InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ War's Shadow ❯ Torn ( Chapter 27 )

[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]

27 - Torn



It was only natural that she would be the history teacher. Zadi supposed the position could have just as easily been filled by Koron or one of the others. She was not the oldest in the village, even at her advanced age, but she was the most educated and she was able to relate a good deal of their tribe's more recent history simply by traipsing through old memories; remembrances that opened like gates and sent her down paths she had almost forgotten were there. It made her happy to share these things she had seen with children that were so wide-eyed and inquisitive. And sheltered, she added the mental thought.

She looked out at the small assembled group of bright-faced children; most were seated cross-legged, hands folded in their laps, listening to her words as she tried to coat them with colorful descriptions and imitate the voices. The depth of the tales changed with the age of the children she was speaking to, but she could admit to taking a perverse pleasure in voicing Eizan with a melodramatic flair that tended to make the children giggle. There was a time when she would not have felt he was a funny subject at all; but he was gone, and she could turn a blind eye to him for the first time in a century.

She had trailed off the subject; she was supposed to be covering the many and varied reasons behind their move to northern Japan in the first place. But the children had begun pestering her with questions about her absence, inquiries she had been putting off for weeks now, unwilling to cling to that time, to delve into it; she had only wanted to resume her life and some normalcy, return to a time when a certain dog demon's face had not haunted the backs of her eyelids every time she closed them. But with the passage of time came a relief and a fondness for things that, at the time, were anything but funny.

"It's good that he's dead!" chirped one of the boys from the back. "Demons are horrible! But we don't have to worry about them anymore, right, Zadi?"

"Not all demons are bad people," she admonished.

"Like the ones you made friends with?"

"Right," she slowly agreed. Well, not exactly true, but how does one explain to children that it had been so easy to befriend someone who was absolutely capable of being so detestable? "One of my very dearest friends is a demon. And just like not all demons are bad, not all humans are good. We each have our share of bo---," she stopped then and looked upward, toward the curtained doorway as something rang an alarm to her senses.

Youki. The outside was filled with the orderly noise of day, distant chatter, hammering, the thumping of a hoe being shoved into the earth of someone's garden. She was still and silent for so long that the children began to prompt her.

"Zadi?"

And she could feel it rising. Then the first shout, and her heart jumped, but she recognized this...

"You are dismissed. Go home for the day," she mumbled in what she hoped were coherent sentences, but she got to her feet and rushed outside, feet pulling her toward that feeling, pure energy, like a bolt of lightning striking the ground and leaving behind the lingering aftereffects; it crawled into her skin, her head, and she picked up speed, running headlong through the village as others stopped their daily chores and turned to watch.

She passed the row of statues, and the people they were meant to represent, feeling it was less than respectful to be tearing past them mindlessly, so she mentally offered an apology. She swept past the last of the slope-roofed houses and hurtled down the rocky mountainside, nearly tripping herself in her haste, her ears easily picking up the sounds of low-voiced warnings and...

...one voice in particular...angry, gruff, threatening...

They came into view, Koron appearing poised and tense as he and several of the other villagers watched the stranger that had just infiltrated their home. This youkai. It has happened before, and so they are expecting to be attacked and they will try to...but not this one, please...

The thoughts jumbled through her head, finally voicing themselves from her lips as she caught sight of him. He was as imperious-looking as the night she had met him, armor-clad once more, cold and calculating; Kanaye had one hand wrapped around the neck of one of the village men and was speaking into his face, short, quick words that suggested exasperation and an easy temper.

"Kanaye!"

And a half dozen heads swiveled in her direction at that, most surprised, one possessed by a knowing smirk.

"Please...let him go," she requested breathlessly, coming to a halt in the midst of the tense villagers. But these were the small core of youki-manipulators that protected this place from the demon infestation that seized Japan. She had not been able to kill Kanaye on her own, but she was certain the group as a whole could...and would...manage it if she did not put a halt to the confrontation.

Kanaye's eyes slid from her to the face in his grasp, as though waiting for something. Zadi felt the sudden rise in energy, watched Kanaye's eyes narrow evilly at the intrusive feeling, and, heart pounding in a restrained panic, she turned a pointed finger toward Koron. "Stop it!"

"Zadi...we can't let him go. He's dangerous. Do you feel that?" Koron hissed, appearing tense at being held back by his leader, eyes focused on the face of the man in Kanaye's grasp.

"She's felt more than that," Kanaye wickedly assured him.

Zadi prayed those around her missed the true vulgarity of that statement. "Please let him go, Kanaye. This was a misunderstanding."

Looking as though he was mulling over the request, Kanaye reprimanded the unfortunate individual in a soft, malicious voice, "You should learn to ask so politely." He then disengaged the long-fingered grip from around his near-victim's throat and the man hit the dirt. Kanaye glanced back up at Zadi with an understated, "Hey."

"Zadi?" Koron questioned, watching her with a mixture of curiosity and unease as the tension began to abate. "Do you know him? I had assumed he was one of Eizan's---"

"Be grateful I'm in a good mood, woman," Kanaye hissed at him, and instantly Koron turned an ireful look in his direction.

"I'm not a woman---"

"Could have fooled me. It must be the high alititude in this godsforsaken place that's to blame for all these delicate-looking men."

Zadi exhaled a sigh of resignation. She was happy to see him, ecstatic, really, but this was only going to end badly if it continued, and so she went to work trying to repair it. "Yes, I know him," she spoke up, "and he's not one of Eizan's people. He was one of those responsible for destroying him, so that is not at issue, however...," and she turned a stern look on Kanaye, "it is not acceptable to step into someone's home and insult them."

"Are you lecturing me?" Kanaye asked in awe, and a wide grin crossed his face, though she had a hard time judging whether it was genuine or expressed amusement at her audacity.

"I can handle this. It's not a problem," Zadi offered in apology to the village guards, but with some cajoling and promises she managed to get them to leave, and the silence that remained behind was gratifyingly sound. The muted heat from the early autumn sun shone down on top of her head as she turned to eye Kanaye. "What are you doing here?"

He cocked his head at her, so quizzically that for a moment he did indeed remind her of a dog. But there was something blaringly different about him. He appeared, despite the circumstances of his arrival, to be quite relaxed, more so than she could ever recall seeing him, and she wondered if this was because of the lack of a conflict. Is this how he normally is...? Likely not, judging from the openly-voiced exasperation of those who knew him best...

