InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ The Protector of Her Heart ❯ Between Life and Death ( Chapter 9 )

Chapter 9: Between Life and Death

 

Both Shippou and Hannah nearly jumped out of their skins as Inuyasha kicked open the door to Kagome's rooms, barging in holding the unconscious princess in his arms. “Something happened to Kagome!” he yelled, saying her name for the second time without realizing it before the two had time to gasp.

 

“My Lady…what…what is going on?” Hannah asked as Inuyasha strode past, with wild, worried amber eyes that she had never seen before. Closer, she could see that her mistress was covered in sweat and breathed heavily.

 

“She's ill! She needs help!” he roared, as Hannah ran out. Holding Kagome closely, Inuyasha gave the door to her bedroom the same treatment he gave the door to her sitting room; kicking it open. He lay her down gently on the bed, and placed his hand on her damp forehead. She was burning up.

 

A noise was heard and he turned; the dowager queen, alerted by the noise had come in. “Sir Inuyasha? What—” She stopped dead as she saw her daughter lying on the bed, looking so pale. Gasping, the queen stepped back a moment. “What happened?”

 

Turning back to the mother of the woman currently lying in a feverish state, Inuyasha didn't even take into consideration to whom he was speaking with when he yelled, “Call a physician! Quickly!”

 

The queen didn't even flinch at being ordered by a knight when she turned and bolted away, to alert someone, leaving Inuyasha and Kagome alone in her room, the knight becoming more worried by the second. Her breathing was still labored as she continued to burn up. Inuyasha's instincts knew that it had to be painful for her in all those heavy clothes, but his sense of self-preservation also knew that if he touched one piece of her clothing, he probably wouldn't be there to help her for very long. Trying to offer her some comfort, his fingers closed around her small hand, not feeling her respond back.

 

The fuzzy ears on Inuyasha's head twitched as another person came into the room. He looked and saw Shippou peeking in, looking frightened. “K-Kagome…” he asked, looking even worse when he saw her lying on the bed in such a state. “Is she…is she going to be okay?”

 

The small fox demon had asked the very same question that Inuyasha had wondered himself. “I hope so…” he whispered, looking back at her with worry in his amber eyes. Seeing her like this made all his protective instincts scream at him to do something, anything to help her, but propriety gave him leave only to watch over her. It was all he could do, with their positions the way they were. And he didn't like it one bit.

 

More noise came from the main room, as Hannah, the queen, and a tall, balding man Inuyasha assumed was the royal physician walked into her bedroom, eyes all widening as they looked upon their princess. The man immediately took charge, placing a hand over Kagome's forehead to feel her fever. “All of you will have to leave,” he commanded. “I will have to examine her.”

 

While Hannah and the queen left right away, Inuyasha didn't move. He didn't want to leave her alone, not when she was sick and vulnerable. After all, he was her protector, wasn't he? But the sharp glare the physician gave him was enough to let him know that if he didn't leave now, there would be consequences.

 

Turning back to Kagome, once again feeling that ache from somewhere in his heart that he had never felt before, he whispered, “I'll be back.” In a gesture that was more intimate than usual, the knight kissed her hand softly and slowly, and not without turning back once, left the room.

 

 

* * * * * * * *

 

 

Every minute was painfully slow as Inuyasha, the queen, Souta, Hannah, Shippou, Yuka, Eri, and Ayumi waited in her sitting room, no one daring to say a word. They knew that as they waited, word was almost certainly getting around the palace that the princess had taken ill.

 

The dowager queen held her son close, both holding their eyes downcast, with Souta clutching the fat cat Buyo. They had known Kagome all their lives, and she had never been a sickly child, so what she could have caught was a mystery to them now. What worried the queen more was the nature of this disease, since there had been no sickness in the palace, and Kagome hadn't traveled freely into the city in months. What could she have caught, when the likelihood of disease was so scarce?

 

Shippou sat all by himself, alone on the floor, occasionally glancing back at the door that led to Kagome's room. He had seen Kagome perfectly fine that morning, when she was laughing and telling him a story, why did she get sick now? He had only known her for a few weeks, and yet she seemed to have taken on the role of a surrogate mother to him. His own parents had been killed by much stronger demons, and now the fox was even more worried. Would she be taken too?

 

And Inuyasha leaned against the wall, his head down so his bangs hid his eyes, which never left her door. His emotions were tearing up inside of him, with panic and worry. He was supposed to be Kagome's protector, yet he had never seen this coming. When she had collapsed—he wasn't sure how long ago that was anymore—something sparked inside of him, something that didn't care what he had to put up with from that woman as long as she was safe. When he first became her protector, he had hated her, because she was a reminder of Kikyou, of those that had persecuted him all his life, and of the life of royalty that his brother and father had lived in that he could not stand. He thought she would treat him like other humans would—laugh, scorn, ignore, and occasionally, treat him as though he was their slave. He expected her to, and couldn't fathom that a princess of the Human Lands would act any different.

