InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ The Prophecy ❯ For Want of a Loving Mate ( Chapter 45 )
[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]
By: mshutts 
Anime/Manga: InuYasha Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Romance / Psychological / Hentai | Type: Yaoi | Uploaded On: 05.24.2006 | Updated On: 12.21.2006 | Pages: 3 | Words: 3.9K | Visits: 2.6K | Status: Work In Progress
Anime/Manga: InuYasha Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Romance / Psychological / Hentai | Type: Yaoi | Uploaded On: 05.24.2006 | Updated On: 12.21.2006 | Pages: 3 | Words: 3.9K | Visits: 2.6K | Status: Work In Progress
The Prophecy
By: mshutts
WARNING: incest
Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha or any other characters here-in
* * * * *
Chapter 44: For Want of a Loving Mate
Having left behind the two quarrelling halves of his mate’s mind, Sesshoumaru focused in on the one that apparently represented the part of his mate that he normally dealt with. It certainly looked and sounded like him, after all.
He wondered in the back of his mind why he was not finding the idea of there being three sides to his mate more disturbing, but decided he did not have the brain power currently available to wonder about it. He still needed to find out what was wrong with his mate and correct it.
As he talked to the version of his mate that looked to be trapped behind a barrier, he found himself becoming even more confused than he had been initially. Why was it that his brother saw nothing abnormal about talking to different parts of himself?
If it had been his own mind, Sesshoumaru was sure that he would be worrying about losing his mind by this point, and yet, his little brother was shrugging the entire situation off as if it was no big deal. Not only that, he was acting like this was perfectly normal and he, Sesshoumaru, shouldn’t even be questioning it.
Trying to come up with a question that would get him his answers, his weary mind stumbled upon something the witch had told him. His younger brother had seemed to take what she said to heart and so, he repeated a piece of her advice back to him. It had merely seemed like the thing to do at the time.
Sesshoumaru was unsure if he had said the wrong thing when his mate stopped suddenly and looked at him with measuring eyes. It was a new experience for the demon lord. He found himself feeling uncomfortable under the stare, although he was not sure why. He was almost feeling the urge to fidget but brushed that off as having been caused by lack of sleep in the real world.
He refused to admit even to himself how relieved he was when his little brother reached a decision and dropped to the ground, breaking the gaze. That steady, calculating look in his brother’s eyes just did not sit well with him. It was as if he was looking into his very being.
However, with the next words that came out of his mate’s mouth, he was once again thrown for a loop. He had not expected him to cave anywhere near this easily. He knew that his brother guarded his privacy rather jealously. To hear him suddenly willing to spill his guts was a surprise to say the least.
But Sesshoumaru was never one to pass up an opportunity and asked the questions that had been in his mind for a while now. However, once he began to get his answers, he began to wish he had not asked in the first place. For, while it was bad enough to hear what an awful mate he was from Inuyasha’s perspective, it was even worse to hear it told to him in a matter-of-fact voice.
If it had been screamed at him in anger, he could have written most of it off to the anger talking. If it had been ranted at him, he could have believed it was not necessarily something that had been thought out entirely and, thus, was open to interpretation. But this, this emotionless recitation of what his younger brother appeared to believe were facts, this was not something he could ignore. It was not something he could write off and, as such, it held more weight with him than anything else his sibling had ever told him.
In a flash of insight, he realized just why his mate was having so many problems and, with his defenses lowered by severe sleep deprivation, he felt ashamed. How could he have done this to his mate? He had never even considered how his behavior had looked to his little brother before. At this revelation, he could no longer meet his baby brother’s eyes. His younger brother was exactly right; he did not deserve to be his mate.
Feeling like a complete heel, he asked the one question he really did not think he wanted to hear the answer to. Why had his little brother chosen to be his mate? If their situations were reversed, he was sure he would not have wanted to be his sibling’s mate and would have fought his youki fang and claw over the issue rather than submitting to its will. And hearing that he only did it because it was what his youki wanted was just one more nail in the coffin.
