InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Unbridled, Unvoiced Passions ❯ Chapter 13 ( Chapter 13 )

Unbridled, Unvoiced Passions

A bittersweet love story

In the depths of a hidden room, a library aged with the written works and family trinkets of a long forgotten tale. Scrolls, held captive from the brutal maturity of paper, told the secrets of lost time, of forgotten battles, of legends and myths, but mostly of his unbridled, unvoiced passions.

The room, sealed by an ancient magic, is opened after nearly three centuries of dormancy. A girl's curiosity and utmost respect for all things lost to time discovers the secrets of the hidden chambers; a secret she was unknowingly a part of. However, opening the chamber just might have been the biggest mistake of her life.

Chapter 13

The winds whispered and danced upon the clear waters of the small lake. Its cool fingers reached up and caressed the long waves of dark hair, coaxing the powerful priestess to tilt her head back in pleasure. As it left her body, the wind murmured seductively to her, reminding her of her powers, of her journey, of her intent.

The woman bent and tilted her head down to the waters to inspect herself. It is said that eyes are the windows to the soul. If so, then why was it so hard to look at her own reflection? Was it because it was not her in there? Was she truly afraid to see what it was that she harbored inside?

No, she feared nothing!

She didn't like to kill, never truly wished harm on anyone actually; yet what was she doing now if not seeking out death as a measure? Dark, lifeless eyes stared in wonder at the keeper reflecting back the truth of the soul she harbored. Nothing, she felt nothing, and yet that was an unfitting lie.

Kikyou felt, she knew she felt because she wanted to feel. She was free now, she hated and she loved now; but something she did not do was an act she was actively submitting to currently.

Her fists curled around two small rocks, the knuckles turning white with the force. Her intentions were cruel and malicious; despite what another might think, Kikyou wasn't like that at all. She trained as a priestess, born to heal, to protect, essentially to love all things good. Kagome was in essence everything good, so why could she not find it in her to love the woman as she was born and trained to do?

She chanced another look into the lifeless pools of her own eyes. Droplets of water shattered around her, the image that seemed to burn the depths of the lake distorting to a mutilated blur as the rock burst through the still surface and sank to the bottom. It was just as Kikyou felt, mutilated and disfigured.

She could not stand her reflection any longer because she knew…she knew why she sought the death of her reincarnation. Kikyou had finally been given the chance to live on her own, free in every way…almost, and yet with Kagome here, she was still not alive.

Kikyou only wanted to breathe the air and feel it, she wanted to taste the bitterness of a ripened fruit, but most of all Kikyou wanted to feel the tenderness of Inuyasha's touch. With Kagome here, that was not possible and so that had to change. With a bitter taste in her mouth, Kikyou gently whispered to herself the truth.

"Jealousy"

She knew it; Kagome knew it…hell Inuyasha has probably figured it out by now; Kikyou was jealous of Kagome. Was there no other way then? Did she truly have to kill in cold blood as such for something others would deem nearly meaningless?

No, there was no other way. Kagome simply had to die.

With her resolution set, no matter how it disgusted her, Kikyou turned away from her reflection to face the one she had sought out. He had come for her, as she knew he would, but where he would take her was somewhere she had hoped to never go again. It took everything in her not to flinch when he addressed her.

"Kikyou, how nice of you to visit me"

She merely watched him to see what new tricks he was up to. True, she had sought him out, but she was no fool. He never came unprepared, so it was to her surprise that he simply stood and calmly waited for her to speak.

"To what do I owe the pleasure, priestess?"

She wanted to look away then; that word, that title, priestess…it wasn't meant for her. It hurt to be called such. And his voice, oh his voice felt like the cold bite of a sword on a winter's eve, crisp and clear, smooth and creamy, yet deadlier than a viper.

She wanted to turn around and never think on this meeting again. But she was not weak and would not let him think otherwise; instead, she steeled what was left of her soul in cruel determination and answered him.

"I seek return to the castle, but you seem to have managed to keep it even from myself…how clever of you"

His smirk was irritating her beyond belief. He knew he had bested her, even in the slightest of ways, and he liked it. She couldn't stand the smugness radiating from him just then.

"My my, I never thought to hear those words coming from you"

"Play your games with someone else; I do not have the patience for such stupidity"

Her strong voice belied her true composure, as it always did. She honestly hoped he would grant her request for this was really the easiest, though the most gruesome and unthinkable, of her options. Even though he was her enemy, she had come seeking his help and she was sure there would be a hefty bounty for this one.

