InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ The Way Ice Can Turn Into Sun ❯ Do Youkai Have Feelings? ( Chapter 5 )

Chapter 5: Do youkai have feelings?

 

 

The demon lord returned to Jaken and Ah-Un.

“Oh, Sesshoumaru-sama! Where have you been?” His loyal servant came running.

“Silence, Jaken.” He replied walking past him and laying Kumiko on the ground against Ah-Un.

“But, Sesshoumaru-sama, what happened to the human?” Jaken couldn't suppress his curiosity.

“Jaken. I do not wish to be disturbed. Leave us. Now.” His cold voice rang in the silent night.

“As you wish, my Lord.” Jaken walked away silently.

The taiyoukai was worried about Kumiko. She still hadn't regained consciousness. Her incredible power had impressed him more then he would have liked to admit. He knew she had great power, but what she had just done was beyond great, it was amazing. He did feel something for her, he could deny that no longer, but still...a human...

Would he be subjected to the same destiny as his father? He despised his father's relationship with that human woman so much. He died for that woman. The demon lord thought it was pitiful at the time. Would he repeat his father's mistake? Was it a mistake? He didn't know what to believe anymore. His feelings for Kumiko confused him greatly.

A low sound alerted him to her awaking. In a second he was next to her with one knee on the ground, holding her up:

“Sesshoumaru...You're safe...The youkai...” her voice was merely a whisper.

She was worried about him? In her condition, she thought of him first? His cold heart was the one that was beating faster this time. She was truly a unique creature.

“I'm fine. The youkai are gone. You purified them all.” He answered in a soft voice.

“I did?” she asked seeming surprised. “Of course, they were nothing for one such as myself” she added, smiling with irony.

He smiled back and lifted her into his lap with his arms held tightly around her.

“Are you better?” he asked.

“No.” she answered slowly turning her dark eyes to meet his twin suns.

”I'm hungry.” she added with a grin.

She scared him for a moment. He smiled again, amazed by her power to make him happy.

“Jaken.” He called.

“Yes, Sesshoumaru-sama!” his servant came running.

“Go find human food.” He said and watched her with a little grin of his own. “Lots of it.”

She started laughing and her laugh tickled his ears. It was the most wonderful sound he had ever heard.

“Are the others ok? I mean, your brother and Kagome.” She asked.

The use of the word “brother” made him feel uneasy but he answered.

“They are fine.”

“I see my wound was bandaged, I suppose Kagome did it. It doesn't hurt; she really is good at this.” She said touching her bandage.

“I am glad.” He replied.

She wanted to ask him about Inuyasha, she knew it would probably be a sensitive subject but since he was so nice tonight, maybe...

“Your brother seems...energetic.” she said in lack of something better to describe Inuyasha. “You don't like each other very much, do you?”

Her question surprised him. It was too straight forward, but she would eventually find out anyway.

“My brother is not like me. He is a hanyou, a half-breed. His mother was human.”

“So that's why you don't like him?” she asked looking a bit offended.

“You do not understand.” He replied turning his eyes away from her.

“Explain it to me.”

Sesshoumaru's gaze seemed far away, as he answered:

“My father died because of Inuyasha's mother. He was injured and yet he would have survived if he hadn't given his life to protect her.”

“Oh...” she didn't know what to say. She felt compassion for Sesshoumaru and a part of her felt happy thinking he was capable of feelings. He must have loved his father very much.

“I'm sorry.” She said softly leaning her head against his chest.

“Why? It is not your fault.” He replied absently.

“I'm sorry for you.”

His body tensed as he replied knitting his brows:

“I have no need for anyone's pity.”

“It's not pity!” she shot. He really didn't understand anything when it came to feelings.

He seemed to relax a little so she added in a low voice:

“If your father gave his life to save that woman, he must have truly loved her.”

Sesshoumaru remained silent, as his golden orbs seemed to look through her.

“Can't you accept that?” she asked searching his eyes.

His silence was the answer.

“Because she was human?” she knitted her brows.

He didn't answer. Instead, he gently released her from his lap and got up.

“I said too much.” she thought.

He turned away from her and walked towards a near-by lake.

“He was so nice and now...I don't know what to believe anymore.” She thought with a sad look on her face as she leaned against Ah-Un. She had started to care for the dragon a great deal, it was always so gentle with her...unlike the master, she thought. Slowly, despite the thoughts clouding up in her head, her eyes got heavy and sleep claimed her.

 

The demon lord was looking at his reflection in the lake's waters. Her question had disturbed him. He thought about the reasons for which he disliked his half-brother. The fact that he had been sealed by a human for 50 years and unable to help him protect their father's lands was part of it, but mostly...the fact that he was a hanyou. In addition, he had almost hated his father for his relationship with that human woman.