"You likely do not remember, as you were practically comatose at the time, but I told you that I would expect you to replace the two swords you shattered. I am here to collect them."

She could admit to feeling some disappointment in hearing the reason for his visit; some irrational part of her had latched on this easy mood of his and his sudden appearance and had been waiting to hear, "Why? Because I missed you, stupid." She smiled wryly at her own ridiculous expectations and replied, "You're right. I don't remember you saying that. But...we are not terribly adept weapons-makers. We make things that we use to hunt, mostly. I don't think whatever we make will meet your---"

"Are you trying to shirk your responsibility?"

"Shirk?" she repeated, wide-eyed. "N-no...I..."

"Your skin is darker," he commented randomly, looking outward into the rocky, rugged landscape before glancing back at her.

What an odd thing to say... "Pardon?"

"That means you've spent a good amount of time outside recently, and with it being as hell-damned hot as it was this summer, somehow I doubt it was for leisure purposes."

Ah, I see. What a strange man you are. She shrugged lightly. "We've had a few problems that I've tried to help with. It's required me to be outside more often. It's nothing to worry about."

"Who's worried?" he challenged coolly, eyebrows upraised as he turned to face her fully. "And your people can replace the armor while I'm here, too."

"Armor?" she repeated incredulously, and he was amused at the look of sheer alarm that captured her face as she stared at him. "But you're wearing armor."

"It's always good to have spares on hand. I go through plenty of it."

"Kanaye, you don't understand," she interjected, feeling as though she was having to explain to a toddler why it was necessary not to go too near the cooking fires. "Nothing that is made here will stand up to the kinds of people you normally fight."

"Let me worry about that."

Zadi released a sigh at his flippant unconcern. "I don't know why you really came, but...it is good to see you again," she said sincerely.

"That is why I came," he surprised her by admitting. "I knew you would say that."



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She was at a complete loss as to what to do with him. She had taken Kanaye to see old Viedi, their swordsmith, and she had been shocked that the ancient man had reacted with very little surprise, listening to Zadi's explanation as to why she owed Kanaye replacement weapons, his wrinkled brow rising and lowering periodically, as though attempting to glean the entire truth out of the words. He had questioned Kanaye about precisely what he wanted, warned in the same way Zadi had that the weapons he made were used in self-defense and for hunting; they were not meant for an embattled youkai. And Zadi had taken a few steps back, watching the strange scene that was a regal, overbearingly tall youkai towering over a wizened old man, frowning with the difficulty of trying to understand badly-accented Japanese. She was surprised that Kanaye made no snide remarks about Viedi's home, his questionable skill as a human, his poor grasp of the native language of this country, nothing; simply stated what he wanted and turned to leave, ducking out from under the low-slung door. And Zadi, offering her thanks to Viedi, followed him.

It felt strange. He was eerily subdued...no, not subdued, exactly; there was no melancholy in this. Calm, self-possessed, even-tempered. It was beginning to make her worried. It was as though, in her absence, someone had extracted his vindictive side; either that, or he was comfortable enough with her to show that another side existed. There has to be some reason why Lien stayed with him as long as she did...there had to be something else, and I guess this is it.

But now that the business of his swords' replacements were being taken care of, Zadi was unsure of what to do with him. He did not fit into this place. He was gaining stares, some subtle, some not so much, but he appeared to ignore it all.

"This place is...," he finally spoke up, murmuring the words as though they were coming to him as he spoke, "quiet," he finally pronounced, and glanced at her.

"Is that a problem?"

"No," he instantly answered. "I enjoy quiet. Too bad it's full of these filthy creatures."

Ah, there's the Kanaye I know.

"Kanaye..."

"Hmm?"

"While you're here...you'll behave, won't you? You won't hurt anyone? I know how your temper is and my people are not accustomed to having a demon walking amongst them---"

"I'd never have guessed," he commented wryly, returning one of the stares he was being given by a surprised, passing villager.

"---and I hope you won't hold it against them. As glad as I am to see you, my job is to protect them from beings like you. I'd...," she paused, then went on, "I'd rather you leave and come back for the weapons if you feel like you won't be able to control your behavior."

"You think I can't control myself?" he questioned curiously, a faint sneer crossing his features. "I can be appallingly well-mannered," he claimed.

"I think that would frighten me," she murmured honestly.

He paused in his steps, looking around for a moment before turning to her with one upraised finger, as though a display of such a rarity was on its way. And before she could stop him, he had turned on his heel and stalked straight toward an old woman that was working to cut apart the carcass of a pig in preparation for dinner. The ancient woman looked up at his approach, mouth falling open in amazement as he said something to her, too low for Zadi to hear, and with a few quick sweeps of his claws, the pig was gutted and separated neatly into parts. He then returned, fastidiously flicking blood and gore from his fingers, eyebrows raised in expectation, as though anticipating Zadi's praises.

"Eh?"

"I...I think you terrified her," Zadi said quietly, and he glanced over his shoulder to find the old woman running stiffly back into her house, the door slamming shut behind her with a very final thud.

"You're welcome, you ungrateful old hag!" he shouted in a voice that carried throughout the entire center of the small village, bringing people's heads up from their work, prompting others to murmur to each other in quiet concern.

Zadi heaved another sigh. She was in for a long day.



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And long did not even begin to describe it. He followed her...everywhere. It truly was like having a faithful dog at her side, and the looks she was being given from her fellow villagers told her that the moment her large, omnipresent shadow left, she would be inundated with all the questions that were being sealed behind surprised stares and vague smiles.

Appearing eternally bored, Kanaye trailed behind her while she gathered her medicinal supplies and went to check on some of the ailing villagers. She was no physician, certainly, but she was talented with herbs and growing things, just as her father had been, and she was able to ease pain that went beyond their young doctor's skills. And through it all, as she applied ointments or delivered medicines, he lurked behind her, waiting outside the individual huts as she did her work, arms crossed and mind idle.

"It must be exhausting, having to give a damn about this many people," he exhaled in a voice that did indeed sound weary of it all as she exited another house. The sun was beginning to set as he fell into step beside her, and they trailed back through the strange little town.

