InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ The Strength of Love ❯ Chapter 3 ( Chapter 3 )

Disclaimer: I do not own Sesshoumaru...-pouts-

The Strength of Love

NOTE: Sesshoumaru might seem a little out of character in this chapter, but I think it works. I think with Rin being with him he might have broken down some of the walls...I also think that since he is showing some of his emotions at his home if anyone would make a comment about it he could just kill them and I think they all realize that. But anywho, I hope you like this chapter.

The next morning she woke up in his arms and smiled as she thought about what happened during the night. 'He is mine and I am his.' She wiggled from his arms because she didn't want to wake him and successfully made it to the closet before he woke up.

"Where are you going?" he asked.

"I'm going to the bathhouse. I didn't mean to wake you. Please, go back to sleep."

"I am not tired," he stated in a tone that made him sound like a child.

She smiled seductively. "Do you want to join me?"

"If my Rin wants me to."

"She does."

They made it to the bathhouse without running into anyone and slipped inside. Rin laughed remembering the last time they bathed together.

"What is so funny?"

"Remember when we bathed in the river?"

"Yes I do," he said impassively.

In her best Sesshoumaru voice she said, "I am a Lord and I do not bathe in a river."

He gave her a playful glare and let it soften as if he was thinking of something.

"What are you thinking about?"

"I was thinking about it."

They both stepped into the basin. "I miss him," Rin said.

"I miss him also."

She smiled her signature smile and grabbed his cheeks in her hands and pulled his lips close to hers. She looked him in the eyes and then gave him a kiss that seemed to last a lifetime.

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"Jaken! Jaken!" Rin rushed down the hall knowing the little toad was in Sesshoumaru's study. 'I have to tell someone or else I am going to go nuts waiting for him.'

"What is it my Lady," he said begrudgingly. She silently laughed. Ever since they mated he's had to call her Lady. She knew he hated that so much.

"I'm pregnant!!" she shouted.

"I know."

She glared at him. 'Why does he do this to me? Why couldn't he play along?'

"I'm sorry, my Lady. That is wonderful news."

"That's better Jaken," she said as she picked him up and gave him a great big kiss on the cheek.

"Rin!"

"Don't think I liked it," she said walking out of the room.

'I can't wait to see our child. I bet he will be just like his father. I wish he would come back. I know he knows. He's so nice to let me figure it out on my own. I wonder how long his talks are going to last? It has been a month since I've felt him near me. I just want him back in my arms again. Be safe, my Lord. Kohaku, watch over him.'

All of a sudden a surge of sickness moved through her body. 'I'm gonna...' She raced to the nearest place she could think of, the kitchen, but it was too late. She threw up all over the floor at the doorway to the kitchen.

A servant ran down the hallway. "Lady Rin! Are you all right, Lady Rin?"

She stood up and held the sleeve of her kimono over her mouth and nodded. When she wiped her mouth on the beautiful fabric as she said to the servant, "I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to! I was trying to get into the kitchen! I thought I could make it!"

"It's fine, my Lady. Why don't you get some rest?"

"Yes, I suppose I should."

She walked slowly up the stairs and into her old bedroom after she got an old bucket from one of the servants, just in case. 'I'll stay in here for a while. I don't want his room to smell bad because of me.' She crawled into the bed as she started to gag. 'This really came on suddenly.' She shrugged it off as she threw up in the bucket. 'I guess because he is half demon.' She lied back down in the bed and curled up into a small ball, hugging her stomach.

She woke up feeling strangely warm. She opened her eyes and tried to sit up, but saw Sesshoumaru's arm around her waist and his hand resting on her stomach.
"Why did you come in here?"

"Sesshoumaru. When did you come back?"

"Rin."

"I came in here so you wouldn't have to smell it."

"I returned a little bit ago. Now, come back to our room."

"I don't want to ruin the smell in there."

"Rin," he said sternly and she bowed her head so it curled up on her chest.

"All right." His arm let go to allow her to sit up. She stood up and started to walk to the door. "AAHHH." She fell to her knees clutching her stomach.

"Rin!"

She waved her hand for him to back off. "I'm fine. There was just a sharp pain. It's gone now." She got up from the floor slowly as he came up behind her. "Everything is fine."