But upon hearing that his mate thought his only motive for mating with him was to get an heir, he felt his youki’s anger beginning to rise again and it finally overflowed with the request to not kick him out before he gave birth. Of all the ridiculous things he had ever heard in his life, to hear that his mate seriously thought he was going to kick him out, that was by far the worst.
He raised his eyes from the ground, he could feel them burning with anger and made sure that his mate was looking straight into them so there would be no room for misinterpretation. “You are truly an idiot, little brother. I would never abandon you while you were pregnant. Only the lowest of the low would even consider abandoning their pregnant mate. I am not without honor.”
“Fine, fine, no need to get so pissed. It’s just that you do tend to toss me aside when you don’t see a need for me anymore, you know,” his mate said, still speaking in the unconcerned manner he had adopted throughout this entire conversation.
“I do not toss you aside,” Sesshoumaru stated with venom. The very idea was crazy. Why would he toss his mate aside?
“Yes you do,” Inuyasha replied, looking at him in all seriousness. “You do it all the time. Hell, you just did it back when we met up with Lord Kurasko.” He must have had a confused look on his face for his little brother decided to elaborate, “When you told him to ignore me so you could have your high and mighty youkai lord talk.”
“I did not believe you would be interested in such matters. Besides, had you wished to stay, I would not have made an issue of it,” Sesshoumaru stated, feeling the need to defend himself.
His mate now looked annoyed. “That’s hardly the point. The fact of the matter is: you continually treat me like I don’t count. Like I’m beneath your notice, not even worth the air I’m breathing in.
“You expect me to do whatever you say whenever you tell me to, and then turn around and want me to disappear as soon as I am no longer convenient to you.
“Yeah, well, you know what? I’m tired of it. I am tired of you confusing me. You say one thing and do another. Every time I turn around, you’re saying something different. You want something different. I have no idea what to expect from you and it’s only been getting worse recently.”
He listened in growing disbelief to what his brother was laying out before him. He then heard Inuyasha sigh, “You know what the worst part of it is, though? The worst part is that sometimes you act like you actually care for me. You tease me with pretending you might give a damn about me. Maybe even love me on some level. And then, then you turn around and spit in my face. Call me a ‘filthy hanyou’, try to kill me for being a ‘disgrace to the family name’, maybe make fun of the fact that I never actually got to meet father.”
As his mate was saying this, the hanyou pulled into himself further as if to make himself a smaller target. With his knees pulled up to his chest, arms wrapped around his legs and chin resting in the dip between his knees, his mate looked much younger than he normally did. The slightly lost look in his eyes as he spoke only added to the picture.
It was in this moment more than any other that Sesshoumaru was struck with just how young his mate actually was. It was easy to forget through all the brash words and deadly attacks, but his little brother was actually still a very young hanyou. He was still at the age where most demons would not yet be allowed out of their parents’ home.
And yet, not only was his little brother out in the world, he had his own pack, his own responsibilities. He had people who depended on him for their very lives. He had more responsibilities at such a young age than many full grown demons had. It made him wonder if this would have happened if he had only realized how important his little brother was sooner.
If he had known it was his future mate he was looking at the first time he met the toddler, would he have choked him and sent him away? Would he have tried to kill him as he got older? Would he now have a mate who was in tears? Wait, his mate was crying? Inuyasha didn’t cry. If there was one constant, it was that. Feeling like he had been hit with an exceedingly hard punch to the gut, he found himself wondering what his little brother could possibly be crying about, having a sneaking suspicion it had something to do with him.
As he was trying to figure out this latest conundrum, he heard the higher pitched, human voice of his mate yelling at him from behind. “What did you do to him, you bastard?!”
He stood and turned to see both sides standing, looking at him and waiting for an answer. The human side looked very distressed while the demon side merely looked curious. He had not even realized they had stopped fighting. Momentarily cursing himself for his inattention, he addressed the human side, “I did nothing to him.”
“Oh, yeah? Why don’t I believe you? He wouldn’t just up and start crying for no reason, bastard,” said the human side, walking towards him. He was expecting for the human to possibly physically attack him as he had attacked the full-demon side earlier, but, much to his surprise, he was completely ignored as the dark-haired male walked straight past him.