He despised humans...but he didn't despise her, or Rin. But how to make her understand that...maybe his opinion of humans was wrong. Nevertheless, it was hard to throw away something that he had believed his whole life.

He saw himself in the clear waters. His appearance had human form, only because he wished it to. He was still different from them because of his long silver hair, golden eyes and purple stripes on his face, symbol of his lineage. He tightened his fist and sank his claws into his own flesh. Claws that were harder than steel and cut better than a sword. His wound healed instantly.

He turned away from his reflection, furious. Humans were weak pathetic creatures. He hated her for making everything suddenly so complicated. No. He didn't hate her. On the contrary.

He returned and saw her sleeping peacefully, cuddled into Ah-Un. The dragon was wrapped around her protectively, just as he did with Rin. He didn't mind she was human. The food Jaken had brought while he was away was lying next to her untouched. Was it his fault? He regretted making her feel uneasy. He offended her and he was sorry.

The demon lord sighed heavily for the first time in his life and sat down in front of her, watching her.

When the sun began to rise, he got up, knowing she would wake soon. He did not want to face her now.

He woke up Jaken with a kick and instructed him:

“We are not walking further today. I have some business. Take care of the girl. If she is harmed in any way, you will suffer the consequences.”

Jaken quickly answered:

“Yes, Sesshoumaru-sama! I, Jaken, will guard her with my life!”

“So be it.” He said coldly and departed.

 

Kumiko woke up and yawned heavily. Sesshoumaru was missing. Jaken waved his staff towards her and yelled:

“Lord Sesshoumaru told me we are not going anywhere today! So eat your food and rest, useless human!”

She would have to do something about his insults. It wouldn't take much to purify the little toad, but she had other things on her mind so she just took the bowl and started eating absently.

The day was pretty boring without Sesshoumaru around, she noticed. She couldn't wander off to far away because of Jaken's constant supervision and there wasn't anything to do but play with Ah-Un. She needed a bath really bad, but with Jaken here she wasn't sure she would be comfortable.

She thought about Sesshoumaru. She was beginning to develop feelings for him and she didn't want that. He didn't seem too fond of humans and she understood nothing of his attitude recently. He was sometimes nice and almost sweet just to turn into an unreadable block of ice at the slightest personal question. She didn't want to get attached to him, she would probably get hurt.

Still she was glad when she saw the taiyoukai returning. At least it wouldn't be so boring.
”He sure took his time.” she thought. It was almost sundown.

He didn't even spare her a glance as he sat down on a rock. He remained silent and cold. She couldn't take that any longer.

She walked up to him, determined, and put one knee down in front of him. Looking directly into his eyes she asked:

“Do you hate humans?”

Her bold question surprised him, but his face remained unreadable. Silence fell for a few moments until his answer came:

“I don't hate you.”

“I am human.” She stated the obvious.

“I know.” He replied sustaining her gaze.

She searched his eyes trying to find something, any sign of a feeling. The golden orbs remained as emotionless as ever.

She got up and turned her back on him. “Ugh! He's unbearable!” She said to herself. She wanted to get away from him, as far away as she could.

Sesshoumaru didn't stop her.

She walked towards the huge lake, surrounding the shore until she thought she had reached a good distance.

She looked around. She was alone. He hadn't followed her. She almost felt like breaking into tears, but held it back. Instead, she got undressed and stepped into the cold waters of the lake. No monster was there. She had learned to feel a youkai's presence.

“Why do I even care...” she asked herself already knowing the answer. She had feelings for him and the fact that he considered her a lesser creature really hurt.

“It's all my fault anyway...” she thought, angry at herself. “I always knew he despised humans...”

She sunk her head under water to get her hair wet and then swam to a deeper place. She could barely touch the bottom of the lake now and only her head was on the surface. The cold water made her feel better so she sank her head again.

When she emerged from the water, she saw Sesshoumaru's white form on the shore in front of her. She almost chocked from the unexpected shock but regained her senses quick enough. She was angry with him, what the hell was he doing here?

He sensed her anger and his hand reached to one of his swords.

“He wants to kill me now?” was her first thought but seeing he had laid the sword on the grass and was pulling out the second one to apply it the same treatment she realized her thought was stupid.

Now he was unstrapping his armor and laying it next to his swords. He did the same thing with his haori remaining naked from the waist up. His body was perfect, it was well built, but not overly buff, it was just right and his skin was flawless.

He slowly got in the water and walked towards her.