They made into their room and Rin collapsed onto the bed. "I can't believe I'm so tired."

"Get some sleep," he said walking out of the room.

"Where are you going?"

"To my study. Get some sleep, Rin."

She closed her eyes as she heard him shut the door.

She woke up the next morning and found herself underneath the sheets. She breathed in through her nose and caught the smell of him. Then the nausea hit her and she leaned over the edge of the bed to look for the bucket until she realized she left it in the other room. 'Oh no.' She lifted her upper half back onto the bed then turned over on her back. 'I feel awful.' The sharp pain from last night hit her full force.

"AAHHH!!!" She sat up and brought her knees to her chest. 'This hurts so much! I hope he didn't hear me, but I know he did.'

"Rin!" she heard a man's voice yell down the hall.

"It's nothing, Sesshoumaru!" she yelled back, but he came anyway. When he came through the door she saw his head sharply cock to one side, like he smelled something odd.

"Something is wrong Rin. I can smell it."

The pain subsided and she felt something warm around her thighs. If she could see her face at this moment it would be ghostly pale. She pushed the sheets off of her and the once cream color of the sheets was now a deep red. She looked up at him in horror. "What is happening? What's wrong with the baby? Is he? Can..?"

"I will get the woman."

"Sesshoumaru," she cried. She watched him leave the room and heard him walk as fast as he could down the hallway.

She had fallen asleep waiting for him to come back and when she awoke, Kagome was sitting on the bed beside her.

"Kagome. How am I? How is he?"

Kagome looked somber as she looked into Rin's eyes. "I think it was when you were hurt a while back. Remember the bleeding? You must have hurt more than I thought and...and...I'm afraid that you will never be able to have children."

"No. That cannot be," she said flatly.

"Yes. It's true."

"Sesshoumaru. I want my Lord."

"I will get him."

A few minutes later she came back with him. His face was also somber, but his eyes held optimism. She saw him grasp his sword.

"Rin. I can heal you, but the baby has already died."

"Can't you save the baby too?"

"The baby is gone, my Rin. You will be healed though. You will be able to have children," he said in his most comforting voice he had.

"I want this baby! I wanted to give you an heir!"

"And you will," he said sitting beside her where Kagome sat before.

She reached for his shoulders and cried into his chest. "I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry."

"It is ok," he said as he placed his hand on her head. "Lean back."

She nodded and lied on the bed. She closed her eyes not wanting to see what was going to happen.

"Open your eyes, Rin."

"Is it over?" she asked with her eyes still closed.

"Yes."

She opened her eyes and put her right hand on his cheek. She wanted to smile to thank him, but her heart wasn't in it.

"You should rest, Rin," spoke Kagome.

"Yes. Rest while I take her back." He brushed his hand on her cheek and leaned over and kissed her forehead.

'Oh, how you've change, my Lord Sesshoumaru,' she thought as she shut her eyes, 'how you've changed.'

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A few days later Rin was sitting in the garden with her eyes closed and her body shivering.

"This is the second time my child has been taken from me," she said to the trees and dying flowers. "I was happy when we mated. I was happy for those few months after. I was sad when he had to leave, but that changed when I found out. I was happy again. I was happy."

She opened them to look out over the garden and then looked up to the autumn sky. "I was happy! Why won't you all let me be happy?! I want to be happy again!"
She looked back to the garden and stood up. The tears didn't come. They had not come since her baby was taken. "I'm not going to cry anymore. I can't cry anymore. I don't have it in me anymore. I have been stripped from my body because of the jokes the gods like to play on me."

She walked along the path back to the palace. She stopped before she got to the door and sighed. 'I don't want to go in. I don't want to see anyone.' She thought about the time she came here after Kohaku died. 'I'm not going to do that. It will hurt him too much. Sesshoumaru, I don't want to hurt you anymore.'

She walked inside and straight up to her old bedroom. She hadn't been back to his room since the day after.

"I don't feel like being near him," she told one of her servant friends yesterday. She remembered turning around and seeing him there. His eyes were filled with pain. She just bowed her head and walked past.

'I haven't seen him since then,' she thought. "I'm sorry, m-," she stopped. "Sesshoumaru."

She crept under the covers and lied there looking at the mirror across the room.

"You need to sleep, Rin."

She saw something white in the corner of her eye, but did not move her head to look fully at him.

