InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ To Tell the Truth ❯ Closer ( Chapter 2 )

To Tell the Truth

 

An Inu Yasha fanfiction, By Serenanna

 

Part 2 - Closer

 

Warnings and Disclaimers: I don't own Inu Yasha or any of the characters. I'm just borrowing them to play with. I'll return them later after, promise. There is adult content and sexual situations in this story. So, if you're under 18, leave now before your virgin eyes are scarred forever, if you're over 18, enjoy! I do plan to get overly romantic and dramatic before getting to the good stuff so it's gonna be a long story. If you wanna get right to the goods and not enjoy the ride, please, go find another fic? Any modern songs used in this fic are not mine, I'm borrowing them because it amuses me to do so. Oh, and if male masturbation offends your sense . . . why are you reading an adult fanfic again?

 

Story Notes: This story takes place when our intrepid adventurers are still searching for the shards of the Shikon Jewel and battling Naraku, but at no specific time. This story is not meant to mess into the rest of the series, taking place as if it never happened. It is fan-fiction after all. At this point I do not plan any sequels, so please, don't ask? I am working under the assumption that these characters are semi-real people with hearts in their chests and heads on their shoulders, so it will be more realistic than most fanfics when it comes to actual reactions. If I wanted to write completely canon and to character, I'd just summarize the series, but you don't wanna read that do you? To this end, I am working under the assumption that Kagome is not used to the feudal era since it isn't her time, and vice versa. I also plan to be using music lyrics in the story, but it's not a song-fic per say, just go with it. I'd summarize part one, but if you didn't read it then why are you reading part two?

 

**********

 

Inu Yasha

 

I could smell the two love birds, and their aftermath, a mile away, nearly back at camp. I had seen enough and knew enough when the monk got to Sango's bare breasts. The scent only confirmed what I had already known, and I certainly didn't need to see why the monk was yelling more than his woman even if it did make me extremely curious. Miroku and the demon slayer were together in all senses of the word except in the eyes of their society, lovers but not married, in love and loved by one another, but not together forever till dead do us part just yet. It was sobering. The fact that, that lecher had not only managed to control his behavior but win the heart of a strong, beautiful, honorable woman was . . . unnerving. My heart thumped in my chest the more I thought about it. The look in Sango's eyes as she kissed him, wanting him, her legs wrapped over the monk . . . I groaned, hitting my head against the nearest tree. I was jealous of them both.

 

After all the times Kagome had sat me, or I've been slapped around, or screwed over, or have screwed up in general, I had never felt this much like a prize idiot. The one chance I had to have something like that and it got all screwed to hell by Naraku. Miroku was luckier than he could possibly comprehend . . . It was no use sitting there. Kagome would be worried about me. Keh, like that meant anything, she worried about everyone. I hopped from the branch, and started to walk slowly back towards camp, the scent of sex still on the wind. I would have to tell Kagome to take her time cooking the rabbits I caught. Those two would not be back for a while. I tried to clear my mind as much as possible, but it was no use, growing increasingly more frustrated the closer I got back to the site. I was no more than 40 yards when I heard something, my ears twitching as I sniffed. It was Kagome alright, and no one else. Shippo and Kilala were down washing up before dinner, hearing them earlier leave under the girl's orders. It sounded like music, probably hers given how loud it was. How could people of the future stand it? It would blow their ears out as loud as she had it.

 

I jumped up into the trees then sprang from branch to branch, intent on scaring her. When I was close enough to see her clearly, my feet stopped to a halt in stunned disbelief. She . . . was dancing. I blinked, dumbstruck as I sat watching.

 

It started out with a kiss

How did it end up like this

It was only a kiss,

It was only a kiss

Kagome had apparently abandoned her books for once, shaking her hips with abandon to the fast music. Her lips mouthed the lyrics, singing softly in not too bad of a voice. The poignancy of her choice in song was not lost on me. As she moved, I suddenly understood her culture's insistence on short skirts for their young women. Every time she spun, the pleated skirt flared higher helped by the fact that she pulled it up every now and then. I knew I shouldn't have been watching but I couldn't help it. The flash of white cloth and skin when she twirled was mesmerizing as I sat down. She had to be convinced no one was watching as her voice rose louder, stopping to giggle before the next verse kicked in. Was this how she acted in her home, with this much abandon? Did all women of her time danced like that? Was it something they were taught? The dances put on by the priestesses and in court seemed so formal compared to this even if it was more graceful and controlled. But . . . the way Kagome danced seemed more like . . . sex . . . This point was driven home as she started to touch herself, rubbing her legs and stomach before throwing her arms in the air as she twirled again.

 

Now I'm falling asleep

And she's calling a cab

While he's having a smoke

And she's taking a drag

Now they're going to bed

And my stomach is sick

And it's all in my head

But she's touching his—chest, now

He takes off her dress, now

Let me go

The image of Sango and Miroku kissing flashed in my head the more I watched her before I shook it loose. I didn't want to think of that when looking at Kagome. It was all too confusing to think about and the music wasn't helping with the implied love and sex in the lyrics.

 

Cause' I just can't look, its killing me

And taking control

 

For a moment I thought about climbing down and grabbing her as I stood up, but I couldn't. As brave as I was against my enemy, I was never that brave around women. My fingers gripped the tree branch, debating it with myself as a swirl of emotions, urges, wants consumed me. It would have been so easy . . . but I couldn't. The final chorus kicked in, and I still couldn't move, staring at her as she got closer towards the tree.

 

Jealousy, turning saints into the sea

Swimming through sick lullabies

Choking on your alibis

But it's just the price I pay

Destiny is calling me

Open up my eager eyes

`Cause I'm Mr Brightside

 

I never...

I never...

I never...

 

The song ended as she plopped down exhausted next to the music player on the sleeping bag, shutting it off as she panted. I . . . had seen enough to scare me away for now. There was no way I could look at Kagome till I had thought about everything I had seen that day. Turning on the branch to bounce off before she noticed me, my foot slipped and snapped on of the smaller twigs, driving a splinter into my toe as I cursed, “Shit.”

 

I blanched and looked at Kagome as she looked up at me. She gave startled gasp then yelled, “Sit!”

 

Fuck.

 

I wobbled on the tree, the spell yanking me off of it, and I went careening into the dirt face first with a loud boom. I hated that. My entire face and limbs felt numb from the impact and the necklace's effect as I groaned in pain. Kagome's angry foot steps reverberated through the ground, and I didn't have to hear her voice to know that she was pissed at me. I groaned louder but not so much in pain, wishing I had interrupted her instead of spying, but . . . it was worth it, kind of. “What the hell did you think you were doing? You scared me half to death!” She yelled as I cringed, the spell not letting up just yet.

 

I tried to move my shoulder a little and it worked, the rabbits rolling off onto the ground. “Oh . . .” Kagome said with a pause and I knew there was more coming, “Well, then you should quit sneaking around!”

 

I resisting cringing and finally got up, tossing the rabbits towards the priestess without a glance. For once I wanted to keep my big mouth shut, and if I did look at her, something dumb was bound to come out and then I'd be sat again. Looking away, I brushed my robe and pants then started to walk away. “Inu Yasha . . .” Kagome said softly as I froze a few steps from her.

 

Why couldn't she let me and my humiliation go? The irritation rattled at my neck, raising the hairs on the back of it. “What do you want?” I grumbled, eyes narrowing.

 

“Um . . . did you see anything while you were dropping off our dinner?” She asked as I suppressed a cringe. Caught. I very slowly turned towards her, getting ready to bite her head off, figuratively of course, for asking such a thing. And yet, I couldn't, not with the nervous smile she flashed at me as she sat on the ground at my feet. My stomach fluttered as I stared, dazed, then snapped out of it with a toss of my head. What was I thinking? I needed to cover up what I had done, not make her more suspicious. I lied, “Keh, like there was anything to see, I was just passing by . . .”

 

“Oh, well . . .” Kagome start, whatever she was thinking hidden under a bland expression before flashing an irritated expression, “Don't sneak up around me like that again, you scared me! And I mean it this time!”

 

“You've said it every other time, and meant it before, what makes this one any different, I'll do whatever I want!” I shot back, my irritation rising as well along with my frustration. It was only after the words were out of my mouth that I started to regret them. Shit. “Sit!” Kagome yelled and I ate the dirt once again.