It was so foreign, even more so than she was, he decided; full of humans who looked very different, and spoke in a language he could not understand, one of the few he had ever heard that he did not know fluently from his many years of wandering. Everything was different, from the tools they used to the things they attempted to grow in this harsh environment to the way their buildings were constructed. It was as though some hand had grasped onto a village from another world and transplanted it here.

"Are you hungry?" she asked him suddenly, stopping in front of a building that was longer than any of the others on that road, possessing a thatched roof and a hanging sign that was written in that same language he could not interpret.

She turned on him, hair flying in an ebony wave as her face lit on his with an expression that he would have termed as painfully cute, bright-eyed, smiling, hopeful...happy. His attention fell from those glittering eyes, trailing to the lips that were moving with words he could not be bothered to hear. They were perfect, he realized, and he stepped closer to inspect them, clenching his fingers in an attempt to quell the sudden desire to touch them. And then recollections of that night came back to him, and he was suddenly very intent on having this woman to himself for a while, but she had other plans, apparently, because suddenly his hand was grasped and she worked to tug him inside the low-slung building.

The decor was quite unimpressive, he decided. It was dark with only the vaguest of orange light from outside filtering through the strange, covered windows. Several niches held burning oil lamps that cast an eerie pall over the room. Two cold, stone fireplaces rested at either end of the building, uneccessary this time of year. There were tables, and benches, and people inhabiting those things, speaking to each other in a low hum, that unknown language spewing from their mouths in a stream of incomprehensible gibberish. The place smelled of overcooked vegetables and undercooked meat and something else he could not name. His eyes fell back on the woman who was leading him, and she looked so content and at home that he forgot to voice a complaint.

A very wide man dressed in something disgusting and stained called a welcome to her as she entered, hand rising in greeting as he deposited two mugs of some odd-smelling substance on one of the worn wooden tables.

"Zadi," another voice called, this one lower and more familiar, and Kanaye recognized it as he watched her head turn. She released his hand and he followed her to one table that was inhabited by the yellow-haired man from earlier in the day. Koron, was it? his mind carelessly questioned...as well as a few other men and women he did not know...or care to know for that matter. He was only annoyed that they had summoned her attention from him.

The others at the table seemed about as happy to see him there as Kanaye was to be near them. He pondered which of his instincts to follow...to leave the place before he started breaking necks (these people smell terrible) or remain with her, because there was something about that pale-haired guy that made him want to... He glanced at Zadi as she sat, and instantly joined her, easily-summoned defiance coming to his face as he did so.

There was an uneasy chatter for a few moments as the others at the table tried to stare at him without being obvious about it, and finally it was Koron who settled a light-eyed gaze on him. Kanaye instantly took it as a challenge.

"What?" he snapped. He was developing a serious dislike for this guy and could not name why. Ah, but do I need a reason?

"You are Kanaye, correct?" Koron questioned, eyes trailing from him to Zadi. As soon as they lit on the woman an easy smile began tugging at his mouth, and Kanaye experienced a sudden inane desire to destroy the man's face. Koron turned back to watch Kanaye once more, inquiring politely, "What is it that you do exactly?"

"I kill people," Kanaye answered easily, a venomous smile finding its way to his own lips as he managed to completely halt the conversation at the table. "People that I do not like. People that perturb me. I am not required to do anything else because I am the spoiled, pointless youngest son of a deceased youkai lord."

"Pointless?" Zadi questioned, head turning at the strangeness of that.

"You only need one," Kanaye casually supplied. "I was a spare."

And at these revelations, the discomfort at the table rose considerably, a heavy silence encapsulating everything. Kanaye reveled in it with wicked glee, but the moment was broken when the owner of the establishment arrived, bringing bowls of some admittedly hunger-inciting stew and mugs of something that prompted Kanaye to sniff at them with barely-disguised mistrust. The conversation picked up between Zadi and Koron once more, and Kanaye leveled the man with a stare of pure malice, one that he appeared to pick up on because those pale eyes swerved toward the demon again.

"Zadi," Koron began, "you never did say. How exactly did you meet him?"

Zadi released her eating utensil, looking hesitant, as though she was trying to think of the best way to explain, but Kanaye handled it for her.

"She tried to kill me. That amused me and so I allowed her to live."

Koron blinked. "Then are you friends or...?"

"She says so," Kanaye answered in a non-commital tone, suddenly feeling the need to put this man in his place. "But you want her, don't you?" he asked, the words slicing through the air with cool precision, prompting the others at the stable to stop eating and stare yet again.

Koron frowned, caught completely off guard.

"I don't blame you," Kanaye went on, sounding almost as though he was commiserating. "She's a goddamned siren. But I'll warn you...she's already had me. I doubt she'd be interested in stepping several rungs down the ladder, so to speak. I am good at everything I do."

And then there were the sounds of Zadi violently choking as she inhaled what she had been drinking. She watched as everything went silent around them once more, drowned in it, and her life flashed before her eyes, certain that this was the feeling of her soul trying to escape her body. She felt frozen, her mouth and body not responding to the open mortification that was spewing from Kanaye's mouth.

"Don't let that innocent look fool you. If you just encourage her, she's quite the assertive---"

"Kanaye!!!" she finally choked out, horrified, fingers digging into the scarred table as though to keep herself from falling off the bench.

"What?" he asked blandly, as though not comprehending why she was so distressed. "You're wanting to get married and grow old, right? Why not with this girly bastard? I doubt he's more than passably adequate, but you've got to make concessions if---"

And then the smug, gratifying feel of her hands clutching onto his shoulders as she did her best to haul him bodily from the bench. He gave in to her desperation, rising from his seat and giving a last half-hearted attempt at the manners he had promised her, calling smarmy good-byes to all as the woman continued to drag him toward the exit.

Once they were outside, she released him, breathing heavily as though from exertion. Her hands moved to cover her face, either from sheer embarrassment or a desire to cry, and in his mind's eye he could recall the look of stunned amazement on Koron's face. He regretted nothing.

"What...," she began, still sounding breathless, and he could hear her heart thumping manically inside her chest. Her hands lowered and blue eyes, dark and enraged, stabbed at him with an intensity that did more to interest him than intimidate. "What possessed you to---" And it was as though words stopped working for her, because she could not finish, could not summon the ones necesssary to accurately relay what was storming through her mind.

