InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Tortured Souls ❯ Painful Decisions ( Chapter 2 )

Tortured Souls

Chapter Two: Painful Decisions

 

“It's unhealthy whelp. The little girl is eleven now. She must learn her own customs, meet children of her own age. For heaven's sake, she probably is going to become a demoness if you don't do something!”

 

The plump youkai lady beside him continued her complaints, black-chocolate hair becoming increasingly distracting. The tai-youkai gritted his teeth, angry, but not enough to lash out, after all, Buyko was his nurse maid and the closet thing to a mother he had. The handsome woman was there when he needed, and often when he didn't. Twice a day she over-stepped herself, causing swift reparation. With a pout his anger faded and she'd leave to sulk. There was no winning with the brazen old girl. Nothing could be sane with her, but nothing functioned correctly without her guidance.

 

Her nagging usually was limited to Inuyasha, mating season, himself, or one of the bold castle whores. Today she'd chosen Rin. Usually the topic of his human ward was strictly taboo. Many times she'd spent the day sulking in the gardens, hurt because the pup she raised so carefully had gone against her. But a woman on a mission is one woman dammed hard to halt.

 

For the handful of years the human girl had been among them, a drastic change occurred in the lower regions of the castle caste system. It was the nervousness, fear, and hatred that came hand in hand when a being was confused, that kept tongues from spouting idiotic challenges. There was no telling what it meant to have the lord return, missing an arm and a child in tow. Mummers of a power struggle started to creep from class to class. Buyko, being the good woman she was, squashed the excitement of rebellion with the rumor his lordship sought a mate.

 

Of course she was promptly reprimanded by the youkai she sought to protect, after all, rumor starting was against the rules. Her punishment was quick, unserious, but equally effective.

 

As Rin's nanny, she'd taken a liking to a breed of being she originally disliked. The horrid smell of rapidly aging human didn't cling to her. She was refreshingly clean, despite her love of mud and pond water. Her scent was pleasant enough, like the smell of the first winter's snow. Her kind disposition, unhesitant obedience and naïve purity matched perfectly with her natural scent. She was easy to love and virtually impossible to hate.

 

Humans.

 

But her eleventh birthday had come and gone. She was still the same cute kid, a bit taller and skin deeply tanned, but none the changed. However, her eyes on occasion had the tendency to go….blank, to fix on a spot and stay unmoving for hours. She was reserved, almost to the point of being cold. Though given her every heart's desire, it did not equal the warm hugs and affectionate embraces she needed from Sesshomaru. She refused to allow other children to join her, enjoying her solitude. The anti-social behavior disturbed the wise woman more than anything else

 

“Sessho?” Are you listening runt?” He continued to scan the document before him, completely engrossed by its contents. Buyko peeked over his shoulder. It was nothing more than an informative document on the mating of his cousin and a member of the black dog tribe. She sighed.

 

“Rin was in an accident,” she said voice low, grieved and grave. His frigid eyes turned on her so sharply she took a step back.

 

“What!” he snarled, fangs glittering dangerously close to her face. He had knocked over the papers and upset the bottle of ink by launching himself at her in such a fashion. Buyko placed both hands haughtily on her hips.

 

“Pay attention next time!” she snapped. He hissed and sank gratefully down into his chair, squeezing the bridge of his nose in impatience. “The girl is better off dead unless you provide some type of normal human interaction,” she leaned against the closet wall, giving him a moment to let the words sink in.

 

“Come on, what damage can it do?”

 

His head jerked up quickly, eyes darting around the room from confirmation. Buyko was silent, staring intently for any realization to grace itself upon him, and no one else occupied the room. He groaned inwardly.

 

“You stubborn wench, go away. Leave me be.”

 

Buyko's head tilted, eyes gleaming mischievously. He hated that look. She always knew when SHE came; like they were allies against him, she always defended someone else, as if never agreeing with his way of thinking

 

The golden flare in his eyes froze when their musical laughter combined. One on the outside, the other within. He gritted his teeth, forcing the harsh words back, opting to communicate though glares. But the woman refused to bow to the temper to the tai-youkai. She stared back, the barely blue hue of her eyes a stark contrast against his yellow ones.

 

Their personalities differed, humorously with their features. Sesshomaru took after his mother in angelic beauty, misleading to his devilish nature. With silver hair and the Inu-papa, trademark golden globes, he screamed antisocial, and like a deity he stood out wherever he went, regal in every way. Idiots never took him seriously. Many lives had been demolished for such a foolish mistake.

 

However, Buyko was built like a warrior. Her strong and thick, muscular body was too manly. There was a mysterious quality about the girl that made you want more, to understand the slow smile she graced upon few. There was an attractiveness hidden behind her dark brows, high cheekbones and serious face. Although she always welcomed, her look turned many away. Just as Sesshomaru's eyes held no warmth, Buyko's held no ice.

 

Lady Buyko had spent her entire life dealing with Sesshomaru's attitude. She knew what made him tick and just how far to push him before literally costing your life. She knew what he needed, and often that was her favorite nagging topic, a mate. It was a strong belief of hers that nightly ruts and a castle full of pups would soften the edges right off his `holiness'.