 

Fucking bitch! Ok, maybe my fucking mouth was more to blame, but that was still cold. “I'm sick and tired of this, Inu Yasha! Just one day I'd like to not have to get into an argument with you! Just-,” Kagome yelled as she broke off into a scream of frustration, turning in a huff to walk off.

 

I'd chosen the wrong moment to look up from the ground, getting a nice look up as she picked up the dead rabbits and tromped back into the camp, blissfully unaware while the carcasses flailing helplessly from the cords I strung them on. A part lower than my stomach convulsed and I groaned, in both pain and frustration. Why couldn't I say anything right around her? Slowly the spell wore off and I sat up, miserable, confused and annoyed. I was never ever going to understand women. And now the monk . . . not only seemed to understand women, but was bedding one. I didn't want to think about it anymore, but I couldn't burn the sight or the scent from my memory. I wondered if Kagome smelled like that . . .

 

That thought was enough to catapult rational thought back into my thick skull. I was not going to think about that, no thoughts about sex and certainly not about Kagome. There was only one way to take care of it. I stood up quickly, sniffing the air as I yelled out, “I'll be back, Kagome, I'm going to take a bath.”

 

Picking up the scent of fresh water on the wind, I took off for it, sticking around long enough to hear a confused `huh' before I was gone.

 

**********

 

Kagome

 

Ever since that day on the trip back to the village, Inu Yasha got weirder. It was not necessarily a bad weird, just . . . weird. He was not only being silent now, but over cautious around me, like I was going to sit him for one false move around me, and most peculiar of all, he was looking at me more, his expression unreadable and thoughtful, but also unnerving. I couldn't tell why, but the longer he looked at me, the more I just wanted to snap at him to stop . . . or something. But still, it wasn't the strangest thing. The weirdest thing was that he finally took more baths. Almost daily now in the morning he would head for the nearest water source and clean up before we woke up. I only knew because he'd come back wet and smelling clean for once. But . . . it was still unexplainable to me. Did he finally find hygiene? I could only hope right? I didn't think anyone knew the reason behind it all except Inu Yasha. For some reason, I seemed to like him now that he did clean up. He didn't seem half a curt anymore, and was actually keeping his temper in check. I no longer had to `sit' him once a day just to get him to behave. And he actually tried to talk a little too when he thought I wasn't paying attention to him, which was different from his usual silence, gruff remarks, and arguments, even if it was not much.

 

Miroku and Sango were back to acting like a couple again, even if it was discreet between them, exchanging glances, smiles, holding hands. Sango was right, they were in love. I felt happy for them at the same time that I felt sad for my own problems. Inu Yasha was never going to come around even if I tried. Even if we were no longer fighting, he still said nothing to me that really meant anything. It gave me little hope that he was being anything more than just sociable for once. We were a day from the village and the well that night as I stayed up to study. I thought I had a handle on chemistry now and moved on to literature. We discussing the Tale of Genji in class, yet another test coming up, and I was stuck. By the time Genji had a third child from a different woman, I didn't want to read anymore and had put the book away. Sango and Miroku had taken up to sleeping closer to each other, still chaste, or at least I thought so. It had made me wonder the monk's intentions, but . . . that was Sango's business and she had Kilala with her anyway. The cat would scratch his eyes out if the huntress didn't want his advances. At least Miroku wasn't as much of a lecher as Genji was. I went to bed, the less I thought about reading that book again the better.

 

**********

 

Inu Yasha

 

I was being tormented. Ever since the day I stumbled on Miroku and Sango making love, I'd woken up each morning from an erotic dream with a bulge in my pants and the scent of sex in my nose. The first time it happened I looked over at the two of them curled up with one another and not sleeping like brother and sister anymore, and I knew they were the cause of it. The two of them reeked of it and I knew it. I could even tell that Miroku hadn't planted his seed in her, the scent around Sango the same as always even if it smelled mostly of him. From that morning on I had risen early and took a swim in the coldest water I could find. The fourth time I woke up like that, I had seen their covers pulled down too much from fooling around, and stared a few moments before bolting for the river. It was then that I knew that they had to be doing it on purpose. It was that or they didn't notice how their morning surprise was making me more and more irritable with each day . . . or it was just my imagination, again. It didn't help either that each new dream I had cast Kagome instead of Kikiyo.

 

I didn't know why it disturbed me so much that it was Kagome invading my thoughts and dreams, but it was disturbing. It was just a stupid dream wasn't it? That was what I was trying to tell my self that morning, one day away from the village as I waded out into the water of the near-by lake and floated on my back while lost in thought. The water had done its trick to freeze off whatever I had felt that night, strangely relaxing for being ice cold. I'd always been told that dreams were premonitions sometimes, but Kagome's world didn't revolve around superstitions and the mystic as ours did. She was the only one I knew who didn't believe in any of it even if she took everything else that had happened since her arrival in stride. Maybe that was what was disturbing me, the idea that I could bed Kagome if I wanted to. I shuddered and dove down into the cold water, trying to banish that thought. I loved Kikiyo . . . didn't I?

 

I popped up from the lake surface and rolled onto my back again as I treaded water. No . . . Kikiyo was dead. The woman I loved was dead even if her body and memory walked the same ground. I growled and dove under again, hating myself to have to admit it. Some part of that body was still Kikiyo, even if she smelled like old death and a hint of the wisteria that she once smelled like. And yet, I couldn't get the scent out of my nose of wildflowers from the dream whenever I did dream about Kagome. Why was I feeling like this about her? Kagome was an acquaintance, a companion, a tool to find the shards, nothing more. It didn't feel like when I was in love with Kikiyo. My mouth still worked around her for once, and I'd gotten better at holding a conversation without getting pissy at her or sounding like an idiot. She didn't make my heart race, or my stomach twist in knots, I didn't feel like I would die without her by my side all the time, but I felt like I'd died if I didn't see her face ever again. Despite all my lukewarm feelings, why did I want her still?

 

Lust, it was the only thing I could thing of. It was an admission, a reason, but it wasn't as unforgiving a feeling as love. I could control lust, I thought, but love was not controllable. Yes, lust. I didn't love Kagome, part of me just lusted after her. I'd never been with a woman before so the instinct that to kick in sooner than later, but it wasn't as bad as love. That was good enough of a reason for me. It was an explanation I could understand while love I could not, would not, understand. I could feel whatever I wanted to about Kagome in private, but I didn't have to do anything about it. And she certainly never had to know about it either.

 

I popped back up to the surface of the lake, seeing Shippo on the other shore, starting to strip down to jump in as well. “Hey, runt, go find your own damned lake!” I yelled at him, annoyed by having my thoughts interrupted.

 

“But Kagome said I should take a bath before we see Kaede again, and this is the only water around,” the little fox demon said with a glare and a whine in his voice. The kid was annoying but right. I splashed and headed in for the shore, deciding to tease him a little, “Keh, do you always do what Kagome tells you to do?”

 

“Course I do, I like Kagome, and she's my friend too,” Shippo said with a bright smile that usually melted any woman's heart, even if he was half their size. Even the kid was better at getting affection from a woman than I was. That still didn't make him as innocent as he appeared as he smirked at me, rather pleased as he spoke again, “I don't like to make her worry like you do, or make her angry and sad.”

 

What the hell was that suppose to mean? I grabbed the fox by his hair and held him high as he tried to bat at me, probably to scratch my eyes out. I didn't care what he felt like doing, he was pissing me off and he knew something, “What the hell are you talking about? I'm the only one in this little outfit that can take care of myself and still protect her, she's got nothing to worry about except getting snatched up by that asshole Kouga.”

 

“No, you're not, Miroku and Sango do just fine and I protect her too, you big delusional meanie!” Shippo yelled then stopped to look at me as he thought of something, and I knew exactly what word he was thinking, he didn't have to say it but he did anyway, “Even you can't defeat Naraku, you idiot.”

 

“Keh, yeah, I know that, it not like I'm gonna fight him tomorrow is it? Why's she worried about him?” I asked, getting more irritated. What the hell was his point? I could have guessed that on my own. The fox fought more, trying to knock the grip of my hand as he spoke, “I don't know, but she's worried about all of us going up against him, mostly you, you big idiot, or has the Tetsaiga replaced your head? She does care about you more than the rest of us, even if you treat her like crap, she likes you, you know, kind of like how my mom liked my dad, hupf, everyone knows it.”

