InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Throw Caution To The Wind ❯ The Bumpy Skin of Love ( Chapter 11 )

AN: Thank you for all of your reviews! Now, to answer even more questions: No, Kagome and Sesshoumaru are not married. Kagome puts pieces of conversations together from before she lost her memory and what the servants were saying afterwards and comes to this conclusion. Maki tells Sesshoumaru not to tell her she is wrong, it may cause damage. Secondly, I don't know how far the Kag/Sess relationship will go. You'll just have to find out, hopefully you aren't disappointed.

Also, Sesshoumaru may do some things that are a bit OOC. Sorry, please just go along with it…please review!

This chapter is dedicated to J.R. who I wish I could have know better.

THROW CAUTION TO THE WIND_CHAPTER 11_THE BUMPY SKIN OF LOVE

Imagine if you forgot everything, erased every major memory from your mind. Wouldn't you feel somewhat…vulnerable? You would just have to trust everything anyone told you and make guesses without any base of knowledge. It made me feel helpless, like I couldn't do anything for myself. And then pieces began to come back in broken fragments, to haunt me when I would have thought they would help and relieve me. Along with the memories came an stable feeling that perhaps I did belong on this earth, but there also came unsettling feelings. Not miserable, just unsettling, and I didn't know why. Like the flashes of memory, flashes of feelings were suddenly making their presence know in a burst of emotion that would sustain or cripple me for a moment before passing. I don't know what the significance was. Perhaps I was remembering past emotions. Perhaps I just had a bad case of PMS. Either way, it didn't really matter. Not to anybody, not to me.

Rin had come out, perhaps searching for a play mate, but had apparently held back on that idea when she saw me laying there in the garden. I probably looked scary or sad. Either way, she abandoned any thoughts of play she might have had and instead merely handed me a rolled up sheaf of parchment, told me that it was a present for me, smiled, and left. Sometimes it amazes me when I think of how perceptive she was for her age.

It took a moment for her visit to even sink in. I left the parchment tied up, resting on the damp earth besides me, to open later.

I lay there, gazing at the rose with its backdrop of the night sky. The days were shorter now. It seemed as if I had just come out, only to be greeted by the depth of stars and inky black. Or maybe I had just been laying there for too long. Needless to say, I was getting a bit cold, but hadn't really noticed it. I hadn't even noticed he was there until there was a rustling of fabric and the presence of another body, standing next to where I lay.

"It was a gift to my mother from a traveling friend of the family's. It's from the continent. She planted it there, and it has remained there since then. I am inclined to believe that it is the only one in these parts." He was speaking about the rose. Somehow, his words struck a cord.

"You've told me this before, haven't you?" I remained staring at the flower and the sky. It was funny how if I focused on the flower, the sky became blurred and if I directed my attention to the sky, the flower became merely a shape blocking out a section of the heavens. It's funny how we can only concentrate on one thing without something else lacking. I tried switching between the two.

"Yes." His replies were always so short and curt. Yet, I envied him. To make your point so directly that everyone understands in the least amount of words possible. I was tired of the way everyone else dressed things up. Even though it was usually nicer or more polite, it was wasted effort to make something more than it is.

"Why did you tell me again?" The top three leaves and petals shifted slightly in a breeze, creating flowing shadows on their surfaces.

"Because you want to remember."

Suddenly I felt my interest in the rose wane, and I turned my attention instead to a nearby plant only to realize that it was part of the rose bush as well. I had been too intent on the one blossom that I had not realized the rest around it. There was a bloom on another branch of the bush, surrounded by thorns, yet still growing beautifully. I rose to a sitting position slowly, still fixing my gaze on the bush, yet searching it now, for more signs of new life.

"Sit down?" I moved over slightly, making space for him. I hadn't expected him to actually sit next to me. More like make some degrading comment on how dirty I was, then leave in all his high glory. Instead, he removed his swords and took the place next to me. We sat for a while like that, just the two of us. And, amazingly, it was comfortable. I wasn't bothered by the silence. It was warm and wrapped around us soothingly. Yet, I wanted to know about him.

"She must have been beautiful." It's ironic how I wanted to know about him, when hours before, I didn't want him to know anything about me. I still didn't, really. But he was different. I guess even I can be a hypocrite…

"They said she was the most beautiful lady in the lands." I wondered if I dare ask, why he had relayed what others said. I knew the answer, but I wanted to hear.

"Do you think she was beautiful?" I glanced at him, taking in his profile for a mere second. He was beautiful.

"I can not say. She died when I was young. I do not remember her."

I hadn't expected that. So he couldn't remember either?

"I'm sorry. I know she must have been beautiful." He glanced at me questioningly when I said this, but did not comment. Why had he told me this? Was he this open with me before my accident? I couldn't help but think that he had not been.

"But you know…there's something we have in common. I remember about my family. I lost my father when I was young also. I can't remember him, but I know he must have been a wonderful man. I can feel it. I guess all things leave behind some lasting impression. Maybe it's not the memories that are important, but how you want to remember them."

I sighed, then moved to get up and turned to him. I looked at him intently, wonderingly, letting my gaze linger, then dropped it. He, as if understanding, nodded once. I rose, took one last look at the sky, and left to find my room and the sleep that called to me from within it.

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The night before, we had met an understanding. We had excepted each other's presences and perhaps found something we held in common. I didn't dwell on the fact, but took a minor comfort in it as I went to my task of educating Rin in lessons and swimming. I have to admit, I enjoyed the time spent with her as I only allowed myself to focus on her and the lesson at hand. It worked like a charm to get things off my mind.

Out of nature, I had begun to help Maki, Kaji, and whoever would let me, with daily chores such as cooking, cleaning, and the laundry. Whatever to occupy me. I found that these daily tasks brought back memories more easily. While cooking lunch with Fumie one day, I got a sudden vision of myself settled over a pot that was heating on a campfire, a container that read Cup-Man in one of my hands. I had decided that it must have been food I had eaten before living with Sesshoumaru. I doubted I would be squatting over a campfire, as the lady of the Saigoku. Yet, the memory brought a fond warmth, like it was something that I did daily and it brought me calmness and the base happiness of something familiar. These memories etched themselves in my mind, as if I were determined not to lose them again, which I was. Even if I wasn't sure I'd like what I'd find.