“What ARE you doing?” she yelled, realizing she was naked. “Get out NOW!”

She was frightened, he could smell it. She feared that he would take her. No, that's not what he wanted. He continued to walk towards her through the water and stopped right in front of her. While the water was covering everything but her head, it barely past his waist.

“Get out!” she yelled again, but is seemed to have no effect on him. “Please” she tried in a lower voice.

“What you fear will not happen.” He finally spoke. “If I had wanted that I would have done it already.”

She blushed and looked disturbed that he had said it so easily.

The demon lord turned around and got out of the water. His icy eyes captured hers.

“Get out.” He ordered.

“Are you serious? Turn around and wait until I get dressed. If you don't, I'm not coming out!” she snapped.

She was so stubborn, he thought. He could go get her out himself, but that would ruin what he was about to do. He turned around.

She got out and put her clothes on extremely fast. When he figured that she was done, he approached her and wrapped a hand around her waist pulling her closer to him. She could feel the warmth of his skin and hear his heart beating, was it beating a little faster than usual or was it her imagination?

She was still angry with him because of his opinion about her kind and his insufferable attitude of superiority.

“You shouldn't dirty your hands by touching a human.” She shot knitting her brows and turning her head away from him.

“Woman, do you ever shut up?” came his low, calm voice as his other hand turned her face to him more aggressively than he had intended.

She lifted her gaze to meet his and his amber eyes were warm.

He felt her heart racing against his bare skin. It pleased him. To his surprise, he heard her voice asking:

“Do Youkai have feelings?”

A few days ago he would have simply answered “No.” But now, looking in her dark eyes and feeling her so close he answered:

“Youkai do not give in to their every emotion, like humans.”

“Then you lie to yourselves.” She replied calmly.

He had never thought about it that way. Perhaps she was right. He tilted her chin up and leaned closer to her. She could feel his breath on her skin and his eyes were shining in a strange way.

“What are you doing?” her voice was a whisper on his skin.

“I have decided to stop lying to myself” he whispered back.

He held her tighter, drawing her closer to him and his lips touched hers gently at first, but then more and more firmly. His tongue caressed her lips, opening them and exploring her mouth. Her heart was beating with incredible speed as she returned the kiss and she felt shivers all over her body.

He kissed her more and more passionately, like he couldn't get enough. His blood was boiling, wanting to taste her whole body, to make her his. His mouth left her lips and started to descend on her neck. His tongue caressed her skin and he bit it gently, feeling her incredibly fast heartbeat. He kept descending on her collar bone, his arms slowly pushing her kimono open as his mouth tasted her. The lines of her breasts became visible and his hot, wet mouth descended slowly on to them. Her hands became rigid and she stopped breathing.

No, he couldn't stop now, his instincts had taken over. “Only a weak demon cannot control the urges of his blood.” He disciplined himself raising his head to meet her eyes.

“No...” she whispered looking into his eyes.

“Why?” He asked not understanding.

Was that fear in her scent?

She was trembling and her voice was low when she replied:

“Not yet...”

His golden orbs pierced into hers as if to see into her soul and he suddenly enclosed his arms around her tightly. Her face had such innocence. He wouldn't lose her by doing something foolish.

“I understand.” He said simply holding her in his arms.

Her breath was heavy and slow, but she sustained his gaze without blinking. He took her into his arms and sat down against a tree, holding her in his lap.

“You must rest.” He said in a soft voice.

“And you should put your clothes on, it's really cold!” she replied seeming concerned.

He held her tighter against his bear skin and answered:

“I'm warm.”

And so he was. His skin was soft and she let her head rest on his shoulder. She felt happy and safe as his clawed hand caressed her wet hair. She fell asleep in no time.

 

Naraku was watching everything with apparent interest through Kanna's mirror.

Another plan had started to form in his brilliant twisted mind. It would be harder to acquire the miko, now that she had Sesshoumaru's protection, but in doing so he would catch two birds with one stone. He wanted the demon lord's powers, but was unable to absorb him. Now he only wanted him out of the way as he was by far his most dangerous enemy. His weak spot, the little human brat, was not traveling with him anymore and he had not found her. But now the mighty youkai lord had another weak spot... The taiyoukai considered himself above everyone else... He would have the woman of his desires and he would have her willingly. He grinned with satisfaction as the plan started to take form in his mind.

 

N/A: Reviewer response:

Frau: I'm glad you enjoyed it, I'll try not to let any more errors escape the spell check, but the little devils always seem to find a way. They're clever.

Story Tellers: I never abandon a story, if you ever see one of my stories abandoned, it means I died. And yeah I know I only got one story now, but there's more on the way. I'm happy you like.