 

I dropped Shippo, trying not to blink and act confused. Did everyone really know this but me? I didn't like to think I was blind, but . . . maybe I was . . . I lied to the kid, covering up the fact that I didn't know Kagome's feelings about me at all, “Keh, I already know that one too, runt.”

 

But really, I didn't know she cared about me alone . . . at least not that much . . .

 

**********

 

Sango

 

I was possibly as closest to heaven as I was ever going to get and still remain on earth. After Miroku's confession, I didn't have to worry any more that we were putting on a performance. I was right. I was in love with him and it was glorious, and he loved me in return. And to make it even better, our plan seemed to be working even if they still weren't talking. Each night we went to bed early and moved our bedrolls close to each other despite Kilala's growls of protest and Shippo's questioning in the beginning. The little fox demon seemed to get it after I explained to him that Miroku and I were acting like his mom and dad acted with each other. He had taken my cat to curl up with then, getting rid of that problem as well.

 

Just before dawn each morning, Miroku would crawl into my bedroll and we'd make love as best as we could without chancing the consequences of children. It was the best part of the day even if it was so tempting to actually feel the monk inside instead of his fingers. He'd hold me till we both heard Inu Yasha leave for the nearest body of cold water and try not to laugh at the poor half-demon till he was gone. If it tortured him, he didn't show it, but his leaving was indication enough that it affected him. After he was gone, we got up and cleaned, making sure Kagome didn't know yet. It was all according to plan. Miroku thought he had corrupted me with his perverseness when I told him, but it made sense, even to me. Love thus far was not proving a potent enough weapon against either of them, but sex had a way of making even the more level headed person irrational. The fact that both of us admitted our feelings for each other after ending up in each others clothes was strong proof of that. And with how quickly Inu Yasha left each morning only made it clear that it would be a matter of time before he took his frustrations, jealousies, and inner turmoil out on something else besides cold water.

 

We were just getting up that fifth morning and I already missed Miroku's arms around me. I was half-naked with my kimono and bodysuit hanging of my legs and arms when he pushed the covers off and sat up to retie his robes as he grinned at me. I couldn't resist as I bounded up to hug him from behind, planting kisses over his face and neck as I giggled. The monk's fingers stopped, his inner kimono and outer robe hanging wide open as he chuckled, “Sango, stop before Kagome gets up and we're caught.”

 

I didn't listen and moved around to his side, turning his head to kiss him hard. The monk groaned and grabbed my waist to pin me to him. My hand dove into his robe to grope his chest, a surprised murmur coming from his throat as he backed off. Miroku's dark blue eyes were conflicted as he looked at me, tempted but not wanting to give into it. He was tempted alright, half hardened against my leg. “I've created a monster haven't I?” He asked rhetorically, his hand squeezing my butt, his favorite part of my body “I thought I was supposed to be the lecher around here?”

 

“Shut up and kiss me,” I commanded as he grinned. He followed the order as I pulled him down on top of me while giggling. It wasn't until the monk put his hand on my breasts that we heard the clear rustle of fabric. Shit, it wasn't . . . Across from us Kagome had sat up, looking at us with wide eyes and a light blush over her cheeks. “Shit!” Miroku cursed and moved off of me, hurriedly trying to tie up his robes.

 

I turned beet red and sat up, not bothering with my cloths since she'd obviously seen just about everything already when we bathed. Kagome looked down, not saying anything. Very slowly she started to grin then broke out into a giggle. I couldn't help it either given the situation, giggling and laughing as if it was the funniest thing to ever happen to us. Miroku looked at us as if we were both crazy, shaking his head, “You two want to let me in on the joke?”

 

“It's nothing, Miroku, it's just funny,” I said as I calmed down enough to smile at him. The monk I think didn't like being interrupted, but . . . it was still funny to us. Dressed again, he kissed the side of my face and stood, “Looks like the charade is up, you talk to her, I'm going to get some more firewood.”

 

I could have thought I heard him mutter about getting rid of wood as well as he left, but it might have been me. Kagome had calmed down as I fixed my body suit and kimono, looking at me from across the small clearing, “I take it that wasn't the first time you two have done that?”

 

I nodded, “Yes, but . . . we haven't actually . . .”

 

“It's ok, Sango, I understand,” Kagome said with her normal gentle smile before she turned to root around in her backpack till pulling out a small flat box of grey in that material she called `plastic'. She walked over to me with it in hand, holding it out before me, “Here, if you're going to do that eventually with Miroku from now on, might as well not chance it and have any of those children he wants so much till we're done with Naraku.”

 

I blinked at her, “What do you mean? I haven't given him my maidenhood yet, I . . . don't plan on it, and what are these?”

 

Kagome smiled, sitting next to me, “In there is medicine from my time, it stops a woman from having children if she sleeps with a man.”

 

I gawked at her, not quite believing that she had these, “Why do you have these? Did you . . .”

 

“Sango, for goodness sakes no! I have them because they also make your period regular.”

 

“Period?”

 

“Errr, moon cycle? Flow? Whatever you call it?”

 

“Oh . . .” I said as I thought about it. That seemed like a good reason. Some of the girls in my village used to skip their cycles or get them one after another, which used to perplex most of the men. None of the local medicines could do anything about it, but it sounded like Kagome's time had figured out something them. She smiled at me as I opened the box, looking at the foil and the white an brown tablets, “Take the white ones for three weeks then the brown for one week at the same time each day, I'll get you more when I get back, maybe I can talk to my doctor and see about your own prescription without dipping into my own.”

 

“Thank you . . . Kagome,” I said, slipping it into one of the pockets of my kimono, a little embarrassed now that it was setting in that she knew. She . . . did seem understanding about it though, too understanding. And yet, her lips pursed as I knew she wanted to say more, but couldn't spill it. She was probably dying to ask me about Miroku. “What is it, Kagome, you are brimming with curiosity,” I said as she grinned.

 

“How is he?” she asked, the first thing I expected her to ask.

 

“He's . . . awake,” I said, interrupted as Shippo stretched and yawned from his spot in front of the fire. The little fox smiled at us and rubbed his eyes as Kagome went over to help him up. She treated him like her own kit sometimes, using her affection on Shippo when she probably wanted to use it on Inu Yasha. At least the little boy was cute enough and young enough to not be annoying compared to his older counterpart. Kagome's nose wrinkled as he crawled onto her shoulder, “Shippo, when was the last time you had a bath?”

 

“Last week at the elder's house.”

 

“Shippo, go find where Inu Yasha is, probably taking a bath too, and go wash up for me, ok?” Kagome asked, the mother in her coming through in her voice. The fox demon frowned and jumped down, padded off. “Ok, but shouldn't Sango and Miroku wash too, they smell just as bad.”

 

I went red to the roots of my hair. Was it that bad? Kagome blushed as well, “Shippo, go . . . please.”

 

He walked off reluctantly, and I groaned, my head in my hands. That night I forced Miroku to come with me to a nearby river to wash up. He didn't want to at first, even after I told him I'd make it worth his while, but changed his mind after I told him Inu Yasha wasn't the only person picking up our scent. I still made it worth his while though.

 

And . . . I didn't tell him about the pills Kagome gave me either, at least . . . not yet.

 

**********

 

Inu Yasha

 

After another night, and another campfire, we set out that morning for Kaede's village and the well, and I wouldn't have to see that woman for a few days. Ironically enough, I was looking forward to it even if normally I wouldn't. Miroku and Sango had gone down to a lake to wash the night before, thank the gods. All along the walk the other day, the mere scent of those two and a single glance at Kagome's bare skin was enough to make me want to run for ice water. I managed to resist it by a thread . . . so far at least. Damn her and her short clothes. I could understand it if the weather was hot, but she still wore them during the late fall when it was cold enough to see every bump of hair on her skin raised from the cold. Those skirts were maddening. Every time I looked at her naked legs that day, I could picture them wrapped around my waist as well as other parts of Kagome wrapped around me. It was just like every dream I'd had for the past week, and after admitting to myself that I wasn't delusional and merely lusted after her, it only got worse. I thought I could keep it under control, but . . . It wasn't supposed to be this hard, was it?

