InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Which Me Do You Know? ❯ Inuyasha's Loves, Pains, and his Mistake ( Chapter 9 )

Ch. 9: Inuyasha's Loves, Pains, and his Mistake

 

Throughout the next week, Inuyasha spent his time talking to his therapist twice a week, getting to know Kagome better, screwing around with Niruko, and trying to get Kikyo to talk to him. She was still mad that he pushed her and that he got a boyfriend. Inuyasha tried to explain that it was his split personality that caused him to do stupid things, but Kikyo wouldn't listen; she was so stubborn sometimes.

 

Finally, Inuyasha got a chance to talk to her at lunch.

“Kikyo, just listen to me, please,” Inuyasha pleaded.

“What, Inuyasha?”

“I'm really sorry about what happened at the party; I lost my temper and hurt you, but I didn't mean to do it.”

 

“You've never done that before. I mean, we got into fights and shit but you never laid a hand on me. Why is that different now?”

“I haven't told a lot of people this, so I'd really appreciate if you'd keep it between me and you.”

“Yeah, your secret's safe with me.”

 

“I have a split personality. I'm taking meds to control it, but it takes a while for the meds to kick it. When I change into my alter person, I feel dark and sometimes violent. A lot of the times I want to be alone, but when I'm with someone, all I want to do is be in control,” Inuyasha informed.

 

“Well how come you didn't hurt your boyfriend?” Kikyo asked.

“I didn't hurt him because he's lets me be in control. I don't have to make him.”

“So how many metal problems do you have?”

“A lot; I have a spilt personality, depression, paranoia, and sleeplessness. I'm taking meds for all of that.”

 

“Oh my God…I had no idea. Why didn't you tell me!? Tell me why I'm always that last to know shit like this!?”

“I didn't tell you because I thought you wouldn't want to be with me if you found out. I thought you'd think I was some kind of freak.”

“Inuyasha, I love you, and I'd never think that. Do you really think I'm such a bad person that I'd break it with you because of that!?”

 

“No Kikyo…I don't, part of the reason was because I didn't want to believe I had all those problems myself. My depression and split personally may never go away; I might have to take meds and worry about having sanity lapses for the rest of my life. The meds for the SP (split personality) will eventually kinda merge the two personalities, so I may never be the same Inuyasha again. That scares me.”

 

“Oh Inuyasha…don't be such a freaking baby…you'll always be the same no matter what.” Kikyo's voice was lacking both empathy and compassion, but Inuyasha smiled anyways.

 

After lunch, Inuyasha talked to Kagome.

“Well, I told Kikyo about my many disorders,” Inuyasha informed.

“What'd she say?” Kagome asked.

“Well…the part where she chewed me out or the part where she had no compassion when I spilled my guts.”

“Ouch…that bad.”

 

“Kikyo can hold a grudge forever. I wish I hadn't forgotten that when I asked out Niruko.”

“Well…if you really love Kikyo…then I guess you should break up with Niruko…”

“I love Kikyo to death, but she just doesn't make me feel the same way as Niruko does. I mean, it could be lust talking, but he just makes me feel like me and him are the only two people on the earth when I'm with him. Kikyo doesn't do that for me anymore.”

 

“Well, keep Niruko…let things stay like they are with Kikyo and see hoe things turn out. After all, it's just high school…we got the rest of our teens and twenties to fall in love. Why rush it?”

“You're right. In fact, you're always right.”

“Well…I try.” Kagome blushed.

 

“You're blushing…” Inuyasha informed.

“No I'm not; it's just hot in here.”

“No babe…it's pretty cold.” This made Kagome turn even brighter.

“Let's see how red I turn you…” Inuyasha leaned in and tenderly kissed Kagome upon her cheek.

 

“Um…Inuyasha=” She was cut off when Inuyasha kissed the corner of her mouth and then licked her ear. Kagome was REALLY blushing.

“Inuyasha…I don't Niruko would like that.”

“You're right. I'm sorry. I think my med are getting to me. Please don't tell him”

“Don't worry, I won't.”

 

“Thanks baby,” Inuyasha said as he got up to leave at the sound of the ringing bell. I'm really starting to develop feelings for Kagome, Inuyasha thought. I can't believe I just did that to her…

 

Later that day, Inuyasha called Kikyo and she broke up with him.

“Kikyo…tell me why.”

“Inuyasha…I can't deal with you having feelings for someone else...I love you too much for that.”

“I'll break up with him.”

“No, because I know that's not what you really want. The deal is off; you can't get me back, we're done for good.” She hung up and he tossed his cell on his bed.

Damn…I really screwed up my life, he thought…

 

_________________Eleven and half months Later______________________

 

Inuyasha now has strong feelings for Niruko, Kagome, and Kikyo. He was still pained by the breakup with Kikyo; she had been his first serious girlfriend and she understood him, well… use to understand him.

