InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ The Woman I Call My Wife ❯ Christmas ( Chapter 5 )

Disclaimer: InuYasha and its characters belong to Takahashi Rumiko, other characters belong to me =3 (except maybe Ruri =p)

 

Merry Christmas everyone!
I know it's late, but I hope you spent it with the ones you love.

 

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I'm really not a morning person.

 

At least not when Kagome isn't in bed with me...

 

Stupid bitch...leaving me alone for a whole day...

 

“There's just a few more last minute things I need to get,” she pleads, the early morning darkness casting a blue hue over our room.

“No! Kagome, we have enough crap already!”

“Please, InuYasha?” she kisses my cheek and keeps kissing until she gets to my jaw.

 

Nuh-uh. Not falling for that one!

“I said no, and no matter how much you try to...” she sucks on the column of my throat, running her tongue over my Adam's apple the way I love her to, “...convince me,” she smiles when I swallow hard and it bobs up and down.

 

No! I'm not that easy!

“It won't take long...” she says absentmindedly, moving south from my neck to put wet kisses on my collarbone, “...and when I come back,” she begins suggestively. She lets the phrase dangle in the air between us until I'm about ready to suffocate.

“When you come back...?” I ask, trying my hardest to keep the desperate hopefulness out of my voice.

“When I come back...” she continues, licking the space down the centre of my chest and then leaving a trail towards a nipple. I close my eyes and she flicks it with her tongue, swirls those little swirls around it that drive me absolutely insane. “When I come back, there will be a present for you, too,” her mouth covers my sensitive spot and she sucks.

 

My voice wavers a little and I swallow to keep it steady, “Yeah? What kind of present?”

She releases my nipple with a cute `pop' and smiles up at me, her hands resting on my chest.

 

“A special one.”

 

The sunlight bursts through the little gap in the curtains and spears my eyes tightly shut. I can hear those annoying carolers singing Jingle Bells in the doorways down the street and I can hear their feet sloshing through the snow. Of course. It's almost Christmas. The crisp smell of morning and cold covers the room and my damn blanket isn't thick enough.

 

Fucking goose bumps.

 

I kick the cover off. My long pajama pants have climbed all the way up to my thighs and my legs are fucking freezing. With my luck the heater's broken.

 

Stupid Cold...Stupid Wench out spending all my money on Stupid Presents...

 

Stupid.

 

The carolers keep singing. It gets louder as they get closer to my house...and still the same damn song. It'll be stuck in my head all day.

 

I sit up in bed and yawn, stretching out the stiffness in my muscles that a cold night's sleep brings. My feet touch the carpeted floor, cushioned and comfortable, and as I stand my pajama pants slide down my legs to their original position, the blue flannelette material getting caught at my knees on the way down. I head to the bathroom and I catch my unfortunate reflection in the mirror. The harsh white light in the bathroom makes the bags under my eyes look like giant sacks.

 

I'm getting old.

 

And they're still singing that damn song.

 

“Oh, jingle bells, jingle bells,
Jingle all the way,
Oh, what fun it is to ride,
In a one horse open sleigh--”

 

Kai bursts open his window in the crisp morning air and yells at the top of his lungs.

 

“SHUT THE FUCK UP!”

 

And they stop singing. Gotta love teenagers.

 

My reflection smiles at me and I dip my head to splash my face once the running water goes warm. I straighten up again and it's still smiling, the dead silence sounding much better than the 44th repeat of Jingle Bells. The fluffy white hand towel by the basin feels soft on my face as I soak up the water and drown in the smell of my wife.

 

Oh god.

 

I still fucking love it.

 

My son calls me from the kitchen down the hall, “Dad! How long has the orange juice been in the fridge?”

 

I watch myself in the mirror as I answer, the lines on my forehead looking much more prominent than last I checked as I frown, “I dunno...smell it!”

 

A pause and them some coughing from the kitchen.

 

Kai's reply comes, “Oh fuck, it smells like shit!”

 

“So throw it out!”

 

“The bin is full!”

 

I sigh and roll my eyes at myself, “So take the trash out!”

 

The rustle of plastic.

 

“Ah shit, it's dripping!”

