?"

"I paid close attention to the entire battle today," Myouga said. "While the others looked at it as just another one of your fights, my instincts told me otherwise. Kouga did hurt you pretty bad today. He hurt you enough to where you wouldn't have been able to save Kagome. You were helpless and badly injured. On top of that, Kouga said something about taking Kagome. That's when I noticed you snapped."

Inuyasha blushed and turned his head in the other direction. He knew Myouga was right, but he didn't want to let him see his embarrassment. He folded his arms and huffed. Myouga smiled and continued.

"As for why you didn't attack Kagome and the others, today was your first transformation," Myouga explained. "Today, Kagome sat you before you could even get to them for one thing, and for another, you probably still recognized them as not being a threat. You may not have recognized them as allies, but for some reason you didn't see them as an enemy either. You did growl at Kagome today, though."

"I did?" Inuyasha asked in disappointment. Myouga nodded.

"But that's about the time she told you to sit," Myouga said as he stifled a laugh. Inuyasha glared at him.

"You're enjoying this as much as she is," Inuyasha said narrowing his eyes at Myouga.

"Forgive me, sire," Myouga said bowing his head slightly, but he still held a big smile on his face. "But I mean what I say. Do not lose the tetsusaiga. You lose tetsusaiga and you will lose everything that is dear to you."

Inuyasha winced at the thought. He nodded his head at Myouga and stared back into the sky. Even after all the events that took place today, he was more worried about the decision that awaited him once he arrived at the castle. It was almost like a journey's end for him. He would have to make a decision as to whether or not he wanted to rule the Western Lands, and if he chose to do that, then what would happen to Kagome and the others? He sighed and leaned forward, bracing his elbows on his knees and staring at the ground. Myouga stared at him suspiciously.

"Sire, are you sure there is nothing bothering you?" Myouga queried.

"There's a lot of stuff bothering me Myouga," Inuyasha said as he fiddled with a piece of grass. "I don't know what to do about ruling the Western Lands, and if I do that, what happens to Kagome and the others? I've finally found people who accept me and I don't want to leave them. But I also have obligations to do. I understand that it is very rare for someone to turn down the throne, if it ever happens, but I am so confused."

"Take it easy," Myouga said resting a hand on Inuyasha's shoulder. "That decision will come upon your arrival at the castle. I am sure of it. Are you sure there is not something else bothering you? Like a certain young lady perhaps?"

Inuyasha looked at Myouga and blushed, then looked back at the ground.

"That doesn't concern you," he said shortly. Myouga smiled.

"Oh, I am sorry, sire," Myouga said with an evil grin. "I forgot Lady Kagome was merely your friend. It really is too bad though. She is such a fine young woman, so much like your mother. I mean if I was in your situation, and I had feelings for such a lady, I would take her as my queen and rule the lands with her."

"But she is just my friend, so drop it!" Inuyasha commanded, growling and pretending the thought didn't entice him. The two of them sat there for a minute looking straight ahead, neither of them breathing a word when Inuyasha broke the silence.

"Keh!" Inuyasha said still staring forward. "It's not like that would ever happen anyway! It will be more dangerous to rule the Western Lands and I would never be able to put her in that situation if I had feelings for her…which I don't!"

"True," Myouga said still looking straight ahead. "But if you did have feelings for her, Kagome is a strong woman and I am sure she could handle herself. Besides, you would be there to protect her."

"True," Inuyasha replied with his eyes still focused in front of him. "But if I did have feelings for her, which I don't, would I be able to protect her from myself with these transformations?"

"I believe you would," Myouga replied. "If you truly cared for her, which you don't, I am sure you would never let tetsusaiga out of your sight. Besides, Kagome and I would always be there to help you out during times like that."

"True," Inuyasha replied. "But if I did have feelings for…"

"Which you don't!" Myouga said mockingly, only to receive a fist to his head from Inuyasha. "Ow!"

"Kagome would never be able to see me as more than a hanyou," Inuyasha finished. "And she would never be able to love someone like me." Myouga quit rubbing his head to look at his master sympathetically.

"But I thought Kagome has already told you that she doesn't care that you are a hanyou," Myouga said. Inuyasha nodded.

"She did, but how do I know she wasn't just saying that," Inuyasha said.

"Kagome never just says anything," Myouga replied. "What about today?"

~Flashback~

"Hmph!" Kouga said with a smirk. "Kagome is too beautiful and powerful to be stuck with a hanyou like you! She deserves better than that!"

"Kouga!!!" Kagome said angrily.

