InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ What hurts the most ❯ Chapter 1
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By: kytenluvinu 
Anime/Manga: InuYasha Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Drama / Romance / Angst | Type: Songfic | Uploaded On: 07.16.2006 | Updated On: 08.31.2006 | Pages: 3 | Words: 1.9K | Visits: 622 | Status: Completed
Anime/Manga: InuYasha Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Drama / Romance / Angst | Type: Songfic | Uploaded On: 07.16.2006 | Updated On: 08.31.2006 | Pages: 3 | Words: 1.9K | Visits: 622 | Status: Completed
What hurts the most
Song by Rascal Flatts
Fan fiction by Kytenluvinu
Updated
Regrets can be worse than death...
Disclaimer: I don’t own Inuyasha.
When I heard this song by the Rascal Flatts I wanted to cry. Because I have regrets, many in fact. Some of them are so deep seeded that I attempted suicide but lived. I don’t know why I am writing this. But I felt the emotion in the song and I had to write this, I hope you enjoy it. And try to hear the song, it’s beautiful.
He was always found by her grave, no one had to wonder. Because he would always be there, because he wasn’t there when she was alive. It’s been more than thirty years since her death, and he still waited for her ebony hair and brown eyes to peek over the lip of the well. But of course she would never come. And he continued on, living with his regrets. There were so many of them and they threatened to engulf him completely. He still wondered if she could ever forgive him.
I can take the rain on the roof of this empty house
That don’t bother me
I can take a few tears now and then and just let ‘em out
I’m not afraid to cry
Every once and awhile
Even though going on with you gone
Still upsets me
There are days every now and again
I pretend I’m okay
But that’s not what gets me
He was getting old in the years, he chocked it up to the pain in his heart. Sorrow could wear you down quickly in life. The fact that he was almost three hundred years old had nothing to do with it. His grey-silver hair was growing dull and his skin was pale. And his golden eyes hasn’t sparkled for years now. The short list of people he called true friends were worried about him. He made a home in the small village where they first met. Which surprised everyone, sometimes it even surprised him. But she would have wanted it this way, she would have wanted him to stay close to their friends or better yet they were family.
“I wonder what our family would have been like.” He would say sometimes to the stone marker. And sometimes he could see her smile without trying.
What hurts the most
Was being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was trying to do
She accepted him from the first moment, she trusted him a moment later. That first time he saved her life, that first time she saved his. He never knew anyone like her.
When the day is bright and beautiful, he could see her. She would sit with him, and he could feel her all around him. Even if it is just his imagination.
“You still come here?” He would imagine her saying.
“Why wouldn’t I?” He would respond with a smirk.
“Will you ever get over this?” She would continue.
And he would always be honest with her. “No.”
And she would smile. And he would die a little more.
It’s hard to deal with the pain of losing you everywhere I go
But I’m doing it
It’s hard to force that smile when I see our old friends and I’m alone
His family was still around, and they still smiled. They’re age was much more visible than his. Humans were strange that way. But he loved them and their children, and the old him would never had admitted it. But he had enough regret to live with. And she was proud of him, he just knew it. The taijiya was caring and a great mother. The monk was still lecherous but all in good fun, he was an older man. What else was there to do but flirt with young girls. Inuyasha couldn’t help but smile when he watched the husband and wife bicker and the fire neko get her tail pulled by the newest edition to the family.
The smiles would soon fade when he thought of the others in his group. At least the kitsune wasn’t alone. She would always be his mother. He had them buried together. And he wondered what the fox would have been like as an adult, probably a great fighter.
“How’s the runt?” He would ask her sometimes.
“I wish you would stop calling him that.” She would chastise him playfully.
“And how are you?” He would become serious.
And she wouldn’t answer.
Still harder gettin’ up, gettin’ dressed, living with this regret
But I know if I could do it over
I would trade, give away, for the words that I saved in my heart
That I never spoken
He still remembers the day she walked out of his life. No matter how hard he tries to forget...