Maki and Kaji had pronounced me fully recovered, putting aside the minor amnesia detail. I was back to normal health according to them and I found myself willing to agree, seeing as how I felt ten times stronger than I had when I first came to in this blank new life. Although, I had been feeling better for a few days now, but Maki and Kaji would hear none of it until they were positive I had recovered. In their terms. I was relieved, to say the least, that I felt more…sturdy and I believe the servants were also, since they no longer had to wait on me hand and foot. It was nice to be able to dress myself, you know?

Since our conversation in the garden, I hadn't seen Sesshoumaru except for breakfast one morning and he was leaving just as I came in. I greeted him as warmly as I could. After all, I should get to know the guy…again. He had nodded curtly then continued on. I made a mental note to get up earlier. There was no escaping me. He could run, but he couldn't hide. I was the huntress and he the prey. Bwa-hahahahahah! Ahem. Sorry.

Anyways, lessons with Rin were positively draining. And rewarding. I found that the happiest flashes of memory came when I was around her. Sitting there, watching her chew her lip as she practiced the correct strokes for the particular symbol I was teaching her, I wondered what exactly her relation was to Sesshoumaru and myself. She obviously did not have the attitude of Sesshoumaru, but certain things aren't passed down by genes. And she certainly didn't look like him. And she most certainly was not a full demon. She called me Kagome-nechan but a part of me couldn't help quell the nervous voice that commented on how much we looked alike. Perhaps Rin really was my little sister and Sesshoumaru took her in with the marriage to me, as part of the deal. Maybe he adopted her. No, that was insane. He wouldn't. Simply not in his character. And then there was that other possibility. That possibility. I had heard of ladies of stature not wishing the amount of children they had to be known, considering the young age of most of the ladies of court. Was it possible that Rin was my…oh no. Ooooh no.

I busied myself with reading a scroll that was conveniently within reach.

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Nothing is sure in life. Everything is a variable that may morph on whim into something completely contradictory. Nothing is secure, nothing is sure. Except for my love of hot springs, that is. It seemed that the devotion to my hydrogen and oxygen molecules would and will never waver.

So what if Rin was tiring, Sesshoumaru was incapable of emotions, and Jaken….was Jaken? I'd get used to it. Well, I had better get used to it. And I had the hot springs!

Somehow, Rin had managed to manipulate our afternoon situation so that we were out playing in a meadow near the castle instead of practicing her reading lessons. And, Sesshoumaru was there too. There were a few things wrong with this situation. 1.) I was playing with Rin as opposed to teaching her. 2.) Sesshoumaru had actually come with us….and Jaken. 3.) Sesshoumaru was not opposed to me playing with Rin as opposed to teaching her. Was that confusing? 4.) Sesshoumaru was there. I hardly ever saw him, especially during the afternoons. He seemed to be taking a break. That was reason number five.

"Jaaaa--keeen!!!" Flowers. Rin. Jaken. Rin chasing Jaken. Jaken running from Rin and flowers for dear life. Or pride. Wait, what pride? Jaken, pride? Hah.

Personally, I was relieved. She had just about exhausted my energy storage. Now she had the amphibian to chase after and hopefully to entertain her for, oh, the next twenty years. I plopped down in the long grass next to a rock that Sesshoumaru was currently sitting on, not caring about my beautiful kimono, not caring that my hair fell lose as I hit the grass. I seemed to be doing that a lot lately. Whatever. Sesshoumaru had been watching Rin dully, an odd look on his face. One that I noticed he only dawned when around Rin. It was almost curious, maybe even caring. Maybe.

I decided that this would be the best time to ask him some questions, considering Jaken was currently getting a daisy weave. I sat up quickly, snagging my kimono on a rock. I let a few words spill that I knew I had not taught myself.

"I was not aware that ladies of court knew such words." There was a hint of amusement in his voice that, oddly, suited him, yet enraged me quite successfully.

"I can only imagine that I was influenced by those that surround me." Not that I really believed he would ever say such words. In fact, I couldn't recall ever having heard them before, but, as we know, that's not saying much…

He did not say anything for quite some time, then-

"Are you implying that I taught you such vulgarities?"

I folded my knees up and wrapped my arms around them, watching Rin happily as she proceeded to accessorize Jaken's clothing with some tiny blossoms. Well, they were rather plain clothes, after all. All that brown and green really did make him look like a big--yeah. That's very unlady-like. Not that I care what's lady-like, but even I have my lines to draw.

"Me? Implying that? Why would I imply such a thing? You haven't given me any reason to think that you would do something like that….that I can remember…" I smiled happily up at him. I realized then that I actually had a little bit of fun with out verbal combats. Especially when I won. Small victories, but victories nonetheless.

We sat in silence for a while, watching Rin and Jaken's humorous actions, well, Rin's humorous actions to Jaken. Despite all his bad assets, the toad-thing provided some good humor. Like a comic relief in some manga or movie.

"Sesshoumaru…?" Rin had now stolen Jaken's staff of heads and was running around happily, Jaken chasing after her, cursing children. Sesshoumaru didn't say anything, but I took that as a "go on". It's not like I wouldn't have anyways. "Rin…how is she related?"

I thought I saw him sigh, but it might just have been my own breathing.

"Rin was orphaned. I found her and took her on as my ward."

I was shocked, to say the least. "Really? That's so…sweet! No, that's great!"

Sesshoumaru quirked an eyebrow and looked at me as if I were mad.

"Sweet?"

"……sorry." I couldn't help but laugh, though. The look he gave me was actually, yes, amusing. This only made him give me an even more perplexed expression. I continued laughing, almost rolling on the ground. He turned to watch Rin again.

"Whew…sorry, it's just that…I'm relieved." I moved a strand of hair that had been misplaced, out of my face.