 

And yet…

 

She had spoken for him, kindly even, when she was in the mood. Kagome had argued back when he was angry, she let him protect her, and she shared some of her deepest secrets with him. Kagome, the human princess, trusted him, a hanyou knight. So much that she put her very life into his hands each day, and knew he would protect her with his own. She treated him almost like an equal, not a servant given to protect her.

 

And now, when he had failed, something broke inside of him that made all those protective feelings come to the surface. Kagome was his to protect. Even if it meant going into Hell and beyond, he knew he could never fail at this task. Inuyasha would risk everything, to see her well and smiling again.

 

He knew he had never felt like this with Kikyou. It was something more…But while Kikyou had told him of her life, and had smiled and laughed with him, there was something about Kagome, about the way she would argue with him like any commoner, about her wish just to be a normal girl…Whatever it was, made him silently repeat his vow to protect this time, only now, meaning it wholeheartedly. Until I die, I will protect her with everything I have…and I will hold to this, forever.

 

The door from Kagome's room opened, and the physician walked in, making all look up. Each face held a mixture of worry and hope; only Inuyasha's remained solemn. His nose could tell that her sickness would not be cured easily.

 

After what seemed an eternity, Countess Yuka stepped forward and asked, “What is wrong with Kagome?”

 

Sighing, the physician began, “It is worse than I thought…Somehow, she caught the recent plague that has been going through the countryside.”

 

There was a stifled gasp by all in the room, but Inuyasha remained silent. Only his determined amber eyes were replaced with ones on the brink of despair. “She has all the symptoms, high fever, paleness, small periods of freezing, dizziness, and shaking…” the physician continued, “By now, she will already have trouble breathing, since her lungs will start filling up…but unless I can get her to cough—” Tears were shed by the women in the room as they heard the fate of their friend. They knew that the worst had come. Kagome's symptoms had already begun, and those who had them this quickly were known not to survive long.

 

As the physician began to list the symptoms, Inuyasha only stood there, only his fingers began to tremble in fear as he remembered memories from long ago…

 

“Mama, Mama, are you all right?” a young Inuyasha asked, running up to the beautiful woman in the small hut, who fell to her knees, sweat building up on her forehead. “Mama?”

 

Forcing a smile back at her son, his mother said, “Don't worry Inuyasha…I'll be fine. I'm just not feeling well today, that's all…”

 

The scene changed to his mother lying on a pallet in their hut, the village herbalist kneeling at her side. “It's bad,” others outside whispered to themselves. “It's been going through the village lately…” “Who knows who might get it next?”

 

Feeling nervous, Inuyasha slowly walked up to the woman who looked so big when compared to his small size. “Is Mama going to be okay?” he asked, glancing back down at his mother, whom despite it all, still smiled at him.

 

The old herb woman gave him a half-hearted smile as well. “I'm sure she'll pull through,” she replied, standing up and walking out of the hut, leaving mother and son alone. Once the woman was gone, Inuyasha's mother grabbed his small hand.

 

“Inuyasha…there's something I want to tell you,” she spoke warmly, gently, as her son sat next to her.

 

“What is it, Mama?”

 

Taking a deep breath, she began, “Inuyasha…you know, I might not always be here for you…someday you might be on your own.”

 

“But that will never happen, Mama!” Inuyasha said at once. “You said we'd always be here, forever!”

 

A sad smile cross her face. “But I won't always be here…I'm human, Inuyasha. I won't live as long as you do…one day, I'll be gone from this world, and even though I don't want to leave you alone, I'll have to.”

 

Trying to hold on to some sort of security, the small boy asked, “But that won't happen for a long time, right Mama? You won't leave me now, right?”

 

“I hope not…” was her only answer, as she looked upon her beautiful boy sadly. “But if I'm not here anymore…then someone will come for you to take care of you.”

 

Inuyasha cocked his head, like a curious dog. “What do you mean, Mama?”

 

“You know how I told you about your father, Inuyasha…if I'm not here anymore, I told him to come get you.” Smiling softly as she remembered the kindness she knew in him, she continued, “He's a good man, Inuyasha…and he'll love you as his son, I know it.”

 

“But I don't want to go with him, Mama!” Inuyasha cried, hugging his mother. “I want to stay here with you!”