 

“What're you gonna do Sessho?” I'm telling you, keeping that girl here is wrong. She needs hum-”

 

He slammed his fist on the desk, cracking the wood and scattering the documents once more. “Don't proceed in telling this, Sesshomaru, how to take care of one's charge.”

 

She grinned, “Down boy. I'm only looking out for the child.” He proceeded to stare her down, making sure she read his anger. In response her bottom lip popped out and her eyes drooped pleadingly. This was a look that rarely got denied, and in so he detested it.

 

“You've said your peace. I care no longer to be bothered,” he turned his back on her, ignoring the adorable whimper that she omitted. With slow, rueful steps, she shuffled towards the door. He selected the next document, a renewal of the treaty between the west and north. He tossed it aside, waiting for Buyko to finish the annoying crawl. With a groan the door opened and he watched, half amused, when she stuck her tongue out at him before disappearing into the hall.

 

With her gone, he allowed himself a ghost of a smile. She indeed was a most entertaining wench.

 

However, he had listened to her insistent prattled, and found what she said too true to be ignored. Rin was growing up, and she had changed. She was turning into a miniature version of himself in his younger days. Though he found no flaw in his character, he could admit that his personality wouldn't suit the child and her naturally pleasurable disposition. She was beloved to the youkai that attended to her because she was too innocently sweet to not adore. But lately the spells to silence and hours she wished to be spent in the seclusion of her room increased. Her smiles became vacant of the radiant happiness she used to burst with. He had been busy, not a spare moment to demand an explanation or accompany her on a picnic.

 

But the good of his clan came first, always. If Rin had trouble coming to terms with the lives of demons, he'd return her to the human world. Though his heart tugged at the notion, there seemed no other way. As her guardian and protector, her well being came before the consequences that would come with returning her to human society and depriving the ones that cherished her of her presence.

 

“Just admit you'd miss her.” The voice returned and he clenched his teeth tightly. There was no rest for the weary. He pushed aside the words, locking them behind his mountain of paper work. But he could not focus on the gathering invitations or the list of of-age youkai ladies and himes ripe for mating season. Not when his little charge suffered and he couldn't help her.

 

He rose from the heavily cushioned wooden chair, striding to the magnificent balcony over looking his entire domain, and most importantly, the field Rin was allowed access to. He watched as she gaily picked bright red firedragons and danced between the fallen sakura blossoms. It was one of the rare scenes in which she was almost her old self. The stupid toad, Jaken, watched her quietly.

 

A large group of laughter caught his attention. Today the youkai children learned of herbs. He watched as they lazily picked at the seiyo-hakka and nikuzuku, chewing on raw paseri. With a sigh he leaped to the ground behind a cluster of oaks, making sure not to catch any attention. He wished to witness Rin's mood and her reaction towards the children her age. He wished she'd skip over to the curious group and engage them in a game of rock-paper-scissors. But she just gawked at them with distrustful eyes, turning to leave instead of join.

 

“Rin,” he called to her retreating form. She turned hopefully at his voice, and when she saw him, she lit up; morphing into the kid he'd taken such a liking to. She stopped before him, looking upon his face with adoring eyes. Sesshomaru held back a smile. She was indeed an intriguing wench.

 

With a single pat to the head, like a dog from it's owner, he walked on past the group of chitterling youngsters. Rin wasted no time in following, immediately humming a little song in honor of regaining her beloved Fluffy's affections.

 

Much later in the evening, after putting the girl to bed, Buyko sashayed down the hall to her lord's room. She had observed the two of them all morning while Rin refused to let her Sessie-chan from her sight, and Sesshomaru graced her with little nods and much more patience than he lavished on anyone else. With surprised eyes she stared as the two of them climbed a tree. Catlike, Sesshomaru had no trouble getting up, but he struggled calmly to get down amidst Rin's amusement.

 

She'd come to a conclusion, Rin was in love with Sesshomaru. Like a daughter adores her father, Rin adored her protector. Like a puppy she followed with eternal gratefulness in her innocent face. She'd even warmed up to the children when they ate lunch by the lake. Sesshomaru didn't intake in the rich foods, opting to lie in the crook of his preferred tree, but even as his eyes flickered in sleep, a warm smile had placed itself on his face, just for a moment, but it was enough to nearly cause Buyko heart failure.

 

With a deep breath she stepped into her lord's room, enjoying the simple yet elegant décor. She found Sesshomaru in bed, propped up with a scroll in hand, no doubt information on his father's death. The event disturbed him greatly, for Inu-papa had died mysteriously, and the victor had never made himself known. But upon entering his sacred chamber, he closed the paper and set it neatly to the side. When he turned his golden eyes on her, she had to suppress a shiver.

 

“Have you thought more on what I've said?” she whispered, scared to raise her voice any further. He closed his beautiful orbs and gave a slight inclination of his head, a Sessie nod. Buyko rang her hands, “I believe I'm wrong,” she lowered her head in defeat, keeping her eyes on the fur covered floors.

 

“Oh?” he raised a perfectly arched brow, “I believe you're correct, Rin needs other humans.”