The fact that she actually needed him bit into her pride and soul with a chilling hand of foreboding. Still, she could not turn back now. She had lived without companionship, died with the promise of love and life, and came back only to die again. Now that she was returned once more, Kikyou was going to live and she was determined to love; being resurrected twice must have been a sign, it had to be.

"What business do you have within my home, Kikyou?"

"The girl must die. I need to gain entrance to the land of the dead. Your home is the swiftest as yet"

"The girl, Kagome? My, my Kikyou…I never thought you to hate her so much. Did you not tell me yourself that you did not care what happened to her?"

Kikyou sneered at his observations; he did not have the right to taunt her.

"It is no concern of mine what happens to her, so long as my soul returns to me"

Was it going to become a habit, this lying to everyone? She sincerely hoped not; it made her stomach turn on her every time.

"Oh yes, the soul, I almost forgot"

Bullshit, he knew very well what she had wanted, needed from the girl all along; she had always wanted to live again, that was no secret.

"Are you going to allow me entrance or not?"

He seemed to think about it for a moment, though she knew he had made his decision before she even asked. It set her on edge to know that he would waste her time like this when it was obviously a pressing matter.

"Very well, but remember there is nothing for free. Come"

"Of that I am aware, Naraku"

With that, the two of them disappeared into the dense foliage of the forest.

^* _ *^

Kagome stared into the water and watched her reflection for what seemed like hours, when in reality it had been no more than a few minutes. She was searching for something in the depths of her soul, something she couldn't find and it aggravated her to no ends.

Something was different, something she could feel…and yet couldn't. It was a disturbing feeling, yet at the same time warming. This - feeling - was something beyond anything she had ever felt before and she didn't know what it was. There was no place for indecision in her and so she sought to reflect and figure out the strange emotions that moved inside her without her knowledge or consent.

Studying her eyes, the windows to her soul, Kagome sighed and dug deeper, but she was having trouble finding anything amiss. When she finally deemed the quality absent, Kagome fell back against a rock and rested her head. She was exhausted and angry, and rightfully so since she was lost.

Kagome had foolishly set out on her own to find one of the most elusive creatures she had ever had the `pleasure' of meeting. What's worse was that for her past three days of travel, she could not think of one good excuse to give him once she met up with him.

Truth, yes she thought about telling him the truth, but then reality came crashing down; she had no idea why she was looking for him, not really at least. When she had awoken in Kaede's hut and found that he had left, Kagome had been scared and not just a little hurt.

But what was she so afraid of? She still didn't know and she had been thinking about that since she had woken up. Yes, she realized that she was afraid of being alone, but what did that have to do with Sesshoumaru? The only thing she understood was that when he wasn't there, she had been frightened beyond comprehension.

But why?

He was her protector. Ok, that made sense, but was she not trying to prove that she was strong enough on her own?

He was training her. True enough, but she could find someone else to complete that task.

He understood her. No, that couldn't possibly be right; he understood her about as much as Myouga understood his wife…not a very promising thought.

Growling was never really her thing, but lately she just couldn't help it; it was a better option than screaming. No need to call unwanted attention to yourself, ne?

To make matters even better, her fever had never actually calmed and now she was faced with cooling weathers that taunted her with every step she took towards the west. The only thing that let her know which direction she was heading was the sun…so night travel was out of the question.

What was she thinking listening to her friends like that? What were they thinking telling her to leave so suddenly? What were they playing at?

Kagome shook her head to dispel the thoughts and looked down to Kirara as she leapt into her lap. Her thoughts would have to wait, seeing as how the sun was setting and Kagome had yet to even start a fire. That just wouldn't do; she couldn't afford to become any more ill than she already was.

After setting Kirara on the ground next her, Kagome stood and began her nightly ritual. Not thirty minutes later, the little clearing saw the dim light of a warm fire and rabbits roasting for supper while Kagome stood over the river once more, this time to bathe. The water was too cold to take an actual bath, so she decided on a quick sponge and washing her hair.

The water of the river froze the girl to the core easily, but she ignored it as she wrapped a towel around the freshly cleaned hair and made her way over to the nearby fire to serve the roasted meat.

Dinner was quick, which was becoming usual since her appetite was so small, and soon Kagome found herself snuggling up to a tree with Kirara and a blanket.

Come morning, Kagome would have to find a village for more supplies; she hadn't expected to take this long and so didn't stop before now. Perhaps it wasn't such a good idea to leave Kaede's as hastily as she had; it left her painfully unprepared.

Shrugging her shoulders lightly, Kagome slipped into a fitful slumber, completely missing the crimson eyes behind her.