 

“I love you,” said Inuyasha as he tenderly wrapped his bear arms around Niruko's nude body.

“I love you too. I don't ever want to be without you,” said Niruko. Inuyasha smiled.

“Don't worry, you won't.”

“Niruko…”

“Yeah?”

 

“When we get a little older…and if we're still together…would you think about marrying me?”

“Inuyasha…are you serious!?” Niruko intensely gazed into Inuyasha's trusting amber eyes.

“Yes, I am. I'm really in love with you, Niruko.”

“Of course I'll marry you.” Inuyasha kissed Niruko deeply, and they went to another round of love making.

 

When they were finished, Inuyasha dreamily gazed at his lover.

“So…you don't mind marrying a crazy guy?” Inuyasha asked.

“Of course I don't, and you're not crazy. I love you just the way you are, there's nothing that I don't like about you; you're perfect,” Niruko answered.

Inuyasha kissed Niruko and walked over to the window and surveyed the scene, still nude. (The window is high enough so that only his chest and stomach is visible.)

 

The soft glowing sunlight highlighted the soft and hard contours of Inuyasha's body. His amber orbs radiated and his sliver hair shined. Quietly, Niruko reached to the side of the bed and pulled a camera out of his man-bag. He studied Inuyasha for a moment, turned off the flash, and snapped a shot.

 

At the clicking sound of the camera, Inuyasha broke out of his gaze and looked at a grinning Niruko.

“You did not just take a picture of me naked,” said Inuyasha in disbelief.

“Yes I did.” Inuyasha threw himself on the bed and looked at the picture.

“Wow…this is really good. You told me you wanted to be a photographer but I've never seen any of your work,” said Inuyasha.

 

“Thanks…”

“How do you take such good pictures?”

“Well, in life beautiful sights are created on there own, a photographer's job is to just capture them at the right moment.” In the picture, Inuyasha looked just like an illuminated angel. Suddenly, a grin slid across Inuyasha's face.

 

“What are thinking?” Niruko asked. For some time, the boys kept themselves busy with taking pictures, still nude.

 

I hope Sesshomaru won't mind watching Inuyasha and Rin tonight. I haven't been on a date in a while, Mr. Inutaisho thought while getting out of his car. I don't what I'll do when he moves out; he'll be eighteen in a few months. Mr. Inutaisho unlocked the door, hung his coat up, and started upstairs.

 

I wonder if Inuyasha would rather stay with his grandparents, I'll ask him. Just as Mr. Inutaisho was about to knock on Inuyasha's door, he heard the hallway bathroom door open. He looked over and saw the naked Niruko coming out. Seeing Inuyasha's father, Niruko flew back into the bathroom as fast as he could.

 

What in the seven hells…Mr. Inutaisho thought in shock. “Inuyasha!”

“Yeah dad?” Inuyasha asked.

“Get out, right now!” Inuyasha obeyed his father; he wore nothing but a pair of jeans.

“Didn't I say no girlfriends and no boyfriends unless I'm home!?”

“Dad come on…it's not like I can get Niruko pregnant,” said Inuyasha.

 

“That's not the point. You wanted me to treat you as if you were the same person before all this, so that's what I'm doing. Besides, it's the principle that counts.”

“Tell Niruko when he gets out I'd like to speak to both of you in my office.”

 

Inuyasha sighed. Practically in tears, Niruko came out of the bathroom.

“Hey…what's the matter baby?” Inuyasha asked as he affectionately rubbed Niruko's cheek.

“We're in big trouble,” said Niruko.

“Um…no babe, I'm in big trouble.”

“When my dad finds out about this not only will I be grounded for life, he'll send me away. He knows that I'm gay, but he still has a hard time accepting it.”

 

“He won't send you away, because he won't find out about it; I'll make sure my dad doesn't tell him.”

“You will?”

“Yeah, I don't want you leaving me, I love you.” As they walked to Mr. Inutaisho's office, Niruko smiled and blushed.

 

“Have a seat boys,” said Mr. Inutaisho. I feel like I'm in the principle's office, only this office is a lot nicer, Niruko thought.

“Dad, before you start chewing me out, can I ask you a favor?”

“What is it?”

“I know what we did was wrong, but if you tell Niruko's dad about this he'll get sent away. See, his dad knows that he's gay but he really doesn't accept it yet. So can you please not tell him, at least for Niruko if not for me?” Inuyasha pleaded.

 

“Certainly, I wasn't planning on telling Niruko's parents in the first place. Niruko…Although I accept the way my son is, I can understand a father not being able to accept his son the way any parent should. I don't think that your father is a horrible person; I think that he's just upset at the fact that he can't relate to you as well as he like to, and by sending you away he's be escaping from that problem,” Mr. Inutaisho informed.