 

“So clean it up! And stop fucking swearing!”

 

“Guh, fine!”

 

He slams the door behind him in true adolescent style and I pull my pajamas off and change into warmer clothes as fast as possible to avoid the damn cold. I step out of our room and down the hall, hugging myself for warmth. A hot chocolate would be great right now...

 

But mine aren't anywhere near as good as Kagome's.

 

I settle for my half-assed mixture of chocolate flavored dust and hot water mixed together in a mug. I take a sip and the scalding temperature attacks my tongue right away. I recoil as a reflex and the drink splashes out of the mug and onto the white fluffy dog slippers Kagome bought me last Christmas and onto the kitchen floor.

 

“Ah, fuck.” I manage through a burnt tongue.

 

Kai clears his throat from the doorway, “What a great example you're setting,” he drawls, rolling his eyes and moving to line the bin with a new bag, “Neither of us is allowed to swear, you know.” He sighs and straightens up, walking over to the fridge and burying himself in it in the search for breakfast. “Where's mom?” He asks, more so questioning the lack of a good mom-made breakfast rather than the personal absence of his mother.

 

“Keh,” I set the hot, hot, hot chocolate aside and go about pouring myself a glass of cold, cold water, “Out shopping again with your sister.”

 

Buying more Stupid Presents and Stupid Things.

 

Kai emerges from the fridge with milk (that hasn't expired - he checked) and pours himself a bowl of cereal, setting it on the kitchen bench and leaning over it with a spoon, smirking and looking far too much like me. His black hair is messy and falling around his face and shoulders. “Oh,” he says, his face going serious and the volume of his voice dropping, “Have you wrapped mom's present?”

 

I slap my hand to my forehead, “Gah, I forgot!” and I pause to take in the tingly feeling of freezing water on my burnt tongue.

 

The secrecy of the conversation was suddenly forgotten and he raises his voice, “Dad! What if she finds it! We need to get it wrapped and under the tree so she doesn't see it before Christmas!”

 

“Oh, wait!” Now I remember why I haven't wrapped it yet, “I was waiting for the last one to be developed so I could put it in the back...”

 

Why am I explaining myself to a 17-year-old?

“Well when will it be done? It can't take that long to develop a stupid photo,” His irritated eyes flick to his mobile phone at the end of the counter and then back to me, “and does it really have to be in there? I'd rather not have a record of me in a Christmas hat...” He curses under his breath as he spills some milk and cereal on the bench, his hands clenching into fists. Why the hell is he so pissed off about a photo?

 

I just stare at him for a bit. I notice his eyes are slightly bloodshot. I notice the frustration on his face; the depth of his frown and that something else in his golden eyes. Unfocused. Confused.

 

Kai...what the hell is wrong with you?

 

And then realization dawns on my like a harsh slap to my face. It stings. Leaves a red mark.

 

“Are you doing drugs?”

 

He recoils off the kitchen bench in a heartbeat, his face screwing up, “What!? No!” he looks so much bigger now than I remember, as if he had suddenly grown into a young man overnight. “Are you stupid? Why would I be taking drugs? Just `cause I'm a teenager you assume--? You don't know anything!” When did he get so tall?

 

I look at him more closely, setting down my glass and taking a step towards him. “Kai...what's wrong?”

 

You're shaking...

 

He frowns; his teeth bared a little, “Nothing! It's none of your business!” He snatches up his phone from the bench.

 

And then he storms down the hall into his room and slams the door.

Fucking teenagers.

 

 

***

 

 

She smiles that brilliant smile.

 

“Ok, so this one's for Miroku.” She explains, her arm disappearing into a shopping bag and emerging again with a packaged up mini telescope. I want to whine and complain, because we already bought Miroku a present.

 

But her smile...I never want to argue with that smile.

 

It's just like her mother's.

 

“Ruri...” I complain, slumping over the table. All I can do is sit back and watch as the pile on its surface grows. More presents. More Christmas Joy. I sigh. “Go wrap them all and get them under the tree, ok?”

 

Her little blue eyes light up, “I get to wrap them all by myself?”