"I'm not tired," her voice sounding drained of any emotion.

"Rin," his voice starting to sound emotional.

"You are not sounding like yourself, Sesshoumaru. What's wrong, my Lord."

"You."

She swallowed. "I am fine. You needn't be worried about this person anymore. She will return to you tomorrow."

She could see him move into her line of vision as he came towards the bed and sat down on the edge. He brought his hand to her face and moved her hair behind her ears and then brushed the back of his palm on her cheek. She closed her eyes and locked her jaw when he touched her.

"Please, leave me alone," she said without inflection. She felt the bed move and she opened her eyes only to see his face staring back at her.

"I will not leave you alone."

"I'm sorry that I'm weak. You don't deserve me. You are powerful. I cry at every little thing. I wish I was strong like you."

"You are strong. You have kept living after you lost. That makes you strong," he said in a loving tone, reserved only for Rin when they were alone.

"I am so weak that I killed our baby, Sesshoumaru!"

"You did not kill it," he said brushing her cheek again. This time she did not cringe. "Rin, things happen and you cannot change them." His eyes glazed over. "You have to move on and that is what makes you strong."

"I was so happy. I wanted to make you happy."

He stood up. "Sit up Rin."

She reluctantly sat up with her legs draped over the side of the bed and her feet resting timidly on the floor. He then sat down on the floor and leaned on the bed. She slid off the bed and onto the floor bedside him.

"Sit here." He motioned to his lap.

"What? I'm not seven."

"Rin," he said looking annoyed.

She moved over and sat in between his legs and leaned on his chest. He reached to the Tenseiga and pulled it out from its cover. He put it across their legs.
"Rin. This is the Tenseiga. This is the sword given to me by my father. My father was a great lord. He protected his lands and he protected his people, but most of all he protected his family. That is how my father died. He was protecting the ones he loved."

Rin felt his chest move as he took a deep breath.

"He was protecting my half brother and his mother. I was upset and angry. I wanted to kill them because if it was not for them my father would have been alive. I understand why he was willing to die for a human and a hanyou now, but that is not my point. My point is that I was upset and," he paused, "I still am. I understand that you will always be upset, but you cannot let it get to you. You move on and grow from it. My father gave me this sword and I was angry that he liked that hanyou more to give him the better sword. I now know that I have the better sword because it gave me you. The last of my father's love was this sword. I move along in my life missing my father, but I do not let it consume me. I know he-"

By this time Rin had moved the sword to his side and turned around and sat on her knees. His head was facing over his right shoulder and his eyes were closed as he told his story. She reached around his neck and brought him closer into a hug. This stopped him talking and his head to move back to her. She brought her hands back and onto his cheeks rubbing his purple marks on his face with her thumbs.

"I understand. I will move on and become stronger for Kohaku, for my children, and especially for you, my loving husband and mate."

She brought her lips to his and kissed him. She backed off still holding his face and he followed as his legs moved him over her and his arm held him up. After she took her hands from his cheeks he started to kiss her from her forehead to her chin. She felt the bow on her kimono start to loosen as he pulled the end that was sticking out from behind her. She put her hand down to stop his.

"No Sesshoumaru. I...I...I'm not ready for that yet."

She heard a small growl escape from the back of his throat.

"I'm sorry."

"You need not be sorry. I am sorry for not controlling myself," he said rocking back onto his knees as she slid herself from under him.

"It is not your fault." She smiled shyly.

"That is my Rin," he said as one of his few small smiles appeared.

"It is all because of you."

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The spring flowers were out and Rin wanted to pick some to put in their room. She walked into the garden and took a deep breath through her nose as she did every time she walked into it. The winter months were a hard one for her and Sesshoumaru. She remembered how he wanted to be with her many times and she turned him down. She just didn't feel like it. And she became snippy at him for no reason. She didn't like herself when she did that to him when he was just helping her. Then he had to leave her. There was a battle brewing between him and the Lord of the Eastern Lands. She hadn't seen him since then and that was four months ago.

"I wonder how he is," she said then laughed. If someone looked at her as this moment it would seem like she was talking to the flowers.

"I am fine."