There was a silence, pervasive and complete, like a graveyard. And that was when she exploded.

"What is wrong with you?! Oh, my gods, Kanaye! Could you not hear yourself? You all but told them I'm some kind of...You told them that I---" And then she seemed to fall into some chilling calm, offered her next statement in a tone that suggested she would gladly have flung herself from a bridge if one would just conveniently present itself. "I have to live with these people once you are gone!"

He loved when she was angry, fed off of it. Just like she feeds off of mine, the little leech. And as she continued to rant at him in the middle of the road, he allowed himself to do what he had wanted to earlier, fingers reaching outward to touch that face, furious, sinfully beautiful; no human has a right to look like this.

She stopped speaking as his index finger trailed over her lips, touching them with a childish curiosity, a need to explore, and, still angry, she caught his hand, halting his progress.

"Be angry all you like," he invited, turning on one of those warm, sincere smiles that liquified her insides. "But everything I said in there was the truth. I take none of it back. If the fact is that you are only that way with me, then that is something for you to consider, little shrew."



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She was exhausted. It was as though the entire day was settled solidly between her shoulders, but Zadi was determined to finish, and she recorded the ingredients of her newest concoction in the leather-bound book, taking comfort in the familiarity of her small home. Periodically her eyes would turn toward the ceiling, aware of the demon that was lingering on her roof after she had forbade him from entering her house with her.

Night was in full effect, the hours late and sleepy. With the separation of several hours, she could look back on her thorough humiliaton from earlier in the evening without that fury coming with it. She could not understand why he had done it. To make her angry? She knew he loved to do that. To embarrass Koron? Possibly. But it had been challenging, his tone of voice, his very manner, and she considered the fact that this demon...this canine...

It was as though he was...

Marking territory?

Eyes traveling to the ceiling once more, she sighed and closed the book in her lap. She rose to her feet, replacing the jars and small pots of herbs and other materials, carefully returning them to their spaces. Stepping outside, her warm face reveling in the night air that brushed over her skin, she found that it was so much cooler now that the heat of that long summer was fading.

Even after all of that...she still wanted to see him, to be with him. She wanted to touch him. She wanted to speak with him. She wanted to commit all of this to memory, this short time that he would be here. And so she moved around to the side of her house, positioning her foot in one of the many crevices between the timber that formed one of the walls, pulling herself upward until she was able to drag her body on top of the roof. It reminded her of that early morning, many weeks earlier, when she had sought him out to say good-bye...

And here he is, she thought, staring in open appreciation at the youkai that was sprawled out on the sloping roof, long legs bent so as not to hang off the side, arms folded under his head. She clambered across the roof until she was next to him, feeling uneasy at the creaking sound it made, but he did not look at her as he spoke.

"I will not apologize."

"I'm not surprised. I never expected one," she replied evenly, turning to look out at the majestic view of the surrounding mountain peaks, the bright specks that were stars hanging overhead, framing a crescent-shaped moon. She exhaled a steadying breath, feeling the stress of the day recede. "Kanaye," she whispered, and it was that tone that made his nerve-endings take note, "why are you here?"

"I have no idea," he answered honestly, still staring upward at the night sky.

"I think you missed me."

"I think you're insane," he responded airily. "But someone that looks like you do can get away with it." His head finally turned then, shadowed face lighting on her with an expression that made her insides shake.

She looked away from him, strangled by her nerves, and the words left her mouth before she even considered what she was saying. "You really know very little about me, Kanaye."

"I know all I need to know, Iszadia."

Her mouth hung open in alarm, feeling suddenly exposed. "Who have you been speaking to?"

"What are you babbling? They've been speaking to me. I can't get them to shut up about you. It's like meeting an endless stream of parents, all gloating over your questionable perfection," he complained in a tone that was long-suffering, beaten.

"I see..."

"And I know that you were born in a large western city, a far western one. Your father was a doctor. Your mother died at your birth. You were sent to some bizarre temple when you were a kid and that's where you learned all this crazy shit you do. I know you've delivered at least half the brats in this village. The people here wear me out."

"Frightening," she murmured with wide-eyed amazement.

"Like I said, I couldn't get them to stop talking. The level of adoration for you around here is absolutely nauseating."

She smiled faintly at that. "I don't know nearly as much about you. You have me at a disadvantage."

"You know what you need to know about me."

"Kanaye..."

He exhaled a worn breath, blinked up at the night sky as though assembling enough facts to please her. "I am the second youngest of six. I am nearly seven hundred and fifty years old. My older sisters tortured me with the nickname 'Yaye-kun'. They are dead now...because my father was an idiot, my brother was gone, and I was inept. As you bring people into this world, I remove them. I have destroyed more human villages than I can care to count; the men, the women, the children, down to the goddamned chickens. The demon count is easily just as high, if not higher. It is you who does not know me, Zadi, and perhaps these were things you should have known before; they might have been enough to alter your feelings."

"I think you are probably being too hard on yourself with some of that."

"Hard on myself? I'm stating facts, not expressing remorse," he countered with a frown, before muttering, "And you would forgive me for anything...not that I need it. You're so simple-minded. It's quite sad."

"It's not my place to forgive you for those things," she murmured, taking the moment to voice a question about something that had been lingering in her mind for the past several months. "Did you...did you see Lien?"

"Yes."

"And?" she prompted, and it was this feeling of vulnerability that she hated.

"I told her that I replaced her with a human woman who is twice as infuriating and half as self-righteous."

"You didn't," she whispered, a mixture of thrilled and appalled.

"No, you're right, I didn't," he admitted with sly amusement, blinking in some surprise as that angelic face suddenly appeared within his field of vision, blocking out the view of the lit heavens with something even more welcome. He did nothing, merely watched in rampant fascination as her face descended, eyes closing, lips meeting his, igniting that familiar, sleep-haunting desire to consume her. Thoroughly disgusted with himself, Kanaye's mouth moved against hers with languid enjoyment. He heard the sigh she exhaled, and his arms enfolded her, tugging at her until she was sprawled on top of him, a slight, welcome weight, and he was suddenly frustrated beyond words about the armor that separated them.

Her fingers worked into his hair and, armor be damned, he began tugging at the short, sleeveless summery thing she was wearing...and that was when the interruption came. He had to rein in the impulse to destroy the meddling creature.