 

I reach out to ruffle her silky dark hair but she pulls away, frowning and lifting a hand to the shiny new clips in her hair. Red and green with little silver bells. Sometimes I forget she's not like Kai. I notice her dress matches the Christmas theme. No doubt something Kagome picked out. It's a pretty dress; the dark Christmas colours suit her. My little girl.

 

Nothing like Kai.

 

“Yeah, you can wrap them all by yourself!” I say enthusiastically, smiling.

 

Smiles come so easily to me these days.

 

Her face lights up like a Christmas tree, “Alright!” and she digs into the shopping bag to pull out new wrapping paper (yes, we ran out) and the scissors and sticky tape from the cupboard in the kitchen.

 

“Careful,” I warn, when she climbs up onto the bench to reach it.

And then comes Kagome's scolding voice, “InuYasha! What's Ruri doing up on the bench!?” she appears through the hallway, having gone to change into more comfortable clothes. She takes the 10-year-old gently from the waist and puts her down on the plushy carpet next to me, then sets the sticky tape and scissors on the table in front of our daughter.

 

“It's ok mommy, I can do it myself,” the girl boasts, “I'm old enough now, you know.”

“I know you can, baby,” Kagome smiles, rubbing Ruri's back, “Just be careful with the scissors, ok?” she pulls out a chair and sighs as she sits down, her legs no doubt sore from walking around for so many hours. She turns to me, looking over Ruri sitting between us, her chair tucked right in and already wrapping her first present, “Mommy needs a foot rub.”

 

I narrow my eyes at her and she smiles mischievously.

 

“Mhm,” Ruri chimes in, “Mommy was working hard today!”

 

Oh great. She's got reinforcements now.

 

“Please, daddy?” Kagome says, lifting a gorgeous leg and wiggling her toes at me. I look at her like she's my worst enemy and then she smiles, lifting that beautiful leg a little higher so that her long pants slide down towards her knee and reveal a smooth calf. Her eyes darken and my insides start to feel hot.

 

I shift my chair towards her and her feet are in my lap in a heartbeat.

 

Damn.

 

How the hell did you do that, Kagome?

 

I start working on her worn feet and I watch Ruri finish wrapping the mini telescope for Miroku. “So is all the shopping done now?” I ask; my hands busy making Kagome feel like the queen that she is. My queen.

 

My wife.

 

“I think so,” she says, sighing and slumping back into her chair and closing her eyes. “Hm, where's Kai?” she asks all of a sudden.

 

My hands stop massaging and the little smile I had on my lips dies down.

 

“In his room.” I tell her, my solemn voice no doubt making her worry.

 

She pulls her feet out of my lap and leans forward, “What happened?” Stressed lines on her forehead appear.

I sigh and look down the hallway towards Kai's room. He's been in there for hours. “I need to talk to him,” I say, “Don't worry about it, I'll tell you later.”

 

The lines on her forehead don't go away.

 

“Kagome,” I lean in and take her hands in mine, “I'll take care of it.”

She nods.

Ruri squeals and breaks the short silence.

“Mommy! I cut myself!”

 

“Oh, Ruri! I told you to be careful!” Kagome is out of her chair and fretting over the girl in an instant, “Are you alright? Let me get you a band-aid honey.”

 

Some exaggerated tears and a phone call from Sango later...

 

“We'll see you in a few hours.” Kagome says, putting a little red coat on Ruri and grabbing her bag and keys from the kitchen bench.

 

Ruri is already out the door, “Hurry up, mom! Chihiro said 5:00!” I suppose she forgot about the cut on her finger. I notice the little red band-aid (because it has to match her outfit) as she bends over to tie her own shoelaces.

 

They're going to Miroku's to help decorate for some sort of unnecessary pre-Christmas dinner that Sango, Rin and Kagome insist on doing every year. Honestly, I go for the food, but it isn't always the best when my jackass brother is sitting across from me in a perfect suit, perfectly groomed, perfectly cutting up his perfect food into tiny chewable perfect pieces.

 

Anyway.

 

Just before Kagome leaves, she lowers her voice and gives me that look.

 

“Go talk to Kai.” She tells me, and then secures her scarf around her neck - blue, like her eyes - and leaves, closing the door behind her. And then it's just the me, the silence, and my son down the hall. I can hear my heart beating and I can hear the cars on the street outside.