“I’m afraid.” She was crying. “I don’t want you to go. I have a terrible feeling.”
“What are you afraid of, Naraku is dead and you have Shippou with you.” He grunted. “There is no danger here.”
“But why can’t you stay with me!” She cried.
“Because Kikyou needs me more than you do!” He regretted he statement the moment he uttered it. She cried but he remained silent. “I’ll come back.”
He turned to leave. But her voice stopped him.
“Inuyasha, good bye.” She whispered.
“What are you talking about. I’m bringing Kikyou back.” The brash boy sneered. The girl took in a sharp breath and lowered her head. The boy turned and frowned. “Kagome, I’m coming back.”
She smiled sadly. “I know Inuyasha. I know.”
And he still wondered why he didn’t follow his heart and stay.
What hurts the most
Was being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
“I came back, Kagome.” The hanyou said to the grave marker. “But it was too late.”
He remembered seeing Kikyou again...
“You have changed, Inuyasha.” The undead beauty was still weak from the final battle with Naraku. “Why did you come here?”
Inuyasha had never truly expressed his feelings before. So this was going to be difficult. “I’ve came to bring you back to your village.” He said. “Kaede can help you regain your strength.”
“You still harbor hopes for us, Inuyasha?” Kikyou smiled. “Is that why you want me to return.”
“I want you to live.” Was his response.
Kikyou waited for him to say more, when he didn’t she spoke. “Inuyasha, you love her don’t you?”
The question surprised him. “What!”
Kikyou laughed softly. Suddenly a look of fear and pain passed across her features. Inuyasha was confused.
“Kikyou, what is it?” Inuyasha placed a hand on her shoulder. He jumped back when he felt her shiver. He didn’t think she was capable of that.
“S-something is wrong.” Kikyou struggled and collapsed to her knees. Clutching her chest. “Our–her soul. It’s trying to break free from me.”
“I don’t understand! What’s happening?!” Inuyasha was beginning to panic.
Kikyou looked up with hurt eyes. “Her soul cannot rest until it is complete.”
“What are you saying!” Inuyasha yelled.
Kikyou closed her eyes, than looked up with tired lids. “She’s dying Inuyasha.”
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was trying to do
Inuyasha sighed as he traced the names on the grave with one claw.
“Kikyou died, on the way back she shattered in my arms.” Inuyasha lowered his head. “And you...you were gone before I could save you.” Inuyasha chuckled miserably. “You tried to save her from those bandits didn’t you, Shippou. You were a brave kid.” Inuyasha stopped at Kagome’s name. “Who knew that you could survive through countless demons, and that bastard, Naraku. Who knew that you could be raped and beaten and murdered by weak humans. Who knew that I wouldn’t be there to save you.” Inuyasha sighed. “I tracked down their scents and killed them, made them suffer. But that didn’t satisfy me like I thought it should. Because you were still gone. I wasn’t there for you.” Inuyasha felt the tears come much stronger now.
“Inuyasha.” She came back to sit with him.
“You were alone, I wasn’t there!” The hanyou screamed. The sweet young miko reached out to touch his arm, but he felt nothing. He fell to his knees and choked on his sobs. “I wasn’t there! I wasn’t there! I wasn’t fucking there for you KAGOME!!!” Inuyasha beat his fists into the ground and just cried. “Kagome, I was coming back to tell you something.” He managed to say almost inaudible to anyone else. But he knew she could hear him.
“Say it now, Inuyasha.” Kagome smiled. “No more regrets.” Inuyasha was breathing heavily. After a long moment he sat up and looked at the girl he knew wasn’t really smiling at him with eyes that weren’t really there. “Say it, Inuyasha.”
And what hurts the most
Was being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was trying to do
“Kagome, I love you.”
And not seeing that loving you
That’s what I was trying to do
And then she smiled. It was the most brilliant smile he had ever seen her give him. And it was real, he reached his hand out and gasped...