Sesshoumaru could not contain his curiosity and asked, “What are you doing?”
The human side ignored him and proceeded to walk straight through the barrier as if it did not exist, crouching down next to the hanyou inside. In words that were too soft for Sesshoumaru to make out, the human talked to his mate and eventually pulled him into his arms, appearing to be completely concerned with comforting the half-demon, no longer paying any attention to the other two in the room.
“He told you, didn’t he?” Sesshoumaru heard asked in a rough voice right next to his ear. Glancing quickly to the side, he noted that the full-demon side of Inuyasha had apparently come up to stand next to him while he had been engrossed in the scene unfolding in front of him.
“Told me what?”
“Why the human side is against us taking you as a mate.”
Sesshoumaru made a noncommittal sound and went back to silently watching the human comfort the hanyou. It was a rather disturbing image but he could not seem to pull his eyes away. His youki was trying to tell him that he should be the one comforting his mate, but he found himself at a loss.
His little brother didn’t really want him as a mate, he never had. He had already stated as much. And if he didn’t really want him as his mate in the first place, there was no way that he loved him. And it was this, more than anything that seemed to be bothering the youkai lord.
It had never really occurred to him that it would bother him if his mate did not love him. He had not thought he needed love. Hadn’t he decided that love had no place in mating? That mating was more of a type of treaty proposition than anything as flowery as romance and love?
He had seen what had happened to his father when he had shown love for his mates. Had he not decided long ago to have nothing to do with such a silly emotion? Shouldn’t he be happy that his mate had no such emotional attachments to him? And, yet, it hurt. This knowledge caused an ache somewhere deep inside him that he could not quite place.
Forcibly pushing his mind away from these thoughts, he realized abruptly that he was neglecting one of the resources available to him which was not like him at all. Once again blaming it on exhaustion, he turned to the full-demon side. This was, after all, the side that was completely for this mating. “Why did you want to mate with me anyway? I’ve done such terrible things to you.”
“Why wouldn’t I want to mate with you? You’re powerful, you’re strong, you smell really good. What’s not to like? Besides, we make a good match.”
He looked at this side with incredulity. If those were truly the reasons behind this mating, he was feeling even less stable in it than he had been. It was becoming more and more obvious to him that his little brother had never intended to have anything in the way of feelings for him. But something the demon said peaked his curiosity, “Why do we make a good match?”
“We compliment each other. You’re cold, calm, and calculating. I’m loud, brash, and impulsive. We even out somewhere in the middle. Besides, can you honestly tell me you’ve found anyone else out there with a youki anywhere near strong enough to attract you other than me?”
While he couldn’t argue with that logic, it was still quite disturbing to him. He idly wondered how his brother put up with this on a regular basis when he realized the demon half of his mate was coming closer to him.
“I wanted to apologize to you, my lord,” he said in a very submissive tone.
“What do you wish to apologize for?” Sesshoumaru asked, rather confused. It had looked like HE was the one who should be apologizing from where he was standing.
“For the human and half-demon’s behavior towards you. It is highly inappropriate.” The youkai lord turned an eye to the full-demon while he continued talking. “You are our mate, after all. Not only that, but you are the alpha. This display is utterly ridiculous,” he finished with a sweep of his hand towards the still-crouching couple.
Breaking away from Sesshoumaru’s side, the youkai lord heard a derisive snort as the full-demon drew nearer to the two figures. Once again, he watched the figure pass through the barrier as if it did not even exist and he supposed, for them, it might not.
Without even breaking stride, the demon pulled the human off the hanyou and flung him to the side. It was only after the human was no longer in the way that he could see the mess that his younger brother was. The tears had done nothing to help his countenance and Sesshoumaru was once again feeling the urge to go over comfort him in some way. All these thoughts went out of his mind, however as the full-demon version of his mate began to speak.
Addressing the hanyou with a scoff, he said, “Look at you. You’re pathetic. Crying like a newborn pup. It’s no wonder our mate doesn’t want you. You’re not worth his time. You’re weak. Useless.
“You’re lying here, crying, while our mate stands there, watching. You are making a spectacle of yourself and I am ashamed to have to call myself a part of your being.”