 

Keh, what happened to my special present?

Stupid wench.

 

Beautiful, amazing, stupid wench.

 

I clean up the bits and pieces of wrapping paper and the unusable scrunched up bits of tape that Ruri stuck to the edge of the table. The scissors go back in the cupboard in the kitchen, some leftover dishes are washed, and everything's `the way I left it, InuYasha!'.

 

All that's left is the horrors that lie in the room just down the hall.

 

Time to be a dad, InuYasha.

 

 

***

 

 

Kai's room.

 

It used to be so innocent. I look at it now; the dark curtains are drawn, there are chords and wires all over the floor around his computer, his stereo, and there's crap busting out from under his bed. I approach it; he's lying down and facing away from me, and if he heard me come in and hasn't told me to piss off yet, I'm supposing I'm in luck. As I reach out to touch his shoulder I remember a time when I used to tuck him into his Dragonball Z covers. He would tell me he loves me.

 

And I'd feel like a good father.

 

“Oi, Kai,” I say gently. Is he sleeping?

 

Or does he hate me?

 

“Kai,” I say a little louder.

 

When he doesn't answer I touch his shoulder and he jumps, startled, yanking that iPod thing out of his ears and sitting up, with a look on his face that says he really doesn't want me around. It hurts;

 

This distance between us.

 

He clutches the music thing in his fist, “What do you want?” He spits out at me, his eyes bloodshot and his nose a little red. The brightness in his eyes is lost to the darkness of his room and the something he has going on inside him. He sniffs and rubs his nose, looking down into his hands with a broken look on his face that makes me realize he hasn't been doing drugs.

 

He's been crying.

 

“Are you ok?” I ask softly, sitting on the bed beside him like I used to all those years ago to tell him stories.

 

He looks away from his hands but not at me, at the little gap in the curtains that's letting the orangey afternoon sunset colour seep into his room. The colour of his eyes. My eyes.

 

My son.

 

“Please,” I implore, touching his shoulder again. When he doesn't recoil I rub his back, “Tell me what the hell is going on.”

 

“It's stupid,” he mumbles under his breath, still looking at the gap between the curtains.

 

“Kai,” I squeeze his shoulder, “It can't be stupid if it's making you like this.”

 

And then our eyes meet; it's sudden, it throws me off guard. It hits me like two thousand knives. I look into the depressed golden depths and I know exactly what's wrong with him.

 

He has a broken heart.

 

“What happened?” I ask softly. My voice is level, my face calm. Because on the inside I'm screaming. Everything in me is screaming for me to hug the boy, to make it better, to fix it all. He's far too young to have a broken heart.

 

I watch him closely and see him force something down that must have tried to overwhelm him.

 

“There's this girl,” he begins, his voice almost a whisper and his eyes back to the iPod in his hands. “Ai,” he breathes. Her name.

 

I can see it tearing him apart.

 

“Go on,” I urge him. I want to know what this girl did to my son.

 

He takes a deep breath, “Well...” his thumbs start fiddling with each other, “We'd been going out for a few months...mom knew about us...”

 

Eh? Why doesn't anyone tell me these things!?

 

“We were great - she was great,” he says, his voice starting to waver. “I've never felt like this about anyone before,” he tells me, and I know he trusts me. “And we were so happy, y'know? I knew it was more than some crush...” he trailed off, taking a pause and no doubt trying to control his emotions. I can see the corners of his mouth twitching and I know he's trying his hardest not to cry, just like when he was little, and it makes me see that he's still my little boy.

 

“We had sex...” he says carefully.

 

“What!?” When the fuck did my little boy start having sex!?

 

“It was my first time...” he went on, ignoring my outburst. He tries to find the right words to describe the best feeling in the world, “It was...it was...like--”

“I know what it's like.” I cut him off and save him the trouble of looking for them all day.

 

“K-Kagome,” I gasp, her naked body beneath me is nothing short of the best thing I've ever felt. She wraps her arms around me, her eyes welcoming me in; the warmth is something I never want to be rid of. The warmth of lying in Kagome's arms, the look in her blue, blue eyes. The warmth of loving her more than anything else in the world and knowing she feels the same.

