InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ To Choose Another Life ❯ Nighttime Memories ( Chapter 7 )

Demoness: I have returned and I am not dead as most of you probably thought! The last few months have been a living nightmare, but now everything is back to normal and better than ever! My writer's block has dissipated and I am in full writing mode again. *proud smile* The guys under my hentai rock are especially excited about this since they finally get to see some action…This is the stubborn, idiotic, and problematic seventh chapter that I should have done months ago….Enjoy! Chapter is now edited!

No reviews….No Eighth chapter!

Disclaimer: *Borrows Mr. K's gun from Gravitation* PULL! *shoots disclaimer full of holes* Damn, I'm good…

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Chapter Seven: Nighttime Memories

As the pale moon slowly rose to glory in the night sky, the Colonel of the Western Army nervously navigated the mazelike hallways and corridors of the Castle. Rin's normally nimble fingers pulled at the silk fabric awkwardly, while her mind mulled over numerous thoughts. The normally calm and composed colonel couldn't remember the last time she had acted this way. `Come on, Rin! It's only Sesshoumaru.'

`Oh, yes. It is only Sesshoumaru, who also happens to be Lord of the Western Lands, and an Inu youkai. You've been under his protection since you were a child, and that's what he will probably view you as now for acting the way you are.'

Rin stopped dead in her tracks at the answering voice in her head. Sesshoumaru wouldn't really see her as such…would he? Sesshoumaru earned the reputation of being cold and heartless, and displayed it perfectly, but inside he couldn't be that way, could he? No, it wasn't possible. She had the opportunity to see the rare occasions he let his mask slip.

`If he can portray one role so perfectly…what makes you think he is unable to do the same for others? He is a demon, after all.'

At the utterance of that thought, her hands clenched painfully. He was more than bloodthirsty demon. He was an honorable Lord, who would never do anything unless he himself wished to do it. That was one thing she had learned over the years. She continued walking with the barest hint of a smile gracing her lips. There was absolutely no way to force Sesshoumaru to do something that he did not desire to do.

She found a new peace spread within her as her heart spoke in the softest, but strongest voice, drowning out all others. One hand slowly went to rest on her stomach in connection with her thoughts. `Sesshoumaru is the father of my child, he's intelligent even if he's a bit too arrogant, and he's fair and reasonable in all situations. He…he is the -`

Her train of thought was abruptly cut off as she collided with what felt like a stone wall. Startled, Rin looked up only to stare into very familiar ice blue eyes that held unconcealed shock. The figure immediately stepped back and bowed respectfully as Rin let a small grin grace her lips.

"Hikaru, I did not think I would run into you, literally, at this hour of the evening," she said in good humor as he straightened.

"Nor did I think I would be seeing my Colonel at this time, let alone up and about. Though, I am glad you are well."

The soldier gave her a small smile for her efforts, but she could sense that something was slightly off with him. She decided it was best to ask him at a later time. His ramrod straight back clearly stated that.

Rin inclined her head at his answer. "I will not keep you, since I have another matter to attend to. I better see you out on the training grounds tomorrow. You still need more practice in controlling you temper," she said lightly, but with a serious undertone.

Hikaru nodded and bowed again. "I assure you, Colonel. I will do my best to become a better fighter."

She nodded at his answer, and bidding him goodnight, she moved past him, continuing down the hall. Once she had disappeared, he openly let his disgust show. He smoothed the front of his uniform with his hands, trying in vain to remove her lingering scent.

"Yes, dear little Rin. You will see me out on the training grounds tomorrow, but I doubt you will be seeing those grounds and the Western Lord for much longer," he ground out maliciously and stormed away.

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Golden eyes scanned over the various flowers and plants around him, recalling the times he spent with his mother. She had always said that the gardens were most beautiful when illuminated by the glow of the full moon. It was as if the gates of paradise had opened, allowing her to enter and leave her troubles behind. After all the years since she had passed, he finally understood what she meant. He felt calm walking the moonlit paths, and it allowed him to sort out his thoughts that, as of late, had been tied in impossible knots.

Five days had passed since the barracks collapsed, and yet Rin still did not wake. Sesshoumaru's heart and mind where heavy with doubt as to whether or not he could trust the words of Shinsei and Shinsetsu. The normally composed and logical Taiyoukai even doubted whether he could trust himself at this point.

With all of his efforts he had tried to keep Rin safe, but everything had been in vain. He did not mark her so that his enemies would leave her alone, he stayed away from her whenever someone else was near, and he even pushed her away, crushing his feelings and, unknowingly, hers.

Sesshoumaru sighed and stared up at the dark sky, only to find Tenteisei looking down at him. The North Star had guided him in times past, but could not offer the guidance he desperately need now. He slowly began continued on his way as the night breeze began to stir. The scents of the flowers encompassed him, but a softer one captured his attention. His eyes widened slightly in surprise, which was all he would allow of what he actually felt.

The Taiyoukai moved swiftly through the garden and entered the small orchard located near the tree line. He casually moved through the trees, but his body was tense and alert. Rin - his Rin - was somewhere nearby. A flash of white caught his attention to his far left and he immediately followed.

As he rounded the last tree, he stilled as his eyes took in what was in front of him. There, standing in the glow of the moon, was the one who unknowingly held his heart.