 

I really didn't want to think about anything being hard right now, the bulge in my pants just unnoticeable in the folds of the fabric. It was awkward enough admitting to myself that I wanted the priestess physically despite being in love with her previous reincarnation . . . and yet, Shippo's revelation didn't help me either. Kagome actually cared about me, and possibly in a way that was more than just awkward acquaintances. The more I thought about it the more obvious it seemed that she cared for me on some level. But, she just . . . didn't seem that interested in pursuing it. And the more I thought about that, the more it pained part of me. It was like I wanted her to feel something for me, maybe not love but at least physical attraction. And the more I thought about love the more I thought my heart would drop out of my chest like it had for Kikiyo. Maybe I was deluding myself into thinking it was only lust and nothing more that I felt for her . . .

 

Why was I feeling anything for her anyway, love or lust? She was clumsy, hot-tempered, too independent, too spoiled, too unfeminine, too troubling, too loud, and totally unlike Kikiyo at all. How the elegant priestess could have been reborn in such a witless girl? They only looked alike in the face. I'd never known Kikiyo's body under all those robes to know if they were that much similar, but I always imagined that they could be. Even that night in the dream I had, I dreamed about Kagome in Kikiyo's priestess robes, but it was different from previous nights, a nightmare. She moved like Kikiyo out of the mists but for some reason she disappeared before I could reach her and all I heard was her crying around me and the endless gray mists. The sound of Kagome crying as if her heart had been ripped out only increased till I shot up in the tree, rattled enough to nearly fall out of the branches. I had covered my fear though by heading for water again as if nothing was wrong.

 

Something was going to happen today, one way or another. I could feel it, and the more I looked at Kagome during the short walk to the village, the more I hoped it would actually go my way for once. It was raining when we showed up on the edge of the village, the weather dreary as Kagome trudged along with her bike behind me. To top it all off, it was cold as well as wet. The center of town was like a giant mud pit from the rain and the lack of grass to hold back the dirt. Shippo had run off to sleep at a friend's house tonight, for which I was additionally grateful that I wouldn't have to put up with him for a night. Unlike the patens Sango and Miroku wore that raised them somewhat above the mud, Kagome slogged through it, the white socks and brown shoes she wore becoming covered in it. But, at least she was making progress. I didn't move to help her, too self-conscious of being close to her to do something like that any more. I would have carried her on my back if I wasn't deathly afraid of feeling those legs wrapped around me. The monk didn't move to help Kagome either as he had a hard enough time helping Sango in getting through the mud without falling over either as Kilala slept in her arms. Their robes were clinging to the both of them, but at least they looked somewhat happy about it. My hair was matted down across my back, and the fire rat robes stuck to me, the wool retaining some of the warmth.

 

We were just inside the village and nearing the old lady's house as I ran ahead to get her when Kagome finally fell over with a squawk like a lame duck, and a sticky splat. I turned back to see her flat on her back in the stuff, slowly trying to get up but slipping down to her elbows with another yelp. I might have been tempted to leave her if she didn't yell, “Inu Yasha!” so vulnerably or so loudly.

 

Damn it.

 

I turned around, a curse hanging on my lips, but then it was instantly forgotten from the look in her big blue eyes, needy, pained, and partially afraid. She looked utter helpless, the water pouring down her hair and skin as I nearly froze. The rain must have been making me delusional. I rushed back to help her, the events of the past two weeks and my own foolishness melting away. Her arms shot up to grasp my neck as I tried to get a grip on the girl, her clothes soaked through, that heavy pack of hers still on her back, and her skin slick from the rain. The mud stuck to her, sucking her back in as I pulled up. If it was any other day, Kagome would have been light as a feather, but she felt like dead weight in my arms with all of the water and dirt, and was twice as awkward. My feet were caked in the shit as I tried to lift her up, but they slipped out from under me as I fell on my back. She screamed and landed on top of me, both of us covered in mud. “Keh, you could lighten up on the ramen, Kagome,” I grunted, standing up and lifting her at the same time.

 

She batted weakly across my back, giggling with a hint of sadness and humiliation, “Please don't make me laugh.”

 

What had gotten into her? I didn't ask as she slid the pack from her back to drop it in the mud. I finally got on my feet with the priestess in my arms, her head nestled in the crook of my neck, close enough that I could feel each warm breath on my skin. Holding her against me with one arm under her legs and probably up her skirt, and the other around her waist, didn't help me in the slightest either. Leaving the bike and the pack for now, I walked over to the porch with Kagome cradled in my arms. Miroku seemed to get the same idea as Sango nearly slipped again, awkwardly picking her up as the demon huntress gasped in surprise, her weapon dropping from her back into the mud. Kilila flew out of her arms under the threat of being crushed and ran up to the porch, shaking the water from her fur while hissing at the two. I felt odd just standing there out of the rain finally, trying hard not to realize that I was holding Kagome, who, from her silence, didn't seem to mind too much. “Inu Yasha?” she said, and something in my chest thumped.

 

Like a fool, I looked at her face as she peeled away from my shoulder, frozen again. The only thing I could smell was Kagome, her scent permeating through my clothes. She smelled like wildflowers, the scent only helped by the rain and the earth on her. It have been so easy to toss it all to the wind and kiss her, giving in to everything I'd been trying to fight, but I couldn't move, couldn't speak, couldn't think . . . at least not until Miroku climbed up the steps with his own woman in his arms and nearly tripped. I was suddenly very jealous as I looked at them, laughing, blushing, and all over each other that it made me sick to my stomach. Kagome was staring too at them then back at me, shivering, “Inu Yasha? Um, you can put be down now . . .”

 

Right.

 

I suddenly felt very uncomfortable holding the priestess as I let my arm under her legs slip down a little too quickly. With another squawk, Kagome found her feet again after nearly stumbling. The noise seemed to break Miroku and Sango out of their own little private moment as they looked at us, both of them suddenly very curious. Kagrome's arms released my neck and I let go of her back as she suddenly pulled away. A pink blush was forming on her cheeks as she looked away, a soft, “Thank you,” coming from her lips.

 

I blinked, almost unsure what to say. She didn't thank me often for the little things, “Don't mention it . . .”

 

`Don't mention it?' What the hell was I thinking? Couldn't I say something more intelligent than `don't mention it'? Uncomfortable standing there, and a little irritated, I walked into the house, pulling back the sliding door to find it empty of the one person we were all hoping to see. Kagome moved past me as she saw the one house was empty, finding instead a small scroll on the low table in the middle of the room. Sango wasn't too far behind her, looking over her shoulder as they read it. Miroku went in as well, moving to build up what remained of the fire in the small pit off to the side where Kaede usually cooked. It was at least a day old as it took some more kindling to build it up before the wood could be added. Why would Kaede leave her fire like that? Unless . . . ? With a sigh, the priestess curled the rice paper back up, almost crumpling it as my ears perked up, “Great, just great . . .”

 

“What is it? Where is the old hag?” I asked irritated to be left out as the two women looked at each other. Sango was frowning which usually wasn't good. Miroku looked up curious too as Kilala warmed herself by the fire, licking her fur free of the water. “There's been an outbreak of plague in another village pretty far from here to the south, Kaede left to go tend to the sick, she said it might be the work of a demon, one specializing in disease, but doesn't know if there's a jewel shard making it worse, and that she'd send word if she needs assistance and not to move till we heard something,” Sango said as Kagome's frown deepened.

 

“Oh, I hope she'll be ok, she shouldn't have gone alone if there really is a demon behind that plague . . . and if there's a jewel shard in the middle, it could be even worse,” she then stopped, still deeply concerned but frowning while looking at the huntress, as if she was making the decisions now, “Surely it'll be a few days though till she sends word right? Maybe it's not as serious as we think and I can go home for two days? I'll try to hurry back . . . I really have to take this test, and I gotta pass, but I'm worried for Kaede too, and-.”

 

Sango looked at me for an answer along with everyone else as Kagome stopped mid-ramble. Like any of us could understand when she mumbled about tests anyway. My eyebrows knitted into an angry sneer out of instinct. Why did this have to happen? I could have gotten rid of Kagome for a little, and not have to think and worry over her, or dream for that matter. That girl was driving me nuts, and without her around I could finally think about what to do maybe without just reacting. But then if Kaede was in trouble then we'd need her, and if she was in the middle of her school or whatever, and those stupid tests, it would take time to fetch her, but . . . Kagome was right as well. News and messages traveled slowly in our time, if she did send word, it would be a few day by horse, and the southern roads usually clogged along the rivers as they swelled from the rain. And we didn't even know if this was serious. Kaede said to wait, not go running after her. As much as I hated the old bag some times, she was Kikiyo's sister. Taking care of oneself seemed to run in the family's blood. There was no harm in letting Kagome go . . . I relaxed and shrugged, giving a non-committal grunt, “Whatever, I don't think we're gonna hear from her for a while, Kaede can fend for herself . . .”

