InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ What am I? ❯ The Pretender ( Chapter 11 )

Inuyasha tore through the trees at his top sprint, it would take an hour to get back to Kaede’s at this speed, and hopefully it would be well worth it. Miroku’s revelation had shocked him to hell, but his mind quickly grasped a far-fetched solution based on hearsay. He hoped he had heard right and that it wasn’t too late.

The exertion of running felt great. He was feeling drained, and it was keeping him from thinking too much. He was just focused on getting to Kaede. Tree branches slapped his face and body, and the feeling was welcome. His legs strained and his lungs burned, but not once did he slow down. The outwardly pain combined with his rising exhaustion contributed to a fuzzy brain.

All too soon for Inuyasha, he found himself at Kaede’s village. He didn’t stop though until he had her scent and had tracked her down. He tore into her hut with an almost wild expression.

“You old woman!” Inuyasha yelled then fumbled. He hadn’t really though about how he was going to approach the subject.

His face flamed.

“Yes Inuyasha?” Kaede turned calmly and settled her one eye on the hanyou. “Where are the others?”

“They’re where I left them.” Inuyasha side-stepped the question and said no more.

“I assume there is a reason ye have sought me out.” Kaede resumed her puttering around the hut.

“I was looking for a type of tea. I heard of it before.” Inuyasha turned and swore as he realized that his face was hotter than a campfire. He did not want Kaede to see that.

“Inuyasha,” Kaede’s stern voice spoke of restrained impatience, “Ye must be more specific.”

“Like the kind they give to whores.” Inuyasha immediately cringed as if Kagome was there to sit him. He was really glad she didn’t hear that one.

Kaede ceased her actions and gave Inuyasha her full attention with her one critical eye that almost caused him to squirm. He tore his eyes back away and waited with growing irritation for her to just give him the damn leaves to make the tea so he could go. Kaede kept her voice low and even. “What are ye planning Inuyasha?”

Inuyasha’s head shot up in embarrassment and he almost physically backpedaled. “Me? I’m not planning anything! It’s all the damn monk’s fault!”

“Why is he not here then?” Kaede asked.

Inuyasha snapped.

“Just give me the fucking tea!” Inuyasha exploded in her face, claws once again digging into his palms. “I swear to you old hag, if you don’t give me the fucking tea-”

“He sent ye because ye could retrieve it by nightfall.” Kaede guessed wrongly.

“Fuck! He didn’t send for shit! Just give me the leaves.” Inuyasha was shaking with anger. His muscles wound so tightly around his bones that he shook from the pressure.

“If he did not send ye, yet it is his fault, what woman are ye preparing?”

“I ain’t preparing shit! I’m trying to fucking fix it!” He yelled and was met with shocked silence.

Kaede’s eye went wide for a second before she schooled her features. She spoke with slow, drawn-out words. “Inuyasha, perhaps ye have been misinformed. This old woman could be mistaken, as ye have not provided many facts, but the tea must be used before the act occurs. It cannot be used to ‘fix’ anything.”

Inuyasha’s mind drained of hope. Any hopes of stirring up any anger fled as he was overcome with the mind-numbing sense of failure. What good was he really? He couldn’t protect Kagome. His mind wrapped around that he couldn’t even protect a single friend from one of Naraku’s twisted plots. He couldn’t even help. Naraku would make sure that Sango and even little Shippou knew. Even Miroku was a victim, granted much less of a victim in Inuyasha’s eyes.

Inuyasha felt helpless. Unable to do anything as events fell into place, no matter how much he ran around trying to prevent it. He was supposed to protect them, and he couldn’t. Would they now see him for what he really was? Or would they realize that he really was trying?

It didn’t matter. Either way, they would know he was weak. A weak, pathetic half-breed.

“Inuyasha…?” Kaede’s voice broke into his mind.

“Keh,” He covered quickly, “Just forget about it.” With that, he turned and left.

-----

Kagome’s eyes were blurry when she awoke, her hands quickly moving to rub the sleep from her eyes. She quickly realized that Inuyasha was not with her as she sat up within her blankets, her sight set upon an unmoving figure.

It was Miroku.

Thoughts came unbidden to her mind, the way she kissed him, the way he touched her, the way they-

No! Kagome squeezed her eyes shut as she blushed and panicked at the same time, don’t think about that!

“See anything interesting?” A groggy voice made her jump and she hastily opened her eyes. She must have woke him up.

“What?” Kagome asked, a bit confused and instantly nervous.

Miroku just smiled sleepily at her and shook his head to dismiss her question. “Inuyasha will return by nightfall.”

“Where did he go?” Kagome averted her eyes, embarrassed at her thoughts before he interrupted.

“He didn’t say.” Miroku yawned.

“Oh.” Kagome felt uncomfortable, she didn’t really know what to say to him.

Kagome watched as Miroku’s face seemed to sag and he instantly looked miserable. “I’m sorry Kagome.”

Instantly tears came to her eyes and she blinked rapidly to keep them from falling. Thinking about it was one thing, and well, talking was a completely different story. “Miroku…” Kagome started then couldn’t finish, as silent tears trekked down her face.