A smile formed across her face as she stood up turned towards him. She wanted to run, but she calmed herself down. 'I am a Lady and a Lady doesn't run like that.' It was a good thing she didn't run because it gave him a chance to take off his armor so she could fully hug him. She grabbed him under his arms as he put his on her head.

"Welcome back."

"Hmm."

"What's wrong, my Lord."

"Everything is fine, my Rin," he said with an uneasy tone.

"Liar. I know you to well," she said as she let go and moved back to look him in the eyes. "Did everything go well with him?"

"For now."

"How long is that?" she asked as she took is hand and walked with him off the path into their own little corner. Once there she pulled her body close to him and kissed him from his neck up to his lips.

"Are you sure?" he asked when they parted.

She nodded and backed up to the tree that was behind her and pulled her kimono off her shoulders. She could see come towards her with that look in his eyes and smiled.

Afterwards they were lying on the ground, underneath the tree, in each other's arms.

"I've been waiting for this for a long time," she said as she played with his hair. "I love being with you."

"And I with you."

"I want to have a baby. I want to try again."

She felt him stiffen and then relax. He started to move to sit up so she let go of his hair and he sat up.

"What is it, my Sesshoumaru?"

"Are you sure about this?"

"Yes. I am better. I am stronger. I am ready." He looked at her and smiled. She smiled back. "I love it when you smile at me, Sesshoumaru."

"I love you, my Rin."

"I love you too," she said as he leaned in closer.

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Rin's heart skipped a beat. 'How can he do this to me? He makes me want him more and more,' she thought as their bodies glistened from the morning sun filtering into their room. It was already warm this morning and he made her hot. She lied on the bed with the covers down at her feet.

"My Lord!" she said as her breathing became steadier.

"My Lady," he said as he kissed her forehead.

"You should go to the bathhouse before they come," she continued.

"You should also," he said with a sly smile.

She got up and put on the robe. She fanned her hand near her face, "It's so hot in here. I hate how it warm it can get in the summer. I like the spring." She watched as he put on his robe and then grabbed his hand as they started to walk to the bathhouse.

"Do you think I will be pregnant soon?" she looked down at her feet. "I can't believe it's taking this long. I want him to come."

"Him?"

She looked up and saw is confused look. "Yeah. I want you to have a son. Then we can have a girl. That way he can look out for her."

"I see you have planned this out," he said.

"I have. I've been planning ever since that day in April." She blushed thinking about what happened in the garden the day he came back.

After they washed up, they returned to the room and dressed.

"I can't believe they finally decided to visit me. I'm so excited to see Sango. I haven't seen her since...since...since then." She turned and looked at him devilishly.

Aren't you excited to be seeing your brother again?"

"Half brother. That hanyou is not my full brother," he said as he but the swords into the yellow sash. She giggled. "What is so funny, my Rin?"

"You," she said as she put down the brush and put on the bracelet.
"I am not funny."

"Oh, stop acting all tough. I know behind that hard exterior there is a little softy just waiting to come out."

"And where might that be," he said walking to her.

"Why should I tell you, my Sesshoumaru," she teased. She knew how much he hated to be teased.

"Rin!" he growled.

She gave him a kiss on his cheek to calm him down and turned to walk to the door. He caught her arm and pulled her back playfully.

"Why do you tempt me so?" he asked as he kissed her.

"Sesshoumaru-sama! They are here, Sesshoumaru-sama!" yelled the little demon from outside their door.

They both let go of each other. Jaken was like an unwanted bucket of ice cold water that was just poured on them.

"I guess we're done. Such a pity," she said with a wink. He growled.

She opened the door and greeted Jaken with a scowl. She happily went downstairs, knowing her friends were going to be there. She smiled as she rounded the corner to greet them and saw Kagome standing with a baby in her arms.

"Kagome! How come I didn't know?! I feel so foolish! Congratulations!" She walked up closer. "What is his name?"

"Sumio. Would you like to hold him?" she asked smiling.

"Sure!" as Kagome placed the baby in her arms she continued to greet the others. "Sango! How are you? How are all your children? Thinking about anymore?"

"I'm fine. They are fine. And no, I think eight is enough," she said as she playfully hit Miroku.

"How come you guys didn't have all your children come?" She looked as Sumio sleeping in her arms. 'I want one so much.' She sighed.

"I didn't want my pups around him," Inuyasha scoffed.

