InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ When there is a full moon ❯ The Simple Secret ( Chapter 14 )

Author's note: Bet you all thought I'd given up on the story, hadn't you? Or maybe I was dead or had been kidnapped or was otherwise unable to continue writing my story. Well you were sort of close. I ended up having a lot of things piled onto my shoulders this summer. I'm telling you now: it is not fun spending two months straight with only your father and brother. They make you do all the work. But anyway, I'm sorry it took me so long to come up with the next chapter. I also was hit by an extreme case of writer's block. You see, I've had little inspiration during the past two months and was stuck mulling over the story at odd moments of time. I am sorry it took so long, but now I'm back on track and my mom and sister are coming back in four days time so I can spend a lot more time on this. Anyway, enjoy!

PS. I have my French teacher to thank me for the French quotes. Thanks Mrs. Robinson!

The Simple Secret

Voici mon secret. Il est très simple : on ne voit bien qu'avec le cœur. L'essentiel est invisible pour les yeux…Les hommes ont oublié cette vérité. Mais tu ne dois pas l'oublier.

~Le Petit Prince

He stared at her for a long time, not even blinking, simply drinking in the sight of her with hungry eyes. The heavy rained had made her clothes stick to her, leaving almost nothing to the imagination. She seemed to be aware of his unfaltering gaze and she shifted nervously in her spot.

"H-how long have you been here?" her shaky voice stumbled across the night air. Sesshoumaru remained silent; he saw no need to respond to her question.

The miko took a hesitant step towards him, her slight movement snapping him back to the present.

"Wh-what're you doing here?" she asked, this time her voice a little less unsure.

Again he gave no response. He stood watching her, his mind quickly making a decision that its owner was barely aware of. He remained so for so long that the girl was beginning to lose her patience. He could sense her nervousness quickly ebb away and be replaced with a mildly growing impatience. He decided it was time to stop her before she said anything. "What did the hanyou want from you?" his voice was completely neutral, his eyes filled with seriousness.

Kagome quirked an eyebrow at him. "I don't know. Why don't you tell me? Better yet, why don't you tell me what you're doing here? And where's Inuyasha?"

His eyes narrowed a little less than a fraction, the only outward sign of his irritation. "The hanyou's not here," he quipped out coldly.

Kagome crossed her arms in front of her chest in indignation. "Sure he is, I saw him myself."

She sounded so sure that Sesshoumaru had to smell the air to make sure he hadn't missed his half-brother's presence. There was no sign of him. He glared back at the intoxicating miko standing defiantly before him, wondering what on Earth she was talking about. It suddenly hit him, the realization bringing him a pang of disappointment that was foreign to him. "Did you think it was the hanyou who relieved you of your guards?" his voice was mocking.

The girl stiffened immediately, her eyes searching him suspiciously. "You mean it wasn't him?" she whispered as though to herself. "But I'm sure I saw him, unless that…" she drifted off, a look of understanding and surprise covering her face. The lightning flashed again up above, its light glistening against her wet hair. She was looking at him with a steadfast stare, not even blinking as she studied his face for any sign of deception. "It was you then, wasn't it?" she asked hesitantly as she took a step towards him.

Sesshoumaru inclined his head slightly.

She nodded back at him, her eyes trained on him as she continued her slow march towards him. Lightning flashed above their heads and the rain poured down with a purpose. Kagome said something but it was lost in the clap of thunder that followed. Sesshoumaru waited till the rumbling stopped and then indicated for her to repeat herself.

She flashed him one of her grateful smiles that had been etched into his memory without his own control, stopping mere inches away from him. The glint in her eyes outshone the flash of the next lightning. Without hesitation or any warning, she threw her arms around him, her scent overpowering the heavy scent of the rain, washing over him in calming, yet strong waves. He was too shocked to even react to her; all that crossed his mind was her position against him and how oddly comforting it was despite the almost electric shock that it sent through his body. She was just as, if not more, evocative as the thunder storm that was playing itself around them.

The rumble of the thunder faded into the night and she freed him from her grasp. "I said thank you," she repeated herself simply with a smile that reached beyond her eyes.

He could not help the shiver that ran down his spine from the image she presented. His arms itched to pull her back against his body. He sternly held back. Recovering his normal demeanour, he asked stoically, "What did the hanyou want from you?"

Her smile faltered at the curtness of his words but she shrugged it off, her face red with either anger or embarrassment. "I already told you," her voice was strong, almost steely, her eyes boring into his as though searching for something. He could see the confusion in them and had to fight hard to keep from trying to comfort her. "He came for me after Inuyasha left. I didn't even see him when I was conscious. I suppose he just wanted the shards; he had sent Kagura for them."