^* _ *^

The woman was exhausted, that much was certain, but she held an air of power about her, he could smell it laced in with her natural scent. That could mean only one thing; this girl was a priestess. He was confused though, a priestess didn't wear such clothing, usually opting for the red and white one would normally associate with the holy blessed beings.

No matter, he could sense her immense fatigue and slight illness from his perch on the tree behind her. Even if she woke, the girl would not be able to focus on him long enough to fight him off. He might get a sting or two from her powers instinctual protectiveness, but that was a small price to pay for the delectable treats he would taste tonight.

Slipping into the shadows behind her, the demon smiled viciously and crouched low, smelling the air around his prey and purring in contentment. This girl would sate both his lust and his hunger at the same time, but that little cat demon had to go first; what a shame it would be to put an end to one that shared such a likeness to himself.

Shrugging his shoulders in disinterest, the male emerged from the thick foliage and silently stole the space between him and his prey. Usually he would prefer to hunt his prey in a more…avid environment, but this one held power and he didn't want to be crisp chops just yet.

The cat seemed to sense his presence first, pesky feline; made him proud to be of a similar race. But, as luck would have it, the girl remained blissfully unaware and dreamt on.

Fire blazed around him as the small cat defied her size and grew as she leapt from the warmth of her companion. Damn cat was going to wake up the girl and that was unacceptable!

He took in his options and decided that the cat would best be dealt with unconsciously. With his inherited agility, the male leapt into the air and brought down a whip onto the cats neck. Thankful for the speed he held in his lithe body, he quickly pulled the whip until the other feline's air supply was little more than enough to survive on.

The cat was angry and leapt at him with her fierce, fire encased claws. Another quick yank and she was on the ground, reverting to her smaller form.

The whip fell from her, the tip glowing red with poison, as she collapsed on the ground a few feet from the still slumbering priestess. His trusty whip disappeared into his sash once more. It was long, thin leather with a steady supply of poison that proved very resourceful.

An evil smirk crossed his lips as he looked down to the object of his desire. She would be more than enough to sate his base needs tonight.

^* _ *^

Something was there, she could feel its presence, a chill of malevolent intentions radiating like an inferno. Her fever burned and her head swam uneasily as she tried to open her eyes; was she really that sick?

Kagome knew she needed to get up, but she really couldn't move. Her body was an exhausted devastation of illness and fatigue; she would need to rely on her inherent powers.

She let her head lop forward; giving off the impression that she had passed out again, and concentrated on the aura around her. Kirara was injured and unconscious, but still very much alive. There was a strange black discoloration to her aura that Kagome vaguely recognized as the same type of poison Hakudoushi had fed her; it wasn't from the same pot, but it held the same signature. Realizing that Kirara would need her help soon, Kagome allowed herself to concentrate on her task at hand.

Finding her center was hard since everything felt upside down and inside out. She was a hairs breadth away from passing into blackness, but still she fought to find that peaceful place inside of her where her powers dwelled and intensified upon command.

The sea of her aura swam again, a dizzying sense that made her nearly scream in frustration. With a carefully deep breath, Kagome sought the lavender core of her aura and concentrated on spreading it.

^* _ *^

The cat watched in fascination as the girl's body began to pulse lightly, then stronger every few seconds. He realized that her powers were gathering to protect her, yet he still remained and watched in wonder. Such awesome power the small creature possessed; she was truly a marvel.

Fear built in his body as he watched on in a stunned sort of horror. His body disobeyed his every command, his very will to survive diminishing beneath the strange power of his prey. Vaguely, he realized that he had somehow become the prey just then.

The soft lavender mist of her aura stretched out slowly before him, crawling like an infant exploring its newfound movement. He watched both fascinated and strangely curious as it crawled up his leg, warm and inviting.

Fear shook his limbs, or was it her? He didn't know, but then he didn't care either; it was so warm and inviting, this power of hers. Perhaps she wouldn't harm him then; after all, it was in a priestess' very nature to be kind and forgiving. Besides, he technically hadn't done anything wrong yet, so she really had no reason to hurt him.

Pain raced through his body as the lavender disappeared into him, ripping his blood to shreds in seconds; he had forgotten how powerfully combative a priestess could be when faced with their sworn enemy, a demon. He never even had the chance to scream before the wind carried him off in ashes.

^* _ *^

Kagome lifted herself slowly from the rock and let her body fall onto the hardened earth around her. She could see Kirara from the corner of her eyes as her head lulled to the side and knew that the small demon was in immense pain. There was only one way to help her that Kagome could manage right now, and even that seemed impossible.