Kouga and Inuyasha blinked at Kagome. She walked in front of Inuyasha and placed her hands on her hips. She glared at Kouga angrily.

"Don't you ever say something like that again!" Kagome said angrily pointing a finger at Kouga. Inuyasha and Kouga blinked at Kagome in disbelief.

~End Flashback~

Inuyasha blinked a couple of times when he thought back to how Kagome had defended him on numerous occasions about him being a hanyou. He even remembered the times she told him she would rather him be a hanyou than anything else. He smiled to himself.

"Look," Myouga said. "Just trust your instincts…er…to a certain extent that is, and follow your heart. It will never lead you wrong. You will find the answers to your questions in due time." Inuyasha smiled at Myouga.

"Thanks, Myouga," Inuyasha said. "I've always been able to count on you."

"Speaking of following your heart," Myouga said with a smile.

"Huh?" Inuyasha said.

He followed Myouga's gaze to find Kagome walking up to them. She had something in her hand. It looked like a first aid kit. Myouga smiled and turned back to Inuyasha. He stood up and dusted himself off.

"Excuse me, Lord Inuyasha," Myouga said. "I believe I will return to camp."

He gave Inuyasha smile as if to say "good luck", then walked towards camp, speaking to Kagome as he passed her. Kagome smiled at him, then walked over to Inuyasha. She stood a few feet from him and just stared at him. He was sitting Indian-style with his arms folded in his haori. He didn't recognize her presence and just stared into the sky opposite from her.

"Hi," she finally said nervously.

"Hey," he said not turning to look at her.

"You mind if I sit down?" she asked.

"Suit yourself," he said dryly. Kagome ignored the fact that his body language hadn't even acknowledged her presence and sat down. He hadn't moved a muscle since she got there. She set the first aid kit next to her.

"Inuyasha?" she said. He finally turned and looked at her and raised an eyebrow at her. "I am sorry for not doctoring your wounds sooner. Would you mind if I look at them now?"

"Keh!" Inuyasha said. "Forget about it. I don't need no doctoring." Kagome frowned.

"Yes, you do!" Kagome said in protest.

"Keh! Why don't you go doctor Kouga some more!" Inuyasha said flipping his head back in the other direction.

"Inuyasha!" Kagome said angrily, balling her fists at her side. She then suddenly relaxed and sighed. "I deserved that." Inuyasha whipped his head around and looked at her in shock. "I just wanted to make peace. I knew that you and Kouga hated each other and I thought that if you saw him being nice to me that you wouldn't hate him as much. I also thought that if I were nice to him, he wouldn't hate you as much either. Your fathers were friends. I didn't see why you two couldn't be allies as well. I guess I kind of went about it the wrong way, though, huh?"

Inuyasha looked at her for a moment, then stared straight ahead. He should have known Kagome was trying to do something nice. Even though she really did go about it the wrong way. He sighed and continued to stare straight ahead. Kagome looked at him, but Inuyasha made no move to look at her.

"Look," Kagome said. "If you're not going to talk to me, could you please at least let me dress your wounds?"

Inuyasha sighed and grumbled as he began taking off his haori. He took off his haori and then his white shirt. Kagome almost started drooling as she stared at the muscular wonder before her. Inuyasha gave her a funny look and she immediately snapped out of it and began dressing his wounds. She sat behind him and slowly and silently began to work. Inuyasha wanted to say something to her, but he didn't know what to say.

"Thank you," Kagome said suddenly. "Thank you for worrying about me."

Inuyasha's ears swiveled in her direction. He was beginning to feel guilty. He had worried about her, but she also didn't know the circumstances of everything. She didn't understand why he was worrying about her.

"Inuyasha," Kagome said.

"Yeah," he replied.

"Why were you so worried, if you don't mind me asking?" Kagome said innocently.

"Keh!" Inuyasha said folding his arms. "Don't flatter yourself! I was more worried about the jewel getting into Kouga's hands!"

"Oh," Kagome said, looking down at the jewel that hung around her neck. The hurt in her voice stabbed Inuyasha like a knife. He growled and grumbled as he fought a battle with himself. He didn't know if he should just talk to her about it or not. Finally…

"Kouga wants you for his wife," Inuyasha said suddenly. He had even surprised himself.

"What?" she replied in shock.

"You heard me," Inuyasha said.

"Yeah, but he already asked me when he captured me and I told him no," Kagome said.