"Zadi?" came that hated voice out of the darkness below.

Kanaye watched dispassionately as the woman behaved as though she had just been scalded, lunging off of him with so sudden a movement that she would have pitched herself off the roof entirely if not for a well-timed hand fisting onto a handful of her clothing.

Trying to retain some of her dignity, Zadi returned to the ground, and Kanaye listened as she and Koron discussed some sort of activity that was supposed to take place at dawn. He gave her the details of the place and time, and annoyingly agreeable as always, she assured him she would be there. There were the sounds of the much-detested human man's departure, and then those of the woman returning to the confines of her tiny home.

Restless now and aggravated for having been interrupted, Kanaye leapt down from the roof, ducking inside to find Zadi aimlessly stacking several books, appearing distracted, and he simply stared at her, seized by that familiar feeling of disgust and coveting want.

"Is there anything you'll need tonight, Kanaye?" she asked him then, offering him a smile.

He lifted his head from inspecting a row of strange containers set on a low table, absently wondering if he could take that as an invitation. "No. Are you trying to get rid of me?"

"I have to go to sleep," Zadi answered apologetically. "I have to get up early. We've had a problem with an aggressive pack of boars becoming territorial. It wasn't such a problem until recently. They've begun attacking the children while at play, and so something has to be done."

"Boars?" he repeated, tone dripping with scorn. "How disappointing. Your life is certainly less exciting here, isn't it?"

"Good night, Kanaye," she prompted with an enigmatic smile, and he watched her as she snuffed out the lamps inside the small dwelling and moved to what served as her bed.

He blinked in the darkness, sight not particularly hindered, eyeing her as she settled in, wrapped a blanket around herself, and within minutes her breathing changed, became slower. He glanced toward the door...actually, there was no door, just a heavy sheet of material. How insane must she be to have a curtain separating her from the outside world? Overly-trusting, isn't she? She assumes that all the people around her are as good-natured as she is.

He waited for a while, perched on one of the trunks in the corner, listening to the sounds of a village falling to sleep. The hum of voices grew lower and lower, until it was nonexistent. Illumination was provided only by moonlight and the scant remaining torches situated throughout the landscape, their faint glow meeting the corner of his eye. And why should she go? She is no hunter. Is it because she is in charge? Are they too incompetent to form up and take care of something on their own?

His eyes roved once more to that senseless feminine form, feeling that familiar desire to... He needed a distraction, he decided, shaking his head and averting his eyes once more. And that was when he came to his decision.


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She woke to screams, or what she thought were screams. They pierced her ears, pulled her back to wakefulness, and Zadi opened her eyes, blinking amidst the pile of soft pillows and blankets, her brain working to place the sounds even as she stood up. Yes, there were cries, but she could not tell if they were of alarm or...

Stumbling from her bed, she folded her arms together against the early morning chill, wandering outside into the grey of early day, and turning to look on as a growing group of chattery villagers assembled, talking animatedly. But her eyes went past them to fixate on Kanaye who was walking toward her with a stride that was very casual and calm, as though unsure of the cause behind the ruckus, but she noticed his arms...the sleeves were blood-soaked, the hands were filthy...

"Oh, my...," she began, feeling herself take a step backward until she was braced by the wall of her home. Pure terror clenched onto her insides as she watched him approach, face cold and satisfied. "Kanaye, what have you done?" she breathed, mind already conjuring an endless stream of atrocities.

"I killed them, idiot, what do you think?" he sneered.

"You...," she found she could not even finish it. Her heart pounded with silent dread, and the weight of responsibility suddenly crushed her. She'd allowed him to stay, and...but her glazed eyes were diverted when Koron descended upon Kanaye with a wide grin, hand coming up to clap the demon on one shoulder.

"You, my friend, are amazing. That was quite a show, and you were very kind to see to it for us."

Huh? Zadi blinked in surprise at that and watched as Kanaye's liquid amber eyes slitted and slipped toward the hand hanging on his shoulder, clearly contemplating violence. "Don't...touch...me," he warned in a slow, deadly voice, and Koron removed the hand as Kanaye continued walking toward Zadi.

"Go back to bed," Kanaye told her, inspecting his gory hands with vague interest. "You no longer have a boar problem."


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Kanaye's prompt and thorough removal of the boar threat set the town into a happy mood from the moment people woke to hear the news. The villagers made more of an attempt to be friendly with him, which only served to make him irritable and uncomfortable. The smiles had become more genuine. The waves were not half-hearted. He was having to create some form of white noise inside his own head in order to avoid it, a new mantra. Manners, control...he had sworn to her...

"These filthy little insects think I did it for them," he muttered with open contempt as he'd haunted Zadi's attempt to chink up some of the holes in the old walls of her home, preparations for a looming winter.

"Why did you do it?" she questioned, pausing for a moment in applying the sticky material, still not having come up with a viable reason on her own.

"Boredom," he instantly responded, and then his eyes turned to her with a veiled smirk. "And because I don't share very well."

She had stared at him upon that revelation, but before she could get clarification, one of the villagers had come running up to tell them that a celebratory feast was being planned for the evening, since there was now an ample and ready supply of meat. With an awkward smile, Zadi asked Kanaye if he would come, but he refused to commit and so she continued with her regular day, not certain whether she wanted him there or not. It certainly had its risks...

This time he did not follow her through her daily chores and visits, and she felt a strange relief mixed with concern over that. If he was not with her, she wasn't able to watch him. She spent the morning and afternoon meeting with people over various things, all the while answering their sly questions about the strange visitor that lingered near her home.

When night began to fall once more, the sky glazing into orange-pink, the village began stirring with the final preparations of the celebration. She walked home, passing all manner of delicious smells, feeling buoyant and light-hearted. For the moment, her world was complete, and it felt good. The mood stayed with her as she returned to her home to find him there and waiting, as though having retreated from the eyes and mouths of the villagers. She gave him a bright smile, her heart thumping in happy recognition.

"You'll come tonight?" she questioned as she moved past him, as always, highly aware of that warm thrum of energy that emanated from him.

"Will you be there?" he asked in return.

"Of course."

"I'll stay there as long as I can stand it," he muttered unhappily.