She had stepped away from him.

The rain was slowing in its downpour. Sesshoumaru said nothing. "Thank you Sesshoumaru-sama for helping me." She stepped further away from him, half turning her back towards him. "I'm gonna see if I can find Inuyasha; I'm sure my friends are all worried ab-,"

"You are hurt," he almost blurted out, managing to keep his voice level at the last possible second. Kagome stopped short, turning to look at him with wide eyes. Her hand flew to the base of her skull, careful not to touch the abused flesh.

"Um…I realized that," she said.

"Your human body takes too long to repair such minor damages. No wonder so many of you die as quickly as you do." He wasn't sure why he had said that, something highly unusual since the Taiyoukai was never one to speak without thinking. Yet this girl, this breathing sedative, seemed to have the most unwanted side-effects.

Her eyes flashed for a moment with anger, but she forced it down. "You don't have to worry, my human body will heal me soon enough."

Her voice was cold and almost as harsh as his; it made Sesshoumaru feel highly disconcerted. But his decision that he had made merely a few moments past forced him to continue. "It needs to be tended to."

Kagome looked at him with surprise. Could he be worried? Nah, Sesshoumaru, worried? Hah, that's a laugh! Yet even as she thought these thoughts, his arm reached out slowly, torturously, and fingered the cut on the base of her skull almost tentatively. The sudden contact made her knees tremble with queasiness. She clutched his hand desperately, trying to keep her balance as her vision swam.

"Why don't you heal it?" his voice was almost gentle even though its owner had gone stock still.

She raised her eyes to his. "What was that?"

The demon lord almost let out a sigh. "Heal, why don't you heal it? I've seen you heal others enough times to know you are capable."

Lightning flashed again, this time followed by a distant thunder. Kagome flashed him a rueful smile. "Can't do, never could. I've tried. I can only heal others it would seem. But it'll be better in a few days."

That's not good enough, the thought flashed through his mind before he could stop himself. Wasn't it just so typical of fate to take away her ability to heal herself? Without thinking twice about it, Sesshoumaru's free hand had reached down to Tensaiga's hilt as the sword hummed gently at his hip.

Kagome's eyes widened as she watched his hand inch towards the hilt of his sword. His face was empty as usual, but there was a faraway look in his eyes that gave Kagome the distinct impression that Sesshoumaru was under a spell. For one wild moment, she thought he was about to decapitate her and she could not think why that was. All she knew was the sickening fear that raked her body and she took an involuntary step away from him, her face wary with alarm. Her movement seamed to jolt him back to the present. His eyes hardened as he arrested himself from unsheathing his sword not a minute too soon. Something akin to anger flashed across his features but had vanished before Kagome could decipher it exactly for what it was.

Sesshoumaru was furious with himself. His self control was so lacking that he hadn't even realised that he was reaching for his sword. Had the miko not stepped away from him, he would have gone as far as healing her which would have been an undeniable proof for something he did not wish to admit to. He schooled his features back to their characteristic indifference. The miko was watching him carefully now through a calculating gaze that flashed continuously between him and the sword he had been reaching for. He knew by her previous look of fear that she had not recognized the sword as Tensaiga.

"I'm not going to kill you," Sesshoumaru said quietly. 'At least not anymore!' a voice echoed in his mind which he ignored. "You have no reason to show me this much fear."

"That's not what it looked like a few minutes ago," Kagome answered, but moved back to where she had been before anyway. "You're eyes were all glazed over. I thought you might have been under a spell or something." She was glad her voice wasn't as tremulous as her knees felt. She had come across many demons who wanted to kill her. Heck, Sesshoumaru himself had at least tried to kill her enough times to get her used to the idea. But she had been so unnerved by the idea of him attacking her again that she was angry at herself for acting so vulnerable.

He waved aside what she said to the back of his mind. He did not wish to dwell upon his slip of the mind for longer than necessary. "I guarantee you, I was acting under no one else's accord other than my own. You think me so weak that I would let myself be exposed to such feeble things as spells?"

He sounded so affronted that Kagome lost all traces of fear that were left in her in the face of her amusement. She waved aside the notion carelessly, trying hard not to laugh out loud lest she upset him even more. "No, no, of course not! It was just weird, that's all!"

Sesshoumaru regarded her for a while, trying to decide the best way to take her words. Finally deciding that he would rather talk about something else, he changed the subject. "You have never told me why you hunt the shards? Do you wish to become stronger?"

She frowned at him and he wasn't sure why. "What do you think?" she asked impatiently. She would have thought that after knowing her for this long he should have been able to know that she would never use the jewel for her own benefits.