"Well, I wanted to get away," commented Sango.

"That's too bad. It would have been fun." She turned around knowing he was waiting far behind. "Come. Look at her baby."

He slowly walked closer. A playful grin came across her face and she handed him the child.

"Don't give him my pup!" yelled Inuyasha. Rin heard him take a breath to say something else. "Glufff."

"He's not going to hurt him, stupid!" yelled Kagome.

Rin giggled, but kept looking at Sesshoumaru. The baby started to cry and he flinched at the sound. The child moved his arms uncontrollably and came across his fluffy boa. He grabbed onto it and brought it closer to face then turned his head and started to chew on it.

"Please take him from me now," he said handing Sumio awkwardly back to Rin.

"But he likes you, my Lord," she pleaded, but took him anyway. He started to cry again after Sesshoumaru took the boa from his little hands. She turned around and handed him back to Kagome. She reached back without turning around for his hand. When she found it she pulled him closer. She felt him squeeze back and she smiled.

"It is almost time for lunch. I asked the servants to set it up as a picnic. I hope you guys don't mind."

"I don't mind," said Sango. She came closer and wrapped her arms around Rin. "I think we need to talk."

"About what?"

"What do you think? You are always going to be my friend and sister- in-law so..." she held it there for a minute.

"So it's time for girl talk!" Kagome chimed in on the other side of her.

"Oh," said Rin a little startled. She noticed Kagome's arm was around her also. "Where is Sumio?"

"I gave him to Inuyasha. Now let's talk!"

They pulled her from his hand and they walked towards the door to the garden.

"Keh! The one who hates hanyous is going to have one himself!" ridiculed Inuyasha as he stood on the other side of Miroku who thought it was a good idea to have someone in between the two brothers.

The three women turned around with Rin as the pivot point.

"What did you say?" asked Rin as Sesshoumaru growled openly at Inuyasha.

"Rin, I am sorry this hanyou could not keep his mouth shut, but yes it is true."

Her face slowly went into her signature smile; a smile that almost threatened to take over her entire face. She busted out from the girls' hold and ran straight into his arms.

"That's ok, my Sesshoumaru," she cried into his chest. She felt his hand go to her head and felt the unmistakable feel of his lips. 'I can't believe he's doing that...in public!'

"Before you say anything, Inuyasha, I'd advise you to remember who is in your arms," said Miroku.

'Thank you Miroku,' she thought as she breathed a sigh of relief.

"Now we have more to talk about," cried Sango as they came and took her from his embrace.

"Wait!" She ran back to him and kissed him on his cheek and then took a second to look into his eyes. The usual amber color was brighter than she had ever seen it before. She was about to say something when they came back and started to pull her away again so all she managed to say was, "Omph."

The food was delicious, but Rin couldn't stop thinking about the baby inside. 'What will it be like? Is it a boy? Is it a girl? Will he love him or her? Will I be sick again? Will the baby die? No! I have to think positive. He will be in my arms in no time!' She smiled at the thought of her sitting on the bed with the baby in her arms and Sesshoumaru lovingly playing with him. 'I know he would never do that, but he always knows how to surprise me.'

"Rin. Rin," she heard Sango call her.

"Yeah," she perked her head up and looked at her.

"You've been thinking about the baby this whole time, haven't you?"

She smiled. "I can't stop. I'm so excited. Although," she looked at Inuyasha glaringly, "I would have liked to find out for myself. My Lord knows I like to."
"I'm sorry Rin, but my husband doesn't know how to keep his mouth closed," said Kagome who was now glaring at him.

Miroku laughed and Inuyasha just sat there sulking.

"That's all right. I have wanted this since the spring. I think I was going to go insane if it didn't happen soon, but I'm not complaining." She winked at Sesshoumaru. He quickly averted his eyes and she smiled. Sumio started crying and Rin waved Kagome away so she could pick him up.

She sang him the lullaby she sang Kohaku all the time and he quieted down. She closed her eyes and felt a tear roll down her cheek.

"Are you ok," asked Kagome.

She opened her eyes, "Yes. I'm sorry. I was just thinking about Kohaku. That was his favorite lullaby." She laughed. "He always tried to get Sesshoumaru to sing it to him."

"Keh!" spouted Inuyasha.