Sesshoumaru could feel his eyes widening involuntarily as the demon half continued to berate his younger brother. To have such hate towards oneself. He couldn’t imagine it. And on top of that, to have it directed towards his mate, who he was beginning to feel had every right to be crying, it was enraging his youki.
True, it was not a physical attack, but he knew that with his younger brother, the physical attacks did not often do anywhere near as much damage as the mental ones. He was just about to try and intervene on his mate’s behalf when the hanyou suddenly shot up from the ground and into his full-demon self’s face.
“Shut the fuck up,” the half-demon demanded. “You have no idea what you’re talking about.”
“Oh, I know exactly what I’m talking about,” the full-demon half responded. “You’re showing your weakness. You’re proving to our mate that you are not worthy of being his mate.”
“I’m not proving shit to nobody. The only people here are us. If I can’t cry inside my own head, where can I cry? It’s not like anyone else is going to know.” Sesshoumaru raised a brow at this. Had the hanyou forgotten he was there?
Apparently the human side, who had been silent up until now, agreed with him, “You do realize Sesshoumaru is standing right there, right?”
He watched in incredulity as the hanyou dismissed him with a flick of the wrist saying, “Oh, please, that’s not Sesshoumaru. That’s just a figment of our imagination.”
Sesshoumaru was finding himself momentarily without the ability to speak. How had his little brother reached the conclusion that it was not actually him that was standing there? The very idea was nonsensical. Why would his mate’s mind create him of all people? It made no sense to him. Although, this belief might explain why the hanyou was so willing to tell him all he wanted to know.
It appeared the human and demon halves were on his side for when he was able to focus back in on the conversation, he could hear the hanyou defending his accusations.
“You really think that’s him? You can’t be serious. How would he have gotten into my mind in the first place? Besides, he said he was here to retrieve me and to understand how my mind worked better. Why the hell would the real Sesshoumaru want to do that?”
The demon side responded, “Maybe he is trying to become a better mate to us.”
“Keh. Yeah, right. You know Sesshoumaru; he thinks he’s being a perfect mate. Therefore, any problems must be coming from our end. He would have no desire to become a better mate.”
Sesshoumaru, having finally gotten over his shock, decided that he had had quite enough of listening to this nonsense that was coming out of his mate’s mouth. It was obvious that the boy was having severe problems. As such, he took a step forward and said, “Inuyasha,” in his commanding voice.
Instantly, he felt three sets of eyes on him but he only looked to the ones that belonged to his real mate, the half-demon. “Inuyasha, why do you persist in maintaining that I am not actually Sesshoumaru?”
“Because you’re not.”
“What must I do to prove to you that I am, in fact, your elder brother and mate?” he asked, hoping that there was something he could do about this situation.
“If you’re really him, how do you explain your presence here?”
“Lady Sturaki came to the castle. She told me that you were in dire need of my assistance. You are my mate; I could not stand idly by when there might have been a way to help you. You have been unconscious for a long time.
“She then had me do something that involved looking into you and I found a presence. I recognized the presence as you and drew closer to it. When I reached the center, I found the three of you. In all honesty, I am not sure how I have reached here myself,” Sesshoumaru told him in all seriousness.
He watched as the golden eyes of his brother searched his, looking for anything false. Remaining still under the gaze was difficult for him, but he found the control to do so. It was not until after the gaze was broken that he realized there was now only one of his brother with him.
He looked around in confusion. “Where did the other two go?”
He watched a slow smile spread over his mates face as the calm answer came to him, “They were not needed anymore so they left.”
“I had thought they had a lot more arguing to do, little brother,” Sesshoumaru said, still not understanding.
“They’re not finished arguing by a long shot, big brother. But, they have reached one conclusion.”
“What is that?”
“It’s simple. We’ve realized that at least some part of you does care for me as a mate should. As such, my human side is willing to give you a chance.” He was offered another smile from his younger mate. “Now, how about we get back to the land of the living? Being stuck here so long was a pain in the ass.”
Offering the half-demon a small smile of his own, he said, “Lead the way, mate.”