 

Hugging her son back, she replied, “I don't want it to be this way either, Inuyasha, but it might be…” In the back of her mind, she could feel the sickness already, knowing that it would be worse later because of her effort to appear well for her son. “One day, we will have to part, and that's the way it will be…but no matter what, always remember that I love you, Inuyasha…always…”

 

Once again, the scene flowed into the next as the boy version of Inuyasha looked back at the herb woman in surprise. “What?” he asked, hardly believing it.

 

“There is a cure,” she assured him. “But you have to hurry…if you want to save your mother, then I need some rare herbs, right away!”

 

Without a second thought, Inuyasha took off towards the forest, following the woman's instructions exactly. Sometimes, people got well from the sickness, but there were others, who didn't. His mother had been sick for a week, and had still not gotten better, but finally, there was hope when the woman had told him that day that she had found a cure! Maybe he could save her…no, he had to save her! He had to!

 

Due to his speed and superior tracking skills, it wasn't long before the boy was racing home, towards the village. He burst into his hut, where he knew the woman would be. “I've got the—” Inuyasha began proudly, holding the herbs up, before being met with a dead silence.

 

There were many people in their hut, and all looked at him with pained eyes. The herb woman turned around, her eyes holding sympathy as well. Confusion was met with shock as he saw his mother lying on the pallet she had been for the past week…only now she was covered in a death shroud.

 

The herbs dropped to the floor as the boy cried out in despair, “Mama!”

 

Remembering his mother, that ache that he felt for Kagome only grew deeper. His mother had died from the same disease. Kagome could die as well. It was only a matter of time…

 

While the others were slowly going into Kagome's room to see her, Inuyasha couldn't do it. He didn't want to see Kagome in a worse state than she was before, and if she were to die…he couldn't even contemplate it. But the truth was that he couldn't do anything. The physician was treating her, they'd never accept advice from him. All he could do was wait…wait for the inevitable.

 

Turning around sharply, the hanyou stomped into the hallway where all his emotions spilled out as he furiously punched the stone wall, leaving an impressive hole behind. “Damn it!” he yelled, his fist slamming into the wall again, and again, until his knuckles bled. “Damn it, Damn it, Damn it all!” he cursed over and over, before sinking down to his knees, his fists still shaking from the release of energy.

 

The awful, harsh reality kept hitting him over and over, pounding in like a hammer hitting a stake. Kagome was dying, and there wasn't a thing he could do to prevent it.

 

 

* * * * * * * *

 

 

There were no festivities, or feasts, or anything now that the word was out around the palace that their princess laid between life and death. All court life had stopped, each courtier holding their breath, awaiting the fate of their princess. Each person prayed that the next news would be good, but it seemed that it was not to be. Her fever had been steadily rising as the days drove on.

 

While some wept, Inuyasha walked around in a state of unreality. It seemed like the world around wasn't quite real, that everything was a cruel dream. He had never before cared for her much, other than feeling a bit sorry for her because of the circumstances, but now that he might loose her…He wouldn't be able to handle it if she died, and it was looking like the inevitable might happen now.

 

As he wandered through the hallways, not paying much attention, he noticed another who looked like they also were on the edge from recent events. Kouga also appeared out of the darkness, glaring at his rival, but also holding a sadness in his blue eyes that could not be hidden.

 

“What do you want, wolf?” Inuyasha asked, turning away from the clearly upset demon.

 

Kouga spat, “Why aren't you watching after your princess, mutt?”

 

“Keh, you know they won't let me within three feet of her now, idiot,” the hanyou glared. “The only people that come near her are her family and those moronic physicians.”

 

Inuyasha started walking away, but Kouga called back, narrowing his eyes in an intense look. “Some protection you are then, if you couldn't even protect her from this!”

 

Inuyasha paused for a second, for his rival's words to sink in, before whipping around sharply, fire radiating in his amber eyes. “What did you say?”

 

“You heard me, mutt! If you were supposed to protect her, then why couldn't you protect her from this?”

 

The hanyou was rendered speechless momentarily until he lashed back, “It's not like I could protect her from it! It's not my job to keep her from getting sick! If that wench ends up like this, then it's her own damn fault!”

 

“You bastard!” Kouga roared, punching the hanyou full in the face. “You can just stand there and insult her when she might die?”

 

Recovering from the sudden injury, Inuyasha retorted, “I don't want to see her die, damn it! But there's nothing I can do about it!” I couldn't even save my mother…he silently added. I wouldn't be able to save her…

 

“Like Hell there isn't!” Kouga's normally calm blue eyes fired up in rage. “Don't you get it, mutt? The princess is dying, and those human idiots don't know anything! But you know a cure to save her!”

 

Turning away, Inuyasha spoke sadly, “They won't listen to me. I can do nothing when it comes to things like this…”

 

The wolf snorted, “Mutt, I'm sure if you really care at all for Princess Kagome, you'd find a way to make them listen to you.”