She gathered her things, informed him that she would be going to take a bath, and he said nothing, though she caught his eyes roving, following her every movement until she left her home. And when she returned, clean once more, she found him just as as she had left him, waiting impatiently.

"If you'll leave, I can get dressed," she prompted him.

"I think I'll stay."

"Kanaye, don't be---"

"It's impolite to throw a guest out of your home. You'll just have to make do, won't you?"

"Perverted dog," she grumbled, digging through a trunk until she extracted something, a garment that was formed from light materials, the hem and sleeves decorated with intricate stitching, and she turned her back to him, feeling interested eyes boring into her as she disrobed and then quickly pulled the dress over her head, arms shoving through the sleeves, still-damp hair arranged to fall down her back. Wordlessly, she quickly tied her hair up, knotting it with expert fingers. She bent to reach for a short row of jars that rested on a tray, then moved toward him.

"What...are you doing?" he asked as she settled directly in front of him, bare feet tucked primly underneath her and wearing a secretive smile, one that looked on the fit of bursting into laughter as she emptied the containers onto what looked to serve as a palette. Each jar expelled a different colored powdery substance which she quickly mixed with some sort of liquid. She dangled her fingers across the palette...hovering, delicately swept them across a deep blue color and then, eyeing him michievously, began reaching toward his face. Recognizing her intent, he grasped her wrist.

"Have you gone mad?"

"It's ceremonial. We all do this. You're a guest, so I will do it for you," she offered.

"Like hell you will. Douse yourself in that shit all you like, but I am fine as I am."

"Onegai, Kanaye-sama!" she pleaded with a grin and he sneered at her.

"You should stop trying to speak Japanese, you know. You've been butchering my language for months."

She stopped at that, looking faintly worried. "Have I really? I don't use it as much as I like."

"You know the words, but the accent is ridiculous," he claimed with a shake of his head, as though she was doing it to be purposefully disrespectful.

Her eyebrows rose at that and she nodded. Very fluidly, she slipped back into her own language and he frowned as she began whispering words to him, still seeming playful, but they caught his attention and he said nothing as her fingers began stroking out a character on the left side of his face, just below the eye. It was all gibberish to him, but he kept his eyes focused on her lips and only recognized one word that would come out occasionally...his own name. And Kanaye was suddenly certain he was about to eat this woman alive.

He diverted his attention, eyes flickering around the room with aimless abandon. She was a witch. There was no other explanation. He found himself saying nothing as she switched colors, and then moved to the other side of his face. Bent forward, face inches from his own, fingers running across his skin...

"You have about a minute more of that before this takes a very sudden and energetic change," he muttered.

"Am I bothering you?"

"More than I can say. I can show you, if you like." He paused, appearing faintly suspicious. "What are you painting?"

She said nothing, but finally drew back, still grinning out of that perfect face. She then reached for a mirror and held it in front of his face. He glared back at his reflection.

"What the hell does all that mean?"

She reached out and brushed an additional color across the right side, as though placing the final touches on a masterpiece, eyeing him with great affection. "This is our old symbol for warrior." Then the left. "This means dog. Rabid dog, actually. It's more a warning, than a word. And the blue color is usually associated with insanity," she offered innocently.

"Insane rabid dog warrior?" he muttered, eyes narrowing. "You're enjoying yourself, aren't you?"

She grinned at him, but made no comment as she moved across the room to settle in front of a mirror, old and worn-looking, its edges losing whatever decorative covering they had in great flakes. Kanaye sat still, eyeing her as her hands moved through her hair with rapid fingers, combing, separating, applying some sort of liquid that smelled good...and then she began rummaging for all sorts of decorative odds and ends, just the same as all the other freakish people in this village wore, even the men, shiny bead-like objects that were applied to the hair. These people were nothing short of bizarre, he decided, one hand lifting of its own accord toward his face, as though to wipe the carefully applied symbols from his skin. And he was stopped...caught staring stupidly at his hand, debating whether or not to do it. He didn't enjoy the prospect of looking like an idiot, but there was something about this insane woman that occasionally made him want to please her in some way. Revolting, you old dog.

The hand lowered back into his lap, clenched, as though to keep it from ruining her work and he looked up to find her finished, expertly applying a few last strokes to her own face, and when she turned back to him, he blinked, not entirely certain he recognized her. Her hair was caught and pulled away from her face, spiraling down her back in a dark, glossy wave, small gems threaded through here and there, gold, auburn, deep red; her face bore delicate strokes of that same paint-like substance she had applied to him, more gold and deep red, like smeared blood and sunshine, and his brain laughed at him as it considered the fact that such a comparison sounded like himself and her...

"You've got to go through all this trouble just to eat a damned dinner?" he asked gruffly, trying to drag his mind back. "No wonder you're so little...you'll starve in this hole."

And suddenly she was beside him again, kneeling just behind his left shoulder, pulling at his hair. You bitch, you think I'll let you...but he did let her, and it was mostly because he was so caught by that smell...like her, like she always smelled, but magnified, as though there were several of her in the room. That mixture of something flowery and subtle enough not to offend his sense of smell. Quite the contrary, in fact. If not for his rigid self-control he likely would have set upon the woman then and there. This was nearly blissful. He closed his eyes and repeatedly inhaled her, reveling in that feel of expert fingers plying through his hair, adding those ridiculous baubles, and he could not have cared less that he had suddenly become her overgrown, homicidal toy.

And then she pulled back and the spell was broken. He opened his eyes to find her smiling at him with sly purpose, tugging and maneuvering at him until he could see his reflection once more...and Kanaye was certain he had never looked more foolish. He closed his eyes at the sight, physically feeling dignity flee him. Wordlessly, he grasped onto the section of decorated hair she had so carefully created and, with one slicing motion, detached it from his head. She watched, open-mouthed as he did so, then looked down as he took her hand and placed the beaded segment of hair into her open palm.

"Kanaye! I could have just taken them back out if you hated them so much," she berated. "But it's not feminine here, and---"

"You liked it. And now you can keep it without me having to wander around with it. It'll grow back. Where's the problem?"