Sesshoumaru's eyes narrowed as the last few drops of the night's storm tumbled down through the trees. "Answer the question."

Trying not to show her anger she said in a very curt voice, "I collect them so that I could fix the jewel. It's my duty."

He frowned at her words; why would it be her duty? "Perhaps you can explain something to me: why is it that you can sense the whereabouts of the jewel shards? I am sure it is not a trait you have inherited from the dead priestess; she can only purify them."

Kagome shrugged. "I'm not sure, but it might be because it - you know what, I'm not actually sure, so let's leave it at that." She didn't think it was any of his business that the jewel had come out of her body. Plus, his questioning was making her feel more and more uncomfortable and angry by the second. His face flashed with arrogant anger which Kagome foolishly ignored. "Look, I was separated from Inuyasha and I'm sure he's looking for me right now. And frankly, I would really rather find him soon. He's got my sleeping bag and I really don't want to be sleeping on the forest floor, especially since it's wet. Well, anyway, that's besides the -,"

She was cut short as a clawed palm clamped tightly over her mouth. She focused back on to Sesshoumaru, a very dangerous looking Sesshoumaru. He's eyes were flashing as though they had sucked in the lightings of the night and his face was so full of apparent anger that Kagome found herself wishing for the stoicism that she had hated before.

Sesshoumaru leaned in closer to her, his eyes locked onto hers and he could see the sudden apprehension in them. It did nothing to sooth the anger that was toiling within him. "When I ask you a question," he said in his deadliest voice, "you are to answer me whether you want to or not." He could already see the defiance growing in her eyes and the way she was squaring her shoulders. He knew she was growing angry as her scent grew stronger.

He didn't give her the chance to say anything, instead pushing her against a close by tree with enough force to wind her. She gasped into his hand, and what had once been apprehension was quickly turned into fear, her scent overpowering that of the rain-washed night, something that excited Sesshoumaru in a most intriguing way.

Tensaiga vibrated as though with anticipation.

They stayed like that for a long while, each staring into the eyes of the other with purpose. Finally, Kagome swallowed and nodded slightly. She seemed to be waiting for something, and as Sesshoumaru did nothing, she frowned again and started to talk. The soft brush of her lips against his palm almost made him jump with a mingle of surprise and one of those unwanted feelings that he'd been having lately. He tried his best to ignore the quickly rising pace of his pulse. Yet she continued to talk, her words muffled into his hand. Her breath tickled his palm until he could no longer withstand it.

The sword at his hip was beating relentlessly again.

He did the only thing he could do and caved into the craving that had so suddenly sprung in him. He dropped his hand, but Kagome had barely enough time to suck in her breath before her lips were clamped again, only this time with the demon lord's mouth.

Inuyasha dashed through the forest, the rain beating down on his body. His mind was in a state of near panic. He knew he had to find Naraku if he wanted to find Kagome. And Naraku had disappeared so suddenly that Inuyasha had no hopes of finding him. His heart hammered madly in his chest, making his feet almost shaky. He had to save Kagome.

Sango followed him silently on Kirara's back, her huge boomerang latched onto her back and ready to be used. She had a worried look etched onto her face; too many people that she cared about were in danger at this time, so much that she was close to tears. Yet she held back, refusing to show any signs of weakness in the face of fear. She knew that Inuyasha didn't know where he was really going and neither did Kirara; a fact that did nothing to calm her frayed nerves. But she continued to follow Inuyasha with desperation.

Both their minds were confused and jostled by Naraku's odd appearance. They had no idea why he would think that Kagome and Sesshoumaru's sword were connected. And why would such a connection be so important to the hanyou? It simply made no sense. And for the hanyou to go through so much trouble over such an insignificant piece of information, it was out of character for the hanyou.

The rain poured down on the trio and lightning flashed with menace. They continued their futile search without hope, not minding the thunder that shook the air itself. All that mattered for the moment was to find either Kagome or Naraku., the former of which was preferable.

At first, she was too shocked to do anything but barely feel the lips that were moving so ravenously yet softly against her own. She was breathing really fast, almost panting, her body succumbed to his will. Images flashed in the back of her mind, images of Sesshoumaru. He was fighting against them, threatening to kill her, Sesshoumaru pulling out Tokijin for the first time, Sesshoumaru saving her from Mokutsu, Sesshoumaru sitting behind the waterfall, his eyes focused on a point far, far away.

In response to Kagome's total lack of reaction and the growing hunger within himself, Sesshoumaru stepped in closer so that he could feel every curve of her body against his own, and ran his arm along her back, his own breathing becoming shallow by the electric surge of pleasure that followed.

