InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Upon a falling star ❯ he loves me, he loves me not ( Prologue )

Upon a falling star

 

 

 

**Author note: Here's a little taste of angst. I'm not real good at this kind of stuff so leave me a few reviews to tell me what you think. I could expand upon this if I think about it but I'll most likely leave it as is. Anyway please enjoy my newest work. **

 

D/c: I don't own Sesshy or Rin.

 

[Rin's point of view]

 

I knew I shouldn't have but I did it anyway. Sesshomaru-sama was going to be mad at me for leaving the castle like this but tonight it was a full moon and the sky was full of shooting stars. It's had been awhile since we all been home. I still couldn't believe how peaceful the night was tonight. It was like it reflected our lives.

Everything was quite and still as I lie down in my favorite spot looking up at the sky. I been with Sesshomaru-sama for over ten years now my body may have changed but my feelings for Sesshomaru-sama have not. He was still the only man I'll ever love, my second father.

Every since Naraku died Sesshomaru-sama has been more at ease and we all seem to have more at peace nowadays. Sometimes Inuyasha and Kagome-chan come over to visit us. Mostly it's still just us three like always only we spend more time in Sesshomaru-sama castle than outdoors now.

I try to count each of the falling stars but there were too many. I remembered wishing upon one that I could stay with Sesshomaru-sama forever and ever. Even if he is a demon he's never let me down and he has always been there for me. Even if I might irritated him or abused Jaken he still let me stay by his side for that I am grateful. I lay down watching the stars above.

 

"Rin," I hear his voice.

 

"I am here," I call out.

 

"What are you doing out here," he asks me.

 

"Just thinking," I tell him honestly.

 

He takes two steps so now he looking down on me still regal as ever. He still looks the same even though I have gotten somewhat bigger he remains the same. I can't help but smile up at him.

 

"What are you smiling about Rin," he asks me.

 

"You," I tell him. I giggled at the confusion that passes over his face.

 

"Enough of this come back to the castle," he orders me.

 

"I can't see the stars clearly from the castle Sesshomaru-sama," I tell him.

 

"You wish to look at the stars Rin," I tell him.

 

"Hai Sesshomaru-sama just for a little while," I say.

 

"Take my hand," he tells me.

 

I do so unhesitatingly for I trust him with my life. Even though it wouldn't take must for his hand to crush my hand into a million pieces. He lifts me up and before I know it we're air bound and it feel the night air blowing through my hair. I squeeze my eyes shut even after all these years I still a little scared of heights.

 

"Open your eyes Rin don't be afraid," he tells me as he squeezes my hand to comfort me.

 

I open my eyes and grasp, the sky looks so clear and the stars looks so bright. We must me at least million feet above the ground. The stars were so close I thought I could touch them.

 

"This is how I look at the stars sometimes," he tells me.

 

"You look at the stars too Sesshomaru-sama," I ask.

 

"Hai sometimes," he says.

 

I couldn't help but smile at him. Everything felt so magical at this moment. I wished wasn't so tried. It was times like this that made me wish I too were a demon so I really could live forever and ever. The thought of not having Sesshomaru by my side sadden me.

 

"Is something amiss Rin," he ask me.

 

"No," I lied. I didn't mean to but I didn't want to ruin the moment.

 

"Why do you lie to me," he asked.

 

I know he would notice my lie I couldn't ever get away with lying to him. I don't know how he knew when I wasn't telling the truth but I knew he could. Which is why I try really hard not to lie to him. What was the point if he could always tell?

 

"I didn't mean too Sesshomaru-sama but it's just," I couldn't finish.

 

I couldn't keep my silly emotions locked away like Sesshomaru-sama could. He never showed any emotion unless he wanted too or I forced it out of him. So I just cried like the little child I used to be and clung to only demon I could ever love.

 

"What's saddens you Rin," he said in his usually monotone voice.

 

"I doesn't want to leave you," I cry out.

 

“You will always be with me," he told me hugging me closer to me.

 

"But I'm human I can't live forever and ever like you Sesshomaru-sama," I tell him.

 

"I know this," he says calmly.

 

"I wish I was demon like you," I tell him.

 

"This Sesshomaru loves you for you," he says looking at the stars.

 

I dry my tears on my sleeves like a small child. Did he not understand? Maybe he did but he didn't care was that it? Surely by now he must know I love him more than anything in the whole wide world. Right?

 

I know it was a foolish love but I couldn't help it. I just couldn't see him as a second father anymore. Yet I know it was forbidden to even see him any other way. I was like a daughter to him and I should just be thankfully for that.

 

Yet when he says loves me for me I can't help but think there's a deeper meaning behind his word. What if he feels the same way about me? I wish that for once he could just hold me in arms and show me how much he loves me. I could wish on a million shooting stars and that would never happen.

 

`Impossible,' I think to myself. He doesn't like humans like that.

 

"Come its time to come back to the castle now," Sesshomaru said.

 

"Hai Sesshomaru-sama," I agree and hold on to him fast.

 

Funny how everyone says he's totally heartless yet I can hear his heart beating steadily deep within in his chest. I just wish I could have a deeper place within his strong heart.

 

Faster than I would have liked we touched down on the castle. He sets me down on the floor like I'm no more than a doll.

 

`I love you so much milord,' I wanted to say. I wanted to be embraced, to have his strong arms around my lithe body once again.

 

"Goodnight Rin," I hear him say.

 

"Goodnight Sesshomaru-sama," I tell him with a bow.

 

I walked to my room with a heavy heart. Will I ever be able to tell him just how much he means to me? Will I ever be able to tell him I love him more than he thinks? Or that I won't ever leave his side no matter what happens probably not. I simply didn't have the strength. I lay down on my futon with a heavy sigh.

 

"I love you so much Sesshomaru-sama. It hurts so bad feeling this way, why can't you understand," I cried into the sheets beneath me.

 

It just isn't meant to be I know that but I can't help it. I have been in love with him for the longest time now and I know he will never return it. I guess I will just have to live that fact. Yet I can't but think how handsome he looked upon those falling stars tonight.

 

{End}

 

{A/n: there you have it. I not really good at any Rin/Sesshomaru paring so if I went on with this idea I would mostly likely mess it up big time. I can't see Sesshomaru looking at Rin anything more than a daughter. Thumb up to the few authors on here who can see their relationship in other perspectives and can actually make it work. Well if you think I did an okay job please review.}

 

New note: August 31, 2005: Well I got an e-mail from a dear friend of mines who I used to do these fics for. Sadly now she's a across the country I hadn't hear for her in months. Well to make a long story short she made me revise this and update this. So yeah I feel like writing again.