 

I'm going to marry this girl.

 

“Oh, god,” she whispers in my ear as I start to enter her for the first time. “I love you so much,” she tells me, her breathing deep and long, her hands shaking as they clutch at my back. I know she's in pain as I push further in, and I know I really should care more about what she's feeling than about what I'm feeling, but -- but...

 

It just feels so fucking good.

 

Her wet, wet heat tightens around my cock and the breath whooshes right from my lungs. Before this very instant, I told myself it couldn't possibly be that hard to stay in control of myself, I wouldn't possibly lose it because I love Kagome so much that nothing will stop me from holding out for her and concentrating on her needs. That was my plan. Make it to twenty.I kept telling myself that. Make it to twenty. Make it to twenty, InuYasha.

 

Until Kagome was underneath me, until I witnessed first-hand what it was really like to be inside her, to have her looking at me with pain in her eyes overrun by passion and love and awe for me than no-one else has ever had. Until she clutched at my back as I took her virginity, until she whispered in my ear that she loves me, the hot breath like a caress to my skin. And she looks so fucking gorgeous it's not even fair.

 

Make it to five, InuYasha, make it to five.

 

The first time I thrust into her my entire body enters heaven, she whimpers against my shoulder and bites down a little on my skin. “Holy shit, Kagome,” I gasp when her muscles tighten around me. My eyes screw themselves shut and my arms are trembling to hold up my weight above her, the most beautiful, amazing girl in the world. I force my eyes open when I hear her small cry, and worry soon replaces the bliss that isnumbing me to everythingelse that exists. “Are you ok?”

She swallows and nods at me, a small smile that's probably forced, “Keep going,” she tells me.

I feel bad for hurting her, it's the last thing I want to do, but we both knew it would hurt her, and she told me...well, she told me that...

“I want to give this gift to you.”

The second thrust is an accident, involuntary. But then Kagome's hands come around my neck and she pulls me in for a kiss. Her lips taste so good, and the heat between us is dizzying as her tongue plays with mine. I thrust into her a third time, my hips moving with a mind of their own, and she cries out in surprise, breaking the kiss.

“Wait,” she tells me, and I think I'm going to die, “Tell me you love me,” she says, “Say my name and tell me you love me.”

Oh god, Kagome, you have no idea.

“I love you, Kagome,” I tell her, my voice rough with emotion as little bullets of pleasure ricochet up and down my spine, “I love you so fucking much.”

 

She smiles just before I claim her lips and my hips jerk forward on their own again.

 

Fuck.

 

Little spasms start happening and I know I've got to keep going. I pull back slowly, and thrust into her with a long, deliberate stroke that makes her whimper and makes me explode inside her precious body. My hips jerk, my hands clench up,my toes curl, I cry out her name and I collapse onto the girl I love more than anything else in the world.

 

Nice. I made it to five.

 

I can't control my breathing, I can't control my trembling, I can't control the overwhelming need to kiss her and hold her and never, ever, ever let go.

She says, “I love you, InuYasha.”

 

I say, “Marry me.”

 

“Kai! I don't believe this! Did you use protection!?”

“Please don't do this, dad...” He covers his face with a hand in shame.

 

I sigh. He's right. It must be hard enough for him to talk about this already. There's a silence between us and I hear him take a deep breath.

 

“She left and didn't call me that night,” he says, “Or the next day...” I see moisture begin to coat his eyes and he squeezes them shut, “In a single week, I've never felt so vulnerable before in my life,” he breathes out.

 

I smile softly, “I know how you feel,” I say, my hand on his shoulder. I know exactly how he feels. That weakness, that exposure after opening your heart utterly and completely to someone else. It's like...

 

Giving them the power to destroy you, but trusting that they won't.

 

“She called me the other night. After a whole week.” He continues, “She told me she doesn't want me anymore.” He chokes and the tears, the bottled up emotion, explode from his eyes and the distance between us closes as he hugs me. “She told me she found someone else,” he says, muffling it into my shoulder.

 

My son is hugging me...

 

My arms come up around his shaking body and he cries into my shoulder, clutching for life onto my shirt.