* * * * *
Not at all what you were expecting I wager. Oh well, there seems to be a lot of mush in it to me. Maybe that’s just me. By the way, I realize there are some phrases in there that are modern and, as such, Sesshoumaru would never use them; I just couldn’t find another way to say it. Sorry.
Anyways, thanks for reading and/or reviewing. I really do appreciate both.
By: mshutts
WARNING: incest
Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha or any other characters here-in
* * * * *
Chapter 44: For Want of a Loving Mate
Having left behind the two quarrelling halves of his mate’s mind, Sesshoumaru focused in on the one that apparently represented the part of his mate that he normally dealt with. It certainly looked and sounded like him, after all.
He wondered in the back of his mind why he was not finding the idea of there being three sides to his mate more disturbing, but decided he did not have the brain power currently available to wonder about it. He still needed to find out what was wrong with his mate and correct it.
As he talked to the version of his mate that looked to be trapped behind a barrier, he found himself becoming even more confused than he had been initially. Why was it that his brother saw nothing abnormal about talking to different parts of himself?
If it had been his own mind, Sesshoumaru was sure that he would be worrying about losing his mind by this point, and yet, his little brother was shrugging the entire situation off as if it was no big deal. Not only that, he was acting like this was perfectly normal and he, Sesshoumaru, shouldn’t even be questioning it.
Trying to come up with a question that would get him his answers, his weary mind stumbled upon something the witch had told him. His younger brother had seemed to take what she said to heart and so, he repeated a piece of her advice back to him. It had merely seemed like the thing to do at the time.
Sesshoumaru was unsure if he had said the wrong thing when his mate stopped suddenly and looked at him with measuring eyes. It was a new experience for the demon lord. He found himself feeling uncomfortable under the stare, although he was not sure why. He was almost feeling the urge to fidget but brushed that off as having been caused by lack of sleep in the real world.
He refused to admit even to himself how relieved he was when his little brother reached a decision and dropped to the ground, breaking the gaze. That steady, calculating look in his brother’s eyes just did not sit well with him. It was as if he was looking into his very being.
However, with the next words that came out of his mate’s mouth, he was once again thrown for a loop. He had not expected him to cave anywhere near this easily. He knew that his brother guarded his privacy rather jealously. To hear him suddenly willing to spill his guts was a surprise to say the least.
But Sesshoumaru was never one to pass up an opportunity and asked the questions that had been in his mind for a while now. However, once he began to get his answers, he began to wish he had not asked in the first place. For, while it was bad enough to hear what an awful mate he was from Inuyasha’s perspective, it was even worse to hear it told to him in a matter-of-fact voice.
If it had been screamed at him in anger, he could have written most of it off to the anger talking. If it had been ranted at him, he could have believed it was not necessarily something that had been thought out entirely and, thus, was open to interpretation. But this, this emotionless recitation of what his younger brother appeared to believe were facts, this was not something he could ignore. It was not something he could write off and, as such, it held more weight with him than anything else his sibling had ever told him.
In a flash of insight, he realized just why his mate was having so many problems and, with his defenses lowered by severe sleep deprivation, he felt ashamed. How could he have done this to his mate? He had never even considered how his behavior had looked to his little brother before. At this revelation, he could no longer meet his baby brother’s eyes. His younger brother was exactly right; he did not deserve to be his mate.
Feeling like a complete heel, he asked the one question he really did not think he wanted to hear the answer to. Why had his little brother chosen to be his mate? If their situations were reversed, he was sure he would not have wanted to be his sibling’s mate and would have fought his youki fang and claw over the issue rather than submitting to its will. And hearing that he only did it because it was what his youki wanted was just one more nail in the coffin.
But upon hearing that his mate thought his only motive for mating with him was to get an heir, he felt his youki’s anger beginning to rise again and it finally overflowed with the request to not kick him out before he gave birth. Of all the ridiculous things he had ever heard in his life, to hear that his mate seriously thought he was going to kick him out, that was by far the worst.
He raised his eyes from the ground, he could feel them burning with anger and made sure that his mate was looking straight into them so there would be no room for misinterpretation. “You are truly an idiot, little brother. I would never abandon you while you were pregnant. Only the lowest of the low would even consider abandoning their pregnant mate. I am not without honor.”