"He plans to win you over," Inuyasha said flatly. "He is going to let you make the decision on your own for the most part, but he told me that in the end, he will have you, even if it means taking you by force." Kagome gasped and stopped doctoring Inuyasha for a moment.

`That explains a lot,' Kagome thought. `So that's why Inuyasha kept such a watchful eye on me while Kouga was here. Wow! I am surprised Inuyasha even allowed me to do what I did! Even if I `sit' him a million times, he would have normally done something about it.'

"Sorry, Inuyasha," Kagome said. "I didn't know. That helps me understand why you acted the way you did this afternoon."

"Acted?" Inuyasha repeated in confusion. "How did I act?"

"You acted as if I were doctoring an enemy, one that could kill me at any second," she replied.

Inuyasha's breath caught in his throat, but he didn't respond. He just looked up into the sky. Kagome smiled to herself and continued doctoring his wounds.

"I don't trust Kouga," Inuyasha said. "In fact, I hate the bastard! And you better not stop me from killing him the next time he is around!"

"Kouga doesn't really mean harm," Kagome said. Inuyasha turned and looked at her as if she had lost her mind.

"Are you crazy or something?" Inuyasha asked in disbelief. "I just told you that he wanted you for his wife…even if he had to take you by force."

"Yeah," she said smiling. "But I can sense his spirit. He has a good heart. He might have just been trying to stir you up a bit."

"Keh!" Inuyasha said folding his arms again. "I ain't jealous or nothing so get that out of your head!"

"No," Kagome said rolling her eyes. "But you are very protective of me whether you want to admit it or not and Kouga knows that."

Inuyasha pondered this thought for a moment. If Kouga knew he could get at him through Kagome, then that must mean that others would know that too. This was not good. He was going to have to talk to Miroku more about watching out for Kagome.

"Why are you taking up for the shithead anyway?" Inuyasha questioned. "You like him or something?"

"Nooooo!" Kagome said angrily, as she pressed hard on the wound she was doctoring causing Inuyasha to wince in pain. "Why does it always have to be that way with you? I am saying this ONE MORE TIME! I…DON'T…HAVE…FEELINGS…FOR…KOUGA!"

"Fine!" Inuyasha said quickly. "I…I mean…it's not like I care or anything! I was just asking so I would know whether to give him to you or not!"

"You wouldn't dare!" Kagome said slapping him on the back.

"OWWWW!" Inuyasha yelled. "What I am saying is if you wanted to be with him, I wouldn't stop you because it is none of my business!"

"Oh," Kagome said calming down a little. "It's okay, Inuyasha. I appreciate you caring about me and worrying about me."

Kagome leaned over Inuyasha's shoulder and rested her head on his shoulder. She looked up at him. He looked down at her and blushed. They stared at each other for a second, and it was finally apparent to Kagome that there was more than one reason Inuyasha was worried about the Kouga thing. He didn't want to lose her.

"I am sorry I worry you, Inuyasha," Kagome said sitting back up. "Thank you for taking care of me."

Inuyasha said nothing and just nodded his head. He stared forward and allowed his other worries to conquer his mind.

The next few minutes, Kagome doctored Inuyasha in silence. When she finally finished doctoring him, she scooted next to him and stared into the sky with him. Kagome glanced at Inuyasha out of the corner of her eye. He seemed to be deep in thought. Inuyasha paid no attention to her. He had to admit, though, her presence made him feel better. It was comforting.

"Inuyasha," Kagome said looking up at him.

"Yeah," Inuyasha said and looked down at Kagome. What he found, however, startled him. She looked up at him sympathetically with her face full of anxiety and fear…fear of him. He had no idea why in the world she was looking at him like that. "What?"

"Are you…okay now?" Kagome asked him with that same look.

"Kagome," he said still wary of her look. "What are you talking about?"

"Today," she said. "When you transformed. Are you okay now?"

Inuyasha's face fell. He nodded and looked at the ground. Now, he understood why she was looking at him like that. He knew what her next question would be. He wasn't quite sure how he was going to answer it though.

"What happened, Inuyasha?" Kagome asked in an almost sad tone of voice.

Inuyasha looked up at her. She was still giving him that look. He sighed.

"This is the first time it has ever happened to me," Inuyasha said. "Myouga said when I am separated from tetsusaiga, I will transform if I am threatened in some way. The sword is a guardian sword from my father that seals up my demon powers. When I am threatened, my demon side wants to fight for survival so I transform. I transformed when I thought Kouga was going to take you away."

Kagome gasped slightly and blushed. Her heartbeat sped up and she stared at the ground then back up at Inuyasha.