 

“That night,” he said, his voice quiet and broken, “She told me she loved me.” I can feel him trembling, jerking with sobs and I realize suddenly. I don't know how he feels. I never will. I gave Kagome the power to end me, to shatter my heart into tiny, little, invisible pieces. But she didn't.

 

She said `yes' and she became my wife.

 

I blame her for that now, for making me the happiest man alive and filling my life with brightness and joy. I blame her for making everything amazing, for giving me beautiful children and wonderful friends. I could hate her for all of it. For truly loving me and giving me a place to call home. Because of her, I don't know the pain my son is going through right now. Because of her, no matter how much I say I do, I really don't understand what he's feeling, and there's nothing I can do to make it better.

 

So I start crying too.

 

“You're fucking pathetic,” he says against my shoulder, his voice hoarse and broken, “I bet you haven't even wrapped mom's present yet.”

 

We laugh through our tears together.

 

 

***

 

 

“Ahh, I'm stuffed,” I say, rubbing my inflated stomach. I lie on my side of the bed, propped up with a few pillows while I wait for Kagome to come to bed. I can see her in the bathroom, washing off her make-up and taking off those earrings with the gold bells and red bows - they're tacky but they're cute - that she always wears to Christmas parties. Not that it was really a party... “Damn you can cook,” I tell her, trying to get her attention.

 

She turns away from the mirror and smiles, her face fresh and her hair loose. Relaxed. Happy. Just the way I like her.

 

She flicks off the light switch and climbs over me to get to her side of the bed - she's even sexy in long baggy pajamas - and I catch her scent. That incredible buttery coconut smell from that moisturizer she uses on special occasions. I close my eyes and take a deep breath as she settles herself beneath the covers by my side and I try not to whine.

“Aren't you going to sleep?” She asks, tugging lightly at the extra pillows I have behind my back.

 

I pull them out from behind me until there's only one and I lie down, wrapping my arms around her little waist and pulling her flannelette covered body flush against mine. I bury my nose in the crook of her neck, nuzzling aside the collar of her pajamas, and I can smell that incredible smell of Kagome and coconut and soap and I groan.

My voice is muffled against her skin, “I don't want to sleep.”

 

I can hear the smile in her voice and I can feel her hands drawing things on my back, “But tomorrow's Christmas Eve, Inu,” she says, pulling back so she can see my face, “We have to wake up early,” she brushes my hair out of the way and kisses my forehead. Her hand is so soft...her lips are so soft...

 

I pull her close and bury my face again and I grumble.

 

“You said you got me a special present,” I complain against her delicious skin. Her smell is driving me crazy.

She laughs, “You know you can't open your presents before Christmas.” I frown.

 

And then I roll her on her back, pin her down and spread her amazing legs so that my stiff cock is snuggled comfortably in that warm place in between them.

 

“I think I can.”

 

I smirk because I know she loves it.

 

I see that darkness settle in her eyes, I see the way her lips part a little, the way they do when she can't think of what to say. I lean in and kiss her to save her the trouble of trying to come up with some witty come-back and I press my hips into hers to let her know precisely what I want. Her breath catches in her chest and my hand comes up to flick open the top buttons of her shirt while she's distracted with my tongue in her mouth. She gasps when I break the kiss and moans when I suck on her neck. I feel one of her hands sneak from my back down to my crotch and she rubs the bulge in my pants.

 

Fuck, she's so good at that.

 

Just the right pressure, just the right pace...I renew my efforts on her neck and lick up and down the slender column, sucking her skin in all the sensitive places that took me years to find. My hips jerk towards her hand and my body heat is skyrocketing in my thick winter pajamas.

“Oh god, Kagome,” I grunt into her skin, “don't you fucking stop.”

 

Yes...

 

And then she stops.

 

...

“W-wait,” she says, and I stop sucking. I kiss the red mark I left while I wait for her to continue, “You didn't tell me what happened with Kai!” She pulls her hand away from my crotch and props herself up on her elbows with that worried expression on her face.

 

I just stare at her. My eye twitches.

 

“Wench...”

“InuYasha! Did you talk to him?”

I close my eyes and I try to calm my racing heart.