"And why would that relieve you?"

"Well, Rin looks so much like me that….I thought that….maybe.."

"I see. No. Rin is not related to you in any way that is evident."

"Well, that's a relief right there! I mean, who would want to have a child at an age like mine?"

"Most nobles would have three or more children by now."

I think I almost choked to death. That's right. People married so much younger in older times…but, then why…"

"Sesshoumaru, can I ask you something?" He didn't say anything, but turned to look at me. I felt like I would turn to stone under that gaze. No, like ice, frozen but able to melt back when the time came. He was like medusa. A hot, male, medusa. "Well, have we ever…..did we ever…you know….have we…"

"Speak your mind, woman."

"It's Kagome. Not woman. I'm Kagome, your wife, remember?" I pointed at him accusingly. Suddenly something seemed out of whack. But then I knew what it was. Rin was no longer chattering on to Jaken. She was making a bee-line for me. She tackled me with an amazing force, hugged me a thousand times, then ran off again, proclaiming "Kagome-nechan is Sesshoumaru's wife! RIN HAS A MOMMY! KAGOME-OKASAN!" She disappeared in the grass, presumably dragging Jaken along with her as if she had never been right in front of us.

"O…k…" I sat, still getting over my shock.

"No…" Sesshoumaru stated. I turned to look at him, still slightly disoriented.

"Wha-"

"We have not." he turned away, his eyes seeing more than mine could of the grass in which Rin had dived. But it didn't look like he was seeing the grass.

"Oh. So that's how it is?"

"How what is?"

"Our marriage. It's one of those." I quirked my eyebrow, feeling slightly disgruntled.

"Stop your ridiculous jabbering. It is not one of those marriages." It looked as if he were battling with himself over something, finally reaching a conclusion two minutes later. It was if he were going to make a comeback, but had thrown it aside at the last moment. "You had a…"condition". It was not a good idea at the time. Then you were attacked by Naraku's detachment and rehabilitating. You know the rest from there."

I gawked at him.

"…..c-condition…?"

"Did you not hear me correctly the first time?" He looked at me and I could swear on my life that he was wearing the most serious about-to-laugh expression ever shown to the world. I paled.

"C-condition?"

"Condition." He nodded solemnly. I felt faint.

"I see. That's the reason for the separate rooms…" Sesshoumaru said nothing, instead gazing on as a wind shifted the nearby forest trees. He looks like a god with his silver hair blowing softly about him like that. I couldn't help but think that I was a very lucky girl for a second. Or a very unlucky one.

"I'm sorry, I have to go. I promised Wakiko I would help her with the laundry." I murmured as I stood up, very well flustered. I called a "see you soon" to Rin and started for the castle, only to halt when he called after me.

"Does it bother you, Kagome?" I didn't turn around, afraid I would burn him with the redness of my cheeks. I couldn't help but imagine how good my impression of the Kool-aid man must have been.

"I doesn't matter to me. It's your castle." I mumbled hurriedly and ran off, blushing even more profusely.

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Ok. So I lied about the whole helping Wakiko thing. In fact, she had insisted that I not help her until I was completely rested, which I was, but she would hear none of it. It was wrong, I know, but what Sesshoumaru didn't know didn't hurt him. I ran straight to my room.

After all, as much as I wasn't too keen on the whole being married young thing, I ought to be the best wife I could.

I stood, staring at myself in the mirror, wondering what on earth could possibly be wrong with me. There were no obvious physical problems. I had gone over my whole body, looking for anything, but the only evident inconsistencies was the cracked rib, which was healing steadily. What on earth could be wrong? I had checked everything. I stood, nude, in front of the mirror, positively perplexed. There just wasn't anything wrong…unless….eep. He didn't mean that type of condition, did he? I swallowed weakly, staring at my reflection which had turned ghostly white. Well, I had to know. Maybe it was something that I could actually see or find and possibly fix. Ughh. This was sooo not cool. I gulped and looked down at my body. Oh hell. It was my body, nobody would know if I tried to figure out exactly what was wrong… I gazed downward, gathered my courage…and couldn't do it. Maybe it was something I missed earlier. Like a broken rotator cuff or something. Yeah, a cracked shoulder…

I was just going over my body for the third time, feeling for bruises, fractures, lumps, anything. I passed over my face, neck, and shoulders, working my way down once more. I winced. Maybe it was breast cancer that made it so I couldn't do certain activities or something. Ok, naïveté, or maybe just denial, but still…I checked them out.

"Human, you are not where you should be now. Sesshoumaru-sama ca--" Jaken stopped mid way into my room, gawking at me, horrified. I stood, frozen, my hands in a very inconvenient place at the time. He stared at me, shocked, I looked at him, petrified. Jaken's face turned dark red, contrasting with his green skin, giving him the appearance of a Christmas ornament. The staff in his hand shot fire off to the side.

"AAAAHHHHHH!!!!" I screamed at the top of my lungs.

"ACCKKK!!!" he screeched as I lunged toward him. I swung my leg and hard foot collided with lumpy head. He went soaring out of the room, slamming into the hallway wall opposite of my door.

"HENTAI TOAD!!!!!" I screamed at him, slamming my door shut without looking twice at the green pile on the floor.

I slumped against the door, panting hard, trying to get a hold of myself. What was that?! What the hell was that?!!!

After a few moments, I collected the pieces of my brain, and the tiny slivers of my pride that might have still remained. That was embarrassing, that's what that was. Completely, utterly…embarrassing and wrong. I sighed heavily and dressed myself, feeling that perhaps I could do without the married life, or the company that came with it, but feeling altogether better than I had three minutes earlier. After all, it's best not to dwell on these things. I would just hunt Jaken down and threaten to pop his overly bulbous eyes if he so much muttered a word about that incident. Yeah. I could get over this. Maybe. After all, I had gotten to kick Jaken into a wall and watch him slide down… I just had one question.

"Why me?"