Tensaiga thrummed with exhilaration that only added to his need.

The images suddenly switched to those of Inuyasha, Inuyasha trying to protect them, Inuyasha swearing grumpily after having been 'sat' six feet into the ground, Inuyasha fighting against this very man that was kissing her, Inuyasha hugging her.

He felt rather than saw her hands rising to rest on his chest, only then realising that his eyes had closed. He hastily opened his eyes only to see that Kagome was looking back at him with anger evident in her dark eyes. Her hands pushed against his chest and he let himself be moved to their will. He stood a foot away from her, her hand firmly placed over his chest as though making sure he wasn't about to step in closer to her again. The blasted sword continued vibrating madly at his side. His whole mind and body could think of nothing else but the need to continue kissing her. It was official, she was an aphrodisiac.

Kagome nailed him with as angry a look as she could muster, trying her best to ignore the blush that threatened to cover her cheeks, and said, "What was that?"

There was no answer.

"What did you mean by that?" she said more forcefully, her heart hammering somewhere near her throat.

Still no answer.

"Argh! Come on, Sesshoumaru, you must have something to say? No use playing dead!"

"I am always surprised by human crudeness," he said crisply, his face finally slipping back to its stoic mask.

She had to fight hard in order to restrain from yelling. She shut her eyes tightly, breathing in slowly, her face still as red as a tomato. "Look, I think I deserve to be told what that…that…um…that was for," she said in a forcibly calm voice.

Again, her words were met with silence.

In a rush of anger she pushed away from him angrily and turned her back on him with a great sigh of exasperation.

Sesshoumaru watched as she began to stump away from him, splattering mud into the air with the force of her anger. His own mind was in a state of chaos it had absolutely never been before, a mixture of excitement, ecstasy, and anger at himself for his lack of control. He barely noted the growing urgency with which Tensaiga thrummed at his side. There was a strange fire burning within him. He wanted to make her stay, make her talk to him. He wanted to know how far he could push her limits. "You are provoked by the most insignificant of matters."

She stopped dead in her tracks, her back rigid and tense. "Why did you kiss me? Was that an 'insignificant matter'?" Her voice was quiet and he could not distinguish the emotion behind it.

He could not answer her. He didn't know.

She whirled around to face him, her face alive with fury. "Was it, or was it not?" she said in the same calm voice, and he knew she was barely keeping herself in check.

He hesitated, and then said, "I cannot give you an answer that I do not know."

This seemed to catch her off guard. Her eyes widened with disbelief but were soon refilled with anger. "WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DON'T KNOW?!" she yelled with frustration. Her emotions were on a very unpredictable rollercoaster and Sesshoumaru was not helping the matter. Having been just kissed by a demon lord seemed to have an unwanted effect. "You must know why you … did that; you're Sesshoumaru. HOW could you NOT know?"

Once more her scent was beginning to overpower his mind. Not wanting a repeat of what had happened a few seconds ago, Sesshoumaru stepped further from her, ignoring her angry words.

"Argh," she exclaimed exasperatedly. She wanted to get away from him as soon as possible. She shook her head, and then looked back at him with forced calm. "Look, I neither have the time nor the patience for this. I want to find Inuyasha." She looked at him thoughtfully for a while before continuing to say, "I can pretend that this never happened, if you want me to."

Silence met these words, interrupted only by the occasional drip of the rain into small puddles. Finally, Sesshoumaru spoke. "Why did you pull away?"

Kagome felt as though she had walked straight into a brick wall. Wasn't it obvious? She tilted her head to the side and asked, "What?"

"Was it because of the hanyou?" Sesshoumaru persisted, his face and voice stoic, his mind a mess.

Kagome opened her mouth to disagree, her anger cooling in the face of her confusion. But she clamped her mouth closed as she locked eyes with him. She had pushed him away because of Inuyasha, hadn't she? She had felt guilty knowing that at that very moment he was searching for her, putting his life on the spot for her safety and she was kissing his despised brother. With sudden resolution, Kagome nodded her head.

Tensaiga stilled suddenly.

Jealousy burned through his body like wild fire. He's jaw was clamped so tightly that he could barely get out his next words. "Do you love him?"

Kagome looked away from him. She spotted a small boulder near her and sat on it, crossing her arms in the process. She placed her chin on her crossed arms and answered the demon. "Whether I love him or not is not important to you. Or at least, it shouldn't be. I have no reason to answer you."

