InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Truth behind true love ❯ Truth behind true love. ( Chapter 1 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

Love isn�t a show of constant glitter and giggles, it can be quite the opposite. No matter what you never run away. [InuYashaxKagome.] Warnings: Minor O.O.C-ness, gore, character death, violence.

Anime/Manga: InuYasha Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Horror / Angst | Type: One Shot | Uploaded On: 12.02.2006 | Updated On: 12.02.2006 | Pages: 5 | Words: 5.2K | Visits: 708 | Status: Completed

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Title: Truth behind true love
Author: The laughing corpse
Genre: One shot, anime/manga, angst.
Warnings: Minor O.O.C-ness, gore, character death, violence.
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Love isn't a show of constant glitter and giggles, it can be quite the opposite. No matter what you never run away. InuYasha/Kagome.
Fandom: InuYasha
A/N: I can't see Kagome ever ditching InuYasha because of any run in with a necrophilia romp in the woods. I really can't, she has so many suitors and never takes up on any of their offers. Every boo-boo InuYasha does she always forgives him. This is the un-betaed version.
Disclaimer: I don't own InuYasha and I don't plan to.

Truth behind true love

Everyone admits that love is wonderful and necessary, yet no one agrees on just what it is.
-Diane Ackerman.

I felt alive beside him and that was good enough for me. Most of the time anyway. Can't lie and say whatever thing InuYasha does sits well with me. He isn't perfect but his imperfections are what I like about him. It's what makes him humane.

I sacrifice my lifestyle to stay here, in the feudal era, with him and help him collect the Shikon jewel shards. Although I am conscious I hold a responsibility to reattach the shards and make the jewel whole again I don't pay mind to it. I feel guilty to keep on wishing the shards never to be united and whole again.

Each day, each passing moment I cherish.

~…~

He saves me and always plays my hero.

Whenever trouble finds me he steps up and fights my battles.

I let him because it is expected and if I become strong he would have no use to stick beside me as he does. I can't have that, not that I could help it anyway. Does this make me selfish?

~…~

I go home for a day to collect and straighten my thoughts over the matter of Kikyou and InuYasha.

I ran away like I did before but now I flee from the ghost. Kikyou no longer walks among the living dead or living, or whatever the phrase better describes an animated corpse.

She is truly gone this time yet he mourns her death occasionally, this I can't save him from. Today he returned to the place where Kikyou perished in his arms. InuYasha sat there quietly for what seemed like passing ages.

I did not comfort him, instead I went home and sulked in my room with the excuse I have an exam to study for. When I came back I think I did the cruelest thing as of yet, I ignored the topic. I completely disregarded the topic moving onto other things.

Sango, Miroku and Shippou can look all they want. I don't want to hear more about Kikyou.

She's dead get over it.

~…~

Kouga comes and shoves his proposals at me to further annoy InuYasha. I always turn him down and anyone who has a desire to be my lover.

InuYasha's jealously touches me; it makes me believe he does like me more than a friend.

I know he does and I do too in return.

~…~

Tessaiga controls InuYasha's demon half. Lately, as I watch him, the control has been out of hand.

His violent streaks are becoming frequent, he even forced Miroku to fight him and the monk's last resort in the brawl was subduing him with a sutra.

I'm worried.

~…~

“InuYasha? Is something wrong?” I asked, after the others went inside Kaede's hut. InuYasha remained behind. I followed after him as he scurried quickly to The forest of InuYasha. I'm surprised I haven't lost him; his fast strides making me run after him.

He ignored me but I continued to chase after him. “InuYasha!”

“Go away, Kagome. Leave!” InuYasha growled in a tone far too deep to be his own. The voice startled me and forced me to a stop before I shook it away and continued on.

“Come back InuYasha!”

He stopped. He whirled around and slammed me against the nearest tree. Whatever breath was circulating inside me was rammed out, I gasped and whimpered. The pain of his clawed hands digging into my upper arms, they felt like mini knives biting into my skin. I felt the drip of blood soak my sleeves and I cried the longer he gripped me.

He leaned over, his heavy breaths deafening my ears. He smelled my blood; he liked the smell and showed it by lapping the dripping crimson. “Kagome…” he hissed, sneering, baring his long fangs out. Trembling and scared as I ever been I looked into his eyes when he pulled back to glare at me. He was so close we were nose to nose. His eyes were bleeding blood red, harboring unhidden malice a blood lusting youkai craves.