 

The three of them looked at me like I had just grown a second head as I turned to walk out the door. Ok, so it was completely out of character for me, but if it got rid of Kagome, I was glad to act outside of my normal self. I went back out into the rain to retrieve Kagome's bike, her pack, and Sango's weapon before they washed away in the down pour. By the time I got back with everything, the door was slid closed and Miroku was sitting out on the porch in front of the door, not entirely too happy himself, “That was terribly out of character you know to let her go home so easily . . . even for you.”

 

“Blow me,” I grumbled and dropped the stuff down on the porch, snickering at the monk's predicament, “What did they do? Kick you out?”

 

Miroku nodded and I chuckled. Served the lech right.

 

“Would you expect anything less while the women are changing and getting cleaned up?” he said as I blinked, adding wistfully, “Not that I haven't seen Sango without her clothes on before.”

 

I growled, out of reflex if nothing else. If he ever saw Kagome naked, I would personally rip his balls off and shove them down his throat before ripping them out his ass. The monk seemed to get the idea of the implied threat in my voice as he grinned, amused that I was angry. “If I didn't know any better, I'd say you were jealous . . .” Miroku said lowly, and I wanted to kill him.

 

“Like hell I am! Just don't get it in your lecherous head to try your bull-shit on Kagome like what you've pulled with Sango . . .” I growled, keeping my voice down so the women didn't hear us through the wooden walls and rice paper doors, “What the fuck did you say to her anyway to get her to sleep with you? I never imagined she'd agree to bear your little bastards, willingly.”

 

Miroku's face lit up in red anger and I knew I hit a nerve . . . at least I think I did till he grinned back me, smugly sure of something. I didn't like it when the monk looked smug like that. It was as if he were mentally saying `fuck you' even if his lips didn't say it. Then something seemed to dawn on his face and he looked even smugger, and I was even more confused and irritated that he didn't want to get into an argument. I wanted a fight, something to take my frustrations out on. He stood up, mud still covering the bottom of his robes, “For your information, there is more two people can do together than intercourse, you don't know what you're missing.”

 

I went red in the face in embarrassment and anger, my voice tense as I had to struggle to keep from yelling at him loudly, “I'm not that much of an idiot, Miroku, both of you smell like you soaked in each others scent, but I know you haven't gotten to the goods yet, how did you agree to that after looking for so long to plant your seed in some woman, any woman that would take you? It's probably killing you that you haven't talked your way to her virginity yet.”

 

The monk chuckled, sneering slightly as it hit a little nerve from the hardened look in his eyes, and I calmed down enough to not want to wring his neck as he spoke, “For someone not jealous, I wonder why you are so curious as to my relationship with the lady, and so vengeful about it at the same time . . . I guess I'll never understand you, Inu Yasha.”

 

I snorted, “Does anyone even try to understand me?”

 

“Kagome does or at least has tried to, but you're probably too busy being absorbed with yourself to notice . . .” Miroku said as he turned to walk away. That was too low of a blow to not fight him over. Me? Self-absorbed? When we were trying to do some good in the world and get the jewel shards back, and kill that evil bastard Naraku?! I could die fighting that megalomaniac! How much more selfless could I be?! I opened my mouth to yell at him when the monk cut me off, changing the topic completely, “We're almost out of wood for the fire, and nothing out there is dry with this rain, I think Kaede keeps the dry pile in the storage room to the back of the house if you want to walk around and get some, I'm going to go meditate . . .”

 

I growled, really ready to kill him for saying such a thing without giving me a chance to rip him a new one, ordering me around as well. Exasperated, I grumbled and stalked off, ready to kill something after talking with that bloody monk. What was his point anyway? The lot of them criticize me all the time anyway, it's not like one more insult was going to change me. Regardless, I did as the monk asked, starting to walk to the back of the house to go get the wood. It was probably cold enough in there after being in the rain. I could feel the cool breeze pass through my clothes. The wood was right where Miroku said it would be as I grabbed an armload before shutting up the back room and starting to return to the front of the house. I was passing one of the windows of the main room when I heard a distinct feminine giggle followed by a splash of water that stopped me in my tracks.

 

For some reason the women had left the window slightly open, and when I actually looked in, I nearly dropped the wood.

 

Kagome was naked.

 

At least that was the first thing I saw as my eyes threatened to pop out of my skull. Sango had changed already out of her clothes and was in a thin yukata while the priestess sat on her knees with nothing on, dipping a rag in a small wash bowl before she washed the mud from her skin and hair while the huntress washed their clothes in a larger tub. The water must have been from the small pump in the house, and was probably warmed over the fire. Apparently it was still cold in the house as I could see every hair raised on Kagome's skin. She was paler than I thought without her clothes on, and pink, very, very pink when she blushed from the cold and scrubbing. “I can't believe that was how it happened, you really had to tie Miroku down?” Kagome asked as she grinned, giggling.

 

I carefully put the wood down and ducked behind the window screen, watching them through the crack as my ears twitched. I couldn't do anything but stare, hell, I probably didn't hear entirely what they were talking about. I'd taken glances at Kagome before when she bathed in the springs and stuff, but I never had a good view before from anything less than twenty pace, and here I was close enough to smell the scent of clean water from the wash tub. “Yes, among other things,” Sango said, turning red as the priestess giggled again, turning to let her wash her back till she faced the window, “But, it was worth it in the end.”

 

My eyes widened and I could feel my loins stiffen. I'd been dreaming about Kagome without her clothes for a week now, and here she was, and I was stuck hiding behind a wall with only a window. Kagome's face suddenly went from giddily happy to sliding into despair, sighing loud and longingly enough that her entire chest heaved before she said, “I doubt it would work on Inu Yasha.”

 

My face went as red as my robes as it finally hit me what they were talking about. Sango had to tie Miroku down? For what? The pervert's mind must have been rubbing off onto me as I filled that blank, especially after seeing them kiss. I had to bit my lips to keep from whimpering and groaning without giving away my position. I should have gotten the hell out of there as the combination of nudity and discussion on sex were playing havoc with certain parts of my anatomy. Just as I was seriously considering giving up spying, Kagome got a funny look on her face, part smug, part sultry, with touch of sadness, and I was rooted to the spot, “No, it wouldn't work for him, he'd snap any ropes in a couple minutes or less.”

 

She and Sango giggled at the joke or any further meaning in their words as I blocked it out. It was more than I could take as Kagome ran the rag over her arm, getting rid of more mud from her skin. I felt dumbstruck. I couldn't do anything but ogle at the priestess. She was slim and small with the exception of the long legs, and her wide hips made up for the rest. I could still picture her legs wrapped over me in my dreams, and suddenly looking at Kagome like this felt wrong. I shouldn't have stumbled onto this. I wasn't a perverted lech like the monk. I got up and out of the way quickly, bending over to grab the wood from where I put it on the ground. “I didn't mean that type of wood when I sent you to go get some,” I froze as I heard Miroku's voice.

 

Damn, he must have snuck up on me. Caught! I stood up and saw the monk standing by the corner of the building, looking highly amused. I grumbled and started to walk forward, keeping the stack of logs low in my arms to hide then bulge in my pants. “Keh, I thought you were meditating, monk,” I said, getting irritated by the look on his face more and more.

 

“I was, then you we're back too quickly, so I went to look,” Miroku said as he grinned, “I'm sure Kagome would love to know what you've been doing, how many times do you think she'll invoke that thing around your neck? Twenty? Fifty? A hundred? I wonder what her reaction will be if she learns you were getting off on watching her too, poor Inu Yasha can't even get laid.”

 

I growled, threateningly, so very close to knocking his block off, and the monk stopped while the expression on his face that was part pity as he looked at me, “I knew it, you are jealous . . .”

 

My eyebrows knitted together, about ready to drop the wood on his feet as well as hitting him. Since when did he get so nosy? “I am not jealous, you lech, why do you keep insisting that I am?” I growled, not letting up as I stared at him.