Sesshoumaru kept to the shadows as he moved closer to her. His eyes were glued to her form, unwavering in their observance. He had thought her beautiful before, but on this night, she shone brighter than any star in the heavens. Her perfect ivory skin was illuminated to brilliance, while her eyes radiate warmth and care. The mahogany brown strands of hair had been left free, allowing it to dance softly on the gentle breeze.

His gaze traveled from her face to her delicate neck, to the rest of her body. His eyes widened in surprise at the kimono she wore, and he allowed a small smile as memories flowed back into his mind.

Before his thoughts could further entrap him, he watched her walk over to one of the apple trees and whisper so softly that even his superior hearing was at a loss. He took a step closer, but stopped as Rin backed away from the tree's trunk. It seemed to shake in laughter as one of its branches was slowly lowered. Rin smiled brightly and plucked an apple from the offered branch, bowing slightly in thanks.

The tree returned to its normal upright position and Sesshoumaru found himself hard-pressed not to laugh. He remembered all the times Rin had taken him to this orchard and gotten him apples when she was younger. The apple tree demons were more than delighted to have Rin around, and indulged her by letting her climb their branches and eat their apples.

Rin used the sleeve of her kimono to polish the apple, then simply looked at it, enjoying the simplicity. The silent Taiyoukai chose that moment to make his presence known. He stepped from the shadows and fluidly walked towards her. He purposely stepped on a twig, snapping it under his weight, and watched her head snap up.

The apple she held fell out of her hands to the ground as she stared at him in surprise. Her mouth opened once, but quickly closed. She was only able to manage a meek greeting. "Sesshoumaru-sama…"

He actually gave her a smile for that. He bent down and retrieved her fallen apple, holding it out to her. "There is no need for formalities, and I believe this is yours, Rin," he said in his normal stoic voice, but there was warmth flowing under the words. He could not hide his emotions when he was with her. She brought out the side of him that he had long thought dead.

She shyly muttered a thank you, but forgot to take the apple. Now that she was finally face to face with him, she had lost all trace of what she had intended to say. Her mind went blank, and all she could manage was to stare at the ground like a scared child. Silence reigned over the pair until Sesshoumaru broke the silence.

"I had hoped you would have woken sooner," he stated with a tinge of amusement.

Rin's head and eyes jerked up to meet his in annoyance. "I'm so sorry I could not have worked that out, but you know, it's kind of hard when you are buried under a collapsed building," she snapped out of annoyance, the fire returning to her eyes.

Sesshoumaru smirked. "Indeed it is. I was merely saying that I would have liked to be with you before this moment."

She was about to saying something else, but stopped abruptly. "You wished to be with me?" she asked timidly.

His golden eyes gazed down at her without their icy shell. They showed all the emotions he felt: guilt, regret, devotion, and unwavering love. He took one of her hands and placed the forgotten apple in it, covering it with both of his. "Rin, I must apologize if I have made you think otherwise. The only reason I pushed you away was to keep you safe, but I failed in doing so," he admitted.

Rin smiled, and shook her head. "You have not failed, Sesshoumaru, but you should have asked my opinion on the matter before you decided to do anything. I would have understood, and then we could have tried to find other solutions," she explained, and hesitated before continuing. "These past weeks have been hard for me to bear. I thought that night to be a mistake because of your strict avoidance afterwards, but…but when I learned I carried a child - your child - I didn't know what was to become of me."

She felt tears begin to well up in her eyes, but she promised her self she wouldn't give into the weakness of crying. She forged ahead, forcing her voice to remain steady. "I honestly felt that my life had been taken away, that I was robbed of everything I had worked for, but the comforting words of the people around me convinced me otherwise. You said you would stay with me and I want to always be by your side."

Rin stared up into his golden eyes. "You took me in when I was a child and I will always be grateful to you for that. Sesshoumaru, you allowed me the privilege to make something of myself in the army when you could have simply said `no' because I was a human. Through the years, I know we've grown closer and I don't know when my feelings changed, but I love you, Sesshoumaru!" she all but yelled.

Rin covered her mouth immediately after she spoke, realizing what she had said to him. She lowered her head, closing her eyes in shame. What would he think of her now after all that was said?

Rin kept her eyes closed as she felt him place a finger under her chin and gently move her head. She was ready for anything, but not for what came next.

Her eyes immediately shot open at the feel of his lips on hers, but they slowly drifted shut as she realized how right it felt. The apple she held slowly fell from her hand as she relaxed into the kiss. Silent tears fell from her eyes as her heart opened for him, knowing he would guard it with care. With his soft touch, her doubts and fears faded into memory, never to cause concern again.

Sesshoumaru softly broke the kiss and looked at her with caring eyes. Placing his hands on either side of her face, he wiped away her tears with his thumbs. "Rin I owe you an apology from the bottom of my soul," he began, his voice rough with emotion for the first time in his life.

"My actions over the past weeks were foolish and have caused more wounds than any battle. This Sesshoumaru's only wish is to see that you and our child are safe. I was warned once that I was being ignorant of your feelings, and I regretfully ignored those words. For once, my intelligence has failed me and I ask for your forgiveness."

Rin placed her hands on top of his and brought them down from her face. Staring up at him with a solemn expression, she gave her answer. "Sesshoumaru, I can never forgive you…"

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Demoness: You probably want to shoot me about now, but I will put my ass into gear and write till my fingers fall off. At least now you know the traitor and there is a bit of foreshadowing with him. I'm also working on physical profiles of all the characters and hope to post them in a type of bonus chapter. *sighs and smiles contentedly* This is all for now…until you read again! *Goes and plays in the snow*