It took all his concentration not to lose control. She was now regarding him with an almost bored expression. He had the distinct impression that she was trying to provoke him using his own tactics. He took a moment to securely rein in his temper, making sure he wouldn't do anything rash. He then walked purposefully towards her and sat down beside her on the boulder. The effect was immediate; Kagome tensed in half a heartbeat. Yet she did not leave the boulder. She squared her shoulders and trained her eyes coldly onto him, raising one eyebrow in the process. "What if I gave you a reason?"

Kagome swallowed hard, pushing down her curiosity ruthlessly. "Then I'd have to judge how good this 'reason' of yours would be." She was wary of how close he was sitting to her and could not help a small blush.

He considered her for a while, leaning back on his elbows and regarding her thoughtfully. Tensaiga was lying dormant at his hips as though it had not been gyrating like it had a few minutes ago.

Kagome's features softened as she continued to look at him. She had noticed how he seemed to be holding himself back and trying to appear relaxed. His efforts helped sooth her bruised pride a bit and calm her frayed nerves. She found herself a little more eager to actually listen to him despite her nagging urge to find Inuyasha. Well, if I stay in one place, Inuyasha would have a better chance of finding me, she told herself. Plus, while I'm with Sesshoumaru I'm safe…at least from other demons.

She didn't know how long Sesshoumaru and her stared at each other. A raindrop dripped down onto her head from an above branch, forcing her back to the present. She gave him a reproachful look and said, "You know, if there's something you need to tell me, I'd be more than willing to listen."

She could just see the corners of his lips twitching. "I hardly doubt that."

Kagome frowned. "What could be so bad that you can't tell me?"

"Do not forget your place, human! I shall tell you that which I want when I please." His words were cruel and cutting, yet Kagome could just sense a hidden ring of amusement in his voice.

Once more she pushed down her rising temper. "We're not enemies anymore, remember? I can be your friend. If you can find it in yourself to save my life, then you should also be able to tell me whatever it is that's bothering you," she said, trying her best not to think of the kiss of a few minutes ago. Despite it, she knew she wanted to help him.

He frowned inwardly at her persistence. But her offer had just opened a new door for him. He just wasn't sure whether it was the right to time to use it. Should he ask her to play out the promise that she had made so long ago?

"It can't hurt to tell me, could it?" Kagome added encouragingly.

Sesshoumaru had finally made up his mind. "Do you love him?" he asked simply.

He had successfully changed the course of their conversation.

Again, Kagome frowned, feeling uncomfortable. "Why do you want to know so badly? It's not like you care, honestly."

Sesshoumaru kept his stoic mask on and only repeated himself.

Kagome threw her hands up in agitation. Why would he care? He had always hated Inuyasha, hadn't he? Why would he suddenly be so interested in his affairs? "You're not gonna tell me why, are you?"

Sesshoumaru shook his head slightly.

He watched her as she sighed in defeat. She pulled up her knees close to her body, wrapping her arms around them and then burying her face in their warmth. After a few moments pause, she lifted her head enough to place her chin on one of her knees. "At least tell me what you think?" she kept her eyes trained on a point straight ahead of her as she spoke. Some of her wet hair slid over her shoulder to dangle against her thigh.

Sesshoumaru scented the air and noticed that her scent was less concentrated than it had been before. This was a bit of a relief since he always found it harder to concentrate with her scent distracting him. Now that the rain had stopped, a cool breeze was softly blowing throw the trees; it was very comforting after the night's heat.

"Do you think I love him?" she asked persistently.

"From what I can see…," he said at last.

He could just see an odd smile tilting her lips. Was it rueful or mocking? "And do you believe what you see?"

"I can only believe what I can see."

Her smile widened. "You sound unsure," she said simply. "My mom told me a secret a long time ago that helped me know what I needed to know. It's almost always foolproof."

Sesshoumaru raised his eyebrows in question. "You say that I'm wrong in my observation?" he sounded sceptical.

"I never said that…," she said vaguely. "I'm only suggesting that you can't always rely on what you see."

"And you have a better way?" he was curious to know.

"I just told you that my mother told me it," she said softly, almost dreamily. She lifted her head off her knee and turned to look straight into his eyes. He could see that her eyes were serious yet full of confusion. "Do you want to know?"

He gave a slight nod of his head.

The vague smile vanished from her face and she looked at him more piercingly than ever. He could not help it, but all of his attention was drawn to her. "Here's my secret," she said softly, her eyes unflinching. "It's very simple: one only sees well with his heart. The essential is invisible to the eyes…" she fell silent. She allowed her eyes to drift away from his, pulling herself out of the momentary trance that she had thrown both of them into. "My secret is a reality. Men, demons too, have forgotten this reality. But you don't have to forget."