She seemed to think about that for a moment, then placed the handful of silvery hair on a low table and shook her head, faint smile returning. He glanced down at his hand as she grasped it and began pulling him after her, out into the blanketing darkness. The village was seized by the low thrum of happy activity, torches lit and burning, people trailing toward the center of the town where the flickering expulsion of embers into the air beckoned; a massive bonfire was in place and there was a heavy smell of smoking meat and baked things and many, many people. Too many people, too many humans, all gathered into one place; each individual scent gathered together, intermixed, until every step toward it was like a smack in the face, and he felt his expression furrow in annoyance as his sense of smell was attacked by these...disgustingly happy creatures and their quaint little party.

When they arrived, he quickly pulled his hand free of hers, having forgotten that it had been clasped at all. The sounds of some flute and stringed instrument melded together to form a musical background to the night, and then suddenly, they were set upon, people all over him, around him, nearly touching him, speaking to him and her, smiling and laughing and...filthy bastards, quit being so... It felt like being trapped, walled in, and his first instinct was to remove them all from his immediate sphere of existence, but he had promised her...manners, manners...goddamn you, Kanaye, why did you say you had them at all? And so, he took the only available option...he fled.

Zadi looked up in surprise as the demon that had been standing beside her suddenly evaporated, moved with so swift a motion she could not follow it. She paused in her conversations, turning around in a full circle, searching. The crowds were absent of him; he would be quite easy to spot even amongst this many people, but there was no sign of him and so her eyes moved to the rooftops of the buildings around the village square until she found him, perched atop one of the two-story shops, a large shadow leering back at her, and she realized that, really, it had been too much to ask of him. From being an exterminator of humans to being expected to interact civilly with them at a gathering. Zadi was only grateful that he had removed himself instead of them.

She felt guilty at leaving him to brood up there on the rooftop, but she had her own responsibilities as well. She was quickly sucked into it all, pulled into the ceremonial aspects, performing her role, and all the while hyper aware of that pair of golden eyes leveled on her from a distance in the dark. She ate until she felt nearly ill, she sang old songs with the children, songs she had taught them from her own childhood. She whirled from one conversation to the next, she joined in on the dancing, and all the while, as happy as she was to be here with them, what she wanted most of all was to be on that rooftop with him, separated, watching it all...not because she didn't enjoy being with her people, but because she wanted so much to be with him.

And finally, in the late morning hours when she had nearly exhausted herself, she left the others to continue reveling without her in the impromptu celebration. She said her good-byes, eyes sweeping back up to the roof only to find it empty, abandoned. She left it all behind, the flickering warmth of the massive fire casting shadows from behind her as she walked back toward her home. Full and tired and content...her feet pulled her home, hoping they were pulling her back to him, down the well-trodden road, past these other houses that were so familiar, always the same, unchanging, even after all of these years. She could remember the people that had built them, had first lived within them, and had seen each successive generation...the children, the grandchildren, the great-grandchildren; all born and then gone and replaced by the next. She had seen it all, had helped build it all, and the only things that had remained unchanged from that time a century earlier were herself and Koron and a few others. Blessed or cursed, she could not decide which it was.

That contentment was replaced by something else, a menagerie of happiness and melancholy, until she could not decide what to call her mood, but she reached her tiny house, saw that the light had been snuffed out and darkness was waiting to welcome her home. Where did he go? she wondered uneasily as she slipped inside, but as soon as she did, she felt it, that familiar youki, like a warm current sliding across her skin. She could not see him in the darkness, but it did not matter. She would know him anywhere.

"I don't know what I was expecting when I asked you to come," she said softly, apologetically into the blackness as she moved across the room by memory, long years of having everything exactly the same. "I am sorry. I should have known better."

"You have no control over me. I decided to come, just as I decided to leave."

That disembodied voice. She listened to the words as she knelt in front of her mirror, only the very faintest reflection of moonlight from the window casting enough light for her to begin removing the ornaments from her hair, sliding them free, loosening the long strands until it all fell free, and she luxuriated in the feel of combing it out.

"You will waste your life with them."

She blinked, the motion of brushing through her hair slowing to a stop. That voice...low, dangerous, feral, silky, it made her shivery, either from fear or excitement, depending on the tone.

"You are wasting your life hating them," she murmured in return, reaching for the pitcher of water. She wet a cloth and began working to remove the markings from her face, the colors unrecognizeable in the dark as they mixed and turned the water a dull, inky gray.

"I resent you for being one," he growled bitterly. "I detest you for it."

She exhaled a sigh, finding that those words didn't hurt nearly as much as they once had. She had come to understand something about Kanaye; depth of feeling, in whatever manner it came, meant something. Hatred, affection, it was all nearly the same, came from the same place within him. She was certain he did not recognize the difference.

"One thing I have learned from you, Kanaye," she went on, moving to find new clothing to change into, "is that it is entirely possible to love someone even while you despise them for other things. I hate what you do, what you find acceptable. I have heard things, from you and others, and so much of what I know is reprehensible. But I have come to love you very much, whether you accept that or not. And I am not Lien. Those feelings will not change. They belong to you, they are unconditional, no matter what, whatever you do with them, because I already know what you are and what you're capable of. I expect nothing from you. And, youkai or not, everyone needs someone like that; someone who can see them for how truly ugly they are and not look away, still view them with feelings that remain constant." Her head turned and she found him in the darkness, that lurking shadow. "I am constant, I promise."

Silence. This time she did not ask him to leave; it did not matter. She fumbled a bit in the dark until she was able to remove the dress, pulling it over her head, folding it carefully and placing it on top of the trunk, and then she reached for the old kimono she preferred to sleep in. She slipped her arms through the sleeves, tied it loosely, then turned to stare at him once more, wondering what was going through his mind. She could just make him out now that her eyes had adjusted to the dark and, prompted by those feelings that wanted to display themselves, she closed the distance between them, eyeing the form that stared dispassionately back at her, appearing faintly sullen, as though displeased with her or with himself or perhaps both.

Wordlessly, she drew closer, extended her arms around him, clasping them around the shoulders of this stiff, unhappy demon. Fingers folded around his neck and her head rested against his. He said nothing, made no motion to move, to push her away or to reciprocate. She noticed that the cold armor had been removed, was gone, just silky hair, and cloth, and Kanaye.

And finally he exhaled a heavy breath, bowing his head as though giving in to a weight that was too heavy for him. "You don't have to grow old here."

She smiled into shadowy blackness at that, feeling suddenly choked by his fumbling attempt at honesty. "I am not a youkai..."