 

Miroku looked just as serious at me, thought not as angrily, “Then why else at the slightest mention of my explicit relationship with Sango do you either make fun of me, or look at me like you're going to bite my head off?”

 

“I only make fun of you because you're an easy target like Shippo, pervert,” I growled, purposefully keeping my voice low and tense as I got a little closer to stare him down. Miroku didn't waver. He must have been pretty sure in himself not to as he said, “No, you're jealous of what you cannot have.”

 

“Keh, why would I want Sango? She's your woman, isn't she?” I muttered back, increasing getting fed up and tense by his claims.

 

“Do I look stupid to you for something? I knew exactly what you're feeling ever since you saw me kiss her, and you can't hide it any longer behind your denials, you're jealous of me because I got Sango, that I love her, and she loves me, and you can't get it through your mangy skull to tell Kagome that you love her! Which you do, it just hasn't hit you yet under all your bullshit,” Miroku yelled in my face, his voice still low and tense so that the women didn't overhear us. I probably could have been struck over with a feather as his words sunk in from hearing them out loud instead of in my head. He was right. There was no way in all the hells that I'd admit it, but he was right. And worst of all he knew he was right too. Gods! Why did they want to punish me more by pointing out shit I knew but couldn't change?! I would never get anyone like Kikiyo back in my life, so why did they keep dangling Kagome in front of me except to torture when I'd never have her! I snapped and threw the firewood at his feet, tired of the meddling, “You know nothing about how I feel, no matter how fucking perfect you think you are, so stay the hell out of my business, monk, and I'll stay the fuck out of yours.”

 

Miroku looked at me shocked as I stalked off past him and into the rain as it had lightened up into a hazy drizzle. I could hear his feet turning on the porch, probably to look at me as he called out, “Where are you going?”

 

“To wash up and be by myself, stay out of it, Miroku,” I called back and then jumped, heading for the trees. I needed to be alone a little in my misery to think . . . now that I couldn't hide it any more, not even from myself.

 

**********

 

Sango

 

I heard the crash of something outside as I was working on washing Kagome's ruined uniform, and looked up. The priestess had started changing when she looked up, startled as well. It was almost a relief to hear Miroku and Inu Yasha's voices as Kagome went back to getting dressed after hearing them. She had grabbed one of her spare changes of clothes after Miroku slid her pack through the door after the half-demon had retrieved it, a small part of pants called shorts out of a heavy fabric called denim, and a stretchy tunic similar to my body suit called a t-shirt. At least it was marginally better than that uniform as she called it. I probably should have checked on him. Last thing I needed was the two of them to get into a fight. “I'll be back,” I said as I go up, drying my hands from the cleaning water, “Going to see if he got the firewood.”

 

I slid open the door and stepped outside when someone grabbed my wrist. I tried to gasp but a hand covered my mouth to silent me while they slid the door closed. My lips curled back to bite whoever it was till I noticed the dark blue wrap on his hand along with the lighter blue rosary beads. “Miroku!” I said forcefully, breaking his grasp on my mouth but keeping my voice down, “What is the meaning of this?!”

 

“I hit a nerve in Inu Yasha,” he whispered in my ear.

 

“What?!” I nearly yelled, louder than I intended as the monk shushed me down, hissing loudly into my ear. I could hear Kagome ask from the other side of the door if I was alright, and Miroku cursed, “Shit.”

 

I gasped again, but for a different reason as the monk spun me in his arms and pushed me up against the wall. I barely had time to think till I feel Miroku's lips on mine. I squealed at his aggressiveness, his tongue pushing into my mouth as I felt his arms grasping the back of my yukata. Was he insane?! For the barest of moments, I thought he'd pull the thin robe open right there on the porch, and I went numb, part excited, part terrified and mortified. But then his hands stopped and reached up to touch my neck and I sighed as Miroku pulled away breathless. It was only when I saw him turn his head towards the door that I noticed that we weren't alone. Kagome's eyes were as wide as plates as she looked at us, before she broke out into a nervous grin, “Um, I guess this would be a good time for me to go then, huh? I think I'll go find Inu Yasha, and say good bye till I get back.”

 

Before I could even get a word in, Miroku spoke first, “You might want to check the lake, he said he was heading that way to contemplate since the rain has stopped.”

 

“Thanks, Miroku,” Kagome said, beaming at me with a slight blush in her cheeks as I went red. The monk was so dead when she was gone! The priestess took a few steps off the porch and turned, shouldering her pack and weapons while she winked at us, “Have fun while I'm gone!”

 

Miroku went red as well as the priestess ran off into the forest, leaving the both of us staring. He exhaled, looking relieved and elated as he pulled himself away for me. I didn't know what the hell just happened, but it pissed me off. He had slipped into the house as I stood there dumbstruck, picking up some fallen logs off the porch that I hadn't noticed till then. I felt used by him for kissing me in front of Kagome, and why the hell did he send her to the lake after Inu Yasha, and what did he mean he struck a nerve in the half-demon? His secrecy was starting to piss me off as I stormed in after him, slamming the sliding door shut. The monk looked up grinning as he bent over the fire while putting more wood on it, still wet from earlier, “I'd say that was a wonderful performance, not to mention sheer dumb luck . . .”

 

My vision turned red and I slapped him across the cheek, yelling at Miroku as he went sprawling onto the tatami mats in front of the fire, “That's for not finishing what you started.”

 

The monk blinked, rubbing his cheek before he grinned at me as he understood, “My apologies, but I'll gladly make it up to you now . . . unless you would like to hear first why I just sent our sweet Kagome to the lake?”

 

It was my turn to blink as I tilted my head, forgetting for a moment about the kiss and being mad at him. Miroku must have liked making me confused and angry as he grinned then stretched out on the floor, his fingers idly playing with the tie on his shoulder of his outer robe. “I had some angry words with Inu Yasha, apparently he had looked through one of the windows while Kagome was cleaning up . . .” the monk said as I gawked looking at the open window on the other side of the room, “And he must have seen more than he had bargained for.”

 

I cringed, and dropped to my knees close to him, groaning, “Kagome is going to kill me if she finds out that he saw her naked! I thought I got them all . . .”

 

“It is fortunate that you didn't though since he has . . . developed a dilemma because of it, but I digress, I finally told the idiot off, and in his rage, he went to the lake, probably to take care of his problems . . .”

 

“You mean he-well, you know!” I started to say, turning red as I fumbled for words, “I can't believe! He saw that much?! And you just sent Kagome after him?!”

 

Miroku grinned and sat up, leaning closer to me as he nodded, his voice darker than normal as I could feel his breath on my neck, “Yes, she is heading after him now, and with any luck, she'll show up just as the show is starting, and maybe those two will finally get it through their heads how much they want each other.”

 

“It's not that easy, Miroku,” I said as I backed away from him, looking a little downcast that this could end well at all, “They both have a lot of issues between them, more so than you and me had, and none of them deal with sex.”

 

Why did he try to make this out to be so simple between them? I could feel the uneasiness about this new development chill me as I frowned. Miroku must have understood as he stopped and nodded before collapsing back down on the floor with a frustrated growl, “I know, Sango, but it's the best shot we got, you've been seeing what we've been doing has done to Inu Yasha? He's going to snap, I just know it . . .”

 

The monk broke off to smile somewhat hopefully, rolling onto his side to look at me. His voice had dropped as his grinned widened and I could just read what he was thinking even as he said it, “At least, everyone is out of the house now . . . except for you and me,” Miroku stopped a moment to look up, his eyes catching Kilala's sleeping form as he frowned, “Oh, and the cat.”

 

I smiled a little and moved to touch his hair, which was still damp, “Kilala won't mind . . . I hope you're right though, or else they're going to be even worse when they get back . . .”

 

The monk grabbed my wrist, grinning as he sat up. He let go but reached up to touch my cheek. My lips parted on instinct as he leaned over and kissed me. The anger I felt from earlier when he used me to send Kagome away melted away. I don't think I could truly stay mad at him long. Miroku truly meant it now as I reached out to hug his neck, feeling his arms tightened possessively around me. I could feel his lips twitch into a smile against mine, and I pulled away, grinning back at him as my cheeks heated. “I could let you tie me up again . . .” he said darkly as I shivered.

 

“Do you mean that? Really? Doesn't it seem . . . wrong?”

 

“Since when has `wrong' stopped either of us before?”

 

“Ahhhhhh, I hope those two take the rest of the day . . .”