The mark on his temple, the jagged slash, confirmed InuYasha's full-blown youkai transformation. I trembled all the way to the marrow of my bones, feeling my heart race a mile a second. “InuYasha…no…” I said, my voice barely above whisper. I begged with all my might he regain his senses, but the longer he kept me there, intimidating me and growling at me like a wild beast my hope dimmed.

He was seconds away of ripping me apart. Tears filled my eyes and I cried out, “InuYasha! Stop it! You're hurting me! Stop!”

His face was no longer that handsome, almost beautiful face with that scowl he constantly carries. His face was that unrecognizable, a nightmare to stare at. He flashed a sharp fang and the same bloodied hand he sunk his claws in me caressed my tear-damp cheeks. “Kagome.” He growled my name over and over like a melody, like he heard it the first time and was testing it out over his tongue.

A clawed thumb grazed a thin line, cutting straight down my face. The sensation hurt but I dared not move or jerk him away. The bold move transfixed me. He brought the bloodied claw to his lips and licked it clean.

My throat's dry, I found it impossible to believe I managed to yell out, “Sit boy!”

Like a magic cast over, his beads glowed slamming him face first into the ground and before my knees gave out underneath me I ran out, clutching a pained arm bleeding profusely.

My legs slowed down and much to my disgrace I stopped and sunk to my knees. I didn't make it far. In fact, InuYasha's flattened form was a few feet away. I couldn't bring myself to leave him there alone. What was wrong with me? An emotional bout of confusion and fear stumped me, only my flowing tears and physical pain kept me from fainting.

Why can't I leave this? Why can't I run from this? Of course I knew the answer perfectly well, I was just too afraid to recognize it.

~…~

“What happened, Kagome?” Sango asked for what seemed the millionth time. She wrapped the bandages over the scratches imbedded in my arms. I winced each time she smooth the bandage down and wished she dropped the pattern.

I don't fault her. How can I when I come back here injured from an attack? I shut my eyes to block out her stern face and Miroku. “I don't know, it happened all too fast for me to have a good look.”

“We better have a look in the woods then. The demon that attacked can harm the villagers,” Miroku said, glaring at the doorway. He stood, tapping the sleeping fire neko youkai curled beside the sleeping kitsune in its miniature form. Kirara blinked, stretching, awakening from its sleep. “Come, we must search for the demon who attacked Kagome.”

I heard them walk out Kaede's hut. Sango gathered her weaponry and followed too, telling me to stay here and rest. They asked of InuYasha, I told them I didn't where he went. The last I remembered he ran off after returning to his regular form.

I had to come back to the village on my own with the events haunting me. This time I was too afraid to chase after him, even though I did wanted to despite what happened.

InuYasha, where are you? I think about him over and over, remembering the look he gave me. He looked worst than I felt. I mentally kicked myself for letting him go, I rose up and with immense difficultly gathered my bow and arrows, leaving out the door. Never turning back.

~…~

I searched for hours on end. I lost the path to Kaede's village long ago and I continue to wander in the dark woods. Sango, Miroku and Kirara must've returned home by now, I would if I knew how.

At one point I stopped and took a break to fix my bandages. I never thought InuYasha would physically hurt me this way again. He went too far and my worries he might go over the edge were bigger now. He might lose himself to his demon side.

The thought itself pushed me to my feet and motivated me to find him. Screams echoed the forest, the screams loud and haunting. I swallowed, looking for where the shrieks came from. Just when I think I might have solved that little mystery I find what I have been looking for and immediately regretted my luck.

I felt my blood run cold and heart slow. If I had the will I would have gouged my eyes out with the tip of one of my arrows to avoid ever seeing this. I stopped short of the scene. The ground allover was moist with blood. It looked like someone took two buckets full of red paint and poured it out allover.

That wasn't even the first that churned and turned my stomach. I had to hold back the urge to throw up spotting the clumps of flesh ripped off and shredded into pieces all dumped into a messy pile. The bits of purple and black were Miroku's monk garbs, it didn't take me long to fit the puzzle pieces together and figure out the slop of bloody, fleshy parts is what's left of the monk.