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"Because Jaken is such a….fine…specimen of….er…yeah?…youkai. He is very -did I mention the castle is great?-also faithful-almost to a fault-and very…green. "

Her eyes lit up like glow in the dark tennis balls, yet the light only lasted a second. Yep, that was the only way to describe them.

Her. I had never thought that it was perhaps even possible, never even dared to enter my mind, that there may be another creature like Jaken. And a female one at that. I had just figured that something that stupid could only be male.

"And why should I be concerned as to who this… 'Jaken' is?" Oo. Even a girl(?) with..umm…physical attributes such as hers could play hard to get. Way to go!

I had been bathing in the hot spring and was heading back towards the castle, through the woods, when I had sensed a small youkai and run into the girl toad youkai (?) traveling to the north. I know it's wrong, but immediately, after my initial astonishment, that is, I thought 'Jaken-be-gone!!'.

"Well, you know, he's kind of lost on his own; he could use a friend. Someone who might understand him better. And, I hope this is not presumptuous of me (big word, way to go Kagome) but he's…the same type of youkai as you, and to tell you the truth, I've never seen another besides Jaken until you came along. I just thought that you two might hit it off, seeing as how he doesn't relate to others too well. Don't get me wrong, he's not mean or anything, he's just…short-sighted sometimes and just short in general because of mistreatment let's leave out the kicking him into the hallway wall, shall we?. Since you're traveling, I could hire you for a few days to work as a servant. You could leave whenever you wanted to. And I'd pay you for the work you did. Travelers can always use money, right?"

"And you think since we are the same type of youkai, that we'll just hit it off, do you?"

"Well…yeah." I smiled uneasily. Don't get me wrong, I didn't want to send Jaken away or get rid of him, I just wanted to get him off my back. He had taken to trailing me around. At first I thought it was because of the show he caught the previous day in my room, and I had delivered repeated kicks to the head every time I saw him, but then I caught on and figured that he had been told to follow me around. I had only barely escaped him to take a bath in peace.

But, at the moment, it didn't seem my 'hook Jaken up' idea was working.

She eyed me warily, and here's a piece of advice, you don't ever want a toad youkai eyeing you. It gives you the creeps, they're so big. The eyes, I mean. She seamed to be measuring me and I smiled as friendly as possible. I thought she was going to scoff and leave any second.

"I may leave whenever I chose?"

I nodded too enthusiastically.

"Very well then."

I think I jumped three feet in the air. I grasped her hand, shaking it madly.

"This is awesome!" She looked at me as if I were positively insane.

"Great…this is great!" I beamed. She nodded in comprehension and I set off, leading her to the castle, and inevitably to the pint-size P.A. known as Jaken.

Operation 'Hook Up Jaken' in progress!!!

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I had successfully kept Kero, as I found out the female toad youkai's name was, away from the eyes of Rin. With the abuse she laid on Jaken, Kero would leave with a jump if Rin got hold of her. So, she served as a new maid for me. She would lay out my clothes, make my bed, and help Fumie and Wakiko with minor chores.

Despite her hard exterior, she got along almost immediately with the other servants, who all shared the pride of a hard job well done. She was a hard worker, proud of her work, and made sure even the smallest things were done perfectly. I couldn't help but wonder if she had been in a similar job before. She had looked slightly worn, but I assumed it had been from traveling. Maybe she needed this job more than I had initially thought. So, so far, in the previous two days, Operation HUJ, as I started to call it, was rolling in perfect motion. The only problem, Kero hadn't even seen Jaken yet. Silently, I wondered if the whole thing would fall to pieces when she saw him. But I reassured myself that he wasn't….that bad…unless he opened his mouth. But, I hadn't had too much time to dwell on the subject, because their meeting came and it was unplanned and definitely unintentional.

To tell you the truth, I had kind of kept Kero away from Jaken up until this point, thinking it would be better if she got to like the castle and other people first. So, I was a little surprised to hear it when Kero told me she had met the toad of the hour.

She had merely been bringing some water to the castle from a nearby river as a favor to Maki, and had run into Jaken. Quite literally. It seems that they were both engrossed in their duties. They had both almost cursed each other out when realization hit. According to Kero, Jaken had just sat there and blinked wildly like she was a ghost. Kero, having a job to finish, got up and grabbed hold of the buckets. Jaken finally snapped himself out of it enough to stand, but thankfully, had been too speechless to say anything. Kero had waited, but nothing came. He had then muttered something about a job Sesshoumaru was waiting for him to complete and had scurried off.

Kero had seemed a bit doubtful. I thought it was fantastic. The fact that she hadn't run away at the first sight of him, was more than I could hope for. Operation HUJ was progressing wonderfully.

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"But the cat had fallen in love with the mouse, even though he was sup-su-"

"Supposed."

"Supposed to eat her. He could not eat the mouse and let her go free."

"Wonderful job, Rin! Your reading's come along so far already. I'm very proud of you!"

Rin glowed happily and scanned the pages of the book again. I had found the childrens' book in the yellow sack and assumed that I had brought it from my time, seeing as how the only other reading material in the castle was yellowing, cracked rolls of parchment. Rin seemed to prefer the colorful pictures in the books I procured to those weathered papers and I don't blame her at all, though I made a mental note to read some of them sometime when I got a chance.

"Do you think Sesshoumaru-sama would be proud of Rin?" She asked me with a cheerful sincerity that seemed to have a saddening effect on me. All she really wanted to do was make Sesshoumaru proud. Something it seemed that could not be done. He would never give her the excess of emotion and encouragement that she needed. He couldn't. I smiled sadly, wishing he could give her that one thing without losing so much. She needed it so much.

"I don't know, why don't you ask him yourself?" Rin looked at me, confused, so I nodded my head towards the doorway where I had sensed him for the last two minutes. It was odd, how I just knew when he was there. I had started to refer to it as my spider sense. Yes, many things about my life 'in the future' had returned to me. But hardly any about my life in feudal Japan had returned, so I didn't have any explanation for my 'spider sense'.