Rin continued, "The day he was killed he called for Sesshoumaru for the first time. He called him Sess-so-momo." Inuyasha laughed hysterically followed by a loud growl by Sesshoumaru that made him stop begrudgingly. "I can't wait for this one to do it too."

"Our son shall never do that. He will know better," he said with his usual tone.

"He will be a child. He needs to be a child. Don't you make him grow up before it's time!" She took his chin in her right hand. "You understand that?" She quickly kissed him and then let go and smiled.

He growled for what seemed liked the hundredth time that day.

"I win!" she said laughing.

She saw the others look on with awe from the corner of her left eye. The only thing she could do was to continue to laugh. Her laughing fit was cut short by a rumbling in the distance. "The clouds are really rolling in," stated Miroku. "We should get in before it sta-"

Just then the clouds opened up on them and they ran for the palace. Once in Inuyasha, forgetting his manners, shook himself off like a dog.

"Inuyasha, you fool!" roared Sesshoumaru. "You are getting everything wet!"

"I only see wet people standing here! I don't think they will mind." He paused and in his most obnoxious voice said the rest. "I'm sorry for getting the lord all wet. I know how much he hates that. I wouldn't want to make him mad, would I? I don't want to have to take your other arm off!"

"You better watch it, hanyou!" His eyes started to become red. "I could kill you with one slash of my hand before you put your hand on that scrawny sword!"

Rin gave Sumio back to Kagome and they rushed to their mate's sides.

"Calm down, Inuyasha. That was stupid of you to do that in here."

"My Lord, please, he did not mean to upset you," she said, but his eyes were not looking at him and they were still red.

"Yes he did. He could not be civilized for just one day."

Rin took his head and forcefully made him look at her. "Please. For me? For our baby?" She saw the red start to fade away as he looked at her.

"You two are so much alike," commented Miroku. The two brothers growled at him as a slap was heard. "I haven't felt that in years," he said nostalgically.

"And you will get another one if you don't shut up!" scolded Sango.

After they put on some dry clothes and hung their wet ones in Rin's old bedroom they went into the great room to talk.

"Sesshoumaru-sama!" Jaken came waddling in.

"What is it, Jaken," he answered.

"The Lord of the Northern Lands is here, my Lord. I sent him to your study."

He stood up and regally walked out of the room.

"I do not want to leave right now," the people in the great room heard Sesshoumaru say.

"It is important, Sesshoumaru. He is attacking the South. Their forces cannot hold him off for long. We need you and your soldiers," said the other voice.

Rin tensed up. 'I don't want you to leave me. Not now.'

Kagome must have notice the look on her face. "It's going to be ok."

"Yeah, I'm sure it is," Sango chimed in.

She saw Inuyasha roll his eyes and Kagome picked up on it, "Inuyasha!"

"I didn't do anything this time!"

"Yes you did!"

"Hmmf," he pouted as he crossed his arms over his chest.

She heard his steps come back into the room.

"Rin. I have to go because o-"

"I know. I heard," she said unemotionally, standing up and turning around to face him.

"I am sorry, my Rin, for leaving you at this time." He pulled her close.

"Sesshoumaru. What are you doing?" she whispered.

He reached his hand down to her cheek and held it there letting his thumb move across it a couple of times. He reached down and gave her a kiss on her forehead and then whispered towards her ear. "I love you, my wife, my mate, my Lady. My Rin." And with that he let her go and walked out in a hurry.

She ran to the door and cried down the hallway, "I love you too, my Sesshoumaru."

"Are you going to all right staying by yourself?" asked Sango.

"Yes. Some of the servants are my friends. I will be fine," she lied even though they knew how she really felt.

"If you want some company, don't be afraid to come," said Kagome as they walked out the front door and into the horse drawn wagon. She waved goodbye and watched them until they fell out of sight. She turned around and walked back in leisurely.

She took a big sigh and held it. She let it go while thinking about what was going to and what might happen. 'I wonder how long he is going to be away. I hope he doesn't stay away too long. I hope everything goes as planned for him. Gods, please watch over him and this new baby.' She yawned. 'I guess I will go to bed early since there is nothing to do.'

She walked up to their bedroom and changed into her sleep clothes. She crept into bed and uttered to the walls before she feel asleep. "Come back to me Sesshoumaru."