With more determination than she thought she had, Kagome turned onto her stomach and began to crawl to her companion slowly. The earth rocked and scraped against her clothing, tearing every here and there, small cuts forming in the wake of exposed flesh. Her stomach burned with the pain of fresh cuts being smothered by dirt and rocks, but Kirara was so close.

Her body suddenly felt like a lead bullet sinking to the bottom of the ocean, but as unstable as an ill woman on a boat in the middle of a storm riddled sea. Kagome pulled on the earth with her hands, trying desperately to pull her body along, but her strength was childlike at best. Kirara was barely a foot from her outstretched hand, and yet seemed a mile away.

Her aura was fading quickly and Kagome knew that her powers were needed now. Her healing abilities were the only way to help Kirara, to save her before it was too late. But her body seemed so heavy and at the same time light. Kagome's world was spinning as she tried to focus solely on her friend.

When had she become so sick? She was just walking today, miles upon miles that did nothing but exhaust her as they usually did. Why was she suddenly so sick? Why couldn't she even crawl a few inches to her friend that was mortally wounded? What was wrong with her?

She couldn't remember the last time she felt this horrible. Her head was pounding and swimming in a sea of black weightlessness; and yet her head never felt so heavy itself. Try as she might, Kagome could barely lift a finger without expending what felt like an enormous amount of energy. But she was so close!

"Kirara"

Her voice was soft and broken, barely a whisper above the silent winds. Still, her companion seemed to hear her. The faithful cat opened its dark eyes to lock on those of her mistress' sister and mewed.

"Can you…"

Her breathing was short, the air forcing its way away from her lungs. She couldn't remain on her stomach much longer, the air was too short and her body too heavy to stay like that.

"…come here?"

Kagome released a sigh of relief when she finally got the sentence to come out. Kirara, however, couldn't even find it in her to mew again. She watched the cat's leg twitch as though trying to move before her entire body went rigid and still.

A silent cry wracked Kirara as her body trembled and fell completely limp. Kagome reached out as Kirara's aura receded completely. With a soft pained cry, a single tear trickled down her cheek and dampened the earth below her.

"Kirara…"

No answer, but then she knew there wouldn't be.

"Kirara…"

How damning denial truly was.

"Kirara…"

She never could accept the truth.

"Kirara…"

Even when it was staring directly at her, literally.

With a painful outburst of energy, Kagome reached out and screamed to her fallen comrade.

"KIRARA!!!"

Her head fell to the earth, the world spinning around her like a dream from the twilight zone. She was disoriented, but couldn't focus on it; her thoughts centered solely on her friend.

How could Kirara die? She was too strong to die; this death was not worthy of someone so strong, so fierce, who had been through as much as Kirara had. Kirara deserved to die as a hero fighting a great battle, or just not die at all.

Kagome could no longer see her; she had no energy even to turn her head to see her friend's lifeless stare. She knew she was gone though; her aura was completely snubbed like a great candle whose wick had been cut off early…too early.

"Kirara…"

Her small whispered plea was carried away on the wind as the fire died behind her. With nothing but swimming pain to remind her of her failure to protect her friend, Kagome welcomed the dark world of unconsciousness.

^* _ *^

Cool winds bit into his skin, whipping the silver strands of hair forcefully around his body. The earth was shaking with fear and a familiar sense of foreboding and urgency. Something grand was on the horizon, waiting to display its devious plans.

He could feel the shift in powers, the malice that rose up to greet the solemnity of Mother Nature. Who would be so foolish as to disturb the dead? What would their purpose be?

Sesshoumaru looked to the bottom of the hill where a small valley of flowers ran the length of a shallow river. His eyes settled on his companion of nearly four and a half years; Rin was truly an amazing human.

Not a month ago she had celebrated the thirteenth year of the day of her birth. One more year and the child would be a woman by the human's standards. If you asked him, no human lived long enough to reach adulthood, but then that wasn't really their fault. Sometimes fate was cruel, but if one chooses so, they can still enjoy what is left after the cruelty.

Kagome had told him that; she had made him wonder then if she wasn't meant to be born into a demons body and not that of her human vessel. Perhaps then they would have been able to…

Sesshoumaru paused his thinking. It was no good to dwell on `what ifs'; that could only bring pain and heartache. Still, he couldn't help wondering how different his relationship with her would be were she to have been born unto his species.

He focused on his charge once more and let an uncharacteristic sigh of tenderness pass his lips. She would be angry with him for leaving in the middle of the night again, but he had to go; someone was approaching that shouldn't be there and she was flaunting her powers to the many dangerous demons that dwelled in the area.