"Sesshoumaru-sama!!!" Rin flew towards the youkai lord, and screeched to a halt right before him, not giving in to the wish to hug him which I could tell she was having a hard time holding back. "Rin read a whole book to Kagome-okasan! Do you want me to read to you too, Sesshoumaru-sama?" She smiled off as the words fell in a tumble out of her mouth.

Sesshoumaru looked studiously at the child and placed a hand on her head.

"Not now, Rin. I must speak with Kagome." Rin nodded furiously, smiling, and skipped off, calling back a thank you for the lesson. Perhaps she didn't need Sesshoumaru's excess attention. Perhaps a nod was all she needed. I smiled. I called after her and gave her the book 'to read to Sesshoumaru later'. I wasn't going to let him skip out on his promise, even if Rin did not need his constant attention. Rin ran off, presumably to be a hindrance and altogether bother to Jaken or to scout out the newest flower patches. I watched her go and turned to Sesshoumaru, who was gazing at me as if he did not know what to make of what he saw. I found it kind of amusing, really.

"You wanted to talk about something?" He nodded curtly.

"There is a new servant in the citadel." I nodded curtly at his statement.

"I brought her here." I looked at him, hoping that would be the end of the conversation. I hadn't even thought that Sesshoumaru might have objections. Really, I hadn't even thought about it at all.

"She was not approved of by myself."

"You know, your right. She was approved of by me." Just because he was the guy, it didn't mean I would have no say in things.

"I am very precise about who works within the castle. I can not have mere travelers in my home. It is a precaution I must take."

"I understand that, but I assure you she will be no trouble. Just trust me on this, Sesshoumaru. It's something we need."

"We do not need another servant in our castle."

I slapped my head in defeat. For being such a smart guy, he sure was dense.

"Trust, Sesshoumaru, we need trust."

He did not say anything for a while and I figured he was debating what the most painful way to get rid of me would be, but even he can be surprising.

"I've seen Jaken with her often."

I couldn't believe it. I had won. He had changed the topic, he would let her stay. And, if he saw Jaken with Kero, then….

"That's wonderful!" I exclaimed happily. My plan was working.

"I do not know what you are scheming, but do not let it interfere with the goings on of this castle."

"Of course. That's a given. All I plan to do is stir things up a bit. You know, add a little spice." I smiled mischievously at him and he quirked a single eyebrow but nodded once and turned to leave.

"Also, Rin should be taught useful knowledge, not romantic fairy tales. No good will come of them, they are useless in reality." I disagreed with him soooo much there. After all, in the future, demons were considered things of fairy tales and myths, but I really didn't feel like arguing, so I growled and let it slip.

He opened the door soundlessly and stepped out. I ran after him and called out to him in the hallway.

"Sesshoumaru…" he stopped and turned gracefully, his hair catching glimpses of light. Man was he gorgeous…but that's not the point. "You said 'our'."

He looked at me with an expressionless mask that seemed to be molded and fit for every opportune moment.

"I do not know the logic of your outburst."

"You said 'we do not need another servant in our castle."

He looked at me strangely, an air that I could not define.

"That's all. Just wanted to tell you." I walked back to the door, opened it, and slid it shut, leaving Sesshoumaru with a hardened, puzzled expression in the hallway. That was a thing I never thought I would see on Sesshoumaru's face.

I sank down, back against the door, a pleased smile rising on my face. I got up and walked over to the mythic romance novel I had found in the yellow pack and started reading the day before.

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I jerked up, my heart fluttering madly. Dreams about people that I could not make out, but I could tell that I should know. There was a light but firm knocking on the wooden shoji door. At first I thought I had dreamt it also, but the door shivered slightly under impact. I sat up, realizing I must have fallen asleep reading on my bed. I moved the book away and rose tipsily, rubbing my bleary eyes. There was the knock again, more deliberate and quick.

"Hold on, I'm coming! If it's an emergency you should-oh." I had slid the door open and looked out only to see no one. Then I looked down. "Hullo, Jaken." I slurred a little with sleep. "This better be good…" He squawked then stuttered, trying to tell me something.

"I-well-I-and Kero-she-well, I kind of-" he tumbled over his words awkwardly. "I made a-I-"

"Jaken, something happened with Kero, didn't it?" Like I said, I had just woken up. Madame Obvious here.

He nodded, his wide eyes bulging.

"You did something stupid, didn't you?" He nodded, once again, his head down.

"Jaken-" he looked up at me, not knowing what to expect. "Are you asking me for girl help?" He nodded weakly. I cracked up. I laughed the hardest I had in a long time for a good minute, but stopped at the horrified look on his face. "Alright, alright. Don't worry, Jaken. I'll try to help you as much as I can, since I was having a bad dream anyway. But mark my words, next time you wake me up when I'm sleeping, I'll make you wish you were being the frog leg main course at dinner, you understand?" He squeaked a small comprehension and I stepped aside for him to come into my room.

He stood there, in the middle of my floor like a helpless child. I motioned to my bed and he scrambled on top of it and took a seat at the end, looking as if he very much didn't know what to make of it. This enough was a major sacrifice for me.

I climbed in bed, pulling the sheets over me, trying the best I could to stay awake and warm at the same time. He sat there for some good time, staring at his feet which barely skimmed the ground. After a good five minutes, I cleared my throat.

"Tell me exactly what happened." Jaken blinked, the dove head first into his story.

Fifteen minutes later, I sat there, shocked, yet smiling. Jaken looked at me pleadingly for any help I might have to offer.

"Jaken…what color is Kero's outfit?" Jaken looked puzzled, but told me every detail of Kero's daily dress, to the stitch if I remembered correctly. "Jaken, tell me what she looks like." Again, Jaken looked disoriented, but prattled off everything I could have noticed and more, describing her like a priceless piece of art.

I sighed and smiled knowingly. Jaken waited. But I don't think my reply was what he was suspecting.