“Fine, fine, no need to get so pissed. It’s just that you do tend to toss me aside when you don’t see a need for me anymore, you know,” his mate said, still speaking in the unconcerned manner he had adopted throughout this entire conversation.
“I do not toss you aside,” Sesshoumaru stated with venom. The very idea was crazy. Why would he toss his mate aside?
“Yes you do,” Inuyasha replied, looking at him in all seriousness. “You do it all the time. Hell, you just did it back when we met up with Lord Kurasko.” He must have had a confused look on his face for his little brother decided to elaborate, “When you told him to ignore me so you could have your high and mighty youkai lord talk.”
“I did not believe you would be interested in such matters. Besides, had you wished to stay, I would not have made an issue of it,” Sesshoumaru stated, feeling the need to defend himself.
His mate now looked annoyed. “That’s hardly the point. The fact of the matter is: you continually treat me like I don’t count. Like I’m beneath your notice, not even worth the air I’m breathing in.
“You expect me to do whatever you say whenever you tell me to, and then turn around and want me to disappear as soon as I am no longer convenient to you.
“Yeah, well, you know what? I’m tired of it. I am tired of you confusing me. You say one thing and do another. Every time I turn around, you’re saying something different. You want something different. I have no idea what to expect from you and it’s only been getting worse recently.”
He listened in growing disbelief to what his brother was laying out before him. He then heard Inuyasha sigh, “You know what the worst part of it is, though? The worst part is that sometimes you act like you actually care for me. You tease me with pretending you might give a damn about me. Maybe even love me on some level. And then, then you turn around and spit in my face. Call me a ‘filthy hanyou’, try to kill me for being a ‘disgrace to the family name’, maybe make fun of the fact that I never actually got to meet father.”
As his mate was saying this, the hanyou pulled into himself further as if to make himself a smaller target. With his knees pulled up to his chest, arms wrapped around his legs and chin resting in the dip between his knees, his mate looked much younger than he normally did. The slightly lost look in his eyes as he spoke only added to the picture.
It was in this moment more than any other that Sesshoumaru was struck with just how young his mate actually was. It was easy to forget through all the brash words and deadly attacks, but his little brother was actually still a very young hanyou. He was still at the age where most demons would not yet be allowed out of their parents’ home.
And yet, not only was his little brother out in the world, he had his own pack, his own responsibilities. He had people who depended on him for their very lives. He had more responsibilities at such a young age than many full grown demons had. It made him wonder if this would have happened if he had only realized how important his little brother was sooner.
If he had known it was his future mate he was looking at the first time he met the toddler, would he have choked him and sent him away? Would he have tried to kill him as he got older? Would he now have a mate who was in tears? Wait, his mate was crying? Inuyasha didn’t cry. If there was one constant, it was that. Feeling like he had been hit with an exceedingly hard punch to the gut, he found himself wondering what his little brother could possibly be crying about, having a sneaking suspicion it had something to do with him.
As he was trying to figure out this latest conundrum, he heard the higher pitched, human voice of his mate yelling at him from behind. “What did you do to him, you bastard?!”
He stood and turned to see both sides standing, looking at him and waiting for an answer. The human side looked very distressed while the demon side merely looked curious. He had not even realized they had stopped fighting. Momentarily cursing himself for his inattention, he addressed the human side, “I did nothing to him.”
“Oh, yeah? Why don’t I believe you? He wouldn’t just up and start crying for no reason, bastard,” said the human side, walking towards him. He was expecting for the human to possibly physically attack him as he had attacked the full-demon side earlier, but, much to his surprise, he was completely ignored as the dark-haired male walked straight past him.
Sesshoumaru could not contain his curiosity and asked, “What are you doing?”
The human side ignored him and proceeded to walk straight through the barrier as if it did not exist, crouching down next to the hanyou inside. In words that were too soft for Sesshoumaru to make out, the human talked to his mate and eventually pulled him into his arms, appearing to be completely concerned with comforting the half-demon, no longer paying any attention to the other two in the room.