Immediately Miroku was at her side, tilting her chin up. “Kagome look at me!”

Kagome rose her eyes to meet his and he gave a sharp intake of air. The sorrow and agony in his eyes was unbearable to her and she tore her chin away from his hand and launched herself into his chest. “Don’t you blame yourself either! It‘s as much my fault as yours!” Her voice held her conviction as she tightened her grip on his robes. She then pulled back to give him a shaky smile. “You hear me? It hurts… but we’ll get over it right? It’ll get better! It has to!”

“Your forgiveness knows no bounds.” Miroku whispered to her as he closed his eyes and she felt his hands tighten around her in relief.

“You dummy!” She snapped lightly at him. “I’m not forgiving anyone!”

His eyes widened in shock, and Kagome quickly set about reassuring him.

“I can’t forgive you because it wasn’t your fault…” She looked away quickly. “Besides, I thought everyone would be mad at me.”

“At you? Why?”

“The same reason you think we will be mad at you.” Kagome watched as her words sink in, and was relieved that she must have said the right thing when he gave a short low chuckle.

“Leave it to you Kagome to say the right words.”

She smiled shyly, “I try…”

Her heart gave an extra thump as he leaned down and placed his chin on her shoulder as he pulled her into a hug. His cursed hand lay on her head, threading through her hair. She felt the same stirring as the night before, this time without the drug.

“Miroku?” She whispered softly, “Will things ever be the same?”

She felt him tighten his hold on her and take a shuddering breath before he answered, “I’m not going to lie to you Kagome, so no, I don’t think it will be as they were before.” He paused before continuing quietly at her shoulder, “Though that doesn’t mean that things will be worse now, just think of it as a beginning to a new challenge.”

She smiled into his robes, “You know, you are the one that is good with words.”

He pulled back sharply and gave her his most charismatic smile, “You were in doubt?”

She gave him a appreciative smile, knowing that he was trying to lift her mood in his own way. He was trying to make this as easy on her as possible. She could only wonder what he was going through. Well, she mused, if he’s here for me, then I’ll be here for him.

----

The evening went uneventful. Inuyasha returned right at dusk, but stayed silent most of the night. Not that anyone else really had anything to say.

Sango, being blissfully unaware, continually asked Kagome and Miroku if they were okay, and still kept scolding Inuyasha about the bruise on Miroku’s face, much to Inuyasha’s displeasure. She contributed their quietness to their recovery, not knowing that the substance had already extinguished itself from their systems.

To make a long story short, it was awkward. Tense. If the story was to be believed, Naraku would show up the next day, or a minion. Someone. They had to be ready. They couldn’t leave the village, the villagers were innocent. Osamu had disappeared, and the village headman was a inept idiot.

Shippou, sensing the different dynamics in the group, used it to his advantage. He called on Kagome for candy, steered clear of Inuyasha and Miroku, and kept showing his drawings to Sango. Sango was the most responsive, so he automatically went to her for attention, unknowingly helping by keeping her distracted.

Miroku had questions about Inuyasha’s absence. He had taken off so abruptly. What was going through his mind? Miroku ground the bottom of his staff into the earth in agitation. He didn't feel as if he had just gotten the best lay of his life. He felt horrible, his chest often pulsing with painful pangs when he glanced upon Kagome.

Would she be okay? This situation was like no other he had experienced. There was nothing to draw answers from. Would she really end up with child? The situation was precarious at best, almost anything was ready to tip them over the edge. Their whole rhythm as a group had been disturbed.

Miroku knew that he and Inuyasha had reached what could be called an ‘agreement.’ They saw, acknowledged, and were in the process of trying to work through to solve their issues with the whole situation. After having talked to Kagome, he knew that she would still be there for him. He also knew that Inuyasha and Kagome had no qualms with one another as well. He felt only lingering anxiety around them, knowing that time would erase the cracks in their respective friendships.

His thinking went along the lines of their unstable situation, while separately, they had no problems with each other. As a group Miroku knew not of where the lines were. What if he said the wrong thing to Kagome? Accidentally made insinuations in the heat of an argument about the past?

As pairs, there were few problems, but as a group…

Miroku was not prepared for Naraku. He knew that the insults were coming, the taunting words would be that push to send their group over the edge. On top of that, here they were, leaning over that proverbial cliff, put in that position by Naraku himself.

Even knowing that, there was not much they could do but wait.

Sango… Miroku inwardly flinched as if her name abraded his very mind, sending painful shocks through him. He knew she was going to find out. How could she not? Miroku was ready to see that haunting gleam in Naraku’s eye.

Yet he could not bring himself to speak with Sango. Because he was a coward and could not force those incriminating words from his mouth. Because he didn’t want to face her when her face showed nothing but pain and horror. Because when she found out, he wanted to focus his pain and anger at Naraku himself. Because he was being selfish.

He watched with half an eye as everyone was preparing for bed.

They would not be resting so well tonight.

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Next chapter - finally some action!