"Well, you really messed up this time." I smiled happily and Jaken looked horrified. "But…you ramble on like a blithering idiot, know everything about the way Kero looks, and have even memorized her daily work routine. Jaken, there's some good news and some bad news…" I must admit, I was having a ball going on like this, but it was a mean thing to do. "The bad news is that you've hurt her pride a bit, and a woman's pride is something not easily mended." Jaken sighed dejectedly and probably would have left right then if I had let him. "But the good news is that…you are totally in love with her.." Jaken looked horrified, but then seemed to understand. "…and if that's true, you'll find a way to fix this. It may not be easy, but you can do it."

Jaken was silent. He slid off my bed and paced my room. I almost had to laugh, the look of stern concentration on his face was so humorous. Finally, he looked up determinedly.

"Is there anything that could….help?", he croaked. I smiled. Guys were always looking for the easy way out of things. But poor Jaken, he had no experience in this field whatsoever. Well, not that I knew of or could remember. I didn't really want to think about it, but still.

"Well, almost all girls like gifts. And-and poetry! Write her a song or a poem! She'd love that!" I rose out of bed and nudged him along out of my room. "I know you can do it! Just tell her what you feel, go for it, and don't let anything stop you!" with that, I shoved him out of my room, slid the door shut, and fell back asleep.

________________________________________________________________ _______

For the second time, I was woken up by a small movement beside me. Something prodded me in the back.

"Jaken, if you-oh, Rin-chan." I turned over fully to face the small girl who was curled up beside me. "What time is it, Rin-chan?"

"Rin just went to sleep a little while ago…but I woke up." There was a nervous air about her and it frightened me.

"What's wrong, Rin-chan? Did something happen?"

"Rin-I had a bad dream…" she muttered, burying her head in my covers.

"Do you want to tell me about it?" she shook her head 'no' and I let it be.

"Kagome-okasan?"

"Yes, Rin-chan?"

"Can you read me a story?"

"Of course." I stood to get a book, but she pulled one out from behind her. Well prepared, I guess. It was the one about the cat and mouse. I could tell it was one of her favorites. So, I read to her. Twice and a half times, in fact. Half way through the third time, she was sleeping soundly. I thought about letting her sleep in my bed, but thought the better of it, seeing as how I didn't know how early I would be getting up. So, I mustered up all the strength I could and carried her, ungracefully, I might add, to her bedroom. I laid her down gently and tucked her in. I brushed a stray strand of hair from her face and kissed her cheek then left, closing the door softly behind me.

Considering it was already probably and hour past Rin's bedtime, I figured I would skip dinner, or what remained of it, and just turn in for good. I got to my room, changed into actual sleeping clothes and picked up my book. I read at least two more chapters before falling asleep. I was uncommonly tired that day.

As fate would have it, and only have it that way, I was woken again by a weight resting on the other side of my bed, causing it to sink and myself to roll ever so slightly in that direction. I yawned tiredly. Interrupted sleep is not the same as uninterrupted sleep, not by a long shot.

"If it's Jaken, come back in the morning, I'll help you then. If it's Rin, go get your book and I'll read more to you and you can just sleep in here with me. Unless it's an emergency, if it's anyone else, you are either an idiot for waking me up, totally clueless to how mean I can be when woken up, or a downright pervert for being in my room and on my bed not to mention." It's true, I said this all very sleepily and I don't think anyone would have taken it into consideration or even understood it.

The weight shifted as the person laid down.

"And if it is the lord of the house?" a smooth, deep voice inquired.

I fell off the bed. And it hurt, too. My heart stopped, then seemed to start up again, full throttle. And my breathing, well it couldn't even be considered human. But I regained my composure in record time, pulse almost back to normal.

"I said anyone else." I stammered nervously, pointing a shaking finger at him.

"Very well."

"Why aren't you leaving?" I asked nervously.

"I am not just anybody else. And as you said before, it is my castle."

"And so humble, too. My, the egotism is so thick you could cut it with a knife. What do you want, Sesshoumaru? If it's nothing, then let me get my sleep. I'm cranky without it."

"Humans sleep too much."

I sighed inaudibly and gave in, clamoring back into bed and pulling the sheets tight over me. I had found by then that he was not a person to do anything other than what he wished. So, hey, if you can't beat 'em, join 'em, right? Just for the records, I hate that saying.

"I happen to enjoy sleep and use it as an energy source." I replied haughtily.

"It's a weakness. And lost opportunity."

Now, I know I shouldn't have taken it that way, but he was laying on my bed in the middle of the night. Any normal girl would have taken it as a double entendre. Especially a married one who had yet to…ahem.

"If you want to tell me something, tell me then let me loose opportunity." For some reason, after saying that, I felt like a bad wife. Sure I would let a child and a toad servant bother me, but my own husband was out of the question. Guilt trip, majorly.

He was silent for a moment as if considering this.

"You did not come to dinner."

Oh hell, this guy was impossible!

"Astute observation, my lord." I sneered, unable to hide the facetious side of me.

"I thought so too." This guy was aggravating. An impossible husband. But in a way, kind of funny, in his own, very messed up way.

"Well, then, now that we're over that, is there anything else you would like to tell me? Perhaps comment on the fact that my hair is black or that the sky gets dark as it gets later in the day? Or perhaps how grass is green."

"Not during winter."

"My goodness. Another amazing observation. Ladies and gentlemen, stand back! I give you the man that doesn't miss a thing. Captain Obvious." I muttered drowsily without looking at him.

"Another observation, if you have no objections?"

"Fire away" I nodded sleepily.

"I have noticed that you are sleeping alone." With that, the covers were pulled back slightly and I felt him slip under the sheets and then they pulled back up to cover both of us.

I thought I was dying again. I almost had a panic attack. I almost screamed that he couldn't be there, that he was not allowed. I almost did, but realized that he had every right to sleep in a bed with his wife. I sighed, beaten at the moment. I should be the best wife I could, and that meant getting close to the person I would spend the rest of my life with. I curled up on my side, careful not to touch him, but close enough to feel the warmth radiating from his body.

"You are very perceptive, you know. Although, a bit behind. You see, I've been sleeping by myself for at least the past two weeks." I pulled the covers up higher around my neck, hoping he would forget I was there.