And that is how the story ends. Did Inuyasha touch flesh or air. Was he dead or by some miracle did Kagome come back with the power of love. Well this is how I wanted it to end. Because life is uncertain for everyone. Please review, I would love the feedback. Thanks!
Song by Rascal Flatts
Fan fiction by Kytenluvinu
Updated
Regrets can be worse than death...
Disclaimer: I don’t own Inuyasha.
When I heard this song by the Rascal Flatts I wanted to cry. Because I have regrets, many in fact. Some of them are so deep seeded that I attempted suicide but lived. I don’t know why I am writing this. But I felt the emotion in the song and I had to write this, I hope you enjoy it. And try to hear the song, it’s beautiful.
He was always found by her grave, no one had to wonder. Because he would always be there, because he wasn’t there when she was alive. It’s been more than thirty years since her death, and he still waited for her ebony hair and brown eyes to peek over the lip of the well. But of course she would never come. And he continued on, living with his regrets. There were so many of them and they threatened to engulf him completely. He still wondered if she could ever forgive him.
I can take the rain on the roof of this empty house
That don’t bother me
I can take a few tears now and then and just let ‘em out
I’m not afraid to cry
Every once and awhile
Even though going on with you gone
Still upsets me
There are days every now and again
I pretend I’m okay
But that’s not what gets me
He was getting old in the years, he chocked it up to the pain in his heart. Sorrow could wear you down quickly in life. The fact that he was almost three hundred years old had nothing to do with it. His grey-silver hair was growing dull and his skin was pale. And his golden eyes hasn’t sparkled for years now. The short list of people he called true friends were worried about him. He made a home in the small village where they first met. Which surprised everyone, sometimes it even surprised him. But she would have wanted it this way, she would have wanted him to stay close to their friends or better yet they were family.
“I wonder what our family would have been like.” He would say sometimes to the stone marker. And sometimes he could see her smile without trying.
What hurts the most
Was being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was trying to do
She accepted him from the first moment, she trusted him a moment later. That first time he saved her life, that first time she saved his. He never knew anyone like her.
When the day is bright and beautiful, he could see her. She would sit with him, and he could feel her all around him. Even if it is just his imagination.
“You still come here?” He would imagine her saying.
“Why wouldn’t I?” He would respond with a smirk.
“Will you ever get over this?” She would continue.
And he would always be honest with her. “No.”
And she would smile. And he would die a little more.
It’s hard to deal with the pain of losing you everywhere I go
But I’m doing it
It’s hard to force that smile when I see our old friends and I’m alone
His family was still around, and they still smiled. They’re age was much more visible than his. Humans were strange that way. But he loved them and their children, and the old him would never had admitted it. But he had enough regret to live with. And she was proud of him, he just knew it. The taijiya was caring and a great mother. The monk was still lecherous but all in good fun, he was an older man. What else was there to do but flirt with young girls. Inuyasha couldn’t help but smile when he watched the husband and wife bicker and the fire neko get her tail pulled by the newest edition to the family.
The smiles would soon fade when he thought of the others in his group. At least the kitsune wasn’t alone. She would always be his mother. He had them buried together. And he wondered what the fox would have been like as an adult, probably a great fighter.
“How’s the runt?” He would ask her sometimes.
“I wish you would stop calling him that.” She would chastise him playfully.
“And how are you?” He would become serious.
And she wouldn’t answer.
Still harder gettin’ up, gettin’ dressed, living with this regret
But I know if I could do it over
I would trade, give away, for the words that I saved in my heart
That I never spoken
He still remembers the day she walked out of his life. No matter how hard he tries to forget...
“I’m afraid.” She was crying. “I don’t want you to go. I have a terrible feeling.”
“What are you afraid of, Naraku is dead and you have Shippou with you.” He grunted. “There is no danger here.”
“But why can’t you stay with me!” She cried.