With practiced silence, Sesshoumaru turned from the sight of Rin sleeping among her flowers and walked into the forest. Tonight he would find Kagome and make her go home.

There was one thing that was bothering him about her presence, though. She was alone with the cat; though the latter's aura was nowhere to be found now. Unconsciously, Sesshoumaru's steps became a little quicker.

It was fairly obvious that no jewel hunt had brought her this far away from Inuyasha. So what on earth was she doing here?

^* _ *^

Alright, so that's only just over 10 pages. I KNOW - it's not like me at all! I'm truly sorry for the short chapter, but I have a problem.

There may be a significant gap in updates starting now. I have just been hit with some -devastating- news and may not be able to reach a computer very often in the near future (we're talking Wednesday people).

So, in light of this newest turn of events, I have decided that I will be updating with two chapters at a time beginning with chapter 14…when I update that is.

I truly am sorry for this inconvenience, but it can't be helped. Please stick with me though…I WILL update; I refuse to abandon my stories! THEY'RE MINE DAMN IT!!!! eh heh, yes well, here's some review responses.

From ff .net: ch12

Thank you EVERYONE for reading, reviewing, emailing, or otherwise contacting me to let me know what you thought. It is greatly appreciated.

Anata no egao: (did I get that right?) Uh, anyhow, thanks for the support. hehehe

Peaches Dani: Kagome put him in his place? Hmm…we'll see!

Triumphantpicklej: This mistress now commands you to leave another review and pray, light a candle -whatever it is you do to lend strength to someone- for me…I am going to need it. nickel for a pickle? Lol

CloverX: Inuyasha told her to go because he knows what's going on between them and realizes that both of them are too stubborn to notice it themselves. Or, if they have noticed, they won't admit it or do anything about it for reasons only he and they know.

Born-Of-Elven-Blood: My you are an astute one, aren't you?! Lol It's ok. No, she hasn't read the third journal yet…and I'm not telling you if she will or not. As far as the whole, he obviously cares and so she's going to remember that, she does remember but she's in denial.

The third journal has a lot to do with the plot; we just haven't got to that part yet is all. Don't worry, you'll understand once we get there. Not only that, but she's unsure about all men for more reasons than just Inuyasha (that will be coming out in the next two or three chapters…next update). Just because he cares and she knows it, doesn't mean she has to accept it. Besides, she doesn't know exactly where in the journal she is `living' and events have changed somewhat because of her reading it. Don't worry, you'll see soon enough. Sorry if it's really too confusing!

Duchess: Well, if you keep complimenting me like that, I won't know what I'm doing wrong…because I know for a fact that I'm not completely right…no one is. Lol Just had to put in my word on that - you know me! Anyhow, hope this sates the taste for now. Sorry it's so short honey. Loves ya.

Busoshwe: Hon, if I remember correctly, I had stated that there have been formatting issues, which includes line breaks, etc. I'm sorry that the scene changes were so difficult though. As for Inuyasha: no, he's not a total ass… he's just hurting and confused and we all know that when he gets confused, he lashes out. That's pure Inuyasha style (well, in my opinion at least).

Black-Fire Eclipse: Sesshoumaru and Rin are travel companions, nothing more nothing less. She is his ward, however, and so he feels a need to take care of her, refine her upbringing, etc. Other than that, you could say that Rin is the only one that can effectively read Sesshoumaru and flip around his moods. If he's angry, she can usually calm him, so on and so forth.

Hakudoushi will be making another appearance, but not just yet. He needs time to regenerate his body and figure out the next move with Naraku.

As you can see, the reunion between Kagome and Sesshoumaru is going to be very soon, so hang tight and I'll have it out there as soon as I can.

Kuroi Tsuki Jyurian: Well, I'm glad you're enjoying the story. Trust me, it's been a battle and it's working itself into a war now. However, I do still enjoy writing it because there are even a few surprises for me once in a while. I hope to get the next two chapters out really soon since they are major plot turners. Cross your fingers or whatever that I can get them out quick, ok?

Esmilia: No, you didn't miss anything…well not really anyway. I've only been hinting to another `male incident' with Kagome throughout the story. That incident will be brought to light in the next few chapters, so hang in there with me and we'll get you unconfused. Lol

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Inu Lover 2004

Mystic Hanyou

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FataLFelineOfTheNight

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Mistic UV

Thanks all of you. I agree with most of you…I need more votes here on mm. org But they're a pain to get on this site…thank goodness for A Single Spark (now back UP AND RUNNING WOOHOO) lol

To anyone I missed. I'm sorry and thank you. Readers are my life. It's because of you guys that I finally decided to finish writing my book!