"Of course you're not, idiot. Believe me, if you were, I would already be working toward eight squalling brats that look just like me. All I'm saying is...there are options beyond this place."

She blinked at that, astonished that he would admit such a thing and, strangely, it only made her feel worse. "They need me."

"You need me," he countered angrily, refusing to lift his head and look at her, appearing infuriated that something else took precedence over him. "Do you honestly want to dry up into dust in this hellhole? It's uneccessary, and---"

"I can't, Kanaye," she whispered, hating herself for saying it. How many times had she imagined just such a thing? "Come with me, Zadi. We can stay together, you and I..." And certainly those were not his exact words, but she could interpret the meaning behind what he was saying, could feel that struggle that was forcing the words out. He was grasping at them and it was heart-wrenching to even listen to it, especially now, when she would have to say no. "I have a responsibility to them." Go with him... "There aren't many of us to begin with, and I am the strongest." Stay with him...

Another pervasive silence and his head finally lifted as she withdrew her arms from around him. She watched as his eyes faded from angry and resentful to something that looked more like self-deprecating humor. "Heh...I think I was just rejected by a human."

"It's not rejection," she assured him, hoping that her tone conveyed her sincerity in that. Please do not think so. She forced a light laugh, trying to lighten the mood. "Besides, your ego is strong enough to survive such a thing."

"Certainly...," he agreed, eyes boring into hers as he added seriously, "Whatever it is you're needing to hear, I don't have it in me."

"I don't need to hear anything..."

But she was needed, his insides groaned. It had never been like this with Lien. She had been important, but she had never consumed him as this one had. You horrid little wench, he accused Zadi internally as his arms finally lifted, drawing her back in until there was no separation, enjoying the feel of her body against his, a perfect fit. He was enveloped by that scent, it was familiar to the point of comfort now and he was immersed in it. Encouraged by her and those whispery endearments, within minutes he had given in yet again, arms and legs entwining with hers, absorbing everything that was her, every inhalation and exhalation, murmur and movement. He was entirely certain he would loathe himself for it later.

I'll never forgive you. And as that thought crossed his inflamed mind, he heard his name from her lips and realized that what she had accused him of before was fact; he was a liar, because he'd forgive this woman of absolutely anything.



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Scouring morning light assaulted her closed eyelids, forcing them to shut even tighter, but it was not the only disruption. A familiar voice was calling from outside her door, and Zadi pushed herself up to a sitting position, feeling utterly exhausted, sore beyond expression from that manic, insatiable demon, and momentarily surprised to find him gone. Though she supposed she shouldn't have been, really, and a choking sadness seized her insides, freezing them. Everything had been made so clear. Of course he would rather not face her, and she understood.

She fumbled half-heartedly for something with which to clothe herself, made a vague effort at combing at the tangles in her hair before Koron's voice sounded again, calling her name, and she faintly resented him for not being someone else...

"Come in," she called, uncaring over the obvious disarray of the place. She turned tired eyes on her old friend as he entered her home, noticing that his head was swiveling as though searching for someone. She spotted the bundled object in his hands, recognized it for what it was sure to be, and felt her throat clench slightly.

"Viedi asked me to deliver this. He finished the first sword; worked clear through until dawn to do it," Koron explained. "Is he here?"

"He's gone, Koron," she exhaled, wandering across the room to kneel in front of that ancient mirror. A pale face stared back at her, large eyes that appeared to stare back at her in silent accusation. Why didn't you just say yes? It took so much from him to even offer, and you threw it back in his face. She reached for her comb and began pulling it through the wild, dark tangles.

"Gone?" Koron repeated, seeming to catch onto her mood. "But he left the---"

"He didn't come for the swords," she interjected, turning her head toward him and attempting a rueful smile. She extended her hand to accept the proffered weapon, then reached into a small bag, extracting some coins she placed in Koron's hand. "Please pay Viedi for me. Tell him not to start the next sword. And tell him I appreciate all the effort."

"He won't accept payment from you. Any debt you accumulated is ours as well."

"Then do what you like with it," she shrugged, aware that she sounded more than a little petulant. Today would certainly not be a day for socializing...

"Zadi."

She looked up at the sound of her name, again resenting the fact that it did not come from the voice she wanted to hear. She made up for her horrid thoughts by attempting another smile. "Yes?"

"If he is gone, then why are you still here?" came the question, spoken kindly from the lips of someone who had known her for so long, could read her like an open book, page for page. Koron appeared faintly amused at her grumpy demeanor, and that only made her feel worse for being short with him.

"What do you mean?" she murmured the question, eyeing him suspiciously.

He heaved a sigh, shaking his blonde head in open exasperation as he knelt across from her, pulling the comb from her hands as though in demand of her full attention. "You've been moping around ever since you came back to the village. Don't deny it...and don't think I haven't noticed. I wondered what had happened, what could have gone on to put you into such a mood after having accomplished something as gratifying as Eizan's downfall. You were not yourself, and forgive me for not doing more to understand why that was. I was waiting to see if you would come to me, or if you would emerge from it on your own. And you did...as soon as that youkai arrived in this village you changed, reverted back to the old Zadi. It's a bit obvious, don't you think?"

She listened to his words, stunned that she had unknowingly been behaving in such a manner. "Obvious or not, I have a job to perform here," she reminded him stiffly.

"One we can do without you," Koron answered firmly, and suddenly he was clasping her hand, smiling gently at her out of affectionate understanding. "You are my friend. You have been for decades, over a century. You've saved us all more times than I can count. There have been times when you have single-handedly shouldered the burden of this village, of keeping it safe. I suppose it's a bit like leaving a child behind at this point, hmm? But they always grow up, we've grown up. That's how you know you've done a good job...when the child reaches the point when the parent is no longer needed. You are dear to us, to me, make no mistake, but it's because of that that I am telling you to leave."

She blinked at those words, looked away from him, and moved to start yet another day, distressingly mindful of that presence that was missing...and missed. "Choices are almost always unfair, Koron."

"Then for once make a choice that is not unfair to you," he ordered authoritatively, rising and grabbing her by the shoulders, as though to shake sense into her, but the hands merely clasped onto her arms and his face lowered until he was staring her in the eye, a wide smile crossing his features as he added, "And please don't make me throw you out of the village, my dear. It would be a terrible scene."