“Because Kikyou needs me more than you do!” He regretted he statement the moment he uttered it. She cried but he remained silent. “I’ll come back.”
He turned to leave. But her voice stopped him.
“Inuyasha, good bye.” She whispered.
“What are you talking about. I’m bringing Kikyou back.” The brash boy sneered. The girl took in a sharp breath and lowered her head. The boy turned and frowned. “Kagome, I’m coming back.”
She smiled sadly. “I know Inuyasha. I know.”
And he still wondered why he didn’t follow his heart and stay.
What hurts the most
Was being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
“I came back, Kagome.” The hanyou said to the grave marker. “But it was too late.”
He remembered seeing Kikyou again...
“You have changed, Inuyasha.” The undead beauty was still weak from the final battle with Naraku. “Why did you come here?”
Inuyasha had never truly expressed his feelings before. So this was going to be difficult. “I’ve came to bring you back to your village.” He said. “Kaede can help you regain your strength.”
“You still harbor hopes for us, Inuyasha?” Kikyou smiled. “Is that why you want me to return.”
“I want you to live.” Was his response.
Kikyou waited for him to say more, when he didn’t she spoke. “Inuyasha, you love her don’t you?”
The question surprised him. “What!”
Kikyou laughed softly. Suddenly a look of fear and pain passed across her features. Inuyasha was confused.
“Kikyou, what is it?” Inuyasha placed a hand on her shoulder. He jumped back when he felt her shiver. He didn’t think she was capable of that.
“S-something is wrong.” Kikyou struggled and collapsed to her knees. Clutching her chest. “Our–her soul. It’s trying to break free from me.”
“I don’t understand! What’s happening?!” Inuyasha was beginning to panic.
Kikyou looked up with hurt eyes. “Her soul cannot rest until it is complete.”
“What are you saying!” Inuyasha yelled.
Kikyou closed her eyes, than looked up with tired lids. “She’s dying Inuyasha.”
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was trying to do
Inuyasha sighed as he traced the names on the grave with one claw.
“Kikyou died, on the way back she shattered in my arms.” Inuyasha lowered his head. “And you...you were gone before I could save you.” Inuyasha chuckled miserably. “You tried to save her from those bandits didn’t you, Shippou. You were a brave kid.” Inuyasha stopped at Kagome’s name. “Who knew that you could survive through countless demons, and that bastard, Naraku. Who knew that you could be raped and beaten and murdered by weak humans. Who knew that I wouldn’t be there to save you.” Inuyasha sighed. “I tracked down their scents and killed them, made them suffer. But that didn’t satisfy me like I thought it should. Because you were still gone. I wasn’t there for you.” Inuyasha felt the tears come much stronger now.
“Inuyasha.” She came back to sit with him.
“You were alone, I wasn’t there!” The hanyou screamed. The sweet young miko reached out to touch his arm, but he felt nothing. He fell to his knees and choked on his sobs. “I wasn’t there! I wasn’t there! I wasn’t fucking there for you KAGOME!!!” Inuyasha beat his fists into the ground and just cried. “Kagome, I was coming back to tell you something.” He managed to say almost inaudible to anyone else. But he knew she could hear him.
“Say it now, Inuyasha.” Kagome smiled. “No more regrets.” Inuyasha was breathing heavily. After a long moment he sat up and looked at the girl he knew wasn’t really smiling at him with eyes that weren’t really there. “Say it, Inuyasha.”
And what hurts the most
Was being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was trying to do
“Kagome, I love you.”
And not seeing that loving you
That’s what I was trying to do
And then she smiled. It was the most brilliant smile he had ever seen her give him. And it was real, he reached his hand out and gasped...
And that is how the story ends. Did Inuyasha touch flesh or air. Was he dead or by some miracle did Kagome come back with the power of love. Well this is how I wanted it to end. Because life is uncertain for everyone. Please review, I would love the feedback. Thanks!