The furry head of Kirara lay abandoned across the clearing from the rest of her body. What horrified me and caused me to cry out in grief is what I feared finding. “I-Inu-Yasha!”

Oh God! I fell on my rear, covering my mouth as I cried out uncontrollably. Nothing I ever experienced in my life could ever amount to the pain I felt right now. The pain of it all swells deep within my heart. The pressure shortens my breathing. The gripping ache constricts my heart and crushes any word worth spilling from my throat.

InuYasha's red-coated ears twitched, swirling back like a dog does in its predatory mode. He dug inside the foul mess of Sango's midsection, ripping out punctured organs and engulfing them. His stained claws tore away more flesh, pulling ribs out of the way, tossing it aside. InuYasha's blood-red eyes glowed in the darkness, pinning me a scathing glare of warning if I dared come any further closer.

He looked like a mess; he was bathed underneath Sango and Miroku's essence. His soiled face snarled in delight feeding off of Sango's fresh corpse. I couldn't take watching him eat her little by little. I couldn't bear seeing Sango's crushed throat leak out and her rolled up eyes remaining open. She died in pain. She died suffering.

And here I am watching him. My world as I know it withered away, nothing could fix this and I couldn't do anything to stop him.

“Why?” Where was the Tessaiga? Where was that godforsaken sword! What went wrong? I asked myself hoping for the answer that will never come. Raising my head from my wet palms I found him towering over me. He was right there in front of me. All satisfied, and without the voice of his conscience. “SIT BOY! SIT!” I yelled from the top of my lungs. The subjugating word pummeled InuYasha to the ground. I said it again out of anger.

I reached for an arrow, propping it in the bow. I aimed at InuYasha as he rose, raising his filthy face towards me, no longer the demon menace possessing him. The remains of his sin covered him and he made no move to stop me or inquire what had transpired.

The dimmed gleam in his bright eyes was enough to say silently he acknowledged everything he did. “You knew! You knew what you did!” He closed his eyes, lowering his head, his stained bangs masking his eyes. “Why didn't you stop? Why!”

My trembling hands tightened on the bow, inching to release my arrow's redemption. He took his time to say his answer and I think I didn't deserve to hear it. “I had to.”

“You had to what?”

“I had to or I would go insane. This is what I am, Kagome. This is what I do. Demons kill and devour humans, I can't go on like this. I need to feed.” He turned to look at me, connecting eye to eye, without a trace of regret. The remorse he showed lacked immensely proving he sated his hunger and didn't give a damn he killed his friends.

He killed innocent people.

“Kagome, what are you going to do? Are you going to shoot me?” he stated the obvious with an edge of challenge I hardly knew came from him. “Do it. I don't want to hurt you.” Right there he meant it. His warmth ghosted over his last set of words and he depended on me to end him. Why does it have to be me? I don't want it to be me.

I really didn't want it to be me. I didn't want anyone to kill him. I did not want any form of harm to come to him.

“Why are you doing this?”

“I'm sorry…this is what I am. I can't change it or lie about it much longer.”

“I…” Speechless, I gradually loosen my grip on the quiver. What do I do?

“Dammit, do it! Go ahead, do it!” InuYasha snarled, the suspense of my hesitation diminishing his patience. He grabbed my wrists, shoving my weaponry to his chest. “Do it, you stupid girl!”

I should have. To do so would've been the right thing to do and justified. He slaughtered our companions to shreds and InuYasha had the gall to put his fate in my hands. I tore from his hold, throwing aside the bow and arrow. I stared at the mess he was and for once I was at a lost. “Stop it, InuYasha. I can't. I can't do it, stop asking me to.” I can't do many things for my own sake, piercing InuYasha with my arrows and leaving him is one of those horrible things.

I'm scared to be near him, I could find so many reasons to hate him right now and the reasons are justified. I want to go home and never come back again but I can't. Saying good-bye for good is even more frightening than taking all this in. I sunk into his arms, the thick sensation of filth wrapping around me the tighter I hold him and I cried. I let my tears out, not knowing what other option to take. Even after all this I love you, InuYasha. I can't stop loving you.

Perhaps I am a monster too, for staying beside InuYasha.

The End.