InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ The Ubiquitous Plot – A Parody ❯ The Ubiquitous Plot – A Parody ( Chapter 1 )

I did not create and do not own these characters.

 

Warnings: OOC for at least one character, italics abuse, snark

 

AN:

I'm sure this has been done before, but I needed the catharsis. Here is my frustration of all the “Kag sees Inu (kissing/screwing/declaring undying love for) Kikyo and runs awaaay!!!1!1!11one” fics. And all of their ten bazillion inbred cousins (fics, not authors!). I mean no harm to anyone in any way. It's just meant to be fun. I also wrote it while asleep. Really.

 

The Ubiquitous Plot - A Parody

(or at least a snark at)

 

 

Kagome laboriously heaved herself out of the well. Why hadn't Inuyasha come to get her? He said he would, and he usually did anyway even if he didn't say it. She could sure use the hand. That backpack was damned heavy! She wouldn't have packed all that Ramen for him if she'd known she would have to carry it all… Where was he?

 

Her answer arrived in the ghostly lights of souls and soul-collectors. Kagome's inquisitive nature and slightly masochistic tendencies compelled her to investigate. She never even remotely guessed at what she'd find.

 

She saw them. On the ground. Atop Inuyasha's haori. Together. Panting, sweating, their eyes locked in an intense, heated gaze. They were so intent on each other, they hadn't even noticed her yet!

 

Kagome shrieked and ran.

 

Hours later, with dawn only minutes away, Inuyasha dragged himself back to the village. He really, really didn't want to face Kagome after what she saw. He had no idea how to explain this. He couldn't even seem to explain to her that, well, Kikyo… He could never deny her anything she asked of him, no matter how exhausting, or how difficult her clay body made things (made his part of things difficult, anyway). His entire right arm felt numb. But he couldn't just deny her her satisfaction, could he? It was only fair.

 

He thought his arm was going to fall off.

 

Inuyasha absently reached across his body and rubbed his abused shoulder as he trudged down the dusty path.

 

Her body wasn't even real. How could he hope to do what she asked? This was all just a twisted offshoot of her competitive nature, anyway! Inuyasha ignored the small part of him that was relieved that, when Kagome arrived, he'd been the one on top, thoroughly dominating Kikyo. For that round anyway.

 

It would have been so humiliating if anyone, especially Kagome, ever saw a human woman beat him in arm wrestling!

 

AN: Not so much “human” woman anymore, but it's all the same to Inuyasha. *shrug*

That's it! Flame away!