"A problem, that is. But one easily dealt with." I stiffened considerably, but realized that I must learn to deal with it. I hardly ever saw Sesshoumaru during the day, so perhaps if I slept in bed with him, I could use that time to learn about him. Just not that night. I was far too tired.

But I, despite my worries and doubts, would try to be the best wife I could. And that, like I had said earlier, required patience and trust.

I turned and edged over in bed, so that my head rested against the side of his shoulder. He, in turn, tensed and I was happy to see I was not the only nervous one, despite his calm façade. Ok, maybe I wouldn't go as far as to say he was nervous, but still.

I slid my eyes open and looked at his face. His eyes were closed and he looked like a living marble statue, each feature etched out in perfect calm. I knew he was awake, I sensed the uneasiness that he would never show to the world, ever. I smiled slightly and closed my eyes.

"Some problems seem easier than they are." I muttered, finally falling into an uninterrupted sleep.

_________________________________________________________________ ______

I slapped my forehead. Hard.

He had to be joking, right? I stared at the back of the small toad-alligator-pigeon-cross of a youkai who was marching proudly away down the hall. I promised to never critique anyone for their writing again. Ever. I mean, for a midget toad who could barely avoid squawking when he talked, it wasn't horrible, but man. Man. I mean, man. But, well, each to his own guess.

I had listened to Jaken compose the poem he had somehow managed to scramble up for Kero in that lumpy head. It went something like this…

How green your speckled skin does shine

How much your yellow eyes do bulge

I wish your oily hair were mine

Along with your perfect, webbed toes

Forgiveness is what I ask your beauty

For I am not but a humble man

And your fragrance, so rank and fruity

Makes one's stumpy legs forget to stand

You do not know your smile is smooth and sleek like oil

And I forget my words and thus my manners

As my temperature rises, forming great green boils

Opposed to your beauty which looks as if you'd been at the tanners

So I beg you do me this one favor

And stay your rightful malice

As I have but one request more

To one last time see your slimy bodice

Ahem. So, yeah. You get what I'm saying now? Well, I wouldn't exactly call it Shakespear, but I have to give him credit for trying. But you can see how I was kind of stuck when he asked my opinion.

"Do you think she'll like it?" He asked earnestly, his bugling eyes almost bugging out of his head.

"Uh, well, to tell you the truth, I find it utterly disgusting…" the bulbous orbs started to water as he tried to look dignified. "But-" I added quickly "in that really sweet kind of way. I'm sure she will be able to appreciate it more than I will…" I grimaced. What was I supposed to do? Write a poem for him? Oh no, I've seen that trick. Eventually the chick finds out that the person really writing the poems and speeches isn't who she thought it was and is terminally pissed. She usually ends up with the humble quiet person who wrote the mush and I didn't really think I would like the attention of a female toad youkai. I don't think I need to list the reasons.

So, with a quick motivational speech-I'm not one for speeches-I sent him on his happy little way, but not without giving him a nice bouquet of flowers to give to her. I figured that even if the poem was a bust-which it probably would be-he would have the flowers to fall back on. The damn toad didn't know how lucky he was to have me helping him.

"Good luck! Bonzai!" I cheered, shoving him out the door to where I knew Kero would be working. I sighed and leaned against a wall. Man, what a weird race. Take Kero's name for instance. Just plain weird. And, to me, it sounded more like a guy's name, but who knows, maybe toad youkai are asexual. Yeah right. The way Jaken reddened up when he saw me standing there in my room…no way. And, on top of the whole weirdness, they just looked plain…odd. Were they really toad youkai? Now that I thought about it, no one ever told me any different, I had just made assumptions. What if they were some warped, early relation of Godzilla or something? Oh boy. Overactive imagination.

I left the door heading for the garden, actually somewhat nervous for Jaken. But I got over that. It didn't take me long to find what I started to call 'my spot'. Even if I had been there only two or three times, no one else usually was there unless they came to get me. My spot in the garden was the one by the rose plant that Sesshoumaru's mother had planted. I liked it, for some reason, even though I'm not a huge fan of roses. I had other 'my spot' places, too. Like the hot springs. Unless I was teaching Rin how to swim, which she was learning very quickly I might add, I was usually the only one that used the pools. Mighty shame, but it only meant…more for me!

Did I mention the roses were white?

I sat down on a bench that I had found nearby, where the rose bush was still in sight and I could also scan a much larger portion of the garden. It really was breathtaking. It amazed me that something so beautiful and alive could live in such a place and have such a master. Sesshoumaru seemed so…cold. But, last night he had slept with me. I found it odd and slightly disturbing. Perhaps what I had said to him before had struck something. It was almost like he was trying to comfort me. He wasn't there when I woke up, of course. But this was a thing that needed time. And adjustment, for Sesshoumaru. The fact that he had just been there was enough. I just wished I could find out why he was so standoffish. Speaking of which, he had basically ignored me all of today. I didn't mind though. There was only so much a person could take of Sesshoumaru in a certain amount of time.

Did I mention that Sesshoumaru's nu-hakama is white, too? With a red, octagonal red pattern with flowers? Just thought I might not have. Odd, isn't it?

I was just beginning to settle in and enjoy my surroundings.

"Ah…finally…peace and quiet." I sighed, taking in a deep breath.

"Kagome-okasan!!!" It was Rin. I sighed, taking in a deep breath.

I prepared for impact as she flung her arms around me, tumbling me to the ground, straight off the bench.

"Hello, Rin-chan."

"Oh, Kagome-okasan…" she took a deep breath and I knew an entourage of words was coming. I knew Rin that well by now. I sighed, taking in a deep breath. "Ifoundthisbeautifulflowerplaceontheothersideofthecastleandpickedaprettyflo wer,butJakenyelledatmeandsaidIcouldn'tpickflowersfromtherebecausethoseflowe rsareforthegarden,buttheirsopretty,Kagome-okasan!" Don't try to make any sense of it. I didn't. Well, I did, but I was lost about half way through. She held out a flower to show me. Was that a poppy, I thought. That's odd. I remembered poppies not being overly common even in modern Japan. But it was beautiful. This amazing hue of golden orange that looked as if it had been born from the sun and fallen to take root in the earth. A golden poppy. Magnificent, really.