 

“Despite the fact that as a parent I have the responsibility of informing other parents of their children's actions, I understand what you're feeling, and I don't want to hinder your father's and your relationship,” he added.

 

Niruko smiled. “Thank you Mr. Inutaisho.”

“Your welcome. As for you Inuyasha…I have one question. How did Niruko get here? And you better be honest, because if I find out you lied you'll be so in the deep end that you'll drown.”

 

“I picked him up with the SUV,” Inuyasha answered.

“You used my SUV?”

“Yes sir.”

“Son… you are grounded for three weeks.”

“Dad…”

“Hush, I don't want to hear it.”

 

After Mr. Inutaisho drove Niruko home, Inuyasha sat down on the couch studying, since every leisure item was taken from his room. Sesshomaru and Rin came bursting in the house.

“Are you grounded, Inuyasha? Studying is not something you normally do,” said Sesshomaru.

“Shut up…”

 

“Sesshomaru, I need you to do me a big favor,” said Mr. Inutaisho,

“Yes father?”

“Can you please watch Inuyasha and Rin tonight?”

“Of course, do you have a business meeting?”

“No, I uh, I have a date.”

 

“You've got to be kidding me,” Inuyasha commented.

“A date with who, your mother?” Rin said.

“No…I'm not going to tea with my dear mother. Not tonight.”

“I didn't know they were people your age around this neighborhood,” said Inuyasha.

 

Rin laughed and their father gave Inuyasha a look that said he's be grounded for life if he didn't shut it.

“Actually, she's not in this neighborhood and she's not my age.”

“Dad…I don't think poor, old Ms. Airuiko can handle all that excitement,” said Rin. Ms. Airuiko was one of Rin's teachers and she had the hots for Mr. Inutaisho.

 

“She is not Ms. Airuiko. She happens to be younger than me, a lot younger.”

“Cradle robber!” Inuyasha coughed out. For a second, the kids went silent as death and then they horrifically yelled in unison, “Kagura!?”

 

“No, calm down, I'm not going out with Kagura,” said Mr. Inutaisho.

 

A week passed and Inuyasha's symptoms were beginning to become stronger.

Inuyasha was curled up to Niruko on his couch watching a scary movie. (They are dressed this time). Inuyasha leaned in and started kissing Niruko passionately.

 

His hand began stripping off Niruko's clothes, but Niruko pulled away.

“Inuyasha…I had a really bad day and I'm not really in the mood,” said Niruko. In an extremely dark mood mixed with his depression, Inuyasha replied,

“So what if you're in a bad mood, I'll change that.” He continued taking off Niruko's clothes.

 

“Inuyasha…stop.”

“Why?”

“I don't want to have sex right now. Can we just please watch the movie?”

“Sure…you can watch it while I'm making love to you.” Inuyasha's hand started to pull down Niruko's pants.

“Inuyasha! Stop…”

 

“Don't tell me what to do.”

“It's my body.”

“You gave that up when you became mine.”

“What!? Why are talking like that? Let me go!” Niruko struggled to get out of Inuyasha's grasp but Inuyasha had him pinned down tightly.

 

“Inuyasha…please…let me go,” Niruko pleaded. Warm sweat cascaded down his body, and a fear aroused from within his heavily beating heart.

“I'm in control…and to me you're saying `Inuyasha…please…make love to me'.”

“Stop it! Get off of me! I swear if you don't stop right now I'll be out of this relationship so fast=”

 

Inuyasha cut him off. “You're not going anywhere until I get what I want! Now lay still bitch!” Inuyasha yelled.

Inuyasha took Niruko's pants off and was working on his shirt when Niruko kicked him in the stomach, driving the air out of Inuyasha's lungs.

 

Suddenly, a flash back of Naraku dragging down Inuyasha and raping him for the very first time flashed through his angry mind. he saw himself hitting Naraku, desperate to gain control over his attacker and prevent getting raped, but he couldn't; he could not have control, and Naraku raped him.

 

Now, there was someone lying before him, someone weaker than him, just as he had been weaker than Naraku. Inuyasha could easily overcome Niruko, just as Naraku had done to Inuyasha. Right then, inside Inuyasha's dark mind, Niruko was dehumanized and he became Inuyasha's puppet, a puppet to be used to gain the control that Inuyasha had lost.

 

Until he lay motionless from the pain, Inuyasha violently punched Niruko - over and over again. Luckily, Sesshomaru had come inside from watching as Rin ran off to a friend's house. Hearing the shouting, Sesshomaru rushed in and pulled his brother off of Niruko.

 

“What the hell are doing Inuyasha!?” Sesshomaru asked in a panic.