“Yeah,” I say.

“Well? Tell me.”

I pinch the bridge of my nose, “Look, woman, I'm trying to ravish you right now. Can we talk about Kai tomorrow?”

The absolute fury in her eyes has my dick scared soft in two seconds.

“Ok, ok!” I sigh, “He had some girl trouble.” I say. I remember my conversation with Kai and I try to figure out how much I should tell her.

 

Her eyes go from aggravated to worried again. “What happened?”

“Some stupid bitch dumped him,” She doesn't say anything, so I go on, “and he was in love with her.”

Her eyes brighten with moisture, “Is he ok?”

 

He cried for threehours.

 

“He'll get over it.”

She frowns and says quietly, “How could you be so callous towards your son?” She pushes me gently off her and sits up, “He has feelings too you know. You can't wave them off and act like they don't matter!”

I smile, and I don't know why, “He's stronger than you think, Kagome.”

“But he's still just a kid!”

I stare at her for a moment, her hair one big tumbling mess of silky brown around her face and shoulders, and her eyes that gorgeous emotional blue colour that takes my breath away.

“You're so beautiful,” I tell her, because I just can't keep it in.

 

She goes silent and I reach out to touch her hand, resting on the bed. “I should go talk to him,” she says, a light blush dusting her cheeks.

I run my thumb over her soft skin, “No, you should stay here with me and give him his space.”

 

Her hand starts to play with mine, “How do you know he'll be ok?”

 

Our fingers lace together.

 

“I just know.”

 

She sighs in the quiet and lies down, snuggling into my chest and pulling the covers over us. “I trust you,” she tells me in the darkness “and I love you.” She falls asleep eventually, and I lie awake holding her like I have so many times before, staring at the closed curtains that shield us from the bright street light just outside.

 

Kagome,I'm a good husband, right?

I rest my chin on her head and I think about the years of my life I've spent lying with Kagome in my arms, and how they shine so brightly next to the years I spent without her. I think about how many years I've had a family, about Kai, who says the glass is half empty, and about my beautiful Ruri, who says it's half full. I think of the time when I wouldn't have even imagined something as wonderful as a family could happen to me one day.

Am I a good father?

 

 

***

 

 

“Merry Christmas! Come in, come in!” Kagome greets cheerily.

 

Rin's smile is huge, “Kagome! Merry Christmas!” She blows a puff of air upwards to get the white fluffy stuff from her Christmas hat out of her eyes.

 

I can't help but smile too as Rin and Sesshoumaru come through the doorway and take off their coats while Miroku's girls go to help in the kitchen. Everyone's running around to get the feast ready. The best thing about Christmas. I can smell the turkey. But damn, it's not ready yet. There are at least five women in there, what the hell is the hold up?

 

The food is taking too long.

 

My brother joins us in the living room, his chin all high and his eyes all squinty when he looks at Kouga sitting next to me. They share those acknowledging nods and Sesshoumaru manages to sit down - even with that giant stick up his ass. Miroku breaks the silence.

 

“So, how about this weather?”

 

And he gets three death stares for the lame attempt at conversation.

 

“Guh, well you try think of something we all have in common!” He crosses his arms over his chest and slumps back into the couch.

 

I turn to my brother, “Did you watch the final last night?” I smile because my team won and because his team was playing them.

 

“A fluke.” He says in that calm and collected way.

 

I open my mouth to argue but Kai walks through the front door, his arms full with presents, his face full with a smile and his eyes full with sadness. The youngest ones - Ruri and Kouga's kid, Sakura, sprint towards him and the presents are gone in three seconds flat. They run to place them on top of the growing pile under our tree, so they can open them all after lunch, because `anyone you doesn't eat, doesn't get to open their presents, ok!?' Kai sinks into the couch beside Miroku and opens himself a bottle of beer.

 

“Merry Christmas, Kai!” Miroku says cheerily. “Thanks for bringing the presents over from our house; I can't believe I forgot them!”

 

“Yay! Auntie Sango's here!” Ruri jumps into her favourite `aunts' armsas Mirolu and his woman walk through the doorway.They're always the first ones here on Christmas day. Their girls strut in, all of them tall and beautiful and very much aware of their good looks.