Did I mention his eyes are golden? But they're more of a yellow golden, as if they had just swallowed up the sunlight. They had this piercing quality that made you feel as if you were being watched my a hawk who considered you prey, but they also seemed to let slip a flash of emotion every once in a while. That must be the sunlight escaping every once in a while, I mused.

Rin handed me the flower and I took it appreciatively.

"Well, Rin-chan, it does seem like a waste for no one to see such beautiful flowers, but maybe you should listen to Jaken for now. You can ask Sesshoumaru about it later, ok?"

Rin smiled and nodded, then dragged me off to play, but after half an hour I told her it was time to do her studies. She whined and fussed but I promised to read her her favorite cat and mouse story, and do the voices for each character. She squealed with delight. Lessons were easy that day.

We had just finished lessons and I had decided to take Rin swimming to see if she could do it on her own. We were walking out towards the woods, this time with me carrying a bow and a quiver of arrows. Sesshoumaru had mentioned that I was a capable archer and made me take them with me when I left the castle. I had agreed to this grumpily, wondering if I would remember how to shoot a bow. He had looked as if he would smile.

"I know from first hand experience that you are more than capable." I hadn't asked what he meant by that and he hadn't told me. So me and Rin were-safely- heading towards a welcome bath when I hear someone clearing their throat. I turned around to find Kero standing there, gazing at the ground.

"What is it, Kero? Is everything ok?" I gazed at her, wondering how Jaken had scored on his repentance.

"Yes, but may I talk to you, Kagome-sama?" She had been surprised to find that I was the lady of the castle, but hadn't had any qualms at all and was more pleased that I had asked her to work for us, because of it.

I turned to Rin and asked her if she would go back to my room and get some soap; I had forgotten it, while I talked to Kero. Rin nodded and ran back into the castle. I sat down on the grass and motioned for Kero to do the same. She sat down, rather gracefully, at my side and twiddled her thumbs.

"What is it, Kero? Is something bothering you?" she shook her head and told me what had happened between her and Jaken. I sympathized with her and tried to get in an encouraging word on Jaken's part, but she wasn't finished, and I knew she wasn't.

"Then earlier he came to find me, to ask me to forgive him." She fumbled around, straightening her brown kimono, which was already pressed as flat as possible. I smile. It was so…cute.

"And…" I pressed on lightly.

"He wrote a poem…"

"A poem! That's wonderful! I didn't know Jaken had it in him." But I stopped when she looked a me, tears starting to make their way down her face. Oh no. The poem was a complete bust!

"It was beautiful…"

I almost choked. And she proceeded to relay it, word for word back to me.

"That-that's great, Kero! How romantic! He must really like you!"

"Do you think so?" she asked, pleadingly. I smiled.

"Sure thing!"

"Well, he did bring me this bunch of awful weeds that just smelled hideous, too, but the poem was beautiful. He asked me to go to the swamp with him sometime. Do you really think he like me like that?" I almost face faulted.

"Of-of course! Why else would he go through so much trouble? This is fantastic, Kero! But…what did you say?"

"I said I'd think about it."

"You wha-! I mean, of course you did. It's logical."

"Do you think I should go with him?"

"I don't know. Did you forgive him?"

"After a poem like that, how could I not?"

"Of course. Well, if you like him I think you should give it a shot, Kero. This is wonderful. This is more than I could have asked for. Definitely give it a try! You do like him, don't you?" She studied for a while and answered that she wasn't sure. Well, I couldn't have that, so I decided to use the same trick I had on Jaken.

"Kero, what color are Jaken's clothes? Can you describe them to me?" She didn't question me like Jaken had, just spilled it out right away, down to the last detail. "Describe him to me." She did, adding way more than needed. "Kero, I've reached a conclusion."

"What's that, Kagome-sama?"

"You totally like him. Beyond like. Hell, you just described Jaken in more detail, from memory, than I could ever try to." Or want to.. "There's no getting around it, you like him. Give him a chance, I think you'll be glad you did."

She looked up at me and smiled widely. At least, I think that's what it was. I smiled back happily. Rin wasn't back yet so I asked her how she was enjoying work around the citadel and was pleased to hear that she had nothing but nice things to say about all of the servants. In that way, she was different from Jaken. Maybe she could humble him a bit…

Minutes later, Rin was back, barely touching the ground as she hopped over to us. She looked inquisitively at Kero for a second. Then seemed to understand.

"Kagome-okasan! Jaken is getting married to girl her!" I guess she hadn't given Kero a good look when I had asked her to go back to the castle. My, how that little girl loved to jump to conclusions. Needless to say, Kero was a bit redder at Rin's assumption and continued to change hues as Rin carried on about all the little Jakens that would be running around. It was damn near hilarious. And scary.

Kero made up a good excuse and dismissed herself after a few minutes of Rin's insinuations, so Rin and I headed back towards our original destination. Hot springs!!!

I probably have, in fact, I'm pretty sure, but did I mention that the reflection of the moon on the surface of the hot springs is exactly the silver-blue color of Sesshoumaru's hair?

__________________________________________________________________ _____

AN: Hey everyone! I'm sorry this took so long. I was on vacation in Mexico and didn't have much time to work on it. Also, side note, Kero's name means "Ribbit" like a frog noise, I think. Don't ask. I was tired and didn't have a Jap/Eng dictionary handy. As for what Jaken did, I didn't feel like making something up at the time. Maybe I'll write it later. Well, what'd you think about the chapter? Kind of odd, huh? Well, please review!

Next chapter: Maybe some more trouble for the group, Kagome and Sesshoumaru get a little closer, and whatever else I feel like throwing in.

Oh, and in case you didn't catch it, my new email is

cloverx@sbcgloabl.net

As for the update notification list, I'm sorry, but I lost everyone's addresses when my dad changed the internet, so if you want to be notified when I update, please send an email to me!

See you all later!