“Let go of me…” Inuyasha ordered.

“No, you're having an episode…”

“No, I am fine, now let go.”

“Inuyasha, I'm not letting go until you calm down.”

 

“I'm not Inuyasha, so stop calling me that.”

“I don't give a rat's ass what you named your alter personality, you're still my brother and you are still Inuyasha.”

“My name's Despair.”

“No, it isn't.”

 

“I'm giving you one last chance to let me go…”

“No.”

“Let me go damn it!” Inuyasha elbowed Sesshomaru in the stomach but Sesshomaru still held on to him. He continued to kick and hit his older brother. Horrified, Niruko finished putting his pants back on and stared at Inuyasha, tears rolled down his cheek.

 

“Why are you crying? I love you, bitch. Didn't you say you wanted to marry me? You said you loved me. Why are you afraid?” Niruko didn't answer.

“Come on…you love the way I fuck you…the way you moan and scream my name.”

 

“Niruko, I need you to go in the kitchen, look in the cabinet above the stove, and get a blue pill bottle and the shots next to it. Hurry,” Sesshomaru ordered. Niruko obeyed and handed them to Sesshomaru.

 

“Inuyasha, open up.”

“I'm not taking that. You people think I'm crazy and I'm not. The hell with this family. I'm fine, now let me go and leave me alone. I want to be alone!”

Cautious of his fangs, Sesshomaru opened Inuyasha's mouth and forced the pill down his throat.

“Call my dad,” Sesshomaru said to Niruko. After telling him what happened, Mr. Inutaisho instructed Sesshomaru to stick Inuyasha with the shot in shoulder. Sesshomaru did so and a few minutes later, Inuyasha was asleep.

 

“You dad said he's on the way home,” Niruko informed.

“Sit down.” Sesshomaru bandaged up Niruko's wounds.

“I am truly sorry about this,” said Sesshomaru.

“Don't be I'm fine.”

 

“If I hadn't gotten here in time you would be dead. This is my fault; I should have brought Inuyasha out with me, I just didn't think he'd do this. He took his meds and he's never been violent like this.”

“It's not your fault. I don't blame you.”

 

“You might not blame me but your parents are a different story.”

“I don't want to tell them.”

“We have to, it wouldn't be right if we didn't.”

 

Mr. Inutaisho came rushing into the room with his lovely date.

“Boys, are you all alright?” He asked in a panic.

“We are fine dad.”

“Niruko…I'm sorry. How in the hell am I going to tell your parents about this?”

“It's okay Mr. Inutaisho, I'm not that hurt,” said Niruko.

“No, it's not okay and you really hurt.”

 

“Look, I know I'm bruised and cut and scared, but it wasn't Inuyasha's fault; he's got a disorder that he can't control. He's doing everything he can, but it just overcame him, that's all,” said Niruko. Mr. Inutaisho smiled.

“Thanks for your empathy,” said Mr. Inutaisho.

“No problem. Inuyasha means a lot to me.” Niruko had not told any adults that he loved Inuyasha yet.

 

“I can tell. Sesshomaru, where's Rin?”

“She's at a friend's house.”

“Shori, may I speak to you alone for a moment?” Mr. Inutaisho asked.

“Yeah, sure.” They walked off into his office.

 

“I'm really sorry about tonight. Things got really out of hand.”

“Don't be sorry really, I understand; my little brother is bipolar and sometime he'd have episodes in front of company. My parents use to get so upset and embarrassed that they use to take it out on him.”

 

“Thank you for your empathy. I just don't know what to do anymore. If you don't mind me asking, was it this hard with your younger brother?”

“It was worse, we didn't have any shots to sedate him, so my father would have to hold him down and force sleeping pills on him so he'd calm down. I just remember the night when he'd cry himself to sleep with all the guilt he had for so called “wrecking my parents' life”. I'd just sit up in his room and say, “mom and dad are jerks. Conceited, mean, prestigious, jackasses, but they're jackasses that love you.”

“I can't imagine blaming Inuyasha. He needs to be institutionalized, I know that, but I have a hard time putting my son in a place where he'll be away from me. I could barely stand it when I had to put him in an institution for two weeks.”

 

“You have a much bigger heart than any of my parents did. They couldn't wait to send my brother away. When I told my brother that our parents loved him, I lied. I knew they didn't love him for the right reasons. Until he was diagnosed with BP, he was “perfect”; straight A's, captain of the football team, handsome, and popular. He had everything going for him. Soon after he was being treated for BP, he developed depression. He had gone camping for a nuthouse program thing and I guess he reached his limits; he jumped off a cliff and died.”

 

“I'm sorry.”

“Don't be, it was my parents who drove him to it. I hadn't spoken to them ever since.”