 

“Are you saying I don't care about her?” Inuyasha snapped back.

 

“Well, you've never shown it,” Kouga muttered, glancing at the enraged hanyou. He expected Inuyasha to yell at him again in one of his usual tantrums, but instead, he only saw him growl dangerously, one of his hands closing into a fist.

 

“Right now, the only thing I care about is Kagome,” snarled Inuyasha, “Don't you dare say otherwise.” With that, he turned away, leaving a very confused wolf demon behind.

 

Did he just…say her real name? Kouga wondered, pondering the implications of that one little change.

 

 

* * * * * * * *

 

 

With a heavy heart, Inuyasha took the familiar steps up to Kagome's room, his ears drooping at what he knew he would find. The door to her sitting room was partially open, since physicians and nurses were coming and going so often. As he slowly creaked open the door and came in, he was met with the somber eyes of the dowager queen and Prince Souta, the only ones who stayed in that room all the time.

 

A nurse walking out with a bowl of sodden rags broke the silence as she walked past, muttering to her friend, “Her fever won't go down, poor girl…”

 

Finally, after what seemed like an eternity of standing there, his eyes on the doorway to Kagome's room, the dowager queen asked, “Did you want something, Sir Inuyasha?”

 

“How is she?” he asked slowly, his eyes betraying his relentless worry.

 

Eyes looking down, she replied, “Her fever is still high…They were able to get her to cough and release the fluid in her lungs…but nothing can be done about that fever. They've…tried everything, but…” She shook her head for a moment, “If only something could be done!”

 

Inuyasha felt his heart drop even more for this woman, worried to death about her child. “Can I go see her?”

 

The queen nodded, and Inuyasha slowly walked towards the door, his feet feeling heavier with each step. What would he find beyond that door? Would Kagome so sick that she wouldn't be recognizable? Immense guilt rose up in him. Was it really his fault that she got sick? Because he wasn't watching her enough? Kouga was right; how could he just sit by and let something like this happen?

 

He turned the doorknob and took a small breath as it opened, to reveal Kagome's bedchamber. Many nurses were cleaning up, all piled around her bed. Heart pounding in fear, Inuyasha took a step closer. And there she was, lying on the soft mattress under a light blanket, clad only in her shift. She was so pale, and her long, sweat-soaked hair was bound up in a braid. Even as he looked at her, he could see sweat forming on her head as her breaths were labored, struggling to stay even.

 

“Ka…gome…” he whispered, unable to believe what he was seeing. The fiery spirit that he saw days ago was replaced with a weak body, struggling to stay alive every minute. It seemed like the nurses knew instinctively that he didn't feel comfortable with them around, as they left the room, leaving him alone with her.

 

He sank to his knees, at the bedside, ears fully drooped and eyes despairing. “Kagome…I'm sorry…” he spoke, still not noticing his sudden usage of her first name as he kept on. “I'm sorry you had to go through all this…I'm sorry I couldn't protect you from it…I'm sorry…”

 

Her arm lay on top of the blanket next to him, and close up, Inuyasha could see the faint bruises where they had leeched her. He felt the urge to curse those idiotic human physicians at the very sight. He had never understood how draining someone's blood could be healthy, since he knew from experience that too little of blood was never a good thing to have. Wanting to comfort her nonetheless, he gently took her hand.

 

Even her fingers felt hot to the touch, and he remembered how it was said her fever had been rising, getting close to dangerous levels. How could her body possibly hold up if she continued to stay so hot and sweat everything out? Inuyasha felt her shake slightly, but when he squeezed her hand, she calmed down. Kagome…

 

She's really helpless…He thought, his eyes nearly filling with tears. How can this just go on? If someone doesn't do something, then…If I don't do something, then she might…

 

Maybe it wasn't just because he was worried that the physicians wouldn't listen to what he had to say. Maybe it was also because he was a bit afraid. He had tried to save his mother, but had failed in the end. Maybe he was afraid of that as well, of failing to save the woman he had sword to protect. It was easier to say that he couldn't do anything and leave it at that then to try and to fail. But as he saw her, wasting away before his eyes…

 

I can't just let this go on, he realized. I was too late to save mother, I can't be too late this time!

 

Tightening the grip he had on her hand, Inuyasha told her, “Kagome…I can't…I won't let this happen like it happened to my mother! I'll find a way to save you! I promise, I won't let you die, Kagome!”

 

After he said those words, he felt Kagome just slightly squeeze his hand back. It was weak and barely there, but it had happened, meaning only one thing; she had heard him.

 

Regretfully, he released her hand, promising, “I'll be back soon. Please, Kagome…hold on until I get back,” and with that, he walked out of the room, with only one thing on his mind; saving the woman who waited for his return.