“He told you, didn’t he?” Sesshoumaru heard asked in a rough voice right next to his ear. Glancing quickly to the side, he noted that the full-demon side of Inuyasha had apparently come up to stand next to him while he had been engrossed in the scene unfolding in front of him.
“Told me what?”
“Why the human side is against us taking you as a mate.”
Sesshoumaru made a noncommittal sound and went back to silently watching the human comfort the hanyou. It was a rather disturbing image but he could not seem to pull his eyes away. His youki was trying to tell him that he should be the one comforting his mate, but he found himself at a loss.
His little brother didn’t really want him as a mate, he never had. He had already stated as much. And if he didn’t really want him as his mate in the first place, there was no way that he loved him. And it was this, more than anything that seemed to be bothering the youkai lord.
It had never really occurred to him that it would bother him if his mate did not love him. He had not thought he needed love. Hadn’t he decided that love had no place in mating? That mating was more of a type of treaty proposition than anything as flowery as romance and love?
He had seen what had happened to his father when he had shown love for his mates. Had he not decided long ago to have nothing to do with such a silly emotion? Shouldn’t he be happy that his mate had no such emotional attachments to him? And, yet, it hurt. This knowledge caused an ache somewhere deep inside him that he could not quite place.
Forcibly pushing his mind away from these thoughts, he realized abruptly that he was neglecting one of the resources available to him which was not like him at all. Once again blaming it on exhaustion, he turned to the full-demon side. This was, after all, the side that was completely for this mating. “Why did you want to mate with me anyway? I’ve done such terrible things to you.”
“Why wouldn’t I want to mate with you? You’re powerful, you’re strong, you smell really good. What’s not to like? Besides, we make a good match.”
He looked at this side with incredulity. If those were truly the reasons behind this mating, he was feeling even less stable in it than he had been. It was becoming more and more obvious to him that his little brother had never intended to have anything in the way of feelings for him. But something the demon said peaked his curiosity, “Why do we make a good match?”
“We compliment each other. You’re cold, calm, and calculating. I’m loud, brash, and impulsive. We even out somewhere in the middle. Besides, can you honestly tell me you’ve found anyone else out there with a youki anywhere near strong enough to attract you other than me?”
While he couldn’t argue with that logic, it was still quite disturbing to him. He idly wondered how his brother put up with this on a regular basis when he realized the demon half of his mate was coming closer to him.
“I wanted to apologize to you, my lord,” he said in a very submissive tone.
“What do you wish to apologize for?” Sesshoumaru asked, rather confused. It had looked like HE was the one who should be apologizing from where he was standing.
“For the human and half-demon’s behavior towards you. It is highly inappropriate.” The youkai lord turned an eye to the full-demon while he continued talking. “You are our mate, after all. Not only that, but you are the alpha. This display is utterly ridiculous,” he finished with a sweep of his hand towards the still-crouching couple.
Breaking away from Sesshoumaru’s side, the youkai lord heard a derisive snort as the full-demon drew nearer to the two figures. Once again, he watched the figure pass through the barrier as if it did not even exist and he supposed, for them, it might not.
Without even breaking stride, the demon pulled the human off the hanyou and flung him to the side. It was only after the human was no longer in the way that he could see the mess that his younger brother was. The tears had done nothing to help his countenance and Sesshoumaru was once again feeling the urge to go over comfort him in some way. All these thoughts went out of his mind, however as the full-demon version of his mate began to speak.
Addressing the hanyou with a scoff, he said, “Look at you. You’re pathetic. Crying like a newborn pup. It’s no wonder our mate doesn’t want you. You’re not worth his time. You’re weak. Useless.
“You’re lying here, crying, while our mate stands there, watching. You are making a spectacle of yourself and I am ashamed to have to call myself a part of your being.”
Sesshoumaru could feel his eyes widening involuntarily as the demon half continued to berate his younger brother. To have such hate towards oneself. He couldn’t imagine it. And on top of that, to have it directed towards his mate, who he was beginning to feel had every right to be crying, it was enraging his youki.