 

“My dear Sango, you're not the only one.”

 

**********

 

Kagome

 

I plodded through the soft ground towards the lake, thankful that I'd switched out the loafers I usually wore for sneakers. I'd have to clean them later, but at least it was easier to walk in through the soggy ground. It actually felt better to be out of that uniform truth be told, and yet . . . I still didn't feel right. Inu Yasha's behavior was still driving me up a wall. I wondered if Miroku had lied to me . . . I mean, what if the half-demon was pissed about something, again, and he was sending me in put up with him? I hoped it wasn't true, even if I always brought along my bow and arrows just in case nowadays. The thought of it made me wish I had one of those enchanted prayer beads for Miroku too just to teach him a few lessons even if Sango seemed to have him under control by now. It was kind of ironic that those two had finally settled their differences and then some. I couldn't really believe it.

 

I couldn't believe I'd given her some of my birth control pills either. I didn't want to think about what the two of them were potentially doing alone in Kaede's little house, and certainly not before I saw Inu Yasha. The mere thought of it brought a blush to my cheeks that were cooled with a big breath of the cool, windy air that was coming off the water. I was close now if I felt the breeze. The lake was a far walk from the village, a good twenty minute walk given the usually lazy pace I went by, but as I heard the rumble of the waterfall in the distance I knew it wouldn't be far now. This would be simple. Just say hello, tell him I was leaving for the well, and good bye for a few days, and then to grab my pack and go. Simple as pie.

 

But . . .

 

Nothing ever really is that simple, especially since I fell down that stupid well.

 

I stopped in my tracks as I saw Inu Yasha's red and white robes hanging over the branches in front of me. Not far past them I looked up to a flash of silver hair among the blue of the water as the sun shone through the clouds, my breath catching in my throat. He was naked, his feet kicking at the rocky outlining of rocks in the middle of the lake followed by a loud, “Damnit!” as he gave the rocks a good kick before he sat down with a heavy groan, the stones splashing as I jumped slightly.

 

My cheeks went red when it hit me what I was seeing as I dove for cover in the bushes, careful not to rustle any leaves and alert him to my presence. I couldn't stop looking, the color in my face darkening as he moved back and fourth. He looked like he was in a conundrum, which would have made me giggle to watch him scowl and brew over his problem if I wasn't too busy ogling. For never having seen a man naked before, it left quite an impression on me of what a man should look like. He was lean, almost skinny except in the shoulders, arms, and upper back, but I could see every muscle move underneath his skin as he prowled around, tensed one moment then gone. The fact that his skin was still wet from the water helped too in making him glisten in what remained of the afternoon sun. And then my eyes dropped to his hips as he turned around to face the shore, going as wide as tea saucers at what I saw.

 

Oh . . . so that's what it looked like.

 

Well, I didn't expect to see him aroused when I saw that he was naked, but he evidently was as my blush deepened till it bordered on purple. It started to make sense now why his clothes were so loose . . . I shouldn't have even been there let alone kept looking, but I couldn't help it anymore, like a deer caught in headlights. I watched helplessly, too scared of being caught to move and too spellbound to look away. The half-dog demon looked up a moment, his ear twitching as if he heard something, causing me to hold my breath till he dismissed the noise. I almost sighed in relief till I thought he might hear that too as I held it. He groaned again, clutching his head between his hand and knees before covering his face while cursing, “Why in the hells can't I get her out of my head?!”

 

The spell over my eyes snapped at his words and I blinked, slowly, and I knew exactly who he was referring to.

 

Kikiyo.

 

Damn her! Why was it always about her!?! I bit my lip to keep from crying out in despair, the sting that he was pining for the corpse worse than ever. I had to get out of there. I was about to turn to run back to the village and onto the well when he cursed again, “Damnit! I'm supposed to love Kikiyo, not lust after an awkward, helpless lookalike! Gah, and she hates me!”

 

I froze again, my eyes going wide as my head whipped up to watch Inu Yasha again . . . was he referring to me?

 

“It is just lust . . . right?” Inu Yasha asked to no one but himself and the air as he glanced down into the water. For all his pride and bravery, the half demon in that moment looked more tired and weak in that moment than I thought possible. It was almost ironic, he had faced Naraku's demon armies and countless others out for themselves in our quest for the shards, and yet he looked absolutely scared of the idea that he could love me . . . I have go cover my mouth at that revelation. Could he love me? I sunk to my knees in the dirt, disbelieving that I had come to that conclusion. I shook my head. This wasn't happening. It couldn't be happening. My thoughts were snapped out of it as I heard a splash from the lake and looked up to see Inu Yasha's foot kicking at the water in frustration, scattering the stillness of the water as he gave a heart-rending cry. For a moment, I thought I heard a sob only to hear it chocked back as he growled then flopped back on the rocks, the piece of flesh between his legs still sticking up proudly in defiance of his anger, sorrow, and the cold water. “Damn Miroku, that pervert is corrupting me, I know it! If he hadn't been involved with Sango, none of this would be happening!” Inu Yasha yelled with another kick and splash of water.

 

He growled and settled down, not squirming so much as the water dripped over him. I could see every breath he took as he tried to calm down, my knees quivering at the sight. I was almost tempted to walk out from behind the bush but was too chicken give in to that desire. After seeing him like this, I didn't think I could have gambled so much if I was wrong. I probably should have left anyway, and was halfway back to my feet to beat a hasty retreat through the woods when I heard another longing groan from the lake and looked up. My knees gave way at what I saw, and I tumbled back into the bushes, not rustling them as my back hit against a tree. Inu Yasha's hand had dropped from being lazily crossed over his waist to touch himself . . . and I was watching him do it.

 

**********

 

Inu Yasha

 

I hated Miroku, not because of how lucky he was to have a woman let alone Sango, but because of how much that bastard monk knew about me. Damn him all to hell that he couldn't leave well enough alone. He was always meddling with someone or something, and now he was meddling with me, obviously, over Kagome. I groaned as my mind swirled at the brush of her name, driven by two things, the sight of Kagome naked, and my own licentious thoughts on her. Dreaming about her in that way was bad enough, actively fantasizing now that I knew what she looked like under those short skirts and baggy shirts. It was worse than ever as I sat on that damned rock in the middle of that damned lake, wanting her like I've never wanted anything else before . . . not even Kikiyo or the Shikon Jewel. “Why in the hells can't I get her out of my head?!” I yelled out across the lake, frustrated beyond reason, “Damnit! I'm supposed to love Kikiyo, not lust after an awkward, helpless lookalike! Gah, and she hates me!”

 

Kagome must hate me right? After everything I put her through, yelling at her, threatened her, teased her, argued with her, used her to find the jewel shards, she had to hate me. It pained me to think that she hated me, almost as much at it pained me to want her so much. Why did how she feel about me matter so much? Why did any of it matter? An unsettling thought came to me as I thought back to what Miroku had said, that she loves me, and that I couldn't tell Kagome that I love her . . . “It is just lust . . . right?” I asked to no one but myself and the air as I glanced down into the water.

 

In that instance, my mind snapped over what I had been denying to admit to myself, scaring me more than anything else before it.

 

I loved Kagome . . .

 

Crushing to admit, but I loved Kagome, even more than I ever loved Kikiyo. It was frightening how deep I felt for her once the thought ran through my head as my heart thumped in my chest. What was happening to me? How could I love Kagome so quickly after knowing her so long? What was there to love about her? Gods knew she wasn't perfect. She wasn't even truly a priestess. Kagome would probably always be stubborn and independent, but I wasn't about to change either. I think she'd nag me to death first before letting me win any argument. She'd never back down against me, and she'd never give in to anything, not even fate. And she always seemed to attract trouble or get into it, with or without the jewel shards, so it was never a dull moment around her. Plus she was loud, no where near as soft-spoken as Kikiyo. Kagome didn't radiate her kindness or grace either. You'd never know she was anything like her former self . . . except from the light in her eyes . . . and with what she actually did . . .

 

She did feel good in my arms this afternoon in the rain . . . and she was close enough that I could look in her eyes and see the light in them. She always did wear her emotions on her face, never a mystery like Kikiyo was. And no matter what I did to Kagome, which was a lot, she always came back eventually with that smile on her face when I needed her. I don't think I could have gotten rid of her if I wanted to. But she was so nice to have around, why would I want to be rid of Kagome? I'd never want to lose her like I lost Kikiyo. I'd be crushed never having her yell at me again, or hearing her laugh, or seeing the way her nose twitched when she read those books, or the way she smiled playing with Shippou, or carrying her around on my back . . . I'd even miss her telling me to sit.