 

“Wow, I love your dress!” Sango smiles, “And guess who got you a Christmas gift?”

 

Ruri's face lights up like nothing else.

“Miroku!” Sango calls to her husband, who already found a seat in front of the T.V. with me. “Where are the kids' presents?I want to give Ruri's to her now.”

 

Miroku's face falls flat and Sango releases Ruri, walking calmly over to her beloved.

 

He screws his eyes shut, “I forgot them at home,” he says, his shoulders rising as he braces himself for a lashing.When nothing comes, he opens one eye as much as he dares to and meets Sango's furious face. “I'll go back and get them!” He tells her in a hurry, searching his pockets for car keys.

 

Kai appears from the hallway, “It's cool Miro, I'll go for you.”

 

“Everyone! Lunch is ready!” Kagome calls from the dining table as she sets down the glazed ham.

 

The guys are in their seats in the blink of an eye and I see Kai's eyes light up for the first time in weeks. All of us - I've lost count of how many now - sit at the long, long table covered in the most fantastic Christmas feast you'll ever see. Ruri sits between her idols, Ayumi and Chihiro, looking all Christmas-ey and cute in a red and white dress. I sit at the head of the table, and Sesshoumaru directly opposite me on the other side. Just like every year. In between, our families, our friends, our pack.

 

I look over at Sango scolding Miroku for grabbing at food with his hands, at Rin, who is in a happy conversation with Ayame about how to honey glaze a ham and get all the cloves in the right place. I see Kouga, feeding his young boy bits of turkey with gravy, and Miroku's youngest, Yuki, staring in awe at the food. I look over at Kai and I watch him for a while, and I wonder how he must be feeling so miserable but forcing himself to be happy, at least just for today. He pokes around his salad with a fork, pushing away all the cherry tomatoes that he hates and I see him take a deep breath.

 

“Merry Christmas, everyone!” Ruri says, with gravy all over her face, getting grubby fingerprints on her glass of lemonade.

 

Kai smiles, a real smile, and he lifts his cup.

 

“Merry Christmas.”

 

Everyone follows suit, and I appreciate the crystal wine glass in my hand as I hold it up and it catches the light.

 

“Cheers!” we all say.

 

I take a sip of my favourite Merlot and I catch Kagome looking at me from a few seats down. Our eyes lock over the rim of my glass and I lower it back to the table as everyone continues to eat. She doesn't say anything to me; she just looks at me with all that love in her eyes that I'll be working for the rest of my life to deserve. She looks so beautiful, her eyes bright and her cheeks a little pink from the warmth and the food and the happiness.

 

Look at us, Kagome, I tell her with my eyes.

 

Look how happy we ended up.

 

And it's all thanks to her. This woman that's so caring and selfless and passionate and loving. This woman that dragged me from hell to heaven, who completed my life and who continues to make it exciting and well worth living. Kagome. Her name. It so easily comes from my lips, it tastes so sweet. It so easily betrays any emotions welling inside. With her name, I can say everything and anything, all at once. Whether I like it or not.

 

Because she does something to me, something terrifying and wonderful that I don't ever want to be rid of; and I love her so much for it.

 

I'm fully aware of everyone around me, their happy faces and the incredible food. But my eyes are stuck now, by that same spell she cast on me the moment we first met. And I can't stop looking at her.

 

Kagome. This woman who gave me children and family.

 

This woman I call my wife.

 

 

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The End
© axel720

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A/N: Guys! Hope you had a wonderful Christmas day. I had planned to have this done by Christmas Eve but things just got so hectic ><
Well, I think that's it for now and I set up this chapter so that there was no room for me to add to the story any more after this. Sorry to say, but I'm just going to get way too busy and I have other things in my life more important, plus, I think that's enough, and I love this little series the way it is, and 5 is just a great number to leave it at =p Thank you to everyone who has reviewed - 120+ (collectively) so far! It really encouraged me to write more, and I'm just glad people liked this so much. And as for Pistol-Whipped, I will finish it! XD Hopefully before school starts up again - but I don't wanna force it out, so we'll see.

Happy holidays everyone!
~Ax.