 

“No, m'lord. It took to this afternoon to realize it, the girl needs more attention-”

 

“Is that not your job?

 

“Yes, but-”

 

“Then why are we having this discussion?” he hadn't lost a beat, and his temper was still in check. Hers, on the other hands, had gone to new heights. “Listen puppy,” she growled at him. “Rin was happy today. It wasn't because she received a new toy, it wasn't because she spent a lot more time outdoors, but it was all caused when you spent time with her.” Sessho looked speechless for the moment, lips pressed together in a thin, tight line. His mind wandered. She had become three times as joyous when she saw him, that couldn't be ignored.

 

She had also asked him to tuck her into bed. He declined, of course, refusing to pay heed to the instant disappointment in her huge brown eyes, but with a single pat to her head she was all grins again.

 

But the situation was already taken care of. Jaken had located an old human couple eager to have grandchildren. Their son, a useless artisan remained wifeless, and their wishes were left uncared for. They agreed to take in Rin with laughs and smiles. They had land, and much money, Rin wouldn't want for anything. And their home was within a days trip from the western palace. The old woman knew songs and her husband knew much about herbs. It was perfect.

 

“I have already done what I sought to do. Rin leaves in a week.” It was strange how the words twisted in his chest, tasting like card board in his mouth. He wondered if the rumors could be true, he was getting soft. No, it didn't matter. With Rin out the way he could focus more on ruling his people efficiently and Buyko could return to her arguments on his mate-less life.

 

But the older woman was defiantly not pleased. With a sniff she turned on heel and walked back towards the door. He wanted to demand she come back and ask to be excused like a good servant, but he let her go. She was attached to Rin and she had no other children to take care of. As the late tai-youkai's mistress, she was not to be touched by any other man….forever. It was a lonely existence for her.

 

The fact remained the same though; Rin needed a change, good or bad. She'd been in his life for four years, and managed to turn everything upside down. She had to leave for her own good; she had to leave so he could be himself again.

 

The week had gone by far too quickly, and he attached himself too late. Seven days with the hyper active youth could inspire such feelings as love as the young lord forced himself to hide. With Buyko's urging, he replaced her usual personal servant, preferring to be attentive to her during her remaining time. It was almost…painful being so nice to her, especially for Sesshomaru who was inexperienced in such gentle kindness. After a few hours worth of memorable moments with his Rin he found a yet another new feeling to experience….paternal pride.

 

Thoughts of voiding the agreement between he and the human couple frequently crossed his mind. But to do so was to admit weakness, and he wasn't ready for that.

 

“Where are we going?” Rin asked weaving to and fro from flower to flower. She reminded him so much of a bee, drawn to nature and all things of sweetness and beauty. He wondered at times that if the intense infatuation she had for him was misplaced. She lacked a father figure, and for some reason she chose himself to be what she missed. It was pleasing to the ego, but yet, so confusing.

 

Though he understood a child's need for a good provider, and that he did, he didn't comprehend the equally important desire of affection. He didn't mind that she looked to him for protection, but it was when she sought out his approval; love…the human emotions he was incapable of giving, that he knew that their comrade was destined to fail. A little pat on the head, sometimes a ghost of a smile was all he was willing, though it gave her as much pleasure as any hug would.

 

Buyko, with her insistent screeching, had managed to get him to tuck her in at night. The ear splitting screech of delight Rin emitted when he bowed to her wish of the unusual, nightly ritual, echoed throughout the hallways of the castle, irritating some of the more frigid inhabitants like himself, but bringing a grin to the face of anyone who loved and admired the little human's spirit.

 

Now, as he watched her careen through the meadow like a furless animal, one of his famous and few, gioconda smiles came to his face. Such an annoying creature could be almost…enjoyable at times. With the wild, long brown hair flying carelessly behind her, she set her sights on her favorite pets, two full grown dragons she named Ah and Un.

 

After their many years of travel and fighting, the dragons had eventually grown to love their protectee as a daughter. Of course, like all dragons do, they split from the same body on their third birthday, and started to adjust to their life apart. Ah, as they soon learned, was a female. Rin had taken complete charge over the search party when Ah got loose to mate, and was a paragon surrogate mother to the eight baby dragons born to her.

 

Rin proved to be a great girl. Sesshomaru found himself in awe of her peace on more than one occasion. It was…inspiring to be by someone that truly enjoyed living

 

For her sake, he made up his mind. She had to go. The old couple would be good for her, smiling when she needed a smile, and could provide her with the love she so desperately craved.

 

Sesshomaru shook himself from his troubled thoughts, lowering Ah when the old couple's village came into view. He looked down at Rin to see her snoring lightly against him. He rested a hand on her head, patting her for a final time before landing beside the waiting silhouette of her new guardians.

 

Translations:

 

Seiyo-Hakka: peppermint

Nikuzuku: nutmeg

Inu-papa: the only name we have for Inuyasha and Sesshomaru's father

Hime(s): princess

Houshi: priest

Aji-Suki-Taka-Hi-Kone: the Japanese god of thunder and storms

 

I don't think it sounds right, I hate it, but I can't do anything about it until later! So sorry for not giving my all!

 

~Tru Valentine