 

The reality of that admission hit like a sack of stones. I was hopelessly in love with that troublesome, wonderful girl as my eyes widened in shock. There was no way around it. And there was nothing I could do about it either. I gave another frustrated, desperate yell, splashing the water hard as I wanted to crawl in a hole and die, flopping back on the rocks with a groan, trying not to show more weakness in the face of my own weaknesses. This was terrible. Not only did I want Kagome, but I was in love with her too. I was not only betraying everything I felt for Kikiyo, but corrupting what I felt for the girl with my thoughts. My loins pulsed with that thought, bringing me back to realization that I was still hard as a rock after the water did nothing to calm the fire. “Damn Miroku, that pervert is corrupting me, I know it! If he hadn't been involved with Sango, none of this would be happening!” I yelled, kicking the water again before growling.

 

This was all Miroku's fault, his and Sango's, for being unable to control themselves, then maybe I would never have realized how much I cared for and wanted Kagome. But who was I kidding? I couldn't control myself when it came to everything else. Lying on the rocks while staring up at the sky, I realized the futility of trying to fight it any longer. The others would miss me soon enough, and I couldn't figure out how to solve the problem of Kagome while being distracted so . . . noticeably. I closed my eyes, trying to remember the last time I'd done anything like this. It had been a while, not since that one episode two months ago when I caught that female demon near the camp one night sneaking up on Miroku. I made the mistake of not using the Tetsusaiga and touched her before killing her. It wasn't till afterwards that I realized she lured her victims by paralyzing them with lust. That had been a rough night alone feeling that stupid, but it wasn't as rough as this, pining for a woman I wanted without magic to cloud my head.

 

I could still see her in my head, the water dripping off her skin, and feel her arms around my neck, or the softness of her flesh under my fingers. Groaning, my hand drifted lower, touching myself as I let my mind wander back to the dreams of the past few nights. It was always Kagome in the priestess robes in them, but I could see her in my head well enough in that uniform. I didn't stop to think why as I imagined the young priestess kissing me, nearly able to feel her soft lips, wondering if in reality they were that soft. I'd probably never find out, but it was enough to start as I let my hand work, giving in to the idea of Kagome.

 

********

 

Kagome

 

I was speechless sitting there, watching as Inu Yasha touched himself in the middle of the lake. I think I learned more about the male sex in those few minutes than in a semester of an embarrassing sexual education class last year in school. It was mesmerizing as his hips thrust up into his hands, the sound of his voice in passion burning down my ears and skin. Each time was harder or faster than the last, sweat starting to mix on his skin along with the water. He looked like he didn't care about anything else in the world. And here I was in a bush watching him do it, wishing I knew whom he was thinking about in the first place for sure, me or Kikiyo. I wasn't mistaken earlier when he mentioned me, I knew it . . . even if he didn't say my name. I kept trying to look away, but couldn't. This was so wrong, I never should have been watching, but . . . God, part of me wanted him as much as he seemed to want himself.

 

I had to fight it as I sunk back against the tree, my legs pressed tight together to alleviate the nagging itch. I wasn't about to let myself be ruled by a need to scratch that itch and potentially ruin everything. This was stupid, impossible, he loved Kikiyo the corpse, not me, and I felt nothing for him either, right? Ok, I cared for him, or else I wouldn't keep coming back, but not enough to start entertaining thoughts of, well, passion. This wasn't helping me as my skin felt like it would burn off of me. I had to stop and think as none of this past two weeks made any sense, this one included. What had Sango said, that Inu Yasha was jealous of them? Oh hell, I was a little jealous of them as well, but why would it make the half-demon react like this . . . unless . . . A final cry reverberated across the lake as he finally came, his seed spilling across the rocks as I blushed from head to toe. It all finally made sense.

 

Quickly as I could, I pulled myself back up to my feet and darted back into the forest before Inu Yasha could notice I'd been there. My thoughts were in too much turmoil as I ran away as fast as I could to notice as my foot snapped a twig in my need to retreat.

 

********

 

Inu Yasha

 

My ears twitched as I heard the sound of a twig, laying there in the aftermath, still coming to terms with my emotions for Kagome. At first I dismissed it as some small animal, but then I caught the scent of something on the breeze across the lake. Wildflowers. There wasn't a field of wildflowers near by for a mile. My eyes widened as I remembered what the young priestess smelled like.

 

Wildflowers.

 

Cursing to myself, I quickly sat up and jumped off the rock, landing with a mild splash into the water. The scent only grew in pungency as I swam ashore, but I couldn't smell the source of it. Not wasting time, I pulled on my under-robe and hakama, stuffing the fire-rat robe down into the waist ties to hang around me, but not putting it over my arms. I couldn't be sure if I was really smelling Kagome's scent or just another demon making it up to trap me as I slowly grabbed the Tetsusaiga, putting the sheath in its normal place at my side. The smell only grew as I turned towards the east, near a shroud of bushes in front of a tall tree. Tracking the scent, I dove in to investigate, pressing my nose towards the soil, which in retrospective, was a mistake as my head swam from what I found. It was the girl alright, wildflowers, and concentrated, and some lingering sweetness to the air along with fresh water, probably from her bath. Gods, what had she been doing out here?

 

But, as I turned towards the lake and saw through the foliage to the rocks where I had just been, I realized the better question to ask was how much had she seen? “Oh gods . . .” I muttered, holding back from uttering the long stream of curses I felt coming.

 

She'd seen everything! And heard everything! And she'd seen me do that?! I didn't know what to think about this, simultaneously panicked, angry, and ashamed. How could I be so stupid? How could she have sat here and watched! I kicked at the dirt in disgust with myself for thinking that when I watched her as well without her knowing. But she wasn't touching herself! I growled, pulling on my hair to get the voices to stop. Think, you mutt, think! Maybe this was an opportunity and not a disaster; I just had to pull myself together. What if Miroku was right and she did care for me beyond friendship and the shards? I glanced back to the lake, frowning as my mind focused on that. Was I willing to take that much of a gamble on the monk's words? What if he was wrong and it drove Kagome away even more? And if he was right, and I did nothing, would she slip through my fingers again like Kikiyo? Or if I did profess my feelings, would I be cursing her? I'd already damned one woman by touching her, could I stand doing it to another? What would I do anyway when I did catch up to her? “Fucking shit, I'm not cut out for these kinds of things! Why the hell can't this be easy?!” I yelled again growling as I tried to make up my mind.

 

I couldn't take being this worried and scared about the future and the past anymore when it came to women since all it did was mess with my head. I knew only two things absolutely, I loved Kagome, and I wanted her, and nothing was going to stop me from at least telling her that much. Her scent was easy to follow away from the tree as I figured out what the sweetness in the air was with a grin. Apparently I wasn't the only one with a few nagging problems. That realization made me even more resolved that going after her was the right idea, and if I was, I was going to try to look somewhat desirable. I wrung my hair of water before using my claw to comb it out, moving back to the lakeside to see my reflection in the water. That was somewhat better even if I was still a little wet as I groomed behind my ears. At least I didn't smell wet as I sniffed my clothes to make sure. I kept the fire-rat robe off, hanging around my waist instead, and pulled open the under-robe a little. If she could show skin, so could I. I took one last look in the lake and tried not to frown, wondering for a moment if this was the `me' Kagome wanted, or if, like Kikiyo, she wished I was completely human too . . . but that was another problem to worry about, later, much later. The young priestess was on the run, and I wasn't about to let another woman go out of my own stupidity. I picked up her scent and started to follow it from the trees.

 

**********

 

To Be Continued in Part 3 of To Tell the Truth, Cold . . .

 

Preview:

 

“And what gave you that idea, huh? I never said anything to you, have I acted like I did? Everything I've ever done has done has been to help you because it's the right thing to do! I never asked for you to kiss me . . .”

 

My throat stuck before I could say anymore, choking on the lies in my throat. I may not have said anything to him, but . . . I had wanted him to kiss me . . . my eyes squinted shut as fresh tears rolled down my cheeks. He had no idea what I wanted from him because I had no idea what I did want. The only thing I knew I didn't want was to be Kikiyo's replacement for him.