True, it was not a physical attack, but he knew that with his younger brother, the physical attacks did not often do anywhere near as much damage as the mental ones. He was just about to try and intervene on his mate’s behalf when the hanyou suddenly shot up from the ground and into his full-demon self’s face.
“Shut the fuck up,” the half-demon demanded. “You have no idea what you’re talking about.”
“Oh, I know exactly what I’m talking about,” the full-demon half responded. “You’re showing your weakness. You’re proving to our mate that you are not worthy of being his mate.”
“I’m not proving shit to nobody. The only people here are us. If I can’t cry inside my own head, where can I cry? It’s not like anyone else is going to know.” Sesshoumaru raised a brow at this. Had the hanyou forgotten he was there?
Apparently the human side, who had been silent up until now, agreed with him, “You do realize Sesshoumaru is standing right there, right?”
He watched in incredulity as the hanyou dismissed him with a flick of the wrist saying, “Oh, please, that’s not Sesshoumaru. That’s just a figment of our imagination.”
Sesshoumaru was finding himself momentarily without the ability to speak. How had his little brother reached the conclusion that it was not actually him that was standing there? The very idea was nonsensical. Why would his mate’s mind create him of all people? It made no sense to him. Although, this belief might explain why the hanyou was so willing to tell him all he wanted to know.
It appeared the human and demon halves were on his side for when he was able to focus back in on the conversation, he could hear the hanyou defending his accusations.
“You really think that’s him? You can’t be serious. How would he have gotten into my mind in the first place? Besides, he said he was here to retrieve me and to understand how my mind worked better. Why the hell would the real Sesshoumaru want to do that?”
The demon side responded, “Maybe he is trying to become a better mate to us.”
“Keh. Yeah, right. You know Sesshoumaru; he thinks he’s being a perfect mate. Therefore, any problems must be coming from our end. He would have no desire to become a better mate.”
Sesshoumaru, having finally gotten over his shock, decided that he had had quite enough of listening to this nonsense that was coming out of his mate’s mouth. It was obvious that the boy was having severe problems. As such, he took a step forward and said, “Inuyasha,” in his commanding voice.
Instantly, he felt three sets of eyes on him but he only looked to the ones that belonged to his real mate, the half-demon. “Inuyasha, why do you persist in maintaining that I am not actually Sesshoumaru?”
“Because you’re not.”
“What must I do to prove to you that I am, in fact, your elder brother and mate?” he asked, hoping that there was something he could do about this situation.
“If you’re really him, how do you explain your presence here?”
“Lady Sturaki came to the castle. She told me that you were in dire need of my assistance. You are my mate; I could not stand idly by when there might have been a way to help you. You have been unconscious for a long time.
“She then had me do something that involved looking into you and I found a presence. I recognized the presence as you and drew closer to it. When I reached the center, I found the three of you. In all honesty, I am not sure how I have reached here myself,” Sesshoumaru told him in all seriousness.
He watched as the golden eyes of his brother searched his, looking for anything false. Remaining still under the gaze was difficult for him, but he found the control to do so. It was not until after the gaze was broken that he realized there was now only one of his brother with him.
He looked around in confusion. “Where did the other two go?”
He watched a slow smile spread over his mates face as the calm answer came to him, “They were not needed anymore so they left.”
“I had thought they had a lot more arguing to do, little brother,” Sesshoumaru said, still not understanding.
“They’re not finished arguing by a long shot, big brother. But, they have reached one conclusion.”
“What is that?”
“It’s simple. We’ve realized that at least some part of you does care for me as a mate should. As such, my human side is willing to give you a chance.” He was offered another smile from his younger mate. “Now, how about we get back to the land of the living? Being stuck here so long was a pain in the ass.”
Offering the half-demon a small smile of his own, he said, “Lead the way, mate.”
* * * * *
Not at all what you were expecting I wager. Oh well, there seems to be a lot of mush in it to me. Maybe that’s just me. By the way, I realize there are some phrases in there that are modern and, as such, Sesshoumaru would never use them; I just couldn’t find another way to say it. Sorry.
Anyways, thanks for reading and/or reviewing. I really do appreciate both.