"Oh," Kagome said. Inuyasha glanced at her out of the corner of his eye.

"What is it?" Inuyasha asked.

Kagome then looked up at Inuyasha. The look on her face startled him to no end. It was the same look as before, only this time there were tears in her eyes.

"Inuyasha, I was scared," she said finally. This statement hit Inuyasha like a ton of bricks, causing his upper body to lean away from her slightly. He stared at the ground in disbelief. Not only was Kagome scared, but she was scared of him. Inuyasha cursed himself for being a half demon. If he was human, he wouldn't have to worry Kagome over this, but if he were a demon, he probably would have never cared for Kagome this much in the first place. Either way, he was screwed!

"Are…are you frightened of me?" Inuyasha asked hesitantly. He wasn't sure if he wanted to know the answer.

"No," Kagome said shaking her head. "Not normally. In your half demon form, I feel safe and I know you will take care of me. But when you transformed…I could sense your heart. It had changed. It was almost as if you didn't have one. That feeling of security and safety vanished, and was replaced with fear and confusion. You even growled at me threateningly. You had never done that before."

"I am so sorry," Inuyasha said hanging his head so his eyes were shielded by his bangs. Kagome placed a hand on his shoulder.

"It's okay," Kagome said comfortingly.

"No, it's not," Inuyasha said. "Next time…" He couldn't bring himself to finish the sentence out loud so he finished it in his mind… `I might come after you with these claws.' He clenched his fist tightly and began growling. Kagome sat there and waited for him to finish.

"I was just afraid that you will forget about me and the others," Kagome said. Inuyasha snapped out of his thoughts and looked at her.

"You know I will never forget about you guys," Inuyasha said. He wrapped an arm around her shoulders. "I promise."

Kagome nodded and leaned into Inuyasha's embrace. Inuyasha was still having trouble coming to grips with the fact that he had frightened Kagome…that she was afraid of him. He never wanted her to fear him. He wanted her to know that he would protect her and take care of her. He ran a clawed finger through her hair causing Kagome to look up at him.

"It's okay," Inuyasha said. "I will always remember you guys."

Kagome nodded and sat up. Inuyasha folded his arms again and looked into the sky. His mind drifted into his thoughts. Kagome looked up at him. She knew this had to be a very stressful journey for him. His brother tries to conquer the world, then he finds out he has a castle, then we find the jewel, then he transforms. Kagome sighed. She knew that anything could await them at Inuyasha's castle. She looked at him. He was still deep in thought.

`He needs to rest,' Kagome thought.

Inuyasha continued to stare into the sky when he felt something rubbing his ears. He looked down to find Kagome reaching up towards his ears. Inuyasha smiled. He swiveled his ears away from her grasp playfully. Kagome giggled and reached again only to have Inuyasha's ears swivel away. She giggled again. Inuyasha was smiling the entire time. Finally, he allowed her grab one and gently stroke it. Inuyasha began purring contently. Kagome smiled and pulled him down a little. Inuyasha looked up at her real quick.

"What are you doing?" he asked out of sheer reaction.

"You need your rest," Kagome said smiling sweetly at him. "Lay your head in my lap."

Inuyasha pondered this idea for a second. He felt the soft grass beneath him and realized it would definitely be better than sleeping in a tree sitting up.

"What about you?" Inuyasha asked.

"I just want you to not worry about me for one night," she said with a smile. "I will stay here until you are asleep."

Inuyasha smiled. He had to admit the idea was very appealing. He nodded and laid his head in her lap.

"Okay," he said looking up at her from her lap. "But just for tonight."

"Agreed," Kagome said with a nod.

Kagome immediately began rubbing his ears and head. Inuyasha nuzzled his head against her lap and closed his eyes. Kagome smiled. She loved Inuyasha's sleeping form. She didn't get to see it that often because he was always up for some reason or another. She gently stroked his head and ears.

`Thank you, Inuyasha,' Kagome thought with a smile. `Thank you for always protecting me. I wouldn't be here if it weren't for you.'

In the brush, just a few feet away, a flea demon, a cat demon, a fox demon, a monk, and a demon exterminator smiled brightly and ducked back into the brush to tip toe back to camp, leaving the hanyou and priestess their privacy.

A/N: Okay, a couple of you may be thinking that the jewel really hasn't come into play yet, but it will in the next chapter.

Don't forget to review and tell me what you think! I mean it! Sometimes I struggle to come up with ideas and you guys get online with some amazing idea and I just have to put it in my story! So please….MORE IDEAS!